


Yizhan Through The Years

by jalpari



Series: • Yizhan Diaries • [1]
Category: Actor RPF, Chinese Actor RPF, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV) RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, BJYX | Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan is Real, Bottom Wang Yi Bo/Top Xiao Zhan, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Bozhan, Consensual Kink, Domestic Bliss, Drama & Romance, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Light BDSM, M/M, RPF, Roleplay, Sexual Roleplay, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Top Wang Yi Bo/Bottom Xiao Zhan, Wangxiao - Freeform, Yizhan - Freeform, bjyx - Freeform, bjyxszd, lsfy - Freeform, zsww - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-21
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:20:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 294
Words: 382,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22343227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jalpari/pseuds/jalpari
Summary: Yizhan's journey from the first day at the workshop for 'The Untamed' to the present...and maybe even into the future.All my other Yizhan stories -Yizhan diariesYizhan AUsMy Twitter -@jalpari_yizhan,@yizhanmood(Turkish translation (Wattpad))(Portugese translation (Wattpad))(Vietnamese translation(Wattpad))(Polish translation(Wattpad))
Relationships: Wang Yi Bo & Xiao Zhan, Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan, Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan | Sean
Series: • Yizhan Diaries • [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1611649
Comments: 8543
Kudos: 3783





	1. You both have to become really close ASAP

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Português brasileiro available: [Yizhan através dos anos](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25432633) by [SnowySpacePeach](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnowySpacePeach/pseuds/SnowySpacePeach)
  * Translation into Türkçe available: [Yizhan Through The Years](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25941184) by [wybestboy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wybestboy/pseuds/wybestboy)
  * Translation into Tiếng Việt available: [[BJYX] Tháng năm của Nhất Chiến](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28535781) by [klawfeedingcats](https://archiveofourown.org/users/klawfeedingcats/pseuds/klawfeedingcats)
  * Translation into Polski available: [yizhan through the years :: pl](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28999332) by [nostalgixx](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nostalgixx/pseuds/nostalgixx)



> I am a fan of 'Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation', 'Mo Dao Zu Shi', and now 'The Untamed'. There's countless Yizhan FF here and so many of them are just spectacular. But this is just my way of getting it out of my system before I am completely consumed by it...or perhaps it's already too late for that since I am actually officially writing Yizhan FF now! 
> 
> Anyway, in case anyone finds this among the huge pile of bjyx stories...happy reading!
> 
> P. S. After referring to XZ as Xiao Zhan initially, I have referred to him in my narration as Zhan for the rest of the story unless I mention him in a dialogue in which case I use the appropriate way of addressing him such as Zhan-ge or Zhan-Zhan or A-Zhan or Xiao Zhan. This is not out of disrespect, I just realized my mistake hundreds of chapters later. Hope no one is offended by this. I have corrected this mistake in all my other fics.

* * *

Xiao Zhan took a deep breath and walked to the room where the reading would take place. He tried to calm his frazzled nerves but with each step, his mind repeated the same words over and over, unsettling him again.

_You’re not a real actor.  
You’ve had no acting training.  
You’re too old for this industry.  
You should just go back to your normal life. _

With a groan, Xiao Zhan dragged his hand down his face and paused in front of the door.

“Stop it, Xiao Zhan!” He mumbled to himself. “Just do your best and believe in yourself!”

With these frustrated words of encouragement, he turned the knob and walked into the reading room.

* * *

Wang Yibo shuffled restlessly in his chair as his eyes darted about the room. Most of the main cast had already gathered, but the chair next to him was still empty. He had briefly met Xiao Zhan when X-Nine made an appearance on his variety show, but that meeting barely counted as an interaction. All he remembered was the funny self introduction Xiao Zhan had given - gun fingers and a wink followed by an embarrassed blush - and the dazzling smile that he flashed so generously and genuinely.

His shuffling came to a halt when the door opened and he saw a tall person enter hesitantly. 

“Apologies,” Xiao Zhan spoke softly and bowed, “for keeping you all waiting. I...I lost my way in the building,” he rubbed the back of his neck. 

And there it was. The smile.

Wang Yibo sat up straight and removed his cap. He could feel the familiar nervousness rising from the pit of his stomach. It happened every time he began a new project and had to meet his co-stars. And now, he was about to meet the other main lead in the drama, with who he would have to spend the entire summer. He prayed that they would get along, which was always a fifty-fifty kind of deal given his own personality.

Xiao Zhan made his way to the empty seat beside Wang Yibo, bowing to everyone along the way. As he sat down, he gave a quick side glance to Wang Yibo accompanied with a bow and an expression that Wang Yibo could not read. 

“Alright everybody,” the director cleared his throat, “let’s begin.”

* * *

Xiao Zhan stood in one corner gulping down his green tea like a parched desert animal. The first half of the day had gone by so quickly and he had been so immersed in the reading that he had forgotten to stay hydrated. He nearly jumped out of his skin and spilled some tea when he heard a voice behind him.

“Xiao Zhan!” The director called out to him cheerfully. “There you are!”

Xiao Zhan bowed briefly and placed his thermos bottle down, careful not to spill any more of his precious green tea. Before he could say anything, he was taken by the elbow and lead towards the cafeteria. 

“Go...go on,” the director nudged him inside. 

“Go...where?” Xiao Zhan looked at him confused.

“Go to Yibo,” the director responded, offering no further explanation.

“Uhh...but why? I just had some snacks.”

“No...no. This won’t do. You must go eat with him...talk to him. This won’t do.”

“Sorry, Zheng-laoshi. I'm not able to follow. What won't do?”

“You in one corner, him in one corner,” the director clucked his tongue and shook his head. “You both are the main leads. You have to have a special bond. There are fifteen days till we begin shooting. You both have to become really close as soon as possible.”

Xiao Zhan let out an involuntary chuckle, thinking that it was a joke. But when he saw the serious intent on the director’s face, his smile vanished and he gulped the chuckle back in. With a bow, he quickly made his way to the table at which Yibo sat alone, engrossed in his phone. 

He had briefly met Yibo when he had gone on a variety show as an idol. He had a bad memory about such things and couldn't recall much from that meeting though. The only thing he remembered was how much fun he had when he hopped around the traditional sticks and how blown away he was when he saw Yibo dance. 

As he approached the table, he became curious as to why Yibo was sitting alone. He looked around and saw everyone eating quietly in small clusters and came to the conclusion that Yibo probably liked being alone in his down time. He became uneasy at the thought of barging into someone’s personal space and paused and turned back.

His director still stood at the entrance of the cafeteria, eyeing him and gesturing him with both hands to keep walking towards Yibo. With a grin, the director gave him a thumbs up. Xiao Zhan smiled awkwardly and returned the thumbs up shakily.

* * *

Yibo was caught up in the mobile game that he was playing when a small voice distracted him.

“Uhh...is this seat taken?”

Yibo spared a half glance up at the person but did a double take when he saw Xiao Zhan standing in front of him, smiling.

“Uhh…,” he glanced around at the groups eating at the other tables, “no...no one’s sitting here.”

“Can I...sit here?” 

“Uhh...sure,” Yibo stood up halfway and bowed politely, gesturing for Xiao Zhan to take the seat.

Awkward silence ensued. Yibo’s eyes flitted from Xiao Zhan to his food to his phone. Xiao Zhan’s fingers fiddled with the table cloth hanging over the side while his eyes remained focused on the table. 

_Come on, Xiao Zhan. Say something. You have to become really close ASAP._

The director’s words echoed in his head and he rolled his eyes unintentionally. Yibo noticed the expression and stiffened a bit.

_He’s bored. He expects me to talk. Oh no! He’s going to be a chatterbox just like this character. Why did he even come and sit here?!_

“Zheng-laoshi told me to come sit with you because he wants us to become really close ASAP…,” Xiao Zhan blurted out all at once.

Xiao Zhan’s eyes widened in shock at how guileless and tactless he was. Yibo’s eyes narrowed in confusion and bafflement.

“What?” 

After a few seconds of silence, Xiao Zhan burst out laughing. Yibo watched, his confusion growing with every giggle and snort, as Xiao Zhan devolved into a fit of laughter until he was reduced to tears and clutching his stomach.

Yibo noticed the others turning around and staring at them in equal if not more confusion, but his attention quickly returned to Xiao Zhan as the teary eyed, flushed-face man finally spoke again.

“I’m sorry...I’m sorry,” Xiao Zhan wiped the tears streaming down his now red cheeks. “I didn't mean to blurt it all out like that,” he shook his head as his giggles subsided and settled into a wide smile. 

Xiao Zhan let out a long sigh.

“Zheng-laoshi asked me to come eat with you so that we could…,” Xiao Zhan paused hesitantly and Yibo thought he saw a faint blush on Xiao Zhan’s face, “...become good friends…”

Yibo recovered from his confusion as Xiao Zhan’s words slowly began making sense.

“Oh…,” he muttered, “...like now?”

“I think his exact words were _‘you both have to become really close ASAP’_ ,” Xiao Zhan covered his mouth and giggled some more.

Yibo couldn’t help but smirk a little at the hilarious giggles coming out of Xiao Zhan.

“Why would he say that?” His trademark poker face returned.

“Because he was concerned that we...we both need to...you know...since we have to portray the two main male leads…”

“Ahh…,” Yibo nodded. “He wants us to have chemistry.”

Xiao Zhan nodded in response and then grew quiet once again.

“But we can't do this now,” Yibo broke the silence.

“Huh?” Xiao Zhan grew nervous.

“Zheng-laoshi wanted you to come eat with me, right?”

“Yes…”

“Well then, we need to get you some food first,” Yibo smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Video links:
> 
> Xiao Zhan and X-Nine on TTXS with Yibo as host -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BDAfFAnT9nc


	2. Cultivating train tracks

* * *

The director looked back down to his script, a satisfied smile spreading across his face. Opposite him, his two leads sat side by side in a comfortable camaraderie, unlike the first half of the day. They even exchanged grins occasionally. Although they were still a far cry from being close or even friends maybe, he could see some of the tension had melted away. 

As they progressed through the scenes, the dynamics between Xiao Zhan and Yibo started to flow more naturally. 

“Wei Ying!” Yibo exclaimed, “What are you doing?” He said portraying irritation and discomfort.

“What do you think!?” Xiao Zhan gave a smug and naughty smile. “Taking my clothes off!”

Everyone around the table giggled at the words and the director was sure he saw a faint upturn of Yibo’s lips at Zhan’s innocent grin and excitement at the hilarious scene.

“Okay...that’s good,” the director interrupted, “but why is Wei Ying pretending to remove Lan Zhan’s clothes when he is the one who is supposed to disrobe?”

At those words, the giggles turned into laughter while Zhan’s face turned into one of shock and embarrassment. He hadn't realized what actions his hands were doing as he practised delivering his dialogs.

“Sorry! I didn’t...realize,” he hid behind his script and looked at Yibo who was biting his lower lip to control a smirk.

Within seconds though, the smirk was gone and Yibo continued looking down at his script. Much to Zhan’s relief, no one dwelled on the incident and they proceeded with the rest of the scene to the point where Lan Zhan vomits out the blood.

“Alright...nice...good job, boys. Let’s try a different emotion now. The scene where Lan Zhan confronts him about his new cultivation method.”

Xiao Zhan turned several pages ahead and noticed Yibo still flipping back and forth looking for the scene. He casually leaned over and turned it to where the scene was and tapped a finger on the relevant section on the page.

Yibo nodded and watched as the smiling face turned away from him and the delicate hand retreated behind Zhan’s own script once again.

_He has such small hands for such a tall person. Is he taller than me? He looks taller. Doesn’t Lan Zhan have to be taller than Wei Ying?_

Yibo snapped out of his thoughts when he heard Zhan’s voice fumble.

“...train track…”

_Train track? What’s a train track doing in ancient China?!_

Yibo moved his finger along each line to find any mention of train tracks but then stopped when he realized what had happened. Xiao Zhan gave a groan and started the sentence once more.

“I am cultivating a train track…”

Yibo couldn’t help but smirk at Zhan’s mispronunciation of the words ‘heretical path’.

“...aaaaaa!” Xiao Zhan groaned louder but with a wide smile plastered on his face, prompting Yibo to break into a bright smile as well.

“Keep going,” the director encouraged Xiao Zhan even though he was on the verge of laughing as well.

“ My train track uses talismans…,” Xiao Zhan tried to continue with a straight face, “and uses music…”

But Yibo’s sudden laughter broke his concentration and he lost his composure. From the corner of his eye, he saw Yibo throw his head back with a deep, genuine laugh. Xiao Zhan leaned forward and tried to reel his own laughter in with a gesture of his hand. A faint smile lingered however when he noticed Yibo still laughing as he hid behind his script. Xiao Zhan felt a tingle in his stomach from the intense embarrassment he felt.

“Let’s take a short break,” the director chuckled and shook his head.

As everyone move around, some to stretch, some to walk around, some to open their phones, Xiao Zhan remained in his seat reading the script over and over again, making notes, rocking back and forth.

“Where are you cultivating that you need train tracks?” Yibo interrupted his thoughts.

Xiao Zhan couldn’t help but smile again as he turned to look at him. Yibo leaned back a bit and levelled his gaze at Zhan, asking the question in all seriousness, causing Xiao Zhan to smile even more at his clumsiness.

“I’m going to go lie down on those very train tracks and die of embarrassment,” Xiao Zhan shook his head and leaned back as well, returning Yibo’s gaze.

“As if Lan Zhan would let his Wei Ying die like that, “ Yibo snorted and ran his hand through his hair.

Xiao Zhan froze.

 _His Wei Ying._

Carefully, he looked at Yibo and spoke again.

“So...you’ve...read the novel?”

“You?” Yibo nodded.

Xiao Zhan nodded back. Before anything else could be said, the director returned and the reading resumed.

* * *

That night, the first thing Xiao Zhan did when he got back home was to shower and tend to his bruises. Everyone in the cast who was part of the training had similar bruises thanks to their inexperience at martial arts. 

“This workshop is going to be intense, huh?” Xiao Zhan spoke out loud to his empty apartment.

With a sigh, he got up and put the first aid kit back in its place and slid under his blanket. After tucking himself in until he was cozy, Xiao Zhan pulled out his phone and one by one replied to all the unread WeChat messages he had received during the day. 

He was scrolling through Weibo when a sudden idea popped into his head. He bit his lip and slowly typed a name in the search bar and pressed enter. The first result in the long list was a promotional video for a new reality show ‘Produce 101’. Xiao Zhan scrolled past the next few - another promotional video for TTXS, an ad shoot for some sports brand - until he came across one that caught his attention. It was a compilation video titled ‘Yibo cute moments’. 

Xiao Zhan spent the next three minutes aww-ing, giggling, or laughing at Wang Yibo's antics from his teenage years to the present.

“Wow,” Xiao Zhan caught his breath when the video was over. “He isn’t what he seems like at first. Wow.”

* * *

“Owww!” Yibo shrieked and withdrew his hand immediately.

He had endured countless injuries over the years thanks to his love for all kinds of adventure sports and freestyle dancing but it never made it any easier to not flinch when applying antiseptic to his bruises. 

Somehow, he managed to finish the process and then he leaned against his headboard in relief. He slid down and turned to his side, hugging a pillow, facing the bedroom door, that was propped open ever so slightly to let in a dim stream of light from the corridor. Along another wall, his TV was turned on to a random sports channel with the volume turned down to the bare minimum. 

He picked up his phone and began scrolling through his WeChats and Weibo. After some minutes, several yawns escaped his mouth, partly out of sleepiness and partly out of boredom. He didn't like being alone in the apartment and he definitely didn't like sleeping alone in bed. But over the years, he had grown used to it.

He checked his alarms and then shut his phone and put it aside. As soon as he closed his eyes though, a thought popped into his head. The thought was more of an image than an idea. The image of smiling person that kept mispronouncing words. Yibo grinned and picked his phone up again and typed the name of said person in Weibo’s search. 

After scrolling past some clips from Zhan’s latest TV series, Yibo paused on a set of gifs. They were all of Zhan's different expressions, each one cuter than the previous one.

“Wow,” Yibo giggled softly. “I can’t believe he is six years older than me. Wow.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Video links:
> 
> The Untamed cast during the pre-shoot training workshop -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOFKf9g_rss


	3. Lonely stars

* * *

Two weeks had gone by pretty quickly. Yibo had to leave after the first week of the workshop to get back to the shooting of TTXS and Produce 101. His schedule was hectic but it was what he had wanted. And his management had obliged, more than happy to milk him for all he was worth. 

Yibo was happy. Overworked but happy. At least his management took care of him in whatever way they could. Plus, his TTXS brothers and the other mentors always fussed over him and spoiled him rotten. There were some great perks to always being the youngest one in the room.

But there was a downside to pushing himself professionally too. It came at the cost of his life. Although he wouldn't know what a normal life was if it hit him straight in the face, thanks to him pursuing his career as a trainee from his early teens away from home, Yibo did know that something was missing. He missed things he didn't know the feeling of, things he had never had, things he knew he wanted.

Such as not being alone when he wasn't working. Such as not being judged by others because of his natural tendency to take time to open up to people. Such as not being able to walk down the street to his favorite bakery whenever he felt like it. Such as not being able to get a break from the haters and fake fans no matter how much he tried to avoid them. 

He crawled into his apartment at night, exhausted from the continuous shuttling between the sets of TTXS and 101 all week. In a few more days, he would be on location for the Untamed. The thought made him feel somewhat at peace. He would be far away, cut off from the rest of the world, in the forest and mountains. But then he groaned as he remembered, his schedule still demanded some travel in between for the other shows.

Yibo let out a deep sigh and sat by the window, watching the rain outside. He scrolled through his phone, tapped on the screen and then placed the phone down beside him. A gentle melody wafted up from the device and slowly blended into the air all around him. 

_If I were young and promising – not inferior - and knew what was precious...those pipe dreams that I never fulfilled for you...it is my shameful existence._

Yibo liked melancholic songs, especially this one which always struck a chord within him. It was almost as if someone was telling him not to make this mistake. He would never be inferior, always working on improving himself, following his dreams with all his heart. He would never forget his true self and lose sight of what is important. He would never take someone’s love for granted, if he was ever lucky enough to find it in the first place. He would not make those mistakes. He might be lonely now but he won’t be alone forever.

Yibo looked up at the stars that kept hiding and peeking from behind the clouds and rain drops. In one corner, he noticed a lonely star and let a sad smile escape his lips as he stared at it. But soon, the clouds near the star dispersed to reveal another lonely star close by. Together, they shone brighter. Yibo’s smile shone brighter too.

* * *

By the end of the second week of training, Xiao Zhan and the rest of the cast were thoroughly drained and fatigued. 

“Alright,” the director stood in front of the group on the last day. “I know it has been hard...but our journey has only begun. Take some rest, recharge, let these characters sink into your skin...and we will meet again in a few days on location for the prayer ceremony before we begin shooting!”

With several bows and thank you’s, everyone filed out of the training room and dispersed. Xiao Zhan sat by his bag, waiting for a message from his manager. He didn't know what travel arrangements had been made for him to get home right now, or for going on location in a few days for that matter. He tried to suppress his growing anxiety as his calls went unanswered. He tapped his fingers on his thigh and waited for a few more minutes.

He wasn’t surprised. This is how it had been for almost a year now. The waning support from his management company the moment he expressed an interest in pursuing acting could be seen in small things - not putting him up for roles especially lead roles, telling him he didn't have the charisma for lead roles, dropping the ball on his scheduling and ‘forgetting’ to provide him with simple yet important things like transport and accommodation when traveling and so the list went on.

His mantra was to keep his head down, keep working hard, and powering through, believing that everything would eventually straighten itself. But as more time passed, the gnawing anxiety kept increasing. 

With an exhale, Xiao Zhan stood up with his bags and headed out the door. He called a cab service and got in silently when a cab showed up twenty minutes later. As the cab made its way to his apartment, Xiao Zhan gazed out and observed the rain droplets sliding down the window, wishing he could share this moment with someone, the happenings of his day with someone, his worries with someone. His earphones blocked the outside world and eventually all he could feel was a sense of magic as the droplets kept falling to the melody of one of his favorite songs.

_I can't wait for you to be my brightest star. I am willing to lend you my light and project it to you until your brilliant light hangs quietly in the distant sky...Twinkles twinkling like your body, hidden among the many lone stars. I can find you hanging on, light shining in the sky reflecting my loneliness, reminding me that I am just a lonely star…_

* * *

A few days later at the prayer ceremony, everyone seemed a little lost. For most of them, it was their first time in an ancient fantasy drama show of this scale and magnitude with a well established strong fan base because of the novel and anime. One could see the nervousness, doubt, and overwhelming emotions on everyone’s face. Most of them were quiet throughout the ceremony.

The director watched as Xiao Zhan and Yibo barely interacted. Both of them prayed with sincerity and true dedication but remained quiet the entire time, never even as much as glancing at each other. His concerns about their connection and chemistry returned once again. He took a deep breath and sent out his prayer.

_Let A-Ling take shape with the blood, tears, and sweat we will put into it. Help these children find it in them to relate to these characters, their emotions, and their trials and tribulations. Let this experience teach them about values and more importantly, about love. ___

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Video links:
> 
> Prayer ceremony at the start of shooting (first 30 sec) -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAY7kremWBM


	4. Don't be so formal, laoshi

* * *

“Oh…”

Xiao Zhan entered the room slowly and looked around. It was of modest size and had all the basic amenities and much to his relief, an extremely effective fan. He was already dreading the effect the jungle heat would have on his overactive sweat glands. 

But that was not what the ‘oh’ was for. He pursed his lips and stared at the two beds before him. He was going to be sharing the room with Yibo. He had enough experience rooming with others, right from his university days to his X-Nine days. But this time it was different. This time he would be sharing it with someone who he had barely spent any time with. And given their grueling schedule, this also meant that he would have no time alone if he needed some peace of mind.

“It’s been a while since I’ve bunked with someone,” a deep voice snapped him out of his thoughts and he turned around startled. 

Yibo stood at the entrance with one backpack hanging off one shoulder and another bag held in both hands. Xiao Zhan thought he heard a tinge of uncertainty and nervousness in Yibo’s voice but then again, he was still coming around to the idea of sharing a room as well. 

“Don’t worry,” Xiao Zhan composed himself and flashed a smile, “I am not difficult to live with. I promise I won't get in your way.”

“Hmm,” Yibo gave him a brisk nod.

Yibo walked in but then immediately paused mid-step. 

“Do you have a preference?” He tilted his head in the directions of the beds.

“Not really,” Xiao Zhan shook his head.

“Is it okay if I take the one by the bathroom? You can...take the one by the window...”

“Sure!” Xiao Zhan picked up his own bags and walked over to what was now to be his bed for the next four months.

“Thanks,” Yibo dropped his bags by his bed with a sigh.

Silence ensued as both of them went about their own routines - unpacking, arranging, organizing, settling in.

“Can I...do you want to…,” Yibo mumbled.

“Do I want to what?” Xiao Zhan asked without turning around as he put his clothes in the shared wardrobe.

“...use the shower first?”

Xiao Zhan looked back over his shoulder with a gentle smile.

“You don’t have to be so formal, _Wang-laoshi_ ,” he chuckled before continuing to arrange his clothes. “Go ahead...I still have some unpacking to do.”

Upon receiving no response, Xiao Zhan turned around, wondering if he had said something wrong. But as his gaze rested on Yibo, he was surprised to see him standing with his arms crossed across his chest and a smirk plastered on his face.

“But how can I not be formal, _Xiao-laoshi_?” He spoke with feigned formality. “One must show respect to the elderly.”

Xiao Zhan’s eyes widened in shock at his words and for a brief moment, Yibo’s smile faltered wondering if he had gone too far. But before the doubt could unsettle him completely, he saw his face stretch into a smile even as he exclaimed loudly.

“Wang Yibo!!”

Yibo didn't know he had been holding his breath until he exhaled at Xiao Zhan’s dazzling smile. He cackled as his smile grew wider and much to his own surprise, ended up getting smacked in the face with a shirt. With a grin, he caught hold of the shirt as it slid down his face, involuntarily breathing in a faint scent that he couldn’t quite put a label on.

_What is that smell? It smells so good. I wonder what perfume he uses._

“Weren’t you going to shower?”

“Oh,” Yibo yanked the shirt off him and threw it back at Xiao Zhan realizing that he had been holding it to his face longer than was appropriate, “...yeah.”

With that, he made his way to the bathroom. Xiao Zhan walked over to his bed as he heard the shower turn on. He noticed Yibo’s side of the room had already been set up like a mini-room. On the nightstand, there was a photo of him with his parents, beside which there were some knick-knacks like a small lego bike and by his bed, a skateboard rested, propped up against the wall. The bed itself had been un-made and a cozy blanket, Xiao Zhan guessed that it belonged to Yibo, had replaced the linen that was originally on the bed.

Xiao Zhan looked away when the shower was turned off and quickly gathered his own towel and toiletries. When the door opened, a fresh-faced Yibo stepped out, fully clothed, hair still dripping wet, and a relaxed expression on his face as he wiped down his hair.

“All yours.”

Xiao Zhan nodded and made his way in and closed the door. The entire bathroom smelled like the first rain. He couldn't help but close his eyes and take a deep breath, letting himself enjoy the blissful fragrance. 

_Is this what Yibo smells like?!_

His question was answered almost immediately when he saw the hotel soap and shampoo that read ‘Love in the rain’.

“Oh well, “ he muttered to himself and then an involuntary thought passed through his head for reasons he could not fathom.

_I wonder what Yibo smells like._

“What the…,” Xiao Zhan exclaimed at his own reflection in the mirror, baffled and bewildered. “Why would you even…,” he rolled his eyes and walked to the shower. “I must be more tired than I thought. The heat is already getting the better of me.”

* * *

Yibo rested against the headboard, pillow in his lap, as he scrolled through his phone lazily, almost inattentively. He glanced at Xiao Zhan’s side of the room. It was almost empty with barely anything kept outside. Most of Xiao Zhan’s things were either in the wardrobe, inside the nightstand drawer, or in his suitcase.

_Doesn’t he want to feel at home in this place? Yibo thought bewildered. We have to be in the same room for four whole months._

But Yibo had been doing this for longer than Xiao Zhan and was used to travelling and living out of a suitcase. He had developed his own routines and ways to make himself feel at home at every new location and in every new hotel. Xiao Zhan, on the other hand, was just getting his solo acting career started and would soon discover the importance of such tiny rituals and tokens from home.

He turned his gaze back to his phone when the bathroom door opened and Xiao Zhan stepped out. Yibo was about to bring up the topic he had been waiting to discuss when he saw that Xiao Zhan was, unlike he had been after his shower, still in his towel. It had been a while since Yibo had roomed with other boys. The last time was with his band mates. So it took him a while to regain his composure and remind himself that this was completely normal. But for the first few seconds, he couldn't help but admire how handsome Xiao Zhan was. 

_He’s definitely meant to be an actor._ Yibo thought. _What with that beautiful face, that tall, lean body with never-ending legs, those naturally pouty lips…_

Yibo nearly choked as he realized his train of thoughts.

_What the…Yibo, why would you even…_

“Everything okay?” Xiao Zhan approached him with a glass of water and a concerned look on his face. 

Yibo nodded and drank the water so as to distract himself and calm his flushed face. 

“Yeah, nothing...just tired I think...making me think all kinds of dumb things…”

Xiao Zhan turned away remembering the silly thought he had had in the bathroom. 

“Yeah...I can relate.”

“So...actually...there was something I wanted to discuss…”

“What’s up?” Xiao Zhan pulled on his pajamas and removed his towel and placed it carefully on the chair next to his bed.

“I...sometimes…,” Yibo bit his lips and looked down at his hands, “sometimes I need to keep a small light on or have some sound in the background in order to...fall asleep…”

Yibo could feel his face heating up. He had not had to have this conversation with anyone in a long time. And it had been way less awkward saying it to his equally young band mates as a fifteen year old boy than to his co-star as a twenty year old actor.

“Do you have trouble falling asleep?” Xiao Zhan asked with neither an amused nor a judgmental tone.

It was nothing like the reaction Yibo had expected. He had anticipated a joke or two at his expense or a barrage of questions as to why he had this need.

“Sometimes...but I promise I won’t do it too often,” Yibo added quickly.

“It’s alright, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan walked over and placed a hand on his shoulder. “I told you there’s no need to be formal but thanks for letting me know. Do what you need.”

With a pat, Xiao Zhan went back to his bed and got under his blankets, tucking himself in until he looked like a very happy and cozy spring roll. Yibo couldn't help but feel amused at his sleeping style. 

_How can someone so tall, look so tiny!?_

Yibo walked to the bathroom and turned the light back on. He closed the door almost completely, leaving just enough of a gap to let a sliver of light come through. He glanced at Xiao Zhan’s bed to make sure that the light didn't reach it directly or disturb him in any way. Then, he laid down as well and gave a quick kiss to his family photo. Satisfied, he turned to one side, his back to Xiao Zhan, and closed his eyes. He couldn’t help but smile at how smoothly the conversation had gone.

“Thanks...Zhan-ge.”

“Goodnight, Bo-di.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wang Yibo is not cold and aloof and in fact, can be sentimental and open. You can see such moments in many of his interviews or TTXS episodes.
> 
> Xiao Zhan is a tall man but a tiny baby!! If you don't agree, go watch any of the "Our Song" episodes when he plays games.


	5. You can gaze at him with 'that' expression later

* * *

When Yibo woke up, Xiao Zhan was already gone and his bed was made neatly. Half asleep, he sighed in relief that the curtains were drawn shut and no sunlight was jarring his eyes. 

_Weren’t the curtains open last night? Did Zhan-ge shut them so that I wouldn’t be disturbed?_

_Zhan-ge_. Yibo repeated in his mind. 

He felt a tingle in his stomach at the thought of how quickly they had reached this level of comfort. He was half relieved and half baffled since this had never been the case with anyone. Even with his Uniq boys, it had taken him a few months to open up and be comfortable. He picked up his phone and squinted at the screen.

7:20 am.

He didn't have any scenes to shoot until 11 and had to get to hair and make-up by 9. He closed his eyes again and tried to fall asleep, wanting to make the most of this rare opportunity where his schedule allowed him to sleep in. Finally, after several minutes of tossing and turning, Yibo decided to get up. 

_Zhan-ge has scenes to shoot now. Maybe I can go watch and learn something from him._

Yibo smirked as he imagined Xiao Zhan’s reaction if he said that to him directly. Excited at the prospect of teasing Xiao Zhan, he rushed into the bathroom to freshen up and within fifteen minutes, was out the door.

* * *

Xiao Zhan plonked himself down on the chair as the next scene was being set up. He bit his lips as he went over the shot he had just given, wondering if he had done his best. He was about to ask the director to give it one more take, when he heard someone address him.

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo called out as he approached him.

Xiao Zhan turned around in mild surprise.

_Isn’t his scene later? If it were me, I would never get out of bed until I absolutely had to._

Yibo was wearing black basketball shorts and a loose white t-shirt. His hair was damp and with a grin, he slid down on the chair beside Xiao Zhan. Xiao Zhan could smell the faint fragrance of the hotel soap on him. 

“How’s it going, Zhan-ge?”

“Okay…”

“Just okay?”

“I’m not sure. I can't tell if I’m doing a good job.”

“What did Zheng-laoshi say?”

“He seemed satisfied with the scene.”

“Which scene was it?”

“It was the one where we are all going into the lecture hall in Gusu on the first day of class and I block Jin-Zixuan’s way and tease him by bowing down and making way for him in an exaggerated way.”

“Why aren’t you happy with it?”

“I feel like...maybe...I wonder if I overacted in it…it’s the first day and I’m so unsure…,” Xiao Zhan replied and then leaned back.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself. I’m sure Zheng-laoshi would have said something if you had.”

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan pursed his lips, “maybe you’re right. How come you’re here early?” He tilted his head in the direction of Yibo.

Yibo noticed the mole below Xiao Zhan’s lips but quickly averted his gaze and looked up at his eyes. They were a dark chestnut brown and at the moment, had a faint shadow of dejection.

“Woke up early and couldn’t fall asleep ...downside of having early morning schedules everyday I guess…,” Yibo shrugged.

“What scenes do you have today?”

“Xiao-laoshi is so busy that he doesn’t look at the schedule sheet! I’m in the same scene. When class begins and you start causing trouble…”

“Wei Wuxian starts causing trouble…,” Xiao Zhan corrected with a small grin.

Yibo looked satisfied as the cloud of dejection began to disperse from Xiao Zhan’s eyes and he decided to continue the banter.

“Xiao-laoshi is always right. I was wrong. Wei Wuxian starts causing trouble. Xiao-loshi could never trouble anyone. Xiao-laoshi is the best...”

“Wang Yibo!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed with a faint blush. “Are you even human?!”

 _So he can’t handle being praised._ Yibo smirked and made a mental note, excited to use this tactic to tease him more in the future.

* * *

When Yibo came back to set in full costume, audible gasps and exclamations could be heard in his trail. Embarrassed yet happy, Yibo made his way to where Xiao Zhan stood with Zhoucheng. 

“Wow,” Xiao Zhan declared and looked at Yibo from top to bottom. “Handsome. Perfect. Have you ever seen someone so beautiful, Zhoucheng?”

Xiao Zhan snickered as Yibo tried to control his blush and ignore the comment.

“Truly China’s most eligible bachelor. Who wouldn’t fall for this small face? Yibo! We are all going to look so ugly next to you in the scenes!”

And that did it. It was too much for Yibo to bear any longer. Ever so lightly, he smacked Xiao Zhan’s forearm and bared his teeth. Then, with a smirk, he decided to use the tactic he had noted earlier.

“No one can compare to Xiao-laoshi. Perfect face, perfect eyes, perfect cheekbones, perfect…”

“Wang Yibo!!!” Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes and walked away.

Zhoucheng stood there, astonished at the exchange he had just witnessed. He was both bewildered at the unexpected bickering and at how Yibo’s behavior was the opposite of what he had expected. He stared as Yibo followed Xiao Zhan and continued muttering words that drew another exclamation from Xiao Zhan and then eventually a slight pinch to Yibo’s side causing Yibo to shriek.

* * *

As the day progressed, the scenes went smoothly. Yibo had to mostly sit in silence and respond to Wei Wuxian’s antics with various glaring expressions. Xiao Zhan on the other hand, had way more dialogs when Lan Qiren questions him, when he rebels back, and when the Wen clan members barge in and insult them. He also had to display Wei Wuxians mischievous personality in a variety of expressions, ranging from smug to adorable. In one particular part of the scene, Lan Wangji notices Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang creating a disturbance during the lecture and turns to glower at them. 

As Yibo turned to look at the naughty duo, Ji Li embodied Nie Huaisang’s nervous and almost cowardly character perfectly and appeared flustered before turning away to avoid Lan Wangji’s stare. Yibo kept his gaze fixed on Xiao Zhan’s back as he slowly turned around to meet Yibo’s gaze. In the practice run, Xiao Zhan had turned around and looked at him with a mix of guilt and shock before flashing a typical Wei Wuxian smile which according to Yibo was not too different from Xiao Zhan’s own naturally charming smile. 

_He is the perfect Wei Ying._ Yibo had thought then.

This time, in the actual take, Xiao Zhan turned around with the same expression but then instead of just flashing the signature smile, he tilted his head to the side and followed it up with an innocent wave of his hand as if he was excited to have Wangji’s attention.

Yibo was thrown off by the unexpected cuteness of the gesture and his eyes widened a little while his face also tilted involuntarily, mirroring Xiao Zhan’s own pose and a soft smile appeared on his face. 

“Cut!”

The director’s voice snapped Yibo out of his daze and he straightened himself. 

“Yibo…,” the director took a few steps towards the group and spoke gently, “watch your expression. Wangji won’t smile in this situation...he is angry at Wei Wuxian’s misbehaviour.”

“Sorry, Zheng-laoshi...sorry,” Yibo bowed.

“There are enough scenes in the second half of the story for you to gaze at Wei Wuxian with _that_ expression, Wangji!” The director chuckled and then went back to the cameraman, ready for the next take.

Yibo felt a deep hot flush spread from his ears to his face and through his entire body. 

_What was the expression on my face just now? Oh god...I hope it wasn’t something too embarrassing._

He had never been more grateful that he didn't carry the gene that gave the ability to turn red when blushing. He glanced at Xiao Zhan who was conversing with Ji Li.

 _How could I help it though._ Yibo’s thoughts continued. _That was such a cute wave! I need to get back at Zhan-ge for this!_

Behind the camera, the director smiled to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know how I'm doing and please do subscribe to keep up with my chapters! This is turning out to be more fun than I anticipated. I thought my well would run dry in a few chapters but the Yizhan content keeps me going!! 
> 
> Thank you for all the kudos and comments. Keep 'em coming!


	6. Not all my rooms are like this

* * *

The first two weeks of shooting went by in the blink of an eye. Or at least that’s how it felt to Yibo. He was having so much fun on set that he didn't realize when time went by. All the cast members were young and friendly. They had a lot of fun on set, talking, playing, joking.

But Yibo had the most fun with Xiao Zhan. Hitting him was his favorite past-time and as the days progressed, he had started taking more liberties with him. Even though most of his scenes were with him, he still spent all his remaining time with him even when he wasn't in the scene, even when they were eating or playing around, and even when they wrapped up for the day and retreated to their room. Somehow, he never got tired of him.

Now, he had to fly out to shoot another episode of a reality show he was a mentor in - Produce 101. There were a few more episodes left to shoot and he hadn't been able to avoid the overlap in his schedule. But he wasn't the only one juggling work. Xiao Zhan had also signed up for another drama show before he had been confirmed for the role of Wei Wuxian. And he had to jump between both sets as well. Yibo marveled at how Xiao Zhan was able to switch between what sounded like two very different characters.

Occasionally at night, he would help Xiao Zhan rehearse lines for the other show when they were bored of rehearsing their own scenes for the next day. He was amazed at how hardworking Xiao Zhan was. He practiced non stop. He memorized lengthy dialogues with ease. He grasped the emotion behind each scene no matter how complex it was. He was fast becoming someone Yibo looked up to.

As Yibo boarded the flight, he realized how he had constantly been thinking about Xiao Zhan and their time together since he left for the airport. He was also slightly bummed that he hadn't been able to say goodbye to him before leaving as Xiao Zhan had some late night scenes to film for the other show. As he sat in his seat, his phone pinged.

> _Zhan-ge: Have a safe flight._

Yibo smiled and began typing back.

> _Yibo: Thanks, Zhan-ge! See you soon._

* * *

Xiao Zhan smiled as he entered the room after the night shoot and kept his phone aside. He looked around the now empty room. Yibo's bed was still unmade and he contemplated leaving it as is but his urge got the better of him and he folded the blanket and straightened out the sheet neatly. Yibo had left his knick-knacks and personal blanket in the room. Xiao Zhan wondered why he didn't take them along if he carried them around to feel at home everywhere he went.

He lounged around on his bed, lazily scrolling through Weibo. A few minutes later, he stood up and got some water. A few more minutes later, he walked around the room reading the scene for the next day.

"I'm so bored!!" He exclaimed outloud.

Xiao Zhan left the room and walked around outside until he saw Liu Haikuan.

"Hey!" He rushed up to him eagerly. "What're you upto?"

Haikuan paused in surprise and looked back to see a smiling Xiao Zhan running his way.

"Uhh...nothing much," he mumbled. "Just headed to my room. Why?"

"Want to hang out?" Xiao Zhan inquired cheerfully.

"Oh!" Haikuan's eyes widened a bit. "After shooting all day and night, you still want to...hang out? Aren't you tired?"

"Not really," Xiao Zhan rubbed the back of his neck. "I mean I am tired but I just wanted to..."

"Xiao Zhan," Haikuan smiled and shook his head, "it's 1 am...go sleep!"

With that, he continued walking, leaving a pouting Xiao Zhan behind.

"That Yibo!" Xiao Zhan nearly screamed. "He has ruined me! What am I going to do for five days!"

* * *

When Yibo woke up in the morning, he saw five unread messages waiting for him.

> _Zhan-ge: Bo-di!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: What have you done!?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: You've spoilt me!!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I was so bored last night when I got to the room.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Come back soon.  
>  _

Yibo felt his stomach do a weird flip but chose to ignore the sensation. 

_Maybe I'm hungry._ He thought as he typed out a response with a smirk. 

> _Yibo: Morning, ge!  
>    
>  Yibo: Looks like someone was missing me last night ;)  
>  _

Almost immediately, he received a response. 

> _Zhan-ge: Yibo! Have some shame. Save all the flirting for the girls you'll be shooting with.  
>    
>  Yibo: ...  
>    
>  Yibo: Not funny.  
>    
>  Yibo: How come you're free right now? Thought you'd be knee deep in shooting.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Raining unexpectedly. Need to wait it out.  
>    
>  Yibo: That sucks.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It's beautiful though. There are three rainbows! I'll show you the pic when you're back. My data is not great here.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It's magical. _

Yibo sighed at the image of rain turning everything in that already beautiful location an even lusher green. For a moment, he also imagined Xiao Zhan standing under an umbrella, extending him arm out to catch the droplets, and breaking into a blinding smile. His stomach did the strange flip again and this time, Yibo couldn't ignore it. He sat up against the headboard and frowned. 

_What the hell is happening?!_

* * *

Xiao Zhan turned his attention to the rain once again. He had been standing under an umbrella for half an hour but was itching to run out and get drenched. Instead, he stretched his hand out to catch some of the refreshing droplets on his palm. Everything smelled like the first rain. The sheer fragrance made him picture Yibo standing next to him. He felt a gentle tingling in his chest. 

_Wow, Xiao Zhan. You've been spending way too much time with that kid._

Xiao Zhan smirked imagining how Yibo would have scowled on hearing him refer to him as a kid. On feeling his phone vibrate in the inner pocket of his robe, he quickly wiped his hand dry. 

> _Yibo: Gtg for now, ge. Take lots of videos and pics!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Good luck with your shoot, Bo-di. _

* * *

Yibo returned to his room at midnight after a long day's shoot. To accommodate him, the show had adjusted the schedule. But that meant, they had crammed a week's worth of shooting into five days. He barely had any appetite and just showered and crashed into bed. He left his lamp light on and turned on the TV as well, reducing it to the bare minimum volume. After a few minutes of scrolling through Weibo, he got uncomfortable with how silent the room still felt. He raised the TV volume by a bit but the gnawing feeling persisted.

_That's strange. This is how all my rooms are. Why does this one feel quieter?_

Yibo looked around the room and his eyes wandered to his left and paused on the window which was draped shut.

"Oh...," he bit his upper lip in realization.

_Not all my rooms are like this._


	7. Lean in more, lean in closer

* * *

Xiao Zhan woke up early in the morning to several unread messages.

> _Yibo: You've spoilt me too, ge!  
>    
>  Yibo: It's boring to be alone in this hotel room now.  
>    
>  Yibo: You have an early morning shoot today, right?  
>    
>  Yibo: Four more days, ge!  
>    
>  Yibo: Our cast is so much more fun than the one here.  
>    
>  Yibo: I miss the scenery too!  
>    
>  Yibo: But most of all...I miss the wonderful, honorable, incomparable, charming Xiao-laoshi!  
>    
>  Yibo: _😁😜😉😎 

Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes as he sat up to stretch. He shook his head to wake himself up, causing his hair to fall messily on his forehead. He began typing with one hand as he rubbed his eyes, trying to get rid of the lingering sleepiness.

> _Zhan-ge: Wang Yibo!! Are we starting this again?_ 😫  
>    
>  _Zhan-ge: And yes, more like super duper early morning shoot._ 😭 

Xiao Zhan kept his phone aside and got ready. 

_Four more days._ He thought.

Xiao Zhan ignored the uneasiness he felt at what that thought implied. Or at least he tried.

_It's normal to be close to your colleagues. I was close to many of band mates! But...counting down to when he'll be back. I'm sure it's just teasing. I'm bored and impatient for my fun roommate to be back! Nothing wrong with that! Stop overthinking this, Xiao Zhan. Arghhh! Why am I even feeling uneasy about this?!_

With a mild frown, Xiao Zhan left his room, mentally preparing himself for the hectic schedule that awaited him.

* * *

On the fifth and last day of his shooting at Produce 101, a very fatigued and drained Yibo crash landed on his bed. He was infinitely grateful that his TTXS team had decided to shoot his parts of three future episodes before his Untamed schedule began. That way, he didn't have to do any more juggling this week and for the next two weeks! He pulled out his phone and checked the details of his flight back to the Untamed location.

"It's at 5 in the morning!!" Yibo groaned out loud.

That meant that he would have to go on set as soon as he landed because his part of the shooting began at noon. First he would shoot the scene where Lan Wangji gets drunk for the first time at Gusu and then he would have to shoot the first fight with Wei Wuxian on the roof tops at night. That would go well into the night and Yibo could already feel how exhausting it was going to be.

He browsed through his WeChat. There were no new ones from Xiao Zhan since their last chat that morning. As he scrolled up their past conversations which were mainly made up of random texts about how their shootings were going, how tired they were, funny incidents that had transpired, and lots and lots of rainbow farts, he couldn't help but be happy that he was finally going back. Back to the peace of the mountain and lush jungle, back to the fun and friendly cast and crew, back to his room and his wonderful roommate that made him more comfortable and at home than he had felt in a while.

He turned over and dug his face into the pillow. Before he knew it, he had fallen fast sleep before he could even take a shower or have something to eat.

* * *

"Oh shit! Oh shit! Shit! Shit" SHIT!" Yibo darted about this room, throwing his belongings into the suitcase.

He had overslept and now had only fifteen minutes to get his things together and head to the airport, leaving him no time for anything else except a quick shower.

"I'm so fucked!!" He muttered under his breath as he rushed out of the room.

As Yibo went through the next few hours mechanically - almost nodding off during the drive to the airport, walking hastily through security and boarding, managing to get a nap in during the two hour flight, trying to keep himself together during the one hour drive to the location - he was barely a functioning human being when he entered his room. He had felt a faint sense of disappointment when Xiao Zhan was not at their room on his arrival but had no time to dwell on it as he was escorted hastily to hair and make-up, which took almost two hours, during which time he used every ounce of self control to not fall asleep.

_It's a good thing I have to behave drunk and sleepy in the first scene of the day._

"Wang Yibo!" He turned around to see a waving Xiao Zhan coming his way. "You're here!" 

Feeling the stretch of his own lips on his face, Yibo realized that he was smiling widely and genuinely for the first time in a few days. He felt his stomach flip once again, causing his smile to flicker a little but it had no time to turn into a full blown frown as Xiao Zhan approached him and immediately patted him on the shoulder.

"You won't believe what happen...," Xiao Zhan paused mid-sentence as he neared Yibo and Yibo saw deep concern take over his face. "Bo-di...you look tired."

"Just a little exhausted. The schedule at 101 was demanding, but I got some rest on the flight."

"Have you even eaten?" Xiao Zhan's concerned look turned into a stern frown.

Yibo looked down at his lap guilty and embarrassed.

Without another word, Xiao Zhan yanked Yibo up by the arm and dragged him to his own section of the dressing room. He kept his hold on Yibo's arm as he rummaged through his belongings. He pulled out a yellow packet and turned around to face Yibo, finally letting go of his arm.

"Here, eat this...now." Xiao Zhan ripped open the packet and shoved a biscuit in Yibo's face.

Too tired to fight and too thankful to resist, Yibo opened his mouth and bit into the biscuit. Xiao Zhan handed him the rest with a satisfied smile.

"You need to take better care of yourself, Bo-di," Xiao Zhan reprimanded him with a shake of his head.

"Sorry, Zhan-ge," Yibo replied, much to his own surprise. He was never one to apologize easily, even when he was in the wrong.

"There you two are," the director walked in looking relieved. "Come on, let's go. We have a lot to shoot!"

* * *

The scene was easy enough much to Yibo's relief. It didn't demand too much from him and his drowsiness actually worked in favor, making his expressionless, submissive, drunk appearance more believable. As the scene progressed, they got to the part where Wei Wuxian had to walk Lan Wangji to the bed as he leaned against him, barely conscious.

"You have no control Yibo, Lan Wangji is drunk. You have to lean more on Zhan-Zhan. Don't carry your own weight." The director called out. 

As Yibo followed his directions, he could feel his body press against's Xiao Zhan's side as his arm was slung around his shoulder.

"More...lean in more," the director continued as he watched them through the camera.

Yibo's face was now close enough to Xiao Zhan's to feel his warm breath on his own skin. He could feel a hot flush spreading from his ears to his face. He felt goosebumps on the back of his neck and down his arms. He gulped and gave a side glance at Xiao Zhan. Xiao Zhan appeared unfazed and was looking in the direction of the director, waiting for further instructions. Yibo looked down, willing himself to stop tingling wherever he was in contact with Xiao Zhan.

"That's better. Ready...camera...and action."

* * *

The fight scene was the last straw. By the end of the night, Yibo had no energy to do anything, not even sit in one place while his hair and make-up was removed. All he wanted to do was drag his body into bed and sleep for ten days straight. But Xiao Zhan had thwarted his plan. When Yibo walked in the room, Xiao Zhan was just stepping out of the shower, fresh-faced and silent. With a cough he sat down on his bed and gestured towards the table on the other side of the room. Yibo saw, much to his surprise, a warm dinner awaiting him.

"You better finish all of that."

Yibo nodded obediently and sat at the table.

"Have some too," Yibo spoke in between hasty bites.

"I've already eaten," Xiao Zhan replied as he continued reading the script.

"I don't like eating alone," Yibo whispered almost inaudibly.

Xiao Zhan looked up and gazed at Yibo for a few seconds. The boy didn't look back at him and just keep eating, although his pace was a little slower now. He smiled and walked over.

"But I didn't get extra chopsticks," Xiao Zhan said as he took the seat beside him.

"We can...share," Yibo finally looked up and extended the chopsticks towards Xiao Zhan.

With a gentle shake of his head, Xiao Zhan took the offered chopsticks and sampled the dish.

They ate in silence, with Yibo picking up his pace once more, occasionally handing over the chopsticks to Xiao Zhan to take another bite. When the food was done, Xiao Zhan walked back to his bed and Yibo, feeling energized, went in for a shower. When he came out a few minutes later, Xiao Zhan was already tucked in. Yibo noticed that he had turned off his own lamp but left Yibo's lamp on. The TV was also turned on and kept at a low volume. 

Yibo smiled as he got into bed, a warm feeling spreading across his chest. He lay down on one side, facing Xiao Zhan who was tucked in once again like a spring roll. He seemed to have already fallen asleep. Without realizing it, Yibo kept gazing at his face and his eyes wandered from the hair falling over his eyes, to his small nose, his lips that were settled into a relaxed position, and the mole beneath them.

When Xiao Zhan stirred a bit, Yibo froze. Horrified, he realized what he had just been doing and he quickly turned to his other side, his heart pounding and his mind descending into chaos.

_What the hell. What the fucking hell._


	8. All your movements are so in sync

* * *

Xiao Zhan rushed to the room as soon as the drunk Wangji scene was done. His hair and make-up takes significantly lesser time than Yibo's because of Yibo's elaborate hairdo and headpiece and he was never more grateful for it then now. As soon as he was inside, he shut the door and leaned against it, letting out a long exhale.

 _What the fuck is going on?!_ He groaned inwardly.

With a sigh and a shake of his head, he walked over to the bathroom and took a long shower. Right when he emerged from the bathroom, Yibo walked into the room and they both halted in their tracks.

Xiao Zhan took one look at Yibo and his mind immediately went back to the scene they just shot. He had been caught off-guard when the director had instructed Yibo to lean on Xiao Zhan to the point that they were mere inches from each other's faces. He could feel a wave of heat rise up his body and had turned away in his nervousness and confusion. He had kept trying to distract himself by looking around until the director had yelled 'action'.

Now, Xiao Zhan's eyes landed on Yibo's face and he was reminded of how soft his cheeks had been when they had lightly grazed his neck as they proceeded with the scene. Yibo kept falling against him as a very convincing drunk Lan Wangji. The softness had been even more obvious and endearing when he lay Wangji down and patted his cheeks to check on his state. As soon as the director had yelled 'cut' and expressed his satisfaction with the scene and announced the end of that day's shoot, Xiao Zhan had nearly run to hair and make-up and then actually run from there to his room.

 _This is really silly!_ Xiao Zhan scolded himself. _It's not like I've never physically interacted with someone before. We played around so much during our X-Nine days._

Xiao Zhan coughed to break his own train of thoughts as he threw his towel over a chair and then sat on his bed. He turned the TV on and then, without turning to look at Yibo, gestured towards the table on the other side of the room. 

"I ordered you some dinner. You better finish all of that."

* * *

The next morning, Xiao Zhan woke up first. It was going to be another long day. But before shooting, the director had asked both him and Yibo to come see him for an important meeting. Xiao Zhan was starting to feel anxious, fearing the worst.

_Is he going to tell us we are not doing a good job? No it can't be. Yibo is perfect as Lan Wangji._

With that thought, his eyes roamed over to a sleeping Yibo who was all tangled up in his blanket. He turned the TV off and walked over to switch off the bathroom light. Then, he paused at Yibo's bed and hesitated for a bit. He leaned forward and shook the lump gently.

"Yibo...," Xiao Zhan spoke, softly at first, "wake up."

No response.

"Yibo...," Xiao Zhan's voice grew louder, "It's 6 am..."

Not even the slightest movement.

"Yibo!" Xiao Zhan exclaimed and shook him a little violently. "Aaahh!!"

Xiao Zhan yelped in shock as a hand emerged from the sheets and grabbed his. Yibo turned onto his side, dragging Xiao Zhan's arm with him until it was gripped between his cheek and the bed.

"No...," Yibo mumbled in his sleep, "not getting up." 

"Yibo...uhh...," Xiao Zhan was stumped when Yibo nuzzled his hand. with his soft cheek

"Five more minutes," Yibo opened his eyes blearily and then closed them again.

Xiao Zhan gulped and tried pulling away only to have Yibo hold on tighter and further swallow his hand between him and the bed.

Xiao Zhan paused and then smirked. He leaned forward until his face was hovering over Yibo's ear. Carefully, he blew a cold puff of air at the ear, eliciting an irritated moan and a shake of the head. He backed off a little and then repeated the action once more. This time, Yibo swatted at his ear and just as Xiao Zhan had hoped for, woke up with a jolt at the self slap.

Yibo's eyes opened wide and he blinked a couple of times seeing Xiao Zhan's face in front of him.

"Zhan-ge...?"

"Yibo, we need to meet Zheng-laoshi! Wake up!

"Oh...," Yibo cleared his throat and lifted his head up a bit, inadvertently coming closer to Xiao Zhan's face.

"Yibo..." Xiao Zhan whispered softly, maintaining eye contact.

"Ge...," Yibo replied huskily, his brain not fully functioning yet but his heart waking up at the closeness of Xiao Zhan.

"Could you please let go of my hand now?"

With yet another start, Yibo dropped Xiao Zhan's hand and sat up straight.

"Sorry! Sorry, Zhan-ge...I...," Yibo began stuttering.

"Who knew that cool guy Wang Yibo was a cuddler!! I know what I'm gifting you for your birthday. A soft teddy bear for you to cuddle with so you can spare my arm," Xiao Zhan smiled mischievously and was rewarded by a pillow to his face.

* * *

"Ah, boys! Come on in," the director gestured to them with a wave of his hand.

Yibo and Xiao Zhan walked into the room and Xiao Zhan shut the door behind him.

"Have a seat."

They sat down on the couch side by side and waited silently, both biting their lips, both nervous.

"No need to be scared," the director chuckled as he observed them in amusement, "I didn't call you here to reprimand you. But I do want to discuss something important."

With a sigh of relief, both boys relaxed a little and sat comfortably on the couch. The director laughed and shook his head.

"All your movements have been so in sync. It's interesting," he grinned. "Anyway, here's the deal. Gradually, we're going to start shooting scenes that are further ahead in the story line. And by this point of time...Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian have known each other for a while...and their relationship has developed too."

Both Yibo and Xiao Zhan nodded simultaneously and looked at each other from the corner of their eyes. As soon as they noticed their heads bobbing in sync, they let out an amused laugh, finally seeing what the director meant.

"We will keep that in mind, Zheng-laoshi," Xiao Zhan spoke.

"But that is not all...," he seemed to hesitate, "...have either of you read the novel?"

Xiao Zhan felt himself freeze. Before he could say anything, Yibo spoke.

"Yes, we have. We're familiar with the original story and their relationship," Yibo said with ease.

When Xiao Zhan turned to look at him, he was taken aback with the slight smile on Yibo's face. Not a smirk, not an embarrassed smile. Just an easy, relaxed smile.

_How is a boy six years younger than you so comfortable with this and you are close to blushing just at the mention of the novel. Get it together, Xiao Zhan!_

"Good, good," the director smiled back. "It's good that you're comfortable with it. Makes my job easier. Although a lot of those emotional and intimate scenes will be shot in July, I need to you to keep that aspect of their relationship in mind when shooting from now on. We will not show their true love," he paused for a bit, "thanks to the censorship rules. But I want to keep an undertone that hints towards their journey to each other and the evolution of their feelings. Does that sound alright? Any questions?"

"As long as you're directing us and guiding us through the scenes, I think we'll be okay," Xiao Zhan responded with an exhale.

"Of course. It's not going to be easy, I know. But you both seem to...," he looked at Yibo and then Xiao Zhan with a serious expression, "...have already gotten really close. I'm glad..." 

"How can one not like Zhan-ge," Yibo turned to face Xiao Zhan and nudged him in the shoulder with a smirk, "Zhan-ge is so great, Zhan-ge is so kind, Zhan-ge..."

"Yibo!" Xiao Zhan pushed him away and rolled his eyes. "Are we starting this again."

The director watched silently as the two began bickering and hitting and pinching and playing with each other, lost in their own world, always maintaining a point of contact. A smile slowly spread across his face and he took a sip of his tea, satisfied.


	9. Is sitting next to each other not enough

* * *

That night, the cast was done early and Yubin suggested they go out for dinner. It had been just over three weeks and everyone had become close and enjoyed each other's company. Excited at the prospect, they immediately began dispersing to freshen up and get ready.

"Where's Zhan-Zhan," Xuan Lu inquired all of a sudden. "Someone should inform him of the plan," she said glancing at Yibo.

Yibo nodded and was about to leave when he heard Ji Li speak up.

"So where are we going?"

"Let's go to a hotpot place," Yibo suggested before anyone could respond.

"Sounds good to me," Ji Li replied and everyone nodded as they made their way to their rooms.

* * *

"There you are," Yibo said as soon as he entered the room. "We were looking for you. Get ready...we're all going for dinner!"

"Oh...I think I'll pass...," Xiao Zhan replied in a dull voice.

"What's wrong?" Yibo walked over to where Xiao Zhan stood by the window and leaned against the window sill beside him.

"Nothing...guess I'm just tired," Xiao Zhan turned and leaned his back against the window sill as well.

"That's not it...you look upset," Yibo prodded.

"It's just...," Xiao Zhan sighed, "you're going to laugh..."

"I won't. I promise," Yibo tilted his head and gave Xiao Zhan a gentle smile.

"I...I miss my cat," Xiao Zhan pouted and dropped his head dejectedly.

Yibo felt his smile grow wider. His stomach did a flip for the umpteenth time in the last three weeks and he had long given up trying to understand or even stop it.

_How cute can he get!?!_

Instead of the 'aww' that he was tempted to let out, Yibo slid closer to Xiao Zhan.

"You're homesick...it happens. Come to dinner with me...us I mean...it'll take your mind off this. And I know it will cheer you up," Yibo added with a grin.

"How can you be so sure," Xiao Zhan narrowed his eyes at Yibo suspiciously.

"Because we're going for some hotpot."

Sure enough, Xiao Zhan's eyes lit up.

"Hotpot!?! I've been craving some for a while now!"

"I know...," Yibo smiled. "That's why I suggested it."

"Aww!! Bo-di...always so caring and kind," Xiao Zhan teased.

Yibo blushed and look away pushing away Xiao Zhan's nudges.

"How can I not? I have to take care of the elderly, do I not?" He smirked.

"How sweet of you. It's enough for me that Wang-laoshi thought of me!" Xiao Zhan placed his hands on his chest dramatically.

"Do you want to come or not?" Yibo attempted to put on his trademark poker face as he began walking away.

"Yes! Wait up...Bo-di," Xiao Zhan called as Yibo made his way to the door. "I want to come!"

* * *

They sat next to each other at a big booth, Yibo on the outside, Xiao Zhan beside him, and Yubin beside Xiao Zhan. The clatter and clangs of cutlery, gentle simmering of the broths, and cheerful chatter surrounded them. Opposite them, Liu Hai Kuan and Zhu Zan Jin sat side by side. As the dinner progressed, Yibo noticed Haikuan and Zanjin's interaction. At first he didn't pay much attention but then, when Haikuan pulled out some meat and vegetables from the hotpot and placed them in Zanjin's bowl, Yibo did a double take.

Later, they drew his attention once again when Zanjin nudged Haikuan and smiled as he suggested that Haikuan try the kimchi. Something in the smile, sent a tickle up Yibo's spine. Amused, he glanced at Xiao Zhan beside him but he was completely engrossed in the food, too ecstatic to care about anything else. Smiling affectionately, Yibo took out his phone and typed a quick message. As soon as he pressed send, Xiao Zhan sat up abruptly. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out his phone. Yibo watched him as he read the text he had just sent.

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge! Don't make it too obvious...and don't look at them immediately after you read this...  
>    
>  Yibo: But you gotta check out Haikuan and Zanjin's interactions...!! _👀🤫🤭🧐 

Xiao Zhan took in a deep breath and counted till three. Then, he left his phone on his thigh and took another bite from his steaming bowl. Carefully, and as nonchalantly as possible, he looked ahead and rested his gaze on the two targets of his investigation. Soon enough, Zanjin whispered something in Haikuan's ear, prompting the latter to let out a soft laugh, nodding in response. Haikuan then leaned sideways and whispered something back, covering his mouth with one hand.

Xiao Zhan looked down once more and typed quickly.

> _Zhan-ge: Wow.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Okay...I can't put a finger on it...but something seems...different_ 🤔😶 

Yibo grinned and replied.

> _Yibo: I know, right?!  
>    
>  Yibo: It's almost like they're a couple in love! Maybe they're...flirting?!_ 😳👨❤️👨 

Yibo felt Xiao Zhan choke a little on his food and suppressed a chuckle. He felt Xiao Zhan nudge his leg under the table.

> _Zhan-ge: Yibo!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: How can you say that? Are they...gay?_ 🙀 

Yibo froze. He hadn't even thought of it that way. Not knowing, how to respond, he put his phone aside and continued to eat. Noticing the change and lack of response, Xiao Zhan wondered if he had said something wrong.

> _Zhan-ge: I didn't mean it like that...in a bad way...  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I was just...you know...wondering... _

When Yibo didn't check his phone, Xiao Zhan nudged him under the table again. Clearing his throat, Yibo picked his phone up and held it under the table above his lap.

> _Yibo: I just...I guess I don't think of those labels.  
>    
>  Yibo: I just said what I saw - two of our friends behaving like they're on a date._ 🤷 

_I've never thought about it in that way._ Xiao Zhan smiled and pondered over Yibo's message. _Why the need for labels?_

> _Zhan-ge: Wang-laoshi is so wise. I always learn so much from him_ 🤯🤓👏👏👏 

On reading the message, Xiao Zhan received a sharp elbow to the side. Seeing him jerk a bit, Yubin turned to look at him.

"Everything ok, dude?" He inquired.

"Yep," Xiao Zhan smiled as he rubbed his side. "Just enjoying the food."

"Are you both..." Yubin noticed the phones on both their laps, "texting each other?!"

Neither Xiao Zhan nor Yibo responded but just stared at him blankly, their eyes shuttling between each other and Yubin's confused face.

"Is sitting next to each other not enough?" Yubin started giggling as he shook his head. "If I didn't know any better, I would think you're a lovesick couple!"

Xiao Zhan and Yibo looked at each other with a deadpan expression, then at Haikuan and Zanjin, then back at Yubin. Immediately, they put their phones in their pocket and resumed eating their food quietly.


	10. You would have done the same for me

* * *

After shooting some scenes with Lui Hai Kuan the next day, Yibo walked back to the room and was about to open the door when he heard Xiao Zhan talk. He couldn't hear anyone else so he assumed Xiao Zhan was on the phone. Not wanting to disturb his conversation, Yibo began walking away when the mention of his name caught his attention.

"Yes, ma! Wang Yibo..."

Yibo moved closer, placing his ear against the door.

"Yes, we're roommates..."

"No, it's not troublesome, ma..."

"It's only the fourth week of shooting but I feel like I've been living here for months. It almost feels like home," Xiao Zhan spoke excitedly.

"We all get along well, ma. Don't worry...it's nothing like the situation with...Wajijiwa," his voice dropped to an almost sad tone.

Yibo pressed harder against the door as Xiao Zhan's voice grew softer.

"It's alright, ma...I'm managing. Thankfully, my other drama's shooting is also happening near by, so I can take a taxi. And sometimes, Zhang-ge sends me his car..."

"Zhang-ge ma, Zhang Ruo...remember? He is my co-star in Joy of life...he has been very kind."

"No...," Xiao Zhan sighed, "Wajijiwa hasn't paid me yet..."

Yibo's eyes widened.

"I'm not famous enough to need security, ma," Xiao Zhan chuckled. "Yes...yes...I know you see all the other stars with bodyguards...even Yibo has one...two I think. But your Zhan-Zhan isn't that famous," he sighed, feigning disappointment.

"Thanks, ma...with your blessings...one day I will...for now, I just need to power through this phase with Wajijiwa. It helps that I'm having such a good time here. It's a good distraction. I don't think I've ever laughed this much. Yibo makes me laugh till my sides hurt. Sometimes my sides hurt because of how much he hits and pinches me..."

"No, ma...he doesn't hit me like that. Ma! We just play around a lot!"

Under any other circumstance, Yibo would have laughed at that part of the conversation. But his head was filled with a hundred questions about the problems Xiao Zhan was having. As he heard Xiao Zhan say his goodbyes to his mother, Yibo quickly turned around and went to the lobby. He opened his phone and sent a text.

> _Yibo: Hey, bro. What's up? Have a few minutes?_

Yibo waited patiently, hoping the person would reply soon so that he could have a phone conversation with him. Sure enough, a few minutes later, a reply came.

> _Yan Xujia: Hey, Yibo-ge! Going good! How are you?  
>    
>  Yan Xujia: Yeah, I have some time. What's going on?  
>    
>  Yibo: Can I call? I have some questions about...Wajijiwa. It'll just take a few minutes...hopefully. _

* * *

"Thanks, Xujia. Also, can this stay between you and me? You know Zhan-ge can be too nice for his own good and he probably wouldn't like that you told me all this."

"Great...thanks...I appreciate it, bro. Bye."

With that, Yibo closed his phone. What he thought would be a five minute conversation, ended up taking twenty minutes. It took him ten more minutes to process the information given by Xujia - all the drama with Wajijiwa and how much Xiao Zhan was going through. The sheer thought of him struggling, fighting to come audition on his own, taking taxis, paying out of pocket and so much more, made him clench his jaw in anger. With a deep exhale, he made up his mind and made a few more phone calls. Finally, he made his way back to the room.

As he entered, he noticed Xiao Zhan was standing by the window, staring at the sky. Yibo felt a sudden urge to go hug the man. He was taken aback by it. He was never one to initiate physical contact that easily, although he loved it, almost needed it, once he was very close to someone. He found it comforting.

_Do I really feel that close already with Zhan-ge?_

Then, remembering the conversations he had just had and thinking about the conversation he was going to have, he shrugged knowing very well what the answer to that question was. He fought the urge to pull Xiao Zhan into a warm embrace and walked in casually.

"Zhan-ge! Sorry, I'm late."

"Yibo...," Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes, "You don't have to apologize to me...I'm not your mother."

Yibo smirked and stood beside Xiao Zhan, gazing at the sky as well. It was a new moon night and even though there was no elegant full moon, the stars were more than enough. Yibo stared around, looking for his lonely star, the one with the other lonely star close by. As his eyes wandered the night sky, he felt a pair of eyes watching him. He turned to see Xiao Zhan looking at him thoughtully.

"What's the matter, ge? Something on my face?" Yibo patted his face to check.

"You tell me what the matter is? You seem restless."

Yibo marveled at how well Xiao Zhan understood him in just under a month. He took a deep breath and then turned to face Xiao Zhan.

"Okay, I'm just going to come out and say it. I heard you talking to your mother on the phone. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to eavesdrop. I was coming in when I heard you talk about me and then I was concerned about the remaining things you said...with Wajijiwa." Yibo blurted all in one breath.

Xiao Zhan's breath hitched and Yibo noticed his body stiffening. Once again, he was tempted to pull him closer to offer him some comfort but his better judgement prevailed and he continued talking.

"So...umm...I want to help...," Yibo looked away and rubbed the back of his neck, unsure how to proceed without making it sound like he pitied Xiao Zhan. The last thing he wanted to do was offend or demean him in any way.

Xiao Zhan remained silent, his eyes fixed on Yibo.

"...and it's no big deal. Hear me out before you reject it. My management has given me a car here and two bodyguards. The only time I need the car is to go to the airport or when we all go somewhere to eat. You can use the car the rest of the time to travel to and from your other shooting. And you can take one of my bodyguards whenever you need one. After all, Zhan-ge is about to get very famous," Yibo grinned.

Xiao Zhan didn't say a word and neither did his eyes move from Yibo as he spoke hastily. Yibo began to squirm under the firm gaze.

"Zhan-ge, please don't be angry. I'm sorry I overheard your conversation. And I really don't mean to upset you in any way. I just...I just want to help and it just so happens, that I can without any extra efforts. Zhan-ge...are you mad?" Yibo was almost pleading.

After what seemed like an eternity, Xiao Zhan finally shifted his gaze from Yibo to the night outside. He stared at one particular star and pointed to it.

"Do you see that star? Over there to the right...the one that seems alone?"

Yibo followed his finger and nodded when he saw the one Xiao Zhan was looking at.

"Whenever I would get upset about this shit, I would play one of my favorite songs and find that star. Somehow, I could relate to it. I felt just as lonely as it looked. And I would wish that I had someone I could talk to about this stuff. Like really talk to. Just open up and whine and rant and get it all out," Xiao Zhan tilted his head to look at Yibo, remaining silent for a few more seconds. "Thank you."

Yibo froze. At first at the words. And then at the star he was looking at. As his eyes skimmed to its left, he saw another lonely star near by. The two lonely stars that shone brighter together.

"Look, ge. Look to its left. There's another one next to it. They're alone...together," he turned to look at Xiao Zhan and met his tender gaze.

Xiao Zhan looked at the two stars, not the ones in the sky but the ones in Yibo's eyes, his heart beating faster. His own eyes held tears that had welled up at Yibo's words and actions but that he was unwilling to let flow just yet. He was tempted to give him a long tight hug but instead, he gave Yibo a gentle smile and slowly placed his hand on Yibo's. He gave it a light squeeze and then withdrew it again.

"Thanks, Bo-di. I'm glad we met. I really am."

Yibo's stomach did the biggest flip he had ever felt yet and he could feel his heart soar and drop as Xiao Zhan placed his hand on his and then took it away. His mind wanted to analyze and understand every emotion he was feeling but his heart just pushed it all aside and made him stay in the moment.

"Me too, Zhan-ge. And I know you would have done the same for me."


	11. Message me when you reach

* * *

"YIBO!" Xiao Zhan marched into the make-up room, startling everyone. "What have you done!?"

It had been two days since their heartfelt conversation. They had stayed up all night as Xiao Zhan poured his heart out to Yibo. He spoke of his journey from being a designer to competing on X-Fire to joining X-Nine despite the management's lack of interest in him, boosted solely by public votes, to his decision to pursue acting to all the current issues. He spoke of how he was contemplating taking legal action and possibly even setting up his own studio to help promote himself and handle his career better.

Yibo had spoken his heart out as well. Talking about his trainee days, living away from his family from a young age, getting judged by people for being too aloof, the incident where some fake fans threw red paint on him, his fear of the dark, and how he struggled to keep one foot in the industry when Uniq had to be shut down because of the ban between China and Korea. Xiao Zhan heard everything with eyes wide open. Never had he imagined, that someone who had been trained for this industry from a young age would still face so many obstacles.

Despite the lack of sleep that night, they were refreshed, energized, at peace and very happy the next morning, feeling like a giant load had been lifted off their shoulders. Today, on the other hand, Xiao Zhan was far from at peace. 

"It was you, wasn't it?" A very flustered Xiao Zhan approached a very smug Yibo.

"Yes," Yibo nodded.

"Yibo! Are you even human? The shooting is next week. I have only a few days to learn the choreography. With both my dramas, I can only rehearse by squeezing time in between shots! And you know dancing is not my strength. What were you thinking!?"

"One of the celebrity guests dropped out in the last minute and they asked me if I had someone in mind. Obviously, I thought of you. Come on, ge! It will be fun...and great exposure. You have way more dancing experience than any of the other guests. And you'll only be doing a tiny part of the choreography. AND I'll help you learn it!" Yibo jumped out of his seat and shook Xiao Zhan by his shoulders.

"Fine!!" Xiao Zhan sighed. "Don't blame me if Produce 101's ratings drop because of me!"

Yibo grinned and then gulped as he once again fought the urge to pull Xiao Zhan into an embrace. It had become a frequent urge since that night and Yibo had just accepted it the same way he had with the stomach flips.

_Who wouldn't be affected by this gorgeous man._ Yibo's grin widened at the thought. 

* * *

"Okay, again...," Yibo instructed, "1 2 3 4...what's next?" He waited for Xiao Zhan to remember the steps on his own. "Yes...5 6 7 8...good. See it's not so bad, right?"

"Easy for you to say. You took one look at the video and memorized the whole thing. I've literally only learnt 8 counts. That's not even a few seconds given how fast this song is!" Xiao Zhan pouted.

"Zhan-ge! What did I tell you? You're a good dancer and you work hard. You will get it. And if you were trained like me since a young age, you would have been just as good as me. Now dance! Next set...1 2 3 4..."

And so it went between every take. Yibo counting slowly at first and then fast. Xiao Zhan concentrating and following his lead at first and then doing it on his own. Of course, these sessions were interspersed with random sparring sessions that ended either in a giggling fit or pinches and smacks. One time, they caused such a ruckus that the director had to personally shush them. After that, they apologized profusely and behaved much better for the rest of the day.

In three days, Xiao Zhan had learnt his part of the choreography and the rap section he had to sing. Feeling better, he sighed in relief as he lay down after a long day. Yibo emerged from the shower and began packing just as the sun was setting. He would be leaving again to shoot for TTXS and 101. Xiao Zhan could feel something in his chest sink ever so slightly at the thought of Yibo leaving, but he was excited at the prospect of shooting 101 with him in a few days.

"Got everything?" Xiao Zhan inquired when Yibo zipped the bag. "Wallet, ID, medicines? Band-aids for all your new cuts and bruises?"

"Yes, ge," Yibo rolled his eyes and then smirked. "Ge is so kind and caring, takes such good care of me. Ge has such a big heart..." 

"Yibo! Shut up," Xiao Zhan exclaimed and threw his pillow at him. 

Yibo caught the pillow with a grin but a little too late to stop it from hitting his face nonetheless. It smelled of the same fragrance as Xiao Zhan's shirt, but once again he couldn't pinpoint what the fragrance was of.

"What time do you leave?"

"Flight's in a few hours. I'll leave in some. Just waiting for the driver."

"Hmm."

Yibo looked to the side to see Xiao Zhan lost in thought. A tiny part of him wondered if Xiao Zhan was upset about him leaving.

_Does he miss me when I'm gone. Just a little bit, maybe? Does he think about me and our time together a lot when I'm gone. Like I do? Don't be stupid, Yibo. Friends don't do that...not as often anyway! Either way...I'll be seeing him at 101 in a few days!_

Yibo's phone pinged and Xiao Zhan turned to face him.

"He's here," Yibo muttered, standing up with a groan and picking up his bag. 

Xiao Zhan stood up too and approached Yibo with an extended hand which Yibo took and they clasped hands and bumped shoulders.

"Take care, Bo-di. Message me when you reach," Xiao Zhan uttered the words before he even knew he would say them.

Yibo's eyes widened a little but then they lit up and a smile stretched across his face.

"I will, ge."


	12. Even the blind can see how handsome he is

* * *

> _Yibo: Where have you reached, Zhan-ge?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Bo-di...like I said ten minutes ago...I just left the hotel. I'll be at the airport in an hour and a half. And then will land after three more hours. And then will be at the 101 accommodation after one more hour.  
>    
>  Yibo: Sorry, ge! I'm just really excited.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: _🤦  
>    
>  _Zhan-ge: Me too, bo-di_ 😄  
>    
>  _Yibo: Get here soon. Your smile is better than that emoji's.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Don't start, Yibo.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Otherwise I won't come_ 😏  
>    
>  _Yibo: Nooooo! Zhan-ge! I won't start. Just come. I want to show you my routine.  
>    
>  Yibo: And I want you to meet my students. And meet Tao-ge!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Fine, fine. I'll meet everyone. Can't wait to see your routine! The amazing dance king of Asia!  
>    
>  Yibo: Now who's starting?_ 🤨  
>    
>  _Zhan-ge: Ha! Sorry. Okay, I want to take a nap, Bo-di. It's a long drive.  
>    
>  Yibo: Okay, ge. Take some rest. So you're fresh when you get here.  
>    
>  Yibo: I have three days worth of troubling you to catch up on!_ 😎 

Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes and put his phone back in. With a yawn, he let his head fall to one side and before he knew it, he was drifting off with a smile on his lips.

* * *

Xiao Zhan trudged up to his room with Yibo's bodyguard trailing behind carrying his bags. Xiao Zhan had told him several times that he need not do that. But the man had only smiled kindly and picked up the bags anyway. After he set the bags down, the man bowed and left. Xiao Zhan yawned and stretched and looked at the time.

_1:20 am_

Xiao Zhan fell backwards onto the bed and bounced on it a few times. He kicked off his shoes and scooted backwards and unlocked his phone, He opened WeChat and sure enough, there was an unread message from Yibo.

> _Yibo: Message me when you reach your room._

The message was sent half an hour back. Xiao Zhan didn't want to wake Yibo in case he had fallen asleep, which he hoped he had given how late it was. He groaned as he stretched once more and wrapped himself up in the blanket, not bothering to change or shower. Before he could settle in completely, the sudden sound of a door being thrown open gave Xiao Zhan a heart attack. He looked ahead to see Yibo marching through a door different from the one he had entered through.

"Cool, right?" Yibo smirked. "Our rooms are connected." Yibo stood by Xiao Zhan's bed, looking at him gleefully.

"Yibo! You could have made my heart stop with that shock!" Xiao Zhan sat up and rubbed his chest, still calming his racing heart.

"Sorry, Zhan-ge!" Yibo leaned forward and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay? I didn't think..."

Yibo paused mid-sentence as he felt Xiao Zhan's heavy breathing still calming down slowly. He looked at the alarmed eyes still settling down. He felt the hot body beneath his still cooling down. In that moment, he had the strongest urge yet to pull Xiao Zhan into an embrace and comfort him. With his wide big eyes and mouth partly open revealing his rabbit teeth, Xiao Zhan looked like an innocent bunny caught in the headlights.

With a cough, Yibo pulled back and sat at the foot of the bed.

"Sorry, ge..."

Xiao Zhan shook his head, finally snapping out of his initial shock. He managed a smile and slid up to sit beside Yibo.

"It's nice to see you, Bo-di," Xiao Zhan nudged Yibo playfully.

Yibo grinned and turned to face him, lifting one knee on the bed.

"I got us dinner. I knew you'd just want to go to bed. And you don't like airport food. You've probably just been having tea, right?" Yibo frowned.

"That's...pretty accurate, actually," Xiao Zhan gasped inwardly at how well Yibo had gotten to know him.

Then, Yibo's words sunk in with a lag thanks to his exhaustion and it was his turn to frown.

"Yibo...have you not eaten yet? It's past 1 am!"

"I just got off work two hours back, so I thought I'd wait," Yibo rubbed the back of his neck. "You know I don't like..."

"...eating alone," Xiao Zhan completed the sentence, shaking his head and sighing. He smiled and looked up a surprised Yibo. "I know you well too."

* * *

The next morning, a very nervous Xiao Zhan went on the 101 set to meet his team. Yibo had prepped him last night about everyone and everything he needed to know for the shoot. They wouldn't be interacting with each other on camera since the Untamed shooting was still ongoing and the show was being kept under wraps for now. 

The team was led by Meng Meiqi who was the best dancer and the main vocalist. The rest of the girls were also very very good and Xiao Zhan was petrified that he would ruin their performance. He had gone over the choreography so many times with Yibo after dinner that Yibo himself had asked him to stop, saying it was enough.

As the time for their performance approached, the butterflies in Xiao Zhan's stomach turned into a whole zoo. While the performance before his was going on, he excused himself to go the bathroom. He paced the small room, speaking words of encouragement to himself, when he stopped in his tracks as the door opened and Yibo entered, dressed in black skinny ripped jeans and a black shirt with small red flowers and hearts on it, with the top button left open to reveal his collarbone. 

His hair was styled with the just-out-shower wet look and had been colored a dark mahogany brown. This was the first time Xiao Zhan was seeing Yibo all dressed up in a modern setting in person. Complete with his hair and make-up, he looked every inch of the star and idol he was born to be. If Xiao Zhan was to be honest with himself, Yibo kind of took his breath away and for a brief moment, he forgot all about his nervousness.

"I knew you'd be here, ge," Yibo spoke quickly, unaware of the effect he had just had on Xiao Zhan. "I don't have much time, I have to go get ready for my performance. So I won't be sitting there during yours. But don't be nervous! I just came to tell you that you're going to be great."

As Yibo said these words, neither realized that he had stepped very close to Xiao Zhan and his hands now held on to Xiao Zhan's elbows. Xiao Zhan was the first to realize when he tried moving his hands to rub them together as his nervousness returned. When the realization hit them both, Yibo let go of Xiao Zhan's elbows and took a step back slowly.

"Alright, ge. I really have to run now. But don't forget what I said! You're going to be awesome. Don't forget to have fun!"

With those words, Yibo dashed out just as quickly as he had appeared, leaving a dazed Xiao Zhan behind. Xiao Zhan followed in his steps a few minutes later and felt ready to get on stage and dance his heart out.

* * *

The performance had been spectacular. Yibo cheered from backstage as he watched Xiao Zhan on the monitor. He had the biggest smile on his face when Xiao Zhan began rapping.

_Fuck. He sounds so good when he's rapping. And his attitude's on point!_

The camera then followed them off stage and interviewed the team. When asked about Xiao Zhan, the girls started fawning over him but one of them started off by saying that initially she didn't think Xiao Zhan was good-looking but when she saw him in person, she realized just how handsome he was. Xiao Zhan played along and even pouted at her words but Yibo clenched his teeth as he watched.

"Is she blind?!" He exclaimed at the monitor, throwing his arms in the air. "Even the blind can see how handsome Zhan-ge is!"

"That makes no sense." One of the girls in his team called out and snorted.

"This girl is the one not making any sense!!" Yibo responded before thinking.

Only on hearing the giggles did he realize how his little outburst must have appeared to the people who hadn’t seen this side of him. With a flush, he cleared his throat and joined his team, ready for their performance.


	13. And you say you aren't a baby

* * *

"I'm so glad that's over," Xiao Zhan sighed and leaned back against the couch. "Our flight's in four hours, right?"

"Oh...," Yibo pursed his lips, "about that...I had to cancel my ticket. I have to go back to shoot another episode for TTXS. There was some mix-up in the scheduling and my agent wrongly booked my ticket back to our shooting."

"What!? That's...," Xiao Zhan exclaimed but then hesitated, "fine...I guess I'll see you in a few days?"

"Yeah...three," Yibo masked the disappointment in his voice. "They adjusted my schedule in such a way that my presence in the May episodes was the bare minimum. But now I have to make it up by 'giving them more Yibo' in June, as Han-ge put it," Yibo smirked. 

"Of course," Xiao Zhan clasped his hands together in feigned excitement, "everyone wants a piece of the famous, handsome, cool, deadly Wang Yibo!!" Xiao Zhan smirked back.

"Of course," Yibo gave him a deadpan expression.

Xiao Zhan chuckled and stood up to start packing. 

"So what have they planned for you in those episodes?" 

"Lot of dancing actually...," Yibo stood beside Xiao Zhan.

"Oh wow. More dancing? I'm sure the girls will go crazy!"

"And guys too."

"Huh?" Xiao Zhan did a double take but then retained his composure, "Of course guys too! Everyone loves Yibo!"

"No! I mean...," Yibo lightly smacked Xiao Zhan's arm, "I will be doing duets with girls...so the guys will be going crazy too. It will be a treat for everyone!"

"Oh...," Xiao Zhan's hands paused for a fraction of a second and then he went around the room gathering and packing the rest of his things, "That's nice."

"Yeah, I guess," Yibo replied as he sat down, oblivious to the slight change in Xiao Zhan's tone. "It's just...the choreography is really easy."

"What do you mean?" Xiao Zhan exhaled and returned to the bed where his bag was kept. 

"It's more of a couple-y kind of dancing. Just fluff. And one of the girls isn't even a dancer from what I hear. So we're keeping it simple."

"Oh...will you be teaching them too?"

Yibo looked up this time, catching something in Xiao Zhan's tone. 

"No, won't have the time for that," he spoke slowly, his eyes following Xiao Zhan. "I'll just be flying in, practicing, shooting, and then flying back out...to you."

Xiao Zhan looked up at the words to see a smirking Yibo and he couldn't help but roll his eyes. 

"Wang Yibo! I am so honored. All those pretty girls and you have chosen our precious Untamed set to return to!" Xiao Zhan smiled mischievously.

 _That's not what I said._ Yibo thought as he bit his lips. _Why did I say that, though! It sounded so much like flirting._ Yibo choked and descended inot a coughing fit at the preposterous thought.

"Hey...are you alright?" Xiao Zhan leaned over and patted him a few times on his back.

"Yep...totally...fine...," Yibo managed to spit out in between coughs and he patted his own chest to calm him down.

_So. Totally. Not. Fine._

* * *

The few days passed quickly by as Xiao Zhan juggled both his drama shoots. On the day Yibo was due to arrive, a new TTXS episode was aired. Excited, Xiao Zhan ran back to the room after dinner and got comfortable in bed. He turned the TV on just in time as the episode began.

Although Xiao Zhan didn't like Yibo's styling, he looked cute in his now blue hair. The episode was entertaining. Xiao Zhan had a lot of fun watching Yibo's reactions to the antics of all his brothers. Then, they began teasing the young girl and Yibo, making them stand beside each other.

Xiao Zhan felt a tiny knot in his stomach which he promptly ignored. His lips flattened into a straight line as he continued watching. Eventually, the pair performed together. Even Xiao Zhan had to admit they looked cute together.

Having had enough, Xiao Zhan turned the TV off and crossed his arms across his chest. He got up and began tidying the room. After half an hour of tidying, he felt the knot subside. Satisfied, he went in for a shower. When he came back out, Yibo was already in the room sitting at the foot of his own bed, lost in his phone.

"You're back!" Xiao Zhan smiled as he dried his hair and quickly put on his shorts. 

"Hmm," Yibo sighed up and looked at him with tired eyes. 

"You look like shit," Xiao Zhan announced.

"Hmm...," Yibo blinked thrice, his eyes finding it hard to open up again each time.

"You look like a little baby right now," Xiao Zhan giggled.

"I'm not a baby!"

"Okay, okay, you're not a baby. Now go to sleep. We have an early morning tomorrow."

"Hmm...," Yibo fell back and didn't move.

Xiao Zhan had to physically drag him up the bed and remove his shoes and socks and tuck him in.

"And you say you aren't a baby...," Xiao Zhan smirked at the sleeping boy. 

* * *

"I don't think that's a good idea," Yibo stuttered as he looked at everyone at the lunch table. 

"Why not?" Xiao Zhan asked. "The movie has great reviews and for once, we all have half the day off today! We can go for a nice dinner and then watch the movie. It'll be fun!"

"Nice? How in hell is a horror movie 'nice'?!" Yibo asked in disbelief. "That does NOT sound like fun!"

"Wang Yibo...," Yubin narrowed his eyes, "Are you scared of horror movies?" 

Gasps and giggles emanated from all sides of the table and Xiao Zhan looked at Yibo.

"Are you?" Xiao Zhan asked, amused. 

"Yes!" Yibo blurted and straightened his posture. "I am not embarrassed of it. I hate horror movies. I don't want to watch this one."

"But we really wanna watch this one!!" Everyone spoke back in unison and giggled some more.

"Fine, but I don't think I'll join you guys then," Yibo shrugged. "I'll just come for dinner." 

"Come on, Bo-di," Xiao Zhan whispered as everyone resumed eating their lunch. "You're not going to be alone. We're all going to be there with you."

"You don't understand," Yibo whispered back. "It's not just that I'll jump at every scare and scream while watching...I'll also be terrified once I'm back in the room and for the next several nights!"

Something in Xiao Zhan's chest warmed at the sight of Yibo explaining his weakness innocently. It was endearing to say the least and Xiao Zhan fought the urge to pull his cheeks. Before he knew what he was saying or doing, Xiao Zhan placed a hand on Yibo's thigh and squeezed it gently.

"Even if I'm there in the room?"

Yibo froze at how intimate and comforting those words sounded. He gulped and nodded meekly.

"Okay, ge.


	14. I'll be right here

* * *

_A horror movie was a bad idea._ Xiao Zhan thought as he watched Yibo shrivel and shrink further into the couch.

They had all decided to watch Gonjiam in the common lounge at the end of their floor. They were only thirty minutes into the movie and Xiao Zhan was already regretting convincing Yibo to watch it. The poor boy had jumped thrice already and screamed once even though nothing scary had really happened. With every jerk, Yibo retreated a little more towards him. Yibo was sandwiched between Xiao Zhan and Hai Kuan but now, as Xiao Zhan noticed, there was a growing gap between Yibo and Hai Kuan.

 _Enough for Zan Jin to fit in._ Xiao Zhan couldn't help but think with a smirk.

Zan Jin, as Xiao Zhan had noted in the beginning, was sitting on the floor in front of Hai Kuan and now had somewhat shrunk back as well until he was almost leaning against Hai Kuan's knees. But Xiao Zhan had his own shriveling baby to think of. As the next half an hour went by, Yibo was pressed against Xiao Zhan so firmly and closely that Xiao Zhan could feel the tremors going through his body.

_He's literally shaking. The poor boy! This is all my fault._

"Yibo," Xiao Zhan spoke as softly as possible so as to not disturb anyone. But it still drew a yelp from Yibo who flinched out of fear. "It's me...don't be scared...do you want to leave? You don't have to watch this if you're this...affected by it."

Yibo looked like he was contemplating the option for a second, before he looked at Xiao Zhan and asked softly, "Will you leave too?"

_He probably doesn't want to be alone. It's fine. I can watch this some other time._

"Of course, Bo-di," Xiao Zhan said.

"Then no," Yibo shook his head.

"Huh?"

"I know you really want to watch this. We can stay."

Xiao Zhan couldn't tell whether it was his tone, his thoughtful gesture even when he was being tortured, or whether it was the way he had clumped them together with the 'we', but something made his stomach flip. It was a strange feeling. 

"Do you want to," he leaned in and whispered really close to Yibo's ear. "hold my hand?"

Yibo looked at Xiao Zhan carefully as if trying to decide if he was joking or not and then slowly, hesitantly nodded.

With a kind smile, Xiao Zhan, who was sitting to the right of Yibo, adjusted himself so that he could hold Yibo's right hand with his right hand, and threw his left arm around Yibo's shoulder. Gently, he patted Yibo on the shoulder but then froze for a second when he felt Yibo intertwine their fingers where they held hands. He glanced at Yibo who didn't seem fazed and had resumed watching the movie. Within a few seconds, however, Yibo jumped again and clasped Xiao Zhan's hand tightly.

Xiao Zhan chuckled inwardly and shook his head. In turn, he tightened his grip around Yibo and massaged the back of his hand with his thumb. He focused on the movie again, ignoring the way his heart was racing.

* * *

If he wasn't so terrified, Yibo would have probably felt his stomach flip several times for reasons other than the scary movie. But the only time, he felt like that was when towards the end of the movie, a big scare happened that nearly killed Yibo. He flung his head away from the screen, right into Xiao Zhan's neck, folding his entire body into him, clinging on for dear life. 

He only realized what he had done when he felt the familiar smell again. The one that always lingered on anything Xiao Zhan touched. As soon as he realized, he knew he should have pulled away. And he would have if he wasn't so damn petrified. Or maybe not. Either way, he stayed there for the rest of the movie and when it was finally over, he felt Xiao Zhan trying to get his attention.

"Yibo...it's done." 

"Is it really over, ge?"

"Hmm...," Xiao Zhan nodded, trying his best not to move at all, something he had been trying to keep not doing ever since Yibo had flung himself at him.

"Can someone please turn the TV off?"

"Hmm," Xiao Zhan lifted his chin at Hai Kuan who quickly stood up and obliged. "It's off."

"Can someone turn the lights on, please?"

Zan Jin rushed and did so.

"It's on Bo-di...you can...get up now."

Slowly, painfully slowly, Yibo unfolded and detached himself from Xiao Zhan. By the time he straightened himself and began breathing normally again, most of the others had left. Only Hai Kuan and Zan Jin remained.

"Is he going to be okay?" Zan Jin asked worriedly. "He seems...mortified."

"Yeah...I shouldn't have forced him to...," Xiao Zhan turned to place a hand on Yibo's shoulder, "Sorry Bo-di...I shouldn't have..."

"Can we go back to our room, ge?"

Xiao Zhan nodded and stood up. All four of them made their way down the corridor. Xiao Zhan bid goodnight to the other two and walked into the room, with Yibo trailing close behind. Somewhere along the walk, Yibo's hands had found Xiao Zhan's again and he had felt too guilty to do anything about it.

Once inside, Xiao Zhan made Yibo sit on his bed and went about turning on all the remaining lamps including the bathroom lights. He turned the TV on to make sure there was some background sound.

"No...I don't think I want the TV on tonight....it'll make me think of..."

Xiao Zhan swallowed his guilt at Yibo's almost numb, shaky tone. He obliged and then went and stood in front of Yibo.

"Let's leave all the lights on tonight, how about that?" Xiao Zhan forced a smile.

Yibo nodded meekly and moved back on his bed until he was leaning against the headboard. For the next several minutes, Xiao Zhan tried his best to distract his friend with conversation and jokes but nothing worked. Yibo just sat there fiddling with his fingers and the blanket. Finally, Xiao Zhan stood up and sat by Yibo on his bed.

"What can I do to help you sleep?"

Yibo looked up at him slowly and bit his lower lip, unsure and hesitant.

"Tell me, Bo-di. Anything.

Yibo took a deep breath, "Can you...will you...sleep next to me?"

Xiao Zhan had expected something like that but it still made his breath catch a little with hesitation. Nonetheless, he nodded. Yibo let out a relieved exhale and lowered himself under the blanket. He held it up, looking at Xiao Zhan questioningly. 

"I'm fine," Xiao Zhan said as kindly as he could, "It's too hot for me anyway." 

He tucked the blanket around Yibo and half-lay half-sat against the headboard as he settled beside Yibo. Yibo bit his lips for a second as if he wanted to say something, but then nodded and relaxed. Xiao Zhan turned towards him and rested his hand on Yibo's chest.

"I'm sorry," Xiao Zhan spoke after a long silence, on noticing Yibo still wasn't asleep, "I shouldn't have..."

"You didn't," Yibo let out a half smile much to Xiao Zhan's relief. "I'll be fine."

"Okay, good...I'll be right here," Xiao Zhan smiled brightly and involuntarily alternated between massaging Yibo's chest and patting it, like he would do to his own cat. 

Eventually, Yibo's breathing settled into a steady rhythm and he was fast asleep. Xiao Zhan yawned and closed his eyes for just a second, relaxing his head against the headboard.


	15. If they could see him like this

* * *

Xiao Zhan jerked awake as he felt himself slipping off the bed. He caught his breath as his heart raced at the sensation of falling down. He looked around, confused for a moment, before remembering where he was. He was on Yibo’s bed, partially laying down beside him, and his hand was cradling Yibo’s neck.

 _When did my hand move there?!_ Xiao Zhan thought in horror as he pulled his hand back hastily to his chest as if he was burned.

His panic subsided when he saw Yibo’s sleeping face. As he tried to retreat slowly, he felt a small tug on the hem of his shirt. He looked down to find Yibo’s fingers clutching the fabric. He looked up again but Yibo was still asleep. A warm smile spread across his face and he decided to stay.

He let his eyes admire the serene face for a few moments before placing his arm under his head and neck.

 _Guess no one can escape Yibo’s charm. Maybe this is why all his TTX brothers and other mentors adore him so much. It’s only natural to be in awe of him. If his fans could see him like this, they would fall even more in love with him, if that’s even possible._ Xiao Zhan chuckled.

With his gaze fixed on Yibo’s face, Xiao Zhan felt himself drift off into a calm reverie until he was fast asleep.

* * *

When Yibo’s eyes flickered open in the morning, he was facing the ceiling. With a sigh, he turned onto his left side but then froze when his nose bumped into something. He arched his head back to get a better look and his eyes widened when he realized it was Xiao Zhan’s chest that he had inadvertently bumped into.

His gaze wandered from the chest that was rising and falling gently with each breath to the face that was propped up on an arm. Xiao Zhan seemed to be fast asleep given the way his lips were slightly parted. Yibo felt his breath catch in his throat at the sight. 

_If the public thinks Zhan-ge is the most handsome man in Asia now, I don’t know what they’ll think if they could see him like this._

Yibo let out a slight frown as he noticed Xiao Zhan’s posture. 

_He dozed off here in that uncomfortable position. I shouldn’t have asked him to sleep next to me._

Slowly and carefully, Yibo slid off the bed, not wanting to disturb him. He took a quick shower and stepped out of the bathroom, feeling lighter and giddier at the same time. Xiao Zhan was still asleep but had spread himself across Yibo’s bed in a more comfortable position. Yibo smiled at the memory of Xiao Zhan massaging his chest as he tried falling asleep after being scared witless.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo knelt down by his bed.

”Zhan-ge...wake up…,” Yibo gently shook his arm. 

Receiving no response, Yibo extended his hand out towards Xiao Zhan’s face but then hesitated. He bit his lip and then continued moving his hand forward. Ever so gently, he placed it on Xiao Zhan’s cheek, letting his fingers graze the smooth skin lightly. He felt goosebumps spread up his arms all the way to his neck.

Xiao Zhan moved a bit and Yibo pulled his hand back with such haste, that he fell back onto his ass.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo steadied his voice and spoke as casually as he possibly could, “Finally! You’re awake. It’s 7 am, ge...we have to be in hair and make-up by…”

”Bo-di?” Xiao Zhan interrupted him with a dazed look on his face.

Something stirred inside Yibo on hearing the deep, husky, sleep filled voice. 

_Oh god...I didn’t think his voice could get any sexier than it already is._

”Ge…good morning,” Yibo spoke softly.

Xiao Zhan blinked a few times and then his lips stretched into a never-ending smile as his eyes crinkled up into two half moons.

”Good morning, didi,” a still sleepy Xiao Zhan mumbled, continuing to smile at him. 

Yibo gulped at the term of endearment that Xiao Zhan was using for the first time. Xiao Zhan held his gaze for a few more seconds and then slowly sat up, rubbing his eyes.

”How are you feeling?” Xiao Zhan inquired once he had woken up sufficiently enough.

”Better,” Yibo smiled. “Now, go get ready.”

Xiao Zhan nodded lazily and headed to the bathroom, stumbling a little along the way. As Yibo watched him close the door behind him, he held his head in both hands and rested his elbows on his knees.

_Oh god. I have a crush on Xiao Zhan._

* * *

After a few days of shooting, Xiao Zhan was now at the location of his other drama. He had long breaks in between takes because he was not the main character in this show. So he had a lot of time off. As he was scrolling through his phone absentmindedly, he came across a video from Yibo’s latest TTXS episode.

It was a dance video and Xiao Zhan clicked on it eagerly. Much to his shock, although he shouldn’t have been surprised since Yibo had told him what the June episodes would look like, it was a duet with another girl. This time it was Cheng Xiao, who was a great dancer and the choreography was a bit more advanced. 

As Xiao Zhan watched, he felt a strange prickly feeling in his chest. Every time Yibo made eye contact with her or came close, he held his breath. When the dance ended, Xiao Zhan bit his lips to erase his frown. He took a deep breath, and looked around to make sure no one was near by. 

Slowly, he typed out something and hit the search button. It took a few seconds since the data there was weak, but then several search results showed up. There were several videos of Cheng Xiao and Wang Yibo. Videos that shipped them - edits that claimed that Yibo’s attention was always on Cheng Xiao at Yuehua events, old footage of their dance rehearsals for various events, and an even older video of her performing with Uniq.

_Wow. They've known each other for years. No wonder they're close. He seems comfortable with her._

Xiao Zhan’s heart had skipped a beat when Yibo walked around stage holding her hand. His eyes scanned Yibo’s face and every micro-expression in each video. He didn't know what he was looking for. He found himself going down a rabbit hole with every suggested video until he somehow found himself watching a video of Yibo and Meng Meiqi with some edits of different shots from 101 and photos from their trainee days. Then, another video of Yibo popped up with Li Zixuan, another participant from 101.

Having had enough eventually, Xiao Zhan tossed his phone aside and leaned back on the chair, stretching his legs out, staring at the blue sky. After several seconds of silence, a small chuckle escaped his lips, which soon turned into a full blown laugh. 

_What the fuck are you doing, Xiao Zhan._


	16. You're the something on my mind

* * *

In a few days, it was time for Yibo to once again fly out for his other shoots. Even though it wasn't the case, he had begun to feel like he hadn’t been able to spend enough time with Xiao Zhan this month compared to May. And each time he returned, there were some new inside jokes that he was on the outside of. He gave himself comfort by remembering that he was shooting extra episodes for both TTXS and 101 and would thereafter have a continuous stretch of two weeks at the Untamed shooting.

One particular TTXS episode made him miss Xiao Zhan even more than normal. The guests for that episode were all artists and as they spoke and displayed their art, Yibo’s mind kept flitting back to Xiao Zhan and the stories he had shared from his design days. He had even shown him some photos of his paintings back home. Yibo remembered fondly the way Xiao Zhan had lit up when showing him the paintings, zooming in, explaining the techniques, what he wanted to convey, and then went on to show Yibo all his favorite artists excitedly.

Yibo tried his best to pay attention but he couldn't help it when his eyes kept wandering back to Xiao Zhan’s glowing face and bright eyes as he talked non-stop. It had taken all his will power to not lean in and take those busy lips and envelop them with his.

Yibo froze mid-shot as his mind went over that feeling. He pulled himself together enough to recover from the fantasy and finish the shot with his brothers. He was thankful he always stood at the end of the line up and didn’t usually talk much. His sudden freeze probably didn’t stand out as much. But it had stood out to someone and Yibo found this out when he was approached by Qian Feng in the dressing room.

”You okay there?” Qian Feng asked as he stood beside Yibo with a concerned look on his face. “You seemed a little...distracted out there.”

”Uhh…,” Yibo flushed, “Sorry, Feng-ge. I won’t let it happen again. I was just...I’m a little tired,” Yibo lied.

”Hmm,” Qian Feng narrowed his eyes on Yibo and spoke in a low voice, “You know you can talk to me if something’s wrong, right?”

”Yes, ge. Thanks,” Yibo smiled and exhaled in relief.

”Girl trouble?” Qian Feng smirked and nudged Yibo.

”No,” Yibo stiffened.

”You can tell me. Trust me, I have done all the mistakes there are to do. I’m sure I can help,” he grinned.

”No girl troubles, ge,” Yibo gave him a tight lipped smile. "Not even remotely."

”Ahh, alright alright. Should have known. Monk Yibo. So focused on work. No time for women, breaking hearts wherever he goes.”

 _If only you knew, Feng-ge._ Yibo cringed inwardly. _If only you knew._

He pulled out his phone when Qian Feng left and began typing a text.

> _Yibo: I’m ruining this episode 🙄😢_

Almost immediately, a reply came.

> _Zhan-ge: What happened? Are you alright?_

__

Yibo knew exactly what was wrong and what he needed. He needed Xiao Zhan. But for now, he would have to make do with Xiao Zhan’s attention.

> _Yibo: I don’t know. I’m so off my game today.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Something on your mind?  
>    
>  Yibo: You. _

Yibo bit his lips till they bled.He didn’t know what prompted him to be so bold but he was never good at hiding his true self. And he could already feel himself slowly unraveling ever since he woke up to Xiao Zhan’s sleeping face.

When he saw that Xiao Zhan was still online but had not replied, Yibo swallowed his urges and decided to do some damage control.

* * *

Xiao Zhan stared at the screen long and hard. His heart was in his throat. He could feel his heartbeat thunder in his ears. His entire body felt hot and cold at the same time. And he had no idea what he was feeling. He couldn’t distinguish or name all the emotions that swirled inside him. Seconds, maybe minutes passed and he still didn't know what to think.

 _Is he saying...what I think he’s saying._ Xiao Zhan bit his lips. _Am I...is this...am I blushing?! What’s going on! Why would he say this. Unless…_

Before Xiao Zhan could sort it all out in his head, his phone pinged again.

> _Yibo: You.  
>    
>  Yibo: 😏  
>    
>  Yibo: Zhan-ge is so handsome and charming, it’s hard not to think of him all the time. Zhan-ge is the best. _

Xiao Zhan felt his shoulders drop as he let out a breath he didn't realize he had been holding.

_Of course it was a joke. What were you thinking, Xiao Zhan!?_

On the other side of the texts, Yibo dropped his head on the dressing table and groaned.

 _Coward. Fucking coward._ He cursed mentally. _What’s the point, anyway! Xiao Zhan isn’t gay._

Yibo jerked up as if he had been stung.

_Oh. My. God. I’m gay._

He thought back to all the strange feelings and stomach flips and moments he had experienced over the last six weeks. And although it seemed obvious given his crush, he hadn’t thought it was anything more than mere infatuation until now. 

_I’m gay for Xiao Zhan._


	17. Where's the damn line

* * *

Xiao Zhan tossed and turned but could not get his mind to fall asleep. Unlike in May, he had seen Yibo for only half the time during these first two weeks of June. It frustrated him, how attached he had become to Yibo. He tried his best to find excuses to text him, updating him about the scenes, sharing tidbits of the antics on the sets so he wouldn’t feel left out. But nothing was enough. All Xiao Zhan really wanted was to have Yibo by his side the entire time.

He gave up and threw off his blanket in frustration. Not knowing what else to do, he pulled on a sweatshirt, slid into his shoes, and went out for a late night walk. It was a beautiful night, one of the many benefits of shooting on location. Xiao Zhan walked without a care for where he was headed, guided by the light of a blindingly beautiful full moon.

After what seemed like hours, Xiao Zhan took a break and sat down on the damp grass. He ran a hand through his hair, pondering over nothing in particular. And there it was again, the now familiar frustration. Never in his life had two opposing emotions existed simultaneously in his heart this violently.

He was happier, more joyful than he had ever been on any work related set, maybe even on a personal level. But he could also feel a constant frustration simmering just beneath the happiness. 

_Why am I frustrated when I’m this happy?! Everything is great, everything is as perfect as it can be...yet…_

Xiao Zhan groaned and lay back, placing his head on his arms. He stared at the night sky that was mostly dark and black and empty except for the one dazzling entity that was proudly displaying its brightness. Without warning, his mind conjured up an image of something else that shone just as bright, bright enough to make everything else seem dark and unimportant.

_No! Stop it, Xiao Zhan!_

He dragged both hands down his face and slapped his cheeks a few times.

_It’s great that I’ve become this close to Yibo so quickly. It’s great that I have a new best friend...someone who I can trust and confide in. But...where’s the...why does it feel like...why is it hard to see the line...where’s the damn line!!_

Xiao Zhan sat up and let out a long exhale.

 _You’re overthinking this._ Xiao Zhan thought as he frowned to himself. _Just go with the flow. There’s nothing weird going on, it’s all in your head._

Xiao Zhan reached into his pocket to pull out his phone and check the time.

_Crap! Where’s my phone!? Aaaand I’m not really sure where I am. Great!_

Xiao Zhan stood up and looked around, gulping down his nervousness.

_It’s fine. I’ll just retrace my steps. At least it’s a full moon and there’s plenty of light!_

Slowly, with unsure steps, Xiao Zhan walked back on what he thought was the way he came. Gradually, gaining confidence when he began recognizing landmarks, he broke into a jog.

_Damn...how long did I walk for!_

With a final boost, Xiao Zhan broke into a full sprint.

* * *

Yibo took two steps at a time as he made his up to their floor. He jogged to the room, excited to surprise Xiao Zhan by his early return. But when he pushed the door open, he was greeted by a silent room. Yibo pouted and put his bag down by his bed. He checked the bathroom, the lounge and the cafeteria, yet caught no sight of Xiao Zhan.

He tried calling his phone but there was no response. He did another round of all the spots just to make sure but once again, no Xiao Zhan. He went around the rooms of the cast, knocking softly since it was already quite late at night, to see if any of them knew where Xiao Zhan was. But no one answered his knocks.

Yibo came back to the room and decided to wait.

_He must be hanging out somewhere else. Wait, is he on the other location? No, he was just sending my photos of the cast fooling around this morning._

Yibo bit his lips as he paced around the room.

_Who could he be hanging out with at this time? Everyone is asleep._

A mild frown appeared on Yibo’s face.

_So what if he is hanging out with someone else. Maybe he was bored alone...or maybe...did he go out for a walk? That must be it._

The thought comforted Yibo a bit until he saw the time.

_12:34 am! Why would he be out so late...that too when we have an early morning schedule tomorrow._

Yibo tried calling Xiao Zhan’s phone again but once more, there was no response. He took a deep breath and decided to wait a little longer.

_You’re overreacting, Yibo. Zhan-ge is six years older than you. He’s fine._

Yibo shook off his growing anxiety and took a long warm shower. When he got out, there was still no Xiao Zhan. He tried calling his phone three more times. On the third failed attempt, he began to panic.

_It’s 1:10 am. Zhan-ge is not this irresponsible. Something must have happened!_

Without further thought, Yibo ran out the door. He made his way hastily to every spot he could think of in and outside the hotel, in the shooting areas, in the dressing rooms, the terrace; all to no avail.

He ran outside the hotel and paused, catching his breath. He looked in every direction hoping to see Xiao Zhan standing somewhere, lost in his thoughts. But there was no Xiao Zhan. His panic started morphing into extreme dread. 

As his mind began racing, so did his feet. Before he knew it, he was running down a soft path that led away from the hotel, lit only by the moon. He made his way on the path at neckbreak speed, looking in every direction, pausing only to catch his breath. 

Slowly, he had to take breaks more often and his head turned dizzy. Whether it was from exhaustion or anxiety, he couldn't tell. Feeling like his vision was blurring, Yibo rubbed his eyes. He thought he saw a figure in the distance. Afraid that his eyes were playing tricks on him, he rubbed them some more but the figure was still present and seemed to be getting closer fast.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo mumbled. “Zhan-ge!” He called out hoping he was right.


	18. I don't regret it at all

* * *

”Zhan-ge!”

Xiao Zhan thought he heard his name being yelled out in the distance. He quickened his pace, energized at the thought that he was almost there. Soon, he saw a blurry figure ahead. The trees were more dense in this section of the path and the moonlight that filtered through was dimmed and soft. 

He slowed down when a figure seemed to be approaching him. He squinted his eyes in an attempt to see who it was. The first thought that flashed into his mind was that it was some crazy fan who had somehow found him.

 _Don’t be silly, Xiao Zhan. You’re not that famous._ He chuckled to himself. 

The second thought that came to his mind, made him gasp and squint harder.

”Yibo…?” Xiao Zhan whispered in confusion and disbelief. “Is that…”

Before he could complete his sentence, Yibo’s figure became clearer as he reached within a few feet from Xiao Zhan. Both stopped in their tracks, panting and staring. Xiao Zhan, confused beyond belief that Yibo was here, standing in front of him. Yibo, relieved beyond belief that he had finally found Xiao Zhan and he was unharmed.

”Yibo...what are you doing here,” Xiao Zhan took a few more steps to bridge the gap.

Yibo took a few long, heavy strides and reached out and pulled him into a tight embrace.

”Zhan-ge!” He exclaimed as he tightened his arms around Xiao Zhan’s back.

Xiao Zhan was astonished and speechless at the sudden warmth that enveloped him. His arms hung awkwardly by his side.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo repeated, softly this time. “I was so worried.” Yibo whispered, clutching the back of Xiao Zhan’s sweatshirt.

Xiao Zhan’s entire body stiffened at the intimacy of the contact. He could feel Yibo’s entire body plastered against his. He couldn’t tell if the racing heart he felt pounding against his chest was his or Yibo’s. As if sensing his motionless body, Yibo froze too.

Both remained in the hug, frozen. All the warmth had left the embrace. Slowly, Yibo pulled back, gliding his hands off Xiao Zhan’s body. He kept his eyes down, too embarrassed to make eye contact.

Xiao Zhan was thankful that they were under a canopy that made it harder to see the other person clearly, otherwise Yibo would have seen the hot flush that had spread across his face.

_I wonder if he’s blushing too._

Even though Yibo had taken a step back, Xiao Zhan could still feel his heavy breathing on his own skin.

”Yibo...uhh...what are you doing here?”

”I should be asking you that,” Yibo coughed and Xiao Zhan could see him straightening his posture. “What the hell are you doing out here at this time? Do you have any idea how worried I was. I looked everywhere. It’s past 1 am, ge!! I couldn’t reach your phone! Where is your damn phone? Do you know how scared I was that something happened to you!?

With each word, Yibo’s pace of speaking increased and so did his volume.

”I just...needed some fresh air!” Xiao Zhan flinched at the harshness of Yibo’s words. “I’m sorry...I don’t know where my phone is...maybe I dropped it along the way.” Xiao Zhan looked down guiltily. “I didn’t mean to worry you. What are you even doing here?! You’re not supposed to be here until tomorrow morning.”

”We...we got done sooner than expected and I took an earlier flight.” Yibo’s voice calmed down. “I...I’m sorry for yelling. I was just…”

”It’s okay,” Xiao Zhan finally recovered from the shock of seeing Yibo and being hugged by him. “I would have been the same way if I were you,” he reached out and squeezed Yibo’s arm and smiled.

”You would?” Yibo’s heart skipped a beat.

”Of course, Bo-di. If you went missing, how are we supposed to finish shooting?” Xiao Zhan smirked.

”Let’s go back to our room,” Yibo slapped his arm in return, a smile slowly spreading across his face.

As they made their way back, talking, bickering, laughing, they never separated by more than a few inches - arms constantly brushing, shoulder to shoulder sometimes, hands grazing each other. Xiao Zhan felt each and every contact and had goosebumps all over by the time they reached their room.

* * *

Xiao Zhan tried to sleep that night, but his mind kept going over the sensation of Yibo giving him a full body hug. His heart warmed at the thought of Yibo feeling worried for him. But it also fluttered on remembering the heat that had spread through his body like lightning.

_It was the first time we hugged like that, and it was totally unexpected. Of course I would be taken aback and feel strange. Sleep, Xiao Zhan!_

Yibo also lay still as a rock, but his mind was a whole other matter. He could still feel the terror he had felt when he couldn’t find Xiao Zhan anywhere. The intense relief that had washed over his entire body on seeing him in that path. The deluge of emotions he had been swept away in causing him to jump at Xiao Zhan and pull him into an embrace, as if to make sure he wouldn’t vanish again. And then the hug.

He kept reliving it over and over again. His entire body trembled at the memory of Xiao Zhan’s warm body pressed against his. He had wanted to hold on forever but was yanked out of his bliss by the realization that Xiao Zhan had stiffened. Reluctantly, he had let go, mentally chastising himself for his actions.

_It must have made him so uncomfortable._ Yibo frowned. _No point regretting it now...do I though? Do I regret it?_

Yibo carefully turned over to his other side, to face Xiao Zhan who was fast asleep. He took a long look at the face and recalled how warm Xiao Zhan’s cheek and neck had felt against his.

_Nope. Don’t regret it at all._


	19. This should be enough

* * *

They all set off early in the morning to the location for that day’s scene. It was the penultimate scene at the end of the show, where Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian part ways. The location was an hour’s bus ride away and then a trek of about half an hour. 

From the photographs they had seen, it was a spectacular location. It was also where the last scene would be shot. It was totally worth the journey even with all the equipment and bags.

After the crew had loaded up the trunks of both the mini buses they were to take to the site, there were a few more bags and boxes left. 

”You can put some in the back seats,” the director suggested. “Seems like we have more items than people anyway.”

With those instructions, the crew loaded up the last items and then everyone filed into the buses. Xiao Zhan and Yibo got into the bus and sat together at the back.

”Are you sure you’ll be comfortable with all those bags piled up next to you? There’s barely any space for the two of you!” Yubin called out.

”They look comfortable, don’t worry,” the director replied before either Xiao Zhan or Yibo could say anything.

Once everyone settled in, the bus set off. The path up the mountain was more a lack of shrubbery than an actual road and the ride was very turbulent. Every few feet, they encountered potholes, bumps, and rocks that made the bus dance around. Yet, despite the shaking and jumping, somehow Xiao Zhan found himself drifting off. Before he knew it, he had slid down the seat and was leaning on Yibo’s shoulder, fast asleep.

Yibo looked down at the face resting against his neck and grinned slightly at the ticklish feeling of Xiao Zhan’s hair brushing against his skin. Carefully, he adjusted Xiao Zhan’s head on his shoulder. As he was pulling his hand back, he looked at the front of the bus. Everyone was facing ahead, mostly either sleeping or staring out at the landscape. Looking back at Xiao Zhan, he let his fingers slide over Xiao Zhan’s cheek, down to his chin, and then lightly grazing against the corner of his lips. He let his finger linger near them before sliding it ever so slightly until it was touching Xiao Zhan’s lower lip 

Yibo gulped and then reluctantly, pulled his hand away. He moved some strands of hair away from Xiao Zhan’s eyes and then with a sigh leaned his head back and closed his eyes. 

_There’s a line, Yibo. And this is where it should be enough._

* * *

The director walked to the back of the bus. Everyone had deboarded except Xiao Zhan and Yibo. When he got back inside the bus, his eyes fell upon the two of them - sound asleep, Xiao Zhan’s head resting on Yibo’s shoulder, and Yibo’s head resting on top of Xiao Zhan’s head. He smiled and made his way to them, but not before taking a quick photo.

”Yibo…,” he gently shook the boy’s shoulders. “Zhan-Zhan,” he said a little louder.

Almost immediately, Yibo opened his eyes followed by Xiao Zhan. And almost immediately after that, they tilted their heads towards each other and noticed their positions. The snapped up straight and turned their attention from each other to the director.

”Zheng-laoshi,” Xiao Zhan was the first to speak, “Sorry, did we oversleep? Have we reached?” Xiao Zhan looked outside the window more to avoid the director’s gaze than anything else.

”Yes, come on. Let’s go, you two.”

”Sorry, laoshi,” Yibo added hastily, rubbing the back of his neck.

”No need. You two looked cute...Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian couldn't look half as cute together,” he smirked in response.

Both boys were stunned at his words and with eyes wide open, sat there speechless.

”Come on now, hurry up!” The director called out as he stepped off the bus.

* * *

Despite the long trek and the shoot all day, spirits were high that evening as everyone set up camp. Much to their delight, the production team had set aside one day to explore the beautiful location. They were already there, might as well make the most of it. One bus returned with the people who would rather rest back in the lodging and the other one stayed for the ones that chose to camp out in the wilderness. 

With everything packed and the tents up and a fire going, a calm energy reigned. Everyone discussed the plan for the next day. Someone suggested a beautiful hike path that would take them to some of the most beautiful vista points along the mountain. Someone suggested another simple trek that would lead them to a lake. Yet another suggestion was made to just stay at the campsite and have fun and play games. And so it was decided that the next morning they would split into three groups. 

It was two to three people a tent given how many things they already had to carry with them. Everyone went into their tents ready to crash after the long day and excited for the next one. Xiao Zhan and Yibo were sharing one tent and much to Yibo’s joy, no one else would be sharing it with them. It was equal parts torture and equal parts thrilling to be in the same tent as Xiao Zhan.

 _Technically, this counts as us sleeping on the same bed._ Yibo thought with a smile.

”What are you smiling about?” Xiao Zhan’s voice interrupted his thoughts. 

”Umm...nothing. Just excited to be camping. I’ve never...camped before.” 

”Really?!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed as he rolled out his sleeping bag.

”Have you?” 

”Yep...several times...in school and then in college. It’s fun...I like being out in nature...away from the crazy world.”

”The world IS crazy,” Yibo muttered in a tone Xiao Zhan could not understand.

”Come on…,” Xiao Zhan gestured with his hand, “unroll your sleeping bag.”

”Hmm,” Yibo hesitated for a second and then did as he was told while Xiao Zhan zipped the tent entrance to prevent bugs from entering.

They lay side by side in silence like two burritos. Eventually, the campfire died down and before Yibo knew it, he was surrounded by darkness. His breath hitched. He hadn’t thought about this aspect of camping. There was no TV or night light to distract him.

He pulled out his phone to use as a light but it didn’t help. He bit his lips and looked at Xiao Zhan. He was fast asleep. Quietly, he scooched over to place himself closer to him in an effort to calm his nerves.

_Come on, Yibo. Don’t be a baby. Everything is fine. Just go to sleep._

But it didn't work. Yibo could feel his heartbeat in his ears. The familiar panic was rising and before he could rationalize his actions, he leaned over and held on to Xiao Zhan’s shoulder, which was the only thing jutting out of the sleeping bag. Xiao Zhan stirred at the disturbance and opened his eyes.

”Bo-di?”

”Oh...,sorry, ge,” Yibo loosened his grip but didn’t pull away. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

”Are you...scared?”

Yibo didn’t say anything but Xiao Zhan understood. He turned to face Yibo and in the darkness, Yibo felt both of Xiao Zhan’s hands unlatch his from the shoulder and then sandwich it between them.

”Better?”

”Hmm…,” Yibo nodded.

”Why are you so scared of the dark, Bo-di?”

”I...I think...it makes me feel very...alone.

Xiao Zhan’s heart flipped. Something arose inside him and without thinking, he sat up and got out of his sleeping bag.

”Get up,” he ordered as he went about unzipping both the sleeping bags. 

Yibo sat still in the dark as his barely adjusted eyes saw Xiao Zhan busy at work. He flinched a little when a hand reached out for him again.

”Come on,” he was pulled forward and it was then he realized that the sleeping bags were laid flat on the ground like a bed. 

He lay down and felt Xiao Zhan lay down next to him. Yibo felt his heart race when Xiao Zhan pull the other sleeping bag over them like a blanket. 

”Better?” Xiao Zhan whispered once he was satisfied with how he had tucked them in.

Yibo realized how close Xiao Zhan was and every fiber of his being wanted to drape himself over him and hug him close and never stop. 

”Yes. Thanks, Zhan-ge,” he took a deep breath and replied. 

Xiao Zhan held his hand and squeezed it tight. Very soon, Yibo heard his steady breathing and knew Xiao Zhan had fallen asleep, still holding his hand. Yibo closed his eyes and repeated four words over and over again until he fell asleep. 

_This should be enough._


	20. I can't tell if my heart is beating

* * *

Xiao Zhan woke up in the morning to an empty tent. Yibo had already left and Xiao Zhan was thankful because he didn't think he could have retained his composure any longer. All he had wanted to do all night was pull the scared Yibo closer and cuddle with him, caress his cheeks and hold him tight. Xiao Zhan sat up and stretched. He crawled out of the tent to see everyone gathered in one big group, discussing the plan. He saw Yibo separate from the group and run towards him on seeing him emerge from the tent.

”Zhan-ge! You’re up? So...which one do you want to do? The trek, the lake or stay?”

”Which one are you going for?” Xiao Zhan asked with another yawn.

”I can go for either,” Yibo rubbed the back of his neck and grinned. “Whatever Zhan-ge wants to do.”

”Even if I want to stay and do nothing?” Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow with a smirk.

”Yes.”

”You…,” Xiao Zhan scanned Yibo’s face for any signs of a joke but the boy seemed sincere, “would sit here...and not go on any of those amazing adventurous treks? You?”

”Yes.”

”That’s so unlike you, Yibo!”

Yibo knelt down in front of Xiao Zhan and in the most sincere tone he had ever heard him talk in, replied. 

”Zhan-ge, thank you for what you did last night. And for what you did when I was scared after the movie. I’m sorry. I ask you to do these things for me even when they make you uncomfortable like when I hugged you forcefully that night. You get uncomfortable and yet, you don't say anything. So yes, if you want to sit here and do nothing, I will sit here and do nothing with you.”

Xiao Zhan felt the back of his eyes heat up and he prayed to all the gods that the tears wouldn't fall. His heart warmed at the sincerity in Yibo’s words and he wanted to say a lot of things but none of those words made it out.

”God, Yibo! Warn a guy before saying such things!” He placed a dramatic hand on his chest. “It doesn’t suit you. Go back to being my annoying Bo-di! And stop saying thank you and sorry so many times!!”

”So...staying here then?” Yibo grinned and stood back up. 

”No…,” Xiao Zhan smiled back. “The lake.”

* * *

”Wow,” Xiao Zhan gasped.

”Wow,” Yibo nodded in agreement.

”I wish I had my camera,” Xiao Zhan sighed as he took in the beautiful scenery that lay before them.

”Didn’t find your phone yet?”

”No, and the new one will only come by tomorrow. Thankfully, I always back everything up.”

”Here,” Yibo handed Xiao Zhan his phone. “You’re a better photographer than me anyway.”

Yibo spent the next two hours following and admiring Xiao Zhan as he walked around the lake, finding all the interesting angles and views and clicking away happily, praising the scenery and the color palette and the lines and the proportions until all Yibo could do to stop himself from kissing him, was to interrupt him with a smack on the arm.

”Enough, ge!” Yibo grinned and asked for his phone back. “I think everyone is ready to head back...and you've almost killed my battery.”

”Oh,” Xiao Zhan rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Sorry, I get carried away.”

Yibo shook his head and laughed as he led the way back. Everyone chatted excitedly as they made their way back to the camp. The trek path was not a real trail but some crew members had asked one of the locals for directions and everyone had simply followed them. It was a leisurely trek and Xiao Zhan couldn’t help but stop every few minutes to coo at the sights. He grabbed Yibo’s phone from him, despite his protests that they were lagging behind, to click more photos. When they turned back to continue, no one was in sight.

”Uhh...shit.”

”Hurry, ge.” Yibo gestured as he jogged ahead. “They couldn't have gone too far.”

After several minutes of jogging, both of them paused and stared at each other. Then they looked in every direction but to no avail.

”I guess we were lagging behind by a lot,” Xiao Zhan scratched his head.

”You think so?” Yibo tilted his head and gave Xiao Zhan a sarcastic look.

”Sorry…,” Xiao Zhan’s face dropped.

”It’s...fine,” Yibo felt his heart melt at the cute expression, “I’m sure we can find our way back. It was pretty straight I think. And we have a lot of daylight left.”

”Yeah...and hopefully they’ll notice their two leads are missing,” Xiao Zhan laughed.

The two kept walking in silence and soon heard a sound in the distance.

”That sounds like a group of people, doesn’t it?!” Xiao Zhan perked up.

They raced ahead and within minutes came to the source of the sound but it wasn’t what they were expecting. It was a small gushing waterfall.

”Wow,” they both gasped in unison.

They stood there for a few minutes admiring the view, the sunlight bouncing off the water, tiny rainbows dancing amidst the spray, birds chirping in the distance. To Xiao Zhan, it felt like heaven. Out of nowhere, his reverie was broken when he remembered Yibo’s words from that morning. He glanced sideways at Yibo who stood still, mesmerized by the waterfall. He smiled to himself and stared at his feet for a few moments before making up his mind. Slowly, he turned to face Yibo.

”Yibo…,” he waited until Yibo’s attention was on him. “There was something I wanted to say this morning but forgot to.”

”What happened, ge?” Yibo smiled as his eyes alternated between the waterfall and Xiao Zhan.

Xiao Zhan placed his hands on Yibo’s shoulders and turned him towards him. 

”Hugging you doesn’t make me uncomfortable. Neither did any of those things I did.”

Yibo’s eyes opened wide and Xiao Zhan leaned in, wrapping arms around Yibo’s shoulders, and gave him a gentle hug.

”Uhh...ge…,” Yibo stuttered at first but then smiled and placed his hands on Xiao Zhan’s back.

It only lasted a few seconds but Yibo’s smile never left him as they pulled back.

”Don’t ever think that again, okay?”

Yibo nodded and they resumed walking. Yibo couldn't tell if it was day or night any more, if it was cold or warm, if he was smiling or crying, if his heart was beating or not.

As the day progressed, they threw each other nervous glances every few minutes, trying to keep their calm. All of a sudden they heard footsteps. Several of them. They began walking hastily in the direction of the sound and to their immense relief, saw a few of the crew members walking their way, along with the director.

”Where did you guys go!?” A very concerned Zheng-laoshi rushed up to them and placed his hands on both their shoulders. “Are you alright?”

”Sorry, laoshi. Somehow we lost track of the group. And then we couldn’t find our way back. So sorry to trouble you and make you worry, laoshi,” Xiao Zhan and Yibo bowed multiple times in apology. 

”It’s alright. I’m just glad you’re safe,” he smiled and exhaled. “As long as you two are together, it’s fine.”

* * *

On the bus ride back, Yibo pulled out his earphones and handed Xiao Zhan one of the ear pieces. He showed Xiao Zhan his playlists, letting him choose the song. Xiao Zhan scrolled down until he saw one he liked. He pointed to it and raised his eyebrows at Yibo who nodded and clicked on the song. 

_There’s nothing more I want now, I can’t even tell if my heart is beating.  
Rather than forceful conversations with others, I’d rather be in awkward silence with you.  
So stay, wherever that may be.  
Sometimes, when darkness comes, I’ll be your fire.  
In this world that is a lie, The only truth, it’s you.  
This a letter from me to you._

They hummed along, both smiling and staring out the window at the beautiful scenery that went by. Yibo smiled as he remembered Xiao Zhan's words and their hug.

 _He initiated that. Not me, he did. Because he wanted to. I can’t even tell if my heart is beating._ Yibo thought and smiled even more widely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The lyrics are from the song 'Stay' by Blackpink. There's a bts video of Yizhan singing this together.


	21. Who am I to you

* * *

They were halfway through the summer. And as the director had prepared them, the heavy scenes would start now. Yibo was thankful 101 was over and he had already shot a bulk of the July TTXS episodes so he could focus on the upcoming Untamed schedule. Although the shooting went smoothly, it was difficult for another reason altogether. Yibo hadn't anticipated the extent to which the director was willing to go, to show the blossoming love between Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian. Some of the scenes were so intimate that Yibo could barely walk straight afterwards - his heart a mess from staring into Xiao Zhan’s eyes for too long. 

When he had to hold on to Xiao Zhan’s arm when Lan Wangji realizes that Wei Wuxian has returned or stare into those chestnut eyes r when look at those lips play the flute for several takes so the team could get multiple angles, he had forgotten how to breathe. 

Every time he had to catch Xiao Zhan in his arms because Wei Wuxian was weak or injured, Yibo felt electricity zap all his muscles and he was sure he would, at some point, have a fit and faint from spazzing out. It felt so right to have Xiao Zhan in his arms. He fit so perfectly in his arms.

Like the time Xiao Zhan was laying in his arms in the boat, pretending to be unconscious, and Yibo had to do the entire scene in that position for multiple takes. Even in between takes, the director didn't want them to lose the flow or lose the perfect angle he had set them up for the camera. So that's how they stayed, for half the day. Not that Yibo was complaining, although his leg did at one point. Xiao Zhan had gotten up to give him a break, but Yibo had told him he was fine and pulled him back a few seconds later. He wasn't fine.

 _”Closer. Closer. Get more intimate.”_ The director had yelled across the set, prompting Xiao Zhan to hide his face in a blush and Yibo to smile uncontrollably at both the words and Xiao Zhan’s reaction. All he wanted to do was hide Xiao Zhan behind his flowing sleeve and kiss him senseless. He settled for just the first part. 

Every night when Yibo went to the room, his heart sank a little at the thought that the summer would be ending soon. But as soon as he would see Xiao Zhan’s smiling face, it would rise up and he would remind himself that what he had in the present was more than enough.

* * *

Xiao Zhan couldn't believe half the summer was already done. As the shoot continued, his mind had begun the countdown already, much to his own exasperation. But time seemed to slow down when he shot the intense scenes with Yibo, of which there were many. 

It was as if the director had waited for them to become close and then demanded that every ounce of those emotions be channeled into their characters. He would walk away from each scene, a little drained, a little shaken, and very conflicted.

When he had to take care of Lan Wangji when he got drunk for the second time, his heart had fluttered incessantly. Whether it was because of Yibo’s innocent expressions, his cute way of talking, his pouty lips, when he had to gently wipe his mouth when he spilled the water, or lay him down and place his hands gently together on the chest; he didn't know. Xiao Zhan felt time slow down till it would stop and linger around him and Yibo.

Every time he had to hold Lan Wangji’s hand to comfort him or hold his arm to stop him or grab his shoulder to hide behind him, Xiao Zhan would always walk away a little weak in the knees, much to his own confusion and frustration. 

The confusion reached its peak when they had to do the scene during the infamous hunt when Lan Wangji approaches Wei Wuxian in the jungle and starts trying to convince him to come to Gusu again.

 _”Who am I to you?”_ When Yibo said the words, Xiao Zhan had immediately screamed internally.

_I don't know! I don't know anymore!_

On hearing Xiao Zhan call him his soulmate and lifelong confidante, Yibo had looked him straight in the eye and Xiao Zhan could have sworn he had seen something in them that was real.

 _Don’t kid yourself._ He had thought after the scene. _You were shooting a scene. He was literally acting. Goddamn this character bleed! It will go away soon enough once we’re done with shooting!_

That night, Xiao Zhan was unable to fall asleep as his mind went over that last thought again and again. The summer would end soon. And the character bleed would end soon. And Yibo would move on and they wouldn't meet each other and live with each other like this, ever again.


	22. Come back, let me go

And then the day everyone had been anticipating came upon them. The day they were going to shoot the climax. The suicide scene after all the craziness had reached its peak and Wei Wuxian just crumbled and lost all will to live.

Yibo stood across from Xiao Zhan as finishing touches were put on their make-up and wigs. Xiao Zhan looked forlorn and completely hopeless at the other end as he was preparing for the scene. Yibo knew this was part of his process but still, seeing him that way made Yibo want to rush to his side and hide him from the world.

When the direction yelled action, Xiao Zhan’s tears that had been filling up his eyes for a while now as he waited patiently for the camera, fell slowly. Xiao Zhan let a few trickle out at first as he looked at the ground, dejected and alone. And then came the first dialog of that scene. Lan Wangji’s earnest plea.

”Wei Ying...come back…”

Xiao Zhan almost choked on his tears seeing the scared helpless eyes that stared back at him. He wanted to run to Yibo and yell that he wasn’t going anywhere, that he didn't want to go anywhere, that he would never go anywhere.

And that did it. That’s when he let himself come undone and let the tears flow freely. The camera came closer and closer but all he saw was Yibo’s terrified face waiting with bated breath for Xiao Zhan to come back.

”CUT!” A sharp yell stunned both Yibo and Xiao Zhan out of their emotions. “That was perfect! Let’s get the next scene up and going.”

With a sharp intake of breath, Xiao Zhan began reeling his tears back in. He didn't move. He didn't look up. He just waited as the crew put his harness on for the next part of the scene.

Yibo watched as Xiao Zhan unravelled in the scene and then shrunk into himself, coiling inwards after the director called cut. He began walking towards him when he was approached once again by crew members to touch up his hair and make-up, to adjust his costume, to mark his next positions. And before he knew it, they were onto the next shot.

Yibo readied himself for his run but he wasn't ready for what it felt like when he saw Xiao Zhan look up once again crying, closing his eyes in complete hopelessness and then slowly letting his body fall back, surrendering to the void.

Yibo’s heart stopped beating and he almost didn't have to pretend when he stretched his hand out to stop what was happening. His harness carried him forward, making him feel like he was flying. With just the right timing, he managed to grab a hold of Xiao Zhan’s hand as his body fell. Yibo could feel the strain in his arm where he held on to Xiao Zhan's wrist, as he was dropped to the ground.

Xiao Zhan let himself hang limp and lifeless as he kept his eyes shut, only allowing himself to feel the heat from Yibo’s tight grip on his wrist. He could feel Yibo’s heavy breathing above him and he didn't need to open his eyes to know how Yibo must be looking at him right now.

”Cut...” The director called out much to their relief. “I am so...you guys...did great!” They could hear the break in the director’s voice.

The crew helped Yibo up and got him out of his harness. Xiao Zhan, on the other hand, had to remain in his harness, hanging off the platform for the rest of the scene. Yibo got back on the ground and held onto Xiao Zhan’s wrist once more. 

Xiao Zhan managed to look up and give him a weak smile, which Yibo tried returning. At least they were in this misery together. And once it ended, and they were completely drained, they would recover together. 

When the shooting resumed, Xiao Zhan hung off the edge once more with the aid of his harness and Yibo grabbed onto him for dear life. Xiao Zhan looked up at him, the tears back, and a faint expression of happiness passed over his eyes, followed by affection, followed by dejection once again.

”Lan Zhan…,” he whispered with so much pain, “Lan Zhan...let me go…”

The words were not a request, they were a heartbreaking plea. A plea that Lan Wangji would never give in to, a plea that Wei Ying desperately needed him to grant him. Lan Wangji’s love was being tested. Would he give the love of his life what he so desperately wanted and needed and put an end to his endless misery or would he fight for him, even when he didn’t want to fight for himself, just to satisfy his own need to keep Wei Ying alive?

Yibo couldn't help but wonder what he would do in such a situation.

_What would I do if Zhan-ge asked me to let him go? Would I let him walk away? Would I fight for him? Would I fight for...us? Is there even an us?_

Xiao Zhan let the words slip out of his mouth slowly, begging his Lan Zhan to let Wei Ying die in peace. Something in him broke in that moment.

_Let me go. I don't know what is happening. I can't figure it out. I don't know what this is. What all these emotions inside me are. What you are. What we are. Let me go._

But when his harness let loose a little and Yibo jerked to catch him again and tighten his grip on Xiao Zhan, one look at Yibo flipped something else in Xiao Zhan too.

_Who am I asking to let me go? Do I want to be let go? Do I want to let go?_

When the director yelled cut this time, neither of them moved. Neither of them so much as blinked. The crew members began to come forward to adjust their harness and touch them up again but the director held them back.

”Keep the cameras rolling,” he said softly, “and give them a few seconds.”

Xiao Zhan looked into Yibo’s eyes. He let out a sad smile and more tears streamed down his face. Yibo held on to Xiao Zhan like his life depended on it, and on seeing the man unravel again, his own tears began flowing. Both looked at each wordlessly. Neither ready to let go just yet.

Xiao Zhan and Yibo realized the director had called cut when the director himself came over and very gently spoke to them. 

”Well done, boys,” he signaled to the crew members to lower Xiao Zhan to the ledge once more. “That was beautiful. But you need to take a break now.”

As the crew prepared Zhoucheng for his part, neither Xiao Zhan nor Yibo spoke. Yibo sat on the ground closest to the ledge Xiao Zhan was standing on, both as at peace in each other’s silent company as they could possibly be given how emotionally drained they were becoming. Once everything was set up, they took their positions again, Xiao Zhan hanging from the harness and Yibo clutching at him once more. Zhoucheng’s dialog was delivered, the sword was struck and Yibo jerked as Xiao Zhan yanked his arm away and let the harness take him down by a few feet.

 _That one wasn’t so bad._ Yibo thought in relief. _Now it’s only the shot of me screaming his name after he falls. I can do that!_

When the director yelled action, Yibo imagined Xiao Zhan falling to his death and let out a desperate scream for his name. 

”Let’s try this again,” the director said and Yibo obliged.

Immediately after his second try, the director walked to his side.

”I need you to dig deeper for this, Yibo,” he said. “You’ve been doing great in this scene so far. But now you’re alone in this one, but I know you can do it. Look there,” he pointed at Xiao Zhan who sat at the base, finally out of his harness. He was sitting in one corner, head down, not talking to anyone.

”You see him…,” the director continued. “That’s your Wei Ying. He is your love. And he fell to his death. His heart broke into so many pieces that he couldn't handle it. He lost his will to live. You will never see him again after this. For the rest of your life, you will never see him again. You will search and search...but you will never see him again.”

Yibo felt his heart constrict with every word the director said. Seeing his expression change and the way his eyes were fixed on Xiao Zhan, the director backed away slowly and signaled to everyone to be ready. Very softly, he called action.

When the shot ended, the whole crew was silent. And Xiao Zhan had stood up and was staring up at Wang Yibo, who had just let out a heart wrenching cry. His scream for Wei Ying was filled with desperation, turmoil, disbelief, and love. So much love. Xiao Zhan looked up at the boy. Even from that distance, he could tell Yibo was shaking. He climbed back up to him and bowed respectfully when the director patted them both on the back.

”You both were...perfect,” he said softly. 

Xiao Zhan let a small smile form on his face and kept looking at Yibo who finally snapped out of his frozen state. Xiao Zhan stretched out his hand and gently rubbed Yibo’s arm, his smile growing wider. Yibo finally took in a deep breath and smiled back.

As the director walked away, both Yibo and Xiao Zhan let their crew lead them away as well. The next two hours were a blur. People hovered around them as they stood in front of the mirrors in the dressing room. Someone removed their wigs, someone was cleaning their make-up, someone was carefully unwrapping their robes. The entire time, their eyes were fixed on each other’s reflection in the mirror.

When they finally got to their room that night, neither having an appetite for dinner, Xiao Zhan closed the door behind him and stood facing Yibo who stood silently in the middle of the room. They looked at each other and both had tears in their eyes which they let flow freely.

They moved simultaneously as if reading each other’s minds and soon, their arms wrapped around each other, pulling each other closer into a tight embrace. They stood still. Time stood still. Though the air around them hung silent, their minds were anything but.

 _I don’t think I’m ready to let go just yet._ Xiao Zhan thought as he pulled Yibo in for a tighter embrace. _I don’t think I’m ready to let go of you, Bo-di._

 _I love you, Zhan-ge._ Yibo thought and let himself be pulled closer into the embrace. _I’m truly, madly, deeply in love with you._


	23. I can’t keep away even if I really wanted to

* * *

Xiao Zhan opened his eyes and took in a deep breath. He didn’t know if it had been several seconds or several minutes and frankly, he didn't care. Nonetheless, he knew it was time to pull back. With another deep breath, he slowly slid his arms off Yibo and took a small step back. 

Yibo opened his eyes as he felt Xiao Zhan’s body retreat. He allowed him to pull back but didn’t let go. He searched Xiao Zhan’s eyes for something. He didn't know exactly what he was looking for but what he did find was a melancholic yet satisfied gaze looking back at him.

”That was...intense…,” Xiao Zhan whispered, wiping the now dried tears.

”Yep,” Yibo nodded as his hands gently massaged Xiao Zhan’s back.

Xiao Zhan smiled at him and then hesitantly, took another step back, just out of Yibo’s reach, much to his disappointment.

”You were fantastic, Bo-di...you blew everyone away.”

”You were better, Zhan-ge.”

”We made each other better,” Xiao Zhan gave him his trademark smile, though not as bright as usual. “Let’s leave it at that, shall we?”

”Okay,” Yibo smiled back, “we make each other better.”

”I’m exhausted,” Xiao Zhan sat on his bed and fell back. “I feel completely drained physically and emotionally.” 

“Yeah, me too,” Yibo stretched and swung his body from side to side in an attempt to loosen his aching muscles.

“My back is going to be so sore tomorrow thanks to the constant dangling,” Xiao Zhan groaned.

Yibo walked over and pulled Xiao Zhan up to a sitting position by his arms. He climbed onto the bed and knelt behind him. Gently, he began pressing his fingers into Xiao Zhan’s shoulders, kneading his way down his back.

”Tell me where it hurts,” Yibo asked as he focussed on his self assigned task.

Xiao Zhan would have flinched and probably stopped Yibo if it didn't feel so damn good. With every press, he could feel his knots loosen up and as Yibo increased the pressure, Xiao Zhan let out several sighs of relief.

”That’s perfect, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan murmured. 

”Here?” Yibo pushed into the spot again.

”Yes…,” Xiao Zhan moaned, “right there…”

Xiao Zhan froze out of embarrassment. Behind him, Yibo bit his lip as something primal stirred inside him upon hearing the sound. He kept playing with the spot, his fingers burning, his chest tightening.

Xiao Zhan bit his lip to prevent himself from making any more embarrassing sounds. But he let his head fall forward and his back arched as Yibo continued massaging him. He controlled his fluttering heart when Yibo focussed on his lower back. He was close enough for Xiao Zhan to feel his breath on his neck.

Yibo’s urges kept alternating between wanting to wrap his arms around Xiao Zhan and never let go or turn him around and proceed to kiss him senseless, He swallowed them both and directed all his pent up restlessness into the massage.

”That’s enough, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan turned to look back and smiled gratefully. “Thanks. Do you want one too?”

”No, you’re tired. Plus, I wasn’t in an uncomfortable position. I was literally lounging on the ground,” he grinned as he got off Xiao Zhan’s bed reluctantly.

”I’m glad that scene is done,” he scooted up his own bed and wrapped himself up in his blanket, laying on his side to face Xiao Zhan.

”Yeah, it was...disturbing. But I’m happy with it. I can't wait to see how it turns out after editing and effects.”

”Hmm...me too,” Yibo agreed as he yawned.

”Goodnight, Bo-di.”

“Goodnight, ge.”

* * *

Much to their relief, the next several days were filled with lighter scenes. Neither felt they had it in them to do any more emotional scenes for a while. Their batteries were still recharging. 

Yibo’s mind kept playing back to the long hug they had shared. His heart had melted seeing how satisfied and vulnerable Xiao Zhan had seemed. He was lost in his thoughts but snapped out of it when he heard a ruckus nearby.

He looked up and saw Zhoucheng and Xiao Zhan bickering. Xiao Zhan was giggling and playing with Zhoucheng’s sword, much to the other’s irritation. Zhoucheng, for his part, tried his best to stay professional but eventually gave up and began chasing after Xiao Zhan when he ran away with his sword.

A pang of jealousy hit Yibo and he immediately got up and joined Xuan Lu, Yubin, Hai Kuan and Zan Jin who stood in a circle around which Xiao Zhan and Zhoucheng ran. Yibo bit his lips, trying his best not to make his jealousy obvious but apparently he had failed.

”A-Xian,” Xuan Lu suddenly called out, “stop right now. You know Wangji doesn’t like it when you play with others,” she smirked.

Everyone let out a laugh as Yibo felt his face heat up. But because Xuan Lu had used their character names, no one had taken it too seriously including Xiao Zhan who now stood between Hai Kuan and Zhoucheng with a smirk on his face.

As the conversation continued, Yibo couldn't help but keep messing with Xiao Zhan even though he was standing opposite him and out of arm’s reach. He poked him with his sword and yanked his robe with it.

_No one plays with Zhan-ge but me._

Yibo could feel the need to mark his territory. As absurd as he felt at the thought, he couldn't stop himself. His eyes remained fixed on Xiao Zhan who was conversing with everyone and smiling and laughing from time to time. Yibo frowned as his attempts to get Xiao Zhan’s attention went unnoticed.

* * *

Xiao Zhan adjusted his hair as the group conversation flowed. He tried to keep himself from staring at Yibo in an attempt to slowly reduce his attachment to the boy. It was already nearing the end of July. A few more weeks and their time together would be over.

He had lasted a grand total of ten minutes. He couldn't help but throw a glance at Yibo who had stopped probing him with his sword. As soon as his eye caught Yibo’s they both stilled for a second and then burst into wide smiles followed by uncontrollable laughter.

No one knew what happened, not even them. But this was something that had started happening recently whenever they made eye contact on set. It would make it hard to enact some of the scenes but for the most part, they did alright.

Xiao Zhan’s smile grew wider as he saw how Yibo’s face lit up on being the target of his attention.

_Might as well give up trying. I can’t keep away even if I really wanted to._


	24. Say you won't let me go

By the end of July, it was the last day for many of the actors. With every wrap up, it was someone’s turn to leave. It had become normal to see a bouquet and cake being brought out as they would reluctantly bid farewell to yet another one of their friends. By the time August was upon them, only Zhan and Yibo remained from the main cast. 

And finally it was the day Zhan had been waiting for. Yibo’s birthday. He kept teasing and troubling him all day long, much to Yibo’s chagrin. As the clock approached midnight, Zhan yelled a countdown, while dodging Yibo’s attacks. 

”Wang Yibo!!! Happy birthday!” Zhan screamed at the top of his lungs, beaming from ear to ear.

Wang Yibo smiled in embarrassment and bowed to Zhan, thanking everyone for their wishes. After the cake cutting, Zhan and Yibo lounged around waiting for the next scene, when Zhan let out an audible groan.

“I forgot my eye drops in our room.” Zhan pursed his lips. “I need to change costumes. Yibo, can you go get them? My eyes are burning!”

“Oh,” Yibo jumped to his feet, “of course Zhan-ge.” He dashed away without Zhan having to ask twice, leaving behind a blinking Zhan who couldn’t believe how easily he had agreed.

When Yibo reached the room, he was taken aback when he saw a gift wrapped box sitting on his bed. He saw a note that said _‘Happy birthday, Bo-di. Stay safe and happy, always.’_

Yibo knew exactly who it was from and immediately rushed to rip it open. He gasped when he saw the helmet. It was perfect, it was Yibo’s favorite color and it was legit. Yibo knew the brand and knew it wasn't cheap. He caressed it as his heart filled with joy and warmth. 

If he didn't have his wig on, he would have tried the helmet. He began placing it back in the box when he noticed another note hidden amidst the packing material. Excited, he picked it up and began reading.

_Dear Yibo,  
Happy birthday once again! You’re finally 21 and are legally allowed to get married ;)  
Jokes aside, I wish you all the happiness and success in the world. You deserve everything. You’re very special, Yibo. Don’t ever forget that. I love your passion, your persistence, and your courage. Don’t ever change. And don’t ever forget me when you reach the stars and become a blindingly bright superstar yourself.  
P. S. I don't really need the eyedrops._

Yibo could feel something lodged in his throat. The back of his eyes began to burn and before he knew it, tears streamed down his cheeks, gushing out of control. He read and reread the note over and over again. Each time, tears flooded his eyes and fell with renewed force. It took him several minutes to gather himself, after which he took a deep breath and stepped back out to the set.

* * *

Zhan looked around nervously, while his wig was set into place, waiting for Yibo to return. 

_Did he like the helmet. Was it the kind he liked. I hope it was of good quality. I’ll kill my friend if he recommended a bad brand. Yibo needs a professional grade one. I hope he liked the customization._

As his nervous thoughts kept buzzing, he finally saw Yibo enter the dressing room with a strange look on his face.

“Thank you for the gift, Zhan-ge!” He sat across from Zhan.

_Oh god, he hated it. He’s trying to be polite. That is not an excited tone._

“No problem, Bo-di. Happy birthday!!” Zhan managed to feign a smile.

Yibo gulped when he noticed Zhan’s fake smile. He wanted to hug him so bad. He knew his thank you didn’t sound too genuine or excited but he was scared he’d start crying again if he expressed how he really felt.

_Fuck it._

“I loved it!” Yibo exclaimed after a few seconds of silence startling everyone. “I really loved it, ge,” he repeated softly.

“As long as you’re happy, Bo-di...”

Zhan’s entire body relaxed when he saw the genuine smile on Yibo’s face but he grew alarmed when he saw the sheen on Yibo’s eyes.

_Is he going to cry! I better do some damage control. He wouldn't want everyone to see him cry._

“Bo-di!” He yelled playfully.

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo grinned in return.

“Bo-di!” Zhan smiled affectionately.

“Zhan-ge,” Yibo’s voice grew softer and they stared at each other in silence for a few seconds before being called for the next shot.

* * *

Yibo climbed onto the balcony and then offered his hand to Zhan. As Zhan struggled with his robes, he took Yibo’s hand and hauled himself over the railing. The crew members left them on the balcony to set up the camera for the shot when suddenly, it began raining. In only a few seconds, it came down heavy and the downpour was almost deafening. 

Zhan and Yibo watched as the entire crew ran about seeking shelter, leaving them alone on the balcony to wait it out. Zhan and Yibo stood still, mesmerized by the beautiful rain droplets and the musical sound they made as they bounced off the rooftops. Yibo looked at Zhan as he played with the droplets, taken in by the beauty of the sight. He reached out and began playing with Zhan’s robes and adjusting his long black hair.

“What are you thinking?” Zhan turned to him.

“Thank you for the helmet, Zhan-ge,” Yibo smiled. “It was perfect. My favorite color. And you even remembered my racer name and number!”

“Of course, Bo-di,” Zhan wrapped an arm around Yibo’s shoulder and gave him a side hug. “I’m glad you liked it. Just be careful, okay?”

Yibo smiled at the concerned look on his face. Suddenly, the rain came down even harder causing the drops to spatter on them as they hit the railing with greater force. Zhan and Yibo stepped back further into the balcony. 

“Oh and also,” Yibo continued, “I will never forget you.”

“Huh?”

“What you wrote in the note….”

“Oh,” Zhan grinned. “I’m honored that the future superstar Yibo - heartthrob, idol, renowned actor, amazing racer - will remember me!”

“Shut up. I mean it, ge.”

“Of course I know that Bo-di,” Zhan smiled but then his face dropped. “But it will be...different after next week…”

“Different?” Yibo’s breath hitched.

“You know…,” Zhan stared at the rain with a sad expression. “It won’t be the same. We’ll move on to other projects, won’t see each other unless it’s at common events or the promotion events, never be...roommates again and have those late night conversations...things will change. Our jobs keep us so busy. It’s hard to…”

Something in Yibo snapped. He stepped in front of Zhan, dangerously close.

“No,” He spoke quietly but his voice was laced with anger.

“Yibo…,” Zhan was stunned by their sudden proximity. “What...”

“I said no…,” Yibo’s voice calmed down but sounded determined as if he had made a decision. “Nothing is going to change.”

“Yibo,” Zhan sighed and placed a hand on his chest and tried pushing him back, “of course it’s not going to be the sam…”

“Nothing will change. Xiao Zhan.” Yibo resisted and pushed Zhan further back into the wall and caged him in with his arms. “We don't have to...drift apart.” 

His eyes looked away from Zhan for a fraction of a second but then returned to him with renewed determination.

“Yibo…,” Zhan could feel something in him rise that he tried desperately to suppress.

“Say it…,” Yibo inched closer, his voice getting deeper and quieter, his eyes accidentally glancing at Zhan’s mole.

“Say what?” Zhan gulped.

“Say you won't let us...say you won't let me go.”

Zhan stared at Yibo for several seconds. He could feel himself dangerously close to closing the gap between them to do something unthinkable and unimaginable. But then, seeing the vulnerability in Yibo’s eyes, he felt a wave of affection spread across him.

“I won’t let you go…,” Zhan whispered and managed a small smile.

“Good,” Yibo’s body relaxed. “Because I won’t let you let me go.”

Zhan let out a nervous laugh and pushed Yibo back.

“My god, Yibo. Is that how you make people do what you want?!” He tried lightening the mood. 

“I’m serious, ge.” Yibo didn't smile back. “I can’t...I don't want us to fall out of touch. Promise me…”

“Shh,” Zhan placed a finger on Yibo’s lips. “Calm down, didi. Neither do I,” he smiled.

Zhan looked at his finger resting on Yibo’s plush lips. A wave of something else spread through Zhan’s body this time which he was unwilling to acknowledge. He found himself moving his finger to Yibo’s chin and stroking his jaw with his thumb. On feeling Yibo’s breath hitch, he immediately retracted it and rubbed the back of his neck.

“You can be so intense. No wonder you had such great chemistry with those girls…”

“Which girls?” Yibo began breathing again, willing his body to not fling itself on Zhan’s.

“The ones you did the duets with? The chemistry was on fire. It looked pretty...convincing,” Zhan stepped past Yibo and went back to the railing now that the rain had begun to subside.

“It was just an act,” Yibo stood beside him and eyed him carefully. “That’s my job.”

“It was a very good act. One day, some girl is going to fall really hard for you. And it won’t be an act anymore.”

Zhan’s expression gave nothing away but inside, he was reminding himself that Yibo was just a good friend. That Yibo would eventually find a girl. That Yibo was not gay.

_Fuck._ Zhan froze, as did his arm that was outstretched catching the raindrops. 

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._

He finally moved his hand and splashed the water on his face to cool it down. It felt like it was on fire.

_Fuck. I’m gay for Yibo. Fuck. Fuck, Fuck._


	25. You don't have to move on

* * *

On the last day of shoot, Zhan was thankful that the final scene they would shoot wasn’t something intense. Just a short action sequence. Zhan didn't think he could handle dealing with the wrap up of their summer and an emotional scene all at once.

He had already begun unraveling since his eyes opened that morning. It took every fiber of his being to not break down every time he looked at himself in the mirror dressed up as Wei Wuxian or practised his lines for the last time or glanced at Yibo, who looked equally morose.

After the last shot, the team brought out bouquets for them both and the director handed it to them, pulling them both in for a tight hug. They sat on the rooftop and posed for several photos. Zhan did his best to appear cheerful and celebrate the successful wrap of their show.

After everything was done, he had escaped quickly to hair and make up. He got done before Yibo, who kept throwing him glances and jabs which Zhan only half-heartedly returned.

”I’ll use the shower first,” Zhan mumbled and left the dressing room.

Yibo looked like he was about to say something but he settled for nodding in response.

As soon as he stepped out, Zhan found his feet leading him away from everything and everyone. He walked away from the lodging and followed the stream that was close to their shooting location. 

Finally, he let the tears out. With each step, his sniffs turned into sobs that turned into wails. His knees gave in and he dropped to the ground, covering his face, shaking with the deluge of emotion he felt.

_How can I let A-Xian go? What is going to happen to him? Will he always be alone? Will his Lan Zhan return and find him? How can I let go of this character that I have lived for four months?_

Then his thoughts wandered into another, more terrifying place.

_How do I move on from this life I’ve been living for four months. I’ve become so used to this routine, this place, these people. How do I go back to being...alone. How do I move on from...Yibo?_

__

“I can’t do it,” Zhan wrapped his arms around himself as he rocked back and forth, still on his knees. “I can’t do it…”

“What can’t you do?” A deep voice asked from behind him.

Zhan stopped rocking and opened his eyes slowly. He didn't bother wiping his tears or standing up from his pathetic position. He didn't bother turning around and looking at the person that stood behind him. 

All of a sudden, he felt a body drop down beside him and two arms wrapped themselves around him and pulled him close. Zhan buried his head in Yibo’s chest and the tears never stopped.

In that moment, Zhan looked like a small child whose heart had been broken. All Yibo wanted to do was hide him from the world and kiss away his tears. His own heart broke a little with every sob that Zhan let out.

He had known something was wrong when Zhan escaped after the wrap-up. He had known Zhan wouldn’t go back to the room just yet. He had known Zhan felt every emotion deeply, sometimes too deeply. He had known Zhan needed to let it all out. 

They stayed like that for a long time, gently swaying in the cool breeze. Yibo kept massaging Zhan’s arm, caressing his hair, dropping soothing words on him generously, until Zhan’s sobs turned into soft sniffles. 

Eventually, Zhan let out a long exhale and sat up straight, wiping his face. He didn't say anything for several minutes and Yibo just sat down beside him gazing at the sparkling water. 

”I can't move on...I don't think I know how to…,” Zhan choked.

Yibo waited patiently for him to continue.

”I...have never experienced such a thing. These four months...this summer...was easily the best summer of my life. I’m not sure I can move on from it...I’m not sure I want to…”

”Then don't…,” Yibo whispered, wiping a teardrop from Zhan’s cheek. “You don't have to move on. It’s not a final goodbye. Think of it as the start of something new. What you’ve done here, the bonds you’ve made, the things you’ve learnt...don’t have to be left behind...they can and will be with you...forever. They’ll give you the courage to keep walking forward, do your best, achieve greater things.”

”Sometimes I forget you have more experience than me in these things,” Zhan let out a small chuckle even as he sniffled some more. “Those were very wise words… _Wang-laoshi_.”

”Are we starting again?” Yibo grinned back.

”No...no...I dare not take on the mighty Wang Yibo…,” Zhan put both hands up in surrender. 

Yibo bared his teeth and caught both of Zhan’s wrist. Zhan laughed and struggled to break free. Yibo tussled with him as Zhan fought to free himself and eventually it turned into a wrestling match, with Zhan trying to push Yibo over while Yibo did the same.

The fact that they were laughing made it difficult to put their full strength into the fight but eventually Zhan, being the stronger one, managed to sit up on his knees and pin down Yibo. Not one to give up easily, Yibo spread his arms wide, forcing Zhan’s arms to spread as well, taking away his ability to support himself.

As a result, Zhan’s body fell on top of his. They doubled down in laughter as Zhan tried and failed miserably to regain control.

”I give up, I give up!” Zhan yelped. “Have mercy, my sides hurt from laughing. Let me go, Yibo.” Zhan pleaded between giggles.

”No,” Yibo replied panting..

”Ayaa, Yibo! You won! What more do you want?!” Zhan tried catching his breath between his pants and giggles and lifted his head up.

_A kiss._ Yibo’s mind automatically answered.

Yibo’s laughter faded slowly as his eyes roamed down to Zhan’s lips. He licked his lower lip and imagined planting a kiss on Zhan’s mole. He imagined doing many things to it and to Xiao Zhan.

Zhan’s eyes caught Yibo’s face when he realized that the laughter had subsided. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from Yibo’s lips. He imagined licking them all around and then biting them. He imagined doing many things to them and to Wang Yibo.

When their eyes met, there was an untamed desire lingering at the edges. Zhan felt a magnetic pull drawing them close; an invisible thread that had perhaps always existed between them since the beginning. 

All of a sudden, a hoot pierced through the heaviness in the air around them. Both jerked up immediately in one abrupt motion. Yibo let go of Zhan’s wrist and Zhan sat back up. 

”It was just an owl,” Zhan smiled nervously when the hoot repeated. “Guess there’s no need to be scared,” he rambled on. “You know...of an owl...no need to be scared of an owl. Although I jumped...out of fear...but turns out there’s no need...to be scared...of an owl.”

Yibo coughed and cleared his throat multiple times as he nodded along.

”Should we head back? There’s a small party, isn't there?” Zhan continued nervously.

”Hmm,” Yibo stood up and then offered his hand to help Zhan up.

”I hope there’s cake,” Zhan chuckled as he took Yibo’s hand, his heart calming down and voice becoming normal once again.

”There is,” Yibo smiled at Zhan and nodded his head. 

* * *

”So, when do you leave?” Zhan asked quietly as they walked back.

”Noon. You?”

”Ten in the morning.”

”We can go to the airport together…,” Yibo looked at Zhan hopefully. 

”It will be too early for you, Bo-di…”

”Not really…”

”You’ll have to wake up earlier than necessary.”

”Do you not want to go together?” Yibo stopped walking.

One look at his disappointed face and Zhan couldn't hold himself back. He stepped forward and threw his arms around Yibo. It had become a familiar sensation now, hugging Yibo, but it always left Zhan longing for more.

”Thank you, Bo-di. For everything you said and did when I broke down,” Zhan said.

Yibo wrapped his arms around him tightly and hid his face in the curve of Zhan’s neck, breathing in his scent.

_I think I know this fragrance now...I’ve figured out what he smells like._ Yibo thought as he took a long inhale. _He smells like Xiao Zhan. There’s no one else like him. And there never will be._

”And of course I want to go to the airport together. I want to squeeze as much time together as we can before we have to...leave.”

”Okay, ge,” Yibo shook and now it was his turn to sob.

Zhan rubbed his back gently with one hand and held the nape of his neck with the other. It was his turn to cradle the boy who was coming apart. He held him closer and closer with every sob and breathed in his scent as a thought passed his mind. 

_I will always think of him when I smell the first rain._


	26. If I sleep, it'll be tomorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the comments and love! I can't believe this story has crossed 2000 hits and 150 kudos! :O What!?? I feel so motivated. Keep the comments coming, I love hearing what you think and I reply to each and everyone!

* * *

When Zhan and Yibo returned to the lodging, no one was in sight.

”Guess the party’s started!” Zhan exclaimed.

They rushed ahead to the lounge and sure enough, the entire cast and crew had gathered there.

”There they are!” The director clapped his hands together. “Come quickly, boys. We’ve been waiting for you to cut the cake!”

”Sorry, Zheng-laoshi,” Zhan bowed and apologized. “We didn't know.”

The three of them held the knife together and cut the giant cake. Zhan’s mouth began drooling at the sight of the delicious cake and Yibo couldn’t help but chuckle at the obvious greed in his eyes.

”Everyone should hurry up and take a slice before Zhan-ge pounces on the cake,” Yibo laughed and received a smack from Zhan.

”Shut up,” Zhan scowled. “I...I was just…”

”I’ve not seen anyone who lusts after food as much as you, ge,” Yibo cut a slice and offered it to Zhan, who took it enthusiastically.

”We did it,” the director stood between them, one arm on each of their shoulders. “I’’m very happy and satisfied. Thank you, boys. You did well.”

”Thank you, laoshi,” Yibo and Zhan spoke in unison, drawing a chuckle from the director.

”Still in sync,” he shook his head, amused.

* * *

As the night progressed, food and drinks flowed freely. The lounge was abuzz with chatter and laughter and light music played in the background. Zhan was on his third round of cake and fourth round of beer.

”Don’t you have an early morning flight,” Yibo shook his head. “Go easy on the alcohol, Zhan-ge.”

”Ah, Wang-laoshi...always the mature and wise one. Have some fun, Yibo! This is a landmark occasion.”

”If I get drunk, who will take care of you,” Yibo raised an eyebrow at a swaying Zhan.

”Such a sweetheart,” Zhan put his plate down and reached to pull Yibo’s cheek. “Always taking care of me!”

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo dodged the attempt and fled from Zhan, snatching the beer from his hand. 

”Yibo! Give me my drink!!” Zhan screamed as he chased after Yibo.

Everyone rolled their eyes and laughed in amusement as the two bickered and ran about the room. Everyone was used to their antics by now. Yibo dashed just out of Zhan’s reach each time he came close to catching him. Zhan chased after him even as he ran to the porch outside, dangling the drink in front of his eyes teasingly. 

”Are you tired, Xiao-laoshi? Happens at your age,” Yibo snickered as he skipped about in delight, always just out of Zhan’s reach.

Finally, Zhan pouted and sat down upset. He refused to look or indulge Yibo any more. Hesitantly and carefully, Yibo stepped towards Zhan but soon realized he was genuinely done chasing him around.

”Zhan-ge?

”I’m not talking to you,” Zhan pouted more and looked away.

”Why,” Yibo bit his lips to stop himself from laughing at his cuteness.

”You took my drink away. I want to drink!!”

”Alright, alright…,” Yibo sighed and knelt in front of Zhan. “Here you go...just take it slow, okay?” He added softly.

Zhan’s entire face lit up as he grabbed the bottle and blew Yibo a flying kiss. Yibo, though surprised at the sudden gesture, pretended to catch the kiss and placed it on his cheek, seeing which Zhan burst into laughter and ruffled Yibo’s hair.

”Now help me up, Bo-di!!”

Yibo obliged and held on firmly to Zhan’s arm as he stumbled and giggled. They went back inside, just in time for a toast by the director.

”I want to thank everyone once more for all the hardwork and dedication. This project has been one hell of an experience and I will always cherish this summer. A big round of applause for the producers, the crew, the cast, and of course our dear Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji! Cheers!!”

Everyone raised their glasses and cheered and applauded as their spirits lifted at his words. Zhan and Yibo smiled brightly as they stood side by side, shoulder to shoulder.

* * *

Two more drinks down and Zhan turned into a flitting butterfly, never standing in one place for more than a few seconds. Yibo kept one eye on him, prepared to jump forward in case Zhan stumbled. 

Gradually, Zhan’s incessant exclamations turned into enthusiastic hugs. The first time it happened, Yibo watched in shock as Zhan reached out and pulled his body double into an awkward embrace.

”And a big thank you to you in particular! You were amazing. Thank you for making me look good!!”

Next, he charged at the action director, “Thank you so much for all your hard work, laoshi. I have learnt so much from you!” Zhan hugged him and then bowed unsteadily.

Yibo watched with a frown, his jealousy growing with every random hug Zhan threw at whoever was closest. Soon, Zhan’s speech was slurred and when he nearly tripped over his own feet, Yibo knew it was time to take him back to the room.

”Okay…,” Yibo walked over to Zhan and held him by the shoulder, “time for you to go to sleep,” he directed Zhan away from the lounge.

On the way out, he saw the director who nodded at him, smiling, and Yibo bowed slightly.

”Noooo,” Zhan resisted, trying to run back inside.

”You have a morning flight, remember?

”I don’t wannaaa….,” Zhan pouted. “Pleaasee…”

Yibo smiled affectionately as he pressed the button for the elevator, one hand clutching Zhan’s wrist.

”I don’t wanna go…,” Zhan’s voice grew soft and he let his weight fall on Yibo as he rested his head on Yibo’s shoulder. “I don’t wanna take that flight…I don’t wanna leave.”

Yibo held back the tears that were threatening to spill out again as he entered the elevator and held Zhan close.

* * *

By the time they got to the room, Zhan had nearly dozed off on Yibo’s shoulder. Yibo placed him down on his bed gently and took his sandals off. He knelt by the bed and stared at Zhan for a few seconds.

”Yibo…,” Zhan stirred and opened his eyes.

”I’m here, ge.”

”Okay...don’t go…”

”I won’t.”

Zhan scooched over and made space for Yibo. Yibo hesitated for a second but then seeing Zhan’s hopeful face, gave in. He sat against the headboard, the way Zhan had when Yibo had asked him to sleep beside him, and placed his hand on his chest.

”No…,” Zhan suddenly grunted and wrapped his arm around Yibo’s waist, yanking him lower until he was laying beside him.

Yibo yelped at the unexpected manhandling and landed rather awkwardly beside Zhan, barely managing to stay on the bed and not fall to the floor. Before he could adjust himself to a more comfortable position, Zhan draped his arm across Yibo and turned him onto his side facing him.

They lay face to face, Zhan’s hand still on Yibo’s arm. Yibo could feel Zhan’s warm breath He could smell the liquor on him, nearly intoxicating him just by its smell. He looked into Zhan’s brown eyes as they gazed back at him in silence.

”What are you thinking,” Zhan spoke finally.

”Nothing, you?”

 _I’m thinking about how much I want to kiss you._ Zhan’s thoughts were racing.

”Nothing, you?”

”You already asked me, ge,” Yibo chuckled softly.

”Oh…,” Zhan mumbled and moved his hand onto Yibo’s hand that was resting on the bed between them.

”Close your eyes, ge. It’s already past midnight.”

”I don't want to.” 

”Why?” Yibo asked.

”Because if I close my eyes, then I’ll fall asleep. And if I fall asleep, then tomorrow will come. And if tomorrow comes…”

Both fell silent again. Yibo moved his hand on top of Zhan’s and intertwined their fingers. Zhan shuffled closer to Yibo until their faces were mere inches apart. Yibo gulped at their proximity but couldn't find it in himself to move away.

 _He’s drunk._ Yibo reminded himself. _Don’t do anything stupid._

”Wang Yibo?” Zhan said in a husky voice, gazing deep into his eyes.

”Yes?” Yibo felt his stomach flip on hearing Zhan call him by his full name.

”Nothing…,” Zhan said after several seconds.

”What is it, ge?”

 _I love you._ Zhan thought quietly as his eyes finally closed and he drifted off into a dreamless slumber.


	27. No matter what, I need to tell him

When Yibo woke up, Zhan’s arm and leg were draped over him.

_What I would give to wake up like this every morning. But I should get up now. Don't want Zhan-ge to feel embarrassed when he wakes up. He was too drunk last night._ Yibo glanced at the clock. _It’s 5 am. I’ll wake him up at 8 so we can leave for the airport on time._

He sighed and slowly slid out from underneath Zhan. He knelt by the bed and let his fingers hold on to Zhan’s for a moment longer. He leaned forward and placed a kiss on Zhan’s hand before letting it go. He went back to his bed and set an alarm, turning on his side to gaze at Zhan as he dozed off.

* * *

When Zhan woke up, it was dark inside and outside the room. He felt around the bed but couldn't find what he was looking for. He lifted his head up and saw that the space next to him was empty. He turned over and saw Yibo, asleep in his own bed.

Zhan felt an ache in his heart. He couldn't stand the distance between them. He contemplated going over and sleeping beside him but held himself back.

_It’s 6 am and we both have to be up early. We need to get some sleep._

With those thoughts, he turned to face Yibo and fell asleep admiring his serene face.

* * *

At 8 am, Yibo’s alarm went off, startling both Zhan and him awake. Zhan groaned at the loud noise and covered his head with a pillow. Yibo scrambled to turn the alarm off, seeing Zhan’s reaction. With the alarm silenced, he sat up in a daze, now fully awake and alert. 

”Zhan-ge, get up. We have to get ready.

”Five more minutes.”

”Okay. I’ll shower first but don’t fall asleep again, okay?”

Zhan lifted his hand out from under the pillow and gave him a thumbs up.

Fifteen minutes later, Yibo emerged from the bathroom and saw Zhan sitting at the edge of his bed, elbows on his knees, hands clutching his hair as his head hung forward.

”That bad, huh?” Yibo grinned as he dried his hair. 

”Shh…,” Zhan hushed him. “Why did I drink that much!”

”You should have listened to me. Here…,” Yibo handed him a glass of water.

When Zhan made no motion to take it, Yibo lifted his head up with his hand and put the glass to his mouth forcing him to drink. Carefully, he tilted the glass up as Zhan gulped down the water thirstily. After he was done, Yibo quickly wiped the water that had dripped down Zhan’s chin and neck, at which point Zhan let out a chuckle.

”What?” Yibo tilted his head as he let his fingers linger around Zhan’s neck a moment longer.

”Just laughing at the role reversal. Remember that scene?” Zhan’s eyes shone brightly.

Yibo grinned and proceeded to pack his bag. Zhan stood up and clutching his head, made his way to the shower.

”I should have listened to you,” he groaned as he closed the bathroom door behind him.

* * *

Zhan and Yibo sat at the back of the van as they made their way to the airport. Each had one part of the ear piece as they listened to songs on Yibo’s phone. Zhan was scrolling through his playlists when one song caught his eye. It was his favorite artist, Stefanie Sun’s song - Against the light (Ni guang).

_Perhaps I've always been afraid that there's an answer  
Perhaps love is swirling quietly in the wind  
To leave, to let go  
Fleeting yet repeating  
Sometimes, I answer my own questions.  
  
I do not want difficulties to tear us apart,  
I blame myself for not being brave enough  
Regretting for not reaching  
Still scared even after we've embraced  
So I pushed you away  
While I still remain here.  
  
At that instance, there came a ray of light  
Piercing my eyes  
Your gaze was of understanding  
Why couldn't you just turn away  
I stood against the light, and there I saw.  
  
The light came from your tears glistening  
I don't wish to resist anymore  
Finally I come face-to-face with hope, and against the light  
I feel that the place where love exists,  
It has always been right beside me  
  
I thought I could retreat my steps  
And prove repeatedly,  
How wrong our love was  
Everything was dark when my back was turned against you  
Enduring tiredness,  
I opened my eyes and opened the window.  
Only then did I realize  
You were the light.  
_

As the melody faded, Zhan realized they had slid closer to each other and now sat shoulder to shoulder, arm to arm, thigh to thigh. Despite his racing heart, something inside Zhan felt like a calm sea.

_I’m going to tell him. No matter what. I need to tell him. I have to be brave. I don't want to live in regret. He is like a bright ray of light that has pierced my life. I don't want to resist anymore. That place where love exists, is right beside me._ Zhan glanced at Yibo who was leaning forward and scrolling through the playlist for the next song. _He is my light._

* * *

Yibo bit his lip as the Stefanie Sun song faded away. The powerful lyrics had moved him and he understood why she was Zhan’s absolute favorite. He scrolled through the playlist as Zhan seemed lost in his thoughts until he came across one of his favorites - Nan Hai by Liang Bo. He hummed along, occasionally singing along with some of the lines.

_...can't forget your love...but the ending is difficult to change…  
...I failed to keep you...I couldn’t give you the love that boy can…  
...I’ll miss you wherever I’m wandering…  
_

_No._ Yibo pushed those lyrics aside. _I will write my own ending. I won't fail to keep him with me in any way I can. I will give him all my love. I’m going to tell him. No matter what. I need to tell him._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs:  
> Stefanie Sun - Ni Guang - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCqJcK3v4q0  
> Liang Bo - Nan Hai - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uNnAhPetbpY


	28. Barely any seconds to spare

* * *

They sat in the VIP lounge near Zhan’s gate. There was still half an hour till boarding began. Zhan sat nervously, fiddling with his thumbs as he built up the courage. They were alone in the waiting lounge and this was the perfect moment, but all his previous determination was failing him.

”Are you still hungover, ge?” Yibo’s voice brought him out of his thoughts.

”Huh? Oh...no, I’m better. The breakfast helped.”

”Keep drinking water,” Yibo shoved a bottle in his hand as he eyed Zhan carefully.

_Something isn’t right. Maybe...now is not the right time to confess...NO! I have to tell him now. Who knows when we’ll see each other next. Be brave, Yibo! Just say it. Say the three words. I. Love. You._

”Huh? Did you say something?” Zhan looked at him after taking a long gulp of water. 

”Huh? No. Did you?” Yibo replied nervously biting his lips.

”Uhh...no…,” Zhan pursed his lips and an awkward silence followed.

Zhan and Yibo looked at their phones and glanced at each other occasionally, never at the same time. Eventually though, their eyes made contact and they held each other’s gaze.

_Come on, Yibo. As Nike said, just do it!_

_Come on, Zhan. Say it!_

”Ge, I…”

”Bo-di, I...,” 

Both spoke simultaneously and paused.

”What were you going to say?” Both spoke together again.

This time, they giggled at the sync, which eventually turned into full blown laughter. As they clutched their sides and fell back, tears began sliding out their eyes. They doubled down on seeing each other’s twisted expressions as they laughed helplessly.

”If only Zheng-laoshi were here...” Zhan managed to utter before bursting into giggles again.

”Yeah...he would love our sync.” Yibo recovered from their fit finally, wiping his tears. “What were you going to say, ge?”

”I...can’t...talk…,” Zhan managed to speak between giggles. “You...first…”

Yibo sobered up and gulped. But one look at Zhan’s laughing face and crinkled half moon eyes and his heart melted. He moved forward and sat at the edge of his seat. Fidgeting with his fingers, he looked at his shoes and then back at Zhan. Zhan saw the change in Yibo’s expression and stopped laughing. 

”Everything okay, Bo-di?” 

Yibo took in a deep breath and smiled.

”Yes. I’m...okay. Actually, I’m more than okay. And I have been for the last four months,” Yibo gained confidence with each word. “And a big part of the reason is…”

”Xiao Zhan?!” A loud voice interrupted Yibo.

They both startled and looked in the direction of the sound and saw an excited man in the distance, walking hurriedly in their direction.

”I thought it was you!” The man patted his arm and grinned from ear to ear. “Fancy running into you here! Are you guys done with your drama too?”

”Yes,” Zhan smiled and bowed briefly. “Zhang-ge...this is Wang Yibo...my co-star...,” Zhan glanced at Yibo, “...and my friend.”

Yibo felt both happy and sad at those words but managed a smile as he bowed to the man.

”Yibo...this is Zhang RuoYun, my co-star from Joy of Life,” Zhan introduced them officially.

”So I’m not your friend too?” Zhang RuoYun gave Zhan a pout and nudged him with his elbow. “And who doesn’t know Wang Yibo. Nice to finally meet you in person, young man.”

Hearing himself being referred to as a young man by his senior, temporarily dissipated some of the anger Yibo was harboring towards the man for interrupting such an important moment. Only temporarily though. The elbow nudging had brought all of it back again. 

”Anyway, I just stopped by when I saw you here. I have to rush for my flight! See you around, Xiao Zhan,” He gave Zhan a quick side hug much to Yibo’s irritation 

With that, the man left just as abruptly as he had arrived. Yibo and Zhan stared at each other and sat down quietly.

”So…,” Zhan broke the silence. “You were saying?”

”Uhh...huh? Oh yeah...can’t remember...where I was exactly…,” Yibo frowned.

”You said you were more than okay and have been in the past four months…,” Zhan shook his head and smiled.

”Oh...yeah,” Yibo straightened up again and gave him a small smile. “And a big part of the reason behind that is…”

A loud ring startled both Yibo and Zhan as Yibo’s phone blared loudly and vibrated against the glass table top on which it was kept.

”Oh wow,” Zhan placed a hand on his chest, eyes wide open. “I nearly had a heart attack."

Yibo frowned at the phone.

"Well…?” Zhan gestured to Yibo, “pick it up already, it’s so loud!!”

”Sorry, ge. It’s my manager.”

Yibo answered the call and all Zhan heard for the next several minutes, ten minutes as a matter of fact, were a string of _’hmm’_ s and _’okay’_ s.”

When the conversation was done, Yibo hurriedly put his phone away and leaned forward towards Zhan.

”Zhan-ge...here’s the thing…

”Wait, Yibo…,” Zhan leaned forward as well. “I...there’s something I...need to...umm…”

”No, ge...mine’s more important...let me…”

”Shut up and listen to me, Bo-di….I don't have much time...I just...I want to tell…”

”Xiao Zhan!” Yibo’s bodyguard rushed in. “Hurry up! Everyone’s done boarding the flight. They’re waiting for you!”

”Oh for fuck’s sake,” Yibo threw his arms up and fell back against the seat.

Zhan groaned as well as the bodyguard hurriedly picked up his bags and began ushering him out of the lounge.

”You can't miss the flight!” The bodyguard spoke and Zhan could hear the urgency and concern in his voice.

Zhan looked at Yibo who had stood up as well, clearly frustrated.

 _Is this how I really want to confess?_ Zhan thought to himself. _While rushing out with barely a few seconds to spare? Without being able to talk about it properly and explain myself and make sure the conversation ends on a good note so as to not make things awkward between us? Should I even say anything knowing his answer? Is it worth risking our friendship?_

Yibo watched as Zhan gathered his things. His words were caught in his throat and he couldn't find it in himself to finish what he had started.

 _Is this how I want to do it?_ Yibo thought to himself. _As he is running out? Without any time to smooth things over after he tells me he is not gay and rejects me? He’ll just leave here uncomfortable and weirded out by me if I tell him in a hurry now. What if...what if he doesn’t feel comfortable after I tell him? What if I...lose him. What if this ruins our friendship forever?_

As Yibo’s thoughts rolled downhill, he felt a hand catch hold of his and squeeze it tight. He looked up to see a half-smiling Zhan lean in and bump shoulders with him. As he did so, Zhan lingered near Yibo’s ear and whispered.

“No matter what, your friendship is the most important thing to me, Bo-di. I won't let it go.”

As Zhan pulled back, his half smile had turned into a full smile but still didn't reach his eyes. He squeezed Yibo’s arm and then slowly trailed behind the bodyguard to board his flight.

Yibo watched with a heavy heart as Zhan left the lounge and the door closed behind him. His words rang in his ears. After a long, deep silence, he took in a long inhale and let out an even longer exhale, making up his mind.

_If being friends is what will keep Zhan-ge in my life forever, then that’s what we will be._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SIKE! You thought the end of this chapter would be something else, didn't you? I can already feel some of you cursing me and unfollowing this story now!! 😅😋☹️😜
> 
> Sorry! But like I said, this is one heck of a slow burn.
> 
> However...let's just say...some things are gonna go down in the next few chapters 😉


	29. Guess who

* * *

Zhan closed the door behind him and leaned against it. He took in the sight that welcomed him home after four months of living in the lodging on location.

_It’s hard to tell which one feels more like home and which one feels like a temporary lodging._

With a sigh, Zhan entered his ‘home’ or the apartment that he tried to call home. In reality, though, it was merely a space for him to sleep in in between his hectic schedule. He never lived long enough in the apartment to really make it his own. The designer in him wanted to do so much with the place to make it personal and homely, but it was always pushed to ‘later’.

After putting away his bags and freshening up, Zhan ordered in some food. Normally, when he was this dull, he would cook to lift this spirits. But at the moment, there were no groceries. He lounged on his couch, flipping mindlessly through the TV channels. 

It was going to be a slow few months with only his lingering X-Nine commitments and the upcoming concert and some auditions. And one very important audition - Jade Dynasty. Suddenly a familiar face greeted him on the TV screen.

”Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed automatically.

He sat through the entire TTXS episode, his eyes impatiently searching for Yibo on the screen and then glued on the boy every time he did show up on screen. If someone asked Zhan after the episode what it was about, he wouldn't have been able to answer that. All his attention had been solely on Yibo.

 _This isn't nearly enough to get me through the week._ Zhan sighed yet again.

* * *

Yibo rushed into his apartment, dropped his bags, and ran to shower quickly. He had another flight to catch in two hours and he was already late. Much to irritation initially, he had no rest period between the end of the Untamed shoot and his next set of commitments. But now, with everything that had happened or rather that had not happened, he was relieved and almost thankful that he would be busy enough to not dwell on his heartache.

He would be juggling two shows - Gank you heart and One more try - in addition to TTXS. It was going to be crazy and he had no time to stop now. As he was getting ready, Yibo looked around his bedroom. There were no two beds in close proximity, no shared wardrobe, no sketchbook filled with beautiful doodles and words.There was no Zhan.

_This is not going to be easy._

He glanced at his phone, trying to decide if he should text Zhan or not.

 _Is it too soon to text? Will it seem to desperate and pathetic. But...I am desperate and pathetic._ Yibo nearly chuckled at the thought.

As he was trying to make up his mind, his phone screen lit up and he saw a message notification. His eyes lit up even brighter on seeing the sender’s name.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo snatched the phone from the bed.

> _Zhan-ge: Did you reach safely, Bo-di?  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes, ge! You?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Made it in one piece.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: My apartment feels so...quiet.  
>    
>  Yibo: Mine too...  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: This summer really was the best, wasn't it...  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes...it was...  
>    
>  Yibo: Zhan-ge, I really have to run right now. Have to fly out for Gank your heart.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Already?!_ 😲  
>    
>  _Yibo: Yeah_ 😓 _And that too, Canada...I’m excited but I’m also dreading the long flight!!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Take care, Bo-di. Get some rest on the flight.  
>    
>  Yibo: I will, ge. I’ll message you later, okay? Gotta run.  
>    
>  _

With that, Yibo put his phone inside his pocket, picked up the pre-packed bags, and dashed out the door.

Zhan stared at his phone, pondering on whether he should hit send on the message that he had currently typed out..

> _Zhan: Miss you, didi...|_

> _Zhan: Miss you|_

> _Zhan: Miss|_

> _Zhan: |_

> _Zhan: Have a safe flight, Bo-di.|_

Zhan hit send and threw his phone aside. He leaned back against the couch and dragged his hand down his face with a groan.

”Get it together, Zhan...don't make this more difficult on yourself than it has to be.”

* * *

Yibo had unknowingly dozed off the entire car ride to the airport and was in a daze the entire time he was being led through security and to his gate. As soon as he boarded, his eyes shut down once more and the next thing Yibo knew, he was in Canada. 

Yibo quickly pulled out his phone and sure enough there was one unread message from Zhan.

> _Zhan-ge: Have a safe flight, Bo-di._

_Shit, I should have messaged him from the car and while boarding. It’s been so long! I told him I would message later._

The sensation of missing Zhan was turning into a feeling of void inside him as if a chunk of him was missing.

 _He’s taken my heart with him._ Yibo sighed.

After several minutes of trying to send Zhan a reply and failing, Yibo turned to his assistant and threw her a questioning look while waving his phone around.

”Oh! Yes,” she shuffled through her bag and pulled out another phone. “This one has international roaming. Here you go…”

Yibo nodded and thanked her, hurriedly saving Zhan’s phone number on it so he could text him.

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge! Sorry it took me so long to message you. I slept the entire journey.  
>    
>  Yibo: This is my temporary number while I’m in Canada.| _

Suddenly, a thought crossed Yibo’s mind and a smirk spread across his face. He erased the message and began typing again.

> _Yibo: Hey, handsome...guess who..._


	30. The real smile is better

* * *

> _Unknown: Hey, handsome...guess who..._

Zhan woke up and rubbed his eyes over and over again seeing the strange message from an unknown phone number. Chalking it down to some wrong number, Zhan ignored the message and got out of bed.

_I wonder what Yibo is doing now. He must be busy with the rest of the cast or something. I wonder if he's having as much with them as we had. I wonder if...he is opening up to someone new like he did with me. Stop thinking about him, Zhan! He obviously won't be thinking about you non-stop like you are thinking of him!!_

* * *

__

Yibo frowned at his phone when there was no response.

__

_It’s 8 am for Zhan-ge...he’s seen the message. Why didn't he respond? Maybe I need to bug him a little more._

__

Yibo’s smirk returned and he typed vigorously, an evil glint in his eyes.

__

* * *

__

As soon as Zhan stepped out of the shower, he checked his phone, hoping to get a message from Yibo.

__

_He said he would message later. Guess he’s too busy. And there’s the time difference. What is it now, 8.30 am here? So that’s...6.30 pm there. He should be awake. Or maybe he’s too tired. What does it matter, Zhan. It’s not like he’s your boyfriend._

__

Zhan’s heart grew heavy but then another text caught his attention.

__

> __
> 
> _Unknown: Aww...don’t ignore me, baby..._
> 
> __

_  
_

This time, Zhan didn’t ignore the message.

__

> __
> 
> _Zhan: I think you have the wrong number.  
>    
>  Unknown: Nope. You’re the right one, darling. _
> 
> __

_  
_

Zhan frowned and arched an eyebrow.

__

_Who is this moron!?_

__

> __
> 
> _Zhan: Sorry, who is this? I don’t have this number saved.  
>    
>  Unknown: You’re breaking my heart. Don’t you know who I am? Or are there others who call you baby and darling!?_ 😞  
>    
> _Zhan: No, I don't know who you are. And stop calling me those names.  
>    
>  Unknown: Okay then, what would you like me to call you? Sweetheart?  
>    
>  Zhan: Who is this?  
>    
>  Unknown: Your future boyfriend.  
>  _
> 
> __

_  
_

Zhan froze. For a brief second, he felt like he had been outed. Like his secret had been revealed to the whole wide world without his consent. 

__

_Does this person know me and that I’m gay?! How could they!? When even I just realized that I like…_

__

Zhan gulped, hurriedly locked his screen and shoved the phone in his pocket as he dashed out of the room to head for the day’s schedule.

__

* * *

__

Yibo smirked in satisfaction as he waited for Zhan’s message. But no reply came even several minutes later.

__

_Maybe Zhan-ge’s busy at work. I should go join the others for dinner too before I fall asleep right here._ Yibo thought as he yawned.

__

After dinner and three hours later, Yibo tossed and turned in his bed, staring at his phone every few seconds.

__

_Why isn't he replying yet?! Did I go too far with the boyfriend joke? Maybe he got weirded out because it implied he is gay? Or maybe he just doesn’t want to indulge a creepy stranger. Yibo!!_

__

Not one to give up, Yibo typed another message.

__

* * *

__

Zhan had been distracted all morning. It was almost noon and his brain was still obsessing over the morning message. He was torn between wanting to find out who the unknown person was and wanting to block them forever. Ultimately, his curiosity got the better of him. He whipped his phone out during the break and sure enough, there was one unread message.

__

> __
> 
> _Unknown: Aww...gege...is this how you treat your secret admirers?  
>    
>  Zhan: How did you get my number?  
>    
>  Unknown: I have my ways _😎  
>    
> _Zhan: Oh...so then you’re a fan who somehow managed to get my number? Unfortunately, that means I will have to cancel this number and get a new one. Bye.  
>    
>  Unknown: NO! No no no, wait!!! I’m not a fan!  
>    
>  Zhan: So you’re not my fan?  
>    
>  Unknown: No, not at all!  
>    
>  Zhan: Oh...so you don't like my work?  
>    
>  Unknown: Huh? Oh. No, that’s not what I meant!  
>    
>  Unknown: I mean I’m not one of those crazy sasaeng fans!  
>    
>  Zhan: So you’re a true fan who just happened to get my number and won’t tell me who you are? Yep, sound like a sasaeng to me! _
> 
> __

_  
_

Yibo frowned hard as he reached a dead end.

__

_This isn't how this conversation was supposed to go! I should be having fun teasing him not...this!_

__

* * *

__

Zhan smirked. 

__

_Ha! How does that feel now, Mr. Unknown. Looks like your little prank has failed._

__

The next message, however, made his jaw drop.

__

> __
> 
> _Unknown: Zhan-ge!!!! Don’t go. It’s me. Yibo! Fine, I give up._ 😑😶🙄  
>    
> _Zhan: Bo-di?  
>    
>  Unknown: Yes, ge!_ 😝  
>    
> _Zhan: What the hell, didi!?  
>    
>  Unknown: Sorry, ge. This is my temporary Canadian number. I couldn’t resist _😉  
>    
> _Zhan: Isn’t it past 10 pm there, Bo-di? And you had such a long flight. You should sleep!  
>    
>  Unknown: Yeah...I’m exhausted. And shoot begins tomorrow. Gn, ge.  
>    
>  Zhan: Gn, didi. Sleep well.  
>    
>  Unknown: Ge…  
>    
>  Zhan: Bo-di..._😊  
>    
> _Unknown: The real smile is better. I miss it._
> 
> __

_  
_

For a few seconds, Yibo could see Zhan typing. But no message came. And then the typing stopped. A few more seconds passed and Yibo began getting nervous.

__

_Did I go too far? Did it come across as weird? One man missing another man’s smile. God, Yibo! What is wrong with you…_

__

Before he could finish the thought, his phone screen lit up. It was an incoming video call from Zhan. Yibo froze, unsure what to do. There was something intimate about a video call. They had never done that before. Hesitantly, heart racing, Yibo accepted the call.

__

* * *

__

Zhan hesitated but finally gave in. Just seeing those three words on his screen were enough to make him give in to his desires. He had been dying to see Yibo’s face. And the words had given him the perfect excuse. He bit his lips as he waited for Yibo to pick up the call. Before he could wrap his mind around the intimacy of doing a video call, Yibo’s face lit up his screen.

__

”Hi…,” Yibo smiled, shyly or sleepily Zhan couldn't tell. 

__

”Hey…,” Zhan smiled back.

__

Yibo’s heart was fluttering and melting all at once. 

__

”I was right,” Yibo grinned. “The real one is better. You shouldn’t throw your smiles around so casually, Zhan-ge. Us mere mortals could die.”

__

”Are we starting this, Bo-di?” Zhan’s smile widened.

__

Yibo pretended to get hit in the chest and leaned back against the headboard of his bed.

__

”Oh god!” Zhan giggled and smacked his forehead, “So dramatic, Bo-di! Save the acting for tomorrow. Now go sleep!”

__

”Did Zhan-ge call me just to say hi and kill me with his smile?”

__

”I promised you I wouldn’t let go, didn't I?" Zhan replied softly. "Now get some rest.”

__

Yibo’s entire face lit up as he lay down completely and tucked himself in. 

__

”Goodnight, ge…”

__

”Sweet dreams, Bo-di…”

__


	31. Maybe it's time I let go

* * *

The next few days passed by quickly. Zhan was busy preparing for the upcoming X-Nine concert in December and the few auditions he had lined up. Texting Yibo seemed to take up as much of his day as the preparations. But he had noticed that the time difference had begun to take a toll on their chats. They were never online at the same time. And he had started to feel that frequency of the messages was reducing as well.

One week later, Zhan woke up with a heaviness that was now becoming more and more familiar. He could almost feel the distance that separated Yibo and him.

_It’s evening for him now, maybe I could message him? He may be free._

> _Zhan: Good morning, Bo-di  
>    
>  Zhan: Or should I say, good evening?_ 😄 

Twenty minutes later, Zhan was ready but there was no new message on his phone. With a sigh, Zhan left his apartment, willing himself to push all Yibo thoughts aside and focus on his audition for Jade Dynasty.

* * *

Four hours later, Zhan emerged from the fancy high-rise building with a beaming face. Ecstatic, he pulled out his phone and opened his chat with Yibo. Despite there being no response yet, Zhan’s smile did not diminish. He had some really good news and nothing could dampen his spirits. Although he wasn't supposed to tell anyone yet, all he wanted to do was share this moment with Yibo.

> _Zhan: Bo-di! I have some amazing news!!! Call me?_

With that, Zhan happily strutted towards his car and smiled all the way to his rehearsals. On reaching the studio, he was yanked inside by his band mates.

”You’re late!” Peng Chu Yue grunted. “Come on! Hurry up. We have a lot to go over.”

”And a hello to you too,” Zhan rolled his eyes but smiled at the chaotic boy who was running all around the room, getting everyone active and ready for rehearsals.

Zhan gave one final glance at his phone and frowned.

_He must be asleep. He hasn’t even seen the message._

Before he could dwell on his disappointment, he was hauled to the center of the room by ChuYue and put into his position in the formation.

* * *

Zhan entered his apartment and immediately slid down resting his back against the door. All his muscles were sore from the day long rehearsal. It was nearly 11 pm and they had just wrapped up for the day. He caught his breath as he leaned forward and gently massaged his neck.

He had nearly dozed off in the car ride home and shook his head to avoid that from happening now. He trudged his way to the bathroom and took a quick shower. Too exhausted to eat, he crashed on to his bed and rolled to one side. He had given up checking his phone midway through the day, not wanting to feel disappointed over and over again. His mind knew Yibo was asleep, but that didn’t stop his heart from hurting every time he opened the chat, only to see no reply.

Nonetheless, he pulled his phone out. The fact that it was now early morning in Canada giving him some hope. When he unlocked his screen, he was greeted by three missed calls from an hour ago and two new messages. Zhan sat up abruptly despite his tiredness and opened the chat.

> _Bo-di: Sorry, Zhan-ge. You must be asleep. I tried calling.  
>    
>  Bo-di: I have an early morning sched now so will be busy but maybe we can talk when you wake up? What’s your good news? _

Zhan felt a rising glee in his heart and he nearly squealed.

> _Zhan: I’m awake! I was at rehearsals for the concert. My phone was on silent.  
>    
>  Zhan: We can talk when I wake up. I want to tell you the good news over the phone, not text! _

Zhan slept excited and thrilled at the prospect of talking to Yibo. He waited impatiently for the morning to arrive.

* * *

Four times. Four times Zhan tried calling Yibo but there was no answer. With a dejected sigh, Zhan made his way to the photoshoot, putting on his professional face. When the day was done, Zhan checked the phone every few seconds, determined not to miss Yibo’s call this time. But the call never came. Zhan didn't realize when he dozed off, phone in hand until he woke up to bright sunlight hitting him straight in the eye. He hurriedly checked his phone and sure enough there was one new message.

> _Bo-di: I didn’t realize when I dozed off, ge! Shoot is really hectic because we have only a few more days to wrap up the schedule here.  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m sorry, ge. I’m dying to know what your good news is! _

Zhan couldn't help but melt at the constant apologies.

_Of course he is busy, Zhan! Stop expecting so much from him. It’s not like...you’re just...you're just friends. Don't forget that._

> _Zhan: I get it, didi. I can’t wait to tell you either.  
>    
>  Zhan: What the hell…  
>    
>  Zhan: I got the role. I’m going to be the lead in a movie, Bo-di!  
>    
>  Zhan: They loved me and said they wanted me almost immediately after I auditioned!_ 😀😀 

Zhan kept reminding himself throughout the day, that it was okay if Yibo didn’t reply. But another thought had started to nag him and he was failing the fight against it.

_He was the one who insisted so intensely that we shouldn't lose touch. He asked me to not let go of us. To not let go of him! But it feels like...he is letting go of me. It’s barely been two weeks since we parted and it’s already...like this._

Zhan groaned and pushed the thought out of his head. He sat up straight in the chair as the production team of the Jade Dynasty tried various looks and hairstyles on him. 

_You should be excited about this, Zhan! Your first lead role in a film. Such a big opportunity. And you’re behaving like a love struck teenager, pining away and being all bitter about someone, who just considers you their friend, not giving you more of their time. But...but he was the one who said it._

Zhan swallowed the knot that was stuck in his throat. 

_He said he wouldn’t let go. Maybe...maybe that was all just in the heat of the moment. Yibo is young. He can move on quickly. He must be having fun with the new cast. He has so many new projects and commitments to keep him busy. He just said it because he was emotional. That was all...everything that I felt...the friendship...the bond...the closeness...maybe it was all just...fleeting._

* * *

That night, Zhan halfheartedly checked his phone and saw some messages from Yibo. Barely a few minutes had passed since Yibo’s reply but Zhan couldn't get himself to feel hopeful. 

> _Bo-di: THAT’S AMAZING, GE!!! Congratulations!!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Who wouldn't want to cast the handsome and talented Xiao Zhan!  
>    
>  Zhan: Thanks, Yibo.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Zhan-ge! You’re online! Finally, we’re both online at the same time. Call?  
>    
>  Zhan: I’m actually really tired, Yibo. Some other time?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Oh...alright. Yeah...you should rest. Good night, ge. And congratulations once again. I’m so so happy!  
>  _

Zhan couldn't manage a smile. Something in him had snapped and the heaviness had grown tenfold. 

_Maybe it’s time I let go._


	32. We have a problem, a big one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Crossed 3500 hits and 200 kudos. What?!?!?! Thank you for all your comments and likes. I'm just glad I haven't lost all my readers due to my extremely slow burn! :P

* * *

For the next few days, Yibo found himself becoming more and more restless. No matter how much he tried to ignore it, he couldn't help but feel that something was wrong with Zhan. His messages were short and seemed unenthusiastic. 

_Is he...is he letting go? Am I reading too much into this? It’s just...everything’s been so chaotic in this shoot that I’ve had no time to...things feel like they’re changing now. What did I expect with the way our careers are? We barely have any time for ourselves...how on earth would we have time for each other? But he promised me._

__

The gnawing thoughts only grew as each day passed him by and Zhan’s messages grew more infrequent and became shorter and quieter. Finally, when the last day of shoot was done, Yibo sighed in relief and packed his bags. It was time to go home. 

__

He had started to feel the distance between him and Zhan, both literally and figuratively. All he wanted to do now was to rush back to China and head straight to Zhan’s home. As the flight neared its end, the idea grew stronger and stronger in Yibo’s mind. 

__

_What if he’s not home? What if he gets awkward by my unannounced presence. Fuck it. It’s been days since we spoke properly. I need to see Zhan-ge._

__

As he waited impatiently for boarding to begin, his restless skateboarding was interrupted by his manager. She shoved her phone in his face and whispered discreetly.

__

”We have a problem. A big one.”

__

* * *

__

Zhan had woken up this morning with the same heaviness. But a tiny part of him had woken up excited about the fact that today was Yibo’s last day in Canada. That by the end of the day, they would be in the same country again. That maybe all the missed calls and late replies, and sometimes no replies, to his texts were just a product of them being in different time zones and not because of all the negative reasons Zhan’s insecure mind and heart had imagined.

__

His dullness still prevented him from messaging Yibo lest his hopes rose up again only to be let down. But the last message from Yibo had given him a sliver of joy. He had allowed himself to let out a tiny smile at it.

__

> _Bo-di: Finally done here, ge! Soon, I’ll be back home.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Maybe we could meet? Before I start my next schedule for the skateboarding show?  
>    
>  Bo-di: It's been too long since I've seen Xiao-laoshi's beautiful face _ 😛 

__

Zhan had not replied. He had wanted to. He had wanted to type a big fat yes in all capital letters. He had wanted to send multiple emojis and exclamation marks following the yes. But Zhan had never been good at dealing with his emotions. Especially when they got hurt. Just losing the frequency and sync of his interaction with Yibo for two weeks had affected Zhan way more than it should have. His heart was heavy and his mind was feeding him all sorts of pessimistic thoughts. He couldn’t keep up with all the emotions his insecurity was drawing out of him. 

__

When Zhan felt the weight of things burden him down, he would shut himself off. He could never get himself to open up to people without feeling like a liability. And so he would wait until he would have enough time alone to drink his heart out and then cry his heart out. The only time Zhan had gotten close to sharing his burden with someone, was with Yibo. It had happened inadvertently when Yibo overheard his conversation with his mother. But when Yibo confronted him, he didn't deny it. He had felt a little relieved and lighter after the conversation, despite the fact that he had, even then, kept his emotions in check so as to not let them flow over and drown Yibo in them.

__

Which is exactly what had happened after the last day of shooting on the sets of the Untamed. Somehow, he hadn't felt like he was burdening Yibo. But now, with the constant lack of messages and the added sense of rejection it evoked in Zhan, he felt like any extra efforts from his side would be a burden on someone as busy as Yibo. 

__

_Don't be stupid, Zhan. This is Yibo you’re talking about. Even though you’ve only known him for a few months, your bond is real. Even if he doesn’t feel the same way as you do, your friendship is real. Stop acting like an insecure teen and have some faith in your friend. Don't push him away first just because you’re scared he will push you away eventually. This is Yibo._

__

Zhan shook his head and pulled out his phone to reply. 

__

> _Zhan: Of course we can meet, didi.  
>    
>  Zhan: Can’t wait to see you _😊  
>    
>  _Zhan: I can cook, if you want to come over sometime!_

__

_There. That’s better. Now you’re acting your age, Zhan. Be a mature man who can handle all his emotions. Even the negative ones. There’s no need to feel scared. Even if things go wrong or you get hurt, that doesn’t mean it’s anyone’s fault or that Yibo and you have to go in opposite ways. Whatever happens, you won't run away and let go of this first._

__

* * *

__

Yibo was awake the entire flight home. His mind was racing as it went over what his manager had shown him before boarding.

__

_”Wang Yibo rumored to be pursuing a young female trainee.”_

__

His mind had blanked immediately as he tried to imagine where such a story had even begun to come from.

__

_I’m so overbooked that I don’t even have time to breathe properly. How can someone think that I have the time to pursue someone!?_

__

When Yibo landed, he was still as baffled as he had been at boarding. He grew more irritated when he thought about all the damage control that would have to be done to refute the rumors.

__

_Whatever! I don't care about all this right now. All I want to do is see Zhan-ge._

____

He wondered if Zhan had replied to his last message about meeting up. His temporary Canada number wouldn’t receive any messages now and there were no new messages on his regular number. 

__

_Guess I’ll only know when I show up at Zhan-ge’s place if he wants to meet up or not._

__

* * *

__

When Zhan got home later in the evening, he scrolled through Weibo mindlessly as he ate his dinner alone. He decided to look up Yibo on the app, as he had grown used to doing, to get his daily Yibo fill. But the results this time were not something he could have ever anticipated.

__

_”Wang Yibo rumored to be pursuing a young female trainee.”_

__

Zhan put the phone down slowly and closed his eyes. His first instinct was to cry. The second was to shout. The third was to unsend his last message to Yibo. He wasn’t sure if he was capable of meeting Yibo and keeping it together. He took deep breaths and tried to remind himself of his promise.

__

_Even if this rumor isn't true...one day, this is bound to happen. Yibo will date someone. Eventually. But I won't let go of our friendship. I won’t be the first one to let go. I can’t imagine my life without him in it. Even if it’s just as a friend. Even if it’s not as close a friendship as before. Even if it’s the hardest thing I’ll ever have to do._

__

* * *

__

In order to avoid any interference by his already panicking and paranoid manager, Yibo chose to first head to his own apartment. He dropped his bags and took a quick shower. He planned on riding his bike to Zhan’s home which was 45 minutes away from his. 

As he got on to his bike, a smile appeared on his face for the first time since he left Canada. It automatically soothed him to be on his bike, riding through the night. It automatically re energized him, thinking that he was riding to see Xiao Zhan.

__


	33. Who was I kidding

* * *

Yibo entered the building hesitantly. He suddenly realized that visiting Zhan’s home was crossing yet another boundary in their friendship. This meeting was not like their usual hangouts which were only during their shooting days. This meeting wasn’t a text or a video call when they were separated by time and distance.

This meeting would be face to face. This meeting would be their first since the end of the shooting. This meeting was already bringing back all his emotions for Zhan that he had carefully packed away, making himself content with just friendship.

_It doesn’t matter._ Yibo thought as he made his way into the elevator. _It doesn’t matter how hard it is. I just want to see him. I just want him in my life. In whatever way he allows._

* * *

Zhan was all wrapped up and half asleep in bed when he thought he heard a soft knock on his door. 

_There’s no way someone is visiting me at this hour._

Zhan turned off his lamp and tucked himself in properly.

He heard another knock, this time louder. Confused, Zhan got out of bed reluctantly. With incessant yawns and endless eye rubbing, he made his way to the door. 

With another yawn, he opened it absentmindedly and saw no one outside the door. Baffled, he stood there scratching his head.

_That’s strange. Is someone playing a prank on me!?_

* * *

Yibo stood outside the door hesitantly. 

_What if he’s asleep already?_

Yibo knocked softly and waited. As seconds turned into minutes, he contemplated if he should try again.

_You’ve come all this way, don't chicken out now._

Yibo knocked a second time, this time louder. He waited patiently but then decided he didn't want to disturb Zhan. He turned back and walked towards the elevator with a heavy heart when a soft voice made him stop in his tracks.

”Bo-di?”

Yibo swallowed and tried to calm his racing heart. Slowly, he turned around to see a dazed Xiao Zhan standing in the hallway, rubbing his eyes.

”Bo-di?” Zhan repeated.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo grinned nervously as he took a few steps towards Zhan.

With each step that took him closer to Zhan, Yibo felt an overwhelming urge to rush forward and pull Zhan into an embrace. He hadn't realized how much he had missed everything about Zhan until he was face to face with him.

_Control yourself, Yibo. Keep your feelings in check. You are already barging into Zhan’s personal space at such an odd hour. You don’t want to make him more uncomfortable._

He paused a few steps away from Zhan and gave a slight wave of his hand. The whole time, Zhan had not taken his eyes off Yibo. With each step, Zhan’s expression had changed from confusion to recognition to disbelief to now, something Yibo could not read.

”I...did I disturb…”

Before Yibo could complete his question, he felt soft hands grab him by the arms and pull him into a warm embrace.

* * *

Zhan poked his head out the door and looked left then right. His eyes stopped on a figure that was walking towards the elevator. He shook his head to check if he was imagining it, and took another step out the door to get a clearer view.

_No, it can’t be him._

Before he knew what he was doing, he called out.

”Bo-di?”

The figure stopped and didn't move any further. In fact, the figure didn't do anything for a few seconds and Zhan was convinced he had guessed wrong. But then, the figure turned around and Zhan’s mind caught up and realized it really was Yibo, standing there in his hallway.

Zhan rubbed his eyes to check if he was imagining things. But no matter how many times he rubbed, Yibo was still standing there, grinning at him. 

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo smiled as he took a few steps towards Zhan.

With each step that brought him closer to Zhan, Zhan felt an overwhelming urge to rush forward and pull Yibo into an embrace. He hadn't realized how much he had missed everything about Yibo until he was face to face with him.

Yibo paused a few steps away from him and gave a slight wave of his hand. The whole time, Zhan couldn't take his eyes off Yibo. Zhan’s confusion turned into disbelief and then incredible, unbelievable, uncontrollable happiness.

”I...did I disturb…”, Yibo stuttered.

Zhan didn't let him complete his nervous question. He closed the gap that lingered between them and wrapped his arms around Yibo, pulling him closer to his racing heart, burying his face in the familiar smell of the first rain that followed Yibo wherever he went. Zhan felt a warmth spread throughout his body, thawing any and every part of him that he had let his insecurities freeze. 

_Who was I kidding? There’s no way I can push him away._

* * *

__

Yibo’s eyes opened wide as Zhan enveloped him and the familiar scent that was solely Xiao Zhan’s filled his every breath. He closed his eyes and buried his face in Zhan’s neck, tightening his grip around the man that was holding on to him just as tightly.

__

Eventually, much to Yibo’s dismay, Zhan pulled away and took a step back. But there was a growing smile on his face that melted every part of Yibo that had fretted about the distance he had felt over the last two weeks away from Zhan.

__

_Who was I kidding? Our bond is real. Even if it’s not everything I want, our friendship is real. He hasn't let go._

__


	34. It made me think of you

* * *

”Bo-di,” Zhan’s smile grew wider.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo matched his smile. “I was right.”

”Right about?”

“The real one is better. You shouldn’t throw your smiles around so casually, Zhan-ge. Us mere mortals could die.” Yibo mimicked getting shot in the chest and grinned mischievously. 

”Are we starting this, Bo-di?” Zhan shook his head.

”Are we going to have the rest of this conversation here in the hallway?” Yibo tilted his head to one side and pursed his lips.

”Oh,” Zhan rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, “come on in!”

Yibo followed Zhan into his apartment and closed the door behind him. He paused and looked around, admiring the decor and warmth that the space radiated.

_This entire place smells like Zhan-ge._ Yibo took a deep breath.

”Have you eaten? You look tired. Why didn't you tell me you were coming? I would have cooked. I only have some leftovers from the takeout I ordered.” Zhan frowned as he rummaged through the fridge.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo muttered.

”What is it, Bo-di?Zhan responded absentmindedly. “Let’s see...I can warm this up for you.”

Yibo walked towards Zhan and turned him around by the shoulder and shut the fridge.

”Zhan-ge.”

”Yes, Bo-di! What is it? I’m just trying to get some food in you!” Zhan rolled his eyes.

”Hi…,” Yibo gave a soft smile, still holding Zhan by the shoulders.

Zhan blinked a few times and then relaxed and smiled back.

”Hey…,” Zhan’s eyes crinkled and Yibo felt his stomach flip.

”I brought you something,” Yibo reached into his pocket, grinning nervously.

”You...you…,” Zhan was too surprised to respond properly.

Yibo pulled out two small boxes and handed them to Zhan who just stared at them blankly. Chuckling, Yibo held up Zhan’s hand and placed them on his palm.

”Open them,” Yibo said expectantly.

Zhan gulped and stared at the boxes, then Yibo, then the boxes again. He snapped out of his daze and placed the boxes on the kitchen counter and began opening them one by one.

His eyes widened when he saw a magnet with a beautiful painting of a sunset in the background with a black silhouette of a skyscape in the foreground. 

”That’s the skyline of the city we shot in. I thought it was a beautiful illustration...and that you would like it. Do you...do you like it?”

Zhan looked at Yibo’s expectant eyes that were boring into his, searching for something.

”It’s beautiful, didi.” Zhan gazed at the magnet lovingly and exhaled deeply. “Thank you,” he looked up at Yibo again and smiled brightly.

”Open the other one,” Yibo smiled in relief and exclaimed.

Zhan’s breath hitched when he saw what was in the second box. He pulled out a chain necklace. At the end, hanging delicately, were three pendants - a rose, a fox, and a little boy. 

”This is...these are…,” Zhan gasped. 

”From the book the little prince...your favorite, right?” Yibo smiled proudly. “I remembered!”

”How did you...where did you find this?!” Zhan stuttered as he gently touched each pendant.

”I saw it in a shop we were shooting close to. Some of the cast went shopping to buy souvenirs and I saw the magnet and this and it made me think of you! A little something to congratulate you on your movie role! Do you...do you like...”

”YES!” Zhan exclaimed before Yibo could finish his question. “I LOVE IT!”

Zhan hurriedly took the entire necklace out of the box and began putting it around his neck. Unable to join the clasps behind him, he turned to Yibo.

”Can you…?” Zhan asked with a grin.

Yibo nodded and held the chain as Zhan turned his back to Yibo. Carefully, he brought the clasp close to the hook and was about to lock the ends together, when his fingers grazed the skin on Zhan’s neck. A shiver ran down his spine and his heart fluttered. 

Slowly, he let himself fumble with the necklace, causing his fingers to brush against Zhan’s skin again and again. Finally, he took a small breath and joined the ends, locking the necklace in place. Gently, he placed it back down on Zhan’s neck and smoothed the chain against the soft skin. He gulped and controlled his urge to place a kiss on the glowing skin.

* * *

Zhan turned excitedly, his fingers playing with the pendants as Yibo helped him fix the necklace. His fingers froze when he suddenly felt warm fingers against his skin. He felt goosebumps travel down his back as the fingers brushed against his neck again and again as Yibo attempted to lock the clasp.

Zhan swallowed his urge to lean back into the touch and sigh. He tried to stay as still as possible so as to not startle Yibo away. When he finally managed to lock the necklace, Yibo adjusted it to settle it on his neck but Zhan had forgotten all about the pendants. All he could focus on was Yibo’s breath on the back of his neck and the smooth fingers that were pressing against his skin.

He wished that things were different and they were in an alternate universe where Yibo would reach forward and place kisses along his neck, trailing up to his ears, and then sliding his tongue against his skin as he made his way along Zhan’s jawline.

Eventually though, he felt the fingers pull back and Zhan tried to hide his disappointment as he turned to face Yibo, fingers settling on the pendants once more.

”I love this so much Yibo!” Zhan smiled happily. “Thank you so so much. How does it...how does it look?”

”It looks perfect,” Yibo gave him a wide smile and stared gleefully at Zhan’s fingers as they played with the necklace. “Suits you.”

”This is one of the best gifts I have ever received.” Zhan smiled fondly and squeezed Yibo’s hand.

For a moment, they stared at each other in silence. Neither spoke. 

_What I would give to lean in and kiss him right now._ Yibo thought.

_I wish I could pull him closer and know what he tastes like._ Zhan sighed inwardly.

A few seconds later, Yibo cleared his throat and placed a hand on his stomach.

”Okay, I think I am hungry after all, ge.” Yibo pursed his lips as he looked about the kitchen trying to avoid Zhan’s eyes.

”Oh,” Zhan straightened himself and glanced about nervously. “Yeah! Yes. Let me...let me heat up the leftovers.”

They sat on the couch watching a random show as Yibo ate. The silence was comfortable. The domesticity of the moment left Zhan yearning for more. 

”So what’s your schedule like from tomorrow?” Zhan asked without taking his eyes off the TV.

”Actually,” Yibo replied between bites, “I have tomorrow off!”

”Finally! Zhan faced Yibo and threw his hands in the air. “You can rest!”

”Yeah...but unfortunately, I am jetlagged. It’s morning for me, technically and although I am insanely exhausted, I don't think I will be able to sleep just yet,” he pouted.

”Oh! So what are you going to do then?”

”I was wondering if…,” Yibo hesitated, “if I could stay here tonight? I don't feel like being alone. But,” he added hurriedly, “I can go if you don't want me to or if you have a crazy schedule tomorrow!”

Zhan remained silent for a while longer. His mind raced as he tried to make up his mind. His heart was dying to scream out a giant yes but his mind worried about how hard it would be to not do something stupid if Yibo stayed the night. Eventually, his heart won.

_What the heck. I’ll take any amount of time I get to spend with him._

“The shooting for the Jade Dynasty doesn’t begin until the day after and I only have rehearsals for the concert tomorrow,” Zhan bit his lips. “I don't mind you staying here if you don't feel like being alone,” he let out a small smile.

”Really?!” Yibo grinned brightly. “Can I come watch you rehearse too?!”

”No!” Zhan groaned and covered his face. “I’m terrible at dancing. You’ll make fun of me!”

”Of course not, ge! I could...help you,” Yibo replied earnestly. “And I would...we could spend some time together before we both get busy with our next shoots.”

Zhan’s heart melted at Yibo’s sincerity.

_I can never say no to him!_

”That sounds nice, didi,” Zhan smiled and played with his necklace. “Let’s do it. Before the craziness begins again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The little prince necklace design -  
> https://i.etsystatic.com/17594079/r/il/298c8a/1776332739/il_794xN.1776332739_c9kv.jpg


	35. Are you going to follow me around like a little puppy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 4000 views and 250 likes. THANK YOU for all the likes and comments. I'm super charged and on a writing spree right now. Hopefully, you all can appreciate the slow but growing softness between Yizhan and hopefully the next few chapters will be satisfying.

* * *

”I mean it, ge. I’ll be fine sleeping on the couch.” Yibo insisted.

_How do I tell you that it’s going to be so hard to control myself if I’m on the same bed as you, Zhan-ge!_

”My bed is big enough for two people, Bo-di,” Zhan smiled. “You’re already tired. You won't sleep well if you’re uncomfortable.”

_I just want to be as close to you as I can, Yibo!_

”Alright,” Yibo sighed and grinned. “Thanks, ge. But I’m still not sleepy. You should go and sleep, I’ll just watch some TV or play some games.”

”I can stay up. That’s the whole point, Bo-di! So we can spend time together!”

”Are you sure?” Yibo asked hesitantly.

”Of course, didi,” Zhan smiled softly and ruffled Yibo’s hair.

Zhan’s eyes lit up and he followed Zhan around subconsciously as he tidied up the kitchen, washed the dishes, and watered his plants.

”Are you going to follow me around like a little puppy the whole time?” Zhan looked at him in amusement.

”Oh,” Yibo blushed. “Sorry. Didn't realize I was.”

Zhan chuckled and shook his head, resuming his chores.

”Why don’t you sit and rest. I have some video games you would like. I just need to clean things before turning in tonight.”

Yibo nodded and made his way back to the couch. As he started playing the game, occasionally glancing in the direction of Zhan, the domesticity of the moment tugged at his heart strings.

_I wish this was what I came home to every night._

* * *

Zhan plonked himself on the couch beside Yibo when he was done and sighed, leaning back as he rubbed the side of his neck. He brought one foot up over his other knee and massaged it half-heartedly. Yibo eyed him a few times before ending the game and scooching to one end of the couch.

”Stretch your legs, ge. I can massage your feet properly.”

”What?” Zhan raised an eyebrow. “You had an insanely long flight across the world and are jet lagged and you want to massage me?!"

Yibo smiled and shrugged.

”It’s alright, Bo-di…”

Before Zhan could finish his sentence, Yibo rolled his eyes and reached out for Zhan’s legs. He tugged them onto the couch and placed his feet on his lap. With a smirk, he gently pressed into the soles, testing the pressure. He looked at Zhan questioningly and was given an answer in the form of a relieved exhale as Zhan closed his eyes and leaned back.

”Give me your feet too,” Zhan smiled and patted his thighs. “You could use a massage too.”

For the next thirty minutes, both watch a variety show on the TV as they sat on opposite ends of the couch, their legs stretched in between them. as they massaged each other’s feet. When Zhan felt the fingers on his feet pause, he looked in the direction of Yibo and noticed that his eyes were closed, mouth partially open, breathing gently and deeply. 

Zhan smiled to himself and put Yibo’s feet aside on the couch. He shuffled closer to him and was about to wake him up to head to the bedroom when something stopped him. An urge to just keep staring at the sleeping boy and admire his face. An urge to touch the soft cheeks and press his lips against the plush lips. An urge to trail his tongue down the sinful jawline and neck and suck on the enticing adam’s apple. 

Zhan gulped and without realizing it, leaned in closer and closer, lost in the sight of Yibo’s lips. He bit his own lips and was about to give into his desires when Yibo stirred. Zhan quickly leaned away a little and exhaled a breath he didn't know he had been holding.

”Yibo…,” he whispered.

”Bo-di…,” he repeated softly.

But Yibo did not move.

Zhan contemplated letting Yibo sleep on the couch but he knew he would wake up sore. He stood up and pursed his lips and then, making up his mind, scooped Yibo up in his arms and carried him into his room.

* * *

Yibo woke up in the middle of the night, dishevelled and disoriented. For a minute, he forgot where he was. He looked around in confusion, unable to recognize the room he was in. Until his eyes found Zhan sleeping on the same bed beside him.

Slowly, a smile spread across Yibo’s face and he lay back down and relaxed. He slid closer to Zhan, who was sleeping on his side, facing Yibo. Yibo sighed at the soft expression on Zhan’s face as he probably dreamt of things Yibo would never know.

Zhan stirred a little in his sleep and mumbled something incomprehensible. Yibo scooched even closer to try and see if he could understand what Zhan was saying. A few seconds later, Zhan mumbled something again and this time, Yibo thought he caught a few words.

”......I need...no...stay…”

 _I wonder what he’s dreaming about. None of these words make much sense._ Yibo grinned.

”Yibo…”

Yibo’s yawn froze midway as he heard Zhan mutter his name. A smile lit up his face at the thought that he was in Zhan’s dream. But the next word dimmed his excitement.

“Little puppy…”

 _Even in his dreams he thinks of me as a baby!_ Yibo frowned grumpily.

Yibo was about to turn to his other side and try and sleep again when Zhan’s arm stretched out and placed itself on Yibo’s hip. Before Yibo knew what was happening, Zhan shuffled closer and threw one leg across Yibo’s, tightening his arm around him. Pretty soon, Zhan’s face was tucked into Yibo’s neck and he had fallen back into deep sleep.

Yibo stayed as still as he could so as to not wake Zhan up. Slowly, ever so discreetly, he placed his hand on Zhan’s arm and nuzzled closer. He turned his face towards Zhan and lightly, placed a kiss on his forehead. He took in Zhan’s scent and let out a long sigh and closed his eyes satisfied.


	36. I'll help you

* * *

Zhan woke up groggily pulling his soft pillow closer. His hands pressed into it and it was then that he realized that the thing he was cuddling was not his pillow at all. Zhan’s eyes shot wide open and he saw Yibo. In his arms. His entire body plastered against his side. Legs entangled in each other. His lips were almost resting on Yibo’s collarbone. Even though he knew he should have moved immediately, Zhan couldn't find it in himself to do so. 

Yibo let out a deep exhale as his eyes opened slightly before shutting again. He nuzzled closer to the warmth beside him and tilted his head towards it. When he realized the thing under his chin was in fact Zhan’s head, thanks to his hair tickling his chin, his eyes shot wide open. He remembered that Zhan had wrapped himself around him at night, and now not only was he plastered against him, but he had moved closer to the point that he could feel every breath Zhan’s body took. 

Yibo could feel Zhan’s lips brushing against his collarbone as he slept soundly. A shiver ran down his spine at the warm contact. Slowly, he pulled back a little and at the same moment, Zhan’s eyes opened up to look at him.

”Hey…,” Zhan spoke softly and gave him a small, sleepy smile.

”Hey…,” Yibo smiled back.

”Slept well?”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded slightly. “You?”

”Hmm,” Zhan sighed and adjusted his legs that were still entangled.

It was then that Zhan realized what was happening. With an exclamation, he sprung back and sat up.

”Oh! I’m so sorry, Bo-di. I…,” Zhan fumbled and felt his face heat up, “...I normally...sleep with my...I cuddle with my pillow. It’s a habit...I didn't mean to...sorry…”

Yibo sat and rubbed the back of his neck, equally embarrassed.

”It’s...it’s okay, ge.” Yibo muttered and cleared his throat. “I...I sleep better cuddling with something as well…,” a smirk suddenly appeared on his face. “And who better to cuddle with than the amazing Xiao Zhan, breaker of a million hearts. So many girls out there would kill to be in my place!”

”Not first thing in the morning, Yibo!!” Zhan rolled his eyes and grabbed his pillow and threw it at Yibo. “Let’s get ready. I have to get to rehearsal.”

* * *

”There you are! We need to…,” Peng ChuYue stopped mid-sentence as another figure, slightly shorter than Zhan, walked in behind him, his face covered with a mask.

Zhan smiled and waved at the rest of the boys and then to ChuYue, who was still staring at the figure.

”Everyone…,” Zhan began with an unsure smile, “this is my friend, Wang Yibo. He was in town and just wanted to stop by for sometime and...hang out.”

”Yibo-ge!” Yan Xujia exclaimed and walked towards him excited. “It’s so good to see you again.”

”Oh, that’s right.” Zhan glanced at Yibo who was taking his mask off to reveal an embarrassed smile. “You two know each other from Gank your heart!”

”Wow!” Wu Jiacheng came forward and bowed. “It’s so amazing to meet you in person.”

”Nice to meet you all too,” Yibo bowed back, his embarrassment growing.

”Come on in, ge,” Xujia led Yibo in by his shoulders. “Are you going to watch us rehearse?!”

”If that’s alright…,” Yibo nodded with a small smile. “I had some free time and…”

”And you decided to spend it watching our rehearsal?” ChuYue finally spoke.

Something in his tone caught Zhan’s attention. He eyed the boy carefully and thought he saw a glint of something that was a mix of doubt and irritation on his face. But before he could say or do anything, it was replaced by a formal, well mannered smile.

”It’s nice to meet you,” ChuYue extended a hand out.

Zhan could see hesitance and discomfort in Yibo’s eyes even though his face gave none of it away. They shook hands and ChuYue returned to the group that was lounging around.

”Okay boys,” he called out. “Time to begin.”

* * *

Yibo sat at the end of one of the mirrored walls, watching the rehearsal progress. The choreography was fun and light and suited all the band members who were at different levels of dancing skills. 

He managed his expressions as he watched Zhan rehearsing. He tracked every movement, every expression, as Zhan focussed on learning each step, correcting every mistake, repeating each section multiple times, continuing even when the others took a break. Occasionally, he would glance at Yibo and smile, eliciting a smile from Yibo and making Yibo’s heart flutter.

At one point in the middle of a song, the group came together in pairs and trios as they sung a part of the song, swaying, smiling, interacting within themselves. Yibo’s eyes fixated on Zhan who had one arm wrapped lightly around Xia Zhiguang as they sung together. He could feel the taste of vinegar creeping up his throat. His heart skipped a beat and his chest tightened when suddenly, Zhiguang wrapped his arm tightly around Zhan’s neck and pulled him closer to his body. Zhan let out a yelp and giggled, trying to free himself from his grip. 

”Guaanggg!” Zhan exclaimed as Zhiguang cackled and held him tighter, ruffling his hair. “Let me go!”

By now the vinegar had reached Yibo’s mouth and his knuckles clenched as he gritted his teeth, trying his best to school his expression. His practised poker face took over but his eyes never left Zhiguang and Zhan. Finally Zhan managed to pull out Zhiguang’s grip, causing Yibo to unclench his knuckles and jaw a bit. But Zhiguang didn't unwrap his arm from around Zhan, and Yibo wanted to march towards them and peel him off Zhan. He let out an inaudible sigh of relief when Zhiguang finally let go and they moved on to another song. The choreography for this one was a little more complicated and Yibo could see Zhan struggling with some parts of it.

In one specific bit, Zhan was stuck on one step that he just was not able to wrap his head around. It was like his body had forgotten how to coordinate his arms with his legs and he just stood there tangled in himself, confused and frustrated. Yibo smiled at the cuteness and how adorable Zhan looked when he focussed on getting the step right. But his smile dissipated slowly when he saw Peng ChuYue walk up to Zhan and manhandle him.

”Let’s break it down,” ChuYue observed Zhan doing the step and then reached out for his shoulders. “First, move your shoulders this way and then,” his hands slid down to Zhan’s elbows, “angle your arms like this.”

Zhan repeated the motion, oblivious to Yibo’s intense stare, until ChuYue nodded in approval. 

”Now the legs.” ChuYue positioned himself behind Zhan, placing his hands on his hips. 

Yibo felt his entire body shake with anger as he tried his best to not scream and push ChuYue away from Zhan.

_Get your filthy hands off my Zhan-ge!!_ Yibo’s thoughts raged in his head.

“Mirror me like this,” ChuYue moved his hips and legs, simultaneously pushing Zhan’s hips to follow his rhythm.

Zhan continued the motion several times and then nodded.

”Okay. I think I can try it on my own now.”

They cued the music and Zhan exhaled as he prepared himself. He started with the earlier sections of the choreography and was able to keep up until the difficult section came up and he fumbled again.

”I’m sorry,” Zhan groaned and dragged his hands down his face in exasperation. “I don't know why this bit is so hard.”

”It’s not a big deal, Zhan-Zhan. You’ll get it.” ChuYue smiled and reached out for Zhan. “Let’s try again.”

Yibo’s ears perked up at the term of endearment. He felt something rise up from his stomach all the way up his throat until it was in his mouth. Before he knew it, he stood up and the thing took the form of words.

”It’s okay,” Yibo walked over to them and stood on the other side of Zhan. “I can help him.”

His eyes stared straight at ChuYue who was staring back at him. Neither flinched and there was silence for a few seconds. Yibo lifted one hand up and caught hold of Zhan’s elbow, pulling him closer to his side, his eyes never leaving ChuYue. He could feel ChuYue’s grip still holding Zhan back.

”I got him,” Yibo nearly whispered as he moved his hand down to Zhan’s wrist and almost yanked him to one corner of the room.

ChuYue let go of Zhan’s arm and crossed his arms across his chest, his eyes still observing the duo. Zhan looked between the two boys, unsure and confused. His mind tried making sense of what seemed to have transpired between the two of them. He could sense some tension in the air but couldn't figure out what had caused such an immediate dislike between the two.

_This is the first time they’ve met. Why is there such coldness between them. It almost feels like...hostility!_

”Come on Zhan-ge,” Yibo didn't let go of Zhan’s wrist as he positioned him in front of the mirror. “I’ll help you.”


	37. Say something

* * *

Zhan couldn't breathe. Yibo’s hands were on his shoulders, his arms, his hips, his knees as he placed each of Zhan’s body parts in the right position. 

_All I want to do is spin around and push Yibo against the mirror and kiss him senseless. I want to feel Yibo's body heat burn me until he reduces me to ashes. I want to taste every inch of Yibo and I want him to taste every inch of me. I want those big hands wrapped around my..._

”Do the movement slowly, ge,” Yibo's voice interrupted Zhan's thoughts. “And move your arms and legs to these positions. Okay?”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded, almost breathless. 

”Alright, let’s do it together. Slowly. Just like we used to during shooting.” Yibo stood behind him slightly off to one side, smiling.

”Yeah,” Zhan recovered from his tortured shock and smiled back, “just like old times.”

For the next several minutes, Yibo counted slowly and did the step alongside Zhan. With each try, he increased the pace of his counting by a little. 

”Better,” Yibo nodded. “You’re getting it. Wanna try with the music?”

Zhan nodded and walked back to the group who were rehearsing the next sections of the same song.

”Hey guys...sorry but can we go back to this section? I think I finally got it.”

Everyone got into formation as Yibo crossed his arms across his chest and leaned against the wall. When the music began, he tapped his foot along with the beat and watched Zhan. He gulped as desire took over his entire body. He lusted after every move Zhan made. With every undulation, Yibo gasped inwardly.

_God, I just want to push him down to the ground and bite his lips until they turn red. I want to lick him all over and taste his sweat. I want to feel his bare skin against mine. I want to kiss him everywhere and wrap my lips around his..._

Yibo's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Zhan counting outloud. When the difficult section came, he watched as Zhan nailed the move he was previously struggling with. 

”You got it!” Yibo exclaimed when the music stopped and walked over.

”Yes!!” Zhan nodded beaming, and stepped forward raising his hand up to high five Yibo.

”Good job,” ChuYue called out and gave a slight nod to Yibo who nodded back lightly.

The rest of the song went by smoothly and finally it was time for the last song.

”They should be here by now,” ChuYue frowned and looked at the clock.

”Who?” Yibo leaned towards Zhan who was sitting beside him.

”For this last song, we are going to be dancing with…”

Before he could finish his sentence, the door opened and in walked four girls. Dressed in short shorts and tank tops, they walked in confidently and waved at the boys.

”Good...you’re here,” ChuYue waved back. “Alright, Zhan-Zhan. Ready for this? Time to get sexy!” He chuckled with a smirk.

Zhan rolled his eyes and joined the group once more.

”How can I dare to be sexy in front of the incomparable Wang Yibo!” Zhan smirked and eyed Yibo.

Yibo didn't say a word and just threw an unimpressed look at Zhan. He watched for the next thirty minutes as Zhan danced with his female partner - fingers flitting about her in a flirting and suggestive manner, bodies rolling and swaying seductively, hands following the curve of her body as she dipped and rolled her ass.

His eyes opened wide and his breath hitched when Zhan held her hand and drew her closer, wrapping her hands around his neck. Yibo only let out his breath when she pushed him back by the chest and walked away. Yibo swallowed his emotions which were a chaotic mix of anger, irritation, hurt, jealousy, possessiveness, and so many things.

Eventually, after repeating the choreography several more times, Zhan made his way to Yibo.

”Get up,” he offered him his hand. “I’m done for today.”

* * *

Yibo was unusually quiet during the car ride back to Zhan’s apartment.

”Are you okay?” Zhan asked finally. “Are you tired? Jet lag?”

”Guess so,” Yibo shrugged.

Zhan didn't prod further but couldn't shake the feeling off that something was bothering Yibo. He decided to bring it up once they were actually in the apartment.

”So what’s your schedule like tomorrow?” Zhan tried distracting him.

”Start shooting for One More Try,” Yibo replied briefly.

_He has never been like this around me._ Zhan thought nervously. _What should I do?!_

Soon, they reached his apartment and once inside, Yibo trudged over to the couch and plonked himself down. He started a video game and was engrossed in it as if Zhan was not present in the room.

”Umm...I’m going to take a quick shower.”

Yibo nodded without taking his eyes off the game.

When Zhan came out of the shower, Yibo was still playing the game with a blank expression on his face. 

”Wanna order food? I’m famished.” Zhan sat beside Yibo.

”Actually,” Yibo put the controller down and stood up, “I think I’ll head home. Kind of tired.

Zhan watched in confusion as Yibo began putting his shoes on. His bewilderment turned into an irritated frown as Yibo gathered his things silently and made his way to the door. The irritation then turned into anger and he stomped towards Yibo and grabbed him roughly by the arm.

”Are you really just going to leave like everything’s normal, just like this, without saying bye?!”

”Ge,” Yibo flinched. “I…”

”You what? You thought you could just leave and I wouldn't notice how weird you’ve been behaving since we left my rehearsal? You didn't talk to me the entire car ride, you’ve not been smiling, you’ve barely looked at me since we reached home, and you just got up and took your things to leave...just like that...without saying a proper bye?!” Zhan’s voice rose with every accusation.

Yibo shrinked at the sight of Zhan’s angry face. He had never seen Zhan angry before. He had never known this side of Zhan. And no matter how much he wanted to, he couldn't deny any of the facts Zhan had just stated.

_How do I tell you what I‘m feeling right now, Zhan-ge._ Yibo thought. _How do I tell you how jealous I’ve been all day. How miserable it made me seeing someone else touch you, seeing you touch someone else?!_

”Say something, Wang Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed harshly as he inched closer, backing Yibo against the door.


	38. Isn't it different with me

* * *

”Ge...I…”

Seeing the scared look on Yibo’s face, Zhan calmed down a little.

”What’s the matter, Bo-di.” He spoke softly. “If something’s bothering you, talk to me. Don’t just shut me out and run away.”

”It’s nothing…”

”Don’t lie to me.”

”It’s silly.

”If it’s upsetting you, it can't be silly. Now,” Zhan held Yibo’s hand and walked them back to the couch. “Tell me what’s the matter.”

Yibo looked at his feet, his mind racing trying to come up with some explanation without telling Zhan the true reason behind his behavior.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo mumbled, “I just…”

Seeing Yibo’s hesitance, Zhan gently rubbed the back of his hand with his thumb.

”Was it something to do with Peng ChuYue?” Zhan asked when Yibo didn't say anything more. “I noticed you two behaving very coldly towards each other.”

”You...you noticed that?” Yibo looked up shocked.

”Yeah,” Zhan chuckled. “You two weren’t being very subtle you know. What was that about?”

”I just...I felt uncomfortable around some of your band mates.”

”Did they do something? Or were you just feeling overwhelmed around so many new people?”

”I...i think...maybe just overwhelmed.”

Zhan sat back properly and narrowed his eyes on Yibo.

”No,” Zhan said. “That’s not it. You’re not telling me the truth, Yibo.”

Yibo sighed and turned to face Zhan, embarrassed and nervous.

”It’s going to sound really silly. But I just...I wasn't comfortable with the way some of them were….manhandling you. There’s something called personal boundaries, you know.”

Zhan blinked at Yibo speechless. He stared at the boy who seemed sincere and worried. Before he could control himself, Zhan burst into laughter. He couldn't stop himself from leaning back, bawling his eyes out, clutching his sides.

”Zhan-ge? What’s so funny...I told you...I told you it’s silly.” Yibo pouted and got up once again.

Zhan grabbed his hand and yanked him back down on the couch.

”Yibo you are unbelievable!” Zhan wiped the tears that were flowing out the corners of his eyes. “Of all the people, I can't believe you are talking about personal boundaries when you hit and tease me all the time!!”

”That’s different, ge!” Yibo replied in an irritated tone.

”How is that different?! You manhandled me too when you were teaching me the step!!” Zhan frowned.

”Isn't it different with me? Am I not different from them?”

Zhan calmed down immediately at Yibo’s tone and the expression on his face as if someone had kicked a little puppy.

”Oh my god, Yibo! You’re even more clingy than my cat!” Zhan gasped and shook his head. 

I am not clingy!” Yibo replied in an angry tone.

"And you’re one to talk!" Zhan’s voice grew irritated as well. “I have seen videos of you and your band mates literally frolicking around on top of each other, hugging, even kissing!!”

”That was long ago!” Yibo grew defensive and desperate to clear things up with Zhan. “I wouldn't do that now. That was before I met you…I mean, I was young back then. I wouldn't behave that way now.”

”Why? Because you have a girlfriend?” Zhan blurted out as his irritation finally broke free from his control.

”What?” Yibo scrunched his eyebrows, confused. 

”Nothing,” Zhan cleared his throat.

He walked to the kitchen and poured himself a glass of water to distract himself from the conversation that had somehow spiralled into something else. After a few seconds, Yibo made his way to the kitchen and stood in the doorway.

”What did you say?”

Zhan felt the anger he had experienced when he saw the news article rise in him again. Without turning to look at Yibo, he filled himself another glass of water.

”You said you wouldn't behave that way now. Why? Is it because you have a girlfriend?”

”You saw that stupid article?”

”How could I not? It was all over Weibo. Should I be congratulating you?” Zhan replied with a blank face, still looking away from Yibo.

”It’s a silly gossip piece. You know how these things work, don't you?” Yibo spoke softly. “Don't you?” He repeated when Zhan didn't respond or move.

After several seconds of silence, Zhan turned to face Yibo and let out a husky laugh.

”Why are we even discussing all this?” He feigned another chuckle. “I just wanted to know why you seemed off suddenly. How did we even get to this…,” Zhan shook his head with a half hearted smile as he tried to make his way past Yibo who still stood blocking the doorway.

Yibo didn't budge. Instead, he cornered Zhan into the space between the wall and the doorway, his eyes never flinching from Zhan. Zhan inched backwards into the wall, uncomfortable under the intense stare he was at the receiving end of. For what seemed like hours, Yibo didn't say anything and Zhan couldn't find any words to throw at him either. Finally, Zhan sighed and put his hand on Yibo’s chest to push him away.

”It’s late, Yibo...and I’m tired…”

Yibo didn't move. His eyes searched Zhan’s for something.

 _Oh god, I can't handle his intense stares._ Zhan groaned inwardly. _Wait..._

Zhan’s mind rewinded back to something Yibo said. 

_’I wouldn't do that now. That was before I met you…’_

_Did he...did Yibo actually say that or am I imagining things?! What does that mean? Does it mean what I think it means? Could it be...is Yibo...does he…_


	39. I want him to want me

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo bit his lip.

”What?” Zhan replied softly, looking down, having long given up trying to push Yibo back.

”I…”

”You what?” Zhan looked up at Yibo expectantly.

_Careful, Yibo. I can’t do anything that will drive Zhan-ge away. I can't imagine my life without him._

__

”I…,” Yibo muttered and then moved back a few inches, “I tell you everything, ge. Obviously, those stupid gossip sites are making this up.”

__

”Oh,” Zhan’s shoulders dropped as Yibo took another step back. “Yeah...they’re trash. I was just...I was just teasing. Sorry.”

__

”I should be the one apologizing. I overreacted about the whole band mates personal boundaries thing. I didn't mean to...cross a line…”

__

”You didn’t,” Zhan sighed but managed a smile. “We’re both...just tired. But even with...all this...I had fun. I’m glad you chose to spend your free time with me, Bo-di.”

__

”Me too,” Yibo smiled.

__

”So…,” Zhan grinned as he leaned back against the wall, “about that dinner…shall we order finally?”

__

”No, ge,” Yibo said meekly, “I think...I think I should go...plus your movie shooting begins tomorrow. You should rest. And you fly out early in the morning too.” 

__

”Oh,” Zhan’s smile vanished. “Alright, if you need to go…”

__

Yibo’s heart melted as he saw the innocent face Zhan made trying to hide his disappointment. He wanted to stay. In fact, he never wanted to leave. But it was beginning to get really hard. All the self restraint had begun taking a toll on him. He never wanted to be the reason Zhan got upset or angry. He didn't want them to ever come this close to fighting as they had that night.

__

On hearing Zhan’s words about the gossip article, a tiny hope had flared up in Yibo and he had searched Zhan’s eyes for something. Anything. A sign that maybe he was in the same boat as him. That maybe he was affected by the girlfriend rumors the same way Yibo had been affected by the manhandling and couple dancing today. But he had only found confusion and exasperation. 

__

”Yeah, I kind of do need to,” Yibo managed to reply, willing himself to hold back his tears.

__

”And you’re sure you’re still not upset?” Zhan inquired.

__

Yibo leaned against the kitchen counter and looked at the ground.

__

”Yeah…,” he looked up at Zhan who raised an eyebrow at him. “I’ll be fine.”

__

As Zhan stood at his door watching Yibo put his shoes on, he gazed at the boy longingly.

__

_I wish you could stay forever. I wish I could come home to you and not an empty apartment._

__

When Yibo stood up to leave, Zhan gave him a soft but sad smile. To his surprise and joy, Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and pulled him into a hug.

__

”Bye, Zhan-ge…we’ll see each other soon...”

__

”Yes, we will, didi,” Zhan smiled and gently massaged Yibo’s back soothingly.

__

* * *

__

Zhan couldn't sleep. The more his mind went over every interaction between him and Yibo, the more he was convinced that there was something simmering just under the surface. The only way to find out what it is, was to be brave and dive in.

_Who asks their friend to not let them go?! Who corners a friend against a wall and stares intensely at them!? Who hugs and touches a friend so longingly?! What friend gets affected by their friend being ‘manhandled’ by their bandmates!? What kind of friend shows up at your home directly after a long flight and two weeks of non stop shooting? That too bearing gifts?!_

__

Zhan groaned and rolled over.

__

_Maybe I’m reading too much into this! Yibo isn't gay! But...how can I be sure? Up until I met him, I didn't think I was gay! But what if I’m only seeing the things I want to see? What if I’m horribly wrong about all this? Then I’ll lose my best friend._

__

Zhan sat up with another long groan.

__

”Fuck my life!” He screamed

__

* * *

__

When Yibo reached home, he face-planted into his bed. 

__

”That was too close. You almost made yourself obvious. You need to watch yourself!!!!!” Yibo screamed into the pillow.

__

”Get this in your head,” he sat up and spoke sternly to himself. “Xiao Zhan isn't gay.”

__

”But I love him,” Yibo groaned and lay back on the bed, clutching his pillow to his chest. “I want him. I want him to want me. I want him to love me.”

__

The next morning Yibo woke up to a text message.

__

> __
> 
> _Zhan-ge: I’m off for the on-location shoot for Jade Dynasty, Bo-di!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m so excited and terrified…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Also, network will be patchy there  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: See you soon, didi _
> 
> __

_  
_

Yibo sighed and sat up against the headboard.

__

> __
> 
> _Yibo: Have a safe flight, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: You’ll do amazing. _
> 
> __

_  
_

* * *

__

To Yibo it felt like the two weeks passed by slowly and super quickly. He was so busy with work that he wouldn’t realize when morning would become night. But when he would return home at night, the night would drag on and morning would take forever to come. He would toss and turn, his mind constantly returning to when Zhan had wrapped himself around him and slept. And when morning would finally come, the same cycle would repeat all over again. 

__

True to his words, Zhan’s messages were few and far apart. Each time he did message, it always began with an apology for the shitty network, followed by hasty updates about the shoot and questions about Yibo’s work and wellbeing. They never failed to bring a smile to Yibo’s face even if he resented the scarcity of them.

__

The distance had helped him calm down as well. He had been able to pull himself back from the edge he had been driven to when he spent the day with Zhan. He was able to reason with himself to behave rationally and within his limits. He had been able to suppress all his lustful desires until one day, he came across an old video of Zhan performing at a 2017 X-Nine concert.

__

”What the…,” Yibo gasped as he saw Zhan in black trousers, a white half tucked shirt with several buttons undone, and a black tie that hung loose from his collar. 

__

As Zhan walked across stage, eyes smouldering, Yibo felt his breathing becoming heavier. With each step, Yibo swallowed as he felt heat spread through his body. When Zhan’s hands moved down his chest, Yibo’s hand slid down his body. When Zhan’s body rolled sensually, Yibo’s hips shuffled impatiently as his hand made its way into his pants.

__

When Zhan’s hand rested at his crotch as he moved side to side erotically, Yibo’s hand pressed down against his dick. Yibo groaned at the sensation as he imagined Zhan’s small soft hands on him. Yibo watched as Zhan’s hair got more and more messed up with each move and imagined his hands clutching Zhan’s hair as Zhan’s plush lips slid down Yibo’s chest, making their way lower and lower. 

__

When Zhan undid his tie and Yibo saw his exposed chest, his grip on his dick tightened as he moved his hand up and down his shaft. With each of Zhan’s thrust, Yibo increased his pace. With each glimpse of Zhan’s happy trail, Yibo’s dick grew harder and harder as he imagined what lay at the end of that trail. 

__

Zhan’s body swayed seductively on a chair and then humped the ground, making Yibo’s hip thrust up into his hand, imagining Zhan doing the same moves on top of him. When Zhan bit his lips, Yibo’s tongue licked his own as he imagined him biting those lips instead. Watching Zhan’s legs spread open wide, leaning back against the chair, Yibo began thrusting, rubbing, yanking, pressing, groaning louder with each passing second.

__

He could feel the heat radiate from his groin, his skin growing sensitive with each wave of pleasure. His eyes remained glued on Zhan and with each smirk, he felt himself raging closer to the finish line. The next shot was a close up of Zhan and Zhan found the camera. He gazed straight into it and Yibo finally came with one final tug and threw his head back as images of Zhan coming with him filled his mind.

__

When he looked back at his phone, the performance had ended and Zhan sat there, panting, sweating, looking as ravished and messed up as Yibo felt. Yibo caught his breath and was about to reach out for a tissue when his phone sprung to life.

__

Startled, Yibo dropped his phone and jerked up, fumbling for the tissue to clean himself. He glanced at the screen from the corner of his eyes and froze mid way as he saw Zhan’s name light up the screen in a video call.

__

Hurrying, Yibo grabbed the phone and accepted the call.

__

”Bo-di!” Zhan’s cheerful voice crackled through.

__

”Zha...Zhan-ge,” Yibo stuttered. “How..”

__

”Yibo, are you okay? You look…”

__

”I’m fine..I was just...dancing.”

__

”Oh...did I disturb you? I can call later…”

__

”No no, ge! I’m...done,” Yibo cleared his throat as his hand adjusted the blanket all around him. “I...I can talk…”

__

Zhan flashed a smile and began chattering about his day but all Yibo could focus on was the mole below his lip. He felt flustered and hot as he watched the face he had just been touching himself to.

__

_Oh god…focus, Yibo...what the fuck...did I just masturbate to Zhan-ge…_

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay with me until the next chapter. I promise you won't regret it!


	40. I already have your gift

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Realized only after writing 50 chapters, that I forgot to include a chapter for Zhan's birthday which Yibo celebrated with him at this point of time in the story. So, for my own sanity, adding a filler chapter in the middle to cover that event. It's not too great content wise but the missing gap would have driven me crazy!!

* * *

When Zhan was done with his shoot, Yibo was too busy to meet immediately. He would be back in town only after a few days and Zhan hated the fact that he had to wait longer to see Yibo. Sulking, he looked over his own schedule for the rest of September. He had some auditions lined up and more rehearsals for the Hangzhou concert.

> _Bo-di: Hi, Zhan-ge! You’re back?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yep, just home. Half asleep _😴 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Oh, you should rest.  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah, have rehearsals again from tomorrow. _

Yibo frowned as the mention of rehearsals reminded him of their last conversation that had nearly turned into a fight.

_Control yourself, Yibo. He is not your boyfriend. Don't get all possessive again. I don't ever want to make Zhan-ge angry again._

> _Bo-di: Good luck, ge! Isn’t the concert in December?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah but we have a small one in October too in Hangzhou.  
>    
>  Bo-di: When in October?  
>    
>  Zhan: On the 4th.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Oh, that’s just before your birthday…  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah 😫  
>    
>  Zhan: Anyway, I’m going to sleep, Bo-di. _

* * *

Just like that, a few more weeks passed by and Yibo was now standing in front of Zhan’s apartment in the corridor with Wang Zhoucheng and Xuan Lu.

”Where is he?” Zhoucheng asked for the fourth time prompting both Xuan Lu and Yibo to roll their eyes.

”Shut up, man!” Yibo groaned. “I told you Zhan-ge told me he’d be reaching his apartment soon. Their flight landed in Beijing a few hours back. He should be here any minute.”

”Shh,” Xuan Lu suddenly interrupted them. “I think the elevator just pinged.”

The three of them waited with bated breath as soft footsteps approached them. A few seconds later, a yawning Zhan appeared from around the corner. On seeing the three expectant faces, Zhan froze mid yawn.

”Yibo?” Zhan’s eyes widened. “Shijie? Zhoucheng!?? What are…”

Before he could finish, Xuan Lu raised her arms and laughed.

”Surprise!!!” She nudged both Zhoucheng and Yibo, “Happy birthday!!” They exclaimed in unison. 

”Happy birthday, Xian-Xian!” Xuan Lu rushed forward and hugged the bewildered Zhan.

”We got you cake!” Zhoucheng held up a bag excitedly. 

”Okay, let’s go inside so Zhan-ge can catch his breath,” Yibo chuckled and took Zhan by the arm and led him to the door.

Zhan stared at each of them, still somewhat astonished, and fumbled for his keys. Once inside he put his bag down and only then did it began sinking in.

”Wow, you guys,” he smiled brightly. “I had no idea…”

”That’s how surprises work, Zhan-ge!” Zhoucheng laughed and put the cake down.

Zhan gasped as he saw the design. It was a ‘Little Prince’ cake. He giggled as he saw each detail in the cake and looked up at Yibo, immediately knowing it was his idea. Yibo rubbed the back of his neck with a grin and stretched his hand out. Zhan noticed only then that he was holding two balloons.

”Happy birthday, ge,” Yibo handed them to Zhan.

”Thanks,” Zhan smiled back.

”Alright, let’s cut some cake!!” Zhoucheng looked around. “Where can we find a knife?”

”That’s usually in the kitchen,” Yibo snorted and made his way inside.

Within a second, he emerged from the kitchen holding a knife in his hand.

”Well that was...fast,” Xuan Lu noted quietly as she set up the cake.

Zhan glanced at her and she gave him a small smile. Something in the smile made Zhan swallow his breath. But soon, he was distracted by the knife that was placed in his hand and the singing and cheering.

Zhan closed his eyes and made a silent prayer, thanking the universe for everything it had given him so far and asked it to take care of all his loved ones. When he opened his eyes, they landed on Yibo who stood opposite them, recording everything on his phone. 

Zhan smiled back at Yibo who peeked out from behind the phone.

”Cut the cake, ge!” Yibo gestured.

Zhan took in a deep breath and did as he was told. He took a slice out and held it up looking at the three of them and then at Xuan Lu.

”Come on, Yibo…,” she pushed him from behind towards Zhan. “This was all his idea…,” she smiled and winked at Zhan.

With a warm smile, Zhan stepped forward and gave Yibo the first bite. Yibo took Zhan’s hand in his and turned it around to offer him the next bite, which Zhan gladly took.

”Thank you, Bo-di,” Zhan murmured. “It’s a beautiful cake.”

”Happy birthday, Zhan-ge,” Yibo beamed.

Zhan took the cake over to Zhoucheng and Xuan Lu and offered them both a bite as well. Once the celebrations were done and selfies were clicked on Xuan Lu’s insistence, everyone helped Zhan clean up. 

”Sorry to bail so early, but we need to head back,” Xuan Lu sighed as she gathered her things.

”That’s fine, shijie! I’m so glad you all came over. This means a lot!”

”Xian-Xian!” Xuan Lu reached out and pulled Zhan into a hug. “We need to do this again, with the whole cast. I miss us hanging out.”

Zhan felt a warmth spread across his chest. He leaned into the hug a little before pulling back. He could feel tears well up at the back of his eyes. Xuan Lu smiled and touched his cheek. She patted him softly before finally letting go and heading out.

”Bye, Zhan-ge,” Zhoucheng smiled and hugged Zhan. “Let’s go to that ice rink you told me about sometime.”

”Oh, yes!” Zhan brightened up. “We should. I’ll be in town for a few days before heading out to finish Joy of Life. We can go before I leave if that works?”

Zhoucheng and Xuan Lu nodded excitedly.

”We can make a day of it...there’s a Naruto exhibit near that and we could have lunch at my favorite place too!” Xuan Lu exclaimed. “Yibo?”

”Huh?” Yibo stood up from where he was leaning against the wall quietly watching the trio. “I...I won't be in town for a few weeks but maybe some other time?” He scratched his head, grinning.

”Okay, maybe Zhan can take you out himself when you’re back,” she smirked.

Before Zhan could think too much about her words, Zhoucheng and Xuan Lu said one final goodbye and left.

”So…,” Zhan spoke as he turned around and looked at Yibo. “Thank you for all this!”

”Stop thanking me, ge!” Yibo scowled. “Plus, I forgot to bring your gift.”

”I already have your gift,” Zhan smiled and walked towards him.

”You do?” Yibo asked, confused.

Zhan grinned as he pulled out a chain from under his shirt. Yibo smiled as he realized it was the necklace he bought for Zhan from Canada with the three little prince pendants dangling happily from it.

”You’re wearing it,” Yibo said softly.

”Of course,” Zhan’s eyes crinkled as his smile widened.

Losing the fight against himself, Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan and pulled him into a tight hug.

”Happy birthday, Zhan-ge. I’m so glad you were born.”

Zhan giggled and tightened the hug.

After several minutes, Yibo spoke again.

”Looks like our schedules are going to be packed for the next few weeks?”

”Looks like it,” Zhan pulled back and sat on the couch.

He pulled out his phone and opened his calendar. He patted the space beside him and Yibo sat down, opening his own calendar. They held their phones side by side and swiped in sync, scrolling through each other’s schedules. Their faces turned into frowns pretty soon as they kept scrolling all the way to the third week of October.

”Looks like that’s it,” Zhan bit his cheek. “We’ll be in the same city again then.”

”That’s two and half weeks away.”

”Sucks,” Zhan shrugged as he leaned back. “At least I got to spend my birthday with you...with you all,” he added hurriedly.

”Hmm,” Yibo leaned back as well, resting his head against the couch. 

Both remained silent for a few seconds and then turned to face each other.

_I don't want to leave, Zhan-ge. But if I don’t, I don't know how much longer I’ll be able to keep my feelings in check._

”I think I should leave now. I have an early morning tomorrow.” Yibo sighed.

”Oh..okay..,” Zhan nodded and stood up.

”I...I wish I could spend more time…,” Yibo added hastily.

”I know, Bo-di,” Zhan smiled and placed a hand lightly on his cheek.

Zhan pulled him into another hug and held him gently, savoring every second.


	41. Please don't hate me for this

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Just done with work. I'm on my way, Bo-di!  
>    
>  Yibo: See you soon, ge.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Do you want me to bring something?  
>    
>  Yibo: Just bring your beautiful self, Xiao-laoshi!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yibo!! _

* * *

Yibo ran around straightening, cleaning, arranging. He hadn't seen Zhan for over two weeks and every fiber of his being was brimming with excitement now. In another ten minutes, Zhan would reach his apartment and he still hadn’t showered. He dashed into the bathroom and took the quickest shower of his life. Just as he stepped out, he heard a loud knock on his door.

He threw a shirt on and hopped to the door, one leg still outside the pyjamas.

”Just a sec, Zhan-ge…,” he struggled to get the leg in. “I...I’ll open..just a sec.

Finally, when he was able to put on the pants, he turned the knob and flung the door open. Outside, Zhan stood with pursed lips, as if he had been waiting for a while.

”Finally!” Zhan exclaimed and barged in. “I thought you would never open that door.”

”Sorry, ge.” Yibo responded sheepishly. “I was in the shower.”

”Hi…,” Zhan put his jacket on the hanger and smiled at Yibo.

”Hi…,” Yibo grinned and shut the door behind him.

Zhan hesitated for a bit but then stepped towards Yibo and wrapped his arms around Yibo. He sighed and rested his forehead on his shoulder. Yibo felt a certain heaviness radiating from Zhan and placed his hands on his waist and pulled him closer. 

”Zhan-ge?”

Zhan didn't say anything.

”Is everything okay?” Yibo pulled away a little but didn't let go.

”I’m just exhausted.” Zhan bit his lip and gave him a small smile.

”We really need to stop saying that to each other if something’s wrong,” Yibo frowned and pulled back a little more.

Zhan nodded and leaned against the back of the couch in the living room. He crossed his arms in front of his chest. After several seconds he looked away and his fingers fiddled with his collar.

Yibo felt his breath catch as his mind went back to the video of Zhan dancing with an open collar, chest exposed, tie hanging loose. His eyes wandered down Zhan’s nervous lips to the fingers that played with the fabric at his collar, teasingly exposing his neck with each tug. 

”Things have gotten worse,” Zhan spoke finally, “...with Wajijiwa.”

Yibo’s eyes snapped to Zhan’s face, all lustful thoughts replaced by a frown and deep concern.

”What happened?”

”It’s getting too much. I lost out on several auditions and the pay has been...problematic.”

”Are they still not paying you properly?”

”Among other issues.” Zhan nodded slowly. “Lack of support...sometimes no team to help me out...I don't know what I should do.”

”Let’s have dinner first?” Yibo smiled and led Zhan by the elbow. “I ordered your favorite.”

As they ate together, Zhan opened up about the stress he felt. Yibo listened silently, his temper rising with every sentence. Eventually, Yibo put his chopsticks down with force and reached out and held Zhan’s wrist. Zhan paused his chewing and looked at Yibo. Slowly, he placed his chopstick down and let Yibo slide his hand down to hold his hand.

”Let me help.” Yibo stated bluntly.

”Always so direct, Bo-di,” Zhan chuckled and shook his head. “I’ll be fine, it’s just…”

”Let me help,” Yibo repeated and tightened his grip. “I can...give you a small team...a car...a bodyguard...it will be temporary...please.”

”That’s sweet, didi,” Zhan smiled and placed his hand on top of Yibo’s, “but I’ll manage. It means a lot though.”

”I want to be the one you turn to when you need help, ge!!” Yibo blurted loudly. 

Zhan froze. His hand stilled and he didn't know what to say. Something in Yibo’s voice made his heart race. Yibo’s words sounded like a confession but he couldn't be sure what he was confessing. A part of his heart soared thinking that Yibo was saying what he was dying to hear. But another part of him, the part that was too scared of rejection and of losing his friend, told him to not be delusional.

”Please, ge,” Yibo spoke with pleading eyes. “Let me…”

_Fuck it._ Zhan thought.

He stood up and made his way to Yibo. He yanked him up by the shoulder and pulled him into a tight embrace. He pulled him in until there was no more gap between them. He turned his face into the crook of Yibo’s neck. 

”Thank you, Wang Yibo.” 

Yibo’s mind raced as several urges flashed through his head.

_Why does this feel like more than friendship? Why does it feel like there is something on both sides?_

Zhan lifted his head up and looked into Yibo’s eyes.

”Can I ask you something, Bo-di?” 

”Hmm…,” Yibo brushed some strands of hair aside on Zhan’s forehead.

”I...this…,” Zhan stuttered for a few seconds.

”Ge…,” Yibo massaged his back as he waited patiently.

Something snapped into place in that moment. Zhan connected the dots and felt as if his soul had left his body and was staring down at them from above. He saw Yibo holding him gently. He saw himself, standing in the embrace, comfortable and secure.

_Don’t let this love go without even trying, Zhan._

”Wang Yibo…,” Zhan took a deep breath and placed his hands on Yibo’s soft cheeks. 

Yibo’s hand stilled on Zhan’s back and he felt an energy erupt all around him.

”I...I don't know how to say this...without scaring you away…,” Zhan spoke slowly and calmly, “...but I have to say it...but I don't know how...so...please don't hate me for this…” 

With those words, Zhan pulled Yibo closer by his face and placed his lips lightly on Yibo’s cheek. Yibo’s eyes opened wide as Zhan moved his lips to plant a kiss on his other cheek as well. Yibo’s breathing became heavier as Zhan pulled back and lingered mere inches from his face. 

”Bo-di…,” Zhan whispered, his lips tantalizing close.

”Ge…,” Yibo whispered back, his eyes focussed on Zhan’s.

”I think...I’ve fallen in love with you.”


	42. A big miscalculation

* * *

Yibo felt a shiver run up his spine as he felt Zhan’s soft lips leave a warm trail on both his cheeks..

”Bo-di…,” Zhan whispered, his lips tantalizing close.

”Ge…,” Yibo whispered back, his eyes focused on Zhan’s eyes.

”I think...I’ve fallen in love with you.”

Yibo’s brain shut down.

”Bo-di…?” Zhan spoke hesitantly. 

Yibo’s entire body went numb. Zhan saw his blank expression and froze. He took a step back and released Yibo. Zhan’s heart dropped to his feet as he grew horrified. He kept taking steps back as he saw Yibo’s face turn cold, his eyes and expression giving nothing away. Yibo seemed as mortified as Zhan.

”I’m...I’m sorry...I shouldn’t have...I know you probably don't...this was a big mistake!” Zhan retreated further.

Yibo’s eyes couldn't focus on anything. Everything was blurry and the world around him seemed to move in slow motion.

”I think I should leave…,” Zhan muttered as he grabbed his bag and hurried towards the door.

It was when he heard the door shut that Yibo snapped out of his daze. His hands found their way to his cheeks and he caressed the skin, still dazed. 

_Zhan-ge._ His mind was reeling. _Zhan-ge._ His mind was stuck in a loop.

”Zhan-ge…,” he whispered.

He looked around and his brain rebooted when he realized he was alone.

”Zhan-ge? Zhan-ge!!” 

He turned around hastily and rushed out. Just as he turned the corner in the corridor, he saw the elevator doors close and the lift headed down. 

”Shit. Shit. Shit!” Yibo gasped as he pressed the button repeatedly.

Groaning, he ran his hand through his hair and ran to the stairway. As he leaped down the stairs, his mind and lips kept repeating one line over and over again.

”What the fuck is wrong with you, Wang Yibo!!!!”

* * *

Zhan ran out of the building and got into his car. He turned the key in the ignition and with his hands still shaking, he drove himself as far away from Yibo’s building as possible. When he had put sufficient distance between him and it, Zhan stopped the car inside a dark alleyway. He rested his head against the steering wheel and let the tears he had been holding in gush out. After several minutes of sobbing, he sat back up and wiped his cheeks, breathless. With a long exhale, Zhan leaned back and closed his eyes.

”Great...just great.” Zhan muttered as more tears began to flow. 

”That was a big miscalculation. Yibo’s never going to want to see me again. What have I done?!?!

He stayed still for several seconds, trying to calm his mind down. He had no idea what to do next. He had no idea how to handle this situation. He had no idea how to recover from this. He had no idea how to not lose his best friend. 

”Yibo…,” he called out to the emptiness around him.

* * *

Yibo ran around the parking lot but Zhan’s car was nowhere in sight. He jumped onto his bike and within the blink of an eye, raced out of the building. As he made his way towards Zhan’s home, his eyes darted about for any sign of Zhan’s car. Each time he thought he saw a similar car, he screeched to a halt and rushed to peek inside but to no avail.

”You fucking idiot,” Yibo growled as he got back on his bike after checking the third car. “You total fucking moron. How could you let him go? What must he be thinking?!

Yibo sighed and with a kick of his leg and flick of his wrist, raced towards Zhan’s home. Once there, he parked outside the building and waited. He waited and waited and waited. Ten minutes, twenty minutes, thirty minutes and still no sign of Zhan.

Yibo did a round around the building but could not spot Zhan’s car anywhere. He went up to his apartment and knocked and rang the bell and knocked some more. No reply. The lights were off as far as he could tell. He returned and leaned against his bike taking his phone out.

”Fuck!! My phone’s dead. Of course it’s dead,” Yibo groaned.

Another twenty minutes passed and Yibo grew restless and impatient.

”Where are you, Zhan-ge?!” He punched the seat. “Where are you!!”

After a few more minutes, Yibo had a sudden thought.

”Maybe...maybe he went back to my apartment?”

Yibo bit his lower lip as he tried to decide what to do next.

I’ll wait for another ten minutes…,” Yibo paced back and forth, eyes glued on the gate.

When Zhan didn't show up after a whole hour, Yibo jumped back on his bike and made his way to his apartment. The night had turned chilly and he had forgotten to bring his jacket or helmet. He went back and forth between the parking lot, the lounge in his building, and his apartment floor. But there was no sign of Zhan. Finally, he went in and charged his phone. As soon as it turned back on, he dialed Zhan’s number furiously. There were no new messages. No missed calls. No voicemails. No matter how many times Yibo called, the same message greeted him from the other end of the line. 

_’The number you have dialed is switched off. Please try again later.’_

Frustrated, Yibo stood on his balcony eyeing the gate.

”Please, ge...come back…”

* * *

Zhan could not find it in himself to move. He had no energy left after all the crying. His body refused to start the car and drive himself home. He wanted to sit there all night and not go home, not go anywhere, just hide in the dark and never show his face to Yibo ever again.

_He hasn't even messaged me yet. He must be so horrified. Maybe even pissed off. Why did you kiss his cheeks! You should have just said how you felt and explained yourself and let him process all of it. But no! You had to go ahead and fucking plant two kisses on your friend, who you don't know is gay or not, has feelings for you or not!!_

Zhan began typing a message, deleted it, typed again, deleted it again. Ultimately, he shut his phone off angrily and threw it aside. 

”What am I supposed to do now?” Zhan closed his eyes and muttered over and over again.

As Zhan’s words grew quiet, silence reigned once more. His sobs had ended, his tears had dried, his breaths became slow and steady once more, his body relaxed against the seat. Before Zhan knew it, he drifted off into a dreamless slumber.

A loud sound jerked Zhan awake and when he looked behind him, he saw a garbage truck making its early morning rounds. Zhan rubbed his eyes and dragged his hands down his face. When he started the car, his eyes opened wide at the time shining on his dashboard.

_4:30 am._

”Oh shit.” Zhan groaned. “Guess I have to go home some time and return to normal life. Whatever that is now. A life without Yibo.”

Zhan slowly started driving back out and made his way to his apartment. Half an hour later, he parked in his usual spot and dragged himself outside. He trudged towards the elevator and with a heavy heart, pressed the button to his floor. As the lift made its way up to the top floor, reality began to sink in. 

_What is happening. What did I do. Everything will change now. Nothing is going to remain the same._

Zhan emerged from the lift and walked down the long corridor. He turned the corner and froze as he saw the sight that awaited him. Yibo. On the floor. Leaning against his door. Asleep.


	43. Do it again

* * *

Instinctively, Zhan took a few steps back ready to turn back the way he came. He turned around the corner and was about to dart back to the elevator when a sudden thought occurred to him.

_Why is he here? After...what I did...I can't be a coward. I need to straighten things out with him. Maybe there’s a way we can still be friends after all this._

Zhan leaned around the corner a little and poked his head out. He stared at Yibo who was fast asleep. His heart jumped as he noticed how innocent and tired Yibo looked sleeping in that awkward position.

_He’s been waiting for me here all night. The least I can do is go there and face him. Whatever happens next, I need to face it head on._

”Come on, Zhan,” Zhan punched the air around him, trying to get some courage, “you can do this."

After several deep breaths, Zhan took small steps forward and kept walking until he reached his door. He gulped and fought every urge to run away again. Slowly, he kneeled down in front of Yibo and stretched his hand out to touch him but stopped himself.

_No! No contact. I can't make him awkward any more. I need to draw a nice big fat line that I can never cross again._

”Yibo,” Zhan called out instead, softly at first.

No response.

”Yibo…,” Zhan spoke louder.

Yibo stirred a little but didn't wake up.

”Yibo!!” Zhan clapped his hands near Yibo’s ear and exclaimed loud enough to startle the boy awake.

”Huh!?” Yibo jerked up, alarmed and disoriented.

Zhan stood up again and took a step back as the boy looked around confused and then trailed his eyes up to look at Zhan. For a few seconds it looked like Yibo had not figured out where he was and who the person in front of him was. But the moment he did, Zhan could see the realization in his eyes and looked away, unable to face him any longer.

Yibo jumped up, and rubbed his eyes and cleared his throat before taking a step towards Zhan.

”Zhan-ge, I…,” Yibo began but couldn't suppress a yawn. “Sorry, I…”

”Did you sleep here all night? You must be tired. Maybe you should…”

“Can we go inside?” Yibo interrupted him as he bit his lip and suppressed another yawn.

”Uh…,” Zhan still couldn't look up to meet Yibo’s gaze. “Sure…,” he said meekly.

He walked past Yibo who stepped aside, eyes still fixed on Zhan, and fumbled with his keys fully aware of Yibo’s intense gaze. After several tries, he managed to unlock the door and walked in.

Immediately, he took several steps in and put as much distance between him and Yibo as was acceptable without seeming rude. He had made up his mind that he wouldn't do anything to make Yibo uncomfortable again. He crossed his arms in front of his chest to avoid fidgeting with his fingers nervously. 

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo hesitated and took a few strides towards Zhan but on seeing Zhan back away involuntarily, he paused and let out a sigh.

_Look how scared you’ve made him feel. Stupid Yibo! Apologize to him right now!!!_

”I…,” Yibo began, “I’m sorry, Zhan-ge…”

_There it is._ Zhan thought dejectedly. _The rejection. At least he’s doing it in person like a mature guy. Come on, Zhan. You can do this. Be gracious. Don't ruin the friendship further._

”I’m sorry too, Yibo...I shouldn't have...you don't have to say anything more.” Zhan stared at his feet. “I understand. I...get it...it’s fine. I just hope nothing changes between...us. I’m so sorry for crossing the line. Can we move on and forget this ever happened?”

Yibo couldn't resist any longer. He closed the gap between them and stood right in front of Zhan.

”Look at me, Zhan-ge,” Yibo spoke softly.

Zhan swallowed his shame and met Yibo’s gaze.

”I can’t move on…”

”Oh…,” Zhan tried to reign in his tears.

_I’ve lost him forever._

”I’m sorry, Bo-di,” Zhan’s lips trembled with the effort it took to not break down. “I understand if you don't...can't be friends…” 

__

”Yeah...I can't be friends with you...I can't move on…I don't ever want to forget this happened.”

__

Zhan raised his eyebrows in confusion and his mind drew a blank, unable to come up with a response.

__

”So…,” Yibo continued as he lifted Zhan’s hand up to cheeks the same way he had back in Yibo’s apartment. “Do it again and this time, I’ll get it right.

__

”Wha...what?” Zhan stuttered bewildered. “Do...what?”

__

”Everything...everything you did and said back in my apartment. Please...do it again.

__

Zhan found himself spiralling, losing himself in Yibo’s eyes. Without even realizing it, he did as he was told.

__

”Bo-di…,” Zhan whispered, his entire body trembling.

__

”Ge…,” Yibo whispered back.

__

Yibo turned his face to one side and leaned forward, closer to Zhan’s lips. Zhan found himself leaning in too and realized a little too late that his lips had found Yibo’s cheek once again. Yibo turned his face to the other side and Zhan placed another soft kiss on his cheek. As Yibo turned back to face him, Zhan paused and a tear slid down his own cheek.

__

”I think...I’ve fallen in love with you.” Zhan shut his eyes tight, unable to take in and comprehend whatever was happening.

__

The next moment, he felt fingers wiping away his tears and massaging the back of his neck. Zhan felt the hands draw him closer and just when he managed to force his eyes open, a pair of lips placed themselves on his. 

The lips stayed still, pushing in ever so slightly to press against his. Zhan’s hands were still on Yibo’s cheeks. His eyes remained wide open as he felt Yibo’s lips touch his. He couldn't tell if it lasted for seconds or minutes or hours but when Yibo pulled back, he rested his forehead against Zhan’s and whispered gently.

”I love you too, ge…”


	44. A melody only they could hear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 5000 views, a 100 subscriptions, and so many lovely, encouraging, fun comments! I can't even. Thank you!

* * *

”I love you too, ge…”

Yibo pulled back a little to look at Zhan, whose eyes were still wide open. When he let go of him a little, Zhan’s hands dropped down and his arms hung limp by his sides. His lips were still frozen from the kiss and to Yibo, he looked like a rabbit caught in headlights. 

With a small smile, Yibo moved one hand down from Zhan’s neck to his lower back. The other hand slid down Zhan’s arm and lifted his hand, placing it on his chest, massaging it gently with his thumb.

”Zhan-ge?”

This time it was Zhan’s brain that had shut down.

”Ge?”

Zhan blinked cluelessly.

”Xiao Zhan…,” Yibo’s smile grew wider and he placed a kiss on Zhan’s nose.

That snapped Zhan out of his daze.

”Uhh...umm...Bo-di…,” Zhan stuttered as his eyes moved from Yibo’s face to his chest where his hand rested and then back to Yibo’s eyes.

”Did you hear what I said?” Yibo grinned nervously.

Zhan blinked some more and then nodded slowly.

”Did you understand what I said?” Yibo chuckled.

Zhan paused and then slowly nodded again.

”Are you going to say anything?” Yibo couldn't help but laugh more.

One look at Yibo’s genuine smile and Zhan melted. All his fears, doubts, confusion melted away. All that was left was a warm feeling in his chest that gradually radiated all throughout his body, eventually making its way up to his lips. Zhan broke out into a bright smile and, nodding, launched forward, wrapping himself around Yibo joyfully.

”I lied!” Zhan laughed.

”Huh?” Yibo raised an eyebrow even as he wrapped his arms tightly around Zhan.

”I lied!” Zhan exclaimed again before pulling back and laughing merrily. “I don't think I’ve fallen in love with you. I _know_ I’ve fallen in love with you!”

Before Yibo could respond, Zhan leaned forward and joined their lips once more. Zhan’s arms reached up Yibo’s back, pulling their bodies closer together. One of his hands made its way to the back of Yibo’s head, grabbing his hair and drawing him further in until their lips were pressed tightly. 

Zhan’s lips enveloped Yibo’s. He licked them as if they were the most delicious things in the world. Which, to him, they were. He sucked on his upper lip and then on the plump lower lip. With every taste, Zhan needed more. He tightened his grip on Yibo and dove further into the kiss,

Yibo was startled at first but then melted into the kiss. With every motion of Zhan’s lips, his own lips parted as he moaned and sighed. Zhan’s tongue made its way all around Yibo’s lips, impatient and passionate. Yibo opened his mouth a little to let his tongue inside and clutched the back of Zhan’s sweater as their lips blended into each other. He didn't know where his lips ended and where Zhan’s began.

When Yibo gasped, Zhan felt electricity run through his body. He bit Yibo’s lip, giving in to every urge he had been reigning in since the summer. He wanted to make sure Yibo felt all his pent up love and passion. 

”Aah…,” Yibo pulled back suddenly and whimpered. 

Zhan pulled back too, surprised and confused. But when he saw Yibo lick his lip, he realized what had happened. He had nicked Yibo’s lip and now a tiny red mark graced his lower lip, that was now swollen and shining wet.

”Oh my god! I’m sorry, Yibo!” Zhan’s eyes opened wide as Yibo touched the mark softly to check if there was blood.

”No,” Yibo shook his head and chuckled, “I’m okay...it’s fine...don’t stop…,” Yibo pulled Zhan close again to resume the kiss.

”Yibo!” Zhan pulled away and dragged him to the kitchen by his hand. “We need to ice it before it swells up completely!”

Once in the kitchen, Zhan opened the freezer. On seeing no ice, he looked around for some frozen packet of vegetables as a substitute. Suddenly, he felt Yibo wrap his arms around Zhan’s waist and rest his chin in the curve of Zhan’s neck. His entire body was plastered against Zhan’s.

”I love you, Zhan ge,” Yibo sighed and planted kisses on Zhan’s shoulder, moving along his neck all the way up to his jaw.

Zhan moaned lightly and smiled as Yibo wrapped his lips around every inch of Zhan’s skin, leaving a trail of wet spots and goosebumps. 

”I love you so much,” Yibo whispered in Zhan’s ear before planting more kisses behind the ear and down the back of Zhan’s neck.

”Bo-di,” Zhan murmured as he tilted his head, giving Yibo more access. “I’ve waited so long...for this. 

Yibo turned Zhan around by the waist and pushed him against the fridge gently, placing one hand on the door, the other wrapped around Zhan’s tiny waist. He looked deep into Zhan’s eyes and they stayed like that for several seconds. Eventually Zhan’s gaze moved to the cut on Yibo’s lip and he touched it with his thumb. When Yibo flinched a little, Zhan leaned closer and placed a soft kiss on the bruise.

”It feels better already…,” Yibo smiled.

”Oh, that’s good. Guess I can stop then,” Zhan smirked and pulled back.

”Zhan-ge! No...it still hurts.” Yibo whined.

Zhan chuckled and pushed Yibo. As he looked away, his eyes fell on the oven clock and he jerked up straight.

”What happened?” Yibo asked, alarmed.

”Bo-di! I have a shoot in an hour! I need to get ready and run!” Zhan dashed out of the kitchen towards his bedroom before Yibo could respond. Yibo trailed after him and sat on his bed, waiting for Zhan to finish showering. 

When Zhan emerged from the bathroom and darted towards the closet, Yibo couldn't help but stare at his half naked body with just a towel wrapped around his waist. His skin was wet and glistening, with some water droplets still left on it, that were now sliding down Zhan’s back seductively.

_Fuck! He’s so beautiful and sexy._

Zhan quickly tugged on a sweater top and yanked on a pair of jeans. When he turned around, he bumped into Yibo.

”Yibo!” Zhan whined. “I’m sorry but…”

Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and pulled him closer. He rested his forehead on Zhan’s and their noses touched as he whispered.

”Two more minutes, ge.”

Zhan paused his frenzied activities and took a deep breath. He placed his hands at the back of Yibo’s head and ran his fingers through his hair. Slowly, he placed a kiss at the corner of Yibo’s lips.

When Yibo smiled, Zhan placed more kisses along his lips, caressing Yibo’s plush lips between his. When he was satisfied, he joined their lips and kissed Yibo until they were breathless once more. He kept going until all he could taste was Yibo and all he could feel was Yibo’s body heat.

Yibo moaned when Zhan ran his tongue over the cut on his lip. Zhan lapped it with his tongue, caressing it, teasing it, playing with it. He nibbled the upper lip and licked it until Yibo let out a long moan. After several minutes, they pulled back and Zhan was satisfied seeing the wet slick on Yibo’s lip and the dazed look on his face.

”I’m sorry I have to go, didi,” Zhan placed a kiss on Yibo’s nose.

”Hmm,” Yibo hid his face in the crook of Zhan’s neck. “I’m sorry I didn't react properly earlier and we wasted half the night.”

Zhan pulled Yibo closer and they swayed to an unknown silent melody that only they could hear.

”I love you, Bo-di. You've made me so damn happy.”


	45. Nothing will ever be the same

* * *

Yibo watched as Zhan got his things together and dumped them in a bag. Unknowingly, he had begun following him around. Finally, when Zhan was done, he sighed and looked at Yibo.

”Ready to leave?” Yibo asked as Zhan placed his bag on his shoulder.

”Hmm…,” Zhan nodded and held his hand, making their way to the door. 

They stood at the door and stared at each other, neither willing to open it.

”So,” Zhan began, “I have rehearsals and ad shoots the next three days and then I’m off to the next location for Jade Dynasty.”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded as he massaged the back of Zhan’s hand with his thumb. “I’m going to be in town for this week and then I will be in Bulgaria for a TTXS episode.”

”Oh, wow!” Zhan smiled. “That’s exciting.”

”Yeah, it’s okay…”

”Aren’t you excited?”

”I...I wish,” Yibo looked at his feet, “that we could spend more time together...I mean we just...only now did we confess...and we’re going to be separated for god knows how long…”

”Yibo,” Zhan placed a hand on Yibo’s cheek, “look at me.”

Yibo raised his head up and leaned into Zhan’s touch.

”It’s almost the end of October. We have a busy November but then we’ll both be in town in December. I have my X-Nine concert and you will have your New Year thing with the TTXS brothers.”

”That’s more than a month!”

”Bo-di,” Zhan leaned closer and whispered. “This isn’t going to be easy. Our crazy schedules are just one of many things that will make this so damn hard. You understand that, right?”

Yibo felt his eyes burn as he nodded.

”I...know that,” he tilted his face to plant a kiss on Zhan's palm. “But I love you, Zhan-ge. I’ve loved you for a long time. I didn't think it was ever possible that you would return my love. But now...now that you have...I’m never letting go.”

”No matter how hard it gets?”

”Never. No matter what.”

”Good,” Zhan let out a long exhale and hugged Yibo and placed a kiss on his shoulder and neck. “Because I can't imagine my life without you.”

With one final long kiss, Zhan sighed and finally opened the door.

”I have to go now…”

”I’ll miss you,” Yibo pouted.

”I’ll miss you too,” Zhan chuckled and placed a kiss on Yibo’s nose.

* * *

On his bike ride home, Yibo couldn't help but smile the whole way. Everything felt different. The day had just begun and with every passing minute, the new reality of his life sunk in. The fresh early morning breeze was nothing compared to the lightness and freshness he felt inside.

_If someone had told me before yesterday that Zhan-ge would confess his love to me and that we would one day be together, I would have thought they were batshit crazy._

Yibo laughed and shook his head at himself.

_But now...now...nothing will ever be the same. Xiao Zhan has changed my life. I’m beginning a new chapter...no, a whole new book with him. I’m never going to let him go. Ever. No matter how many obstacles we have to face. Work schedules. Distance. Career challenges. Family and friends. Society. Nothing matters. As long as Zhan-ge is by my side._

* * *

__

Zhan gazed out the window during the car ride to the shoot. A smile was plastered on his face and only grew wider with every passing second as his mind replayed the events of the morning over and over. 

__

_If someone had told me that one day I would fall in love with a boy who is six years younger than me and he would return my love back and we would be together, I would have called a shrink for them. But, Yibo loves me. And I love him._

__

Zhan shook his head and laughed softly.

__

_Everything feels so different and new and somehow still familiar and comfortable. I don't know what lies ahead of us but I am going to do everything I can to make Yibo as happy as he makes me and we’re going to be together no matter what._

__

A ping snapped Zhan out of his thoughts and he saw a message from Yibo.

__

> __
> 
> _Bo-di: Just reached home. What about you?  
>    
>  Zhan: Still on my way...  
>    
>  Bo-di: Oh, that sucks!  
>    
>  Zhan: Not as much as being away from you right now 😔 _
> 
> __

_  
_

Yibo smiled with a blush and lay back on his bed. His heart felt so warm and full that he felt like it would burst open any minute. With a longing sigh, he typed a reply.

__

> _Yibo: I hate it too...  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: We can...meet once more at least...before I leave?  
>    
>  Yibo: I am free day after night. Will that work?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I think so!  
>    
>  Yibo: It’s a date! _

__

Zhan smiled giddily when he saw the message.

__

_Date._

__

He clutched the phone to his lips to prevent himself from squealing with delight.

__

> __
> 
> _Zhan: Yes, it is 😘  
>    
>  Bo-di: The real one is better 😏  
>    
>  Zhan: Wang Yibo! 🙈 🙊  
>    
>  Bo-di: I could kiss Zhan-ge’s lips all day. They’re so soft and tasty!  
>    
>  Zhan: Bo-di! Shut up!  
>    
>  Zhan: Okay, just reached. Gtg!  
>    
>  Bo-di: I love you, ge!  
>    
>  Zhan: I love you too, Bo-di. So so much. _
> 
> __

_  
_

Yibo let out a long sigh and spread himself like a starfish on his bed, happy and satisfied. 

__

_If I thought I couldn't love him anymore...I was so dead wrong._

__

”I love Xiao Zhan!!!” Yibo yelled out to his empty apartment. “And he loves me!!!” 

* * *

__

> __
> 
> _Zhan-ge: Just done with the shoot. Headed to rehearsals now. What’re you upto?  
>    
>  Yibo: At TTXS shooting now. Your X-Nine rehearsal?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yep. It’s going to be three long days of rehearsal because then I’ll be gone for four weeks for Jade Dynasty! 😓  
>    
>  Yibo: I wish I could help, ge.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Me too. But I’ll have others there to help me.  
>    
>  Yibo: Don’t let anyone get too close, okay? No manhandling! 😠  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: 😂😂😂  
>    
>  Yibo: I’m serious, ge! Do you have any idea how jealous I was that day!?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Oh my god… 😮  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It all makes sense now…  
>    
>  Yibo: No shit 🙄  
>    
>  Yibo: Don't forget you have a boyfriend now 🤨  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: That sounds nice  
>    
>  Yibo: What?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Boyfriend…  
>    
>  Yibo: Feels good to say too...  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Fuck, I miss you  
>    
>  Yibo: I miss you too 🥰  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Okay didi, I have to go now. Time for some rehearsals! 🕺 🤦🙇  
>    
>  Yibo: You can do it, ge! And tell all your bandmates...hands off!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Love you didi ❤️ _
> 
> __

__  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More of a filler chapter, more meat to come soon.


	46. I've never done this

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Bo-di...I’m sorry but looks like I’ll be here till late today as well!  
>    
>  Yibo: It’s been two days since I saw you, ge…_🙁 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: I know...but you know how long it takes me to learn choreography  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I promise I’ll stop by tomorrow before I leave for Jade Dynasty _

Yibo frowned at his phone. It had been two days since they last met and confessed. All he wanted to do was spend as much time with Zhan as possible before he left for his location shoot for four weeks. 

_Be patient, Yibo. Zhan-ge told you this would be hard. Our jobs are hectic and this is going to happen. Be patient._

> _Zhan-ge: I’m really sorry_ 😞 _  
>   
>  Yibo: It’s okay, ge. I understand. I’ll see you tomorrow.  
>    
>  Yibo: But please let’s make sure we meet even if for just a few minutes, okay?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I promise. I want to see you too. _

Zhan put his phone aside and sighed. 

_This is not how it should be._ He thought grumpily. _We’re literally in the same city and we can't meet._

”Come on, lazy bum!” Chu Yue called out and snapped Zhan out of his thoughts. “We’ve got a long night ahead of us.”

After five more hours, Zhan sat down on his knees, panting. He glanced at the clock.

_2:30._

_Yibo will be fast asleep by now._

”Want a ride home?” Chu Yue stood in front of Zhan, offering him his hand to stand up.

Zhan took the hand and stood up with a groan.

”Yeah that would be…,” Zhan paused as another thought crossed his mind. “Actually...no, I think I’ll call a cab. “

”Are you sure?” Chu Yue gave him a quizzical look.

”Yeah, it’s out of the way for you anyway,” Zhan shrugged and grabbed his things. “See you tomorrow!”

* * *

Zhan got out of the elevator and walked hastily to Yibo’s apartment. 

_Should I just go home? This is too impulsive. He must be so tired and asleep. I shouldn’t disturb him. No. I want to see him. We’re going to be apart for a whole month soon._

He bit his lip as he raised a fist to knock on the door. He knocked once, twice, thrice, but there was still no response.

”So much for being spontaneous,” he chuckled and shook his head.

As he began walking back, he stopped and pulled out his phone. Before he knew what he was doing, he dialed Yibo’s number and stood in front of the door again.

”Hello…,” a sleepy deep voice answered his call.

”Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed.

”Gege?” The voice sounded confused and raspy.

Zhan’s heart flipped hearing him and he began knocking on the door once more.

”It’s me! Open the door, Bo-di. I’m here!”

”Huh?! “ The voice startled and Zhan heard a thud sound.

”Yibo? Are you okay?”

”Uhh..I...sorry, I just fell off the...wait...are you outside...is that you knocking?”

”Yes, you idiot. Are you going to let me in or should I leave?”

”No..no, Zhan-ge!” Yibo exclaimed loud enough for Zhan to hear him through the door. “I’m..coming…don’t go anywhere...one sec…”

Zhan smiled as he ended the call and waited with bated breath. The two days had felt like two months. He fidgeted with the hem of his shirt as he heard Yibo fumble with the locks.

A few seconds later, the door flew open and a wide eyed dishevelled Yibo stood in the doorway, blinking at Zhan confused and disoriented.

”Hi…,” Zhan smiled as he took a step closer.

”Hey…,” Yibo grinned as he scratched his head.

Zhan closed the gap and wrapped his arms around Yibo, taking in a long deep breath. He walked them inside backwards, not letting go of Yibo. He closed the door with his foot and tightened his hold around Yibo.

Yibo chuckled and pulled Zhan closer by the waist and just held him for several minutes. Eventually, he pulled back and placed a kiss on Zhan’s cheek. When Zhan pulled back and faced him, Yibo brushed aside some hair from his eyes and grinned some more.

"You came," Yibo beamed.

"I came," Zhan smiled back.

”You’re sweaty,” Yibo smirked.

”Oh!” Zhan jumped back as the realization hit him. “I’m sorry! I didn't even think of that...I just wanted to see you…so I came straight from rehearsal...”

”I don't care…,” Yibo pulled Zhan back towards him by the shirt. “I’m glad you came!”

Zhan’s embarrassment vanished and he placed his hands behind Yibo’s neck and pulled him in for a kiss. When their lips met, they both sighed simultaneously as if drinking water after days of thirst. Their tongues found each other quickly and Yibo pushed Zhan back against the door.

Zhan moaned every time Yibo grabbed at his face, his neck, his hair, his waist, his hips, his back. Yibo groaned into Zhan’s mouth when Zhan attacked his lips with his teeth, never separating even when he moved Yibo’s face around, entering him from all angles as if trying to taste him inside out. 

As their kiss deepened, Zhan moved his hands down and intertwined his fingers with Yibo’s. Yibo dragged their hands up and placed them against the door above Zhan’s head. Zhan tightened his grip and drew their hands higher in an attempt to pull Yibo’s body closer. Yibo obliged and soon their bodies were plastered against each other as they kissed.

Unsatisfied, Zhan impatiently tugged free from Yibo and placed his hands on Yibo’s lower back. Slowly, his hands slid down to Yibo’s ass and he pulled Yibo even closer. Craving more, Zhan spread his leg to one side and pulled Yibo in between him, undulating his hips against Yibo’s.

With a slight whimper, Yibo pulled back and looked at Zhan in astonishment.

”What happened?” Zhan whispered hungrily as he kept their bodies together, not letting Yibo pull out of his arms. 

”Uhh...nothing...I…,” Yibo fumbled for words.

It didn't help that Zhan’s tongue was making its way down from Yibo’s lips, under his jawline, and down his neck, placing wet kisses and nibbles along the way.

”You what?” Zhan pulled a shivering Yibo closer, grinding against him lightly.

Yibo felt their hardness rub against each other and let out another whimper.

”Ge...I...I’ve never…

”Never what, didi?” Zhan muttered soothingly, caressing Yibo’s back as he placed more kisses along Yibo’s shoulders.

”Never done...this,” Yibo spoke slowly as his breath hitched with each kiss.

Zhan pulled back and looked at Yibo, whose eyes were dark, heavy, and nervous.

”I’ve...never done this with a man either, Yibo…,” Zhan gave him a small smile and massaged the back of his neck gently. “You’re the first guy I’ve…”

”No, I mean...I’ve _never_ done this….,” Yibo looked away.

”Oh…,” Zhan loosened his hold on Yibo. “You mean you’ve never...done anything with...anyone?”

”No...I’ve kissed before...one girl...but nothing more…,” Yibo bit his lip nervously.

There was silence for a few seconds. Then, Zhan smiled as Yibo’s eyes stared at the door behind him. He placed his hands on Yibo’s face and turned it towards him. He placed chaste kisses on his lips, cheeks, nose, eyes and then on his lips again.

”That’s alright...we can...umm...slow down…”

”No...okay...I mean...I don't...it’s not like I don’t..."

Zhan giggled and straightened his legs, watching Yibo stutter.

”Shh,” Zhan placed a finger on Yibo’s lips. “Calm down. It’s not like I have much experience with a guy...everything is new for me too…”

”But you’ve...been with a girl?” Yibo’s eyes narrowed down on Zhan’s.

”I’m 27, Yibo! What do you expect? I’ve had two girlfriends...but I’ve only had...sex...with one of them."

”Oh…,” Yibo pursed his lips and remained silent.

”How have you never...I mean have you looked at you...how could anyone resist all of this,” Zhan gestured at Yibo’s body.

”It’s just...when I was younger, there were several rules as an idol trainee. And then after our group disbanded, I never had enough time for dating. And honestly...I never found anyone that...I wanted to be with…”

”So who was the one lucky girl?” Zhan smirked as he played with Yibo’s hair.

”She was a friend’s friend who I met at a party. We danced together and hit it off and went on a few dates.”

”Then why did you break up?”

”I...realized my feelings weren’t as strong when we kissed. And I was too busy to waste any time on anything less.

”Oh…,” Zhan rubbed Yibo’s back. 

”Why did you break up with them…?”

”Well,” Zhan let out a long exhale, “the first time we were both just so young. It was more like a crush...puppy love. Then she moved and that was that. The second one was a proper relationship in college but when I decided to change careers, she wasn’t that supportive and I realized I didn't love her enough to not pursue this dream.”

”Hmm…,” Yibo stared at Zhan with an expression Zhan couldn't decipher.

”So…,” Yibo spoke finally, “was it...how did it feel...”

”There’s no comparison,” Zhan smiled and pulled Yibo in for another kiss. “Something about this...us...feels right...and I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”

Yibo smiled into the kiss on hearing Zhan’s words and let himself be pulled into another deep kiss. Within seconds, their bodies were entangled once again but this time, Zhan fought his urge to grind down hard against Yibo’s body.

_I don't want to rush him. I want to do this right. Sometimes I forget he is just twenty one. He’s been working since he was a child. I’m going to make him feel good. And slowly, we’ll both get there...together._

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo’s voice broke Zhan’s train of thoughts.

”You don’t need to take it this slow…,” Yibo grinned.

Before Zhan could reply, Yibo spread Zhan’s legs and pushed his body against Zhan’s. With one swift wave, Yibo rolled against Zhan’s hip. 


	47. You don't ever have to hide from me again

* * *

Zhan moaned and inhaled sharply. They were both hard. Very hard. His hands immediately grabbed Yibo’s ass again and he pulled him closer as his own body thrust against him. They moved together, not taking their eyes off one another. With every grind, Yibo groaned and gasped. Zhan watched as Yibo slowly melted into a puddle of pleasure as Zhan kept rubbing them together. 

When Yibo threw his head back after one particularly forceful thrust, Zhan reached forward and bit down on his neck. Swiftly, he turned them and switched their positions, slamming Yibo against the door and using it as support to press against him over and over again, his hips undulating, his mouth crushing down on Yibo’s.

”That feels...so good...ge…,” Yibo muttered in between kisses. 

Zhan moved his lips down Yibo’s neck once more and pulled his collar aside.

”Do you have a…,” Zhan let out a low growl.

”No…,” Yibo swallowed, panting. “No photoshoot for another week.”

Zhan smiled against the skin before biting down on it. He lapped his tongue over it and bit it again, this time sucking it as if thirsty for Yibo’s blood. Yibo’s hands clutched the back of Zhan’s shirt as he sucked harder.

When Zhan pulled back, the skin had bruised and was red enough to satisfy Zhan. He cupped Yibo’s ass, grinding down on him harder as he licked his way back up to Yibo’s lips.

”Ge…,” Yibo trembled. “I...it’s too hard…”

”Me too…,” Zhan breathed against Yibo’s lips.

Zhan’s hands massaged his hardness. Yibo flinched at the sensation and his breathing became heavier. Zhan never moved more than an inch from his face as his eyes watched Yibo’s every reaction while his hand stroked him over his pants. He moved his fingers up and carefully, slid them over the waistband of Yibo’s boxers. He paused and looked at Yibo, waiting.

Yibo licked his lips as his breath caught at the cold sensation of Zhan’s fingers grazing his skin. He nodded slowly and then closed his eyes, letting his head fall back as Zhan’s hand made its way down, eventually finding his dick.

”Bo-di,” Zhan whispered. “I love you…”

Yibo opened his eyes and felt his entire body relax at the words. He let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding. 

”I love you too, ge…,” he whispered back as Zhan’s hand wrapped itself around him and began stroking him.

The sensation shot through his body like a bullet. With every movement, his body grew warmer and he felt an overwhelming need to feel Zhan. Before he knew it, his hand found its way down Zhan’s pants and he fumbled for a few seconds to get the right grip on Zhan’s dick.

”Wait,” Zhan muttered breathlessly as he loosened his pants and adjusted Yibo’s hand on him. “That’s better…”

Yibo nearly choked when he felt how hard Zhan was.

_He’s bigger than I thought. And he’s so hard. Because of me?! I can't believe Zhan-ge is this turned on because of me. And I can't believe I am being touched by Xiao Zhan._

Within seconds, though, his thoughts were broken when he felt Zhan moan against his lips.

”Bo-di….that feels so...your hands are so big...don’t stop…”

Zhan pulled away from the half kiss and rested his forehead against the door, beside Yibo’s ear as they increased their pace. Yibo had never felt more exhilarated in his life. Every time he stroked Zhan, he could feel him shiver. Everytime he tightened his grip and twisted his hand while tugging on him, he felt Zhan’s helpless moans tickle his ear.

Zhan’s hands held onto Yibo’s dick as if his life depended on it. He stroked him harder and faster and soon, they were in sync and found the perfect rhythm. Zhan shut his eyes tight as he felt Yibo’s big hand jerking him off and managed to peck Yibo’s ear and neck every now and then, encouraging him.

”Fuck, Yibo...this feels so good...don’t stop...ahh...that’s the...yeah...keep doing that...ugghhh,” Zhan moaned into Yibo’s neck as they increased their pace maddeningly.

Their bodies were crushed together and their breaths were heavy and wet as they went on and on for several more seconds.

”Ge...I…,I...” Yibo groaned loudly.

”Hmm...me too...,” Zhan moved his head and came face to face with Yibo.

He caught Yibo’s lips in his and kissed him senseless, the desperate sensation finally pushing them over the edge. With a loud gasp, they both came into each other’s hands and then their bodies went limp.

They stayed still as the pleasure filled their bodies and made them shudder all over. They gently stroked each other through it and when the feeling gradually subsided, Zhan pulled back and let out a long sigh.

”That was…,” Zhan grinned and placed a kiss on Yibo’s lips.

”Yeah…,” Yibo was still breathless as he leaned his head back against the door.

”I’m glad I came,” Zhan chuckled.

”I’m glad you _came_ too,” Yibo smirked prompting Zhan to slap his arm and finally pull his other hand out of Yibo’s pants.

”We need to clean up,” Zhan shook his head and walked towards the bathroom.

* * *

Once they were cleaned up, Zhan sat at Yibo’s window, with Yibo standing between his legs, resting against him.

”I have to be at rehearsal in four hours,” Zhan sighed as he kissed Yibo’s head occasionally. 

”Do you want to...you can stay over tonight. Isn't the rehearsal studio closer from here than from your apartment?”

”I guess so,” Zhan pursed his lips and nodded. “But I don't have any clothes for tomorrow.

”We can wash yours here...or you can borrow mine,” Yibo straightened up and shrugged. 

”I don't think I’ll be able to focus on work if I can smell you all around me all day,” Zhan bit his lip with a grin, running his hand through Yibo’s hair.

”Is that such a bad thing?” Yibo murmured as he closed his eyes, enjoying the relaxing massage. 

”Maybe not…,” Zhan whispered as he enveloped Yibo’s lips with his, eating up all his sighs and moans.

”Come on,” Yibo let out an exhale and caught hold of Zhan’s hand. “You need rest.”

Zhan pouted as Yibo pulled away from him and dragged him to the bed. Yibo chuckled at his expression as he tucked them in and got comfortable under the sheets.

”Ge?” Yibo spoke softly.

”Hmm?” Zhan replied as he adjusted Yibo’s body so he could wrap himself around him just the way he liked it.

”Do you remember when we first cuddled in bed?” Yibo smiled as Zhan pulled him closer.

”Yeah...at my place when you came back from Canada….I was so embarrassed. I thought you were my pillow!”

”No...it was before that…,” Yibo smirked and tilted his head up to look at a confused Zhan.

”Huh, really?”

”It was after the Untamed wrap up party and you were drunk. You pulled me next to you and threw your arm and leg around me,” Yibo chuckled.

”Oh, what?! Really? I don't remember that!”

”That’s because I moved back to my bed in the morning...because I didn't want you to feel uncomfortable when you woke up…,” Yibo’s voice grew heavy at the memory.

Zhan felt a sadness spread through his body as he imagined Yibo holding back. He remembered how he had felt so many times during that summer. Wanting to do so much but having to reign all the emotions in.

”I didn't know…,” Zhan whispered and gazed down at Yibo, whose smile had morphed into a lost look.

Zhan pressed Yibo tightly against him and placed a kiss on his ear before speaking again.

”You don't have to hold back any more, didi,” Zhan swayed their bodies lightly. “You don't ever have to hide from me again. Ever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First time writing M/M smut. Forgive me if it's not satisfying!! Any comments are appreciated, I guess :P


	48. It matters to me

* * *

”Zhan-Zhan? Are you okay?” Peng Chu Yue raised an eyebrow as a very flushed Zhan entered the studio. 

Zhan cleared his throat as he dropped his bag down.

”Uhh...yeah...why?” Zhan tried speaking as casually as possible.

”Well, for one, you look extremely flustered. And second, your hair is all...messed up.”

Zhan suppressed a smirk as his mind went back to a few minutes back when Yibo dropped him off on his bike. As Zhan tugged his helmet off, he was caught off guard as Yibo looked around hastily and then pulled Zhan forward by his shirt and placed a harsh and hurried kiss on Zhan’s unsuspecting lips.

It had lasted all of three seconds, but Zhan’s lips were ravished and his mind was still dizzy from the kiss when he entered the studio. Zhan sneaked a quick glance at the mirrored wall and his eyes widened as he noticed how dishevelled he looked. He tried smoothening his hair and licked his lips in an attempt to soothe their redness.

”Okay, what’s up?” Chu Yue frowned at him. “You’ve not even replied to me.”

”Nothing!” Zhan stuttered. “I barely got any sleep and rushed here because I woke up late…” Zhan suppressed another smirk.

Zhan tried his best but couldn't help but think back to when he woke up an hour back. His body was entangled with Yibo’s, who was fast asleep. He had tried to be careful when slipping out of bed but Yibo had woken up. He caught hold of Zhan’s hand and yanked him back down with a half grin.

”Don’t go, gege,” Yibo whined as he wrapped his arms around Zhan once more.

”Let me go, Yibo!” Zhan giggled. “I’m going to be late.”

”I’ll drop you on my bike,” Yibo muttered, tightening his hold on Zhan.

Something about the image of Yibo in his bike gear speeding down the road with Zhan pressed against his back, did strange things to Zhan’s body. And Yibo felt it.

”You like that, huh?” Yibo smirked as he rolled his body ever so lightly against Zhan’s.

As Zhan let out the softest moan, Yibo climbed on top of Zhan and stared at him, licking his lips.

”How much time do you have?” Yibo lowered himself, positioning his hip against Zhan’s.

”Ahh...Yibo,” Zhan shut his eyes and groaned. “Like...five minutes…,” Zhan rolled his body up to meet Yibo’s.

”Looks like that should be enough,” Yibo breathed heavy as his hands slipped down Zhan’s pants.

”Looks like it,” Zhan grabbed Yibo’s dick and grinned widely.

* * *

> _Bo-di: Miss you, ge! Where are you now?  
>    
>  Zhan: Just got home. My flight’s in a few hours. Miss you too, didi.  
>    
>  Bo-di: I wish I could meet you...still at TTXS shooting 😓  
>    
>  Zhan: It’s okay, Bo-di.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Are you alright? You sound...low.  
>    
>  Zhan: Just tired…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Zhan-ge…  
>    
>  Zhan: The management cut my solo segment in the concert.  
>    
>  Bo-di: What? Why!?  
>    
>  Zhan: Just another attempt to push me down.  
>    
>  Bo-di: I don’t get it. Why would they do that? Why are they causing so much trouble for you!  
>    
>  Zhan: It doesn’t really matter why.  
>    
>  Bo-di: If it’s hurting you, it matters to me.  
>    
>  Zhan: They just have a...slight bias to some of the other boys. But it’s nobody’s fault. It’s just the management…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Why are they more biased towards them and not you? _

Zhan hesitated and bit his fingernail. He wasn't sure how to explain it to his young boyfriend. He wanted to protect him at all cost and wanted to avoid discussing such a disturbing issue. But before he could figure out a way to avoid the topic, his phone lit up with an incoming video call.

”Bo-di?” Zhan smiled and lay down on his couch.

”Why are they more biased towards them, ge?”

”Typical, Yibo,” Zhan shook his head and sighed.

Silence reigned as Yibo waited for Zhan to reply, levelling an intense stare on him the whole time.

”Fine! God! The management placed additional...clauses and stuff...and some of us agreed to them and some of us, like me and Chu Yue didn't. But that’s okay, I’m not judging the other boys.”

”What kind of clauses?” Yibo cocked his head as he sat down on his chair.

”More commission demands, more control over your personal life...,”

”And?”

”You know, just that kind of stuff.”

”Ge…,” Yibo’s eyes softened. “You can share anything with me. I know you’re not telling me the entire truth. But if you don't feel comfortable, I understand and I won't ask again.”

Zhan’s eyes welled up at his words and he tilted his head back and took in a deep breath.

”Some people...in the upper management...made,” Zhan’s voice quivered, “sexual advances…”

Yibo’s entire face hardened. He gritted his teeth and his hand clenched his phone. He watched as Zhan looked at a point behind the screen, looking lost and sad as he probably relived the memory. It broke Yibo’s heart.

”And when some of us refused,” Zhan continued finally, “they stopped promoting us as much as the others. You can see it in the work...some of the boys are being put up for lead roles while some of us aren’t even being sent to those auditions.”

Both remained silent after that. When Zhan finally looked at Yibo, he could see tears in his eyes.

”I’m sorry, Zhan-ge. I’m sorry you have to go through this. I wish I knew what to do…”

”You’ve done more than you know, Bo-di,” Zhan’s face crinkled into a smile and he wiped his welling tears. “I’ll get through this.”

”You will. And I’ll be right by your side.”

”I love you,” Zhan kissed his fingers and placed it on the phone’s camera.

”I love you more,” Yibo pretended to receive the kiss and place it on his own lips.

”Not possible,” Zhan smiled as he ran a finger on the screen, caressing Yibo’s face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please keep in mind, this is fiction. No hate on any of the real characters, I love the entire band! That's why I'm not taking names. This plot is completely made up but I just wanted to touch on the issue of sexual harassment that exists in any professional industry.


	49. Can you do that for me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 6000 views. Six fucking thousand. What!? I'm on a writing spree thanks to all the kudos and comments. Wow.

* * *

One week passed by pretty quickly. Between work and their constant texts and video calls, it wasn't as bad as Yibo had thought it would be. It didn't make it any easier though. Every night his heart ached to have Zhan in his arms. Every morning, his mind wished he could wake up to Zhan’s smiling face.

> _Yibo: Goodmorning, ge!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Goodmorning, didi. Slept well?  
>    
>  Yibo: Not as well as when you’re here _😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: So cheesy, Yibo _😋 😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Don't you leave for Bulgaria today? So exciting!!  
>    
>  Yibo: Yup! With Han-ge. The rest of the team already got there yesterday.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Take loads of photos and share it with me, okay? I’ve never been to Europe _😩 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Maybe...we could go together some time…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: That sounds perfect, Yibo.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: There’s so much I want to do with you.  
>    
>  Yibo: Oh, yeah? Like what? _😏 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Looks like someone is too excited this morning.  
>    
>  Yibo: Always...who wouldn't? When their boyfriend is Xiao Zhan… _

Zhan let out a gasp and he looked around him hastily. The entire crew was busy setting up the shots for the day. In the blink of an eye, Zhan went further away and sat on a rock, with a smirk on his face and a shiver running down his spine.

> _Zhan-ge: Do you have any idea what your boyfriend wants to do to you right now?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: What he wants to do to that damn body right this minute? _

Yibo’s breath hitched and his hand, that was lazily stroking his dick, froze.

”Oh shit,” Yibo muttered under his breath.

Before he could reply, an incoming video call startled Yibo.

”Yibo…,” Zhan grinned as he whispered into the phone. “I want to watch.”

”Wha...what?” Yibo’s breaths became shallow. “Watch what?”

”You,” Zhan’s voice became deep. “Touching yourself.”

”Fuck,” Yibo stuttered.

”Can you do that for me, didi?” Zhan’s stretched out the last word in a sweet honey voice, batting his eyelids at a flustered Yibo.

”Ye...yes, ge.”

”Good boy,” Zhan licked his lip and smirked. “I wish I was there to...help you.”

”What...would you do...if you were here,” Yibo let out a long exhale, slowly getting comfortable with the new situation.

”I would kiss those soft plush lips until they bled, Bo-di. Do you have any idea how crazy your lips make me?

Yibo sighed as he closed his eyes and slowly stroked his dick again.

”Angle the camera down, Bo-di...I want to see what your hand is doing...along with that pretty face…”

Yibo did as he was told and gulped as Zhan continued talking.

”Beautiful,” Zhan whispered. “I want to wrap my hands around you...you like my soft delicate hands, don't you, didi?”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded as his hand began moving faster.

”I see that the hickey I gave you is fading,” Zhan pouted and clucked his tongue. “I need to leave more marks on that gorgeous body. So that everyone knows who you belong to…”

”Fuck...I want that too, gege…”

”You have no idea how hard I am right now, Wang Yibo,” Zhan growled. “I need your big hands on me, while I bite down on your long neck. I would grab you harder, didi...faster...rougher…”

Yibo’s hand automatically tightened around his dick involuntarily and he began doing what Zhan was describing.

”You look...delicious. I wonder what you would taste like…,” Zhan smirked as he licked his lower lip. 

”Wha...what?! Fuck...Zhan-ge,” Yibo’s eyes jerked open and his hand fumbled.

”Don’t stop, Bo-di...I want to watch you touch yourself...more...keep going...don’t disappoint your gege…”

Yibo stroked himself with renewed vigor, not taking his eyes off Zhan.

”Fuck...you’re so hot, Bo-di,” Zhan’s face grew dark. “Next time I’m there, I want you to come on my face...would you do that for me…”

”Anything for you, gege,” Yibo nodded desperately as his hand became frantic.

”Mmmm….,” Zhan moaned, “I miss your big...hard...thick...dic…”

Before Zhan could finish his sentence, Yibo let out a loud groan and Zhan watched as he came in spurts into his hand, his entire body going limp.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo panted. “Fuck…”

”Patience, Yibo...patience...we will get to that too…,” Zhan’s smirk returned.

Yibo’s eyes widened once more and he felt his entire face heat up.

”Zhan-ge! I...I didn't...I...mean…”

”I have to go now, Yibo...duty calls…,” Zhan blew a flying kiss to the camera as he stood up. “I love you.”

With a wink, Zhan ended the call and returned to the set, hard but so very satisfied.

”Fuck,” Yibo repeated again and again as a grin slowly spread across his face. “Zhan-ge’s going to be the death of me.”

* * *

> _Zhan: I have some good news!  
>    
>  Zhan: Wait, you must already be in flight! Fuck it, I can’t wait to tell you this.  
>    
>  Zhan: Looks like my solo is back on! I topped the online poll as the most popular member of X-Nine.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Still boarding.  
>    
>  Bo-di: That’s amazing! Mark my words, ge. Once the Untamed is out, everyone is going to know who Xiao Zhan is.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Just wait and watch. No one will be able to keep you down then.  
>    
>  Zhan: We’re both going to fly high, didi. Together.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Always together_ 🥰 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Always _❤️ 


	50. Don't let them go

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Goodmorning, didi! Wow, those pics! Bulgaria is beautiful.  
>    
>  Yibo: This is just the house we’re all staying at.  
>    
>  Yibo: Tomorrow, we’ll be visiting the market place. Han-ge will be cooking!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: When we meet next, I’ll cook for you.  
>    
>  Yibo: 🥰  
>    
>  Yibo: Alright, ge. It’s really late at night here and I’m exhausted.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Take rest, Bo-di. Goodnight! Sweet dreams.  
>    
>  Yibo: I always have sweet dreams of you, ge.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: God! So cheesy, didi 🙈  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Love you! _

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Wow!!! That architecture!  
>    
>  Yibo: I knew you would like it! This city is so full of history and art. You would love it here, Zhan-ge.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I wish I was there ☹️  
>    
>  Yibo: We’ll visit together, soon!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Hopefully...for now, I'm still here. Just got home. What are you upto?  
>    
>  Yibo: Wow, it’s almost midnight there, ge! Just hanging out at the house. Feng-ge keeps teasing me because I’m on the phone so much 😅  
>    
>  Yibo: We will be hosting guests tonight and Han-ge is cooking the entire meal!  
>    
>  Yibo: And I was teaching one of the girls here some dance moves. It’s so boring otherwise to be indoors 😖  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Oh...who’s this girl?  
>    
>  Yibo: Just one of the other guests who are on this trip with us...meeting them all for the first time.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Hmm...I’m going to go take a quick shower  
>    
>  Yibo: Okay, I think the guests are here...I’ll message you later 😘 _

* * *

> _Yibo: I miss you, ge! Send me a selfie before sleeping. I want to see your face.  
>    
>  Yibo: There’s so many people here...I feel awkward and overwhelmed 😳  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m too exhausted...I look like shit  
>    
>  Yibo: Zhan-ge never looks bad...my boyfriend is the most handsome human in the whole wide world.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Thanks, Bo-di. I think I’m going to sleep now. It’s late.  
>    
>  Yibo: Zhan-ge...why do I feel like something is bothering you?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It’s nothing, Bo-di...have fun...goodnight _

Zhan sighed as he put his phone aside. He smacked his pillow onto his face and groaned.

”What is it with me and Yibo interacting with girls!? Why do I get so jealous!?”

Just then, Zhan’s phone rang loudly. Zhan grabbed it quickly and on seeing Yibo’s name light up the screen, smiled and relaxed a little.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo spoke almost as soon as Zhan accepted the video call.

”Hi, Bo-di…,” Zhan turned onto his stomach, resting the phone against the headboard. “Are you done with dinner already?”

”No, it’s still going on. I just made an excuse and got away for a bit.”

”Why, what happened?”

”You tell me…,” Yibo sat down on his own bed.

”Oh…,” Zhan bit his lip, “it’s nothing...I feel silly…”

”Tell me.”

”I just…,” Zhan cleared his throat, embarrassed, “I get jealous…”

”Of?”

”Whenever you have...I don't know how to explain it, didi...let it be!”

”When I have? Tell me ge...I want to know what’s bothering you.”

”I don't know why but I get jealous when you interact with girls...when you dance with them…”

Yibo was speechless. He stared at Zhan’s uncomfortable face and was at a loss for words. Slowly, a slight grin spread across his face and he began chuckling.

”Stop laughing at me!” Zhan exclaimed. “I told you it’s silly.”

”It’s not...it’s...cute,” Yibo leaned back and puckered his lips and threw a kiss at Zhan.

”It’s not cute. I get really jealous. Like I literally want to drag you far away from them and their dirty gaze.”

”They do not look at me like that, gege!” Yibo burst out laughing. “And even if they do...I don't care.”

”I know…,” Zhan mumbled and rested his chin on his pillow.

”What really bothers you about that?” Yibo asked gently.

”I guess...I just feel like...since you’ve not really...you haven't experienced being with anyone else...haven't had any relationships...that you may be...curious about...girls.”

Yibo’s eyes softened and he tilted his head to one side.

_How do I tell you, Zhan-ge? How do I make you understand just how much I love you and want you, and only you._

”I wish you knew how much you mean to me, Zhan-ge. I know I don't do a good job of expressing myself. But I want you to know...no one...no guy or girl...can even come close to you. You’re my everything. And I’m not curious about girls or any other guys...I could spend my entire life exploring you...learning more about you...loving you.”

Zhan blushed at Yibo’s words. He hid his face in the pillow and groaned.

”Ahhhh...Yibo…! You are so cheesy…”

”Only for you, ge.”

”I’m sorry I get so weird and jealous.”

”I kinda like it,” Yibo smiled but then grew serious. “But I don't want you to feel upset or insecure because of this, ever again.”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded. “I’ll try. I just...sometimes I can’t believe you chose me. It’s going to take some time to...believe that I deserve you...that I’m good enough for you.”

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo frowned and spoke sternly. “Don’t speak that way about my boyfriend. You are more than good enough. You are perfect for me. We were meant to be together.”

”Okay, didi,” Zhan gave the phone a kiss. “Now go back to your dinner. It’s rude, leaving it midway!”

”I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. But yeah...I should head back. You’re...okay right?”

”Yes!” Zhan smiled widely. “You always know how to make me feel better.”

”Good,” Yibo smiled back. “Goodnight, gege. I miss you.”

”Love you, didi.”

”Love you too, Zhan-ge.”

* * *

That night, after dinner, Yibo sat on the balcony and gazed at the stars. He found the two lonely stars that shone side by side and smiled. His mind went back to all the time with Zhan over the summer and since then.

”If I didn't know any better,” a voice interrupted his thoughts, “that look on your face makes it look like you’re deeply in love.”

”Feng-ge!” Yibo startled and sat up straight. “I was just...relaxing.”

”Uhuh,” Qian Feng smirked and sat beside Yibo. “What were you thinking of to _relax_?”

”Nothing in particular,” Yibo rubbed the back of neck nervously.

”I may be wrong,” Qian Feng stared at the night sky, “but I’ve been noticing you the last few weeks. You seem...happier...lighter somehow.”

_It’s so strange._ Yibo pondered over his words. _Being with Zhan-ge makes me feel more secure in my own skin. I feel more confident while talking to others and don't feel as awkward as before with new people._

”Whatever it is,” Qian Feng smiled. “It suits you.”

Yibo only smiled and blushed.

”Or should I say...whoever it is.” he winked at Yibo.

”Feng-ge!!” Yibo covered his face and groaned.

”Don't let them go,” Qian Feng added softly and patted Yibo’s back.

_I don't intend to._ Yibo thought as a warm feeling spread across his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The TTXS Bulgaria episode -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtFFs7bh0KY&list=PLUM8x224JrX_kJm3syb7Fz2zoNP6J-N0N&index=78&t=0s


	51. This is special

* * *

Pretty soon, three weeks had passed and it was the end of November. Zhan’s heart raced as he boarded his flight back home. He fidgeted nervously with his phone as he landed, as he got into the car, as he entered his building, as he entered his apartment. He looked at the clock.

_One more hour and I’ll see Yibo!_ Zhan squealed internally.

For the next thirty minutes, Zhan took a long hot bath and let himself relax. His entire body had been through a lot in the Jade Dynasty shoot. He had bruises and cuts and sore muscles. He sighed as he immersed himself in the hot water. Before he knew it, he jerked awake suddenly.

”Fuck, did I doze off!? Oh shit, what’s the time?” 

Zhan stumbled out of the tub and dashed into his room.

”Phew…,” Zhan let out a sigh of relief. “Twenty more minutes!!” Zhan exclaimed as he struggled to get into his sweats.

* * *

Yibo shuffled excitedly as the elevator made its way to Zhan’s floor. As soon as the door slid open, he jogged towards the door and knocked impatiently. He heard hurried footsteps, and then the door swung open. Two hands reached out and grabbed him by the collar, yanking him inside.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo laughed as a set of lips crashed into his, pushing him against the door.

”God, I missed you!” Zhan muttered in between sloppy kisses. “I missed you so damn much.”

Yibo smiled and pulled him closer, letting himself drown in the wet kisses. 

”So tasty,” Zhan hummed as he increased the fervor of the kiss.

As the minutes progressed, their kiss deepened and Yibo let out a long moan when Zhan began devouring him. His hands grabbed him everywhere and his lips and tongue tasted every inch of his face and neck.

Yibo clutched Zhan’s shirt and leaned into the never ending kiss. He ran his hands through Zhan’s hair and angled his face down to deepen the kiss. He sighed into it as his tongue explored Zhan’s warmth. He licked the lips that were sucking on his passionately. He moved one hand down Zhan’s back and pressed his hips down on him, rolling his body restlessly to close the tiniest gap between them.

Finally, Zhan pulled back, breathless and flushed.

”Hi…,” Yibo smiled, out of breath too.

”Hey…,” Zhan grinned and kissed Yibo’s nose.

”Satisfied?”

”Not even close,” Zhan whispered and bit Yibo’s lower lip.

”I missed you, Zhan-ge,” Yibo smiled fondly and brushed a strand of hair away from Zhan’s eyes.

”I missed you too, Bo-di,” Zhan rested his forehead against Yibo’s.

After a few more kisses and grins, Zhan held Yibo’s hands and walked him inside.

”I cooked for you,” Zhan beamed and gestured to the kitchen.

”Wha...,” Yibo’s jaw dropped. “Didn't you just land?”

”Yeah,” Zhan rubbed the back of his neck, “But I wanted to cook for you.”

”That’s…,” Yibo felt his eyes well up, “that’s so sweet, ge. You didn't have to...you must be so tired.”

”Anything for you, didi,” Zhan dragged him to the dining table and sat him down. “I’ll be right back.”

Yibo watched in awe as Zhan brought out two dishes and plates and some tea.

”It’s nothing fancy. Just some noodles and chicken. I didn't have any fresh groceries. Next time, I can cook something more...special!”

”This _is_ special, Zhan-ge. No one has ever cooked for me before. I mean except for my mom.”

”Well then,” Zhan crinkled his eyes in a smile, “dig in!”

* * *

After dinner, Zhan sat on the couch flipping through channels as Yibo, who had insisted on cleaning up, bustled about the kitchen, washing dishes and arranging the leftover food into containers.

When he came out and walked towards the couch, Zhan stretched out his arms and beckoned to him. Yibo slid down into Zhan’s arms and leaned against his chest, propping his legs up on the coffee table. With one arm around Yibo and one on the remote, Zhan kept browsing until he came across the sports channel.

”Wanna watch the game? You like basketball, right?” Zhan placed the remote down and held Yibo’s hand that was on his thigh.

”You don’t mind?” Yibo tilted his head up and eyed Zhan.

”I don't have a preference,” Zhan shrugged and placed a kiss on his forehead.

”Okay!” Yibo grinned and adjusted himself in Zhan’s arms excitedly.

For the next one hour, Yibo went on to provide commentary on the game, explaining strategy, rules, techniques, his favorite moves, the teams he supports, the players he likes. Zhan smiled fondly and played with Yibo’s hair. He paid as much attention as his fatigue allowed him and asked questions now and then, much to Yibo’s glee.

When the game was done, Yibo pumped a fist in the air as the team he was rooting for won. He turned to Zhan and noticed his eyes half closed as he rested against the couch. Shaking his head, Yibo leaned forward and planted a kiss on Zhan’s lip. Zhan stirred and slowly opened his eyes.

”Bo-di! I’m sorry...I didn't realize I dozed…”

”It’s alright, ge. You need rest. Come on, let’s go inside.”

They made their way in and Yibo changed into one of Zhan’s clean shirts and pyjamas and then climbed into bed next to him. As he wrapped his arm around Zhan’s chest, squeezing him tight, Zhan let out a small yelp and Yibo pulled back immediately.

”What happened?” Yibo asked startled.

”Nothing, my body just...hurts. The shoot was so hectic...especially the stunts.”

”Oh...did you get injured?”

”Nothing major...just some soreness and small bruises.”

Yibo frowned and sat up. He pushed aside the blanket and pulled up Zhan’s shirt. He gasped when he saw multiple bruises and a few scratches all over Zhan’s waist and chest. There were purple spots on his shoulder and a medium sized gash along one side of his waist. With a deepening frown, he forced Zhan to roll on his side and covered his mouth as he saw more bruises, dotting his entire back.

”Zhan-ge!!!”


	52. I have the whole world right here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 6500 views and 400 kudos. I'm crying y'all! This story is so much fun to write and it's so much more fun interacting with y'all through the comments!!

* * *

”Zhan-ge!!! This is not just some soreness and a few bruises.”

”It’s fine, Bo-di,” Zhan sat up and sighed. “Nothing serious. Give it a few days.”

”What did they make you do!??! This is not okay.”

”It’s my fault. I insisted on doing my own stunts.”

”What. Did. They. Make. You. Do.”

”There were water stunts...you know the drowning type. The usual falling and being dragged around on the ground. Oh, and there were some aerial stunts. That’s the bruises on my waist and legs. Because of the harness.”

”There’s more!?” Yibo reached out hurriedly to pull up Zhan’s sweats.

”Ayaa...sweetie,” Zhan held him back by his hands, “I promise...they aren’t as bad as they look.”

Yibo paused at the term of endearment. It was the first time Zhan had called him by a pet name other than ‘Bo-di’ and ‘didi’. If it weren’t for the situation that had caused it, Yibo would have kissed Zhan senseless.

”You have to be more careful, Zhan-ge,” Yibo placed a hand on Zhan’s chest. 

”I am. Just the way you will be when you start training for the race, right?”

”That’s different, ge. I’ll be training with professionals in the proper gear. I know how it is on these sets. It’s riskier. And why did you insist on doing all your stunts. Leave the really dangerous ones for the professionals. That’s literally their job!”

”Okay, okay,” Zhan raised his hands surrendering. “Don’t scold me, didi. I’m injured! It hurts here,” Zhan pointed at his shoulder and pouted.

Yibo shook his head and grinned. He leaned over and placed a loving kiss on the spot. 

”And here,” Zhan smirked and lifted his shirt, pointing to his chest.

Yibo grinned wider and planted another kiss there and then licked the area. Zhan’s breath hitched at the sensation. Yibo sat on Zhan’s lap, his legs on either side of him. Slowly, he lifted his shirt over his head and threw it off.

”Where else does it hurt?” Yibo whispered as he ran a finger down the side of Zhan’s face. 

Zhan shuddered as he dragged Yibo’s finger down to another bruise on his chest. Yibo stuck his tongue out and licked the bruise clean. He pressed his teeth against the purple spot and then wrapped his lips around it.

”Ahh...Yibo…,” Zhan sighed helplessly.

Yibo smirked and made his way down Zhan’s body. He caressed each wound with his tongue and pressed heavy kisses at every point. When he came across a deeper gash by Zhan’s hip, he felt a heaviness in his heart. He kissed around the injury and along the side of the hip, pulling down Zhan’s sweats a little as he went lower.

On hearing Zhan moan, Yibo kissed his inner thigh over the fabric. Encouraged by the deeper groan, Yibo kissed the spot between Zhan’s thigh and groin. Zhan flinched as Yibo moved closer to Zhan’s now erect dick. He glanced at Zhan whose head was thrown back and eyes shut. He placed a soft kiss on the erection and then nibbled on it gently through the fabric, leaving a wetness behind.

Yibo sat up and pressed his own hard-on against Zhan’s.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo spoke huskily. 

Zhan looked up at Yibo as he breathed heavily.

”I want to...taste you.

”Are...are you sure?”

Yibo leaned forward and enveloped Zhan’s trembling lips.

”I want to suck your dick.” Yibo bit Zhan’s ear.

”Fuck.”

”Is that a yes?”

”Fuck yes.”

Yibo shuffled down and pulled Zhan’s pants off in one swift motion. He spread Zhan’s legs and settled between them. He looked at Zhan’s erection in awe.

_He’s definitely a grower not a shower. Fuck. Look at that._

Yibo ran his fingers up and down the shaft and then placed a reverent kiss on the head. He nuzzled Zhan’s dick and placed more kisses along the entire length. Encouraged by Zhan’s gasps, Yibo licked the tip. He teased the head with his tongue and sucked on it ever so lightly, making a popping sound.

”Yibo…,” Zhan sighed and ran his fingers through Yibo’s hair.

_I want to make him feel so good. I don't know if I can do it, but I’m going to try my best._

As if sensing Yibo’s hesitation, Zhan looked down at him and touched him tenderly.

”Hey,” he called out gently. “It’s okay if you don't…”

”I want to…”

”I’ll...I’ll tell you what I need…”

With a relieved nod, Yibo knelt down once more and kissed Zhan up and down his length. He licked the entire underside of the shaft several times, swirling his tongue around the head each time. 

”That feels so good, didi…”

Yibo repeated the motion a few times before proceeding to take a little bit of Zhan’s dick in his mouth. He sucked him off gently and let him go. He went in again, this time going deeper, and created a seal around Zhan, holding on to him firmly in his mouth. He moved his mouth up and down, rubbing his tongue along the underside.

”Yes...fuck…more...,” Zhan murmured. 

Hearing Zhan’s deep voice, Yibo felt his own dick twitch. Spurred on by Zhan’s moans, he took him in entirely and hollowed his cheeks as he felt Zhan reach the back of his throat. Fighting the urge to gag, Yibo licked him like a lollipop, moving up and down, each time making sure Zhan’s head hit against the back of his mouth. Zhan squirmed and clutched the sheets.

”Yibo…,” he barely managed to say, “faster…”

Yibo obliged and increased the pace with which he moved, sucking harder. He grabbed the base with his hand and moved it up and down in sync with his mouth. As Zhan’s groans grew louder, Yibo’s pace quickened. As he felt Zhan grow even longer and harder in his mouth, he let out a moan as well. As Zhan thrust up into him, giving into the pleasure, Yibo felt his eyes water. 

”Bo-di...fuck...I’m…”

Yibo wrapped his mouth around Zhan tighter and sucked him off frantically. He dug his nails into the side of Zhan’s hips, forgetting all about the bruises. He grunted as he took Zhan deeper each time and felt the pleasure shoot straight up his own erection. 

”Didi...let go..I’m...I…”

Before Zhan could finish, he growled loudly and came. Yibo felt a never ending stream of warmth fill his mouth. He didn't move. He didn't let go. He felt it fill him and felt pleasure like he had never felt before.

_Wow. Why does this feel so good for me. I feel so much closer to him and I feel so fucking satisfied seeing him like this. He looks so wrecked._

When Zhan was done, his entire body melted into the bed. He let out a long exhale and finally let go of the sheets. Yibo moved his lips and tongue up and down the now soft shaft a few more times, wrenching out the last bits of cum.

When he was satisfied, he sat up and wiped the corners of his mouth and licked his lips. He gazed at Zhan’s limp body. His eyes were shut, his mouth was half open, his entire body was damp and warm. 

_Fuck. He is so beautiful._

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispered as he crawled up to Zhan’s face, knees on either side of his body.

”Fuck...Bo-di,” Zhan spoke finally and opened his eyes.

”Was it...was I...good?”

Zhan lifted one hand and gently wiped a spot on Yibo’s chin.

”You were...perfect. I saw stars at one point,” he grinned.

”I think I did too...you’re tasty, ge,” Yibo smirked. 

With those words, Zhan grabbed Yibo by the hair and pulled him down into a hard kiss. He could taste himself in Yibo’s mouth and licked whatever remained, reaching deep inside him to show him just how good he was.

When they pulled apart, Zhan tried rolling them over to get on top of Yibo.

”Not tonight,” Yibo placed a kiss on Zhan’s cheek, keeping him down. “You need rest, gege.”

”Come here,” Zhan spread his arms and made space for Yibo.

Yibo scuttled closer and fit in the curve of Zhan’s body like he was the missing piece from the puzzle that was Zhan’s life.

”I love you so much, Wang Yibo. And one day, I’m going to tell the whole world that.”

”I don't care about anyone else, Zhan-ge. As long as you love me, I have the whole world right here.


	53. You show no mercy

* * *

When Yibo woke up, the bed was empty. He stretched and yawned until his entire body had cracked loose. He sat up, looking around and rubbing his eyes. Finally, with a sigh, he stood up and trudged to the bathroom to freshen up.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo muttered as he stepped into the living room. 

”In here, didi,” Zhan’s voice called out to him from another room.

Yibo followed the sound and entered a second room that Zhan had converted into a study. Zhan stood at a desk by the window, shirtless and only in sweats, sketching something on a large sheet of paper. He stood leaning over the drawing, eyeing it carefully, adding small strokes every now and then.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo stood in the doorway, eyeing the glowing skin, that was still dotted with bruises, and the toned arms.

Zhan looked up and beamed at Yibo. He stretched out his hand, gesturing him to join him. Yibo walked over and leaned his head on Zhan’s shoulder, his hands grazing down Zhan’s naked back. 

”Goodmorning,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s temple. “Did you sleep well?”

”Hmm,” Yibo straightened again and glanced at the sketch. “What is that?”

”I figured it out,” Zhan sat Yibo down on his chair and rubbed his hands in excitement.

”Figured what out?”

”There’s a loophole in my contract.”

”With Wajijiwa?”

”Yup!” Zhan hopped in place. “Although I’m stuck with them for several more years, there is nothing in that contract that can stop me from promoting myself.”

”Okay...and…?”

”So…,” Zhan tucked his lower lip under his bunny teeth, “when the time is right, I am going to open my own studio to handle my PR and promotions!!”

”Oh…,” Yibo’s eyes widened as he realized what Zhan meant. “That’s...that’s actually a brilliant idea!”

”And this is going to be my studio’s logo! I designed it myself.”

”Wow….you did this? This morning? You’re so talented, ge!!”

”I don't know...I just woke up feeling motivated and this idea...and this logo just came to me. Do you like it?” Zhan held the sheet up to Yibo’s face.

”I love it, Zhan-ge! It looks so elegant and professional. I like this golden color and the strokes are so...you.”

”Bo-di!” Zhan squealed and leaned down for a kiss. Yibo laughed and pulled him down onto his lap and deepened the kiss. 

”It’s nice seeing you this excited…”

”I’m feeling really good...like there’s hope to get out of this mess.”

”I know you can do it, ge.”

”Anyway,” Zhan sat comfortably on Yibo’s lap, “I have dress rehearsals today. And then tomorrow is the big concert.”

”I have a photoshoot this afternoon too, but I can come over to the rehearsal later…”

”Oh god! I’ll be so shy!!”

”Oh...then I won’t...,” Yibo’s face fell.

”But I want you to come…,” Zhan held Yibo’s face in his hands. “It’ll make me less nervous too.”

”Really?”

”Really,” Zhan smiled and kissed Yibo’s nose. “Do you think...you can come for tomorrow’s concert?”

”No,” Yibo pouted. “I have One more try. That’s why I want to come today.”

”That’s fine. I’ll see you later today.”

”Hmm…,” Yibo hummed as Zhan kissed him once more. 

”Maybe one day,” Yibo suddenly pulled back, “you can design the logo for my own brand?”

”I would love that, didi!”

”Will you charge me like your other clients?” Yibo batted his eyelids.

”Not in cash, maybe. But you’ll have to pay in kind,” Zhan smirked and pulled on Yibo’s lower lip with his teeth. 

”I’ll pay whatever it costs…,” Yibo muttered.

”Even if it takes you an entire lifetime to pay me back?”

”Gladly.” Yibo held Zhan’s chin and looked him straight in the eye. “I’ll pay for the rest of my life…”

”I’ll hold you to that promise, Bo-di.”

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo murmured as Zhan kissed his way down Yibo’s neck.

Zhan got off Yibo’s lap and sat on his knees between Yibo’s legs. He massaged Yibo’s thighs with long slow strokes as his lips kissed circles down his chest. Eventually, his hands tugged on the waistband of Yibo’s pyjama.

”Zhan-ge...you're still healing…”

”I’m hungry,” Zhan interrupted him with a low voice as he pulled off Yibo’s pant and bit down on the spot where his thigh met his hip.

”Ahh…,” Yibo whined as he arched his back away from the chair.

Zhan sat back and stared at Yibo’s squirming body. His eyes trailed from Yibo’s hard calves up his toned thighs and rested on the now erect dick.

_Wow. I could feel how big he was when I gave him a handjob but looking at it now...fuck...he’s so thick._

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo’s shy voice drew his attention. 

Zhan looked up and saw an embarrassed smile on his face. 

”You’re fucking hot, Yibo,” Zhan looked at him with pure lust.

”Ge,” Yibo looked away, blushing. 

”Now it’s my turn to taste you...do you remember your promise?” Zhan smirked.

”Promise?” Yibo blinked a few times.

”That you’ll come on my face, didi,” Zhan stretched the last word sweetly and his smirk widened as he saw Yibo’s ears turn pink.

Before Yibo could say anything in response, Zhan leaned in and in one smooth motion took Yibo’s entire length in his hungry mouth.

”Fuck, Zhan-ge!!” Yibo screamed as he felt electricity shoot up his entire body.

Zhan left a wet sticky trail as he licked his way back down and let go of Yibo’s shaft with a pop.

”Told you I’m hungry.”

Without wasting any time, Zhan engulfed the head and swirled his tongue around it, pressing in on the underside each time. He nibbled on the cleft and when Yibo moaned louder, he dove in and took the entire shaft in his mouth once more. 

_Fuck. He is so hot. I just want to eat him up and hear him say my name helplessly._

Zhan didn't hold back. He kept gliding his tongue and mouth up and down Yibo, sucking harder and faster each time. He didn't need to use his hands, deep throating him each time greedily. When he felt Yibo grab on to his hair, Zhan felt his own dick hurt in arousal.

Hurriedly, he started stroking himself in time with his movements on Yibo. The pleasure that engulfed his body only drove him to devour Yibo harder. Zhan sealed his lips around Yibo’s length when he felt his body shudder and quiver beneath him. 

”Zhan-ge....I…”

Zhan pulled back and used his other hand to continue squeezing Yibo, harder and faster, relentless. 

”Come for me, sweetie,” Zhan stared at Yibo and whispered.

On hearing the endearing pet name juxtaposed with the commanding tone of Zhan’s voice, Yibo’s entire body jerked and he felt his soul rush out of his body. Zhan felt the hot stream hit him hard and it was enough to send him over the edge too. He groaned and threw his head back as he came onto the floor as well.

Yibo looked down and watched as Zhan kept massaging him through his orgasm and took the cum on his face and neck. When he was done, cum lined Zhan’s mouth and was dripping down his lips. Zhan’s lips were parted and he was panting as his tongue darted out, licking the slick off.

”Fuck...ge…,” Yibo spoke breathlessly.

”Mmm…,” Zhan hummed as he wiped some slick off with his finger and put it in his mouth for another taste. “So good…”

”That was...better than good...it was…,” Yibo exhaled and sunk further into the chair.

Zhan sat up on his knee and reached out for a tissue from the desk and cleaned his face and neck. Once done, he cleaned up the mess he had made on the floor and wiped any remaining spots on Yibo’s body. With a satisfied sigh, he sat on Yibo’s lap once again and nuzzled against his sweaty chest.

”It was fucking great,” he chuckled. 

”You show no mercy, ge!”

”You liked it…,” Zhan looked up, resting his chin on Yibo’s chest.

”I did,” Yibo brushed aside some hair from Zhan’s forehead and grinned. “I liked it a lot.”


	54. Satisfied

* * *

Zhan reached the concert venue and was immediately pulled backstage by the crew. As he was dressed and patted and prepped, Zhan went over all the choreography nervously in his head as he paced back and forth. 

”Don't worry,” Chu Yue’s voice interrupted his mental run through. “We’re going to rock this show!”

”I just don't want to screw this up,” Zhan sighed.

”You won't,” Chu Yue smiled and squeezed his shoulder. “Let’s go.”

They walked to the stage and Zhan waved to his other band mates. They got into position for the first song - Big Show. Everything went well and Zhan gained more confidence as they breezed through the next two songs - You can’t tell me and Boys. Boys was one of his favorite songs. He knew the choreography well and the beats were easygoing and upbeat. 

He had a break as a subset of the band performed the next song. But before he knew it, it was time for their next set. After the two songs were done, Zhan had a longer break. He sat through the solos, duets, and subgroups, his eyes roaming around occasionally, hoping to catch sight of Yibo. His solo - Satisfied - was going to come up next.

When it was his turn, he took the mic and felt a calm take over. This was his moment. This was all him. His comfort zone. There was no choreography, no razzle dazzle, no glitz and glamour. Just him, his words, and his voice. 

He had written the song one day when he was lonely. He imagined what his ideal life would look like. What it would feel like to be satisfied. He had envisioned his perfect life.

_I was so naive._ Zhan smiled and shook his head as the melody began. _What did I know then? That my perfect life would look like this. A messy situation with my management. A chaotic schedule grabbing at any and every opportunity to move forward. And a person who loves me with all his heart and soul. This is my perfect life. I’m already satisfied._

As Zhan began singing the lyrics, he felt the surrounding lights and sounds and movements blur away. He closed his eyes and let the words take over.

_I fill my eyes with soft messages  
I hold a letter from you in my hands  
The sights of your city, the curves of your lips  
I gradually begin to see it clearly  
The screen shows a scene full of warmth  
Memories are like a film that keeps spinning  
I record each frame by the scale of time  
This has become the most precious souvenir._

Zhan opened his eyes and immediately noticed a tall figure make its way down the corner stairs and sneak into one of the middle rows. The figure had a black sweatshirt and cap on with a mask around their face. But Zhan knew. He smiled and sang the next words with even more fervor as he walked to the edge of the stage in the direction of the seated figure.

_I just want to protect what you’ve given me with all my heart  
The little things about us are everything to me  
Even if our memories become blurred  
I won’t forget our beginnings  
Once you learn to face loneliness, there’s no turning back  
Because of your smile, I won’t be let down  
Regardless of how hard it gets in the future  
As long as you’re by my side, I’ll be satisfied._

His smile widened as the person gave him a small wave and pulled down his mask. His heart fluttered seeing the happy face smiling back at him, watching him intensely as he continued singing.

_Let the wind blow away the meaningless words  
All that’ll be left is the promise we made to stay together  
Use the warmth of your eyes and the calligraphy of our love  
To mark down these unforgettable moments  
I just want to protect what you’ve given me with all my heart  
The little things about us are everything to me  
Even if our memories become blurred  
I won’t forget our beginnings  
Once you learn to face loneliness, there’s no turning back  
Because of your smile, I won’t be let down  
Regardless of how hard it gets in the future  
As long as you’re by my side, I’ll be satisfied  
_

When the music ended, Zhan held the mic to his chest and stood still, gazing at Yibo.

* * *

Yibo sat mesmerized as he watched Zhan walking across the stage, lifting each note effortlessly. His voice was like smooth honey that formed a protective envelope all around him, making everything sweeter and better and more beautiful. He listened as Zhan sang each word with so much emotion.

His heart skipped a beat when Zhan looked in his direction and smiled. He pulled his mask down and waved but his body wanted to run forward and lift Zhan up and twirl him around. It felt like it was just the two of them there as Zhan sang the lyrics to him and him alone.

_Let the wind blow away the meaningless words  
All that’ll be left is the promise we made to stay together_

_Always, ge._ Yibo thought with a smile. _Always together. Nothing can tear us apart. I promise._

_Regardless of how hard it gets in the future  
As long as you’re by my side, I’ll be satisfied_

_I love you so much._ Yibo felt his eyes tear up as he gazed at Zhan fondly. _I am never letting you go. I will do everything in my power to make you happy for the rest of our lives._

When the music stopped, Zhan lingered around the edge of the stage, gazing at Yibo. Finally, he waved at Yibo and then walked back to the crew and soon was engrossed in a conversation with them about the sound speakers, mic settings and lighting.

Yibo relaxed back against the seat as another solo was performed by one of the other band members.

_Not as good as ge. Not even close._ He shook his head.

Then, the entire group came out once more and sang a song which was more sentimental and about friendship and their time together. Yibo felt nostalgic about his Uniq days and all the fun times they had shared. 

_I should message them. It’s been so long since we spoke and caught up with each other’s lives._

After the group performance, there were more solos and subgroup performances. Yibo fiddled with his phone, glancing up occasionally. During one of the solos, he noticed Zhan and Chu Yue off to one side of the stage, watching the performance and discussing something. They were standing close and covering their mouths with their hands when talking. 

Yibo watched with a mild frown as Chu Yue leaned in each time while speaking, pointing to the performers every now and then. When the next piece started, Chu Yue turned to face Zhan and leaned in even closer. With his back to Yibo and his face tilted, the angle made it seem like he was too close to Zhan.

_Why the fuck is he standing so close._ Yibo clenched his phone. 

Much to his relief, when the next song began, Zhan and Chu Yue walked on stage and joined the two others and they performed a strong vocal piece. Yibo calmed down and started enjoying the performance again. But his relaxation lasted only a few minutes, when the music dropped and out walked four girls.

_Oh fuck. Not this again._ Yibo groaned and ran a hand down his face. _And I can’t even say anything after I told Zhan-ge not to get jealous when I dance with girls. Now, I get it._

Yibo bit his lips nervously as they danced for the next few minutes. Each time, Zhan and his partner looked at each other seductively or Zhan’s hands lingered over her body, he felt his own body wind up tight. The worst part was the end when Zhan took her arms and wrapped them around his neck.

_Get the fuck away from him!_ He screamed at the girl internally.

He gave out a long exhale when the song ended and some more subgroups performed on stage. The entire group came back out on stage for the final set of songs and Yibo couldn’t help but smile as he watched Zhan bounce around happily. He admired every expression on his boyfriend’s face as they moved from one song to the next. He lusted after every part of his body as he moved and swayed and mouthed the words.

_Who cares about the others. I’m the only one who gets to go home with that man._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some reference videos -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OmDU9Rl2-Bk  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgV1V75bMGA&feature=youtu.be&t=36


	55. Just you and me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 7000 views!! Thanks you guys!!

* * *

”Alright, that was awesome!” Chu Yue announced as they wrapped up the final run through. 

All the boys huddled together as they cheered and encouraged each for the concert the next day. When they pulled apart, Zhan turned around to look for Yibo. When he saw him still seated, he gestured for him to come join them. Yibo walked over hurriedly and waved and bowed at everyone as he joined them backstage.

Zhan resisted the urge to hug him and kiss him then and there. He smiled and squeezed his shoulder instead.

”So...did you like it?”

”Yes!” Yibo smiled slightly embarrassed that everyone’s attention was now on him. “It was very energetic and you guys gave it your all. I’m sure it’s going to go great tomorrow!”

”Thanks, bro!” Yan Xujia stepped forward and clasped hands with Yibo as they bumped shoulders. “Good to see you again.”

Yibo nodded and smiled back.

”Nice to see you...again,” Chu Yue crossed his arms across his chest and stared flatly at Yibo.

”Nice to see you...too,” Yibo resumed his poker face. 

”Yibo won't be able to attend the concert tomorrow so I thought he could get a glimpse of it today,” Zhan smiled and patted Yibo’s back. 

”That’s nice,” Chu Yue replied.

_What the fuck is your problem, dude!?_ Yibo exclaimed inwardly. 

Zhan sensed the coldness once more and decided to intervene. But before he could say anything, Wu Jiacheng spoke up.

”Alright, I’m out…,” he stretched. “Gotta clean up and get my beauty sleep,” he winked before walking off.

Slowly, the others filed out as well saying their goodbyes and bowing to Yibo before heading out. Eventually only the three of them remained.

_What is it about Chu Yue that riles Yibo up so much!? It’s not like he even touched me today._

Zhan cleared his throat and wiped his face with his sleeve.

”I think we should head back too,” he smiled.

”Yeah, we should,” both Yibo and Chu Yue spoke simultaneously.

Both boys immediately froze and levelled their gazes on each other once again before glancing at Zhan, who was blinking and looking at them both alternately.

”I can drop you to your apartment, Zhan-Zhan,” Chu Yue spoke first, “like always.”

Yibo felt his entire body tense up. Before he could reign in his emotions, he felt a harsh voice escape his lips.

”No need for that any more,” he spoke abruptly. “We’ll be heading back together anyway.”

”It’s okay, ChuYue,” Zhan laughed nervously and patted the boy on his arm. “We had some work to do so Yibo can take me back. Not a big deal.”

”Hmm,” ChuYue nodded and squeezed Zhan’s arm with a smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

”Yup,” Zhan beamed, relieved when he felt some tension ease off. “See you.”

When they reached the bike, Yibo handed Zhan his helmet silently. Zhan eyed Yibo as he buckled the helmet in place and sat behind him. Despite the awkwardness of before, Zhan couldn't help but hold on tight as they sliced their way through the cool night breeze, enjoying every minute of the thrilling ride back. 

When they reached Zhan’s apartment, Yibo sat down and removed his boots and jacket. Zhan leaned against the couch as he watched him in silence.

”What is it with you two?” Zhan spoke finally.

Yibo’s hands paused and he stilled. Slowly, he looked up and stared at Zhan with a frown.

”He likes you.”

Zhan’s eyes widened and he burst into laughter. He clutched his sides and sat on the back of the couch as his legs grew weak.

”Chu Yue!?” Zhan gasped for breath. “Are you insane?”

”I’m serious.”

”Oh, didi,” Zhan wiped his eyes and walked over to Yibo. “You’re just jealous...of what I don't know...we didn't even touch today. There was no manhandling.”

”I can see it in his eyes, ge. He likes you. And he doesn’t like that we’re close.” Yibo stood up and walked towards the kitchen.

”Yibo ah Yibo….,” Zhan followed him, shaking his head. “I think you’re just overthinking…”

”Am I, ge? How can you be so blind?”

”Hey,” Zhan was astonished at his tone. “Okay, I’m sorry. I don't mean to dismiss your feelings. But even if you’re right,” he put his arms around Yibo’s neck and pulled him close, “it doesn’t matter. Remember?”

Yibo leaned in closer and rested his forehead against Zhan’s.

”It’s just you and me, sweetie,” Zhan whispered gently.

”Mmm,” Yibo sighed. “Just you and me.”

”That’s right,” Zhan smiled and took Yibo’s lips in his.

When they pulled back, a soft smile appeared on Yibo’s face.

”Sorry, ge…”

”It’s alright. But next time, try and be nicer to him. He is one of my closest friends. And I don't want it to be awkward when the two of you are around together. Can you do that, didi?”

”Hmm, I’ll try,” Yibo pouted. “But if he crosses a line...I’m going to punch the shit out of his face…”

”Fine, fine,” Zhan chuckled and kissed Yibo’s cheek. “My baby lion.”

”I’m not a baby!”

Zhan only laughed louder at that and Yibo smacked his arm. Soon they devolved into a fit of laughter and slaps as they wrestled and tugged at each other. 

”Okay, I give up!” Zhan finally pleaded. “Have mercy. My entire body is still sore.”

”Oh!” Yibo froze. “Sorry, ge. I forgot!!”

”It’ll be fine in a few more days,” Zhan shrugged.

”Hmm,” Yibo frowned. “You should rest now. And I need to head back any way. I have an early morning at the race tracks tomorrow.

”I love you, my hot racer,” Zhan smiled fondly as he wrapped Yibo into a tight hug. “Take care, okay?”

”I will,” Yibo smiled and kissed Zhan’s shoulder. 

After a long deep kiss, Zhan let go of Yibo unwillingly. 

”I miss you already,” he sighed.

”I miss you more,” Yibo grinned and placed a kiss on Zhan’s forehead.

”That’s not possible,” Zhan grinned back.


	56. You've missed a lot

* * *

The concert was a huge success and Zhan was extremely satisfied with his performance. Once backstage, all the boys were screaming and cheering as they high fived each other and jumped about, pumped and thrilled. Zhan watched them fondly as he gulped down another bottle of water. He had already gone through a whole box of tissues wiping the never ending sweat off his face and neck and now half his make up was off as well. 

”Well...that’s finally done!” Chu Yue approached him with a wide smile. “Congratulations!”

”Thank god for that!” Zhan accepted his extended hand and leaned in as they bumped shoulders. 

”Are you going to join us for the after party or leaving?” Chu Yue raised an eyebrow.

”Like hell he is!!” Wu Jiacheng strutted over and wrapped an arm around Zhan’s shoulders. “We have to celebrate together!!”

”Yes, yes,” Zhan grinned as he peeled Jiacheng off him. “Of course I am coming.”

”Come on, let’s go!” Jiacheng grabbed Zhan by the arm.

”I’ll be right there...give me a few minutes,” Zhan stayed back and took his phone out.

”Oh Mr. Busy Busy,” Jiacheng whined, “has to reply to so many fan messages and emails!”

”Shut up, A-Cheng!” Zhan grinned and bared his teeth at the giggling boy. “Chu Yue can you control this boy. I’ll join you guys in some.”

”Hmm,” Chu Yue nodded quietly as he walked away, allowing Jiacheng to drag him along instead.

> _Zhan: All done!! The concert was a hit! Everything went smoothly.  
>    
>  Bo-di: That’s awesome, ge! What plans now?  
>    
>  Zhan: Going out to celebrate with the boys. You?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Still shooting. But I learnt a new trick on the skateboard! I’ll show you in person later, okay?  
>    
>  Zhan: Sure, didi 😘  
>    
>  Bo-di: I wish I could come, but you have fun, okay?  
>    
>  Zhan: I wish you were here too. I’ll message you later. _

Zhan sighed and jogged ahead to join the remaining group. Chu Yue smiled at him and they all headed towards their cars. 

”Where are we heading?” Zhan inquired.

”The after party’s at mommy’s home,” Xujia chuckled.

”Stop calling me that!” Chu Yue smacked the cackling boy.

”But it’s true, you were the mother hen!”

”Shut up! “

”Alright, you two. Quit it, Xujia. Say sorry.”

”Fine!!” Xujia smirked. “Sorry...mommy!”

The rest of the group laughed as the two bickered for the rest of the drive until Zhan intervened again. Once at Chu Yue’s apartment, they ran up and immediately got comfortable as some people ordered food, others brought out the drinks, someone started the gaming console, someone else started the karaoke machine and yet another person brought out some snacks.

”No no…,” Chu Yue spoke dryly, “don’t be shy...go on...make yourself at home,” he shook his head as everyone swarmed all over his place.

”It’s been so long since we all hung out like this,” Zhan chuckled and patted Chu Yue on the back.

”Yeah,” Chu Yue sighed, “everyone’s starting to get busy with their own careers.” He draped his arm around Zhan’s shoulder as they watched the chaos unfold.

”Alright...let’s do this,” Zhan smiled at the group fondly and finally pulled away. “Let’s party!!”

* * *

After stuffing their faces with food they definitely should have been avoiding as part of their diets, and going through everyone for a round of karaoke, the boys crashed on the various couches and cushions, some even sprawled on the ground. The doorbell rang and everyone sat up once again.

”Who’s that?” Chu Yue cocked his head.

”Oh, Zexi and I invited some people,” Gu Jiacheng replied. 

”Why are you blushing?” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

”Maybe because they invited their girlfriends!” Xujia announced as he led two shy girls into the hall.

”Girlfriends?” Zhan mumbled quietly to Chu Yue as everyone greeted the girls as if already familiar with them.

”Oh that’s right,” Chu Yue smirked. “You’ve been away a lot, Zhan-Zhan. They’ve been dating them for a few months now.”

”Thank god you guys did,” Zhao Lei sighed in relief, “Otherwise I would have felt really guilty about inviting my significant other!” He grinned.

”You’re dating too?!” Zhan blurted.

”Also a recent development,” Chu Yue whispered, nudging Zhan by the shoulder. “And don't freak out like this when you see him.”

” _Him_?!” Zhan nearly choked.

”Yeah...and he’s very happy,” Chu Yue looked at Zhao Lei with a soft smile on his face.

”Oh wow. I’ve missed a lot.” Zhan ran a hand through his hair.

”Yeah,” Chu Yue tilted his head towards him. “You have missed a lot.”

Zhan turned to look at him and immediately felt guilty. But before he could say anything, another doorbell drew everyone’s attention.

”Aww...look at Lei-Lei blush!” Everyone cooed as the boy made his way to the door.

Zhan watched in awe as he walked back in, hand in hand with his boyfriend. A rush of excitement passed through his entire body as he began looking at his band mates in a new light.

_We’re all moving onto the next stage of our lives together. And they...they’re so open about it...so happy and welcoming to these new members of our family. Maybe...I could...bring Yibo in too._

Zhan felt giddy at the thought and immediately pulled his phone out. Downing his third beer, he typed out a hurried message.

> _Zhan: I miss you, didi! If you have time and energy after your shoot, come over!  
>    
>  Zhan: Looks like I’m going to be here a while.  
>    
>  Zhan: And I‘m learning so much! Some of the boys are dating. And their partners are here too!  
>    
>  Zhan: And you won't believe this, but Zhao Lei’s boyfriend is here!  
>    
>  Zhan: I want my boyfriend here too! I want you to meet my friends properly. As my boyfriend, I mean…  
>    
>  Zhan: Only if you want that too, of course.  
>    
>  Zhan: I’m sending you the address in case you want to come. No pressure though! _

”Looks like you have some updates too,” Chu Yue took another sip of his drink and gestured at Zhan’s phone.

”I...uhh...not exactly.” Zhan bit his lip.

”Are you sure?”

”Come on, Chu Yue,” Zhan ruffled his hair with a smile, “let’s get another drink.”

They made their way to the kitchen and Zhan grabbed another beer. He leaned against the counter as he popped it open.

”Actually,” Chu Yue spoke hesitantly, “I wanted to ask you something.”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded as he took another sip. “What’s up?”

”Umm...I was wondering if you wanted to...go get a drink sometime?”

”We are drinking,” Zhan chuckled, “right now.”

”No...yes...I mean,” Chu Yue gulped down his remaining drink, “just us...you know...to catch up. I feel like I haven't seen you in ages. We don't ...talk like we used to.”

”I know,” Zhan put his drink down, “and I’m sorry for that. I’ve been a bad friend. Yeah, we totally should. I’m flexible this month. Don’t really have many engagements. Plus, no stage for New Years too.” Zhan pouted.

”It’s frustrating isn't it? This whole Wajijiwa stuff. But I’m happy with my decision.”

”Me too.” Zhan raised his beer and clinked it against Chu Yue’s glass. 

They went on chatting about Wajijiwa, about their work, their struggles, old memories, new happenings that Zhan had been missing out on and finally the update of how Zhao Lei met his now boyfriend. Zhan gaped at Chu Yue as he shared their story and when he was done, they were smiling happily for their friend. For a moment it felt like Chu Yue wanted to say something but wasn't going to. Zhan stared at him intently and then turned to face him.

”Is everything okay? You look...weird.”

”I just...I think...I’m ready for a partner too,” Chu Yue bit his lip. “You know?”

”I’m sure any person will be lucky to have you as their partner,” Zhan smiled at the nervous boy.

”Yeah...it’s not that simple...I think...I like someone...but it’s complicated.”

”Why? What’s the problem?” Zhan asked concerned.

”Because he’s one of my closest friends.”

”Oh!” Zhan nodded along. “That is a tricky situation. Do you think he likes you?”

”Sometimes I think he could. If he...allowed himself to...think about me that way…”

”You just have to be honest with him,” Zhan thought back to how he had confessed to Yibo. “It might be scary as fuck but either way, you’ll at least have an answer.”

”Really?”

”Really.” Zhan smiled at him comfortingly.

”Okay,” Chu Yue seemed to ponder over his words a little. “Well then,” he turned his body to Zhan, “I guess that’s what I’ll have to do.”

”Good,” Zhan began saying but then paused when he noticed Chu Yue’s intense stare. “Uhh...what…”

”Zhan-Zhan,” Chu Yue looked at him nervously. “I...I like you…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No hate please! I just added this as an interesting subplot. I love Peng Chu Yue, he is my second favorite X-Nine member! Hope y'all enjoy this twist. Don't panic. Everything will be okay.


	57. Called it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said don't panic! And yet, the comments!! I can't with y'all 😂

* * *

Zhan’s mouth dropped. His brain went into panic mode as Chu Yue’s words rang in his ears. And then Yibo’s words rang in his ears.

_Fuck. Yibo was right. How did he see it and I didn't?! What the fuck am I supposed to do now? How do I handle this without hurting my friend?_

Just then, Wu Jiacheng poked his head into the kitchen.

”Uhh...Xiao Zhan...there’s someone here for you.”

”Who?” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

”Wang Yibo.”

”Oh…,” Zhan cursed mentally. “I...I’ll be right there.”

”Chu Yue,” Zhan muttered when Jiacheng left with a nod, “I...I’m sorry...I…”

”It’s fine,” Chu Yue let out a sigh. “Honestly, it’s what I expected,” he gave him a small smile. “But I had to tell you.”

”I’m glad you did,” Zhan squeezed his shoulder. “I’m really glad you did. And I just hope...this doesn’t affect our friendship. I care about you a lot.”

”Hmm, it won't.” Chu Yue nodded and turned away. “So...are you and Wang Yibo...”

Zhan turned away as well and leaned against the counter once more. For a while, both remained silent.

”Are you happy?” 

Zhan nodded slowly.

”Good,” Chue Yue spoke softly.

Before Zhan could say anything, Yibo entered the kitchen. His face lit up when he saw Zhan but dropped a little when he saw Chu Yue beside him. He made his way to them but stopped a few feet away. Chu Yue straightened up and took a deep breath. He walked towards the door but paused in front of Yibo.

”You’re one hell of a lucky guy. Don't ever forget that.”

With those words, Chu Yue patted Yibo’s shoulder and with a smile, left the kitchen.

Yibo stood there staring at Zhan, who shuffled nervously.

”Guess you were right,” Zhan felt his eyes burn.

Yibo walked over and placed a hand on Zhan’s cheek.

”Are you...okay?”

Zhan looked up at Yibo and smiled meekly.

”I think so…”

”You don't have to tell them about us if you think it will make things worse.”

”He knows...and I want everyone to know and welcome you into our little family.”

”Are you sure?” Yibo caressed Zhan’s cheek.

”Yes,” Zhan leaned into the touch. “I want to. I don't want to hide such an important part of my life.”

”Whatever you want,” Yibo smiled and placed a kiss on Zhan’s cheek.

Yibo grabbed two beers and they walked out of the kitchen, hand in hand.

* * *

”There you are Zhan-Zha…,” Zhao Lei exclaimed but then paused mid sentence as his eyes trailed down to where Yibo’s hand held onto Zhan’s.

There was immediate silence in the room and everyone stared at them, as Zhan smiled and tightened his hand around Yibo’s.

”Everyone,” Zhan began with an ever widening smile, “I want to officially introduce you to my _boyfriend_ , Wang Yibo.”

Yibo looked at them with an embarrassed but joyful smile. No one else broke the silence and Zhan waited with a grin on his face as he saw the shock on their faces. But the next minute, it was his turn to be shocked.

”Called it!” Wu Jiacheng exclaimed loudly. “All of you owe Zhao Lei, Xujia and me a thousand Yuan each and you have to fulfil your promise of dancing around in pink tutus!”

”Cheers!” Xujia and Zhao Lei raised their glasses simultaneously and clinked Wu Jiacheng’s glass.

”Told y’all!” Xujia smirked.

”Wait, wha…,” Zhan asked in disbelief. “What is going on?”

”We had a bet going on,” Zhao Lei shrugged. 

”You guys had a bet? That Yibo and I are together?!”

”Yep,” they began giggling. 

”What the fuck?” Zhan blurted. “Since when!?”

”Since he showed up at our rehearsal. Duh!!” Wu Jiacheng rolled his eyes. “It was so obvious. But these idiots didn't believe us.”

Zhan was about to say something when he heard chuckling beside him. He turned to see Yibo trying to control his cackles but failing to do so. Seeing Zhan’s bewildered face, Yibo burst into laughter.

”Yibo! Do you think this is funny?!”

”Kinda is, ge!” Yibo doubled down. “So…,” he faced the boys again, “do I get a share of the loot?”

”No,” Zhao Lei grinned, “you’ve already got yourself a prize,” he winked.

”Fair enough,” Yibo grinned and raised Zhan’s hand to his lips and placed a soft kiss.

”Awwwwww,” everyone cooed together.

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan flushed and smacked his arm.

Yibo chuckled again and then turned around and looked at Chu Yue. Zhan bit his lip nervously, unsure of what Yibo would do next. His panic grew as Yibo let go of his hand and made his way to Chu Yue who was leaning against the wall. When they were face to face, Chu Yue straightened up, not flinching from Yibo’s stare. Everyone else had returned to their chatter but Zhan was rooted to his spot, eyeing them worriedly.

Yibo raised one of the beer bottles and offered it to Chu Yue. Slowly, a small smile crept on his face and he jerked his chin, gesturing Chu Yue to accept the peace offering. Chu Yue grinned in return and accepted the drink and they clinked their bottles together. They took a sip and then Yibo nodded and made his way back to Zhan, while Chu Yue joined the rest. As Yibo approached Zhan, Zhan couldn't help but feel a warmth through his entire body.

_He remembered what I said. He knows how important Chu Yue and the rest of them are to me._

”I love you,” Yibo mouthed quietly as they intertwined their fingers.

They made their way to the group and took a seat on the floor beside Zhao Lei and his boyfriend. Yibo leaned against the coffee table that had been moved back to make space for everyone and propped one knee up. Zhan sat down between his legs and leaned back against Yibo. Yibo felt a flutter in his heart as Zhan nestled against him. 

_I didn't think I cared about anyone knowing, but I do. Being able to be ourselves in front of others...acknowledging this relationship...makes it feel all the more real. One day, I want everyone that’s important to me to know too. I want our families to know. Fuck, if I could, I would want the whole world to know that Xiao Zhan is mine and I am his._

He wrapped himself around Zhan tighter as they got comfortable. For the rest of the night, he didn't pay attention to the conversations around him. All he could focus on was the feeling of Zhan in his arms and the intense happiness in his heart.


	58. I want to feel closer to you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 7500 views 😭😭😭😭😭

* * *

Zhan unlocked his door and led Yibo inside. With a sigh, he dropped his things to the ground and removed his jacket.

”I’m going to take a shower...okay?”

Yibo nodded and plonked down on the couch, starting one of the video games. After a round, he looked up and saw Zhan step out, fresh faced and wet. Yibo smiled and pulled Zhan down on top of him. Zhan sat on his lap, knees on either side, and leaned in for a kiss. 

”You must be exhausted,” Yibo tucked some strands of hair away from Zhan’s face.

”Yeah,” Zhan rested his forehead against Yibo’s shoulder.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo kissed his temple. “Let’s go inside.”

”I love you, Wang Yibo,” Zhan suddenly blurted.

”I love you too,” Yibo chuckled.

”No...I mean...I really fucking love you.”

”I know that, ge,” Yibo nudged Zhan’s head. 

”You don't understand,” Zhan sat up and squished Yibo’s face between his hands. “I really really love you.”

”You’re tipsy,” Yibo shook his head and kissed Zhan’s nose.

”Maybe a little but I want you to know...how much I love you. I don't think I can imagine my life without you. I don't even know how I lived without you before. I feel invincible when I think of us. I know I can get through anything with you by my side. I’ve never felt this way. I don't know how to express exactly how bad I’ve got it. “

”I know, sweetheart,” Yibo whispered gently, smiling in amusement. 

Zhan blinked as he heard the word.

”Say it again.”

”Say what?”

”Say the last bit again…”

”Sweetheart?”

”Mmm,” Zhan nodded softly and blushed.

”Sweetheart,” Yibo smiled and placed a kiss on Zhan’s lips.

”Again,” Zhan looked away.

”Sweetheart,” Yibo murmured into Zhan’s ear and placed another kiss on the earlobe.

He felt a shudder pass through Zhan’s body and licked his lips. He placed kisses down the side of Zhan’s neck and then down to his collarbone. 

”Sweetheart,” he repeated. “You’re my sweetheart.”

”Yibo,” Zhan gasped as the affectionate pet name did something to his mind and body.

”Hmm,” Yibo hummed as he kissed Zhan’s throat, sucking on his apple.

”I...I want you..”

”You have me…”

”I want to feel closer to you…”

”How is that even possible?” Yibo kissed Zhan’s cheek with a smile.

Zhan bit his lip and stared at Yibo nervously. Yibo stared into Zhan’s eyes and slowly, realization struck. He gulped as he began to understand what Zhan wanted. 

”I...if you’re not ready,” Zhan stuttered as he looked away. “I can wait...we don't have to…”

”No,” Yibo’s breath stuttered as well, “I...I do...I want to…”

”Really?” Zhan’s eyes snapped back to Yibo. 

”I want everything with you, Zhan-ge.”

”Are you...sure? Do you understand what I’m asking?”

”I’m not that stupid, ge,” Yibo snickered and bit Zhan’s cheek.

”Yeah, but…”, Zhan fidgeted with Yibo’s shirt.

”I trust you, Xiao Zhan,” Yibo spoke seriously. “I want to experience everything with you.”

”Fuck,” Zhan felt his mouth go dry. “I want you. I want to be inside you!” Zhan blurted.

For a brief second, Yibo’s eyes widened. Slowly, nervously, he clutched Zhan’s shirt and nodded. They sat still and stared at each other, a nervous energy lingering between them. Finally, when Yibo's eyes moved to Zhan's lips, Zhan pounced ahead and crashed his lips against Yibo’s and pulled them together tightly. He devoured Yibo with his tongue and with every moan that Yibo let out, he dove in deeper. 

Amidst the sighs and moans and grunts, Yibo thrust his hips up into Zhan’s and groaned into his mouth as he felt how hard Zhan had become.

”Fuck,” Zhan hissed. “Wait…” he pulled back.

”Wha...what?”

”I don't...have...the things…”

”Oh...umm...what things?”

”Yibo!” Zhan sat back with a look of surprise.

”I mean...I know condoms...right?” Yibo looked flustered.

”Yeah...and lube…,” Zhan shook his head with a chuckle.

”Oh...yeah...I knew that,” Yibo rubbed the back of his neck.

”Did you really?” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

”I mean yeah...it makes sense…,” Yibo blushed and cleared his throat.

”Uhuh,” Zhan suppressed another chuckle and tilted Yibo’s face up by his chin. “I hope you also know what goes where…”

”Zhan-ge!!!” Yibo covered his face, “Shut up! Of course I know…”

”Aww...sweetie...are you blushing?” Zhan teased as he peeled Yibo’s hands away from his face.

”Shut up,” Yibo growled and with one strong motion, flipped Zhan onto the couch and climbed on top of him, pinning him down. 

”Why don't you shut me up?” Zhan smirked. 

Without wasting another moment, Yibo grinded his hips down, eliciting a loud gasp from Zhan. He locked his teeth on Zhan’s neck and sucked roughly. 

”Ahh...Yibo…,” Zhan groaned. “I have a photoshoot tomorrow!!”

Yibo grunted and pulled back reluctantly. Zhan took advantage of the momentary release and slid out from underneath Yibo and pushed him down instead. He sat on top of Yibo and leaned forward biting down on his chest through the fabric of his shirt. 

His hand moved down and grabbed onto Yibo’s erect dick. He massaged it gently before slipping his hand into Yibo’s pants. He stroked it a few times before sliding his hand around his hips and groping Yibo’s taut ass.

Yibo’s breath hitched at the contact and he involuntarily rolled his hips up, allowing Zhan better access to his ass. Zhan kneaded Yibo’s groin more as he squeezed the other cheek.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo licked his lips. “I…I...”

”Can’t wait?” Zhan leaned down and licked Yibo’s lips. 

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded shakily.

”I want to make you feel so good, Bo-di. Wait till next time?” Zhan whispered and licked his way to Yibo’s ear.

”Hmm,” Yibo trembled more.

”Say you want me to make you feel good, sweetie…”

”I want...you to make me feel good.”

”Say you want to feel me inside you.

”Fuck,” Yibo shut his eyes tight at the images those words conjured and clutched Zhan’s shirt. “I want it, ge...I want you...inside me.”

”Good boy,” Zhan breathed heavily against Yibo’s ear. “I have another idea for now.”

”What?” Yibo asked desperately.

”Ever heard of the 69?”

”Huh?!” Yibo’s eyes opened wide. “Ye...yeah…”

”What do you say?” Zhan grinned nervously.

”Fuck yeah,” Yibo wrapped his legs around Zhan’s body and smirked.


	59. I've got you

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Yibooo...my entire body is sore...it’ll take days to recover from the concert!  
>    
>  Yibo: Take a nice hot shower, ge. I’ll massage you later.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Are you coming over tonight? Or should I come over?  
>    
>  Yibo: Either works  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’ll come over...my place is out of the way for you from your studio  
>    
>  Yibo: Xiao-laoshi is so kind. So thoughtful. Always taking care of me_ 🥰 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Oh, I’m going to take such good care of you tonight, baby  
>    
>  Yibo: Zhan-ge! _😳 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: It’s a good thing you’re a dancer...you’ll need that flexibility tonight _😉 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Zhan-ge! I’m at work...don’t...talk about it right now _🙉 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Ooo...that’s hot...I want to do it on set once at least…  
>    
>  Yibo: Wow...okay, that is hot to think about_ 🤤 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Here’s another hot thing to think about  
>    
>  Yibo: What?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Me deep inside you  
>    
>  Yibo: Fuck _

* * *

Zhan felt stupid. He had a giant sweatshirt on, a cap down low, a mask across his face, and was trying to be as discreet as possible as he browsed the store aisle looking for a pack of condoms and lube. 

_This is so embarrassing._ Zhan groaned inwardly. 

But when he finally found what he was looking for, all Zhan could think of was the image of Yibo, breathing heavily as he moaned Zhan’s name.

 _Tonight’s going to be our first...time. Together._ Zhan felt his entire body shiver.

He hurried to the counter and quickly paid for the items and walked out. He drove to Yibo’s apartment and made his way up to the top floor. Zhan knocked and waited, tapping his foot. He heard soft footsteps rushing to the door.

When Yibo opened the door, they stared at each other nervously for a few seconds.

”Hey,” Zhan adjusted his cap and removed his mask.

”Hi,” Yibo fidgeted with the door knob.

Zhan walked in and shut the door behind him as Yibo took a step back in. They stood facing each other, grinning stupidly. Zhan reached out for Yibo’s hand and intertwined their fingers. He pulled Yibo close and held his cheek with his other hand. Lightly, he placed a kiss on Yibo’s lips. 

Yibo’s body relaxed and he sighed into the kiss. They wrapped their arms around each other and melted. As their embrace deepened, so did their kiss. They poured all their emotions into the movements of their lips, exploring, tasting, expressing. 

”Did you have dinner?” Zhan murmured against his lips.

”Mmm...Han-ge took me to dinner after the taping. You?”

”Mmm...I had something at home...but I’m still hungry…”

”Oh...I have some take out left over from yesterday,” Yibo pulled back and pointed to the kitchen.

Zhan smirked as he tilted his to one side, raising an eyebrow at Yibo.

”What happ...oh…,” Yibo paused as he realized what Zhan meant.

”You’re so cute,” Zhan giggled and squeezed his cheeks. 

”I’m not cute! Yibo protested.

”You’re right,” Zhan’s voice dropped low as his hands dropped lower, further down Yibo’s chest. “You’re hot.”

”Oh yeah?” Yibo smirked as he grabbed Zhan by the hair and pulled his face closer.

”Especially when you dance,” Zhan sighed. “Every time I see you perform, I just want to pin you to the ground and…”

”And..?”

Zhan pushed Yibo further into the apartment. His eyes moved up and down Yibo’s body as he led him in backwards into the bedroom. Yibo watched expectantly as Zhan’s hands travelled around his chest down to his waist. He pulled on Yibo’s shirt and yanked it off the top of his head.

Zhan’s hands slid down Yibo’s chest once more and stopped at the hem of his pants. He grabbed the waistband and slowly pulled the pant down. He bent forward, lowering himself down Yibo’s body as he took the pants off. He caressed Yibo’s legs as he made his way back up, stopping at his hips.

Yibo watched as his dick turned hard with every inch Zhan touched. When Zhan stood up again, he stared at Yibo’s body, as if in awe of it. Yibo suddenly felt shy and reached out to take Zhan’s clothes off.

With a laugh, Zhan let Yibo slide his sweatshirt off, his pants off, his boxers down. As soon as they were fully naked, Zhan’s breath hitched. He gazed at Yibo affectionately. When Yibo smiled, Zhan leaned forward and took his lips in his. The kiss started slowly but soon turned into a heated, desperate need to taste each other inside out.

”Yibo…,” Zhan moaned as Yibo clawed his back in an attempt to pull him closer.

”Zhan-ge…”

Zhan moved his lips down Yibo’s neck, nibbling the soft skin along the way. He sucked on the spot where his neck met his collarbone. He bit down and sucked on it until it was raw and red. With every whimper Yibo let out, Zhan held him tighter and closer. 

Zhan held Yibo by the waist as he walked him towards the bed. Without breaking their kiss, Zhan lowered them onto the bed and climbed on top of Yibo. As he pressed his body down on Yibo, he groaned feeling the friction between their erections. 

Yibo grabbed Zhan’s ass and pressed him down harder on his dick. Zhan felt something primal in him when he felt them cling together, skin to skin, limb to limb, breath to breath. As their bodies grew damp and breaths became heavier, Zhan felt his entire body heat up with desire. He bit down on Yibo’s lips, bit his way down his chest, buried his face in his thighs, and licked his curving shaft. 

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo’s raspy voice called out to him. “Zhan-ge…”

”I’m right here, sweetie,” Zhan moved up slightly so he could caress Yibo’s cheek while his other hand stroked his erection. 

Yibo pulled him closer and wrapped his own hand around Zhan’s dick. He timed his motion with Zhan’s strokes and soon, Zhan could feel their energies rising. Just when he felt their pace increase to a frantic level, Zhan stopped.

”Shh,” Zhan murmured when Yibo whined. “I’ve got you.”

Zhan kissed Yibo’s chest and then licked his nipple. Encouraged by Yibo’s gasp, Zhan tugged on it gently with his teeth, troubling it until it was pink and erect. Zhan pinned Yibo down by his arms as he made his way to give the same attention to Yibo’s other nipple. 

He glanced down as he saw slight pre cum at the tip of Yibo’s dick. Smirking, he licked down to Yibo’s belly button. He licked around the soft skin and then dipped his tongue inside, biting the skin on his way back out. 

”Fuck…,” Yibo groaned and arched his body up. 

Zhan continued lower and kissed the inside of Yibo’s thighs as his hands went onto Yibo’s ass, kneading into the plump curves. Slowly, he moved his lips to the warm skin beneath Yibo’s dick and licked his balls. He nibbled on them and eventually, feeling Yibo tremble, took them in his mouth while rubbing his tongue under them like they were the tastiest dish in the world.

”Zhan-ge...that feels...so good…”

”It tastes good too,” Zhan smirked as Yibo’s entire face flushed.

Zhan focussed his attention on the tip of Yibo’s erection and licked the precum off in one teasing motion. His hands spread Yibo’s legs apart and propped them up, bending his knees.

Slowly, as one hand massaged Yibo’s thigh, Zhan slid his thumb down Yibo’s shaft, further down over his balls, and then onto the narrow pink slit that lay below. As soon as he made contact, Yibo’s entire body jerked up with a whimper.

”Hey…,” Zhan spoke gently, “It’s okay…”

Yibo nodded as his eyes stared at Zhan filled with want and a tinge of apprehension.

”We can stop whenever you want, sweetie,” Zhan kissed his thigh and knee softly.”

”No!” Yibo exclaimed abruptly.

”Hmm?” Zhan raised an eyebrow and then smirked. “Then say it…”

”Zhan-ge!”

”Say it!” Zhan growled and bit down on Yibo’s inner thigh.

”Ge...I…”

Zhan licked Yibo’s balls and nibbled on them roughly.

”Fuck...yes…”

Zhan breathed against Yibo’s skin and lowered his face and tongued the narrow pink slit once, twice, thrice.

”Fuck! Zhan-ge! I want you, Zhan-ge! I need you inside me!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, here it goes...first time writing proper M/M lemon. Sorry for any shortcomings!!


	60. You make me feel so loved

* * *

Zhan took in a deep breath as he fought the urge to take Yibo then and there. He spread Yibo’s legs wide, pushing his knees towards his chest. Initially, Yibo felt embarrassed and exposed and tried clenching his legs together but the moment Zhan’s lips enclosed his opening, his entire body flew open, craving more.

Zhan thumbed the skin and teased it apart, sliding his tongue in a little deeper each time. After several minutes of kissing, nibbling, licking all the while stroking Yibo’s still erect dick, Zhan got up and reached across Yibo to get the lube from the night stand.

Before he could go back down, Yibo grabbed him by the neck and pulled him down for a long wet kiss. Zhan smiled against Yibo’s lips and let him drown in the wetness. Zhan opened the bottle without leaving Yibo’s lips and squeezed out some of the liquid on his fingers.

He deepened the kiss as his hand made its way down once more. When he found the opening, Zhan slowly inserted one finger tip inside. Yibo’s breath hitched and Zhan pulled him closer. He let his finger massage the slit and moving his finger in and out, sliding it in deeper each time until he could feel the warmth inside Yibo.

Yibo moaned into Zhan’s mouth. Zhan hesitated a bit but then spurred on by Yibo’s nails that were digging into his back, inserted his finger completely inside. Both gasped at the sensation. Zhan imagined how the tightness would feel around his erection. The mere thought drove his finger inside Yibo once more.

”Ahh...gege…”

”How does that feel?” Zhan spoke in a low voice as his finger kept entering Yibo. "You okay?"

”Hmmm…”

In the next turn, Zhan brought a second finger up and twirled it into Yibo’s now loose opening. He pressed into the skin harder until it gave way and Zhan felt himself entering into the warmth once more.

Zhan’s fingers thrust deeper into Yibo and slowly, Zhan scissored them open, feeling Yibo opening up more and more each time, moist, warm, inviting. With a low moan, Zhan pushed in harder and when his eyes looked down, he held his breath as he saw his fingers emerging and disappearing into Yibo over and over again, imagining his erection there instead. 

”Fuck…,” Zhan muttered. “Fuck…”

Zhan put some more lube on his fingers and moved between Yibo’s legs. He gazed at the opening hungrily and took a bite of the skin around it and before Yibo could breathe in again, he inserted three fingers into him.

”Fuck!” Yibo yelled raspily. “Fuck...Zhan-ge!”

”Like that, huh?”

”Ye..yes...gege…”

Zhan smirked and inserted the three fingers again, spreading them inside him. When he was satisfied with the stretch, Zhan pulled one finger out and curved the two fingers still inside, searching.

He pushed them against Yibo’s walls, probing, prodding, hunting. He knew he had found the spot when Yibo let out a loud moan and clutched Zhan’s hair.

”Oh shit…,” Yibo muttered breathlessly, “Oh shit…”

Zhan adjusted the curve of his fingers and kept thrusting them in, ramming them into the spot that made Yibo groan and grunt. He leaned forward on Yibo’s body and put his weight down on his hand, thrusting it in harder, massaging and troubling the region over and over again. His other hand rested by Yibo’s side as he watched every twitch of his body, every bite of his lips, every arch of his back.

”Fuck, you’re so beautiful,” Zhan whispered.

He dipped down towards Yibo’s face as his hand dipped deeper into Yibo as well. 

”Yibo...I…,” Zhan shivered, feeling his self control weaken with every thrust, feeling Yibo open up to his fingers without any more resistance. 

”I want you inside me too, ge,” Yibo panted, throwing his head back each time Zhan’s fingers pressed against his prostate.

Zhan scrambled off Yibo and grabbed the packet of condoms. He pulled one out frantically and rolled it on, fumbling to get it on all the way to the top. Without wasting any more time, Zhan lowered himself down on Yibo, pushing Yibo’s legs back towards his chest. 

He tried his best to go slow as he lined himself up with Yibo and guided his dick into him. Zhan let out a long drawn out groan as he felt Yibo engulf him. He pushed him in, lowering himself further, making his way into the tightness. 

”Ahh...Yibo,” Zhan bit his lip as he pulled out a little and pushed in again. “Fuck…”

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo murmured as his eyes opened and he ran his fingers through Zhan’s hair, pulling him closer.

Zhan maintained his position until he felt Yibo relax around him. His lips merely a hair’s breadth away from Yibo’s, he lowered his hips again and slowly, let himself slide in completely. As soon as he felt himself completely inside Yibo, he dropped his forehead against his and let out a grunt.

Yibo bit his lip and his hands found their way down Zhan’s back, to his hips, groping them, holding them in place while Zhan caught his breath. Zhan looked up after a few seconds and smiled at Yibo breathlessly.

”Are you...is it…”

”I’m fine,” Yibo smiled and kissed Zhan.

”Good...because I don’t think I can hold back any longer,” Zhan growled and lifted his hips up. 

Zhan pushed Yibo’s legs up further, nearly folding him in half and leaned over him. He pulled out slowly and as he took Yibo’s lips in him once again, pushed into him all the way till the end.

”Ahhh,” Yibo threw his head back.

Zhan stretched Yibo’s legs to one side, trying to find his spot again. On the third try, Zhan knew he had found it once more. As he pulled and pushed into Yibo, Zhan felt his erection grow more. He rammed into Yibo harder every time he moaned his name. He crushed Yibo’s lips with his as he increased his pace. Yibo stretched his legs wider, allowing Zhan to penetrate him deeper. Zhan gasped at the intense sensation.

He clutched the sheets on either side of Yibo’s face as he grind down on Yibo, thrusting into him over and over again.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo moaned again and again. “Harder...faster gege...please…”

Zhan obliged willingly, his lips gliding down Yibo’s entire body, nibbling, biting, licking until they were both gasping for breath. When Zhan felt himself reaching the edge, he caught hold of Yibo’s erection and began stroking it vigorously, in time with himself.

”Ge...I’m going to…”

”Me too,” Zhan groaned as he quickened his pace both outside and inside Yibo.

”Kiss me,” Yibo pleaded breathlessly.

Zhan bent down and enveloped his lips and felt all the emotions rush through his body as the sensation rose up like a wave and carried them up with it. Within seconds, they felt the wave crash all around them.

With a loud gasp, both Zhan and Yibo shuddered and then fell limp. Zhan shivered as he felt himself coming inside Yibo in fits and spurts. He felt his entire soul leave his body and enter Yibo. Yibo felt his own cum spray all over his stomach between them and his body felt like it was floating away. He hugged Zhan closer in an attempt to keep himself grounded, as he felt fuller than he had ever felt before.

Seconds, maybe minutes, passed as they clung to each other long after their bodies had gone limp. Eventually, Zhan pulled out and took the condom off and tied it carefully. His dazed state was not the only thing that made the task difficult. The added restriction of Yibo not letting go of him completely, made it doubly tricky.

Zhan grinned and shook his head as Yibo pulled him back as soon as he had set the condom aside. He let himself be pulled into the embrace once more and settled in the warm and sweaty hug.

”Bo-di?” Zhan rested his chin on Yibo’s chest and his hand straightened Yibo’s messy hair.

”Hmm?” Yibo hummed, his eyes still closed, his hands lazily stroking Zhan’s back.

”I love you…,” Zhan planted a kiss on his chest.

”I love you too, ge,” Yibo opened his eyes and smiled at Zhan.

Zhan scuttled up until they were face to face. 

”How do you feel? Does it hurt? Did it feel good?”

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo chuckled and kissed his nose. “I’m fine. It felt so fucking good. I didn't think...I didn't know it could feel so good,” Yibo blushed.

”Really?” Zhan looked at him excited and expectant as if waiting to be praised.

”Yes,” Yibo shuffled and moved Zhan beside him until they were plastered together face to face on their sides. “It felt...amazing. You felt amazing.”

”And are you...hurting?”

”It hurt a little bit initially, but you prepared me well…,” Yibo grinned. “And I’m pretty flexible so I should be fine,” Yibo winked.

”That you are,” Zhan grinned back and wrapped his arms around Yibo, kissing him lazily.

”How are you so good...at all of that?” Yibo pulled back suddenly, raising an eyebrow.

”What can I say?” Zhan smirked as he lay on his back.

”Zhan-ge!?” Yibo propped himself on one elbow and glared at Zhan. “Tell me! Have you...done this before?”

Zhan smirked at Yibo with a wink but when he saw his face fall into one of sadness and hurt, he sat up hurriedly.

”No...No...I was just kidding around. Of course I haven't, sweetie...I would never lie to you,” Zhan spoke quickly and pulled Yibo closer, caressing his cheek.

”Hmm,” Yibo turned away a little, suddenly feeling very cold. 

”Here,” Zhan pulled the blanket all around them and pulled Yibo closer to his chest as he lay back down. “I...looked it up online,” Zhan whispered finally.

”What?” Yibo asked.

”I did some...online research…,” Zhan spoke louder this time.

”Oh!” Yibo exclaimed and looked up at a visibly embarrassed Zhan. “Did you watch gay porn?”

”Only for research purposes,” Zhan turned onto his other side and hid his face in the pillow. “And it wasn’t really helpful so I read some articles!”

”Wow,” Yibo spooned him and looked over his shoulder. “You’re a quick learner, gege.” He teased and kissed Zhan’s neck.

”Stop making fun of me!”

”I’m not,” Yibo chuckled. “It makes me feel nice…”

”Really?” Zhan turned over and cocked his head at Yibo.

”Yeah, it shows you cared. And you made me feel so good and so...loved.”

”You _are_ loved. So very much.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, okay...it's not the best or the most romantic or the sexiest...but it's their first time and mine too :P First times are always a little here and there and everywhere!! :P


	61. It pays to be brave

* * *

Zhan woke up to Yibo clinging to his body. He adjusted himself to a more comfortable position, making sure to not lose contact with Yibo. He wrapped them up in the blanket tighter and sighed with a smile.

_It pays to be brave. Now, I have the love of my life in my arms. I’m going to take care of him for the rest of his life._ Zhan felt his heart flutter at the thought. _One day, I want to give him everything he deserves. He deserves the world._

__

He felt Yibo stir in his arms and patted his back lovingly. When Yibo opened his eyes, he smiled at him and played with his hair.

__

”Hey you…,” Zhan whispered.

__

”Hmm,” Yibo smiled softly. 

__

”How are you feeling?”

__

”Sore,” Yibo grinned and hid his face in Zhan’s chest, “but good.”

__

”You need a long hot shower...and I can massage you. Sorry if I was too rough.”

__

”Shut up,” Yibo kissed his chest, “I liked it.”

__

”So...what do you have today?”

__

”Thankfully, my schedule is lighter today. But I have to be at the shoot by noon.”

__

”It’s already 10...,”

__

”What?!” Yibo jerked up. “Shit, I need to get ready.”

__

Yibo sat up quickly but then paused with a groan. He got off the bed slowly and Zhan noticed he was walking stiffly with a slight limp.

__

”Oh my god, Yibo! Are you okay?”

__

”What do you think?” Yibo smirked. “You rammed into me like a truck last night!”

__

”Shit shit. I’m so sorry sweetie…,” Zhan got out of bed and held his lower back. “Here...let me help.”

__

”If only the world knew that their innocent sweet Zhan bunny was such a monster.”

__

”Yibo!” Zhan blushed.

__

”But they won’t. Only I get to see this side of Zhan-ge!”

__

”Only you,” Zhan grinned and kissed Yibo.

__

They made their way to the bathroom and Zhan helped Yibo undress and hop into the shower.

__

”I want gege to give me a bath,” Yibo pouted playfully.

__

”Anything didi wants, gege will do,” Zhan bowed and spoke solemnly.

__

He removed his clothes and walked in and turned the shower on. Adjusting the temperature, he glanced at Yibo raising an eyebrow.

__

”Warmer…,” Yibo responded and then nodded after Zhan adjusted the water some more.

__

”Come here,” Zhan squeezed some shampoo onto his palm and spoke gently.

__

Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist as Zhan reached up and began lathering the shampoo into his hair. Yibo closed his eyes and hummed as Zhan massaged his scalp. He played with Zhan’s buttcheeks as Zhan pulled them under the water once more and washed the shampoo off.

__

"Careful, Yibo,” Zhan smirked, wiping any remnants of the shampoo from his face. “Don't start something you can't finish right now.”

__

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo giggled and let Zhan pull him in for a kiss.

__

Zhan reached out for the soap and lathered it in his hands next. He spread the foam all over Yibo’s body, marvelling at every curve of his skin, every sharp angle of his toned muscles.

__

When he was done massaging every inch of Yibo’s body, he faced him once more. Yibo leaned forward and took Zhan’s lips in his. Soon, their bodies were wrapped around each other, limbs entangles, hands touching every part. Yibo walked Zhan back until he pinned him against the wall and rubbed their bodies together, the soap easing the friction and somehow heightening the sensation of skin against skin.

__

They kissed for several minutes until Zhan pulled back a little, breathless.

__

”Don’t you have to be at work?”

__

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and sighed.

__

Zhan walked him back under the water, smiling, and washed him clean. After a few more minutes of kissing, Zhan shut the water off and dried Yibo down. Yibo wrapped the towel around his waist and stepped out of the shower.

__

”I’ll take a quick shower too while you get ready.”

__

Yibo nodded and headed out. When Zhan was done, he stepped out still naked, drying his hair with the towel.

__

”Are you trying to seduce me, ge,” Yibo’s mouth watered as he eyed Zhan’s damp body.

__

”Maybe…,” Zhan winked.

__

”You’re going to be the death of me.”

__

”Shut up! I gotta go too now. Text me when you reach.”

__

”Hmm,” Yibo’s entire face lit up. “I will.”

__

* * *

__

> __
> 
> _Zhan-ge: How are you feeling now, sweetie?  
>    
>  Yibo: Better. Still a little sore but not as much as this morning.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Crap…I’m so sorry, didi!  
>    
>  Yibo: Stop apologizing, ge! Are you really sorry?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: No, not really _😋 _  
>   
>  Yibo: I knew it! _😬 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: _😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: What are you doing?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Actually, I have a meeting with Wajijiwa. Like an assessment of 2018 and planning for 2019.  
>    
>  Yibo: Oh, how do you feel about that?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Not too bad. It is what it is. Plus all the boys will be there. And no matter the conflicts, we are still united. It hasn't been able to divide us. Everyone knows it’s not personal.  
>    
>  Yibo: That’s good. So what does your 2019 look like?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: One last schedule for Jade Dynasty, this time with the whole main cast. A lot more auditions but that’s it.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Apart from the Untamed and Joy of life releasing and the movie, I have no concrete things lined up.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: And since everyone is focusing on their solo careers, even X-Nine is going to take a backseat.  
>    
>  Yibo: Don't worry, ge. After the Untamed, your career is going to go to the next level. I can just feel it.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Thanks, didi. Oh, I forgot...there is one more important thing in my 2019….  
>    
>  Yibo: What?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: You. _
> 
> __

_  
_

Yibo felt a blush invade his face and he sank further in his chair, as he waited for the rest of his TTXS brothers to get ready.

__

> __
> 
> _Yibo: Yeah?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yeah…  
>    
>  Yibo: I love you, Zhan-ge _💘 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: I love you more_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Not possible!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Hey! You can't use my line on me!  
>    
>  Yibo:_ 😋 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Okay, ge. I have to go now. Good luck with your meeting! _
> 
> __

__  


Yibo walked onto set and was quickly introduced to the guests. He had been intrigued when he was told that they were opera singers. Yibo had always loved musicals and he was excited to meet them.

__

”Hi, I’m Ayunga...nice to meet you,” the tall dashing man extended his hand and bowed to Yibo.

__

”Hello…,” Yibo bowed with a smile. 

__

”And I’m Zheng Yunlong,” a leaner man stood beside him and bowed.

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After Our Song, I became a fan of Ayunga and discovered his CP with his best friend, Zheng Yunlong. They appeared on TTXS in December 2018 although I wasn’t able to find the entire episode. In the short snippet I found, I couldn't see Yibo but seeing as he was a host on the show at the time, for the sake of this fic I am going to pretend like he was there and met them. I’m excited about bringing these two characters because I really want to bring them in later once Ayunga and Xiao Zhan meet and become friends too!
> 
> https://www.ondemandchina.com/zh-Hans/watch/day-day-up/ep-20181223  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwo3Sk8KV7g


	62. How did I get so lucky

* * *

As the episode progressed, Yibo couldn't help but notice the interactions between Ayunga and Yunlong in particular. Something in the way they stood together, finished each other’s sentences, looked at each other, reminded Yibo of him and Zhan.

He watched as throughout the shoot, they behaved as if they were the only two people there even when they were on opposite sides of the set, always glancing at each other and smiling.

The more he observed, the more convinced he felt that there was more to their story. He was enamored by the way their chemistry energized everyone around them and made them glow as they spoke about each other, shared anecdotes from their college days. 

They especially came alive when they performed together. Even when there was a third person on stage with them, it didn't matter. Their chemistry shone through as their voices blended together perfectly.

> _Yibo: You won't believe what happened on set today, ge!  
>    
>  Yibo: I think two of today’s guests are...together.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: So? What’s the big deal?  
>    
>  Yibo: They’re two...men. Ayunga and Zheng Yunlong.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Oh! I’ve heard of them. They’re fantastic singers!!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Wow...looks like there are more same sex couples in this industry than I thought.  
>    
>  Yibo: Yeah...pity we live in a society where none of us can be open about our relationships.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: You never know, Bo-di...one day, maybe one day. _

Yibo sighed as his make-up artist wiped his face. He looked at himself in the mirror and bit his inner cheek. 

_One day._

* * *

”So...I’ve heard you’re a great dancer, Yibo!” Ayunga smiled as they all stood around saying their goodbyes.

”He’s fantastic!” Wang Han beamed and patted Yibo’s back.

”Ayunga dances as well,” Yunlong smiled, “He was going to be a dancer before his injury!” He gushed.

”No no,” Ayunga blushed and nudged Yunlong. “I wasn't that good...but I did love dancing.”

Yibo couldn't help but smile at them as they continued praising him and each other. When everyone dispersed, Yibo waited around for his car to arrive.

”They were cute, weren’t they?” Qian Feng showed up out of nowhere.

”Who?”

”Ayunga and Yunlong. I think there’s something there,” he grinned.

”Oh,” Yibo replied stunned. “I...I didn't notice…”

”Really? It was so obvious. Anyway...how’s your someone doing?” He winked.

”Feng-ge! There’s no one. Stop teasing!”

Just then, Yibo’s phone pinged and he pulled it out hurriedly. Seeing the smile that lit up his face, Qian Feng smirked.

”If you say so!” He laughed and punched Yibo’s arm and walked away.

> _Yixuan-ge: YIBO!!!  
>    
>  Yibo: Yixuan-ge!?!? Oh my god...how are you!? What’s up!?  
>    
>  Yixuan-ge: It’s been so long, didi!!!  
>    
>  Yixuan-ge: My birthday, that’s what’s up! Wenhan and I are both in town and we are all going to celebrate together! No excuses!  
>    
>  Yibo: Oh, shit. Of course, ge. I was just thinking about you all the other day.  
>    
>  Yixuan-ge: And what prompted you to remember us mere mortals?  
>    
>  Yibo: Shut up! I was hanging out with some people who are also in a band...X-Nine...do you know them? Just reminded me of our days…  
>    
>  Yixuan-ge: Oh yeah, heard of them. How did the reclusive Wang Yibo end up hanging out with them? Are they coming on your show?  
>    
>  Yibo: Just...a common friend...they were celebrating their concert and invited me along.  
>    
>  Yixuan-ge: Hmm...anyway...so you’re coming?  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes!  
>    
>  Yixuan-ge: I might be inviting a few more people...you can bring someone along too...maybe that ‘common friend’ _😉 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Why are you winking? _😑 _  
>   
>  Yixuan-ge: Oh, nothing. Just curious to see who this person is who was able to get you to go out with people you don't know as well... _

Yibo bit his lips and paused his typing. He debated, typed, deleted, and debated some more before finally, with a long exhale, made up his mind.

> _Yibo: Actually...it is someone special…  
>    
>  Yixuan-ge: Oh?  
>    
>  Yibo: And I can't wait for you all to meet him. _

Yibo took another long deep breath as he read and reread the message. A smile began spreading across his face and he felt a certain lightness as his heart soared. Suddenly, a thought crossed his mind and his smile vanished.

_Oh shit. I didn't even ask Zhan-ge before telling him. I hope he’s okay with it. I don't even know if he can make it! Stupid, Yibo!_

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge! I think I did something stupid!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Hey...what happened? Are you okay?  
>    
>  Yibo: Okay, so...it’s Yixuan-ge’s birthday in a few days and he invited me over. Can you come?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yixuan...you’re Uniq leader?  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes! And it’s on the 11th….can you?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I think so _😄 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Good...also...here’s the stupid part...I kinda got carried away and told him I am bringing someone special…  
>    
>  Yibo: Please don't be mad...I should have asked you first...I’m sorry!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yibo  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: If you were here right now, I would kiss you till we ran out of breath  
>    
>  Yibo: You’re not mad?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Why would I be mad? These are your friends...just like my band members...they’re like your family...and I can't wait to meet them!  
>    
>  Yibo: Oh okay...wow...thank god_ 😅 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: I love you, Bo-di...so much  
>    
>  Yibo: Love you too, ge  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: So when am I seeing you next?  
>    
>  Yibo: I have to travel for some ad shoots next few days but I’ll be back on the 10th.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Hmm...okay...I’ll see you then. _

Yibo smiled ecstatically as he got into his car. 

_Slowly but surely, things are falling into place. We are becoming a part of every aspect of each other’s life. How did I get so lucky? How the hell did I get so damn lucky._


	63. We need proof

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the comments and love! Shout out to some of my regulars! discrepancy, ShadowsofReason, Pallyprincess, Zaire121, Amabilissima, fujoshi_hime, Uwaraa, katkootable, and DarkLady1969. Of course so grateful for each and everyone who reads and leaves comments. It keeps me going!!

* * *

”I can't wait for you to meet them, ge!” Yibo exclaimed as they made their way up in the elevator.

”I can't wait to meet them too, didi,” Zhan smiled affectionately.

”Can I introduce you as my boyfriend…”

”If you trust everyone in the room.”

”He did say he was inviting more people...maybe once everyone has left. Although I think he already knows because of my message.”

They made their way to the apartment and Yibo knocked twice. Soon, the door flung open and a very cheery face greeted them.

”Wang Yibo!!!” A loud and grinning Yixuan pulled Yibo into an embrace.

”Yiboooo!” Another person showed up from behind and wrapped himself around them. 

”Ge! Wenhan!” Yibo’s muffled voice protested. “I can't breathe!”

Zhan rolled his lips in an attempt to control his laughter as he watched the affectionate but hilarious scene unfold. After several seconds passed, they finally let Yibo go and a very flustered Yibo smoothed his hair and adjusted his clothes.

”You guys!” Yibo grunted. “What the hell!”

”Aww! It’s been so long, baby!” Yixuan pulled his cheeks and smirked.

A sudden chuckle interrupted them and everyone turned to see a red Zhan covering his mouth, trying his best to rein in his laughter.

”So this must be your _special_ someone,” Wenhan eyed him with a raised eyebrow and stepped towards him.

Zhan turned even redder but managed to gather himself and extend his hand.

”Hi...I’m Xiao Zhan,” he smiled sweetly.

”Xiao Zhan,” Wenhan looked at him seriously, not taking his hand. “Do you know...before you charmed our Wang Yibo...I was his one true love?”

Zhan felt his breath hitch and he did his best to maintain his smile.

”We were soulmates,” Wenhan came closer with a frown. 

A slight anger began rising in Zhan as he brought his hand back down and stared back at Wenhan. Before he could choose his next words carefully, a wide grin broke through Wenhan’s face.

”’I’m kidding, bro!!” He threw an arm around Zhan’s shoulder. “It’s so nice to meet you! Kudos to you for tolerating this fucking brat!”

”Oh,” Zhan blinked a few times. “Tha...thanks?”

”Shut up, Wenhan,” Yibo smacked his arm away and stood beside Zhan. 

”Oooo...possessive,” Wenhan smirked.

”Alright...alright...enough joking around...come inside you two,” Yixuan smiled and opened the door wide.

As Zhan followed them in, Yixuan stepped beside him.

”It’s nice to meet you, Xiao Zhan. Really happy you could join us!”

* * *

As the evening progressed, Zhan slowly began feeling comfortable around everyone. He watched in amusement as Yibo’s band members fussed over him, teased him, coddled him. Pretty soon, Yibo was smiling and joking around as well.

_This is such a different side of him. I can almost see what he must have been like as a young teen, living and growing up with these boys._

Intermittently, Zhan felt Yibo glance at him. The entire night, he sat beside him and Zhan found that comforting since he didn't know anyone there. Eventually, people started trickling away and by the time it was 11 pm, only Yixuan, Wenhan, Yibo and him remained.

”So,” Yixuan leaned back against the couch and turned to Zhan, “how did this happen?”

”Uhh,” Zhan blushed, “we…”

”We worked together on a drama...it’s going to be out next summer,” Yibo replied casually.

”And...what is this…,” Yixuan gestured to the two of them.

”He’s my boyfriend,” Yibo spoke seriously and intertwined his fingers with Zhan’s that were fidgeting with the sofa nervously.

”Stop sounding like his dad!” Wenhan chuckled.

”Someone’s gotta do it!” Yixuam sat up. “No offense, Xiao Zhan. I just...want to make sure you guys have thought this through.”

”None taken,” Zhan smiled, tightening his grip on Yibo’s hand. “It’s nice to know you guys have Yibo’s back.”

”Have you...thought about what would happen if this gets out?”

”It won’t,” Yibo replied before Zhan could.

”Will you let him talk!?” Yixuan shook his head.

”It’s okay,” Zhan nudged Yibo before facing Yixuan again. “It’s going to be difficult, we know...but we’ll figure it out as we go. I have friends who are also in same sex relationships. As long as it stays within our trusted circle, we’ll be fine. Most people within the industry are accepting and understanding...it’s just our...laws.”

”Hmm,” Yixuan nodded. “I’m so happy for you two, but I can't help but worry. This is our baby, after all!”

”’I’m not a baby!” Yibo pouted. 

”Of course, you’re not,” Zhan pulled Yibo’s cheek teasingly.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo pulled away and smacked Zhan’s arm.

”Domestic violence!!” Wenhan gasped mockingly and widened his eyes.

Zhan smacked Yibo back, laughing and the two devolved into a fighting match. 

”Okay, okay. I give up, didi!!” Zhan raised his arms in surrender.

”Good,” Yibo held onto Zhan’s hand and sat back satisfied.

The conversation flowed for the rest of the night and Zhan couldn't help but feel giddy as he heard stories from Yibo’s childhood. Each time Yibo felt embarrassed, Zhan squeezed his hand, planted a kiss on his shoulder, pressed their legs closer. 

_I already feel like I know him a little better now. I feel like an even bigger part of his world now._ Zhan mused. _I could just go on listening to these stories._

He enjoyed himself as he heard about how scared Yibo would get when they played pranks on him, about how he would sleep in onesies, about how he would try and act cute when he wanted something, about how he always needed to maintain some point of contact when sleeping. 

Zhan giggled as Wenhan told him how every interviewer would call him pretty and every female anchor would hit on him and how he has fake kissed so many boys on camera. Zhan gave Yibo a frown on hearing that.

”It was all fake, ge!” Yibo’s eyes widened. “Just for the cameras.”

”Uhuh,” Zhan let go of his hand and reached for his beer. “Sure…”

”I’m going to kill you,” Yibo glared at Wenhan.

”Tell me more,” Zhan’s eyes crinkled into half moons as he hung onto every word the two spoke.

Just then, Yixuan’s phone rang and interrupted Zhan. 

”It’s Sungjoo and Seungyeon!!”

As soon as he answered the call, two shrieking voices blared through the phone. 

”Ayyaaaa!!! Yixuannnnn...happy birthday, bro!!”

”Thanks guys! Guess who’s here!?” He turned the camera towards Wenhan.

”Hiiiii,” the voices screamed. 

”Aaaand,” Yixuan continued moving the camera to Yibo.

”Oh my gaawddd...it’s Yibo baby!” Sungjoo shrieked.

”Hi!” Yibo chuckled and sat forward, waving at them.

”Ooo...who’s the hunk beside him?” Seungyeon exclaimed.

”That’s Xiao Zhan,” Wenhan laughed from behind the camera. “Yibo’s...friend?” He raised an eyebrow at Yibo, leaving it to him to correct him.

”Ooo...any chance you’re single, _Xiao Zhan_?” Seungyeon giggled as he spoke in broken Chinese.

”Uhh…,” Zhan laughed nervously, embarrassed at the attention.

”Back off,” Yibo snapped, although still grinning. “He’s taken.”

”All the cute ones are,’ Seungyeon pouted. “Who’s the lucky girl?”

”The prettiest one of them all,” Wenhan cooed. “Our very own Wang Yibo!”

”Whaaa…,” the voices on the phone gasped. “You’re shitting, right?!!”

”I’m not a girl!” Yibo scowled.

”My baby is all grown up,” Sungjoo clapped his hands and squealed.

”I don't buy it. No way Yibo could snag...that,” he eyed Zhan.

”What is that supposed to mean?” Yibo’s scowl deepened.

”I mean you’re handsome Yibo but...you don't got no real game, honey. And that man right there...is a whole meal,” Seungyeon shrugged and winked at Zhan.

Zhan coughed and shuffled on the sofa, feeling his entire face heat up.

”That he is,” Yibo smirked. “And he’s my boyfriend,” he wrapped his arm around Zhan and pulled him closer.

”Why so quiet, Xiao Zhan?” Sungjoo spoke.

”Uhh...no...I don't know what to say...umm...hi?”

”He’s so cute,” Seungyeon squealed again.

”Umm...thanks,” Zhan stuttered.

”Are you really dating our Yibo?”

”Why don't you believe me!?” Yibo exclaimed.

”We need proof,” Seungyeon shook his head.

”And what would it take to convince you?”

For a second, Sungjoo and Seungyeon looked at each other and then with a wide smirk, leaned closer to their camera.

”Kiss!!” They yelled in unison.

Zhan nearly choked on his drink.

”Yes!” Yixuan and Wenhan joined in. “Kiss! Kiss!”

”What…,” Zhan coughed and looked away.

Before Zhan could say anything else, he felt a hand reach out and grab him by the hair and in the blink of an eye, a set of lips enveloped his gently. He felt warm moist lips caress his, kissing him deeply and longingly. Zhan melted into it when he felt Yibo smiled against his lips and pull him closer. Zhan held Yibo's other hand and rubbed the back of his knuckles softly with his thumb.

They broke the kiss when whistles and hoots erupted all around them. Yibo pulled back but didn't take his eyes off the now dazed Zhan. He smiled and grazed Zhan’s cheek with his fingers as he rested his forehead against his. Zhan forgot all about where they were, who they were with, and what was going on around them. The noises faded into the background and all he heard was Wang Yibo’s loving voice.

”I love you, Xiao Zhan.”


	64. You're talking like a detective

* * *

Zhan felt heady and high when he got into bed that night. After Yibo had dropped him off on his bike, they had stayed there, hugging and swaying in the wind. Zhan had let himself throw all caution into that same wind, emboldened by the dark emptiness of the night.

He kissed Yibo with all his might, pouring all his endless emotions into the kiss. He held Yibo close and didn't let go until it was the only option he had left if he wanted to keep breathing.

”What was that for?” A dazed Yibo caught his own breath.

”I love you,” Zhan murmured.

”I love you too.”

”I’m so happy...this feels more real now...like it’s not just a dream...like it won't just vanish when I wake up tomorrow.”

”This...us...it’s all real, Xiao Zhan,” Yibo spoke earnestly.

”Mmm,” Zhan hugged Yibo again. “I know that now.”

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Bo-di! Shijie, Zhoucheng and I will be going out today. Are you sure you can’t make it?  
>    
>  Yibo: Sorry, ge. The December holiday season is crazy for me.  
>    
>  Yibo: We’re knee deep in rehearsals and shootings for the holiday specials and new years event  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Ah, my hardworking Yibo!  
>    
>  Yibo: Just wait and watch, Zhan-ge. Next holiday season, you’ll be ten times busier than me! _

Zhan shook his head with a smile and pocketed his phone. He wrapped his scarf around tighter and put his gloves on before heading out. Once outside the building, he saw the car waiting for him outside. As soon as he stepped out, the window rolled down and two eager faces poked through.

”Xian-Xian!!” Xuan Lu’s gentle face gleamed with excitement as she waved at him.

”Let’s go! I’m so excited!” Zhoucheng’s face popped out above hers.

”I’m excited too, A-Cheng!” Zhan smiled as he got in beside the visibly thrilled boy.

”It’s going to be on heck of a day!” Zhoucheng clapped his hands together. “First the Naruto exhibit…”

”Then lunch at my favorite place,” Xuan Lu continued, “and some shopping!”

”I’m so glad we are doing this,” Zhan buckled in with a satisfied sigh. “I missed you all!”

The rest of the car ride was filled with laughter and chatter as the three on screen siblings caught up on each other’s lives. As the day progressed, they made their way through the various installations and booths, clicking a never ending stream of photos and selfies.

”I need to go to the washroom,” Zhoucheng excused himself as they finally took a seat on a long bench in the garden outside the restaurant for lunch.

”So,” Xuan Lu immediately turned to Zhan once Zhoucheng was out of sight, “what else is new with you?”

”Nothing else, we’ve covered everything!” Zhan gazed at the scenery.

”Don't lie to me,” Xuan Lu pinched Zhan who was startled out of his serenity.

”Oww! Shijiee!!” Zhan pouted and rubbed the pinched spot. “I am not lying….”

”Are you dating someone?” Xuan Lu interrupted him.

”Huh?” Zhan’s eyes widened. “Why would you ask…”

”I noticed something on your birthday…,” she interrupted yet again.

”Huh?” Zhan’s eyes widened more.

”You and Yibo….seemed close…,” Xuan Lu smiled gently.

”Shijie!” Zhan exclaimed. “Of course we are close, we have been since shooting. Everyone knows that.”

”It took him one second to find the knife in your kitchen.”

”So?”

”Clearly he had been there before,” Xuan Lu raised an eyebrow, “and not just visited your apartment but entered your kitchen, taken things in and out….he knew what was where,...not normal for just a regular guest, wouldn't you say so, Xian-xian?” Xuan Lu winked.

”Wow,” Zhan gaped at her. “You’re talking like a detective.”

”How was my sleuthing?”

”Pretty good. Yeah, he’s been over. Of course he makes himself at home. He is my friend...but why would you assume I am dating,” Zhan rolled his eyes.

”That’s a sister’s instinct,” her voice softened and she placed a hand on Zhan’s hand.

Before Zhan could respond, Zhoucheng had returned and they spent the next two hours ordering everything on the menu and hogging it all down.

”Is that a skating rink!?” Zhoucheng exclaimed. “I’ve never played on one before!”

”Really?” Zhan eyed the boy before grabbing him by the wrist. “Come on, A-Cheng. You’re going to really enjoy it”

After half an hour of playing around on the rink, Zhan sat by the side and watched Zhoucheng and Xuan Lu have fun. 

_I miss Yibo._ Zhan sighed.

> _Zhan-ge: How’s it going, didi? I miss you.  
>    
>  Yibo: Tired. But in a few more hours, I can go home and sleep. This rehearsal was a grueling one. How are you guys doing?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: We had so much fun at the Naruto exhibit.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: And then we passed by a skating rink and A-Cheng had never been to one before, so I took him on it. He’s having so much fun. Wait, I’ll send you some pics! _

Yibo frowned. He swiped between the photos repeatedly, he zoomed in and out, he eyed every pixel on them. And he frowned deeper. 

_Why do they have to share one sled?! Zhoucheng is a grown up boy._

> _Zhan-ge: Doesn’t he look so cute? He’s so happy...like a little baby! It was his first time on the sled!_ 😂😂🤩🤩 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Wish you were here, sweetie... _

_I wish I was there too._ Yibo’s frown softened.

> _Zhan-ge: Now they’re planning an early Christmas celebration at my place in a few days  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Shijie is turning this into a mini reunion. She’s trying to wrangle the rest of the gang together...the ones who don’t have a holiday work schedule like me haha!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Looks like it’s me, Zhoucheng, Xuan Lu, and Yubin as of now…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I don't want to pressure you...I know you have a crazy few days coming up_😘 

Yibo zoomed in each one of the photos Zhan had sent him and frowned once more. His mind went back to Yubin wrapping his arms around Zhan’s waist during an on set interview. His frown deepened.

> _Yibo: I’ll be there, ge._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some Yunmeng trio cuteness on their day out - 
> 
> https://b2utyfulbabyelf.tumblr.com/post/182241008130/the-twin-heroes-of-yunmeng-jiang-on-ice  
> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EM07IwjXYAEtKlx.jpg  
> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dxfhl8LXQAAjLxf.jpg


	65. Early christmas

* * *

"Haikuan! You made it too! It's so good to see you!"

"Hello!" Haikuan smiled serenly and followed Zhan in. "Looks like everyone's here!"

He went around the room, bowing and shaking hands and bumping fists with Xuan Lu, Zhoucheng, Yubin, and finally, Zhu Zanjin. Zhan watched them carefully from the corner of his eye. He smirked inwardly when he noticed the slight blush on Zanjin's face. 

"Not everyone yet," Xuan Lu spoke, "... hopefully Yibo can join us too. Right A-Xian?"

"Hopefully," Zhan replied. "But he's crazy busy so maybe not."

"So how can we help?" Xuan Lu stepped into the kitchen. 

"I've ordered half the things and the chicken and pie and noodles are almost done. I've got ingredients waiting for your famous soup," he grinned excitedly.

"Of course you do," Xuan Lu shook her head with a smile. 

"I can help!" Zhoucheng raised his hand.

"I'm going to get some alcohol," Zhan put on a jacket. "Totally forgot about that."

"I'll come along," Yubin walked to the door.

* * *

Xuan Lu was busy making the soup when the doorbell rang. 

"Must be Zhan and Yubin," Zan Jin called out. "I'll get it!"

When he opened the door, he found a tired and exhausted Yibo instead.

"Yibo? You made it!"

"Hi," Yibo bowed politely. 

"Come, come. You look exhausted."

Yibo followed him in and greeted everyone, his smile slowly growing wider. His eyes scanned the room and on not finding Zhan, he walked towards the kitchen. 

"Zhan has gone out to buy some alcohol. He and Yubin should be back any minute now….I think ...they've been gone for almost thirty minutes."

"Oh," Yibo raised an eyebrow but did his best to school his face.

Just then, they heard rowdy laughter in the hallway and soon, the door flew open and two giggling figures walked in, barely able to walk. 

"Shut up!" Zhan cackled at Yubin, "You did not really do that!!"

"I swear to god, Zhan-ge! I'm not lying. I have photos...before I knew it I was topless stripping for total strangers!!"

"Oh my...Yubin! I need to see these photos. That is wild!"

"Zhan-ge," Yibo cleared his throat and walked towards the two.

"Yibo!!" Zhan exclaimed as he let the boy help him carry the bags and place them on the table. "You made it!"

Zhan beamed from ear to ear. He held back from hugging Yibo but allowed himself to entwine their arms and nudge him playfully, prompting Yibo to finally smile. 

"Yeah...but I need to use your washroom, ge. I came straight from work and now I really need to pee!"

Zhan shook his head and chuckled. His mind however didn't want to miss this opportunity and he decided to lead the way.

"Come with me...I need to...clean up...I dirtied this shirt while cooking," he managed to make an excuse. 

They walked into Zhan's room and as soon they were out of everyone's sight, Zhan turned to Yibo and pulled him in for a tight hug.

"I'm so happy you came. You liked tired, sweetie. You need rest."

"I wanted to come, ge," Yibo pushed aside a strand of hair from Zhan's forehead and leaned forward and kissed him. 

"Yibo! What if someone comes here," Zhan blushed and pulled back. 

"I don't care," Yibo pulled him in, roughly this time and pressed himself hard against him. 

He latched onto Zhan and dove into his mouth, desperate, impatient, passionate. Zhan felt his knees go weak and he leaned against Yibo for support. When they parted, Zhan took in a deep inhale to catch his breath. 

"Alright, let's go outside before they suspect anything."

"You should change your shirt or they will definitely suspect something," Yibo grinned as he ran his thumb across Zhan's wet lips. 

Zhan changed his clothes when Yibo went into the bathroom. Within minutes they joined the rest and soon the night devolved into a chaotic fun-filled night, with food and laughter everywhere. 

The alcohol flowed freely and three hours later, everyone was either tipsy, happy high or drunk. 

"Let's play a game!" A tipsy Yubin exclaimed all of a sudden. 

"Truth or Dare!" Zan Jin, who was very much drunk, declared. 

Half the room cheered and the other half shrugged non-committal. 

"Okay, let's spin the bottle. Host goes first!"

Zhan reached out and gave the empty beer bottle a whirl. It paused on Yubin who stood up enthusiastically. 

"Dare!"

"Show us proof of this crazy alcohol-induced stripshow of yours!"

"Better yet, live demonstration!" Xuan Lu egged him on. 

"Music please!" Yubin popped his collar with a smirk. 

As the music began, Yubin started rolling his body seductively, getting into the groove. Yibo rolled his eyes and occasionally stole glances at Zhan who was already giggling and clapping. 

"Go Yubin," everyone cheered as Yubin began rolling his shirt off and walking from chair to chair. 

"Ewww get off me!" Zhoucheng pushed him away with a laugh.

Yubin proceeded to Zan Jin and ran his hands all over his arms and hair and back as he sat on his lap and dipped back dramatically. Zhan and Yibo instinctively glanced at HaiKuan who had a strange expression on his face, half amused and half unimpressed. 

They looked at each other and smirked. Next, Yubin made his way to Zhan and took his entire shirt off. 

"Special treatment for the host!!"

"I'm good ….thank you!" Zhan waved him away. 

"You wanted this, " Yubin smirked. 

Yibo felt his face heat up as Yubin began walking circles around Zhan and then, standing behind his chair, ran his hands down him. He stepped around and leaned forward, placing his hands on either side on the armrests. 

"Yubin!?" Zhan covered his face with a shriek. "I believe you. I believe you. Enough now!"

Yubin laughed louder and only increased the pace of his movements. It was when he lifted Zhan's hand to his abs that something took over Yibo and he stood up violently yanking Yubins arm to free Zhan's hand. 

"He said enough!" Yibo snarled. 

Silence fell in the room and Xuan Lu hurriedly stopped the music. Awkwardness and shock could be seen on everyone's face. Yibo didn't seem fazed. He glared at Yubin who slowly put his shirt on and raised his arms up in surrender.

"Okay, dude. Chill. We were just fooling around!"

"Yibo…," Zhan stood up in the space between the two and placed a hand on his. "It's okay. We're all friends here."

"Are we?" Yibo muttered and turned his gaze at Zhan who flustered immediately. 

"Are we not?" Xuan Lu interrupted and Zhan thought he saw a smirk on her face. 

Yibo took a long look at Zhan who eyed him with a soft concerned face. He took a deep breath to calm himself and sat down.

_Don't overreact Yibo. You'll only make Zhan-ge embarrassed._

"Sorry," Yibo looked at Yubin and then Zhan. "I thought Zhan-ge was uncomfortable."

"No one's gonna do anything to your Zhan-ge," Yubin teased and sat back down as well. 

"Alright, let's keep going," Zhan passed the bottle to Yubin and managed a smile. 

When Yubin spun the bottle, Zhan adjusted his chair trying to be discreet as he slid closer to Yibo and gently intertwined their fingers under the table. His smile widened when he saw Yibo's face relax and his fingers tightening their grip on Zhan's. 

When it was Zhoucheng's turn he chose truth. 

"Okay," Zan Jin rubbed his hands together with a devilish grin. "Who would you date from among the untamed cast?"

"What?!?" Zhoucheng stuttered. 

"Come on! You have to answer."

"Oh ummm," he looked around the room nervously. 

"Be a sport, A-Cheng," Xuan Lu patted his back.

"Fi...fine! Zhan-ge!" Zhoucheng blurted and covered his face. 

Ooo's and ahhh's echoed everywhere and Zhan nearly choked as he felt Yibo tighten his grip painfully hard. 

"Don't mind...sorry, ge! It's just you're so caring and sweet and of course handsome," Zhoucheng rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed. "You would be a perfect boyfriend! Whoever your girlfriend will be, she'd be the luckiest girl in the world. " 

Zhan felt Yibo's hand leave his and somehow it felt worse than the painful death grip. 

"What do you say to that, Zhan-ge," Zan Jin giggled.

Zhan looked at Yibo who seemed to have a downcast look suddenly. 

"Uhh...thanks," Zhan grinned even more embarrassed than Zhoucheng. 

Next, it was Zhoucheng's turn to spin the bottle and it landed on Zhan. 

"Truth or dare, ge?"

"Umm...truth!"

"Are you single?"

"Nice one!" Xuan Lu clapped. 

"I have friends who I could set you up with if you are," Zan Jin added. 

"So... we're dying to know!" Zhoucheng rested his elbows on the table and looked at Zhan in anticipation. 

"Umm," Zhan laughed nervously. 

But one final glance at Yibo, who had sunk further into his chair and was staring at his phone, dejected and almost pained, made the decision for him. 

"No. I'm not single."


	66. The happiest I've ever been

* * *

For the second time that night, silence reigned. But it didn't last long.

"Wow!" 

"Who's the lucky girl?!"

"When did this happen?"

"You're a sneaky one, ge!"

Yibo's eyes widened. He turned his head slowly and saw a nervous smile on Zhan’s face as he looked around the table at the bewildered faces.

_What the…did he…is he going to…_ Yibo's mind faltered. 

“Come on, Zhan,” Haikuan smirked. “Out with it!”

Zhan’s hand slowly reached for Yibo’s under the table and held it gently. He discreetly raised an eyebrow at Yibo who still hadn't recovered from Zhan’s unexpected declaration. Zhan grinned and squeezed Yibo’s hand.

”Yibo, did you know about this?! Who is it?” Zan Jin prodded.

”I...I…,” Yibo was at a loss for words.

_Is he really going to tell them? Does he trust them as much as he trusts his band mates and I trust mine?_

”Actually,” Zhan cleared his throat. “He does know...he knows because…,” as Zhan said the words, he raised his hand that was holding Yibo’s and brought it to his lips and placed a soft kiss on the back of his palm, “... _he_ is the person I’m in a relationship with.”

And a third silence spread across the room. This time, it wasn't broken for a while, until Xuan Lu stood up and walked to them.

”I am so happy for you two!” She stood between them, an arm around each and exclaimed joyfully.

Eventually, the rest of them joined her in congratulating the two, some claimed that this was not a surprise while others were stunned to their core. Yibo leaned close to Zhan and whispered.

”Zhan-ge, are you sure about this...about them?”

”They’re our family too, Yibo,” Zhan smiled fondly as he gazed at them.

”We’ve told almost everyone we know...you’re sure you don't think it’s too soon?”

”I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. I want to tell the whole world but for now, I’ll settle for this. I want all my loved ones to know just how special and important you are to me.“

Yibo’s heart melted at his words and his entire face lit up. He placed a kiss on their hands that still held each other firmly and felt his entire body finally relax.

_I feel so stupid now for feeling insecure earlier._ Yibo chuckled and shook his head.

“Plus, I thought I should say something before you beat up Yubin,” Zhan whispered, leaning in.

”You’re right about that,” Yibo frowned.

”Alright, you two lovebirds,” Xuan Lu interrupted. “We want to know everything. Spill!”

“How did this start? Who made the first move?”

”It was so obvious!” Zan Jin replied. “They were so close during filming...and the flirting!”

”But who made the first move?”

Zhan looked away with a blush and bit his lips.

”Oh my god! Xian-Xian!? It was you?”

”Wow...well done, Zhan-ge.”

”I would’ve thought it was Yibo!”

”When did this start? Was it during filming?” Haikuan inquired with a sincere smile.

”Nope,” Yibo spoke finally. “After…”

”Oh...so this...is quite new?” Yubin gestured to them. 

”Yep,” Yibo narrowed his eyes at the boy. “By the way, I didn't appreciate you giving my boyfriend a lap dance.”

”Sorry, bro! Didn't know,” Yubin chuckled.

”Hmm...whatever,” Yibo rolled his eyes.

”Yibo’s always been possessive about his Zhan-ge,” Xuan Lu smirked. “Or do you call him something else now? Honey? Bunny?”

”Ooo, baby? Baobei? Darling?”

”Shut up!” Zhan glared at them. “That’s private.”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded with a grin. “For Zhan-ge’s ears only.”

”Ugh,” Zan Jin groaned. “You both are sickeningly sweet. I wish I had a partner!”

”You could if you wanted to…,” Zhan smirked. “You just have to gather the courage to ask them out...of course that's assuming you,” he cleared his throat purposefully, “have someone you like.”

”Uhh...I…,” Zan Jin looked down, flustered. “No, I don't…”

”Ah...so you’re single?” Zhan’s smirk widened. “I have someone in mind for you? Shall I set you up on a blind date?” 

”Who?” Haikuan piped up immediately, and a little too loudly.

”Oh, just a friend who I think likes Zan Jin…”

”Someone else likes him too?” Haikuan blurted out and then froze. “I mean...someone likes him?”

Gasps and giggles started erupting around the table and soon, two red-faced boys were fidgeting nervously with their plates as everyone’s focus shifted from Zhan and Yibo to them.

Relieved at the distraction, Yibo leaned in closer and whispered in Zhan’s ear.

”You make me the happiest I’ve ever been in my life, Xiao Zhan.”

* * *

The next morning, Zhan woke up to an empty bed. Yibo left a note with multiple xo's and heart sketches. Although not the best at drawing, Yibo had started leaving such notes around Zhan’s home every time he came over. It never ceased to surprise Zhan and he kissed the note, filled with joy and butterflies in his stomach. Just then, his phone pinged with a message.

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge! Guess what?!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: What? What is it, Bo-di?  
>    
>  Yibo: I got it...I got the role...I’ll be working alongside Zhao Liying in the Legend of Fei!!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Wow, Bo-di! That’s awesome! 😲  
>    
>  Yibo: I’m so excited. I’m going to learn so much. It’s such an important step in my career.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m so proud of you, sweetie! 😘  
>    
>  Yibo: Thanks, ge. I can't wait to see you! When can we meet?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’ll be travelling the next few days and then I might go home  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: My family is insisting I be home for Christmas and New Years. And it’s not like I have any event booked.  
>    
>  Yibo: Oh...so we won't be spending the holidays together?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I really want to, Bo-di...but I haven't been home for a long time...  
>    
>  Yibo: I understand, ge. _

Zhan sighed and leaned back.

_I want to bring in the new year with him but...I haven't been home in so long. Ugghh...what should I do?!_ Zhan groaned but another ping snapped him out of his thoughts.

> _Yibo: Don’t worry, ge. We’ll meet later. It’s not a big deal!_ 😘 

_He is so understanding. Of course Yibo understands. My sweet, caring boyfriend._

* * *

__

The weeks passed by slowly as Zhan worked himself to the bone trying to meet all his contract requirements while putting himself out there for any and every audition. His anxiety was off the charts the more he thought of how the only thing he had lined up after the release of the Untamed and Joy of life, was Jade Dynasty.

__

_I’m not even the lead in the Joy of Life. And who knows if the Untamed will even be given a fair chance given its controversial content. What if it doesn’t make it past the censors? What if I can't carry an entire movie on my back? I have no other projects lined up. And Wajijiwa isn't helping! How long can I keep this up?_

__

Zhan sat on his hotel bed, rubbing his chest. The tightness had slowly become a common sensation but today was the first time it had made him feel breathless. He clutched the side of the bed as he tried to regulate his breathing. But his mind was racing. The more he thought of his career, the harder it felt to get a proper breath in all the way to his lungs. Within seconds, he could feel himself spiraling. Everything around him seemed to slow down as his mind raced at a chaotic speed. His chest constricted more and he could feel his heart thumping in his ears.

__

_Relax, Zhan. Breathe. Inhale. Exhale._ Zhan looked around to find something to ground himself. _Think of how far you’ve come. Think of your home. Think of your family. Think of Yibo._

__

_Yibo._

__

Zhan felt his body relax ever so slightly.

__

_Yibo._ His mind repeated. 

__

Slowly, Zhan felt his breathing return to normal. With a few more forceful inhales, he felt his breath reach all the way to his stomach. He could feel his body again. He let go of the sheet and lay back on the bed, with a long sigh.

__

”Yibo,” Zhan smiled, finally relaxing completely as his anxious thoughts were replaced by images of Yibo smiling at him.

__


	67. There's nowhere else I'd rather be

* * *

Finally the day had come, Yibo paced the dressing room. The New Year gala was a big deal. Even though he had done it before, the sheer scale of the event was enough to make him nervous. His heart ached for Zhan’s soothing voice, his calming presence, his warm comforting smile, his loving embrace

_I wish Zhan-ge was here._ Yibo bit his lip. _It’s okay, Yibo. He needs to be with his family. Don't be so selfish._

__

”Ready?” Wang Han’s voice interrupted his pacing.

__

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and did a little jog in place.

__

”Don't worry. You’ll do great!” Wang Han patted his back affectionately.

__

* * *

__

Yibo took a deep breath and stepped into his car. The event had been a huge success but his heart was heavy and morose. He kept having flashes of himself on stage, looking around, searching, hoping, believing. Until, he didn't believe any more. Not one sign in the myriad signs was for him. 

__

_Am I even an idol if I don't have fans cheering for me?_

__

Yibo put his earphones in and shut his eyes, letting his favorite songs block all his thoughts. He didn't realize when and how he reached his apartment and crashed into his bed. Drearily, he pulled out his phone and opened the unread message from Zhan.

__

> _Zhan-ge: Happy New Year, Bo-di! I love you so much. I’m sorry I’m not there with you but I’ll make it up to you soon! I promise.  
>    
>  Yibo: Happy New Year, ge. Don't apologize. I love you.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Bo-di! Didn't expect you to be online. Thought you’d be at the after party? How was your concert?!  
>  _

Yibo felt tears burn the back of his eyes. He swallowed and typed slowly through his blurry vision.

__

> __
> 
> _Yibo: It was okay..._
> 
> __

_  
_

A few seconds later, a video call lit up Yibo’s screen and he answered it immediately, relieved and happy to see Zhan.

__

”Hi…,” Zhan smiled and Yibo could see he was tucked into bed comfortably.

__

”Hey,” Yibo smiled back.

__

”What happened, didi? Why just okay?”

__

”I just...I didn't see any fans that were there for me. It felt like...I wasn't successful...like I’m not good at my job...like I failed.”

__

”Yibo,” Zhan spoke soothingly. “You have so many fans. I don't know what happened at the concert but I do know one thing….you are not a failure...you are the most hardworking person I know. And you are a natural at this...you were born to be an entertainer. Slowly but surely, you’re making your way up and you will achieve all your goals.”

__

”Hmm,” Yibo mumbled. “Thanks, ge.”

__

”I mean every word.”

__

”I think...I should sleep now. I’ll be...I’ll be fine tomorrow.”

__

”Do you have work tomorrow?”

__

”No...tomorrow’s off…”

__

”Good...get some rest, Bo-di. I’ll call you tomorrow okay? And if you can't sleep or are still feeling low, just call me any time okay?”

__

Yibo nodded with a teary smile and sent a flying kiss to Zhan. Zhan sighed and rolled onto this other side, smiling. He caressed the screen and smiled at Yibo, his heart overflowing with longing and love. Finally, they ended the call with more goodbyes and miss you’s.

__

_I should be with him. He is so low. He shouldn't be alone on new year’s and especially after what happened._

__

Zhan sat up, fretting.

__

”He won't be...he won't start the year alone,” Zhan spoke in a determined voice and then pulled out his phone.

__

* * *

__

Yibo woke up to knocking on his door. He could still feel the heavy sinking feeling in his chest. His numbness cracked only when he reached for his phone and noticed the time.

__

”11 am!? Wow, I slept in late!”

__

He stretched with a groan and went to open the door. He rubbed his eyes twice and then did a double take when he realized that what he was seeing was real, and not a dream.

__

”Zhan-ge!?” Yibo exclaimed.

__

”Bo-di!” Zhan beamed at him and stepped closer.

__

”Wha...what are you doing here?”

__

“I want to start the new year with my boyfriend,” Zhan grinned. "So I took the first flight out!"

__

”Really?” Yibo’s eyes widened and his voice reduced to a whisper.

__

”Yes,” Zhan nodded and held Yibo’s hands. “And what kind of a boyfriend would I be if I let you be alone when you’re so upset?”

__

Yibo leapt forward and hugged Zhan who laughed as he tried to maintain his balance.

__

”I love you, Zhan-ge. Thank you!”

__

Zhan’s smile vanished when he realized that Yibo was shaking, his body pressed against him.

__

”Bo-di? Yibo?” Zhan tried pulling away to get a look at him but Yibo only pulled him closer.

__

”Sweetie? Are you crying?”

__

”I…,” Yibo tried suppressing his sobs but to no avail.

__

“Let’s...how about we go inside first?”

__

Zhan walked them backwards, not letting go of Yibo. Once inside, he held him tighter until the sobs settled eventually. 

__

”There was no one there.” Yibo sniffled. “Not one fan. Not one sign.”

__

Zhan’s mind knew that that was probably not true, but his heart knew what Yibo meant. Zhan was in the same boat. He knew the feeling. The feeling that no matter how hard he worked, it wasn't enough. That even now, his career wasn't where he hoped it would be. Like all his efforts were in vain.

__

”It’s okay...let it out,” he held Yibo close and massaged his back as the boy broke down again. “I’m here.”

__

”Thank you,” Yibo whispered when his sobs had finally diminished. “Thank you for being here.”

__

”There’s nowhere else I’d rather be, sweetie.”

__

”Mmm,” Yibo hummed happily as he felt his optimism and cheer return slowly.

__

”Also, I have a new year’s gift for you,” Zhan pulled back.

__

He reached into his pocket and Zhan saw him hold a key in his hand.

__

”It’s a key to my apartment. For you,” he placed it in Yibo’s hand eagerly.

__

”Oh…,” Yibo’s jaw dropped. “I...this…”

__

”You don't have to give me yours...no pressure...I just thought...this would make it more convenient…,” Zhan rambled on.

__

”No...no...I want to too,” Yibo sprinted to the living room and Zhan heard a drawer being yanked open and some rummaging and clattering sounds. Finally, Yibo returned, waving a key in his hand.

__

”I want you to have a key to my place too, ge!!” He huffed.

__

”Sure?” Zhan asked carefully, even as he eyed the key, his eagerness growing.

__

”Yes,” Yibo smiled and reached out to pull Zhan closer. “You already have the key to my heart, ge. So of course you should have the key to my house."

Zhan blushed as he lowered his gaze in embarrassment.

"How about we seal this deal with a kiss, Zhan-ge?”

Zhan smiled as Yibo leaned forward and wrapped his lips around Zhan's. They sighed into the kiss, their hearts filled with bliss and love. Zhan felt all of Yibo's emotions poured into the kiss. They stood there swaying to music only they could hear, their bodies following their hearts. 


	68. I'll never let you be alone again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm officially on Twitter!! Find me, follow me, comment at me, let's drown in our yizhan delulu together!! 
> 
> [@jalpari_yizhan](https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan)

* * *

Yibo enveloped Zhan’s lips and pulled him closer. Zhan sighed into the kiss and wrapped his arms around Yibo, running his hands through his hair. Zhan moaned as Yibo deepened the kiss and slowly moved his hands down Zhan’s back and rested it on his ass. He squeezed the plump cheeks and grinded his hips against Zhan.

Yibo was aroused by the sensation of Zhan’s round cheeks in his hands. He groaned and attacked Zhan’s lips with renewed vigour. Zhan clutched Yibo’s hips and walked him further into the apartment.When they were inside the bedroom, Yibo pressed Zhan against the wall and rolled his tongue up his neck all the way up the side of his face till the ear. 

”Yibo,” Zhan moaned softly as he tilted his head to one side, giving Yibo more access. 

Yibo pulled back and turned Zhan’s face to him by the chin. He stared deeply into his eyes and Zhan felt himself blush under the intense gaze. Seeing Zhan so delicate and vulnerable stirred something primal in Yibo.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispered in a low husky voice.

”Hmm?” Zhan looked at him expectantly.

”I want to feel you...I want to be inside you…”

Zhan’s eyes darkened and he felt his erection grow. Yibo was almost pressed flat against him and he sensed the change in Zhan’s body. He smirked as he rolled against Zhan, eliciting a gasp. Zhan closed his eyes and his body trembled with anticipation.

”Do you want me inside you, sweetheart?”

Zhan’s breath caught and he felt his entire body catch fire as he heard the term of endearment. He swallowed and rested his forehead on Yibo’s shoulder and let out a meek hum.

”Hmm…”

”I want it too, ge. So bad…”

”What...what else do you want to do to me,” Zhan raised his head and eyed Yibo almost breathless.

”I want to kiss you all over your body,” Yibo reached for Zhan’s shirt and pulled it off in one swift motion.

Zhan sighed and nodded.

”I want to fuck you with my tongue...fuck you with my fingers,” Yibo purred in Zhan’s ears as his fingers began undoing Zhan’s pants. 

”And…?” Zhan shuddered as he felt his pants sliding down and Yibo’s fingers caressing his ass, making their way to his opening.

”I want to fuck you with my dick...you like my dick, don't you, ge?”

”Mmm...I love it,” Zhan murmured, licking Yibo’s lips. “I love how big it is...I want to feel you fill me up.”

”Oh, I’ll fill you up good, sweetheart…,” Yibo smirked. “I’ll fuck you so hard...you’ll be begging for mercy…”

”Even if I beg for mercy,” Zhan pulled on Yibo’s lip with his teeth and then breathed along his jawline to his ear, “Don’t stop,” he whispered seductively.

Yibo froze and felt his dick spring up to full erection, already dripping with some pre cum.

”Ge…,” Yibo gulped. “Are you sure?”

”Have your way with me, Wang Yibo,” Zhan caught hold of Yibo’s hands and pressed them against his ass hard indicating how rough he wanted it. “Fuck me till I can't walk. Can you do that for me, Wang Yibo.”

There was something both pleading and commanding in Zhan's voice. And that did it. With a growl, Yibo yanked Zhan and pushed him onto the bed. He threw his clothes off, nearly ripping his shirt, and climbed onto bed, knees on either side of Zhan’s body. He trapped Zhan and pinned his arms down to the bed, crashing his lips against him. He ate his lips, his tongue, his mouth hungrily and desperately. 

His lips bit their way down Zhan’s neck and latched onto his chest. He sank his teeth in and sucked the skin raw until he had left a bruise big and red. Satisfied, he made his way lower, biting, sucking, licking. 

Zhan gasped at the aggressive contact. His fingers grabbed Yibo’s hair and pushed him harder against his body. Yibo intensified his nibbles as he paused on Zhan’s hardness and greedily lapped the length, sucking at the head like it was a lollipop. Spurred on by Zhan’s moans and the tightening grip on his hair, he engulfed Zhan with his mouth while his hands travelled below Zhan, grabbing his ass.

He squeezed them hard enough to leave grip marks and then came back to the front to cup Zhan’s balls. He increased his pace sucking on Zhan’s erection which his hands massaged the balls, eventually making his way to the still unopened slit. Images of him entering it flooded Yibo’s mind and he lost all self control.

He pulled back and roughly turned Zhan over, who obliged easily, almost as if he was waiting for Yibo to do so. Yibo took one look at Zhan’s plump ass and before he knew what he was doing, he smacked one cheek with a loud slap.

”Aahh,” Zhan jerked up.

”Did that hurt?” Yibo leaned over and kissed Zhan’s shoulder.

”Ye..yes,” Zhan stuttered, “but…”

”You liked it?” Yibo smirked, biting on the shoulder now.

”Mmm,” Zhan blushed.

Yibo sat back and smacked the other cheek even harder, pleased at the sight of it turning red. He bent forward and bit the cheek, kneading into the other one with rough hands. 

”Fu...ahh...Yibo,” Zhan groaned in pleasure.

”Get on your knees,” Yibo growled in a commanding voice.

Zhan felt his stomach flip and a shiver ran down his body, hungry with anticipation. He got on all fours and arched his back, head lowered, waiting. Yibo licked the back of his legs from his knee to the spot where his ass met his thigh.

”Zhan-ge is so tasty,” Yibo murmured against his skin. “So fucking delicious.”

Zhan shuddered at the sensations. But before he could calm his racing heart, Zhan’s body lurched forward as he felt a wet tongue lick the gap between his ass thoroughly. He clinched his eyes shut and bit his lip as the wetness sucked on the opening, harder and faster. 

When the tongue pulled back, Zhan let out a whine but was immediately attacked by a finger, probing into the slit. Yibo quickly pulled away and grabbed the lube from the night stand lathering his finger lavishly. He prodded back into Zhan and alternated between using his finger and his tongue.

”Zhan’s head was spinning. He could barely support his body as another finger entered him and eventually, a third finger explored his wet insides. Yibo’s fingers found the spot after a few seconds and Zhan had never felt a rush of electricity like he did at that moment.

He dropped his face to the bed, raising his hips higher and backwards, needing more. Yibo obliged with a smirk as his fingers fucked into Zhan harder, massaging the spot over and over. His tongue licked Zhan all over while his other hand reached forward for Zhan’s erection once more. 

”Bo-di…,” Zhan panted. “Fuck me, already! I need you...in me…”

Yibo didn't need to be asked twice. He pulled on a condom hastily and massaged Zhan’s opening, scissoring it lovingly a few more times, before lining himself with it. Slowly but surely, he entered Zhan, grunting at the tightness that engulfed him.

Both their moans filled the room and perspiration began sliding down Yibo. He looked at Zhan’s shining skin, arched back, and pliable body. Lust began driving him to the edge and he pushed himself in, prompting Zhan to tremble and then still.

”Is it too much?”

”No...yeah...but don't stop…”

Yibo slowly pulled out again and inserted himself in once more, faster this time. The sensations that spread through his body were indescribably. He felt tingles cover every part of him and his knees felt weak. Feeling Zhan pressing back into him, he groaned harder and then resumed moving.

Yibo leaned back, hands gripping Zhan’s hips, and watched as he entered Zhan repeatedly. As he rammed into him fervently, he watched with dark eyes as Zhan’s cheeks vibrated with every slap of his hip. He groped them and smacked them.

Yes…,” Zhan mumbled, his face pressed against the bed. “Fuck...don't stop…”

Yibo increased his pace even further and the sound of his hips slapping against Zhan became louder and lewder.

”Zhan-ge...do you have any idea how beautiful you are...so beautiful...and all mine,” Yibo growled.

”All yours,” Zhan managed to say breathlessly as Yibo fucked him harder.

Zhan’s moans reached a crescendo and a few minutes later as Yibo grunted frantically, slamming harder into him, they both erupted into a wave of pleasure, crashing together. 

Yibo felt his knees cave and he fell forward with Zhan, lying down on the bed, spent and fragile. They lay still for a few minutes, blissed out. Slowly, Yibo pulled out, causing Zhan’s body to squirm a little bit and eliciting a weak moan. He kissed Zhan’s shoulder and neck and back and then sat up, putting the condom carefully aside after tying it. 

He lay down beside Zhan and ran his fingers up and down his back.

”Zhan-ge…”

Zhan opened his eyes and smiled brightly at Yibo who felt his heart flutter at the radiant expression. Yibo leaned forward and kissed Zhan gently but Zhan latched on and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss.

”Woah...still going, huh?” Yibo chuckled when Zhan let go. 

”That was amazing,” Zhan sighed, scooting closer and kissing Yibo’s chin.

”It was,” Yibo wrapped his arm around Zhan.

”It felt so...good...you inside me…”

”Yeah?” Yibo grinned.

”Yeah,” Zhan nodded and kissed Yibo’s chest a few times.

”This was the best way to begin 2019. Thank you for coming, ge.”

”How could I not? There’s no way I could let you be alone, sweetie.”

Yibo felt his eyes burn and he let the tears escape. Zhan smiled fondly and wiped the tears. He reached forward and kissed Yibo’s damp cheek.

”I’ll never let you be alone again. I promise.”

”I’ll always be there for you too, ge. Promise.”

”I want to start and end every year in your arms just like this.”

”I can make that happen...there’s no way I’m letting you go.” Yibo smiled and hugged Zhan closer. “Never.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to address the comments about Zhan's panic attack from before - as someone living with mental health issues, I have been through severe panic attacks and I know how horrendous they can be. I make it a point to write about difficult things in my work, be it social issues like sexual harassment or mental health issues like anxiety. I firmly believe that someone out there reading this will relate and find it comforting to see a character go through something they have been through themselves. 
> 
> On a lighter note, to the people who seemed relieved that I didn't let anything happen to their Zhan-Zhan...brace yourselves is all I'll say. 😅 😜 😂


	69. Come back to me

* * *

Yibo hadn’t seen Zhan in two weeks and now he was running back to his dressing room impatient to get his make-up off and change and leave quickly.

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge! I’m almost done. I can come over in an hour. Want me to get some food?_

Twenty minutes later.

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge? You’re home, right?_

Yibo frowned and dialed Zhan. Once, twice, thrice. Yet, Zhan never answered.

> _Yibo: Where are you, ge?! I'm almost there._

Yibo pressed the button to the top floor and leaned back against the elevator with a long sigh. When the door slid open slowly, he suppressed his yawns and made his way to Zhan’s apartment. Yibo knocked a few times and waited. When there was no response, he knocked again with a groan. 

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo exclaimed in frustration and rested his forehead against the door.

After a few more minutes of knocking, Yibo suddenly remembered that now he had the key to the apartment. He took the key out hastily and unlocked the door.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo muttered in confusion as he stepped inside.

The apartment was eerily quiet. Yibo walked across the living room and noticed that the only light in the apartment was the narrow beam escaping through the gap in Zhan’s bedroom door. 

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo entered the bedroom.

He froze in his spot when he saw Zhan, on the ground, in a foetal position. He was entirely still and Yibo’s heart stopped when he couldn't discern the gentle in and out of him breathing.

”Zhan-ge!?” 

He ran forward and landed on his knee by Zhan’s limp body. Yibo raised Zhan up by the shoulders and held him in his arms. With one hand, he patted Zhan’s cheek. His entire face paled when Zhan didn't move. 

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo’s voice trembled as his hands reached out to feel Zhan’s pulse.

He gulped nervously when he couldn't find it. He placed his fingers under Zhan’s nose and let out a soft sigh of relief when he felt Zhan’s slow breathing. His hand scrambled for his phone and he called his driver, frantic and panicked.

”Yeah...get the car around...we need to go to the hospital...right now!!”

* * *

”Patient’s heart rate is extremely low,” the doctor spoke hurriedly as the team wheeled Zhan in. “His entire body is cold...we need to get him on a drip immediately.”

Yibo followed them, holding back his tears as his entire body trembled. They took him deeper into the hospital, leaving behind the common areas, the lobby, the many rooms and labs until they were in a relatively quiet and empty part of the hospital. As they pushed through another door and entered a long corridor, a nurse held Yibo back.

”Sorry, sir. You can't go beyond this point.”

Yibo alternated between looking at her and Zhan being wheeled further away from him. He gaped at her in confusion, unable to speak. As he watched Zhan moving away, his entire body sprung to life and his brain managed to cluster some words together.

”I’m not leaving him alone,” Yibo replied angrily. “You don't understand...I’m the only family he has here...I’m not going anywhere!”

”Sir…”

”Please…,” Yibo stopped trying to get away and turned to face the nurse, “please…,” he pleaded as his voice reduced to a whisper.

”There’s another waiting room inside but it’s only for permitted visitors. I’ll get you the forms to fill out.” The nurse sighed and gave in.

Yibo followed them down the corridor hastily, nodding and running his hand through his hair. When he caught up, he watched silently, shaking, as they attached tubes and needles to Zhan’s weak body. Once they were done, the room emptied and Yibo felt a heavy silence descend around him. 

He pulled a chair up to the bed and held on to Zhan’s hand. He gazed at the sleeping face and brushed aside a strand of hair from it. His heart broke as he searched the face for some sign of life, for the familiar warmth of the smile that would light up his day, for the kind look in the deep brown eyes that never failed to comfort him. But all he saw was a pale, weak, fragile face that was miles and miles away from the Zhan he knew and recognized.

_He’s still so thin from the Untamed shoot. He looks so fragile. What happened? How did I not notice something was wrong?!_

When he heard approaching footsteps, Yibo scrambled up and let go of Zhan’s hand just as the doctor returned. He felt a pang when he realized that even in such a dire situation, he had to be careful and maintain a certain distance from Zhan. 

_One day, Yibo._ He calmed himself. _One day, I am going to stand by Zhan-ge and not have to hide my true feelings and the real nature of our relationship._

”Is everything...what happ…” Yibo began inquiring, hesitant and scared.

”Looks like he was on blood pressure medication. Sometimes, patients can be prone to dizziness due to the resulting lower blood pressure. He should have kept tabs on his blood pressure while taking that medicine. It got too low.”

”What,” Yibo’s head was spinning, unable to digest all the information. “I didn't know...will he be okay?”

”Yes,” the doctor smiled, “don't worry...but once he’s awake, we need to adjust his medication. And he needs to increase his weight. But most importantly, I need to know why he was prescribed this medication. He’s too young to have high blood pressure issues. Unless he was taking these for anxiety...it’s pretty common nowadays.”

”Huh? Uh...okay,” Yibo mumbled as the doctor nodded and left the room.

Yibo sat down and gazed at Zhan. He leaned forward and massaged Zhan’s forehead, running his hand through Zhan’s hair.

”What is going on, Zhan-ge? What have you been hiding from me?”

The more he gazed at the still unconscious face, the more his heart sank. A debilitating fear spread through his body and filled him up with dreadful thoughts of a life without Zhan, of what would have happened if he hadn't been over at Zhan’s apartment that night, of how delicate life could be, of how his dream future could have been snatched away from him in the blink of an eye. 

”It doesn’t matter, Zhan-ge...nothing matters...just come back...please come back to me.” Yibo finally let his tears out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, everyone. Breathe. We'll get through this together. The slow burn may be done, but I have a whole tank of angst that I'm going to dump on you. But just keep breathing. Together, we will survive!


	70. I'm never too busy

* * *

”Hi...yeah...I’m still here...no...I’m not coming tomorrow. You have to cancel all my commitments for tomorrow...I don’t care...I’m not...I said I’m not going to leave the hospital until he wakes up and I know he’s going to be okay….I have no way of informing his family yet...so until he is awake and they can come here...I am not moving. Please.”

Yibo ended the call with a sigh. He had anticipated that his manager would resist but he had made up his mind. Until Zhan was up and out of danger and he could inform his family so that he would not be alone, Yibo was not going anywhere. He glanced at the time.

_11 pm. I should get some rest._

He took one long look at Zhan and then stood up and stretched. He had been sitting by Zhan’s side, unmoving, for almost two hours. Yet, there was no change in his condition. With a final stretch, he walked to the couch that lined the window and spread the pillow and blanket that the staff had left for him.

The nurse had given him a comforting kind smile when she brought in the items and had also suggested he get dinner before the cafeteria closed. But Yibo had no appetite. He thanked her and as soon as she had left, he held Zhan’s hand once more and sat there, waiting patiently, planting occasional kisses along Zhan’s arm and shoulder.

Yibo lay down on his side and stared at Zhan, hoping to see some tiny movement, some indication that he was truly alive and would wake up soon. After twenty minutes of staring and fretting, Yibo took his phone out and scrolled through Weibo. Bored, he began going through his old messages with Zhan. Tears began forming at the corner of his eyes once more as he read their loving messages during the two weeks they had been apart.

> _Zhan-ge: Miss you, didi...I was just thinking about last summer...so many memories  
>    
>  Yibo: Yeah? Which one in particular, ge?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Remember when you finally had three lines in one scene and you still kept messing them up?! It was so hot, I nearly choked you!  
>    
>  Yibo: How can I forget that? You yelled my name so angrily and kicked me. I thought you were really pissed!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I could never really be angry at you, Bo-di._ 😘 

Yibo rolled onto his back and smiled at that message. It was true. Zhan could never stay mad at him and he took full advantage of that. He scrolled through more messages.

> _Zhan-ge: ‘m bored! What are you doing?  
>    
>  Yibo: Just in between shots. Few more days and I’ll be back home to get rid of your boredom.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Hmm…  
>    
>  Yibo: What happened, ge? You seem dull.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I just wish...I’m bored because I don’t have that much work...not as much as I’d like.  
>    
>  Yibo: Don’t worry, ge. It will all work out soon. I know it will. Mark my words!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Thanks, Bo-di ❤️  
>    
>  Yibo: ❤️.  
>    
>  Yibo: That’s how I show off my love for you to the world for now, ge.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Is that supposed to be my mole?!  
>    
>  Yibo: Yup! I even drew it at an interview once. Of course no one can tell what it really means!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Bo-di! That’s so sweet but you have to be careful!! 🤦🏻 _

_Was that what it was? Was he taking the medicine for anxiety? Was he this stressed out by his career issues? Zhan-ge always feels his emotions so deeply. I remember how he broke down when we wrapped up shooting. I should have asked him more, I should have been there more._ Yibo covered his face with his arm. 

”I should have been there for him.” He whispered into the silence.

Yibo wiped his eyes and continued scrolling through the messages again. He kissed the phone when he came across some of the selfies and photos Zhan had sent him. He chuckled at the funny faces Zhan had sent him whenever he started their rainbow farting battles. He blushed at all the naughty things Zhan would text him when they were apart for too long. He swallowed his misery when he saw just how much Zhan cared and loved and supported him.

_I can't believe that everything I wanted last year has come true now. I can't believe Zhan-ge is mine and I am his._ Yibo turned to look at Zhan. _I can't believe this is happening. No matter what, I am going to be right by his side. Through all of it._

__

With that thought, Yibo stood up and walked over to Zhan once more. He sat down beside the bed and took Zhan’s hand in his. 

__

”I’m right here, ge. You are going to be okay. I’m going to be right here when you wake up. Just please...please fight through this...and come back to me.”

__

Yibo felt something stir in his hand. He looked at the hand that lay limp in his grasp but nothing happened. He exhaled in disappointment and was about to get some water, when the hand that he was holding on to, twitched again.

__

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo shot up like an arrow. “Zhan-ge?”

__

Yibo stood up and leaned closer to Zhan’s face. A few seconds later, Zhan’s eyes flickered open and he looked back at Yibo with a dazed look. A meek and raspy voice filled Yibo’s eager ears.

__

”Bo-di?”

__

”Zhan-ge…Zhan-ge...it’s me...your Bo-di…,” Yibo exclaimed but soon his voice was muffled as he threw himself at Zhan and buried his face in Zhan’s neck.

__

”Bo-di? Wha...what happened? Where am I?”

__

”You’re in the hospital, ge. You...you passed out.”

__

”I what?” Zhan’s eyes widened but his voice remained weak. 

__

”You fainted, sweetheart,” Yibo ran his hand over Zhan’s forehead soothingly, “but it’s going to be okay now...I’ll get the doctor.”

__

”How did...how did I...I don't remember what happened,” Zhan looked confused.

__

”They said,” Yibo paused with hesitation, “...they said your blood pressure was too low...because of some medicine you were taking...for high blood pressure...and anxiety.”

__

”Oh,” Zhan froze as Yibo levelled his gaze on him. “Yibo...I…”

__

”Shh…,” Yibo placed a kiss on his forehead to comfort a visibly guilt-ridden Zhan, “it’s okay...we’ll discuss it later. What’s most important now is that you’re fine. Whatever it is, ge...whatever the reason was...we will get through it together. But...please don't hide anything from me.”

__

”I’m sorry, Yibo,” Zhan nodded. “I...didn't want to worry you...you’re so busy...and I just…”

__

”I’m never too busy for you...or your problems…,” Yibo caressed Zhan’s cheek. “You come first.”

__

Zhan teared up and pulled Yibo close by his shirt. Dry, trembling lips met Yibo’s and Yibo enveloped them as his hands cradled Zhan’s neck. 

__

”Do you have any idea how terrified I was?” Yibo pulled back but didn't move away.

__

His face lingered mere inches from Zhan’s.

__

”I’m sorry,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s nose. 

__

”I thought I had...that I’d lost you…,” now it was Yibo’s turn to tear up as he spoke in a shaky voice.

__

”I’m right here,” Zhan whispered. “I’m right here.”

__


	71. I can feel it in the kiss

* * *

”Alright then, Xiao Zhan,” the doctor flipped through the report, “it looks like your vitals are normal. You can leave once the discharging paperwork is done.”

”Thank you,” Zhan nodded as he continued sipping on the juice Yibo handed to him.

”But I would like you to see our physician later about the high blood pressure medication and if it’s really necessary. If you were taking it for some other reasons, we could address them with alternative measures.”

Zhan looked down, guilty and ashamed, and nodded slowly. He glanced at Yibo but was relieved to find him nodding at the doctor, all his attention hanging onto every word the man spoke. Zhan longed to intertwine his fingers with Yibo’s to feel reassured and secure but this was not a safe place for that.

As if sensing his gaze, Yibo turned to him and gave him a small smile and squeezed his shoulder. When the doctor left, Yibo began folding the blanket.

”Ge...you should inform your parents.”

”I don't want to worry them. I’m fine now.”

Yibo paused and turned to look at Zhan who was still sipping on the juice.

”What about the other stuff?”

”I..I don't know how to tell them about all that. They’ll ask a lot of questions and they already keep telling me I can come back any time...this will just make them more convinced that I should give up being an actor.”

”Well then, can you...can we talk about it at least?” Yibo looked at Zhan, unsure of what his answer would be.

Up until now, their relationship had been all lovey-dovey and romantic. The honeymoon phase. But now things were getting real. This was the first serious incident in their relationship and Yibo didn't know how much he could prod, where the line was, where he was pushing too far. To his relief, Zhan smiled at him affectionately.

”Of course, Bo-di,” Zhan stretched his hand out gesturing for Yibo to sit beside him. “I won't hide anything from you ever again. You are my partner...and we will go through all the ups and downs together. It was stupid of me to not let you in. If it were the other way around, I would want to know.”

Yibo sighed in relief and sat down beside Zhan, wrapping his arm around Zhan’s shoulder. When Zhan leaned against Yibo’s chest, Yibo kissed Zhan’s head.

”Good,” Yibo whispered and Zhan felt his entire body relax.

* * *

”Don't you have work today?” Zhan asked once they were inside his apartment.

”I took the day off.”

”Bo-di! You don't have to...I’m feeling fine now!”

”There’s no way I am leaving you alone so soon after you literally passed out, ge. Plus, we have to still talk about...what happened.”

”Fine,” Zhan smiled and wrapped his arms around Yibo. “Thank you,” he added as he rested against Yibo’s warm neck.

”I ordered food on our way here. It should be here any minute.” Yibo swayed gently with Zhan in his arms.

”Hmm, I want to freshen up first.”

”Okay, me too after that. I must stink! I came over here last night straight from my shoot.”

”Yeah, you stink,” Zhan pulled back and scrunched his nose.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo feigned a scowl and grabbed him back into the embrace. “I’m going to rub my stench all over you!”

”Wang Yibo!! Are you even human?! Let me go!” Zhan cackled.

Yibo pulled Zhan closer and caught his lips in his. He immediately probed Zhan’s tongue and deepened the kiss. His entire body was pressed against Zhan and he gripped him harder with every lick and nibble. His mind thanked all the gods above that he was holding a happy and healthy Zhan once again in his arms.

”I missed you too,” Zhan smiled when they finally pulled apart.

”I didn't say that,” Yibo raised an eyebrow.

”I can feel it in the kiss,” Zhan pressed his thumb against Yibo’s lips.

”How about I make you feel it with something else?” Yibo smirked and rolled his hips against Zhan’s.

”I think I’d like that very much,” Zhan grabbed Yibo’s ass and led them further into the apartment, all the way to the shower.

They dropped their clothes off one by one as they walked towards the bathroom. With each step, the kisses became more frantic and desperate. Zhan devoured Yibo’s lips and moaned in satisfaction as he felt their erections rub against each other. Yibo turned the shower on and held Zhan close, letting their bodies get drenched.

He slid his hands down Zhan’s back and to his thin waist, enjoying the feeling of Zhan’s wet soft skin. His tongue made its way down Zhan’s neck as he lapped the fresh water that flowed freely over Zhan’s entire body.

”You’re so tasty, ge,” Yibo whispered breathless as he licked every part of Zhan.

”Yibo,” Zhan moaned as he bit into his neck.

”What do you want from me, ge?” Yibo pulled back and pressed their foreheads together. “Anything you want…,” He nipped at Zhan’s lips.

”I want your soft plump lips around my dick,” Zhan whined as Yibo licked his earlobe.

”Good,” Yibo smirked and before Zhan could say anything more, he knelt down in front of Zhan and looked at his body greedily, filled with lust.

”I missed you so much, ge,” Yibo murmured as he placed kisses on Zhan’s erection. “So much,” he repeated again as he licked the entire length.

”Fuck,” Zhan groaned and leaned his head back against the tiled wall. “I missed you too.”

”What did you miss about me, ge?” Yibo asked as he proceeded to suck on the head, rolling his tongue over it repeatedly.

”I...ahh,” Zhan moaned, “I missed your smile…”

”And?” Yibo pulled back before taking Zhan in deeper. “Keep going.”

”And your lips...you take me in so good, Bo-di...and your chest...I just wanna bite it…”

”Mmm,” Yibo purred, sucking harder and faster.

”And your arms...so lean and strong...ahhh...and...your dick...fuck I missed your dick…”

Zhan couldn't speak any more as Yibo took him all the way in, deep throating him until Zhan could barely stand. He clutched Yibo’s hair, guiding him faster and Yibo let Zhan fuck his mouth. Again and again and again.

”Yibo...ahhh...I won't last long,” Zhan panted, breathless and moaning. 

Yibo ran his fingers up Zhan’s inner thighs and cupped his balls. With a few more groans, Zhan’s body erupted and he came in Yibo’s ready mouth, fast and hard. Zhan rested his entire body against the wall, spent and satisfied.

Yibo stood up wiping his chin and licking his lips.

”So tasty,” he smirked again and grabbed Zhan for another kiss, deep and passionate. Zhan clashed their tongues together while his hands clawed Yibo’s back in an attempt to pull him closer and closer until there was no space for even water to come between them.

”Wow,” Yibo muttered when they paused. 

”What?”

”My boyfriend is so hot,” Yibo grinned.

”Shut up,” Zhan blushed and pushed Yibo away.

”I love how you can't handle me complimenting you, ge. Do you have any idea how cute you look?” Yibo smiled affectionately and planted a soft kiss on Zhan’s cheek.

Stop it!” Zhan giggled. “It’s your turn now,” Zhan reached for Yibo’s erection.

”No, you’re still weak ge. Let’s shower quickly before the food comes.”

”Are you sure?”

”Yeah, we have the whole day,” Yibo winked.


	72. I promise, my puppy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 10,000 views and 550 kudos. I'm dead. I can't.

* * *

Yibo had guessed correct. All the work stress was getting to be too much for Zhan. And since his natural tendency was to shut down and not trouble others, he had been dealing with his stress and anxiety all alone. It had gotten to a point where the panic attacks had become regular. 

”You need to talk to someone, ge. And if you don't want to go to a therapist, at least start by talking to me. It will help. You’re not alone in this. We all go through similar stuff and it might help you to realize others feel that way too. If you keep thinking about it in your head, the problem will seem way bigger than it really is.”

”Maybe you’re right,” Zhan sighed and took another bite of his food. “It’s just...I feel like I need to move faster in my career...do more...because of my age.”

”What do you mean?” 

”I joined this industry very late, Yibo. And I haven't had the usual route as most idols. I have never been trained. I’m almost 28. If I don't make it soon, I won't make it at all.”

”Okay, firstly,” Yibo put his food aside and knelt in front of Zhan holding his hands in his, “you will make it. I have a gut feeling that our drama is going to propel your career to the stars. Secondly, you are not too old for this industry. Fuck the rules. They are meant to be broken. If I can have two careers, then you can become a superstar at 30.”

”I guess...wait what?! Two careers?!?” Zhan’s eyes widened and he looked at Yibo, bewildered.

”Ohh,” Yibo grinned, embarrassed, “I forgot...I got the news last night when we were at the hospital...I made it...I’m officially in the Yamaha team. I’m going to be a professional racer, ge!”

”YIBO!!!!” Zhan screamed in excitement and pulled him up by the hand. 

He wrapped his arms around Yibo tight and lifted him up, spinning him around.

”That’s such wonderful news!!!! Why didn't you tell me earlier!! I’m so happy and proud!”

”Ge! Put me down!” Yibo laughed. 

When Zhan finally put him down, his smile diminished a little.

”All I could think about yesterday was you, ge. Nothing else mattered. I just wanted you to wake up. I would have gladly given up the race in exchange.”

”Yibo, ah Yibo!” Zhan shook his head and sighed. “There’s no need to do that.”

Yibo bit his lips and looked away and Zhan thought he saw a hint of guilt on his face.

”Yibo…,” he narrowed his eyes. “What did you do?”

”I was supposed to meet the team today but I cancelled it.”

”Yibo! What the…? Call them right now. You are going to that meeting. “

”But, ge...you…”, Yibo protested.

”Me nothing...I am fine...look at me,” Zhan spread his arms out and gestured to his body. “I am perfect. I will be right here when you are done with the meeting.”

Yibo eyed him nervously and hesitated. All he could think about was coming back home to Zhan’s limp body again. The sheer thought shook his entire body.

”No.”

”Yibo,” Zhan snatched his phone from the table and handed it to him. “Call them now.”

”No.”

”Sweetie,” Zhan’s voice softened. “I will be right here...healthy and fine when you’re back. I’m not taking that medicine now...I’m eating properly...and I’ll rest.”

”Promise?” Yibo’s face turned into that of an innocent scared child and tears began forming in his eyes. 

”I promise, my little puppy,” Zhan smiled and placed kisses on Yibo’s cheeks, nose and forehead. “Now call them.”

Yibo nodded and Zhan watched as he made the phone call, a warmth spreading through his entire body.

_How did I get so lucky? He loves me so much. He takes such good care of me. I need to take more care of myself. I will take better care of myself so he never has to go through this again. I don't ever want to make him upset or scared like this ever._

”Okay, the meeting has already been pushed to tomorrow so I don't need to go...but they said I can announce it on Weibo!!” Yibo beamed from ear to ear.

Zhan sat beside him on the couch and together, they chose the photos, brainstormed the caption, edited, and finally worded the post that Yibo would publish, announcing his new career as a racer.

”I’m so proud of you, Bo-di,” Zhan squeezed his arm and placed a kiss on Yibo’s shoulder.

”How proud?” Yibo smirked.

”How about I show you how proud I am,” Zhan grinned as he began unzipping Yibo’s pants.

”Yes please,” Yibo grinned as he lay back.

* * *

”Ge?” Yibo broke the silence as he lay beside Zhan later that night.

”Hmm?” Zhan looked up from the book he was reading and adjusted his glasses.

”You’re so beautiful,” Yibo grinned.

”Are we starting again?” Zhan rolled his eyes.

”But you are!” Yibo grinned wider as he scooched closer to the now smiling Zhan.

Zhan wrapped his arm around Yibo and shook his head.

”I was thinking,” Yibo began, “that we should go on a trip...you need a vacation to relax and get your mind sorted so you can come back and work with renewed vigor and stamina.”

”Yibo…”

”I know what you’ll say. I’m very busy etc etc. But that’s my problem, ge. I’ll manage my schedule. I _want_ to do this. I want us to go away together. Not just for you, but for myself too. Please!”

Zhan looked at Yibo for a long time in silence.

 _How can I say no to that fucking face!_ Zhan groaned and ran his hand down his face.

”Fine!”

”Really?!” Yibo jumped in excitement and hugged Zhan.

”Yes,” Zhan ruffled his hair. “Let’s go on a vacation.”


	73. Here we come

* * *

A few more weeks passed by and Yibo wrapped up the final schedules for Gank your heart and One more try. He had managed to get permission from his TTXS brothers to miss an episode in February and that gave him a week off in the beginning of the month.

Zhan made a health excuse to take the week off. To be fair, it wasn't a total lie and Zhan didn't feel too bad especially given the way his management had been treating him. In order to make up for the week off, their schedules were packed before the trip, to the point that they could never really plan the trip.

”It’s okay, Bo-di,” Zhan smiled at a pouting Yibo on the video call. “I like adventure. I don't want to plan out the whole trip. As long as we pick a place and book accommodation, I don't care. It’ll be fun! We can explore it on our own!”

”Okay!” Yibo’s face lit up on his laptop’s screen. “Let’s pick a place where no one will recognize us. Like Europe?”

”Ah! I’ve never been! I remember you had so much fun in Bulgaria!”

”Do you want to go there, then?” Yibo lay on his stomach.

”No, you’ve been there...let’s pick a place that’s new for both of us!”

”Hmm…,” Yibo pursed his lips as he thought.

”I’m looking at the map on my phone...I want a place where it’s sunny and there’s sandy beaches...and green lush mountains...and beautiful architecture...and not many tourists…,” Zhan kept rambling more to himself than Yibo.

”Wow, that’s a lot of requirements,” Yibo grinned. “How are you going to find a place like that?”

”Hmm...let’s see….wait…”

”What is it? Found something?” Yibo sat up excitedly.

”Yup...these photos are beautiful...it has everything I want Yibo!!”

”Tell me, ge!!”

”Croatia.”

”Oh…”

”What?”

”I...I’ve already been there...2017...with TTXS brothers.”

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan pouted. “Fine...why don’t you tell me where you _haven’t_ been.”

”Sorry, gege,” Yibo chuckled at Zhan’s expression. “I haven’t been anywhere else. But I do have a trip to Italy coming up in March for a fashion show.”

”Ughh…,” Zhan groaned and hid his face in his pillow. “Okay, you pick.”

”Aww...sorry, ge,” Yibo smiled. “Here…,” he held up three fingers. “Pick one finger from these three options I chose...that way you’ll still be the one picking the final place.”

”Okay!” Zhan clapped his hands together, once again excited. “I pick...the middle one!”

”Ooo...nice!”

”Where is it?!”

”Greece!”

”Oh my god!” Zhan squealed. “I love greek architecture...and the beaches are gorgeous.”

”Are you sure? It doesn’t have mountains like Croatia and might be a little more touristy than Croatia too. I really don’t mind going to Croatia again, ge.”

”No,” Zhan lay back down on his stomach, “I want to go somewhere that’s new for the both of us. This is our first trip together. I want it to be special!”

”Okay,” Yibo smiled and nodded.

”So...can we go there, didi?” Zhan looked at him expectantly, visibly thrilled. “Can we go to Greece?!”

”Yes, ge,” Yibo smiled affectionately. “We’ll go wherever my cute bunny wants.”

”Bo-di!” Zhan’s eyes widened. “What did you just call me!?”

”My cute bunny,” Yibo grinned wider.

”So cheesy, Yibo!”

”Only for you, ge,” Yibo puckered his lips and gave his laptop a kiss.

Zhan giggled and then sighed.

”I can't believe it...our first vacation together, Bo-di!”

”We’re going to have many firsts together, Zhan-ge,” Yibo looked at the smiling face on his screen in all earnestness. 

* * *

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge! Where are you?_

Yibo bit his nails nervously as he sat in the flight that would be taking off in a few minutes. And for the past ten minutes, Zhan had not been responding. Visions of an unconscious Zhan flooded Yibo’s mind and he began panicking.

_What if...what if something happened again?_

Just when his mind was about to spiral out of control, Yibo heard a commotion ahead and he sat up, looking in the direction of the noise. His eyes widened when he saw a tall lanky figure balancing several items and rushing towards him.

”Sorry...sorry,” Zhan mumbled as he put his bag in the overhead bin and dumped the remaining items onto his lap as he sat down.

”I was running late and then I got hungry and you know I don't like airport food and I realized you must not have eaten too since you came here straight from your studio…,” Zhan rambled on as he opened the paper bags and pulled out snacks to show Yibo.

Zhan paused when he finally looked at Yibo’s face.

”What happened, Yibo?” Zhan pulled his mask down. “Are you okay? You look...weird.”

”No...nothing,” Yibo stuttered as he tried to smile.

Zhan put the snacks into the seat pocket in front of him and reached over and buckled Yibo in.

”What happened, sweetie?” Zhan whispered as he rubbed the back of Yibo’s hand discreetly.

”I...I thought something happened to you…,” Yibo whispered back and then turned to look out the window.

Before Zhan could say anything, the captain made an announcement that the flight was about to take off and then the plane began to rumble as it moved. Zhan felt Yibo clutch his hand abruptly and when he looked at him, he saw the mild fear on Yibo’s face.

”Yibo...are you scared of flying?” Zhan leaned over.

”Just during take off and landing,” Yibo bit his lip.

”Don’t worry...it’s just a matter of a few seconds,” Zhan smiled and held his hand tighter.

Yibo nodded as the plane began its ascent and shut his eyes as he felt his stomach lurch with it. Just like Zhan had said, a few seconds later, the plane steadied itself and they were finally up in the air. Since it was a late night flight and they would land in Athens at noon, the lights were dimmed so that the travellers could rest and adjust to the time difference.

Silence settled in the plane and all that could be heard was the gentle hum of the engines. Zhan lifted the arm rest between them and moved it out of the way. He spread the blanket across both their bodies, and Yibo glanced at him with a meek smile.

Zhan looked around and when he was reassured that everyone was either resting or watching their TV screens, he scooted closer to Yibo.

”I’m sorry, Bo-di,” Zhan placed a kiss on Yibo’s cheek. “I didn't mean for you to worry.”

”It’s okay, ge. I just got ahead of myself...and let my mind jump to the worst case scenario...

”I didn't realize just how traumatized you were by that incident.”

”Mmm,” Yibo mumbled as he raised Zhan’s hand to his lips.

”I made a promise to myself that day. That I’d take better care of myself. For your sake.”

”And for your own sake,” Yibo replied with a brighter smile this time.

”And for my own sake,” Zhan nodded in agreement.

”It’s going to be a long flight, ge...”

”Yeah...17 hours…,” Zhan sighed.

”We should get some rest.”

”Yeah…,” Zhan smiled. ”Greece...here we come!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ttxs croatia episode -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FOuRZwiF4Vk&t=3332s
> 
> Also, I did some youtubing and realized Yibo was not there for the 17th feb episode of TTXS. So using that in my timeline!


	74. Wanna join the mile high club?

* * *

When Yibo woke up, he found himself resting against Zhan, who seemed to be up and watching a movie on the screen in front of his seat.

”You’re up,” Zhan spoke softly. “Did I wake you?”

”No,” Yibo nodded and shook his head. “How much longer, ge?”

”5 more hours...you slept for 12 hours straight!” Zhan smiled.

”Wow...what about you?” 

”I woke up two hours back...just finishing this movie…”

”What do you normally do in flights?”

”I…,” Zhan grinned in embarrassment, “work.”

”You work?!”

”Yeah...memorize lines, go over the choreography videos, prepare for auditions or just read more about acting and filmmaking.”

”Wow,” Yibo gaped at him. 

”Sometimes I doodle and draw.”

”What do you want to do now?” Yibo shook his head in amusement.

Zhan put his earphones away and leaned in closer. He readjusted the blanket around them and then slid his hand inside with a grin.

”I want to do you,” Zhan held Yibo’s dick firmly.

Yibo choked as his eyes darted about frantically, making sure no one was watching.

”What say, sweetie? Wanna join the mile high club?”

”Ge…,” Yibo stuttered as Zhan massaged Yibo’s now erect dick through his pants. “I...ahhh,” Yibo moaned softly.

”I’ll take that as a yes. Come to the washroom in a few minutes. I have the...necessities with me,” Zhan smirked and winked as he pulled out two items from his bag.

Yibo blinked in astonishment as Zhan walked down the aisle to the bathroom at the end of the plane. He looked around nervously and shuffled in his seat, alternating between standing up and sitting back again several times. Finally, after several minutes, he took a deep breath and stood up. Carefully and as casually as possible he made his way to the back.

To his immense relief, there was no crew member in the back and bit his lips, partly in fear and partly in excited anticipation as he knocked gently. In the blink of an eye, the door slid open and a hand grabbed him by the collar, pulling him inside.

”Hi…,” Zhan smiled.

”Hey,” Yibo smiled nervously. “Ge...are we really…

”Don't you want to?” Zhan batted his eyelids innocently with a pout as he pushed Yibo back against the door, dangerously close to his face.

”Fuck,” Yibo muttered under his breath as Zhan’s lips lingered mere inches from his.

”I prepped myself for you, didi,” Zhan whispered seductively into Yibo’s ear before nibbling on it.

”Ah shittt,” Yibo’s breathing became heavier. 

"Let's make this quick, shall we?" Zhan growled in a low baritone.

He grabbed Yibo by his collar again and turned them around. He unzipped Yibo’s pants, yanked them down and pushed Yibo onto the seat. Slowly, Zhan took off his own pants and straddled a dazed Yibo. He rolled his hips against Yibo’s who let out a long moan as their erections rubbed against each other.

”Ge,” Yibo shuddered.

Zhan took Yibo’s lips in his and kissed him long and deep. Yibo began melting into the kiss and wrapped his arms tighter around Zhan’s waist, pulling him closer. Zhan moaned as Yibo began unbuttoning his shirt and planting kisses down his neck and chest. He managed to think straight for a few seconds and quickly reached for the lube and condom.

Zhan’s breath hitched as he slowly lowered himself on Yibo, sighing as he felt Yibo enter him until he was all the way in. Yibo gripped Zhan’s waist and closed his eyes, letting his head fall back as Zhan began moving on him, over and over. 

”You’re so hot,” Zhan murmured as he sucked on Yibo’s neck, riding him harder with every bite. 

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo muttered breathlessly, “faster...please…”

With a smirk Zhan began riding him faster until he was sweating and moaning, edging closer to his climax. Yibo’s grip on his waist hardened and he pushed him down more aggressively each time, chasing the high. They moaned against each other’s lips, breath hot and heavy, skin damp with perspiration, bodies burning with desire. 

”Yibo...fuck...I’m going to…”

”Me too, ge…”

With one final push down, Zhan began to moan louder but was immediately silenced by Yibo’s mouth crashing into his. He devoured Zhan’s lips as he reached his own climax a few seconds later. As they rode the high together, their kisses turned wetter and sloppier until they came back down and their bodies lay limp against each other.

”Fuck, Zhan-ge,” Yibo spoke finally. “That was fucking insane.”

Yeah,” Zhan nodded against Yibo’s shoulder. “I can check that off my list…,” he chuckled, still catching his breath.

”You have a list?” Yibo’s eyes widened.

”Mmm,” Zhan sat up with a shy grin. “I have a long list of things I want to do with you.”

”Ge!” Yibo blushed.

Zhan kissed Yibo’s cheek with a smile and then slowly stood up and got off Yibo. He pulled his pants back on and with a long exhale, helped Yibo stand up. 

”I’ll head out first,” Zhan placed a kiss on Yibo’s lips and nose.

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and kissed Zhan back, satisfied and happy.

”I love you,” Zhan smiled brightly before he exited the bathroom cautiously.

Yibo sighed and rested his head against the closed door, a huge smile on his face.

”I love you too,” he whispered.

* * *

A few hours later, their flight landed in Athens and they walked out of the airport, still cautious.

”I don't think anyone here will recognize us, ge,” Yibo said.

”We still have to be careful, didi,” Zhan. 

”Wait till you see the house I’ve booked for us. We’ll have it all to ourselves. And it’s outside the busy city so there won't be as many people around. I can walk hand in hand with you then,” Yibo smiled confidently.

”Sounds perfect,” Zhan’s expression softened.

”Yup...perfection is just a cab ride, two ferries, and another cab ride away!”

WHAT?!” Zhan exclaimed.

”Oh...yeah,” Yibo grinned nervously. “We’re going to one of the small islands off the coast.”

”Yibo! That’s so much more travel!”

”Sorry, ge! I just...thought it would be better...more privacy...and I can rent a bike and we can explore the entire island...and I chose it because it has such beautiful architecture...I thought you’d love it…”

Zhan’s irritation vanished immediately when he saw the sincerity on Yibo’s face. He slid closer to him and smiled at him affectionately.

”If you picked it so thoughtfully...I’ll take another 17 more hours of travel gladly,” Zhan hailed a cab, smiling.

"It's only five hours," Yibo grinned stupidly.

Yibo’s body relaxed and he leaned forward to hand the cab driver a piece of paper with the name of the place they needed to go to in order to catch the ferry. They sat side by side, thigh to thigh, as the cab zoomed through the city traffic and arrived at their destination an hour later. Zhan unloaded the bags as Yibo ran ahead to buy the ferry tickets. After much hand gesturing and map pointing, he finally managed to buy two tickets. He rushed back to help Zhan with the bags, beaming with pride as he waved the tickets at him.

”The next ferry is in five minutes. We got here just in time!”

”And then how much longer?” Zhan stretched his body.

”The map showed two hours on each ferry and then just ten minute to our house once we reach the island.”

”Hmm,” Zhan sighed and suppressed a yawn. “Alright, let’s board this ferry.”

”Sorry, ge,” Yibo looked down a little ashamed. 

”You have nothing to apologize for,” Zhan squeezed his arm. “I can't wait to see this island! And the house!”

”It’ll be our home for the next five days!”

”Be careful what you wish for! We’ve never stayed together for more than a day...you’ll probably get sick of me!”

”What are you saying?! We lived together during the shoot...for four whole months,” Yibo rolled his eyes as they walked.

”Yeah...but...I mean as a couple.”

”I was in love with you then and if it’s possible, I’m even more in love with you now. I will never get sick of you, ge.”

”So cheesy, Yibo!” Zhan giggled.

Only for you, ge,” Yibo smiled back and nudged Zhan’s shoulder with his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I know I made the airplane bathroom sex seem really easy and it's not but what the hell!
> 
> Also, for anyone who doesn't know, being in the 'mile high club' means you've had sex on a plane.


	75. You lucky too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm going to dedicate a few chapters to just this five day trip! Hope y'all enjoy reading them as much as I'm enjoying writing them. I've introduced some subplots here that I really like. Happy reading!

* * *

Zhan and Yibo sat by the window inside the ferry’s deck seating. They were too exhausted and sleepy to enjoy the ferry ride but they spent the hours alternating between talking about their childhood, their work, their family, and their many weird stories in the entertainment industry and sitting in tired silence.

_Even after all these months, we can still talk to each other about anything and everything. Even when we sit in silence, it’s not uncomfortable._ Zhan thought affectionately.

”Look!” Yibo pointed outside.

”Woah,” Zhan gasped as his eyes took in the sunset colors in the sky.

They were on the final stretch of the last ferry. Both their brains were mere minutes away from shutting down. They sat beside each other, Zhan by the window, shoulder to shoulder, occasionally nodding off. But now, the view that lay before them, woke them up for a little longer.

”It’s so beautiful,” Zhan whispered in wonder as he continued gazing at the sky.

"Yes, it is,” Yibo smiled fondly as his gaze rested on Zhan instead. “So beautiful.”

_Even after all these months, I can't believe Xiao Zhan entered my life and chose to be with me. He loves me. Unconditionally. He lets me be myself when I want to talk his head off and even when I want to sit quietly._ Yibo squeezed Zhan’s hand discreetly.

Zhan turned and smiled at Yibo, squeezing his hand back. In a few more minutes, their ferry docked and with a huge sigh of relief, they disembarked, bags in hand. They looked around but there was no taxi in sight.

”Let’s see if any of these buses go where the house is,” Yibo began walking towards the line of buses.

Zhan followed him sleepily and after checking with the first bus, they were told to board the one next to it. Much to Zhan’s joy, the bus ride only took ten minutes but he groaned again when they were told they had to walk up the cobbled road for another ten minutes to get to their cottage, as they were corrected when they said house.

”Come on, ge,” Yibo encouraged a pouty Zhan. “We’re almost there...and then we can sleep...on a nice comfortable bed!”

”Alright!” Zhan sighed, lured in by the image of a cozy bed awaiting him. “Let’s do this!”

They walked up the cobbled road and the slope wasn't as steep as it had looked from afar. They reached the cottage that was the last one in the line, almost secluded in its spot.

”Belvedere,” Zhan read the nameplate on the gate.

”It means a beautiful view according to the site,” Yibo pushed the gate open.

As soon as they walked the narrow path to the front door, it opened suddenly and a short smiling old woman walked out, beaming from ear to ear.

”Hello! You made it!” She spoke in a heavy accent, gesturing for them to follow her in cheerfully.

”Uhh...who is that, Bo-di?” Zhan froze to his spot.

”Must be the owner...she lives nearby...the site said she would greet us.”

”Come, come,” she waved at them, continuing to speak in broken english. “You must be tired!”

Yibo bowed with an awkward smile as he followed her inside. Zhan looked around curiously as he entered the house behind them. It was a small cozy cottage, a beautiful white and blue on the outside that looked warm and homely in the sunset. As Zhan walked further into the cottage, his eyes widened as he realized how similar it was to the kind of cottage he had once described to Yibo when he shared his dream of one day living in a quiet part of the world in a cute cottage and owning a small bakery.

”Bo-di...this is…,” Zhan began but when he looked ahead, Yibo and the lady were already upstairs.

He caught up with them hurriedly just in time to see the lady showing Yibo the balcony. It was a beautiful space with plants and a large cushioned swing. The whole balcony was lit up with twinkling lights and Zhan gasped once again as he realized why the cottage was given the name Belvedere. From where he stood, he could see the entire ocean laid out before them, in all its mysterious and majestic glory. They could see the town sloping down on the tiny but gorgeous island all around them. 

”Wow,” Zhan stood beside Yibo who was also lost in the scenery, “this is…”

”I know right...it’s perfect,” Yibo muttered in awe.

”You like?” The lady stood behind them, smiling kindly.

”Yes, very much,” Yibo replied in english and bowed once more.

”You Chinese?” She asked inquisitively.

”Yes,” Zhan took a step closer and offered her his hand.

”Ohh! I haven’t seen a Chinese since...several years ago…,” her voice grew sad but she recovered quickly. “So nice to have you here!” She shook his hand enthusiastically.

”Thank you,” Zhan grinned, also speaking in english.

”Come, I show you the room.”

They followed her back inside and down the narrow corridor.

”There are two bedrooms and one bathroom up here,” she narrated as she opened the door to each room. “Which room you like?”

”Umm…,” Zhan tapped his chin. “I think the one with the big window! What do you think?” He turned to Yibo.

”Fine by me, ge,” Yibo nodded along.

”You two...stay in same room?” The lady pointed her finger at Yibo then Zhan then Yibo again.

Zhan’s breath hitched as he noticed the change in her expression. He made up his mind and was about to reply when he felt a warm hand intertwine fingers with his.

”Yes, he is my boyfriend,” Yibo replied first.

Zhan froze but Yibo maintained a steady hold on his hand and steady eye contact with the old lady, who was still eyeing them with an unreadable expression. 

_Oh no!”_ Zhan panicked. _She’s going to kick us out!”_

He glanced at Yibo who continued to stare at her impassively with a hint of displeasure.

Slowly, a twinkle shone in her eyes and Zhan thought he was imagining things when he saw a tear slide down her cheek.

”Are you okay?” Zhan blurted out abruptly, concerned that they had somehow upset her. 

”Yes,” she wiped her tears, smiling. “I am the okay.”

”Why are you crying? Is it because we are gay?” Yibo spoke a little too harshly.

”Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed. “Be nicer.”

”No...no,” she took a step towards them, “you misunderstand. I...the last time I met a chinese...fifty years ago almost...she came here for a holiday and we fell in love...but her family say no...did not accept us...they took her away...back home...far away,” she teared up again.

Zhan and Yibo stood still and silent. They couldn't believe the words that they were hearing.

”It’s nice to know that things are changing…,” she continued, “...that you two are together...and happy,” she reached out for their hands that were still intertwined together. “I’m happy someone from China has happy ending.”

Zhan felt his eyes burn and on an impulse, he left Yibo’s hand and leaned forward to give the lady a hug. He wrapped his arm around and gently massaged her back as she returned his hug.

”I’m sorry…I wish I could say things were different now in China, but they’re at least getting better...I’m sorry you had to separate from your love…,” Zhan let his tears flow freely, overcome with emotion.

”Ahh,” she shook her head chuckling and wiped her tears, “look at me going on making you sad,” she patted his chest. “I am happy now...you meet my wife tomorrow. I found love again…,” she smiled brightly. “I am lucky.”

”That’s wonderful…,” Zhan wiped his own tears.

Zhan turned around to see, much to his shock, Yibo’s tear stained face. 

”Bo-di!” Zhan turned Yibo towards him by the arm and cupped his face. “Are you okay?”

”I’m lucky…,” Yibo uttered almost inaudibly.

”Yes, you lucky too,” she walked over to Yibo and patted his arm. “You get happy ending with first love.”

"How can you tell we are each other's first love?" Zhan raised an eyebrow at the grinning woman.

"I can tell...it's written all over your faces," she smirked.

Zhan’s face softened and he gently wiped the tears from Yibo’s cheeks.

”I’m lucky too…” He leaned forward and placed a kiss on each cheek.

”Alright, you two,” the lady shook her head chuckling. “I go now. I live in next house. Knock on door if you need anything.”

With those words, she left Zhan and Yibo standing on the balcony, gazing into each other’s eyes. Zhan pulled Yibo into an embrace and placed kisses along his shoulder and neck. He felt Yibo tighten his arms around his waist and take in a deep breath.

”I love you, Wang Yibo,” Zhan murmured softly.

”I love you more, Zhan-ge,” Yibo’s voice trembled.

”Not possible,” Zhan smiled as they swayed as one in the silent breeze.


	76. I can't wait for tomorrow

* * *

”How about we go inside, didi?” Zhan whispered softly as Yibo clung to him. “We should freshen up.”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded but didn't let go of Zhan.

”Sweetie,” Zhan chuckled and tried pulling away, only to be held tighter. “Come on, Bo-di.”

Zhan finally managed to peel Yibo off him long enough to walk into the room but as soon as they were inside, Yibo hugged him from behind and wrapped himself around Zhan once more.

”Do you like the place, ge?” Yibo’s voice finally seemed steady and happy again.

”I love it!” Zhan kissed Yibo’s arm. “It’s funny...it’s just how I imagined my cottage would look like when I open my own bakery someday,” Zhan giggled.

”Yes!” Yibo let go and punched a fist in the air in celebration.

”Wha...what are you jumping for?” Zhan looked at him bewildered.

”I got it right!” Yibo beamed. “It took me so long to find a place like the one you had described but I found it! Totally worth it! You really like it, ge? It will look even better in the bright daylight tomorrow.” Yibo rambled as he bounced around in front of Zhan excitedly.

Zhan stared at him in disbelief. He was at a loss for words and could only stand there, dumbstruck and still. 

”Ge?” A concerned Yibo shook Zhan by the arm. “You do like it, right?”

”I...I…,” Zhan stuttered. “You did this? For me?” He finally found his voice.

”Did what? Find this place?”

Zhan nodded slowly.

”Of course, ge,” Yibo smiled as if it was no big deal.

”Yibo…,” Zhan muttered but then fumbled for words once more.

”What is it, ge? You look upset...do you not like the cottage?” Yibo looked nervous.

”I love it,” Zhan felt himself tearing up again. “It’s just...no one has done something so sweet for me. You remembered everything including the arched doorways! I can't even imagine how long it must have taken you to find this place,” Zhan wiped his tears with a smile.

”Hey,” Yibo rushed forward and took Zhan in his arms. “Why are you crying?”

”I don't know,” Zhan chuckled. “That lady’s story really got to me, I guess. And then I find out my boyfriend went through all this trouble to get me the cottage of my dreams. And I’m so tired and jetlagged!” Zhan pouted as more tears rolled down his face.

Yibo laughed out loud and guided Zhan into the embrace, kissing his forehead.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo quietened down but a wide smile remained on his face, “It was totally worth it. I love you and this is our first trip together. I want to make it as special for you as I possibly can. So stop crying and let’s freshen up. We both need to rest!”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded and let out a long exhale. “You’re right. But thank you, didi. This means a lot.”

”No need to thank me, ge. But there is one thing you can do to thank me if you want.”

”What?” Zhan rubbed his eye as he suppressed a yawn.

”We haven't kissed yet, ge,” Yibo pouted.

”Oh, sorry...it was just...the flight then the ferries and then that old lady’s story and…,” Zhan rambled but was cut off mid sentence as a set of soft lips enveloped his.

”You talk too much,” Yibo whispered when he pulled back for a brief second before deepening the kiss.

Zhan smiled in satisfaction as they kissed for several seconds, pouring all their emotions into the kiss. All the yearning, the excitement, the joy, the love, the exhaustion, the desire, the gratitude, everything blended together as they sunk into each other’s arms and tasted each other. 

When they finally pulled apart, lips wet and shiny, Zhan sighed against Yibo’s lips.

”Alright, now I really need to sleep.” Zhan pulled back and suppressed yet another yawn.

”Let’s take a quick shower,” Yibo smiled affectionately and led Zhan by the hand.

When they were done bathing together, Yibo led an even sleepier Zhan to their cozy bed. They got in silently and Yibo adjusted the lamp light as Zhan undid the bedding and slipped in with a long, satisfied yawn.

”Come here,” Zhan gave Yibo a sleepy smile.

Yibo snuggled closer to Zhan and they fit together like the perfect puzzle.

”Goodnight, didi,” Zhan closed his eyes, happy to finally be in a comfortable bed with the love of his life in his arms.

It felt like they were in an alternate reality starting a new life together, far far away in a place where no one knew them..

_I could get used to this._ Zhan thought. _One day, maybe I could open that bakery and live in a little cottage and have Yibo in my arms just like this._

__

”Goodnight, ge,” Yibo began drifting off. “I can't wait for tomorrow.”

__

”Neither can I,” Zhan kissed his forehead and within seconds, they were both fast asleep.

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a filler chapter. More coming soon!


	77. This is my asteri

* * *

When Yibo woke up, it was 11 am and Zhan was not in bed with him. He noticed the curtains were drawn so that the bright daylight wouldn’t blind him as he woke up. Yibo smiled as he remembered how Zhan would do the same thing when they stayed together during the Untamed.

_He’s always so caring and thoughtful._

Eventually when Zhan did not return, Yibo sat up and stretched. He got out of bed and quickly freshened up. He walked around the house, on the balcony, and then went downstairs but still couldn't find Zhan.

”Zhan-ge?” he called out but still got no response.

Yibo hurriedly put on his slippers and stepped outside and was about to walk over to the gate when he heard Zhan’s laugh coming from the house next to theirs, just across the fence. He glanced over in the direction and saw Zhan standing with two people.

Yibo recognized the owner from the previous night as he made his way over the fence towards them. He didn't know who the other woman was but given her age, he guessed it was the wife the old lady told them about last night.

_Are they really married to each other? Is that even...a real thing?! Can Zhan-ge and I get married one day?_

Yibo tripped and fell as he got flustered at the thought that crossed his mind unexpectedly.

”Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed as he ran over. “Are you hurt?!”

Zhan helped a bewildered and embarrassed Yibo up. He noticed the flushed face and red ears and looked at Yibo, confused.

”Are you okay, Bo-di?” Zhan bent down to check Yibo’s knees.

”I’’m...I’m fine, ge,” Yibo cleared his throat and dusted himself off.

”Are you sure? You’ve got some scratches. What happened? How did you fall, didi?” Zhan frowned as he led Yibo and sat him down at the table the two women were at.

”I’m sure, ge,” Yibo stopped Zhan from fussing over him by holding his hands away from his knee. “Really. I just...I didn't notice...that rock,” Yibo pointed at a random stone.

”Goodmorning, Eebo,” the owner smiled at him. “Strong boy don't get hurt, Zan-Zan,” she chuckled at Zhan.

Yibo gaped at her and then at Zhan who chuckled along and handed Yibo some juice.

”You finally got it right, granny!” Zhan nodded in approval.

”Granny?” Yibo choked on the juice.

”We went grocery shopping in the morning and she told me to call her granny,” Zhan smiled at him softly. “Oh! And this is her wife,” Zhan eyed Yibo excitedly.

”Granny, this is _my_ asteri,” Zhan grinned at the other woman.

”Nice to meet you,” the woman smiled kindly at Yibo who stood up and bowed to her, shaking her hand. “Zan-Zan has been telling us about you all morning.”

”Nice to meet you too,” Yibo smiled awkwardly and then glanced at Zhan. “Asteri?”

”It means star,” the owner lady interrupted with a bright smile. “You are his star. Like she is my star.”

With that the old lady wrapped her arm around her wife and planted a kiss on her temple.

Yibo blushed as Zhan giggled and did the same to him.

”Come come, have breakfast you two,” the owner chuckled and led them inside.

”How long have you been up?” Yibo whispered as they followed the women in. “You seem like you all have known each other for years!”

”I spent almost three hours with them grocery shopping and cooking,” Zhan grinned.

”Oh, sorry I overslept,” Yibo smiled, embarrassed. 

”Hey,” Zhan stopped Yibo by the elbow and pulled him closer. “Goodmorning,” he smiled and placed a kiss on his lips.

”Ge!” Yibo’s eyes widened. “What happened to being cautious and careful?”

”I feel free here,” Zhan sighed and took Yibo by the hand as he began walking once again. “I feel like we belong here. We are safe here. We don't need to hide here.”

Yibo’s face softened when he saw the contentment and happiness on Zhan’s face. He squeezed Zhan’s hand tighter as they made their way to the breakfast laid out on the dining table in the warm and inviting home.

* * *

”So what do you wanna do today?” Zhan sat back after they were done eating.

”I want to rent a bike and ride around the island,” Yibo grinned. “You?”

”Let’s do that!” Zhan shook his head, amused.

”We can see the beautiful buildings and stuff,” Yibo smiled wider. “You like that, right?”

”Yes,” Zhan chuckled. “I like buildings and stuff.”

”You know what I mean, ge,” Yibo pouted. “I mean architecture.”

Zhan laughed out loud and pinched Yibo’s nose gently.

”You go on bike?” The owner returned from the kitchen and sat beside Yibo. “I have bike.”

”You do?” Yibo looked at her in disbelief.

"Our son’s old bike...motorbike,” she nodded sincerely. “You can use.”

”How do you have a son?” Yibo blurted.

”Yibo!!!!” Zhan whacked his arm.

”Adopted,” the owner burst into laughter at Yibo’s innocent bluntness.

”Oh sorry,” Yibo rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Can I see the bike, please?”

”Come, come,” she gestured to him to follow.

Yibo gasped when he saw the well maintained bike. It was old but in great condition.

”Our son’s friend come fix it to keep it in shape. You can ride...better than it just sitting here!”

”It’s beautiful,” Yibo exclaimed as he walked around the bike. “Are you sure?”

”Yes, yes,” the other woman smiled and gestured at the bike. “Enjoy!”

”Oh wow! Thank you!” Yibo sat on the bike with a wide smile and caressed it like the most precious thing ever.

”Wow,” Zhan pursed his lips and raised an eyebrow. “Never thought I’d be jealous of a bike!”

”Come here,” Yibo giggled and stretched his hand out.

He got off the bike and helped Zhan sit on it instead.

”Tell me that doesn’t feel good,” Yibo adjusted Zhan’s body till he was sitting comfortably on it.

”I’d rather be riding something else,” he whispered.

Yibo coughed and blushed as he stole a glance at the women. Thankfully, Zhan had spoken in Chinese and they remained smiling, clueless to what Zhan had just implied. 

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo punched his shoulder lightly. “What do you think of sitting behind me while I ride us around the island?” He recovered quickly from his embarrassment and winked.

The image of him plastered against Yibo as they zoomed down the beautiful coast appealed to Zhan very much. So much that he could feel the enjoyment in his body, specifically in the region down low. He bit his lip and got off the bike.

”That sounds good...how about we go get ready first?” He muttered quickly before bowing to the women and thanking them again as he led Yibo out by his hand.

”Why such a rush, ge?” Yibo asked as they hurried to their cottage.

As soon as they closed the door behind them, Zhan pinned him to the wall and kissed him furiously.

”Because I want you to ride me before you ride that bike,” Zhan let out a growl and bit Yibo’s lower lip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I don't know any greek. Just did some research online. My reference for the term of endearment -
> 
> https://www.quora.com/What-are-some-Greek-terms-of-endearment
> 
> Also, if you found me through Twitter, let me know!!!
> 
> And if are on Twitter and didn't know I am, hmu!
> 
> @jalpari_yizhan


	78. We need a safe word

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not the best M/M smut writer out there but hopefully it's still enjoyable!

* * *

Yibo smirked and turned them around, pressing against Zhan, backing him into the door. Their lips massaged each other and the kiss deepened as their hands roamed every inch of each other’s body. 

Zhan walked Yibo back all the way to the couch. He tore off their clothes and within seconds pushed Yibo onto the couch on all fours.

”Wow, no foreplay, huh?” Yibo grinned like a brat, batting his eyelids.

”I don't see any need for that,” Zhan bent over Yibo and grabbed his already hard dick, massaging it not so gently. 

Yibo groaned and dropped his head onto the back of the couch, clutching the fabric as Zhan stroked him harder.

”Ge!” Yibo whined when Zhan pulled away.

”I’m not going anywhere, sweetie...need to get you prepped though now don't I?” Zhan smirked as he spread lube on his fingers and slowly inserted one into Yibo’s opening.

”Ahh,” Yibo moaned as Zhan worked him quickly and inserted a second finger, slowing down his pace a little to scissor him open.

”You’re so...ahh...impatient,” Yibo groaned as Zhan increased his pace again.

”Do you want me to slow down?” Zhan’s voice was laced with some concern.

”No...no…,” Yibo breathed hard and shook his head.

”That’s my good didi,” Zhan’s smirked returned and he plastered his chest to Yibo’s back as he began inserting both fingers in harder and faster.

Zhan kissed Yibo’s back and shoulders rough and hard as his fingers moved at a brutal pace on finding Yibo’s spot. 

”You open up for me so good, didi,” Zhan whispered seductively. “So ready to take me…”

”Always, ge,” Yibo managed to stutter. “Always want you inside me…”

”You like this?” Zhan growled in a low voice as he pulled his fingers out and rushed them in without mercy.

”Ahhh...yes,” Yibo exclaimed in a voice that was a mix of pleasure and pain.

”You think you can take me now, didi?” Zhan asked, his voice dripping with impatience and desperation. “Fuck, Bo-di...say yes…”

”Yes, ge. Yes...yes,” Yibo sighed as Zhan pulled his fingers out and lined his painfully hard dick with Yibo’s opening, almost pushing it in a few times, teasing.

He then pulled Yibo up and turned him around for a kiss, lapping up all his wet breaths and helpless moans as he rubbed Yibo’s erection. After a few seconds, Zhan sat down on the couch and spread his legs and eyed Yibo.

”Come here,” Zhan instructed, pointing to his lap and he gripped Yibo’s waist as Yibo slowly lowered himself on Zhan’s dick.

”Fuck…,” Yibo let out a small sigh as his hands gripped Zhan’s shoulders tightly.

Zhan rested his head against the back of the couch and closed his eyes, focusing all his attention on the sensation of Yibo enclosing his erection. He thrust his hips up every now and then to help Yibo adjust to the angle. 

”Ge…,” Yibo leaned forward and took Zhan’s lips in his.

Zhan sat up straight again and held Yibo by his hair as he deepened the kiss. His other hand slid around Yibo’s waist and pulled him closer carefully until their bodies were sweaty and pressed against each other.

”Move,” Zhan instructed again and Yibo’s eyes darkened at the authority in his voice.

”I love it when you tell me what to do,” Yibo whispered as he began moving, lifting himself up on his knees over and over.

”Well then,” Zhan pulled Yibo’s head back by grabbing his hair, “move faster otherwise I’ll have to punish you.”

”Punish me,” Yibo’s lips parted as his breathing became heavier.

Yibo jumped the next moment as Zhan’s hand smacked down on his ass, in one swift rapid movement. 

”Move,” Zhan’s voice became deeper and he groped Yibo’s ass, kneading into it painfully hard.

”Ahhh...uhhmmm,” Yibo moaned and began moving faster, head resting in the crook of Zhan’s neck. “Ge...I...I need it again.”

Zhan smirked and raised his hand again, coming down even harder on Yibo’s ass. He clawed into Yibo’s back with the other hand as he started thrusting up into Yibo. Yibo licked Zhan’s chest and played with his nipple drawing a husky moan from Zhan.

”Fuck...Yibo...do you know how hot you are...it drives me crazy,” Zhan panted as he began thrusting harder in sync with Yibo who was now riding him faster.

”Show me how crazy,” Yibo bit Zhan’s ear.

Zhan pulled Yibo’s head back and stared at him for a few seconds, his eyes darkening. In the blink of an eye, Yibo found himself being yanked off and turned around once again landing on the couch on all fours. Zhan, giving him no time to regain his balance, guided his erection into Yibo with one continuous, unhesitant push. 

Yibo’s entire body lurched forward and he let out a scream. Zhan held Yibo’s hip with both hands for leverage and began ramming into him in an unstoppable rhythm. All Zhan wanted to do was fill Yibo up till he couldn't stand on his own. He grunted as he began jacking Yibo off in time with his thrusts.

”Can you tell how crazy you make me now?” Zhan leaned forward and bit Yibo’s back.

”Ahh, yes...yes, ge,” Yibo begged for some mercy. “Slow down, ge…”

”Too late for that,” Zhan grinned as he noticed the pleasure on Yibo’s face. “I’m gonna wreck you.”

”Wreck me…,” Yibo whispered as his head fell against the couch, having no more strength to support himself up.

Zhan tightened his grip on Yibo and rammed into him one final time, letting out a deep grunt as he climaxed. He bent over, weak in the knees and soon they were laying flat against the couch, Yibo trembling under an equally spent Zhan.

Yibo felt his own cum spreading on the couch and he turned his to one side and after managing to catch his breath, spoke with a grin.

”We better clean this couch,” he sighed.

”I can't move…” Zhan placed lazy kisses down Yibo’s back.

” _You_ can't move? I’m the one who’s going to need crutches after this!”

”Sorry, sweetie,” Zhan let out a short chuckle and kissed Yibo’s ass. After a few more minutes of massaging and kissing the now red cheeks, he stood up and tied the condom. He offered Yibo a hand but Yibo shook his head indicating that he was going to stay on the couch a while longer.

Zhan smiled and went off to clean himself and bring towels to clean the couch and Yibo. He knelt next to the couch and lovingly, began wiping Yibo’s ass with the cool wet towel. He carefully spread Yibo’s legs and began cleaning the opening that was still wet and sticky with lube when Yibo clenched it shut.

”Ge! What’re you doing? I ...I can do it myself,” Yibo flustered and Zhan could see how embarrassed he was by the intimate action.

”I want to clean you, didi. You need more time to recover. Don't feel conscious...there’s no need to hide…,” Zhan leaned forward and kissed Yibo softly and gently. “I love you, sweetie.”

Yibo hesitated and then, having no more strength to protest, lay back down and tried to relax his body as Zhan resumed his self appointed task. He very carefully and methodically cleaned Yibo. When he was satisfied he helped Yibo up and began cleaning the couch.

”Well,” Zhan stretched his back when done, “this has gotta do, I guess. Can't do better,” he rubbed the back of his neck with a grin. 

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo stretched his hands out towards Zhan, “come shower with me.”

Yibo pulled Zhan closer to him and hugged him, pressing closer to the damp sticky body. He took in Zhan’s scent and revelled in the familiar comfort. 

”Are you okay?” Zhan caressed his back.

”Hmmm…”

”Can you ride the bike still?” Zhan chuckled.

”I think so,” Yibo pulled back and chuckled as well. “Maybe after a short nap…”

”Was it good for you?”

”Mmm,” Yibo purred. “So good! But…”

”But what?” Zhan asked nervously, pushing aside some strands of hair from Yibo’s face.

”We need a safe word next time…,” Yibo winked.

”Oh no,” Zhan covered his face, “I knew it...I hurt you…”

”No, sweetheart,” Yibo pulled Zhan’s hands away from his face. “But if this is any indication of your _list_ , then I think for the sake of my ass, we need a safe word.”

Zhan groaned as a cackling Yibo led him into the shower.


	79. We finally made it!

* * *

When Zhan stepped out of the house, satiated and radiant, Yibo was walking the bike out to their front gate. Zhan noticed the slight limp in Yibo’s movements but relaxed when Yibo smiled at him and shook his head discreetly. 

They waved at the ladies who stood at the fence, smiling at them fondly. Yibo kicked the stand off and sat on the bike, holding two helmets. He helped Zhan put his on, strapping it into place affectionately as Zhan fumbled with it.

”Just put one leg around, ge. Should be easy with your skyscraper legs!” Yibo teased.

”Shut up! I have ridden with you once before,” Zhan pinched his sides with a grin and adjusted himself till he was comfortable and then nodded.

”Make sure you hold on to me tight, ge! And stay as close as possible,” Yibo instructed in all seriousness.

”Like this?” Zhan smirked as he slid closer and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s waist.

”Yep. Just like that,” Yibo licked his lips and turned his face sideways to wink at Zhan.

”If this is how someone has to sit on your bike, you’re not giving anyone else a ride,” Zhan dug his fingers into Yibo.

”Ow,” Yibo chuckled. “Okay, okay...I don't like giving people rides anyway.”

”Really?”

”Except for you, ge. You’re always my exception,” Yibo raised Zhan’s hand to his lips and kissed it.

With one final wave to the women, Yibo put on his helmet and the bike came alive under them. With a smooth kick and flick of his wrist, they began moving, carefully at first as Yibo got used to the old bike.

They navigated slowly through the cobbled road as they made their way down to the main road. Once on it, Yibo roared the engine and they took off. Zhan felt his entire body stiffen at the sensation but when he felt Yibo’s hand pat his and pull him closer, he relaxed and began enjoying the thrill.

Once out of the town area, they stopped at the side of the road to enjoy the fresh air as they made a plan. Zhan got busy clicking photos of the entire town and the water that was mere feet away from them. The day was bright and sunny and it felt great to be out without a mask and a whole crowd of staff and fans following their every move.

”The owner said it’s a small island so everything is a short ride away. Can we do a ride along the coast before we stop at places?” Yibo asked hopefully.

”Whatever you want,” Zhan smiled and walked back to Yibo, who stood leaning against the bike.

”Let’s get a photo of us first...with the town in the background along with the water, okay?” Zhan stood between Yibo’s legs and played with his collar.

”Hmm,” Yibo felt himself glance around on reflex.

”It’s okay, didi,” Zhan murmured. “No one here knows us and it’s very common to see gay couples here. No one cares if I do this.”

Zhan leaned forward and placed a kiss on Yibo’s cheek, much to the boy’s astonishment. He then proceeded to place another kiss on his other cheek and then his nose and chin. Zhan placed Yibo’s hand on his waist as he leaned in once more and sealed his lips on Yibo’s. 

They stayed in the kiss for several seconds, gently playing with each other’s lips and holding each other close until Zhan finally broke the kiss, eliciting a soft whine from Yibo.

”Come on,” Zhan chuckled.

They stood against the bike, Yibo leaning against it and Zhan between his legs, back to Yibo’s chest. Yibo pulled Zhan closer and nuzzled their cheeks together as Zhan moved the camera around to capture the scenery behind them perfectly.

”Ready?” Zhan spoke when he was satisfied with the framing. “I’ll take a couple. And don’t give your supermodel looks here, okay? Smile...say cheese!!”

Yibo grinned at the instructions and Zhan clicked away capturing the beautiful smile that got wider as he cuddled closer. 

”Let’s make some ugly silly faces!” Zhan exclaimed and Yibo obliged.

”One last one! And then off we go on our adventure!” Zhan beamed.

As he was about to click, Yibo turned his face sideways and planted a kiss on Zhan’s cheek, inadvertently drawing a surprised smile from Zhan’s face at the unexpected gesture. 

”That’s my favorite one,” Yibo grinned as he saw the photo of Zhan’s eyebrows raised, a bright open smile on his face showing his bunny teeth and a soft kiss being placed on his cheek by Yibo who was smiling as well, eyes closed, arms around Zhan.

”Mine too,” Zhan smiled shyly and then they set off once more, the wind against their skin, and the vast endless blue surrounding them.

* * *

Forty five minutes later, Yibo finally stopped.

”This looks like a good beach,” Zhan looked around as he dismounted. “Look! There’s a bar too.”

”Perfect, just what I need after the long ride. A beer and some sun and sand. And,” Yibo pulled Zhan’s helmet off after removing his own. “...my boyfriend in my arms.”

He pulled Zhan in for a quick kiss and wrapped his arms around it in a gentle embrace.

”Mmm,” Zhan hummed. “Sounds perfect to me too.”

They made their way to the beach. It was perfect indeed. Not too crowded, The water was beautiful shades of green and blue. The bright blue endless sky stretched all above them. A shack on one side right at the water. Zhan and Yibo were wearing loose shirts and shorts and they were glad that they hadn't worn pants because the sun was warm and bright. 

Yibo put on his cap and grabbed Zhan’s hand in his as they made way on the sand towards the water. 

”Wow,” Zhan cooed as he whipped out his phone and began clicking away once more. 

”Go stand there, didi,” Zhan pointed to the water and Yibo obliged with a smile, although a little embarrassed.

He indulged Zhan’s every wish and they spent a good fifteen minutes taking photos of the big rocks in the water, the gentle waves lapping at the sand, the bright sky and sand that enveloped them. They took boomerangs of their feet getting drenched by the incoming waves, of their toes wiggling in the wet sand, of themselves together as Yibo placed more kisses on Zhan’s cheek.

”Okay, ge. I need a beer!” Yibo finally yanked Zhan’s arm in the direction of the shack.

”Welcome to Ftelia beach!!” A bright eyed waitress welcomed Zhan and Yibo as they entered the colorful and vibrant space.

”Hello,” Zhan smiled back and bowed followed by Yibo.

”Oh...international guests!” She clapped her hands together. “Where are you from?! Come in!”

”China,” Yibo grinned and followed her to the bar.

They sat on the high bar stools that spun around freely and turned to face the beach view, resting their arms on the bar counter behind them. Always in sync.

”What would you like?” The waitress returned to her spot behind the bar.

”Two beers,” Zhan replied.

”Here you go,” she filled up two big mugs from the tap in front of her and handed them the drinks. “Anything else?”

”That’s it for now,” Zhan bowed slightly and with a long exhale, raised his mug to Yibo’s and clinked them together. “Cheers, didi. We finally made it to Greece...our first vacation together.”

”Yeah, we finally made it,” he whispered looking deep into Zhan’s eyes, his face expressing something more than just the joy of being at a bar in Greece.


	80. For the rest of eternity

* * *

Slowly as the afternoon progressed, a few more people trickled in. A group of young friends that sat at the far end of the shack and an older couple that sat on the benches outside.

”I’m going to use the bathroom real quick,” Yibo stood up and left.

Zhan nodded and ordered another beer for himself and sighed, leaning back, enjoying the view. Light music played and pleasant chatter and laughter filled the air. Zhan sipped his drink slowly, enjoying the freshness.

”Hi there,” a voice interrupted him. 

Zhan turned to see a young man, probably in his late twenties too, smiling at Zhan with an arm extended out. Zhan placed his drink down, a little flustered by the sudden intrusion, and shook the man’s hand with a small smile.

”Hello…,” Zhan stood up and bowed as he shook hands.

”I’m David, what’s your name?” The man took the seat beside Zhan. 

”I’m Sean,” Zhan smiled back, choosing to give his English name instead of his real one.

”Nice to meet you, Sean. Are you just visiting Mykonos?” 

”Yes, I am...with…,”

”I would love to show you around!” David exclaimed before Zhan could finish his sentence.

”Ohh...umm...I think…”

”Maybe,” the man seemed to hesitate and his smile turned shy. “Maybe I could take you out to dinner tonight?”

”Huh?” Zhan’s eyes opened wide as it dawned on him that he was being asked out by a complete stranger.

”I know a really good restaurant nearby,” David continued. “We could…”

”That’s my seat,” a deep voice interrupted from behind David.

David turned around to see a glowering face staring at him with dark eyes.

”Oh! Is it? I’m sorry!” David smiled. “Why don’t you sit here?” He patted the seat on the other side of him. “I was just having a conversation with this gentleman here, if you don't mind.”

”That’s my boyfriend,” Yibo clenched his teeth and walked over to Zhan, draping an arm around him and pulling him close to his side.

Zhan rolled his lips inwards to suppress a chuckle and raised his hand to massage Yibo’s back to calm him down.

”David...this is Yibo,” Zhan smiled and looked up at Yibo fondly, as Yibo was still glaring at the man.

”Oh..uhh,” David scrambled off the stool and rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “I’m sorry...I didn't know...nice to meet you,” he recovered a little and extended his hand to Yibo.

Yibo didn't budge but only pulled Zhan closer.

”Yibo, behave.” Zhan whispered in Chinese.

With a huff, Yibo shook David’s hand briefly.

”I...I’ll get back to my friends now,” David smiled, still stuttering, as he stood up and waved at them and made his way back to the group of friends at the other end of the bar.

”Wow, that was…,” Zhan chuckled.

”I leave you for one second and someone’s already hitting on you,” Yibo glared at the man who was now seated with his back to them.

”Actually...he didn't just hit on me...he asked me out,” Zhan grinned.

”What?!?!” Yibo stood up again. “I’m going to show him…,” he grunted as he began walking to their table.

”Ayaa...calm down, sweetie,” Zhan caught him by the arm and pulled him closer until he was standing between Zhan’s legs.

Zhan placed a kiss on Yibo’s frowning lips.

”My baby lion.” He spoke softly.

”I’m not a baby.”

”No, you’re not...at least not in bed,” Zhan smirked and pulled Yibo in for a kiss.

Yibo blushed despite his anger.

”’I’m going to put a sign on you that says taken,” Yibo muttered grumpily as he sat back down after a few more seconds.

Zhan laughed heartily and pulled his cheeks. Yibo grinned at the beautiful laughing face and held Zhan’s hand up to his lips, placing a kiss on his delicate fingers.

_One day, I’m going to put a ring on this hand._ Yibo’s mind thought automatically.

This time, Yibo didn't choke on his thoughts. This time, he felt a warmth flowing through his body, spreading from his hand that was holding Zhan’s to his heart. This time, Yibo imagined Zhan and him standing hand in hand facing each other, proclaiming their love for each other and promising their life and loyalty to each other for the rest of eternity.

Zhan, clueless about Yibo’s current thoughts, resumed drinking and pulled out his phone taking a snap of Yibo.

”You look beautiful right now...like you’re really happy. I love that look on your face.”

”Come on, ge. Let’s get out of here...there’s more to see...plus that guy keeps glancing here. Moron,” Yibo stuck his tongue out with a frown.

Zhan downed his beer and shook his head, amused.

”Let’s go!”

* * *

As they rode around more, Yibo felt a tap on his shoulder. He stopped the bike off the road and lifted his vizer. Zhan did the same and pointed to something up the hill in the distance.

”Look...that looks like a really pretty church...can we go there?”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded, eyeing the structure at the top of the hill.

In another twenty minutes, they reached the top and parked in a small opening on the side of the road. They walked the remaining distance and Zhan gasped as he saw the white and blue building with stone floors and a wonderful view of the ocean. They looked around and saw no one. Curious, they walked around the church as Zhan clicked more photos. They entered the church and found themselves in a small room with a humble altar and a few wooden benches inside.

Yibo followed Zhan as he sat on one of the benches in silence, admiring the paintings and stained glass windows.

_I was always unsure if there was a higher power. I still don't know what you are like, if you look like us, if you created us...but what I do know is some universal energy out in the cosmic void has brought Yibo to me. And for that I am eternally grateful._ Zhan held Yibo’s hand. _I will never let this blessing go. I will stay by his side for the rest of eternity. No matter what._

Yibo squeezed his hand and gave Zhan a loving smile. They sat there for some more time, quiet and lost in their own thoughts. 


	81. Quick, make a wish!

* * *

Eventually, they walked out and got back on the bike. Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo and rested his head against his back. Yibo started the bike and this time, rode gently and at a leisurely pace down the winding road and back towards the opposite coast from where they began.

At one intersection, he saw a sign for a lighthouse and paused to ask Zhan.

”Yeah,” Zhan replied enthusiastically. “It’s almost sunset...it should be gorgeous!”

They made their way to the spot and when they reached, a beautiful sight awaited them. A small yet majestic lighthouse standing proudly and serenely against the changing sky.

”Armenistis Lighthouse,” Zhan fumbled as he read the sign. “These people spell their names one way and say it in a whole different way!” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

Yibo chuckled and they walked up the steps hand in hand. As they approached the top, the sun began its descent. The colors began blending and soon they were surrounded by shades of purple, pink, yellow and orange with a dash of red.

Yibo sighed and leaned against the railing, in complete awe of the view. Zhan walked around the deck in a full circle admiring every angle and perspective the lighthouse offered them. When he came back to Yibo, he saw him standing against the railing lost in thought.

Zhan stood behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist. Yibo turned to face him with a small smile. Zhan kissed his cheek and then let him rest his head against Zhan’s chest.

”What are you thinking, Bo-di?”

_I’m thinking about how I want you in my life forever._ Yibo thought to himself. _I’m thinking about how I want to marry you and have a family with you and love you in each and every lifetime._ Yibo sighed.

”Bo-di?” Zhan looked down at the smiling face when Yibo made no response.

”Nothing in particular,” Yibo said softly. “Just enjoying this moment, With you.”

Zhan felt his heart flutter at the simplicity of Yibo’s words and they spent the rest of the sunset swaying together, Zhan tightening his embrace around Yibo as the night air started cooling down. When the sun had disappeared and the stars had taken over the night sky, Zhan looked up and smiled. 

”Look,” Zhan whispered, “our two lonely stars...they’re still together.”

”Hmm.” Yibo nodded and gazed at them. “They’ll always be together. Right, ge?”

Zhan swallowed his emotions as he heard the vulnerability in Yibo’s voice. He placed his hand on Yibo’s cheek and turned him to face him once more.

”Always. I promise.” Zhan rubbed their noses together with a loving smile.

Yibo reached up and pulled Zhan’s face closer, enveloping his lips. He let the night shroud them in darkness as clouds began diminishing the moon’s light. He continued kissing the soft lips that were exploring his. 

"Ge?"

”Hmm?”

”For once, I don't feel scared of the dark.”

”Good,” Zhan planted kisses on Yibo’s shoulder and neck and cheek. “I’m right here.”

Yibo smiled and looked up at the sky. Just then, he noticed a shiny streak light up the sky.

”Look! Is that a shooting star!” Yibo exclaimed.

”Wow,” Zhan gasped as he followed Yibo’s finger. “Yeah, I think so!! Quick...make a wish!”

They closed their eyes and let their hearts do the rest.

* * *

When they got back home, Zhan and Yibo could feel the effects of their jetlag settling in once more. They had fought the drowsiness earlier but now they were ready to pass out. As soon as they reached the room, they didn't bother with changing or showering or even eating. The crawled into bed and pretty soon were fast asleep.

The next morning, Zhan opened his eyes unwillingly and immediately felt a warmth clinging to his body. He smiled when he turned his head and saw Yibo draped against him, breathing gently against his neck. 

Zhan turned towards Yibo and wrapped his arms around him, pulling him closer into the embrace. Yibo, now half awake, snuggled into Zhan until they were all entangled limbs and joint all along the rest of their bodies.

”Goodmorning,” Yibo mumbled as Zhan cradled him.

”Morning,” Zhan stifled a yawn.

”Slept well, ge?”

”I was dead as a horse. But feeling a lot better now. You?”

”Hmm...same. But I don't feel like leaving the bed. It’s such a rare opportunity to just laze around and do nothing.”

”We can stay in bed, didi,” Zhan planted a kiss on Yibo’s forehead. 

”But what about your adventure?”

”You are my adventure,” Zhan chuckled as Yibo pinched him on hearing the response.

”So cheesy, ge!”

”Only for you,” Zhan giggled.

”Hey! That’s my line!”

The giggles soon turned into tickling and rolling around. As the sunlight spread through the room, Zhan and Yibo wrestled each other playfully, devolving into a fit of unstoppable laughter.

”Okay, enough enough. My god, you’re so competitive.”

”You like it,” Yibo replied smugly.

”Yeah yeah, whatever,” Zhan rolled his eyes.

”Say you like it!” Yibo exclaimed and sat on top of Zhan’s stomach.

”Fine! I love it,” Zhan gave him an amused smile.

”Say you love me despite all my flaws.” Yibo spoke more seriously, his voice holding some vulnerability and uncertainty.

Zhan looked at his face and immediately softened. He sat up and rolled Yibo’s legs around him and then placed his hands on Yibo’s cheeks as Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s neck.

”Of course I do. I love you unconditionally. Just like you love me, flaws and all.”

”Zhan-ge has no flaws!” Yibo grinned once again.

”Are we starting this again, didi?” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

”Zhan-ge is perfect. So beautiful, so kind, so talented, so hot,” Yibo cackled as Zhan blushed and pushed him off.

”Shut up!”

”Zhan-ge is so tall, flawless skin, China’s most eligible bachelor, and all mine!”

”Yes yes,” Zhan smiled, taking Yibo’s chin in his and placing a kiss on his lips. “All yours. Now come here...I want to cuddle.”


	82. I can make all your fantasies come true

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope people aren't getting bored as I weave my way through the vacation slowly haha!

* * *

”Ge?” Yibo played with Zhan’s dainty fingers as they lay in bed.

”Hmm?” Zhan watched fondly.

”What do you like the most about me?”

”Hmm,” Zhan pursed his lips and thought for a few seconds.

”Wow, you need to think about it!?” Yibo propped himself on his elbows, rolling onto his stomach.

”No! Too many things to choose from, didi,” Zhan chuckled.

”Okay, list the top three,” Yibo grinned.

”My god, your ego. Okay...call it loyalty, dedication, or passion...I love that about you the most. When you make up your mind about something, you stick with it. No matter what.”

Yibo smiled from ear to ear and leaned forward placing a kiss on Zhan’s lips. 

”I love how innocent and simple you are in your views about life. You don't complicate things. And you say it as it is. I also love your lips...they’re my favorite part of your body...of course along with your big thick…”

”Ge!” Yibo giggled and placed a hand on Zhan’s mouth.

”Your turn,” Zhan kissed the palm of Yibo’s hand.

”There’s too many...infinite options...but my top three...hmmm...I love your sincerity and humility. You are so grounded and real...unlike the people I know in this industry. I love your kindness...you’re way too nice for your own good sometimes but it’s heartwarming to see how you treat everyone around you. I love how we fit perfectly together when we hug and cuddle like we were always meant to be like this.” Yibo demonstrated as he spoke by snuggling against Zhan once more.

”You’re so sweet, Bo-di.”

”Okay, next question, ge. Ask!”

”Sooo, what do you not like about me?” Zhan smirked. “Be honest…”

”I’m always honest, ge...nothing...absolutely nothing.”

”That’s not possible.”

”Okay...here’s the thing,” Yibo sat up and crossed his legs, looking at Zhan intently. “Like I said, sometimes you’re too good for your own good and one day...I feel like that will come back and bite you.” 

”What do you mean?” Zhan rested his head on his arm.

”People might take advantage of you, ge,” Yibo looked genuinely. “And I don't want that. And we...I might not be able to do anything about it...because we can't make our relationship too obvious.”

Yibo, ah Yibo,” Zhan sat up too and held Yibo’s hand. “I promise I won't let anyone take advantage of me. And if they do, you can cover yourself in a mask like a ninja and go beat them up!” Zhan giggled.

Yibo rolled his eyes but chuckled along.

”You go,” Yibo shook his head and pushed Zhan down so they could lie down once again.

”Uhh,” Zhan bit his lip and thought really hard, “Are you sure you won't get angry?” He grinned finally.

”Of course, ge….tell me!! I want to be the best boyfriend for you.”

”You already are, didi,” Zhan kissed him on the cheek. “Okay...here I go...sometimes your bluntness can be inconsiderate and almost rude. While I think it’s so amazing how honest and true to yourself you are, when you get blunt with interviewers, it’s not good. They’re just doing their job like you are doing your job. And only if everyone works together can this industry grow and the fans will get what they want. I just feel that we should treat the interviewers as humans too and make sure we don't hurt their feelings.”

Yibo remained silent for a while as he pondered over Zhan’s words. 

”But ge, do you think they think of us as regular humans and treat us as such?”

”Maybe not all the time...but that shouldn't change how you treat them. If everyone behaved badly, then the world would go to shit.”

”But they should also know how it feels,” Yibo whined.

”I’m just telling you my opinion, didi...you don't have to take it,” Zhan shrugged.

”No!” Yibo clung to Zhan and kissed his shoulder. “I will try. You might be right...that’s why I love you...because you’re so good and kind.”

”And I will try to not let them take advantage of me, deal?” Zhan raised a pinky finger.

”Deal!” Yibo locked his pinky with Zhan’s and beamed.

”When did you know you liked me, ge?”

”Oh,” Zhan smiled shyly. “Wow...umm...I don't know...I realized I was in love with you when the shoot wrapped up and you found me crying, remember? I just...it sank in that I would never see you regularly again and it...broke my heart. I couldn't bear the thought of getting separated from you! In fact, I had made up my mind to confess at the airport but we kept getting interrupted...”

”Really?! Me too!” Yibo sprung up. “Wow...we wasted so much time, ge!!”

”But we made it,” Zhan smiled and pulled Yibo on top of him.

”Yeah…,” Yibo placed a kiss on Zhan’s lips and was about to pull back when Zhan placed his hand at the back of Yibo’s head and deepened the kiss.

Yibo hummed as Zhan’s soft lips enveloped his and kissed him thoroughly.

”Mmm,” Yibo licked his lips when they finally parted.

”Your turn,” Zhan whispered and ruffled Yibo’s hair.

”For me,” Yibo looked away a little embarrassed, “it was when we shot those intense climax scenes. When I saw you fall off the cliff...and you were crying and looked so broken...I couldn't handle it. I just wanted to hide you from the world and take care of you,” Yibo felt himself tear up.

”Oh,” Zhan caressed his cheeks. “I didn't know…wow...we really did waste a lot of time...”

”It’s okay...we have the rest of our lives…”

Zhan blushed and nodded at Yibo’s words.

”How about we talk about your _list_ now? “ Yibo wiped the corner of his eyes and smirked.

”No! I can't believe I told you that.”

”Come on, ge! How bad can it be? What’s your biggest fetish...or fantasy?! When did you start the list?!”

”Ummm,” Zhan hid his face behind the pillow. “When we confessed...the next day!”

”Wow, you’re never one to take it slow, huh!? Keep robbing that cradle, gege! Old cow feeding on new grass!”

”Shut up! Zhan threw his pillow at a cackling Yibo.

”Tell me, ge! Please!” Yibo threw the pillow aside and leaned over Zhan, pulling his hands away from his face. “I can make all your fantasies come true,” Yibo whispered in a low voice.

Zhan swallowed and let his lips lick the corner of Yibo’s mouth.

”I want to lick things off your body…”

This time, it was Yibo’s turn to gulp.

”Go on…”

”I want to tie you up and blindfold you and fuck you senseless…,” Zhan’s eyes darkened.

”You can do that,” Yibo murmured as his eyes stared at Zhan’s intensely.

”I want you to,” Zhan paused and blushed.

”Tell me, sweetheart.”

”I want you to go harder on me...slap my ass...fuck my mouth...cho...umm...choke me a little…,” Zhan began breathing heavy and looked away from Yibo.

Yibo wrapped his fingers around Zhan’s wrist slowly and dragged his arms over his head, pinning them against the bed.

”I can do that,” he licked his way down the vein on Zhan’s throat. “I left one thing out...I love your neck...especially this fucking throbbing vein.” He bit into it. “Anything else?”

”I want to fuck in a public place,” Zhan trembled as Yibo sucked on his neck.

”Wow...you’re filthy, ge.” Yibo smirked against Zhan’s skin. 

Yibo rolled his hips against Zhan’s. He bit on Zhan’s lower lip and let go only when Zhan moaned in pain. His hand made its way to Zhan’s waist and slid in. He began stroking and kneading into Zhan’s erection.

”Bo-di,” Zhan groaned in a raspy voice. “Bo-di,” he repeated breathing heavier each time.

”You like it rougher, huh?” Yibo pressed into Zhan’s dick, tightening his grip.

”Hmm,” Zhan winced and his lips parted hungry for more.

”Beg me for it,” Yibo let go of Zhan’s dick.

”No! Bo-di...don't stop…”

”Beg for it, gege...I want to hear you plead...or else I’ll have to punish you,” Yibo’s other hand slid down to Zhan’s neck, one finger trailing along the vein.

”Punish me,” Zhan’s eyes darkened.

Yibo smirked and wrapped his hand around Zhan’s neck and leaned forward, ever so lightly applying pressure around his neck.

”So you won't beg?”

Zhan shook his head and bit his lips in anticipation.

Yibo tightened his grip more and knead into Zhan with his hips, rolling against his body, rough and hard. When Zhan moaned, he held his throat harder, still careful though. 

”Looks like I’m going to have to punish you more,” Yibo growled and yanked Zhan up by his shirt.

He pulled it over Zhan’s head and was about to resume his hold on his neck when a shrill and familiar voice startled them.

”Anybody home?! I brought breakfast! Come on lazy heads...wake up!”


	83. I think I need a shot

* * *

Both Yibo’s and Zhan’s eyes widened as they heard the owner’s sweet voice grow closer with every word. Zhan sat up as Yibo left his neck and scrambled off him. Zhan groped for his shirt and yanked it on when he finally got it straightened. He stood up hurriedly and turned around to find Yibo trying to hide under the bed.

”Why are you hiding? Zhan looked at him bewildered.

”I don't know...yeah...it’s stupid...I got confused,” Yibo stood up as well and looked around nervously.

”Maybe you should get under the cover, you’re excitement is showing,” Zhan smirked and raised an eyebrow.

”Are you awake? I’ll bring the breakfast up!” They heard footsteps.

”I’m hiding in the bathroom,” Yibo exclaimed and ran inside, leaving a blinking Zhan behind.

Zhan looked around, getting more flustered as the footsteps drew closer.

”By the way,” Yibo’s head poked out through the door, “your own excitement is showing. Good luck!” He popped back in and closed the door. 

Zhan looked down and to his astonishment, saw that his pants looked like a tent.

”Oh fuck!” He jumped back into the bed, getting under the blanket just in time.

”There you are...lazy lazy!” The woman smiled fondly. “Get up! It’s beautiful day. Where’s your love?”

”Goodmorning, granny.” Zhan pretended to yawn. “He’s getting ready...in the bathroom...showering,” Zhan raised his voice on the last word and immediately the shower turned on.

”See,” Zhan nodded in relief. “Showering.”

”Oh okay okay...I wait downstairs...we eat together...my wife also come. Okay?” She tilted her head to one side and smiled brightly.

Zhan’s heart melted at her warmth and desire to spend time with them. 

”Of course, granny. We’ll be down in a few minutes,” he smiled back.

When she left, Zhan stood up and closed the bedroom door. He knocked on the bathroom and when Yibo opened the door, he let out a sigh of relief.”That was close,” he chuckled.

”Yeah,” Yibo grinned and shook his head.

”Come on, let’s get ready. They’re waiting for breakfast.”

”If we shower together, it’ll be faster,” Yibo smirked.

”I don't think so,” Zhan took a step back just out of Yibo’s reach.

”Ge!” Yibo pouted.

”How can I say no to that face,” Zhan groaned and ran a hand down his face. “Fine...a quickie…”

”We’ll get to your list later…,” Yibo winked and pulled Zhan inside by his shirt.

* * *

After breakfast which actually counted as lunch because of the time at which they ended up eating, Zhan and Yibo walked around the neighborhood hand in hand. Zhan soaked in the sun and the happiness he felt at the freedom he was experiencing.

”We could never do this back home,” Zhan sighed. “I’m glad we came on this trip.”

”This is just the first one, ge. We’ll make it a point to take at least one trip every four months okay? Yibo smiled and kissed Zhan’s hand.

”What do you wanna do today?”

”How about we go to that dinner place granny was telling us about later? And we could go dancing?”

”Me? Dancing!” Zhan giggled.

”It’ll be fun. I wanna dance with you. I wanna do all the things with you that I can't do back home.”

”Fine!” Zhan surrendered. “Let’s go dancing.”

* * *

The restaurant was as beautiful as the old women had described. Zhan and Yibo got a sea-facing table. They looked around in awe at the fairy light that lit up their corner, at the flowers that lined the restaurant, they enjoyed the warm breeze and the delicious aroma of the food all around them.

Yibo reached out and held Zhan’s hand as he read the menu. He intertwined their fingers, watching affectionately as Zhan read the items carefully and stuck his tongue out as he tried making sense of the dish descriptions. 

”You’re cute...my bunny,” Yibo grinned.

”Stop calling me that,” Zhan said but couldn't stop himself from giggling.

After ordering the food, Zhan leaned forward and gazed into Yibo’s eyes.

”How did I get so lucky?” Zhan murmured, satisfied with everything about that moment.

”I think I’m the one who got lucky.” Yibo kissed the back of Zhan’s hand.

The food arrived relatively quickly and Yibo watched in amusement as Zhan eyed it all with lust and impatience and relished each bite with sounds that definitely did not belong in a public place.

”You really love food, don't you?” Yibo laughed.

”Only good food,” Zhan beamed with food still in his mouth prompting Yibo to laugh more and reach forward to wipe the corner of his mouth.

”And you eat like a bunny too...in small fast bites.”

”What? I do not!”

”I love you,” Yibo blew a kiss at a pouting Zhan.

When they were done with dinner, they bowed and thanked the server and left the place hand in hand.

”The club is just around the block...according to that man I asked,” Yibo wrapped his arm around Zhan as they walked at a leisurely pace.

”I can't promise you’ll enjoy dancing with me,” Zhan laughed nervously.

”’l enjoy anything and everything with you, ge,” Yibo pulled him closer and kissed him passionately. “You’re perfect.”

”Alright alright, don't butter me. I’m already yours.”

When they found the club, Yibo perked up at the upbeat music streaming out. As soon as they entered, Zhan found himself engulfed in the neon darkness. He clutched onto Yibo’s hand who was energized by every beat. He dashed forward with Zhan towards the bar. 

”Ge! This place is awesome! “

”I think I need a shot,” Zhan swallowed his nervousness. 

”Two shots! Whatever you want!” Yibo screamed over the music to the bartender.

When the shots arrived, Zhan grabbed his and, with a quick clink, downed the shot. Yibo watched happily as he downed his shot, his entire body already moving to the music. 

”Come on, ge...let’s hit the dance floor.”

”I think I need one more shot,” Zhan giggled. “Please!”

They downed the second one just as fast and Zhan shook his head and entire body to loosen himself up.

”You’ll be fine, Zhan-ge,” Yibo grabbed him by the waist and kissed him. “I’ve got you,” he whispered.


	84. I will not calm down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is how I imagine Zhan dressed at the club and always :P   
> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DwZLlRaVsAAv0aj?format=jpg&name=medium
> 
> And this is Yibo's look although I couldn't find the whole look, y'all know what I'm going for  
> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DfPisOjUEAAha8A.jpg

* * *

Zhan followed Yibo to the dance floor, the alcohol slowly doing its job. The song changed to something more sexy with slow beats and a seductive bass. When they found a spot on the floor, Yibo pulled Zhan closer, swaying side to side. He wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist gently and directed his hips to move in sync with him.

”How does that feel?” Yibo tightened his grip.

”I feel like I look stupid,” Zhan giggled and hid his face in Yibo’s chest.

”You look hot,” Yibo replied, straightening Zhan and putting a little distance between them. “If only you could see yourself right now, Zhan-ge!"

Zhan blushed and closed the gap once more. He put his arms around Yibo’s neck and feeling the alcohol finally sink into him, he began moving with the beat. Yibo’s jaw dropped when Zhan began swaying his body from side to side, occasionally rolling against Yibo’s entire body.

Zhan rolled his head around slowly, exposing his neck and all Yibo could do to control himself from licking it was grab him by the hair and pull his face towards him.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo licked his lips. “Be careful...you’re making me hard.”

Zhan laughed and shook his head. He ran his hands through Yibo’s hair and dragged it all the way down to Yibo’s shoulder.

”Show me some of your moves, Bo-di. I know you want to…”

Yibo’s eyes brightened and he took a few steps back as the song changed to a more upbeat hip-hop one once more. Slowly, Yibo’s body began to pick up speed and he followed the rhythm effortlessly. Zhan noticed how some people around them stopped dancing and watched him move in awe. Zhan felt proud and possessive all at the same time.

Yibo moved like a snake and then moved into his freestyle routines. When he did his signature move, flipping around and spinning and then diving to the floor to roll on it, the other guests began hooting and clapping.

When he got up, a girl made her way through the crowd and joined him on the dance floor. She seemed to be a good dancer as well as she matched his moves with her own. She swayed and twirled circles around Yibo who grinned and continued his own freestyling. 

All of a sudden, she spun around, straight into Yibo and wrapped one arm around his waist, rolling her body against him. Yibo’s eyes widened and he jerked back, shocked at the sudden breach of his personal space.

Immediately, he looked at Zhan and sure enough, he was seething in rage. Yibo gulped. He had never seen Zhan this angry. He tried pushing away from the girl but she clasped his arm and pulled him closer.

Zhan gritted his teeth and Yibo could see the rage building up. Having had enough of the forced dancing, Yibo literally pushed her away.

”I don't want to dance with you. Sorry!” Yibo blurted and walked over to Zhan who walked away and ordered another drink.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo rushed over and turned him to face him by the arm.

Zhan kept clenching his teeth and Yibo saw him trying to keep it together.

”I’m sorry, she came out of nowhere.” Yibo rubbed his back soothingly.

Zhan downed the drink that was handed to him and only then did he turn to face Yibo.

”It’s fine,” Zhan spoke slowly and purposefully.

”No, it’s not.” Yibo kissed Zhan’s shoulder.

”You didn't do anything. It was that bitch!” Zhan growled.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo was taken aback but couldn't help but laugh. 

”If she stuck to you any longer, I would have ripped her hair off.” Zhan continued in all seriousness.

”Well then thank god I pushed her away.”

”One more drink,” Zhan ordered. “You want one?”

”Go slow, ge.”

”I don't want to...we’re on vacation,” Zhan’s face finally relaxed and he pouted.

Yibo pulled his cheek and placed a kiss on Zhan’s nose.

”And you’re here to take care of me,” Zhan batted his eyelids, still pouting.

”Yes, I am,” Yibo pinched Zhan’s nose.

”Hey, you,” a heavy voice growled from behind them.

They turned around to see a frowning man standing behind them, his arms crossed across his chest.

”You push my girlfriend?”

”Huh?” Yibo mumbled.

”I said,” he stepped closer, “You pushed my girl.”

”No, he didn't.” Zhan stepped in between them. “She was throwing herself at him.”

”She was just dancing,” the man frowned harder.

”She was getting too close to _my_ boyfriend,” Zhan stepped right up to the man, using his height to his advantage.

”He was getting too close,” the man stepped closer until they were almost nose to nose.

”Alright,” Yibo pulled Zhan back, “enough...calm down both you,” he gestured to them both. “Calm down,” he repeated as clearly as he could in english.

”I will not calm down,” the man stepped around Zhan and grabbed Yibo by the collar.

”Hey!” Zhan yelled and put his hand on the man’s wrist, glaring at him. “Back off. Now.”

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo yanked the man’s hand off him. “Let’s go.”

Zhan nodded and led Yibo away by the hand when he suddenly felt Yibo being yanked away from him. He turned to see the man holding Yibo by the collar once more and before he knew what he was doing, Zhan walked back angrily and pushing him back, raised his hand and brought it down in one swift punch, making contact with the man’s chin.


	85. That was hot

* * *

As soon as Zhan’s knuckles made contact with the chin, three things happened - he heard Yibo gasp behind him and curse out loud, he heard the man groan and fall lower onto one knee, and he felt a painful throbbing ache resonate from his hand up his arm. 

But something had taken over Zhan at the sight of the man’s hand clenching his Yibo’s collar threateningly. That same feeling was only getting magnified now as he found himself walking towards the crouching man and grabbing him by his collar this time.

”How dare you lay a finger on my boyfriend,” Zhan growled in a low voice. “Apologize…”

The man tried standing up and pushing Zhan back but Zhan used his height to his advantage yet again and shoved him further down until he was on both knees. 

”I said...apologize,” Zhan repeated, eyeing him angrily.

”Your boyfriend broke my tooth!!” The man waved his arm in Yibo’s direction, who just shrugged and grinned, as blood continued slipping out of his gums.

”Hey!” Zhan brought his attention back to him. “Say sorry…”

”Sorry...fine...sorry…,” he yanked himself away from Zhan and started stepping back.

”Fuck off,” Zhan spat out, his rage showing no signs of simmering down.

”Ge!” Yibo interrupted his seething. “Look...the bouncers…”

The next thing Zhan knew, Yibo had grabbed his hand and they were running out the club at breakneck speed. He could hear Yibo laughing ahead of him while his own heart was racing. They made their way through the narrow paths and alleys until he stopped in one alley, breathless and panting. Yibo caught his breath first and immediately pushed Zhan against the wall.

”That was hot!” Yibo kissed Zhan desperately.

Yibo nipped at his lips and sucked on his neck frantically, unable to control the fire in his body.

”How can you switch from cute to fucking hot in one fucking second,” Yibo devoured Zhan’s lips.

”Ahh...Bo-di,” Zhan moaned as he felt himself being pushed harder against the wall.

”Fuck, ge...I want to suck your dick right now.”

Zhan looked at Yibo and with a dark, intense gaze, placed his hand on Yibo’s shoulders and pushed him down onto his knees. Yibo smirked and quickly unzipped Zhan’s pants. He pulled Zhan’s half erect dick out and with a few quick licks, brought it to full erection.

Zhan threw his head back, banging against the wall as Yibo took his entire hardness in his mouth in one go. He grabbed Yibo’s hair and looked down at him as his lips stretched all around his erection.

”Fuck, Yibo…,” Zhan growled. “Your mouth is so beautiful around my dick.

Yibo felt the words go straight to his own dick and he began moving his mouth up and down, sucking on Zhan harder and faster. Within seconds, Zhan was groaning and pushing Yibo’s head against his hips. He began thrusting his hips forward and fucked Yibo’s mouth. When Yibo began choking, Zhan pulled him up and kissed him fervently.

When Zhan finally let go, Yibo wiped his mouth, grinning, but before he could say anything, Zhan turned him around against the wall and began lowering his pants. 

”I want to fuck you, Bo-di.”

”Ge…,” Yibo stuttered. “Here?”

”Right here, right now…,” Yibo saw Zhan pull something from his pocket.

”You have condoms in your pocket?!”

”I wanted to check one more thing off my list,” Zhan bit his lips and began grinding his dick against Yibo’s ass.

”Fuck,” Yibo looked around quickly before groaning louder in pleasure as Zhan licked his fingers and began teasing Yibo’s opening. “Ge…”

Before he could finish, Zhan inserted his finger in, drawing a long moan out of Yibo. Pretty soon, he was able to insert another finger and began scissoring him open. 

“Tell me how bad you want me inside you…,” Zhan leaned forward and licked the back of Yibo’s neck.

”I wanted you to fuck me on the dance floor, gege...I wanted you to show everyone there that I belong to you...,” Yibo groaned as Zhan inserted a third finger.

”Next time, remember this before you let anyone come close to you…,” Zhan grunted as he lined up with Yibo’s opening and pushed inside. 

Zhan pushed Yibo forward until he was bent over against the wall and pushed into him until he bottomed out. Yibo fell against the wall, panting, and they stilled for a moment. Slowly Zhan began grinding once more and Yibo let out a whimper.

”Faster, ge,” Yibo’s voice grew heavier with every thrust. “I can take it.”

Zhan grabbed Yibo by the neck and waist and began thrusting into him like he wanted to dig through his body and feel all of him around him. Zhan put his entire body into the thrusts, pounding into Yibo, nearly slapping him against the wall. Zhan watched as Yibo began reaching for his erection.

”No touching,” Zhan growled and bit his back. “I want you to come only by my dick.”

With those words, Zhan spread Yibo’s legs further apart and raised his hips up forcing Yibo to bend lower until he got the angle he wanted. Yibo let out a scream when Zhan hit his spot and didn't stop ramming into it over and over. Zhan rotated his hips and pushed into Yibo a few more times and then felt a shiver roll down Yibo’s body.

Sensing that he was close, Zhan yanked Yibo up and turned his face towards him, capturing his lips in a sloppy kiss. They locked lips and tongues and drowned into the kiss. With one final thrust, they moaned into each other’s mouth. Gradually, Zhan slumped against Yibo and Yibo could feel Zhan's heart racing against his back.

”Fuck,” Yibo shivered. “What was that?”.

”Are you..okay??” Zhan pulled out and tied the condom, looking around for a dumpster.

”At one point, I thought I was going to die,” Yibo turned around and faced Zhan. "We really need a safe word," Yibo grinned mischievously.

”Sorry I got carried away,” Zhan chuckled and rubbed his nose against Yibo’s.

He smiled and brushed a strand of hair away from Yibo’s eyes. He kissed him, softly at first, getting more and more passionate as the seconds flew by. When he finally pulled back, Yibo was giving him a sleepy smile.

”Let’s go home, Zhan-ge,” Yibo planted a chaste kiss on his lips before standing straight and buttoning up first his then Zhan’s pants.

They found a trash bin along the way and as Zhan threw the condom, Yibo giggled.

”I can't believe you had a condom on you!”

”Shut up!”

”So one more thing off the list?” Yibo smirked.

Zhan blushed and nodded. Yibo pulled him in for a quick kiss and they continued walking, arms entwined, blissful and content. They stared at the stars, pausing in between to admire the night sky. Zhan took every chance he got to kiss Yibo.

”I can't believe we have only one more day and then we’ll leave the day after tomorrow.” Zhan sighed as they made their way up the now familiar cobbled road.

”Yeah,” Yibo sighed and rested his head in the crook of Zhan’s neck as they neared the cottage.

Once inside, they showered together, caressing each other’s body with their lips and tongues and hands. Zhan hummed a song that Yibo recognized immediately. He locked lips with Zhan, relishing the taste of alcohol and spices that filled his own mouth. 

When they got into bed, Zhan tucked them in lovingly.

”Goodnight, ge,” Yibo smiled in satisfaction.

Goodnight, sweetie,” Zhan pulled him closer and planted several kisses on Yibo’s face.

* * *

When Zhan woke up, the space beside him was empty. He rubbed his eyes and let out a long groan as he stretched and sprawled across the bed. He covered his face with the blanket and stayed like that for several minutes.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo’s soft voice appeared out of nowhere.

Zhan smiled under the sheet and slowly, he lowered it and turned to his side. Zhan’s breath caught when he saw Yibo on one knee with a rose in his hand and an angelic smile on his face.

”Happy Valentine’s day, Xiao Zhan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can all probably see by now, in my head XZ is everything - cute, hot, angry, sweet....LOL...didn't do a whole action scene but hope it was still fun to read!


	86. Happy valentine's day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's to freedom of speech, the equality of all, and spreading only love and kindness.

* * *

”Happy Valentine’s day, Xiao Zhan,” Yibo grinned and leaned forward to place a kiss on a very bewildered Zhan, whose mouth was parted, revealing his bunny teeth.

”Uhh...Bo-di,” Zhan mumbled as he sat up. “What…”

”Today is 14th Feb, ge,” Yibo rested his elbows on the side of the bed and placed a kiss on Zhan’s thigh. “Happy first valentine’s day together,” he smiled happily.

”Oh, shit! I totally forgot, Yibo. I’m sorry,” Zhan scrambled onto the floor beside Yibo and held his hand. “Happy valentine’s day,” he looked ashamed and nervous.

”It’s okay, ge...take this,” Yibo handed him the rose and held his face up by the chin. 

”This is...so sweet, didi...I’m sorry...I don't have anything for you,” Zhan frowned and looked away.

”Come here,” Yibo pulled Zhan into his arms and gave him a long, tight hug. “I have everything here in my arms...and don't say so cheesy!”

”So cheesy,” Zhan giggled and nuzzled his face into Yibo’s chest. “And only for me.”

”Only for you,” Yibo grinned wider and kissed Zhan’s head.

”Now come on,” Yibo stood up. “Get ready! I have the whole day planned!”

”You...do?” Zhan stood up wide-eyed and surprised.

”Yep,” Yibo nodded enthusiastically. “Let’s go downstairs, your first surprise is ready!”

”First?” Zhan blurted as Yibo grabbed his hand and pulled him out the room and down the stairs.

”I cooked you breakfast,” Yibo grinned proudly and pointed at the dining table.

Zhan’s jaw dropped as he saw the spread. There were pancakes and eggs, sunny side up just the way Zhan liked, sausages, orange juice and some muffins. And the most surprising thing - nothing was burnt and the kitchen was intact.

” _You_ made this?! You?”

”Yep!”

”Really?” Zhan’s eyes narrowed.

”Okay, okay, granny helped,” Yibo rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

”Aww,” Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo’s neck, “This is so sweet, didi,” he pecked his cheek.

”But I did most of the work while she directed, ge! It’s super tasty!” Yibo forced Zhan down on the chair by his shoulders.

Zhan chuckled as Yibo cut a piece of the muffin and held the fork up to Zhan’s mouth. He took the bite and to his utter surprise, it was indeed delicious. Yibo looked at him expectantly.

”It’s amazing,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s hand and smiled brightly.

”Told you!” Yibo sat across Zhan and began serving both of them.

Zhan eyed all the dishes gleefully and dug in. With each bite, he moaned softly and praised Yibo lavishly. Yibo watched him affectionately as Zhan ate all the dishes enthusiastically.

When they were done, Yibo forced Zhan to stay seated and he cleared the dishes himself.

”You’re spoiling me!” Zhan exclaimed.

”That’s the whole point, gege,” Yibo poked his head out of the kitchen and winked.

”So what’s the plan next?” Zhan walked to the kitchen and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s waist as he did the dishes, kissing his neck.

”It’s a surprise,” Yibo chuckled, shaking his head.

They got ready once Yibo was done and walked to the bike. 

”Heads up, it’s a one hour yacht ride away.”

”Can’t wait,” Zhan smiled and leaned against Yibo’s back with a happy sigh.

* * *

Zhan leaned against the railing as the yacht cruised along. Yibo stood beside him, pressed against his arm. As they moved at a leisurely pace, Zhan leaned his head back, enjoying the fresh sea breeze that ruffled his hair. Yibo stole glances at a content Zhan.

_I can't decide which view is better - the ocean or him. Who am I kidding? Of course, it’s Zhan-ge._

Yibo leaned closer and placed a kiss on Zhan’s cheek. Zhan smiled at Yibo dreamily, feeling overwhelmed with emotions. Yibo rested his hand against Zhan’s cheek and opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something, but ultimately decided not to.

”What is it, Bo-di?”

”Nothing...I just love you so much.”

I love you too,” Zhan leaned into Yibo’s touch.

When the captain announced their arrival, Yibo helped Zhan onto the dock and turned back to pick up a large basket that Zhan had not noticed earlier. He noticed Yibo whisper something to the captain who nodded with a smile. Zhan pursed his lips wondering what was going on.

Yibo turned around and led Zhan by the hand away from the yacht. The island was small and sandy. Yibo was dressed in loose white pants and a white shirt and Zhan was in similar pants and a light pink shirt.

After ten minutes of walking, Yibo’s breath hitched when he saw a dining table and two chairs set up in the distance along a quiet and empty beach. The table was placed under a shamiana that had flowers hanging from it, fluttering in the wind. 

Zhan gasped as they walked closer towards the beautiful setup.

”Is that...for us?”

Do you like it,” Yibo smiled gently.

”I...I love it,” Zhan’s voice trembled as Yibo placed the basket on the table.

As soon as he had done so, Zhan leapt forward and wrapped his arms around Yibo.

”I love it!!” 

Yibo chuckled and pulled Zhan closer by his waist.

”Come on, this is for later,” Yibo smirked and pulled Zhan away from the tent.

”What are we gonna do now then?”

Yibo took off his shirt and pants and handed Zhan a pair of shorts that were placed in another bag kept under the table.

”Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed excitedly and followed suit.

They quickly changed into swim shorts and Yibo pulled out another item from the bag. To Zhan’s surprise and delight it was a small camera.

”It’s waterproof, ge!” Yibo handed it over.

”This is perfect!” Zhan jumped excitedly and grabbed Yibo’s hand and dashed for the beach.

Yibo laughed as he followed Zhan and they ran into the water, making splashes all around them. Zhan let out a happy scream as he kept going until they were waist deep. When Yibo stopped beside him, Zhan looked at him with a grin and plastered his body against him, taking his lips in his.

They smiled against each other’s lips and deepened the kiss. Yibo ran his hand up and down Zhan’s back and wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist once more, picking him up off his feet.

Zhan giggled and plunged deeper into Yibo’s mouth, wrapping his tongue around Yibo’s. When they pulled apart to catch their breath, their eyes were brimming with happiness. Zhan turned his face sideways and pressed his cheek against Yibo’s. He raised the camera up and clicked a photo of them.

Yibo placed a kiss on Zhan’s cheek as he clicked another one. Then Zhan did the same and they laughed more as they took turns nibbling each other as Zhan kept clicking.

”Okay okay, enough.” Zhan pulled away and Yibo pouted.

Zhan smirked and all of a sudden and, much to Yibo’s shock, brought both his hands down onto the water causing a giant splash that crashed straight against Yibo’s face.

”Oh you’re so dead!” Yibo cackled and rushed forward, waving his arms in the water, sending small waves at Zhan. Zhan yelped and ran away in an attempt to escape. Yibo finally caught up and jumped on Zhan, sinking them both into the fresh, cool water.

Yibo held on to Zhan and dove in for another kiss. Zhan pushed him away and jumped on him, bringing them both underwater once more. As the day progressed, Zhan and Yibo spent the hours swimming in the freshness, snorkeling over a small reef, playing together in the waves body surfing and jostling about. 

When they finally returned to the shamiana, Yibo pulled out two towels from the same bag and placed one around his neck and used the other one to dry Zhan’s arms and back and hair.

”Wow, you came prepared…,” Zhan let Yibo turn him around and wipe him up and down.

”I want our first valentine’s to be special,” Yibo smiled shyly.

Zhan pulled Yibo’s towel off his neck and dried Yibo.

”Well, you’ve succeeded.

”We’re not done yet! I brought a picnic dinner sort of,” Yibo grinned.

”Sort of?”

”Well. I tried making pasta and bread but I tanked,” Yibo pouted. “So I ended up making sandwiches and a salad instead. Sorry.”

”I don't care,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s nose. “It’s perfect no matter what...you made it for me.’

After so much time in the water, both of their appetites were large and impatient. They devoured the food hungrily and nearly down the wine equally fast. When they were done and satiated, they groaned and stretched back in their chairs.

”That was actually very tasty, Bo-di.”

”Because we were so hungry,” Yibo chuckled.

Zhan shook his head and laughed along.

They sat there in comfortable silence, enjoying the sound of the waves. As the evening began setting in, Yibo stood up and walked to the edge of the tent. He bent down and Zhan heard a click. Immediately, the shamiana lit up with fairy lights and Zhan gasped in shock and delight.

”Bo-di,” Zhan stood up slowly, drinking in the beautiful sight.

Yibo walked up to him and took his face in his hands. He leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on Zhan’s lips.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo began but paused.

”What is it, Bo-di?” Zhan tilted his head, still dazed and smiling.

”I…,” Yibo gulped, still hesitant.

”What…,” Zhan massaged Yibo’s back gently.

Yibo bit his lip and walked Zhan back to the chair and sat him down. He knelt in front of him and with a deep breath, took Zhan’s hand in his and placed a kiss on the back.

”Ge,” Yibo began, lips trembling. “We...we’ve known each other for ten months now,” Yibo began smiling. “And we’ve been together for four months….and these have been the best months of my life.”

”I feel the same way, didi,” Zhan felt his heart stop but managed a smile.

”And...and I want you to be my valentine forever…”


	87. I want that too

* * *

”I...I want that too,” Zhan got off his chair and knelt in front of Yibo, his face inches from Yibo’s.

Zhan could feel his eyes burning and he saw the shiny tears in Yibo’s eyes. He pulled him into a hug and swayed with him for several seconds. Yibo tightened the embrace, unable to find his voice for some time.

Finally, feeling ready to go on, Yibo pulled back.

”Xiao Zhan,” Yibo continued, “I love you from the bottom of my heart. I can't even begin to explain how special and important you are to me. You’ve made me happier than I ever thought I could be. And if you will let me, I want to spend the rest of my life making you just as happy. I know,” Yibo took another breath, “it’s only been a few months...and I don't want to pressure you...or jump to...anything...but I wanted...I was wondering...can we...I want to,” Yibo fumbled for words again.

”I want to make a promise to you too, Wang Yibo,” Zhan finished his sentence.

Yibo looked up in surprise at Zhan’s words that were exactly what he had wanted to say.

”How about,” Zhan continued, “how about we...take the next step nice and slow...will you...will you move in with me, didi?” Zhan's smile was radiant.

”Really?” Yibo’s eyes widened.

”Really,” Zhan leaned in and enveloped Yibo’s lips in his. "Nothing would make me happier."

They rested their foreheads together when they pulled back and Yibo felt his entire body tremble with overwhelming emotions. His tears finally slid out and he hid his face in the crook of Zhan’s neck.

”If you cry, I’ll cry,” Zhan whispered as his own tears began falling down his cheeks.

They held each other for several minutes. Eventually, Zhan stood up and helped Yibo up too. He wrapped one arm around his waist and picked up Yibo's hand with another one. He pulled him closer until their faces were mere inches from each other. He moved his feet slowly, side to side, nudging Yibo to follow suit. Yibo smiled softly and began moving along to the rhythm Zhan set.

Zhan began humming a tune. On hearing it, Yibo leaned his head against Zhan's chest and began singing the words.

_I’ll arrange a romantic date, and won’t worry about screwing everything up  
To have you is to have the world  
My dear, from the day I fell in love with you  
Being sweet has been so easy  
My dear, stop playing around;  
Your eyes are saying “I do”_

Yibo pulled back a little and look Zhan in the eyes as he sang the last two lines. When they finished the song, they remained in each other's arm, still swaying in the comforting silence.

"Ge..."

"Hmm.."

”I know we’re just moving in...but...I hope you know,” Yibo whispered, “that in my heart...I know...I want…”

”Me too, didi,” Zhan pulled back and held Yibo’s face in his hands, gazing into his eyes. “I want that too.”

* * *

They walked back hand in hand, eyes shining, lips stretched into wide smiles, bodies leaning against each other. They got onto the yacht just as the sun began its final descent. As they sailed back, Zhan hugged Yibo from behind and they silently watched the setting sun.

”Bo-di,” Zhan whispered into Yibo’s ear.

”Hmm?” Yibo leaned back against Zhan’s chest.

”I...I want to...tell our parents before moving in. It’s a big step...and I don't want to hide this from them anymore.”

Yibo turned around and tilted his head with a smile.

”I think so too,” he nodded.

”When do you think we can…”

”My schedule is okay for the next few weeks but later on, I have a lot of brand shoots and travelling. You?”

”I have the final schedule of Jade Dynasty later in March and April.

”So...maybe the beginning of March?”

”Yeah, the sooner the better. My family is already pissed I didn't go home for the lunar new year,” Zhan chuckled.

”Mine too,” Yibo grinned. “Plus I want to move in as soon as I can with you,” Yibo bit Zhan’s lower lip and then licked it.

”Me too, didi...me too," Zhan chuckle and proceeded to kiss Yibo for the remainder of their trip back.

* * *

When they finally reached home, Yibo didn't let go of Zhan’s hand. They showered together, a regular habit now, and gently washed each other, planting occasional kisses on each other’s bodies, never looking away for more than a few seconds. They gazed into each other’s eyes intently as they dried each other and smiled into their kisses. Zhan took Yibo’s lips in his and kissed him softly.

He walked Yibo backwards, without putting on any clothes, and laid him down on the bed. Zhan lay beside him, massaging his head, brushing his hair away from his forehead, leaning down to kiss it. Yibo placed a kiss on Zhan’s wrist and down his arm. Zhan rested his forehead against Yibo’s and sighed as Yibo turned his attention to Zhan’s lips. They kissed for several minutes, softly playing with each other’s tongues, lapping up every inch of their mouths.

Zhan shifted and got on top of Yibo, kissing his way down Yibo’s jaw, neck, throat, collar bone, chest.Yibo moaned as Zhan kissed his nipples, licking them lightly, playing with them until they were hard and erect. Satisfied, Zhan licked Yibo’s skin, pausing at his belly button. Zhan bit the soft skin, making Yibo squirm in pleasure. He bit and nibbled on Yibo’s waist as his hands began massaging Yibo’s thighs. Yibo spoke Zhan’s name softly, spurring Zhan on as he worshipped every inch of Yibo’s body.

Zhan kissed Yibo’s length, leaving a wet trail as he tasted the now hard erection. His hands massaged their way up the back of Yibo’s thigh to his plush soft cheeks. Yibo adjusted his body to allow Zhan more access. Zhan smiled against Yibo’s skin and bit his inner thigh, following it up with soft kisses. Yibo sighed as his entire body melted under Zhan’s touch. Zhan took Yibo’s tip in his mouth and sucked on it ever so lightly. 

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispered, running his hand through Zhan’s hair, tilting his head up to look at Yibo.

Zhan stretched his body over Yibo’s and rubbed their noses together. He placed light kisses on the soft cheeks and smiling lips.

”Zhan-ge…”

They looked into each other’s eyes for several seconds, an unspoken thought passing through the space between them. Zhan smiled and gave Yibo a long, deep kiss. He reached out for the lube and stayed beside Yibo, who propped his knees up, as his fingers made their way to his soft pink slit. Not once did their eyes leave each other as Zhan’s fingers moved in and out of Yibo tenderly. Yibo’s breathing turned heavier with every probe and Zhan kissed his lips again and again, whispering soothing, loving words in his ear. When Yibo was open and willing, Zhan placed another kiss on his forehead. He began reaching out for the condom but felt Yibo pull him back. Zhan turned around questioningly.

”I...we don't need it,” Yibo whispered.

The words made a shiver shoot down Zhan’s spine.

”Are you...are you sure?”

”I want to feel you,” Yibo’s whispers grew softer.

”I want to feel you too, didi,” Zhan smiled and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s body, pulling him in for a hug.

He peppered Yibo’s neck and shoulder with kisses and finally pulled back once more. Zhan climbed on top of Yibo again and placed himself between his legs. Yibo pulled his knees closer to his body, spreading his legs wide. Zhan slid his body over Yibo’s, guiding himself in carefully, eyes never leaving Yibo. When they made contact, Yibo’s breath hitched. Zhan kissed Yibo slowly and lovingly as he made his way into Yibo. Once they connected, like the perfect puzzle pieces finding each other, Zhan and Yibo locked lips and never let go.

To both of them, it felt like the first time. Nothing had changed, yet everything had changed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is the one Zhan sang on TTXS when asked how he would serenade the person he liked -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AxYLa5eqUhc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9E72JweMpw
> 
> Also, I'm wondering how many of y'all got the reference I snuck from the TV show 'Friends'!!!


	88. I know we can't do anything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, almost forgot - the friends reference - the long love confession speech by Yibo was basically what Chandler said when he proposed to Monica ^_^
> 
> One of you got it - FandomChild13!!!

* * *

When Yibo opened his eyes, the sun was barely peeking out from its hiding place. He stretched himself just enough to feel his neck crack but not so much that Zhan would be disturbed.

A smile spread across his lips as he remembered the previous night. The lovemaking had satisfied more than just his body. His heart felt like it had expanded to twice its original size. His mind felt calm and at peace, secure in the moment. 

He glanced up at Zhan who was still fast asleep. Their bodies were, as always, entangled together. He smiled wider as he remembered their promise from the previous day. The words that they had said and the thoughts that they had left unsaid, came rushing back to Yibo.

 _I’m going to wake up to this face everyday._ Yibo thought fondly. _We’re going to be together forever. Zhan-ge promised. I promised. We promised ourselves to each other._

Yibo nuzzled against Zhan’s bare chest and gently kissed the soft skin. He could feel Zhan’s steady breathing and he shifted his head closer in an attempt to listen to his heartbeats.

”Bo-di?” A soft voice mumbled. “Are you awake?”

”Mmm,” Yibo tilted his face up and his eyes landed on Zhan’s sleepy face. “Morning, ge.”

”Goodmorning,” Zhan smiled as he placed a kiss on Yibo’s forehead. “What time is it?”

Yibo stretched his arm over Zhan and tilted the phone towards them.

”10:20,” he pursed his lips.

”We should get ready…”

”But the flight’s later at night!” Yibo pouted.

”Yeah but we have to leave soon if we want to catch the ferry on time so that we can catch that flight,” Zhan chuckled.

”Oh yeah,” Yibo groaned. “Who’s idea was it to get a house on a remote island!?”

”Yours, didi...it was your idea,” Zhan grinned and tickled Yibo.

”Ge!! Stop it,” Yibo giggled and rolled away and out of the bed.

”Good...you’re up...now go get ready,” Zhan looked smug.

”Not without you,” Yibo smirked and climbed back onto the bed and on top of Zhan. 

”I wanna sleep for ten more minutes!” Zhan whined.

”Then I’m sleeping too,” Yibo lay on top of Zhan.

”Okay, okay...fine,” Zhan huffed although still hugging Yibo to his body. “Let’s get ready.”

* * *

The ferry rides went by smoothly. Zhan and Yibo watched silently as they left the island that had been their home for four days. The farther they sailed, the further their hearts sank. Zhan held onto Yibo’s hand firmly when he saw the longing look on his face. Zhan could feel his own sighs turning wistful.

When they disembarked from the last ferry, Zhan and Yibo made their way to the taxi stand and waited. 

”I can't believe it’s over,” Yibo spoke softly.

”Me too,” Zhan rubbed Yibo’s back slowly.

”Now…,” Yibo’s voice trembled, “I won't be able to hold your hand like this anymore. I won't be able to do this anymore,” Yibo leaned forward and placed a kiss on Zhan’s lip.

”It’s okay, didi,” Zhan smiled and kissed his nose, “Soon, we’ll be living together!”

”Yeah,” Yibo smiled finally, “yeah.”

After another ride, they reached the airport and Zhan reluctantly let go of Yibo’s hand. He felt his heart ache when he saw the puppy look on Yibo’s face. 

”Sorry, didi,” Zhan smiled apologetically, “we need to be…”

”Cautious now,” Yibo nodded in resignation and sighed.

The flight was on time and as they boarded, Zhan and Yibo made their way to their seats in silence. When the plane began taking off, Zhan discreetly held onto Yibo’s hand and squeezed it tight. Yibo threw him a grateful look once the plane reached altitude.

Eventually, the lights were dimmed and silence spread across the flight. Yibo looked at Zhan and when Zhan noticed the smirk on his face, a blush spread across his entire face and neck.

”Stop it!” Zhan smacked Yibo’s arm. “Stop looking at me like that.”

”Why, ge?” Yibo smirked more and leaned closer to Zhan.

”You know why…,” Zhan whispered, blushing harder.

”Am I making you want to do things to me, ge?” Yibo batted his eyelids and threw Zhan an innocent look.

”Shut up, Bo-di!” Zhan shook his head. “Too risky…”

”And it wasn't risky back then?”

”I..,” Zhan blinked, “I…”

”You...you?” Yibo mimicked the clueless expression on his face.

”I was just really horny then,” Zhan grinned and covered his face, giggling.

”Zhan-ge!!” Yibo chuckled and pulled his hands away from his face. “And you’re not now?” Yibo pouted.

”I can see that you definitely are?” Zhan smirked and let his hand linger on Yibo’s crotch before pulling back.

Yibo gulped and nodded. The next thing he knew, Zhan was pulling out the blanket and covering them with it. Yibo bit his lips as Zhan looked around carefully and then let his hand slide under the sheet. 

Zhan leaned closer and grazed Yibo’s ear with his lips as he whispered into it. Yibo’s eyes widened as Zhan said exactly what he wanted to do to him once they were alone again, as his hand unzipped Yibo’s pants, slid inside and slowly massaged the now erect dick.

Yibo muffled his moans against Zhan’s shoulder as Zhan continued whispering his erotic intentions, his hands picking up the pace, grabbing Yibo harder, moving quickly and efficiently. When Zhan carried Yibo to his climax, all Yibo could do to stop himself from screaming out loud was biting down on Zhan’s shoulder.

Zhan hissed quietly at the sensation of Yibo’s teeth sinking into him and his warm cum all over his hand. He could feel Yibo’s entire body trembling and slowly pulled his hand out. Zhan waited for Yibo to sit up once again and when he did so, Zhan maintained eye contact with Yibo as he brought his hand up to his lips and licked all the cum off.

Yibo gulped and licked his own lips as he watched Zhan’s tongue lick his cum and swallow it down. His eyes lingered on Zhan’s lips that were wet and shiny and slightly parted, revealing his bunny teeth. All Yibo wanted to do at that moment was leap forward and devour those lips. 

As if sensing his intentions, Zhan gave him a warning look and leaned away. With a sigh, Yibo rested back against his seat and accepted the tissue Zhan handed him. After he felt clean enough and had zipped himself up, Yibo leaned closer to Zhan and placed a light kiss on his cheek.

”I love you…”

”I love you too,” Zhan nudged him away with a fond smile.

* * *

As they waited for their bags, Zhan and Yibo maintained a safe distance between them. Yibo was busy playing with his phone and Zhan looked around occasionally, tapping his feet to the music he was listening to. Both had their masks on. When the bags arrived, they helped each other adjust their bags and once they were ready to leave, they looked at each other quietly.

”I’ll be going this way,” Zhan pointed at the gate to the left. "The car’s waiting.”

”I’ll be going that way,” Yibo titled his face. “My driver and bodyguards are there.”

”I know we can't do anything,” Zhan whispered and smiled at Yibo, “but imagine me stepping closer and pulling you into my arms.”

”I know we can't do anything,” Yibo whispered back, “but imagine me kissing your lips softly, gently, endlessly.”

Zhan’s breath hitched as Yibo offered him his hand.

”I know we can't do anything,” Zhan clasped his hand and leaned forward to bump shoulders. ‘But imagine me deepening that kiss until all we can taste is each other.”

Yibo gulped as they bumped shoulders.

”I know we can't do anything,” Yibo murmured just before pulling back. “But imagine me wrapping my arms around your waist and holding you close as I say out loud...,” his voice reduced to a barely audible whisper, “I love you, Zhan-ge.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus ends the vacation! Hope you guys enjoyed the detour in the storyline. Now we're moving on to another detour - meet the fams and moving in - before we get back to the real timeline of their work interspersed with my fic!


	89. So who is this friend?

* * *

Two weeks went by quickly, their managers made sure they had enough work to do to make up for their vacation. Of course, neither team knew the destination or companion and Zhan and Yibo didn't plan on letting them know any time soon.

Even without the additional ammunition, Zhan was having enough trouble with his management. He was busy with work but the work itself was nowhere close to what he wanted out of his career. He was being put up for small insignificant crowd roles, for side roles that barely got any footage, he was given lesser priority with every audition and to make things worse, he wasn't succeeding at any more auditions.

After two weeks apart, when Zhan was finally headed to Yibo’s, he wanted to feel excited. But the only thought that roamed his head was that of resignation.

_It’s alright, Zhan. You have Jade Dynasty, Joy of Life and the Untamed. One of these has to do well….one of these will do well._

* * *

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo exclaimed as Zhan stood at his door, grinning.

He pulled him inside and hugged him tight, inhaling his scent for several seconds.

”I missed you so much, puppy,” Zhan sighed and placed kisses on Yibo’s cheek.

”Stop calling me that!” Yibo pulled back with a playful pout.

Zhan chuckled and pulled him into a kiss. As they melted into each other, both felt satisfied hearing the moans they had longed for for the past two weeks. After several minutes, they pulled back breathless and radiant.

”I missed you too, my cute bunny,” Yibo grinned.

Zhan rolled his eyes and walked to the couch, sitting down with a long sigh.

”Are you tired?” Yibo sat beside him and massaged his right arm.

”Mentally, more than physically,” Zhan rested his head against the back of the couch.

”Wajijiwa?”

”Auditions...but let’s not talk about all that...let’s talk about…”

”Chongqing?” Yibo bit his lips nervously.

”Yeah,” Zhan smiled at him, unsure but warm.

”So when are you going?” 

”Day after...and you’re coming the next day, right?”

”Yeah, right after the TTXS shoot...but I can only stay until the day after that…you’re coming back with me?”

”Yes,” Zhan nodded. “Can't stay long either.”

”Are you...nervous?”

”Very,” Zhan chuckled.

”What did you tell them…?”

”That a friend of mine will be in town for work...and I didn't want him to stay at a hotel…”

”Sounds innocent enough. Do you think they’ll suspect something?”

”I don't think so. I’ve had friends stay over before.” Zhan shrugged.

”What friends?” Yibo narrowed his eyes. “How many?”

”Yibo! They were just friends...it’s normal you know? For friends to come to another friend’s house.” Zhan rolled his eyes.

”Hmm,” Yibo thought over it and then leaned his head against Zhan’s shoulder and held onto his arm.

”My god, you are so possessive!” Zhan shook his head.

”How can I not be? Have you seen yourself? If I’m not careful, someone will take you away from me!!”

”Do you really think so?” Zhan’s voice softened as he tilted Yibo’s face towards him.

”No…,” Yibo shook his head slowly at first, “but I don't want to...lose you to someone else.”

”That’s not possible,” Zhan smiled and rubbed his nose against Yibo’s. “You’re not getting free of me that easily, Wang Yibo!” Zhan smiled mischievously as he pushed Yibo back onto the couch and lay on top of him.

”Fine by me,” Yibo groaned as Zhan’s teeth latched onto his neck and he tilted it to one side, giving Zhan more access. “That’s totally fine by me.”

* * *

Zhan knocked on the familiar door of his childhood home. He waited patiently as he heard footsteps making their way to the door.

”A-Zhan!!!” His mother exclaimed and rushed forward to hug him.

”Mama!” Zhan smiled brightly even as he felt tears well up in his eyes. 

”Come..come..come inside,” she dragged him by the arm. “Your papa and I have been waiting!”

”Sorry, the flight got delayed,” Zhan wrapped one arm around her shoulders and carried his bag with the other.

”No worries...as long as you’re safe and sound...freshen up, we’ll eat together,” she beamed at him.

Zhan walked to the balcony where his father sat, reading the newspaper. He knew exactly where to find him - in his favourite spot on the balcony swing.

”Papa,” Zhan stood beside him and smiled eagerly.

On seeing him, Zhan’s father stood up hurriedly and squeezed his shoulder. Zhan leaned forward into a short embrace and then pulled back and squeezed his shoulder back.

”Good to see you, A-Zhan,” his father gave him a warm smile that finally made Zhan feel like he was, indeed, after several months, home.

As they sat and ate dinner later that night, the conversation flowed smoothly. His mother updated him on everything from the family events to the rising price of vegetables. His father asked him about his work and health. Finally, his cat moved from the couch to his feet, indicating her forgiveness for him being away too long.

”So who is this friend?” Zhan’s mother asked out of the blue.

”Oh,” Zhan felt his heart skip a beat, “just a friend from work...I told you about Wang Yibo right? “

”Oh yes, from your latest drama? The one that hits you a lot?” She frowned.

”No, mama,” Zhan chuckled, “He doesn’t hit me that way...it’s all just friendly banter. With him, I get childish too.”

Noting the fondness in his voice, Zhan’s mother looked at him carefully for a moment before serving him some more food.

* * *

When Zhan was in bed that night, he could feel his heart racing as his mind counted down the hours to Yibo’s arrival. He could not think of what to say to his parents at dinner regarding Yibo.

 _Should I tell them before he comes or when he is here with me? Should I give them some indication? Should I talk to them separately?_ Zhan groaned and took his phone out.

> _Zhan: How was the shoot?  
>    
>  Bo-dI: Was fine...how was...dinner?  
>    
>  Zhan: Was fine...  
>    
>  Bo-di: Did you tell them?  
>    
>  Zhan: Not yet…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Do you want to do it together?  
>    
>  Zhan: That’s what I can’t decide!  
>    
>  Bo-di: We can do it together if that’ll make it easier for you 😘  
>    
>  Zhan: Okay, I guess we could do that.  
>    
>  Bo-di: I have to go now, ge...But I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah, can’t wait...😘  
>    
>  Bo-di: Don't worry yourself into a panic, okay? It’s going to be fine.  
>    
>  Zhan: I love you, didi  
>    
>  Bo-di: I love you too, ge. Good night! _

Zhan turned over and smiled.

_It’s going to be fine._

* * *

The next morning, Zhan helped his mother do the chores as his father went out to buy some groceries. When he returned with four bags stuffed with all kinds of vegetables and meat, Zhan turned to his mother and raised an eyebrow.

”What? I wanted to cook something special since we have a guest coming!”

”This is...a lot,” Zhan chuckled.

”I looked him up,” she replied almost smug, “He’s very good looking by the way,” she smirked. “I wanted to know where he is from, what he likes, since you’re not telling me anything!

”You looked him up online?!” Zhan blurted, trying not to blush at the comment about Yibo’s looks.

” So I can cook accordingly,” she shrugged.

”You should invite him more often,” Zhan’s father laughed. “So we can eat like this everyday!”

Zhan rolled his eyes and continued chopping the vegetables his mother had laid out for him. Every now and then, he glanced at her and noticed how she was smiling and humming. 

_Maybe this won't be as hard as I thought._

”Is he single?” His mother interrupted his thoughts.

”What?!” Zhan nearly cut his finger.

”Is Wang Yibo single? Is he as bad a son as you?” She pouted playfully.

”I…,” Zhan stuttered, not knowing how to reply.

Zhan had never lied to his family. He may have kept some things from them but if asked, he had never hidden the truth. 

I...don't think so...he isn't single.” Zhan replied firmly.

”Oh...and he’s younger than you! What’s your excuse Zhan-Zhan?” She shook her head with a sigh.

”I…,” Zhan felt something rise in him. “Actually...I’m not single either.”

Zhan felt his mother’s entire body still. Her hand stopped stirring. Her eyes stopped blinking. Her mouth stopped smiling. Slowly, she turned to him and Zhan couldn't make out the emotion in her eyes.

”You’re not single any more?” She spoke softly and then Zhan finally saw some expression on her face. It was hope.

”No…”

Suddenly, his mother’s animations returned and she attacked him with words.

”Who is she?! When did this happen?! Are you serious about her? Don’t joke around with me Xiao Zhan!”

Zhan swallowed the fear that his next words would make that hope and joy vanish. But before he could say anything more, she screamed at the top of her lungs.

”Xiao Zhan’s father, come in the kitchen RIGHT NOW. Your son has some very important good news!!”

_Fuck._

Zhan’s heart sank to his feet.

_Fuck fuck fuck._

”Why are you yelling!? Is everything okay?” Zhan’s father rushed in, rolling the newspaper as if ready to attack someone with it.

”Zhan-Zhan is seeing someone!” She ignored the frown on his face and jumped gleefully.

”Oh?” He raised his eyebrow at a flustered Zhan.

”Tell us more!” Zhan’s mother walked up to him and nudged him. “Go on…”

”I...umm...we…,” Zhan’s heart and mind were racing and before he knew what he was saying, the words left his mouth like a bullet train. “I’m in a relationship with Wang Yibo.”


	90. How can you be sure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: No hate on either of their families. The next few chapters are pure fiction. From what I've seen in videos, they are both very close to their parents and share a very loving relationship with them. I am especially fond of the stories Zhan-Zhan shares of his mother. She sounds like a laugh riot! So once again, this is all fiction and for the sake of the plot. No one is a villain in this story.
> 
> P. S. Boom. Couldn't resist posting the next chapter so doing it early :P

* * *

“I’m in a relationship with Wang Yibo.”

Zhan shut his eyes, horrified at what he had just blurted. He felt his heart stop beating altogether and waited with bated breath, anticipating what was to come next.

”But…,” his mother was the first to speak, “but you dated girls before…,” she sounded utterly confused.

”I did,” Zhan opened his eyes and looked at her hesitantly.

”And Wang Yibo is a boy,” she continued.

”He is…”

”But you aren’t...gay,” she spoke after a long pause. “Are you?”

”I…,” Zhan gulped as he saw the confusion and pain in her eyes. “I...love him, mama.”

”How is that possible?” Zhan’s father spoke finally. “You never dated men before. You liked girls.”

”Did the entertainment industry make you gay? I’ve heard a lot of the actors are gay!” His mother’s voice became shrill.

”That’s...that’s not how it works, mama...and papa, I didn't like them because they are girls...and I don't like Wang Yibo because he is a boy...I just...I just like him. For who he is.”

”How can you be sure?!” 

Zhan looked at them in disbelief. It was like they didn't understand anything he was saying. His mind couldn't come up with the words to answer their questions. Their faces were bewildered and astonished and perplexed. It dawned on him that nothing he could do or say would help them comprehend what he was trying to convey.

_But I’m not giving up. Yibo is the most important thing in my life and my parents will have to acknowledge it, if not understand it._

”In the same way you can be sure that you love me or papa. I can feel it in my heart. I just know. I’ve known him for almost a year now. He’s been there for me during the hardest of times. He has helped me. A lot. I care about him a lot. He is like family to me, mama. Does that answer your question?” 

Both his parents stood there in silence. Stunned as they were, they looked at each other and then back at Zhan. For several minutes, the silence was unbroken. Zhan waited patiently. His resolve had grown once he had started talking about Yibo and now his heart was sure and steady once more.

”Mama, papa,” Zhan broke the silence when no one spoke. “I wanted you to know about this from me. Because...I have asked him to move in with me.”

”What?!” They both exclaimed in unison. 

”Xiao Zhan! Have you thought about this?!”

”You know me well,” Zhan looked at them pointedly. “What do you think?”

”Weren’t you the one who told us that your career would be over if you started dating?”

”Yes, and that is a huge risk. But I am also not someone who will let something precious go. I see how happy you are. I want that too. I don't want to be on the top one day, all alone. I want to have a partner. And Wang Yibo _is_ that partner. I am willing to take this risk for him.”

They took a few more minutes to digest everything Zhan was saying but before anything else could be said, the doorbell rang.

”That must be him,” Zhan placed the knife down. “I’m sorry I brought this up so abruptly...but you asked and I couldn't lie...I know you’re still not...but please be nice to him.”

When they nodded quietly, Zhan took a deep breath and walked away.

* * *

Yibo waited outside the door impatient and nervous. He kept checking his phone and adjusting his clothes, unsure of who would come to open the door. When no one came, he hesitated but decided to ring the doorbell again.

Before he could do so, however, the door opened and Yibo smiled in relief as he saw Zhan on the other side. But his smile slowly diminished when he saw the look on Zhan’s face which was somewhere between despair and exhaustion.

”Hi,” Zhan managed a smile as he opened the door wide to let Yibo in.

”Hey,” Yibo smiled back softly and picked up his bag.

As if having a second thought, Zhan stepped out and closed the door behind him. He stared at Yibo for a few seconds and then wrapped his arms around him in a gentle hug.

”You told them, didn't you?” Yibo asked softly, massaging Zhan’s back.

Zhan nodded.

”It isn't looking too good, is it?”

Zhan shook his head, still silent.

”It’s okay...I’m here now...we’ll face whatever it is together.”

Zhan pulled back and wiped the corner of his eyes. He nodded and then with a long exhale, opened the door again and let Yibo in.

When they reached the end of the hallway, Zhan noticed that his parents had moved to the living room and were now seated on the couch. Zhan cleared his throat, drawing their attention to him and then gestured to Wang Yibo. 

Yibo stepped forward and bowed at both of them and with a bright smile greeted them.

"Hello Uncle...hello Aunty...I’m Wang Yibo...thank you for welcoming me to your home.”

Zhan’s mother couldn't help but smile a bit at the bright face greeting her. She stood and walked over to Yibo.

”It’s nice to meet you too, Wang Yibo,” she patted his arms and bowed a little.

”You can call me Yibo, aunty.” Yibo grinned, prompting Zhan’s mother’s smile to widen.

Zhan watched, confused, as the two exchanged pleasantries and his mother made casual conversation as if the last half an hour had not happened. He glanced at his father, who was also equally confused but eventually, stood up with a sigh and walked over to join them.

”Welcome, Yibo,” he bowed politely.

”Thank you,” Yibo bowed again.

”We were just preparing lunch,” Zhan’s mother continued. “Did you have anything to eat yet?”

”I ate on the flight here,” Yibo nodded with a smile.

”That won't do! I’ll prepare lunch quickly,” she clucked her tongue.

”I’ve heard great things about your cooking, aunty. Can't wait!”

The whole time, neither of them, not even Yibo, looked in the direction of a very bewildered Zhan. Zhan couldn't follow how the events had taken the turn they had. As he continued hearing the conversation between Yibo and his mother as she led him to the kitchen to watch her cook which he apparently had insisted on doing, it dawned on Zhan. He peeked from around the kitchen door and saw Yibo grin wide, laugh whole heartedly, nod along to every word his mother uttered, and beam with joy with every taste test he was given.

_Is he...sucking up to my mother?!?_ Zhan gasped inwardly. _How is he, who is normally soooo socially awkward, so good at wooing my mom!??!!?_

Zhan felt a hand on his arm and turned around to see his father.

”Let them be,” he whispered in a low voice, “I want to speak with you.”


	91. None of the other stuff would matter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boom! Another chapter. Somebody stop me!

* * *

”So...that boy seems to be a natural smooth talker,” Zhan’s father huffed as he sat down on the balcony swing.

”That’s actually the opposite of how he is in public...if only you knew,” Zhan shook his head and took the seat beside him.

They swayed back and forth for several seconds before Zhan’s father broke the silence.

”You know we love you, right?”

Zhan nodded.

”And we’re only concerned about you and your well-being and...safety."

Zhan nodded slowly.

”Are you sure about this….about him?”

”Even more sure than I was when I decided to join the entertainment industry.”

”Hmm,” his father seemed to ponder over his words.

”I don't want to hurt you both,” Zhan began but felt himself choke on his emotions. “I...don't want to disappoint you.”

They remained in silence a while longer and Zhan felt his heart break at the lack of response.

”It’ll take us...it’ll take me...some time.”

Zhan felt himself tear up. He knew what his father said was fair but a part of him had hoped that their love for him would be unconditional and willing to accept his relationship immediately.

”If you try to get to know him...none of the other stuff would matter,” Zhan spoke in a low barely audible voice and then stood up and left.

He went into his room and closed the door behind him. He massaged his chest as he felt it tighten. He tried counting to ten, he tried taking in deep breaths, he even tried picturing Yibo smiling at him. But nothing worked. He walked to his bed and sat at the edge, clutching his chest and trying to relax his breathing and his racing mind.

”I’ll call Zhan-ge,” he heard Yibo’s voice in the distance.

”His room is the second door on the right,” his mother’s voice chirped in response.

Zhan closed his eyes, trying to return to normalcy before Yibo found him. But it was in vain.

”Zhan-ge?!” Yibo’s startled voice entered his room and he felt two arms around his shoulders and a gentle presence kneeling in front of him. “Are you alright?!”

”’I’m fine….”

”You’re not...what can I do,” Yibo whispered as he caressed Zhan’s hand that was on his chest.

Zhan didn't say anything, but just kept looking at Yibo with tears in his eyes.

”He said he needs time…,” Zhan murmured, heart broken.

”Then we will give him time,” Yibo placed a kiss on Zhan’s cheek and wiped his tears. “That changes nothing between us.”

”I thought their love for me was unconditional,” Zhan’s tears flowed freely as his breathing became shallower.

”It is...just like my love for you...they just need time to wrap their heads around something so new and unexpected,” Yibo massaged Zhan’s back.

”He couldn't even look at me properly…,” Zhan started gasping for air.

”Hey,” Yibo held Zhan’s face, “look at me. Look at me, sweetheart,” Yibo tilted his face up. “I’m right here. Nothing bad is going to happen. You’re safe. Just breathe with me. Breathe in, breathe out,” Yibo gestured with his hand, “That’s all that matters right now. Just breathe with me.”

Zhan nodded and followed Yibo’s rhythm. At first his inhales were broken and uneven but eventually, they began evening out. After several minutes, Zhan could finally feel his breaths reach all the way to his stomach and coming back out naturally.

”Are you okay?” Yibo looked at him worriedly, but tried to stay as calm as possible.

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded slowly.

”Can you...stand?”

”Yeah,” Zhan gave him a small smile. “I just need a minute.”

”I’ll go get some water, okay?” Yibo turned to the door but paused and looked back nervously, “Keep breathing...can you do that for me?”

”Yes, Bo-di,” Zhan smiled wider.

Yibo stepped out hesitantly but as soon as he turned into the corridor, he froze in his spot as he saw Zhan’s mother standing outside. He was unable to move, frantically thinking of some excuse to give so she wouldn't enter the room and see a distraught Zhan. Worse still, he was worried that she was getting the wrong impression when he stayed in Zhan’s room for such a long time.

To his surprise, she stepped closer and placed a hand on his cheek and he saw tears shining in her eyes. 

”Thank you,” she whispered and placed a kiss on his cheek. 

* * *

Zhan looked up when he heard the door open again but to his shock, it was his mother who walked in, followed by a smiling Yibo. She handed him a glass of water and sat beside him on the bed.

There was silence in the room and Zhan felt his heart race. She leaned forward and placed a kiss on Zhan’s temple and Zhan saw tears flowing down her cheeks.

”Mama…!? Please don't cry...I’m sorry I upset you...I’m sorry I disappointed you and papa,” Zhan spoke hastily. “Please don't…”

”Hush…,” she shook her head with a smile. “My sweet boy. I love you so much. I am so proud of you. You’re always going to be my sweet baby, Zhan-Zhan.”

And that did it. Zhan lowered himself into her embrace and rested his head against her chest, weeping. He bent forward and wrapped his arms around her waist tightly and sobbed into her lap.

She looked up at Yibo and beckoned him to come closer with her hand stretched out. Yibo took the hand offered to him and smiled when he noticed how small it was.

_So this is where he gets his soft small hands from._ Yibo grinned.

Yibo knelt by them and gazed at Zhan affectionately. He sighed as she placed her hand on his head, gently massaging his hair.

”Now I have two sons,” she whispered and Zhan felt his heart overflow and burst with relief and happiness.

* * *

When Zhan and the rest emerged from his room and entered the dining room, they saw Zhan’s father setting the table. No questions were asked and everyone sat quietly as he poured water into four glasses. Zhan’s mother took the seat beside him and Zhan and Yibo sat opposite them, beside each other.

”I know you don't eat too spicy food...but you like sour food, right?” Zhan’s mother smiled as she began serving.

”How did you know that?” Yibo’s eyes widened.

”She stalked you online once I told her you were coming,” Zhan chuckled softly, occasionally glancing at his father who sat silently while passing the dishes around.

”That’s….sweet,” Yibo smirked and served both him and Zhan the dish he was handed.

”Have some more...both of you are so thin,” she insisted with a frown.

”We have to be careful with our weight,” Zhan sighed.

”Yeah, doesn’t look good in photoshoots,” Yibo pursed his lips, frowning as well.

Zhan’s father still hadn't spoken and Zhan felt his heart sink a little. Discreetly, he grabbed the edge of Yibo’s pants for comfort and noticed Yibo sliding closer to allow him more access.

As the lunch progressed, the chatter between the three of them grew louder and more natural. Eventually, he stopped bothering with his father’s silence as he noticed Yibo and his mother interact and the way their faces lit up. 

”I can help clean up,” Yibo stood up when they were done.

”No need, Zhan-Zhan can help me,” Zhan’s mother shook her head and gestured to Zhan.

”Yeah, you must be tired,” Zhan stood up and began gathering the plates.

”I’m really not tire…”

”Why don’t you come help me with something…”

Everyone stopped what they were doing as Zhan’s father finally spoke.

”Uhh...yeah...sure,” Yibo replied.

”No,” Zhan spoke as calmly as he could. “I can help you, Yibo can help mama.”

”Let him,” Zhan’s mother interrupted and placed a hand on Zhan’s arm.

She glanced at Zhan’s father and smiled at him affectionately, squeezing his shoulder. He nodded back and then. clearing throat, addressed Yibo once more.

”I...I need help moving some things from the garage to the study...if that’s okay with you.”

”Sure,” Yibo stepped towards him hastily only to bump his hip against the chair. “Oww...I mean...yes, I don't mind,” he winced.

”Good,” Zhan’s father led the way out as Zhan watched, gripping the plates anxiously.


	92. He's always been so brave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I have a problem. I can't stop posting today!! ||_||

* * *

”We just need to move these boxes to the study,” Zhan’s father pointed. “They’re not too heavy...”

”Sure,” Yibo nodded eagerly.

The next twenty minutes passed in silence as they moved the boxes together to the study which was at the other end of the house. They accessed it using the back stairs that led straight from the garage to that end of the upper floor, bypassing the living room.

Once all the boxes were moved, Yibo helped him unpack and arrange the items. To his surprise, they were personal family albums and all of Zhan’s old drawings and design awards.

”We converted his studio into a study for me,” he finally broke the silence as they arranged the awards on the shelf. “That’s why all this was downstairs...now that it’s ready, I wanted to…,” Yibo thought he saw his lips quiver with emotion.

 _He probably gets his emotional side from his father._ Yibo observed.

”Ever since he was a child, Zhan has always been kind and sweet and considerate. But there’s also a stern, disciplined and ambitious side to him. He was always the perfect son,” Zhan’s father began reminiscing as he flipped through an album.

”Look,” he pointed to a photo and Yibo walked over to see it. “This was after he won his first competition. He was so proud. We were so proud.”

”I’m sure you were,” Yibo spoke softly as Zhan’s father ran his fingers over the photo lovingly.

”And this was when he opened his design studio with his friends. We were all so worried. It was such a risk. But Zhan-Zhan was sure. He won us all over with his dedication and hard work. And proved that he was right.”

”Must have taken him a lot of courage to do that,” Yibo watched carefully as Zhan’s father swallowed his emotions.

”Yes,” he replied after several seconds. “He’s always been so brave. Starting a whole new career at 24. Giving up the stability...and safety of his regular life here.”

Yibo felt something shift in the room when Zhan’s father turned to look at him. His eyes were shiny and there was a soft vulnerability on his face.

”I feel...I feel like I should be able to trust him even now. He has proven time and again that his judgement is sound and reliable...but…”

Yibo waited patiently again, never once flinching from his stare.

”But this time, I feel like if something goes wrong I won't be able to help him.”

Yibo finally understood what was holding the man back. Unlike the risks Zhan had taken earlier where he could always come back home and fall back on his previous life and career as his back up, the risk that they were taking now had no turning back. If word got out about their relationship, not only would their careers be ruined but their whole life would change forever. 

”The way I see it,” Yibo finally spoke, “is that it is at times like these...that we need the support of our loved ones the most.”

Zhan’s father stared at Yibo for a few more seconds and then shifted his gaze to a photo of Zhan as a young child, sitting on his father’s shoulder. 

”He used to love sitting on my shoulder,” he spoke fondly.

”I’m sure he would love to even now although I imagine you wouldn’t,” Yibo cackled before he could even think of what he was saying.

Yibo froze in panic and horror, mortified at his timing.

_Wow. What the fuck is wrong with you!? Joking at a moment like this?!! Fucking moron._

Yibo gulped and looked at Zhan’s father, dreading his next words. To his utter shock, Zhan’s father looked at him and immediately broke into a smile. Yibo realized for the first time, that Zhan got his smile from his father.

”That’s true. He’s way too tall,” his eyes lit up as he looked at Yibo. “Ever since he hit puberty, he shot up like a tree, all lanky and clumsy,” he chuckled. “He used to walk in such a funny manner and when he was in the school dances, he stood out on stage which he hated because he danced also clumsily.”

Within seconds, the chuckles turned into loud laughter and Yibo couldn't help but giggle along as he imagined a clumsy self conscious teenage Zhan.

”And all this with his bunny teeth!” Zhan’s father roared with laughter. “Here...I’ll show you this one photo…,” he flipped through another album, “See...this...we dressed him up as a bunny on his sixth birthday...he hates it when I show this photo to his friends…”

The laughter died with that word as Zhan’s father lingered over it over and over in his head. Yibo shifted uncomfortably as he felt the atmosphere return to its initial uncomfortable silence.

”I guess…,” Zhan’s father took a deep breath and managed a smile at Yibo, “he would hate it if I showed this photo to his boyfriend too.”

Yibo’s eyes widened at the words. He couldn't believe his ears and his jaw dropped open.

”I...I guess he would,” Yibo managed to say.

Zhan’s father patted Yibo’s arm and handed him the album. 

”This goes over there,” he pointed and Yibo did as he was told.

* * *

Zhan was sitting at the coffee table sipping tea with his mom when he heard the approaching footsteps. He looked up nervously to see a radiant Yibo walking in with his father who had a small smile on his face.

”All done,” his father announced as they joined them around the coffee table. “I’m satisfied with it,” he looked pointedly at Zhan as if sending a message. “And Yibo helped a lot.”

Zhan’s heart skipped a beat as he looked at Yibo who gave him a slight nod. He felt his nervousness subside slowly as his father settled in beside him on the couch while Yibo opposite them on the floor beside his mother.

”How about a round of cards?” Zhan’s father proposed with a smirk. “Up for it, Zhan-Zhan?”

”What are you so happy about? You always lose,” Zhan narrowed his eyes.

”I have a feeling I’ll win this time. How about Yibo and me against you and your mother?” 

Zhan looked at him then Yibo then him again, astonished. 

_What the fuck changed?! Why are they so chummy suddenly?_

”Uhh...sure,” Zhan mumbled.

Yibo took the cards Zhan’s father handed him and began distributing them evenly.

”We’ll start,” Zhan’s father stated.

”No, we will,” Zhan replied.

”How about rock, paper, scissors?” Zhan’s father held out his fist with another smirk.

”Wha...why that?” Zhan’s eyes widened at the unexpected suggestion. 

He jerked his eyes to Yibo who looked away and pursed his lips, pretending to not notice anything.

”Because…,” Zhan’s father winked at Yibo who winked back, “I know the trick to win.”

”Wha...what’s the trick!? Yibo!!” He turned to him in shock. “Is there a trick...is that how you always beat me?! You cheater!”

”Hey, it’s not cheating if it’s fair and square.” Yibo held up both arms in his defense.

”What is it?!” Zhan demanded.

”Not telling you, ge,” Yibo cackled like a brat and high fived Zhan’s father who had held his hand up, laughing along.


	93. This is my family

* * *

The rest of the day went smoothly enough. They spent the time playing cards, Zhan’s mother recruited them in helping with the garden, his father made use of the presence of two tall boys and made them move and arrange a ton of things that were higher up, they went through the old photo albums much to Zhan’s embarrassment, and they had a merry time chatting in general.

By the time dinner was done, Zhan’s heart felt much lighter and he gazed at them all fondly.

_This is my family. It’s almost complete now._ Zhan blinked in surprise at his own thought but didn't probe further for its meaning.

”Come on, A-Bo,” Zhan’s mother addressed him affectionately, “let me show you your room.”

Zhan and Yibo followed her to the guest room and Yibo placed his bag beside the bed when she turned the light on and went ahead and drew the curtains and opened the window. Zhan stood at the entrance, leaning against the doorway, arms crossed his chest. 

”You must be tired,” she held Yibo’s hands and patted them. “Get some rest.”

”Thank you,” Yibo beamed.

We are in the room beside the study if you need anything. And Zhan’s room is right beside yours. Don't hesitate to ask, okay?”

Yibo nodded as she smiled at him once more and made her way towards the door. She stopped beside Zhan and patted his cheek before poking him in the chest with her forefinger.

”And both of you,” she looked at Yibo as she continued her poking, “Behave.”

Zhan immediately blushed and Yibo choked at her words. She laughed at the flustered boys and with a wave, left the room. For a few minutes, Zhan and Yibo couldn't meet each other’s eyes. Eventually, though, they did and immediately broke into a fit of giggles.

Zhan shook his head and walked in, closing the door behind him.

”Xiao Zhan!” Yibo held his hand to his chest as if scandalized. “What will they think if they see the door closed?!”

Zhan giggled at his expression.

”My reputation will be ruined! The reputation I worked so hard to build.”

At those words, Zhan’s face softened and his smile diminished as he thought over the events of the very long and emotionally draining day. Yibo noticed the change and immediately stopped his teasing. He closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around Zhan’s shoulders, pulling him closer.

”Thank you for what you did, Bo-di,” Zhan began. “I don't know how you did it. But you did it. They accepted this...me...us...all because of you.”

”I _am_ very lovable, ge,” Yibo said smugly, prompting Zhan to chuckle and poke him in the side.

”But seriously,” Zhan pulled back and wiped his eyes that were beginning to tear up again, “thank you.”

Zhan smiled as Yibo brushed a strand of his hair away from his forehead and placed a kiss on it. He didn't let Yibo pull away completely and caught his lips in his instead. Yibo sighed as he finally got what he was waiting for the whole day. He melted into the kiss as Zhan pulled him closer and tightened his arms around his waist. 

They let out soft moans and sighs for the next several minutes as they played with each other’s lips gently, licked each other thoroughly, lapped at each other’s tongues until they finally had to surface for air.

”I love you so much,” Zhan rested his forehead against Yibo’s and let out a long exhale.

”I love you more,” Yibo kissed the tip of his nose.

”Not possible.” Zhan grinned.

Zhan walked them backwards until the back of Yibo’s knees hit the bed. He leaned over him, pushing him onto the bed. 

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispered as Zhan lay him down and climbed on top. “Your parents are…,” he trembled as Zhan kissed the side of his neck lovingly.

”They’re all the way across the living room,” Zhan breathed against Yibo’s pulse.

”But, ge...is it...I don't want them to even accidentally…,” Yibo gently placed his hands on Zhan’s chest, giving him an apologetic smile.

”Fine,” Zhan smiled and bit Yibo’s cheek. “You’ve worked hard to get them to love you…”

”I did work _very hard_ ,” Yibo smirked. “Maybe you can reward me on the flight back tomorrow?”

”Oh god,” Zhan chuckled and sat up, “I’ve created a monster!”

Yibo sat up and giggled as he wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist. He leaned forward and bit Zhan’s chest.

”That’s no way to prevent me from fucking you right here right now, didi,” Zhan ran his thumb over Yibo’s lower lip, his eyes darkening.

”Fuck,” Yibo gulped and stopped his teasing immediately. “No, ge...please…”

”You begging me to stop isn't helping either,” Zhan licked Yibo’s ear.

”Okay, ge...sorry...please…,” Yibo murmured.

”Please, what, didi?” Zhan purred as he licked his way down Yibo’s jawline. “Please fuck me or please don't?”

Yibo had never found it so hard to get one word out of his mouth. He trembled under Zhan’s touch as he mustered the will power to say something but just then, Zhan moved his hips ever so slightly, grinding down on Yibo’s half erect dick.

”Ahh,” Yibo moaned.

Before he could say or do anything more, Zhan sat back abruptly and very nonchalantly dropped his shoulders.

”Well,” Zhan stood up quickly and adjusted his clothes, “you’re right, we shouldn't take the risk after everything that we’ve managed to achieve today.” Zhan winked with a teasing smile.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo grunted and stood up.

Zhan chuckled and held Yibo’s face in his hands. 

”I love you so much...and I feel much better now,” he smiled.

”I told you he loved you unconditionally. See, he didn't even need that much time. And whatever else they still have to come to terms with, it’ll happen slowly as well.”

”Yeah,” Zhan nodded and beamed. “You’re right.”

”But Zhan-ge,” Yibo’s voice grew low and concerned. “You need to…”

”Need to what, didi?”

”Need to remember to keep breathing,” Yibo whispered as he brushed one finger against Zhan’s soft cheek.

”I will, sweetie,” Zhan held the finger in his hand, “I will.”

”You sure you’re okay now?” Yibo kissed Zhan’s hand.

”I’m more than okay now, Yibo. I’m perfectly happy and madly in love.”

”So cheesy, ge,” Yibo grinned.

”Only for you, didi,” Zhan grinned back.

”Hey! That’s my line!” Bo-di exclaimed with a chuckle.

* * *

The next evening, Yibo and Zhan were allowed to leave only after several hugs and kisses, multiple goodbyes, and a teary farewell. Yibo’s heart warmed when he was embraced tightly by both Zhan’s mother and father. He felt himself tear up as she constantly told him to take better care of himself and keep in touch. He smiled brightly as Zhan wrapped one arm around his shoulder and squeezed it as he promised them that they would visit again soon.

Their plans had changed due to some scheduling mistakes on the part of Yibo’s manager and on a whim, riding the high of the success with Zhan’s parent’s, they decided to fly straight to Luoyang which was just a two hour flight away.

”Okay, then…,” Yibo took in a deep breath as he buckled himself in, “time to face my parents.”

”Whatever happens,” Zhan squeezed his arm as the plane began taking off, “I’m right here. We’ll face them together.”

Yibo nodded nervously. He didn't meet his family as often as Zhan did and had lived away from them from a much younger age. Although he loved them dearly and always had a fun time going back home, he had never discussed extremely personal things with them, let alone his sexual orientation.

_This is going to be difficult._ Yibo thought, biting his lips. _How am I going to tell them I’m gay? They are going to be shocked out of their wits. They’re going to have so many questions. Will they accept Zhan-ge? Will they accept me?_


	94. Did you not know?

* * *

”Wait, so you’re telling us we were supposed to think you were straight?”

”Wha...what do you mean...did you always think I’m…”

”Gay?” Yeah! I mean...was it...a secret...or did you not know?”

”Mom!!!!” Yibo howled. “What the…”

”Mind your language mister.” Yibo’s dad gave him a stern look.

”I can't believe you guys thought…”

”But technically we weren’t wrong...we were just…,” Yibo’s dad grinned.

”Smarter than you,” Yibo’s mom shook her head in amusement.

Zhan watched, stunned and internally completely losing his shit as the conversation between Yibo and his parents unfolded. It took all his will power to keep his laughter inside or he knew he would have to face Yibo’s wrath.

It had barely been four hours since they reached Yibo’s home. He had been greeted warmly by both parents and immediately given a tour of the huge house and shown to one of the guest rooms that was close to Yibo’s room. It was early evening and after he had freshened up, they had been served dinner.

Yibo’s family was rich. His father was a businessman and a successful one at that. That explained a lot about Yibo’s attitude and personality. But both his parents were down to earth and humble. That also explained a lot about his personality. 

After dinner was done, tea was served and they had sat in the living room, chatting merrily when Yibo’s mom had teased him about his chemistry with one of the girls that he had danced with on a TTXS episode.

Zhan grit his teeth lightly but managed a smile at the lighthearted teasing that ensued. And then all of a sudden, Yibo had blurted out that he was gay. And that was how Zhan had found himself in the present situation, with a very annoyed Yibo and his very confused and amused parents.

”But you were just teasing me about a girl!?”

”That’s because you get flustered so easily, Bo-Bo!”

”Don't call me that!” Yibo flushed even more and finally glanced at Zhan who rolled his lips inward and looked down at his tea in a desperate attempt to not laugh.

”Why? Because your boyfriend here will start calling you that?” Yibo’s mother winked.

”Who said anything about Zhan-ge being my boyfriend?!” Yibo exclaimed.

”Oh, please,” she rolled her eyes, “it’s so obvious. You have never even brought your Uniq friends over...and we were sure at one point that you were dating Wenhan...what with all your on camera shenanigans.”

”Mom!” Yibo looked at Zhan immediately.

Zhan raised an eyebrow and gave Yibo a look that said _‘this again?’_.” 

”It was all fake, ge,” Yibo muttered with pleading eyes.

”And now you show up with him and announce that you’re gay,” she continued.

”Okay, fine,” Yibo threw up his arms in surrender. “Yes, we are in a relationship.”

”How long?”

”Five months now, but we’ve known each for almost a year.”

”Congratulations, Xiao Zhan,” she winked. “You’ve tolerated this brat for so long?!”

”Mom!” Yibo exclaimed once again, his voice only growing louder as he dragged his hands down his face. “Can you stop?”

”Wow,” she placed her hands on her ears, “stop yelling like a baby throwing a tantrum, Bo-Bo!”

Yibo dropped his forehead to the table with a thud, exasperated, and that did it. Zhan burst into laughter and rolled to one side, clutching his stomach. Yibo groaned as Zhan doubled down and was joined by his own mother while his father began chuckling as well.

”Oh my sweet baby Yibo,” she walked up to him and knelt in front of him, placing both hands on his cheeks. “I love you...we both do. And I’m glad you told us and brought him over. I’m so glad we got to meet you, A-Zhan,” she turned her attention to Zhan who finally sat up and wiped his eyes.

”Trust me,” Zhan managed to say still catching his breath, “I’m the one who’s glad I came here and got to witness this,” he giggled again.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo pouted. “Why is everyone poking fun at me!?”

”Ah, no one is making fun of you,” Zhan smiled, cheekily,”Bo-Bo!”

Yibo had had enough. He reached forward and smacked Zhan on the arm.

”Oww! Didi!” Zhan rubbed his arm and smacked Yibo in return.

The two were about to descend into a bout of smacks when Yibo’s mom intervened.

”Wow, Zhan-Zhan! You’re supposed to be the older one and you’re being so childish. I see now why Yibo likes you...apart from those devastating good looks.”

”Uh...aunty!” Zhan blushed heavily and looked away, rubbing the back of his neck.

”Keep going, mom,” Yibo smirked. “Zhan-ge can't handle being complimented.”

Much to Zhan’s distress, Yibo and his mother lavished him with praises for the next several minutes, commenting on his height, his skin, his hair, his voice. Yibo proceeded to play some of his songs and his mom gasped and cooed at Zhan.

_So he gets his naughtiness from his mother!_ Zhan grumbled internally.

”Okay, that’s enough,” Yibo’s father finally intervened. “Leave the poor boy alone.”

Zhan turned his gaze to Yibo’s dad and threw him a grateful smile, which was returned generously.

_And he gets his softness and gentle side from his dad._

”Alright, alright,” Yibo’s mom ruffled his hair and then sat back on the couch beside his dad. 

”I think we’ll turn in now...I mean...I’ll turn in now,” Yibo flushed as he caught himself a little too late.

His mom raised an eyebrow and nodded with a smile and then looked at Zhan.

”I suppose you need to turn in too then?” She spoke in a soft yet teasing manner.

”I…,” Zhan fumbled for words, “I…”

”Yes, he does,” Yibo finally huffed and yanked Zhan up by the arm. “Goodnight,” he announced and dragged an embarrassed Zhan with him.

* * *

”Wow,” Zhan exhaled once they were in Yibo’s room that was opposite his own guest room. “That went...way better than expected.”

”Are you kidding?” Yibo whined. “It was horrible!”

”Really? It could have been much more horrible,” Zhan gave Yibo a knowing look.

”Yeah, I guess,” Yibo fell back onto his bed with a long sigh. “Whatever, this was so anticlimactic.”

”Are you saying you wanted more drama?!”

”Yes...no...I mean something maybe…I was so ready with a whole speech!!”

”If you’re looking for some excitement…”

Yibo sat himself up on his elbows and narrowed his eyes at Zhan.

”I can give you some excitement…”

”What are you talking about?”

”Keep your door unlocked, didi,” Zhan bent forward and whispered in Yibo’s ear. 

Yibo felt a shiver run down his spine. He gulped and nodded eagerly.

”Not scared of the consequences in your own home, Bo-di?” Zhan chuckled.

”They literally stay one floor away,” Yibo grinned.

”Looks like I hit the jackpot...handsome and rich.” Zhan winked.

”I knew you were with me only for my good looks and money.”

”Oh, there’s another reason too.”

”Yeah?”

”Yeah…,” Zhan nodded and ran a finger down Yibo’s body.

”What’s the other reason, gege?”

”Your Big. Thick. Dick.” Zhan licked his lips slowly, intentionally hovering his finger over Yibo’s growing erection.

”Fuck,” Yibo muttered and watched hungrily as Zhan stood up and left the room, looking over his shoulder with a smirk, before closing the door behind him.


	95. A little too good

* * *

Yibo tossed and turned in his bed. It was past midnight yet there was no sight of Zhan. 

_Maybe I should go to his room. No...what if he’s asleep. Then I’ll kill him for turning me on and leaving me hanging. But he’s had a rough few days._

Yibo sighed and chuckled. He relaxed his body and took in a few deep breaths, readying himself to sleep. He had barely closed his eyes when he thought he heard a shuffle at his door. Before he could even look properly in the direction of the sound, he felt a presence on top of him, a hand on his mouth and a figure lean over and switch his lamp off. 

He felt his heart stop as darkness surrounded him. 

”Shh...it’s okay,” a familiar deep voice whispered in his ear. “I’m here, didi…”

”Zha...Zhan-ge?”

”Mmm,” Zhan purred as he nuzzled his face in the crook of Yibo’s neck.

He could feel Yibo’s heart race and he knew the darkness made him nervous. But it only made him smirk as he pulled out an object from his back pocket.

Yibo felt a soft fabric rub against his face gently. He began reaching out to catch it, but immediately a hand caught hold of his wrist and pinned it above his head. The fabric moved away and another hand did the same with his other wrist. One hand secured both his wrists firmly while the other resumed gliding the fabric over his skin. 

”Di-di,” Zhan murmured seductively, “can you do something for me?”

”Hmm,” Yibo swallowed, his eyes still trying to adjust to the dark.

”Don’t move at all,” Zhan instructed in a soft yet stern voice.

Yibo’s breathing became heavier and he nodded. As soon as he had responded, he felt his wrists being released. He kept them still over his head, his mind racing as to what would happen next.

”Good boy,” Zhan’s lips whispered dangerously close to Yibo’s trembling lips.

Yibo felt the fabric being dragged across his lips, grazing his cheek, until it was around his eyes.

_Fuck._ Yibo’s mind malfunctioned. _Fuck._

He felt nimble fingers secure the cloth around Yibo’s eyes and tie the ends quickly. Two fingers tested the knot and the tightness of the cloth and then Yibo felt Zhan lower his face next to Yibo’s ear while his hands slid under his shirt and caressed his skin.

”I can't wait to eat you up...and then fuck you raw.”

Yibo’s entire body shuddered at those words. His mind went into a tizzy imagining all the things that would happen next. He tried imagining what they looked like right now. What he looked like right now, blindfolded and helpless. What Zhan was wearing. From what he could tell, he still had all his clothes on.

But the fingers were making quick work of removing his pants and then his shirt. With his sight completely blocked, Yibo could feel every touch tenfold. He felt goosebumps travel across his skin wherever Zhan touched him. He let out a soft moan as Zhan ran his hands over his body once all the clothes were off.

”Yibo, ah Yibo,” Zhan clucked his tongue softly and leaned forward again. “Don't make any noise otherwise,” Zhan leaned closer and bit his lower lip, “your parents will walk in on us fucking.”

Yibo gulped long and hard as his dick twitched at the images Zhan was conjuring in his mind. But he managed to suppress his moans.

”There,” Zhan spoke soothingly, “that’s better...nod if you’re okay, sweetie,” Zhan caressed his chin.

Yibo nodded eagerly and stretched his hands out to reach for Zhan. Zhan slapped both the hands away gently and sat on Yibo’s lap, pinning his arms above his head again.

”My good boy,” Zhan murmured as he placed kisses on Yibo’s cheeks, “You were so good in my home...a little too good,” he bit down on Yibo’s cheek prompting Yibo’s face to fall to one side.

”I touched myself that night when you refused to fuck me,” Zhan licked his way down Yibo’s neck. “I thought of you...like this,” Zhan sunk his teeth into Yibo’s pulse.

Yibo felt his dick reach full erection as Zhan continued whispering.

”I came really hard...but I still wasn't satisfied,” Zhan placed a kiss on the bruise he had just made. “But seeing you like this now….I know I’m going to come so much more...inside you...all over you...you want that right, didi?” Zhan ended the question in a sickeningly sweet tone.

Yibo nodded furiously and whimpered.

”Good boy,” Zhan smiled against his skin as he made his way down Yibo’s chest. 

He took a nipple in his mouth, toying at it with his teeth until it perked up and then he turned his attention to the other one. He lapped at it and nibbled it, turning it pink and erect.

Zhan continued laying a wet trail all over Yibo’s body that was now shuddering and shivering. Yibo’s sense of touch was heightened thanks to the blindfold and he bit his lips until he bled in an attempt to control his groans. He squirmed and shifted but Zhan pinned his body down firmly as he made his way to Yibo’s erection.

Yibo heard a bottle opening and then a wet finger teased his opening. Simultaneously, in one swift motion, Zhan took Yibo fully in his mouth, all the way in until it hit the back of his throat. Yibo gasped but immediately bit his lip again to silence himself. Zhan sucked on him mercilessly while fingering him, but then stopped all of a sudden. He could see the dissatisfaction and desperation on Yibo’s face and smirked.

But the moment he inserted his fingers completely in Yibo, the expression changed into one of pure erotic bliss. Zhan inserted another finger to scissor him open and pushed in deeper each time until he found Yibo’s prostate. He felt Yibo’s body lurch but the boy kept his lips sealed.

After a few more seconds, Zhan folded Yibo’s knees up to his chest and leaned on top of him. He reached down and took Yibo’s lips in his roughly, biting down on where Yibo had cut himself. It was as if he was challenging Yibo to moan. But Yibo was stubborn if nothing else and kept his mouth shut although his breathing gave him away.

Zhan guided himself in and began kissing Yibo softly, lapping his tongue on the cut, caressing it, playing with Yibo’s tongue, tasting him until he was all the way in. When he bottomed out, he sat up and held on to Yibo’s knees, spreading them wide. He moved them to an angle that gave him more access to Yibo and began thrusting in hard. 

Yibo’s mind shut down. All he could feel was the throbbing in his body as the only thing he felt, the only thing he was surrounded by, the only thing he could smell, the only thing he could sense was Zhan. He was drowning in pleasure. He was lost in the sensation of Zhan in him, raw and hard. 

He turned his face to one side trying to bury it in his pillow so he could moan but his struggles were all in vain. He bit his pillow to stop himself from grunting loudly. He clutched his bedsheet as Zhan began ramming into him mercilessly. He could hear Zhan’s heavy breathing as he groped him tighter. He wanted Zhan’s lips on him but all he could feel was Zhan’s hands on his erection.

Zhan stroked him faster with each thrust and whispered his name so seductively that Yibo wanted to scream and ask him to fuck him harder. Zhan took one look at Yibo’s face and understood. He let go of Yibo’s erection and topped him at another angle. He bent Yibo’s leg further back until his knees were touching his shoulders.

Zhan pounded into him three more times and then with a low, deep guttural groan, climaxed. He pulled out and dragged his penis over Yibo’s entire torso, leaking all over him. He went all the way up to his mouth. Yibo opened it eagerly and licked at whatever contact he could find. He laid his tongue out and Zhan placed his still erupting dick on it and Yibo lapped up every last bit of Zhan.

With a long satiated sigh, Zhan caught hold of Yibo’s dick that was still painfully hard. He kissed the head and took him in his mouth again, sucking on it, licking the head with a pop each time. The sound and sensations were too much for Yibo. Within a few seconds, he came hard, unable to suppress his groan.

Zhan rushed back up and slapped his lips onto Yibo’s mouth, absorbing the moans and wet breaths. Yibo grabbed Zhan’s hair and pulled him closer, devouring him as he kept on coming. After several more seconds, Zhan pulled back from the kiss and rested his forehead against Yibo’s, panting. He rubbed their noses together and smiled. Slowly, he tugged the cloth off and Yibo blinked his eyes open. Zhan reached out and turned the lamp on. 

”Hey,” Zhan smiled and kissed Yibo’s nose.

”Hey…,” Yibo let out a long exhale and smiled.

”How was that? Were you scared of the darkness?”

”At first, I was nervous...but then...the things you said and did...wow...fuck, Zhan-ge...everything felt better than usual…”

”Good...it was crazy for me too...," Zhan grinned. "Alright, let’s clean up and I’ll leave and…”

”Noooo,” Yibo interrupted. “Stay for some more time…”

”Yibo! If I doze off here...imagine what would happen tomorrow morning.”

”Yeah,” Yibo pouted, “maybe you’re right.”

"Let's shower together, hmm?" Zhan squished Yibo's cheeks.

"Ge!" Yibo giggled softly.

”Come on, puppy,” Zhan grinned and helped him up. 


	96. No more empty apartment

* * *

The next morning, when they arrived for breakfast, hand in hand, both boys were fresh and beaming. Yibo’s mom smiled at them but paused and narrowed her eyes on Yibo.

”Bo-bo,” she tilted her head and Yibo saw a smirk on her face. “What happened to your lips?”

With a sharp inhale, Zhan let go of Yibo’s hand and looked away and Yibo’s eyes widened in embarrassment.

”It’s a good thing your father had to leave early for work,” she raised an eyebrow and continued in a teasing voice.

”I...I...it’s not like that...my lips are cracking because of the change in weather...that’s all!”

”Sure...let’s go with that. Alright now, come on...have some breakfast both of you,” she eyed Zhan who refused to look her way.

”So...have you told your parents, Zhan-Zhan?” She asked finally when neither boy conversed.

”I...yeah we…,” Zhan stuttered, still embarrassed.

”We were in Chongqing before we came here actually...to tell them.”

”Good…,” she nodded in approval. “What did they say?”

Zhan looked down and sat in silence.

”His mom warmed up to me right away and his dad,” Yibo looked at Zhan and held his hand comfortingly, “was fine too but needs some more time...but he will come around. They’re very nice people...they love him very much.”

”Hmm,” she observed Zhan and the way Yibo looked at him affectionately and directed the words more to him than her. “It’s a good thing that you were honest, Zhan-Zhan...and that you were with him, Yibo.”

Yibo looked at her and smiled. His mother returned the smile with an air kiss and gave them a second serving before either of them could protest.

”You must eat more, you’re so thin Zhan-Zhan! You too, baby!”

”Why are all mothers the same?! Do they teach you this at some secret mom school?” Yibo whined but ate his breakfast hungrily.

”Yes...we have a secret school...and we are also taught all the ways in which we can embarrass our children in front of their boyfriends!”

She proceeded to tell Zhan all kinds of stories from Yibo’s childhood before he left for Korea. She showed him photos of a very naked Yibo as a baby and even teased Zhan about it, causing him to turn red.

As the day progressed, Zhan grew more comfortable in Yibo’s home. They had a late night flight which they got ready for reluctantly. Going back home, meeting their families, coming out, had all been so heartwarming at the end of it all. They returned to Beijing feeling a little lighter, freer, and happier. This time, even though they couldn't be themselves at the airport and at baggage claim and as they parted for their cars, their heart didn't feel as heavy as it did the last time.

* * *

> _Yibo: I just reached, ge. You?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Me too, did. Just got home.  
>    
>  Yibo: So...when can I move in? _😏 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: So impatient, Bo-di!  
>    
>  Yibo: Don’t you want me to move in asap? _😢 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Of course, I do sweetie. But I have my Jade Dynasty schedule coming up for the next three weeks.  
>    
>  Yibo: I can move in on my own!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Actually, that’s not such a bad idea! I can make room for you before leaving.  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: And what are you doing with your current apartment?  
>    
>  Yibo: I’ll be keeping it...you know...for appearances.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yeah, that makes sense.  
>    
>  Yibo: Yeah...I wish I didn't have to though…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It’s okay, Yibo. Look how far we’ve come.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Alright, I need to sleep. Talk to you tomorrow?  
>    
>  Yibo: Okay...I miss you...love you, Zhan-ge  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Love you too, Bo-di _❤️ 

Zhan showered and tucked himself in with a satisfied sigh. 

_In a few weeks, I’ll come home to Yibo. No more empty apartment. This will be a loving, warm, comforting home._

Forty five minutes away, a very sleepy yet happy Yibo cuddled his pillow and smiled.

_Soon, I’ll be able to see Zhan-ge’s beautiful face every night before sleeping and every morning when I wake up. I’m so thankful….so so thankful._

* * *

For the next three weeks, Zhan and Yibo communicated only as much as the connection in the forests allowed. Zhan was on location for Jade Dynasty and this time, Yibo had made it clear that if he returned with a single bruise, he would not move in. Although Zhan had chuckled at the threat then, he knew how much it worried Yibo.

> _Yibo: How’s it going, ge?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Hi! Finally have one day off. Some of us are going out for dinner and drinks tonight.  
>    
>  Yibo: I miss you, ge  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Trust me, Bo-di...if I had my way...I’d be flying to you for one night instead of being here  
>    
>  Yibo: Really?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Of course, puppy. What’s going on? You seem low.  
>    
>  Yibo: I just...I’m tired...I’ve been at the track all week but I feel like I’m not getting any better…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: What makes you think that? Did the team coach say something?  
>    
>  Yibo: No, he’s saying I’m making progress...but it’s not as fast as I want it to be…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: But isn’t the race is in four months?  
>    
>  Yibo: Yeah, but between all my work commitments, I won't get as much time on the tracks as the others  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I don't know much about racing, didi...but what I do know is that if anyone can do this...it’s you  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It won't be easy...but that’s when you thrive the most...when things are hard...you fight back harder.  
>    
>  Yibo: Thank you, ge...I can do this...I’m going to fucking do this! _

Yibo wiped the tear that had shown up in the corner of his eyes.

_Another week and Zhan-ge will be back. I’m almost done moving too._ Yibo smiled to himself. 

* * *

> _Zhan: Hey, sweetie  
>    
>  Bo-di: Ge! Guess what?  
>    
>  Zhan: What? Are you okay?  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m done moving my things...I’m officially living at your place!  
>    
>  Zhan: Bo-di...that makes me so happy...you made my day!  
>    
>  Bo-di: 😘 😘😘  
>    
>  Bo-di: How’s the shoot going?  
>    
>  Zhan: It’s fine...today is the dreaded kissing scene...but it should be fine  
>    
>  Bo-di: What?  
>    
>  Zhan: What?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Kissing scene?  
>    
>  Zhan: Didn't I tell you?  
>    
>  Bo-di: No.  
>    
>  Zhan: Bo-di...don't get angry...it’s not even a real kiss scene...it’s supposed to be a funny kiss...nothing romantic  
>    
>  Bo-di: With which one of the THREE girls you’re paired with?  
>    
>  Zhan: Bo-di! Don't be mean. And with Meng Meiqi. You know her. You’ve been friends since your trainee days, right?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Hmm...yeah.  
>    
>  Zhan: Come on, Yibo. This is our job. You’ve kissed in almost every show you’ve been on! Including Gank!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Hmm…not on all...  
>    
>  Zhan: Oh really!? Which one have you not kissed on?  
>    
>  Bo-di: I never got to kiss you on screen 😏  
>    
>  Zhan: Bo-di! 🙈  
>    
>  Bo-di: Sorry, ge...I just don't like the idea of someone else’s lips on yours.  
>    
>  Zhan: If it makes you feel any better, I don't either…  
>    
>  Bo-di: 😘 😘 😘  
>    
>  Zhan: I miss your lips…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Yeah?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Few more days, ge...few more days! _


	97. Did you forget?

* * *

Zhan yawned as he made his way upstairs in the elevator.

_It’s already April. April. Wow._

When the elevator opened, Zhan trudged out and walked to his apartment. He fumbled with the keys as his eyes drooped shut. Zhan could feel himself begin to nod off when the door flung open.

"Zhan-ge!”

Zhan startled awake and with widening eyes saw a radiant Yibo standing at the door, greeting him, taking his bag from him, and leading him inside. Yibo placed the bag by the couch and turned to look at Zhan but noticed that Zhan was blinking, lost and confused.

”Ge?” Yibo shook him by the arm.

”Bo-di?” Zhan finally spoke. 

”Are you awake, ge?” Yibo chuckled and waved a hand in front of Zhan’s eyes.

”I..I...what are _you_ doing here? Oh no, was today date night and I forgot?!”

”Ge?!” Yibo looked at him in disbelief. “Did you forget I live here now?!”

Zhan blinked a few more times and finally looked around his apartment and sure enough there were things that didn't belong to him. There were some lego cars on display in the bookshelf. There were some helmets placed carefully and thoughtfully throughout the living room. There were snacks that Zhan didn't normally have scattered on the dining table.

”Oh fuck,” Zhan spoke after several seconds of silence. “Oh fuck.”

”Yep,” Yibo popped his lips with a grin.

”I’m so sorry, sweetie!” Zhan walked to Yibo and held his hands. “My brain has just melted after these three long weeks.”

”It’s okay, gege,” Yibo shook his head, smiling, and kissed Zhan’s hand. “Come see the bedroom! And then you need to freshen up, eat, and sleep.”

Zhan followed Yibo into the room and his eyes opened wide again when he saw how lived in the room looked. He finally remembered that Yibo had mentioned a week ago that he had moved all his things into Zhan’s apartment. His belongings now occupied half the room. When Zhan walked into the bathroom, he saw half the counter and cabinet filled with products that weren’t his.

”We’re finally living together, ge,” Yibo came up behind Zhan and wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist, placing a kiss on his shoulder.

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded.

”Ge?” Yibo turned Zhan around and was surprised when he saw tears. “What is it, ge? Do you not like how everything looks? I knew I should have waited for you to unpack. We can arrange it however you want, ge. Sorry! I know it’s probably too many toys and helmets.”

Zhan put a hand behind Yibo’s head and pulled him in, sealing their lips together. He deepened the kiss immediately as if parched for Yibo. He tugged at Yibo’s hair as he maneuvered his tongue around every inch of Yibo’s mouth.

”Shut up,” Zhan whispered when he broke the kiss. “I love it. All of it. Those are your things but this is now _our_ apartment. These are tears of happiness.”

Yibo grinned and they kissed for a few more minutes before walking back outside, hand in hand.

* * *

After Zhan had freshened up, he came out to the dining room wiping his hair dry. To his surprise, his clothes were already running in the laundry, dinner was already served on the table, and a smiling Yibo was laying the plates out.

Zhan stood stuck to the spot as he gazed at the scenery that occupied his living room. His heart warmed at the sight. He walked up to Yibo and placed the towel on the chair. He hugged him from behind as Yibo placed the spoons beside the plates. 

”Hey…,’ Zhan placed kisses along Yibo’s neck.

”Hi…,” Yibo squirmed with a smile as Zhan’s lips tickled his skin.

”This feels so good…”

”Mmm,” Yibo nodded as he poured the tea.

”Did you cook?”

”No, I ordered,” Yibo grinned sheepishly.

”Good,” Zhan bared his teeth and bit Yibo’s neck playfully.

”Someone seems to have recovered from their exhaustion.”

”The shower helped…”

”That’s the only reason? Yibo pouted.

”And something else helped too,” Zhan squeezed his arms around Yibo.

”What?”

”You,” Zhan whispered lovingly and nuzzled his face in the curve of Yibo’s neck.

Yibo smiled shyly and ruffled his hand through Zhan’s damp hair. Zhan closed his eyes and rested his forehead on Yibo’s shoulder, enjoying the gentle massage.

”Looks like you haven't fully recovered,” Yibo chuckled and turned around. “Don't sleep just yet, Zhan-ge. You need to eat,” Yibo placed a kiss on Zhan’s nose.

”Hmm…,” Zhan hugged Yibo and let out a long exhale.

When he pulled back, Zhan enveloped Yibo’s lips in his and kissed him lazily, refusing to let go.

”Come on, sit here,” Yibo guided a very sleepy Zhan backwards to the chair and seated him.

Zhan still refused to break the kiss and Yibo stood there, leaning forward, kissing Zhan deeper with every moan. Eventually, Zhan let him pull away and he sat on the chair opposite his and served them some noodles and chicken.

”I ordered it from your favorite place.”

”Wow...I already love my new roommate!” Zhan’s eyes crinkled into half moons as he beamed after taking one bite.

Yibo looked at him affectionately but with some concern.

_His eyes are so swollen. It’s like he hasn't slept in days. And he looks so weak._

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo began eating, “what’s your schedule tomorrow?”

”Thankfully, nothing. You?”

”Just some rehearsals and ad shoots. And we have the song recordings in a few days, right?”

”Oh yeah, Wuji and our solos!”

”Yep...but it’s good that you have a day off...you can get some rest tomorrow. You look like you need it, ge.”

”Are you saying I look horrible right now?” Zhan pouted.

”No way,” Yibo leaned forward and took Zhan’s hand in his, “my boyfriend can never look horrible.”

Yibo kissed the back of Zhan’s hand and Zhan smiled once again.

”You become such a baby when you’re tired,” Yibo chuckled.

”You’re one to talk,” Zhan poked his tongue out, feigning a frown. “But then again,” he smirked, “you’re always a baby.”

”Shut up,” Yibo kicked Zhan’s foot even as he kept grinning. 

”You shut up,” Zhan giggled.

”You shut up…”

”No, you shut up…”

”Zhan-ge…”

”Bo-di…”

”Zhan-ge…”

”Bo-di…”

Their voices and faces softened with every response as they gazed at each other fondly and continued to eat in silence after a few more _’Zhan-ge’s_ and _Bo-di’s_. 

When dinner was done, Yibo scolded Zhan until he went to the bedroom, insisting that he would clean up alone. He shook his head in amusement as a pouty Zhan dragged his feet towards the bedroom. When Yibo entered the room fifteen minutes later, Zhan was sprawled across the bed on his stomach, sound asleep.

Yibo leaned against the doorway and stood there watching the innocent face that breathed steadily and still held a hint of the pout.

_We made it._ Yibo thought with a satisfied sigh. _I get to see this side of Xiao Zhan. I get to be the person he comes home to. I get to be the one to take care of him. I get to be the one to love him, fight with him, spoil him, cuddle him, and spend the rest of my life with him._

Yibo slid into the tiny space that was available beside the starfish-ed Zhan as carefully as he could. Zhan must have not been in deep sleep because on sensing Yibo on the bed, he whined and adjusted his body, draping it over Yibo’s. Trapped under a clingy Zhan, Yibo smiled and wrapped his free arm around Zhan and pulled him even closer.

”Goodnight, Zhan-ge…”

”I love you, Bo-di.”

”I love you more…”

”Not possible…”


	98. What are you thinking?

* * *

Zhan woke up to a warmth draped over him. He turned his face and smiled when he saw Yibo asleep with his face squished against Zhan’s chest. 

_God I love him so much._ Zhan thought. _How did my life get to this point?! How did any of this happen? I still can't believe it. Yibo is my boyfriend, he lives with me now, he loves me._

Zhan felt Yibo stir and pulled him closer.

”Gege?” Yibo opened his eyes slowly and mumbled. 

”Mmm, I’m right here,” Zhan replied gently.

”Did you sleep well?”

”Yeah...you?”

”The best sleep I’ve ever had…,” Yibo smiled softly. “Our first night together in our home…,” Yibo cuddled against Zhan’s chest.

”Our home,” Zhan whispered with a far off look.

”What are you thinking, ge?”

”Our future,” Zhan replied before he realized what he was saying.

”Oh?” Yibo felt his heart skip a beat. “What...what about our future?”

”Uhh...I,” Zhan blushed as his mind went back to the beach on which he had asked Yibo to move in with him and the words that they had spoken, the promise they had made, and the unspoken words that had lingered in the air between them.

Yibo propped himself up on his elbow and faced Zhan. His mind went back to the beach in Greece on Valentine’s day where they had exchanged a promise. The words had been left unspoken even as their eyes had understood. But Yibo longed to hear them. To be sure that Zhan really was on the same page as him.

”I…,” Zhan blushed harder but one look at Yibo’s hopeful face melted all his hesitation. “I was thinking about how we will be together forever. No matter what.”

Yibo gave him a small smile and bit his lips.

”I was thinking about how one day we could gather all our loved ones and declare our commitment to each other and receive their blessings.”

Yibo’s breath hitched and his heart began racing.

”I was thinking about how nice it would be to get a pet together,” Zhan’s voice softened, “and how nice it would be to...have a family of our own.”

Yibo’s entire body trembled as he felt his heart thump in every corner of it.

” _That’s_ what I was thinking.” Zhan spoke gently but firmly.

For several heartbeats, all they did was stare into each other’s eyes. Zhan’s face held a determined resolute expression Yibo had never seen before. There was no smile, no shyness, no insecurity. Just a sureness that Yibo found more comforting than any expression he had ever seen on Zhan’s face before.

”Wang Yibo?” Zhan grazed Yibo’s cheek with his fingers. 

”Mmm,” Yibo couldn't form words with his quivering lips.

”What do you think?”

”I…,” Yibo’s mind tried to form coherent thoughts, “I…”

”It’s okay if you’re not ready to talk ab…”

”I love it,” Yibo blurted. “I’m...this was exactly what I was trying to say that night on the beach.”

”But...you’re only 21…what if you change your mind...how can you be sure?”

The look of certainty had left Zhan’s face but this time, Yibo’s expression was firm and resolute.

”Xiao Zhan,” Yibo placed a hand on his cheek, “I’m a simple guy. I know what I like and what I want...and I go after that. Nothing else distracts me. What I like at 21, I will like at 81. I am sure of it.”

”But…,” Zhan looked at him with a slight frown.

”But what sweetheart?”

”But what will happen once you’re 81?” Zhan smirked.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo exclaimed and pushed Zhan away.

Zhan laughed and rolled them over until he was on top of Yibo. He planted kisses all over his face as Yibo giggled and squirmed beneath him. Eventually, Yibo caught hold of Zhan’s hands and spread his arms wide, causing Zhan to fall forward until they were almost nose to nose.

Breathless from the laughter, Yibo gazed into Zhan’s half moon eyes with a grin. Zhan leaned forward and planted a kiss by the corner of Yibo’s mouth, then along his lower lip, then on the plush plump lips.

Zhan pulled Yibo’s shirt off over his head and with a mischievous glint in his eyes, kissed all of Yibo’s tickle spots. Yibo’s giggles grew louder and more uncontrollable as Zhan nipped at all his sensitive areas. Zhan knew the one spot on his neck that sent Yibo into a fit, he knew the stretch along his waist that sent Yibo spiralling, he knew that raspberry kisses to his belly button made Yibo break into peals of laughter, the kind that Zhan loved to hear.

”Zhan-ge! Stop!” Yibo squealed.

”Never…!” Zhan laughed along.

”Gege!!” Yibo giggled as Zhan turned his attention to the tickle spot behind his knee.

Zhan laughed happily as he kept nibbling and kissing Yibo until he was begging for mercy breathlessly. Only then did Zhan sit up and give him a moment’s relief. Zhan leaned over Yibo and caressed his sweaty face.

”Ge,” Yibo laughed softly and finally caught his breath. “You almost killed me.”

”That was nothing,” Zhan kissed his lips and smirked at Yibo. “Wait till what I do to you next!”

”Ge!” Yibo squealed again as Zhan launched into another tickle attack. 

They rolled and frolicked around the bed until Yibo could take no more. This time, when Zhan stopped, his eyes darkened as he saw a breathless sweaty Yibo under him. This time when Zhan sat up, his own breathing grew heavy as he saw Yibo’s flushed face, this time when Zhan’s fingers trailed over Yibo, his felt goosebumps travel up his own arm. 

”You look so beautiful like this,” Zhan spoke in a low deep voice.

Yibo felt his breath hitch as Zhan eyed him like he was a delicious dish. The next moment, he moaned as Zhan rolled his hips against Yibo, pressing his own erection into Yibo’s. Zhan kneaded into Yibo until he was moaning and pleading for more.

”Ge…,” Yibo bit his lip.

Zhan leaned forward and with another smirk and bit Yibo’s waist prompting a breathy giggle.

”Ge!” Yibo twitched, trying to get away. “Stop!”

”What do you want me to stop?” Zhan kept grinding on Yibo.

”No...not that...don't stop that!”

Zhan rolled away and pulled Yibo’s pants off in one swift motion. He got back on top and grinned as he bent down to give Yibo another raspberry kiss.

”Whatever you say, didi,” Zhan chuckled. “Whatever you say.”


	99. You better be careful with your face

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there was discussion of time zones in the comments and now I'm curious to know where everyone is from! Please do let me know through the comments! I'm based in the US!

* * *

> _Zhan: Just reached the studio...where are you?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Stuck in traffic...I can't believe I’m going to be late for my recording with the one and only Lin Hai!!_ 😖 😓 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Way to make a first impression! I’m already nervous about recording with him and you  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m a rapper, ge….and this is a legit song...a ballad...and it’s Lin fucking Hai!!  
>    
>  Zhan: Bo-di! Breathe...breathe…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Yeah...yeah...you’re right. I need to calm down. I’ll be there in fifteen more minutes.  
>    
>  Zhan: Don't worry, the previous recording is still going on  
>    
>  Zhan: You’ll never guess who it is!_ 😮 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Who??  
>    
>  Zhan: Ayunga! He’s recording the theme song for Nie Mingjue & Nie Huaisang!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: What?! That’s crazy! _😮 😮 😮 _  
>   
>  Zhan: You know what’s crazier? Zheng Yunlong is here...just to accompany him…!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Woah! _🤯 _  
>   
>  Zhan: And I see what you meant by chemistry...even though Ayunga is recording and he is sitting in the studio, they keep glancing at each other and smiling...and Yunlong is gazing at him so fondly  
>    
>  Bo-di: Wow...could they be more obvious...it’s cute, isn't it?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah, kinda is. They’re very sweet people too. They’ve been friends since college. And they’ve worked together a lot.  
>    
>  Bo-di: I hope we get to work together a lot too, ge  
>    
>  Zhan: Me too, didi _😘 😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: It would be my honor to work with the amazing Xiao Zhan! Multitalented! Handsome!  
>    
>  Zhan: The honor would be all mine...talk about multi talented...you’re an anchor, rapper, singer, dancer, actor, skater, professional biker….my my...I’m so lucky!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Okay! Okay! I get it...let’s not start!  
>    
>  Bo-di: And I’m almost there…  
>    
>  Bo-di: This is the first time we’re meeting in public professionally since we began dating, ge _😏 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Bo-di...you better behave!  
>    
>  Bo-di: I don't know what you mean, ge...I always behave! _😏 😏 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Bo-di….  
>    
>  Bo-di: Zhan-ge...  
>    
>  Zhan: _😰 🤦 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: See you in a minute, ge _😘 

__

Zhan stared at his phone affectionately as he shook his head. As promised, the next moment, the door to the studio opened and in walked Yibo with a nervous smile plastered on his face.

__

_God, he looks so handsome in that white hoodie. I just want to hug him and kiss him. This is going to be so strange...behaving like we’re just friends._ Zhan bit his lip even as he smiled widely.

__

”You better be careful with your face if you want to be discreet,” a voice snapped him out of his thoughts.

__

Zhan startled and turned to see Yunlong leaning towards him as he whispered. Zhan grew flustered at the words and eyed the smiling man, uncertain and worried.

__

”Wha...what?”

__

”It’s okay,” Yunlong smiled. “I can tell...but you should be careful,” he nodded in the direction of Yibo. “Your face is giving it away.”

__

”So is yours,” Zhan relaxed and nodded in Ayunga’s direction with a smirk. 

__

”Really?” Yunlong’s eyes widened. “Fuck! I thought I was getting better at it,” he shook his head and chuckled.

__

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo eyed the two men who were whispering and barged into their conversation. “I’m here!” He announced.

__

_He is such a puppy. Always seeking attention._ Zhan chuckled to himself and stood up.

__

”Bo-di,” he stretched his hand out and clasped Yibo’s as they bumped shoulders.

__

Just before pulling apart, Zhan caught a glint in Yibo’s eyes and he could see the mischief brewing. He gave him a warning look and pulled back immediately, feeling his face heat up.

__

”Hello,” Yibo bowed to Zheng Yunlong who bowed back.

__

”Nice to see you again, Wang Yibo,” Yunlong smiled.

__

At that moment, Ayunga stepped out of the recording room and joined them. He gave a nod to Yunlong who was watching him walk over and then bowed to both Zhan and Yibo.

__

”Ah...Wang Yibo! Good to see you again. Hello, Xiao Zhan.”

__

”Hello, hello...you did such a great job in there...your voice...it’s so powerful!” Zhan gushed.

__

Lin Hai and the rest of the team were busy setting up for their recording and the four chatted softly so as to not disturb them.

__

”Ah you’re both here,” Lin Hai smiled warmly when he noticed the group. “We’ll take some more time to set up. Have some tea in the next room if you want to.”

__

The boys nodded and bowed to him before heading out.

__

”It was such an honor working with Lin Hai. Have you worked with him before?” Ayunga addressed Yibo and Zhan.

__

”It’s our first time as well,” Yibo replied.

__

”Do you want some tea?” Both Yunlong and Zhan asked Ayunga and Yibo simultaneously.

__

Everybody paused and looked at each other in turns. Ayunga broke the silence with his chuckle followed by Yibo and then Zhan and Yunlong.

__

”Yes,” Yibo nodded and smiled at Zhan who nodded back and began pouring them tea.

__

He was joined by Yunlong as Ayunga and Yibo chatted in the back. 

__

”So I take it, it’s been a while for you both too?” Yunlong whispered.

__

”Not...not that long,” Zhan replied nervously.

__

”It’s okay...I won't tell anyone...your secret is safe as is ours with you,” Yunlong smiled kindly.

__

”It’s been...six months...wow,” Zhan gasped as he realized how long it actually had been. “I didn't realize until now...it’s been a while I guess.”

__

”Long way to go, Xiao Zhan,” Yunlong chuckled. “Wait till that turns into years!”

__

Zhan blushed and nodded.

__

Before anything more could be said, a staff member poked his head in and announced that they were ready for Zhan and Yibo.

__

”Good luck,” Ayunga smiled and patted Yibo’s arm.

__

__

”Yeah,” Yunlong smirked at Zhan, “good luck you two. In everything you do.”

__

As Zhan and Yibo stepped out of the room, Yibo leaned in slightly and whispered to Zhan.

__

”He knows doesn’t he?”

__

”Yep,” Zhan popped his lips.

__

* * *

__

As they began recording, Lin Hai directed them through every line. He conjured up images in their head to help them reconnect with their emotions as the characters. If only he knew, they didn't need any reminding. Those memories were safe and fresh in their hearts and minds.

__

They stood in the recording room side by side as they began singing their solo lines one at a time.

__

”Don't worry, boys...this is just to warm up. You’re doing great!” Lin Hai smiled at them from the other side of the glass.

__

”How’re you doing, didi,” Zhan stepped away from the mic and whispered to Yibo.

__

”Okay...feeling a little better now...how am I doing? Am I okay?”

__

”You’re doing great...your voice is so perfect for this song...it’s soft and in control. Just keep focusing on your breath and be sure to sing from here,” Zhan placed his hand on his own diaphragm. “This will help you project and steady your voice.”

__

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and took a few deep breaths.

__

They continued recording the lines and receiving feedback from Lin Hai until he was satisfied.

__

”Okay, let’s go from the top…,” he nodded, smiling wider.

__

As Zhan began singing, Yibo lost himself in his soothing, deep, honey voice. It eased him into his own line that came next. Hearing the words coming out of their mouths made it easy for them to turn into Wei Ying and Lan Zhan once again. 

__

Zhan felt a fondness spread through his body as he reminisced his way back to the summer of the previous year. He caught Yibo stealing a glance at him when he sang his next lines.

__

_The story is not over  
Our connection and time together remains pure._

__

Zhan smiled softly as he launched into the chorus. He watched Yibo intently as he followed Zhan with his lines.

__

_So why not just face all the hardships with an unrestrained heart  
While sharing a song melody wherever we are._

__

Yibo saw a wide smile light up Zhan’s face as he glanced at him barely managing to suppress his affection and joy.

__

_The story is not over  
We laugh about how unpredictable life is._

__

He felt his entire being light up when their voices joined together in perfect harmony and ended the song on the sweetest note Lin Hai could have found.

__

_So why not just face all the hardships with a magnanimous heart  
While sharing a song melody wherever we are._

__

Zhan and Yibo looked at each other as the song faded out, their hearts fluttering as they made eye contact.

__

_While sharing a song melody wherever we are._

__

”Wonderful! That take was perfect!!” Lin Hai’s overjoyed voice startled them out of their moment of bliss.

__

”We can do a few more takes but I am happy with this one. Good job, Zhan! I’m so proud of you, Yibo!”

__

Zhan and Yibo glanced at each other one last time before putting the headphones down.

_I wish I could hug him right now._ Zhan thought. _I need a hug...I need to feel his warmth._

_I want to hold him so bad._ Yibo gazed at Zhan's lost face at the end of the song. _He looks like he needs to be held._

”Good job, Bo-di,” Zhan spoke as he held the door open for Yibo to step out first.

”You too, ge,” Yibo reduced his voice to a whisper as he brushed past Zhan. “I love you.”

__

Yibo grinned as he walked past, leaving a blushing Zhan standing at the door trying to pull himself together before making his way back to the team.

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wuji translation -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLB-mL5I0E4
> 
> Also, like I have mentioned before, I really like Ayunga too and stan him and Yunlong. So they will keep making appearances and play an especially important role a little later down the road when another character will return too. 😏


	100. Is our reunion a dream or real?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I've reached the 100 chapter mark!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> With this, we complete one year of Yizhan's journey! And one and half months of my journey of writing this story!
> 
> A huge THANK YOU to all you readers, kudo-ers, and especially the comment-ers! I really truly couldn't have gotten this far without you. Can't wait to move forward in this journey and bring you more love, fluff, smut, angst and all that good stuff.

* * *

After having a short discussion with Lin Hai about their solo songs, Zhan and Yibo took turns in recording their songs. Yibo watched in awe as Zhan breezed through his song even nailing the traditional opera style. 

He felt a protective emotion overcome him when Zhan sang the defiant words of Wei Ying knowing how much they resonated with Zhan.

_I brushed off the criticism and ridicule  
I have nothing, but courage anyway, so why would I fear the words of others  
Entering the sea of fire but still retain sympathy._

His heart stopped when Zhan looked at him and flashed him his radiant smile as he sang about Lan Zhan.

_I have also tried to take away a jar of liquor with a smile  
And had a sword battle with the most beautiful person of Gusu once._

His eyes burned when he was reminded of the day they filmed Wei Ying’s death scene as Zhan poured his heart into the words.

_Died at the nightless city  
Who would believe that the young man told no lie?_

He could feel a blush creeping on his face when Zhan flirted with the words that hinted towards Wei Ying’s feelings for Lan Zhan.

_I was also once stunned by someone  
And teased the cloud pattern with my fingertips  
The sudden vibration of the zither  
I wonder why I remember that moment deep down in my dream. _

When Zhan went on to sing the next verse, Yibo felt something deep inside him stir as he noticed the way Zhan looked at him. It was as if Zhan was singing to him and not to Lan Zhan. 

__

_I also had someone in the mortal world once to love and long for…  
….The voice outside the door is soft but so real...  
….Is our reunion a dream or real?_

__

When the music faded, Yibo thought he saw Zhan take a deep breath and discreetly wipe the corner of his eyes. All Yibo wanted at that moment was to rush to Zhan’s side and embrace him and comfort him.

__

”That was beautiful, Zhan-Zhan,” Lin Hai spoke softly when Zhan came out of the recording room.

__

Zhan bowed and glanced at Yibo who nodded at him, smiling.

__

”Come, Yibo,” Lin Hai patted the boy’s back. “Your turn. Let’s take this nice and slow.”

__

Yibo nodded nervously and stepped into the room. He put on the headphones and looked at Zhan who gave him a warm smile and a thumbs up before placing his hand on his stomach and reminding Yibo to breathe.

__

Zhan felt the melancholy melody hit him immediately. He watched Yibo transform almost instantly into Lan Zhan and felt a rush of affection and awe spread through him. His heart ached as Yibo made his way through the loneliness felt by Lan Zhan, alone in the room. 

__

_Sound of Zither echoes in Jingshi  
Playing a song of inquiry but answered by no soul._

__

Zhan wanted to hug him as Yibo’s face turned sad as did his own as he was reminded how they had felt isolated and desperate unaware of their feelings for each other, fighting to hold back and retain their sanity.

__

Zhan felt his heart flutter when Yibo sang the words that reminded him of the beach in Greece where his entire life had changed its course and the morning after their first night together in what was now their home.

__

_How can it be forgotten?  
The promise we made in the deepest clouds that will follow you till the end._

__

Zhan’s mind turned bitter on hearing Yibo’s next words that made him remember how unfair their society was and how people would look down on them if they ever discovered their love.

__

_Bichen lives up to its name  
Yet it is hard to avoid the madness of love, hate, right and wrongs of this world._

__

It took everything Zhan had to keep himself rooted to his spot when Yibo looked straight at him and sung the end of the song in the most beautiful, heartbreaking way. His voice struck a chord within Zhan as the melody of the zither and flute came together finally and Lan Zhan’s words were uplifted.

__

_How can it be forgotten?  
Seeing how gatherings separate, yet only you, I do not forget  
You are right next to me  
I hope you've been well since we last met._

__

Zhan watched as Yibo closed his eyes at the end of the song with a sad smile and then opened it to look at Zhan once again. Zhan felt his own eyes tear up again as he watched Yibo bite his lips before stepping out of the room.

__

Zhan looked at Yibo who looked drained as he stood beside him, his eyes fixed on Lin Hai anxiously.

__

”Good job, dear,” Lin Hai walked to Yibo and patted both his shoulders proudly.

__

”Thank you, laoshi,” Yibo sighed in relief and bowed.

__

”That was beautiful, Bo-di,” Zhan squeezed Yibo’s arm and smiled, nudging his side affectionately.

__

Yibo grinned and nudged him back.

__

”Not more beautiful than Zhan-ge’s singing…”

__

”Bo-di! Are we starting this again?!” Zhan threw him a warning look.

__

”Alright, you two,” Lin Hai chuckled. “Zheng-laoshi warned me that you may bicker like love birds!”

__

Both Yibo and Zhan’s eyes widened and they looked down, embarrassed and blushing.

__

”But good job, I’m proud of you two. Come let’s get a photo together to remember this wonderful day!”

__

* * *

__

Zhan waited at home for Yibo to return. He had rehearsals for a show after the song recordings. All Zhan wanted after the recording was to have Yibo in his arms. He was in awe as to how Yibo was able to slide right into the next work commitment even though he knew he felt the same.

__

> __
> 
> _Bo-di: Ge...I’m coming home  
>    
>  Zhan: I’m here...waiting _😊 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: _😊 😊 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Can't wait to get home...need a hug so bad  
>    
>  Zhan: Me too, didi  
>    
>  Bo-di: That was a heavy session, huh  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah, but you did so well  
>    
>  Bo-di: Really?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yes...you blew everyone away  
>    
>  Bo-di: That’s a relief...I was so nervous  
>    
>  Zhan: Come home...I’ll show you just how good you were_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: _🙈 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Love you, didi  
>    
>  Bo-di: Love you too, ge_
> 
> __

_  
_

* * *

__

Zhan was cooking when he heard the door open. 

__

”In here, Bo-di,” Zhan called out.

__

A few seconds later, he felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around his waist and a light kiss being placed on his shoulder. Zhan turned his face to the side and pulled Yibo closer by his cheek. He planted a soft kiss on his lips. As he pulled back, Yibo didn't let go of the kiss. 

__

He turned Zhan around by the waist and deepened the kiss, pulling him closer. Zhan sighed and let Yibo carry him away with the kiss. He could feel himself floating in the clouds with every soft kiss. When they pulled apart, they embraced each other for several minutes.

__

”Zhan-ge…”

__

”Mmm?”

__

”We met each other at the workshop exactly one year ago.”

__

Zhan pulled back surprised and tilted his head.

__

”Really?!”

__

”Really,” Yibo smiled.

__

”Oh my god, didi! How do you remember these things! I’m the worst boyfriend ever. I didn't remember valentine’s day and I didn't remember today and I’ll probably forget our anniversary!!” Zhan scowled at himself.

__

”You’re the best boyfriend, ge...I just...like remembering these dates...they’re special…”

__

”I know...that’s exactly why I should remember them too!” Zhan frowned and crossed his arms across his chest.

__

”I can remember them for the both of us. You do other things.”

__

”Like what? Forget things?” Zhan pouted.

__

”Like taking such good care of me when I come from long shoots, cooking, reminding me to drink water, bandaging even the smallest of bruises,” Yibo placed kisses all over Zhan’s face. “All these small things are special too.”

__

”Really?” Zhan’s pout reduced slightly.

__

”Really,” Yibo hugged him again and they swayed side to side. ”Happy one year of loving each other.”

__

”You didn't fall in love with me at first sight!”

__

”My heart fluttered at your smile. And even though I didn't realize it then, I was beginning to fall for you right then and there. Maybe you didn't fall in love with me then but I did.”

__

”I...I wasn't completely devoid of feelings either, didi.”

__

”Really?” Yibo pulled back and looked at Zhan in surprise.

__

”Yeah...when I came in late...and looked at you...my heart fluttered too and I couldn't help but think how handsome you were,” Zhan grinned, blushing.

__

”I did notice you had a strange expression when you sat beside me,” Yibo remembered. “I couldn't tell what it was then but guess you were checking me out,” Yibo smirked.

__

”I didn't know what it was then, but I guess you’re right...happy one year of making each other’s heart flutter.”

__

”I can get on board with that….happy one year of making each other’s heart flutter, ge.”

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The english translations of Wei Ying and Lan Zhan's songs - 
> 
> https://jh-nimm.blogspot.com/2019/07/qu-jin-chen-qing-song-ends-with-chen.html
> 
> https://jh-nimm.blogspot.com/2019/07/bu-wang-wont-forget-wang-yibo-untamed.html
> 
> Photo of Yibo and Zhan with Lin Hai -
> 
> https://twitter.com/BigBadRedPanda/status/1161657340229226496


	101. Let's have them over

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone who needs to get situated in the timeline...we are currently in mid April 2019.

* * *

”Bo-di! I got a text from our director, Zheng-laoshi.”

”Me too,” Yibo replied from the living room.

Zhan heard hurried footsteps approach the bedroom where Zhan sat, staring at his phone.

”Did you see it? Did you see the photo?” A beaming Yibo moved the phone aside and sat on top of Zhan’s lap.

”Yes,” a surprised yet smiling Zhan looked at the excited boy.

”That’s us...I can't believe we didn't know about this…”

”How could we, we were fast asleep!”

”On each other, ge! You on my shoulder, me on your head...we look so cute!”

”It’s also embarrassing,” Zhan blushed, “having your director click a secret photo of you cuddling at the back of the bus and then sending you the photo. Especially when he doesn’t even know we’re dating!!” Zhan exclaimed.

”Maybe on some level he knows? He always gazed at us in soft ways and smiled when he saw us interacting, fighting, giggling…,” Yibo shrugged.

”I hope not..,” Zhan gasped.

”It’s fine I think...I mean he _did_ direct a love story between two men and snuck in as much intimacy and romantic hints as he could.”

”Hmmm,” Zhan thought over Yibo’s words and then smiled fondly.

Yibo snuggled against Zhan’s chest and brought the phone up for the both of them to see the rest of the message.

> _Zheng-laoshi: Thought you boys may want to see this photo of you two looking cute?  
>    
>  Zheng-laoshi: Remember the bus ride to the remote location? Snapped you two sleeping...couldn't help it  
>    
>  Zheng-laoshi: Lin Hai sent me some behind the scenes footage from the song recording  
>    
>  Zheng-laoshi: We may use some of it for the MV...it works well with the show footage...especially the way you two keep glancing at each other...always in sync :)  
>    
>  Zheng-laoshi: There was a video of you two giggling at the end of Wuji...what was going on there? Fighting again? Haha!  
>    
>  _

Zhan giggled as he saw the videos from the recording and the director's teasing messages. 

”Are you responding or I?” Zhan questioned.

”I think we both should...it’s not like he knows we’re seeing these together…”

”Good thinking!” Zhan placed a kiss on Yibo’s forehead.

> _Yibo: Thanks for sharing these embarrassing photos, laoshi!_ 😲 _  
>   
>  Yibo: I don't remember what Lin-laoshi was saying...but he made us laugh! _

”You don't remember?” Zhan nudged Yibo.

”I do...but you tell him,” Yibo threw the phone aside and wrapped his arms around Zhan with a grin.

”Brat!” Zhan reached for his phone and began typing.

> _Zhan: Thank you, laoshi! But these are so embarrassing! Are you really going to use these in the MV?!_ 🙈 _  
>   
>  Zhan: And we were laughing because…  
>    
>  Zhan: Lin-laoshi was asking us to look more in love while they were recording us…_😳 _  
>   
>  Zheng-laoshi: That shouldn't have been hard for you ;) _

Zhan froze and showed Yibo the message. 

”Does he know, Bo-di...fuck fuck…”

> _Zhan: Laoshi? I didn't follow...  
>    
>  Zheng-laoshi: I mean...because you’re such good actors of course!  
>    
>  Zheng-laoshi: Why? What did you think? ;) _

Zhan breathed a sigh of relief and bit his lips nervously.

> _Zhan: Oh, haha! Nothing, laoshi...I just...got confused  
>    
>  Zheng-laoshi: Ah...I’ll see you boys in a few weeks for the pre-release celebration party!  
>    
>  Zhan: See you soon, laoshi! _

”That was close,” Zhan exhaled.

”I won't be surprised if he knows,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s chest with a smirk.

”I wish everyone knew...I wish I could walk hand in hand with you everywhere we went...I wish we could go on romantic dates to our favorite restaurants...I wish I could tell everyone that you are my boyfriend and I am yours,” Zhan sighed.

”Maybe one day...maybe only our loved ones...maybe only in some places...but as long as we’re together...none of the other stuff matters.”

”Mmm,” Zhan rocked them gently. “I’m happy with whatever we have...sometimes I can't help but wish though…”

”Me too,” Yibo nodded and played with Zhan’s shirt.

”Do you think...maybe…”

”What?” Yibo tilted his head up to look at Zhan.

”Maybe our families...can meet each other?”

Yibo sat up and looked at Zhan with wide eyes. 

”Yeah?”

”Yeah?” Zhan bit his lips.

”Yeah,” Yibo nodded eagerly.

”Yeah,” Zhan laughed and placed his hands on Yibo’s cheek. Let’s have them over…I have two extra rooms anyway. One’s a guest room and I can convert the study to another one as well.” 

”Won't that be crazy...we have my apartment too, you know…”

”Let’s see how it goes,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s cheek. “I want us to live together like one big happy family,” he blushed.

”Whatever you want, my cute bunny,” Yibo smiled and pulled him close for a kiss.

Zhan smiled against his lips before melting into the kiss, sighing as Yibo deepened it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter, will make up for it in the next one!


	102. Be careful of the promises you make

* * *

Within seconds, the kiss turned passionate and desperate as Yibo sat on Zhan’s lap, knees on either side of him. Zhan held Yibo’s hips and pulled him down on his as he leaned back against the headboard and thrust up into a half erect Yibo. Yibo moaned into Zhan’s mouth and pushed down harder, craving the friction. 

Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo’s hips and Yibo adjusted himself as Zhan crossed his legs under him. With one strong push, Zhan stood up on his knees and Yibo, thought taken aback, wrapped his legs around Zhan. 

Carefully, never once stopping the fervent kissing, Zhan got off the bed with Yibo straddling him. Zhan bit Yibo’s lips, smirking as he felt Yibo’s erection grow. He walked them to the bathroom and sat Yibo on the bathroom counter, pushing all the bottles and products aside carelessly.

He pushed Yibo back until he was pressed against the mirror and pulled his pants down. Yibo threw his head back with a moan as Zhan bent forward and took his length in his mouth. Zhan kissed the head and licked it all over, giving special attention to the underside.

He deep throated Yibo a few times, drawing loud and lewd moans from Yibo that rang louder in the bathroom. Zhan stood up once more and yanked Yibo’s shirt off and proceeded to remove his own clothes. He pulled Yibo to the edge of the counter and wrapped his legs around himself, kissing him senseless.

He spun them around and pushed Yibo against the wall behind them, biting his neck and groaning as he felt Yibo claw into his back.

”Any photoshoots?” Zhan growled.

”Ye...yes, but you can go lower ge…”

”I have a better idea,” Zhan licked Yibo’s chest as he thrust against him, pounding him into the wall a few times, kissing him passionately..

Eventually, he put Yibo down in front of the bathroom mirror and turned him around in a rough motion, Zha grabbed his neck from behind and bent him over until Yibo’s face was plastered against the cold counter.

Yibo gasped as the cool surface made contact with his flush, heated skin. Zhan bent over Yibo and began sucking his way down Yibo’s back, maintaining a tight grip on Yibo’s neck to keep him pinned. He only let go when he reached Yibo’s ass.

Zhan slapped the plump cheeks twice eliciting erotic screams from Yibo who now had raised his head to look at Zhan in the mirror. Yibo’s eyes widened when Zhan knelt down with a smirk and disappeared behind his ass.

Zhan stretched his cheeks apart and without wasting another second, latched onto the pink opening that he craved to be inside. Yibo moaned helplessly as Zhan ate him fervently and impatiently. Zhan kneaded Yibo’s ass, leaving red marks on the delicate skin, and continued licking and prodding and probing the opening with his tongue.

”You’re so fucking delicious,” Zhan spoke in a low voice in between licks.

He fucked Yibo with his tongue and eventually pulled a bottle of lube from the drawer. He coated his fingers in the cool liquid and inserted one finger in. Yibo’s face fell against the counter once more as he moaned in pleasure. Zhan quickly inserted a second finger and scissored him open. He thrust into Yibo until he found the spot that sent Yibo into a spiral.

”Ge…,” Yibo gasped against the counter. “Fuck…”

When Yibo’s opening sucked in Zhan’s third finger, Zhan lined himself with Yibo and, groping his ass, pushed into him. His hand reached for Yibo’s hair and he yanked his face off the counter.

”Look at yourself,” Zhan gripped Yibo’s hair mercilessly as he thrust into him, setting a slow rhythm. “Look how fucking beautiful you look when you’re wrecked by me.” Zhan growled, licking his lips.

Yibo looked at the mirror, shifting his hungry eyes from a ravishing Zhan to his own reflection. He felt his stomach tingle as he blushed at the way he looked, flushed, sweaty, and helpless under Zhan’s grip.

”You like it, huh?” Zhan smirked as he pounded into Yibo once more.

Yibo watched his face turn into one of pleasure and pain as he moaned. He felt his breath hitch looking at himself in such a lewd, erotic state and saw Zhan’s eyes darken as he let our heavy breaths.

”You’re fucking beautiful, Wang Yibo,” Zhan spoke in a low voice, thrusting into him fast again. “And only I get to wreck you like this.”

”Ahh,” Yibo moaned again as he watched himself shake from the thrust. “Is this...from your _list_...”

Yibo smirked as he saw Zhan flush but only for a moment because after that, Zhan increased his pace and pound into him again and again with low grunts. The whole time, Zhan never let go of Yibo’s hair. Yibo found the pain oddly satisfying as Zhan’s other hand groped at his shoulder, his nipple, his hip, his ass, slapping them whenever Yibo looked away from the mirror.

For the next several minutes, the bathroom echoed with the grunts and moans of the two lovers. 

”Ge...I’m...I’m going to…”

Before Yibo could complete his sentence, he came gushing out against the bathroom counter. Zhan fucked him through his climax even as he felt Yibo shudder and eventually go limp. Within a few more seconds, a sweaty, breathless Zhan came inside Yibo and fell against his back.

”Bo-di…,” Zhan murmured against his neck. “That felt amazing...you’re amazing,” Zhan kissed his way down Yibo’s back, lapping at each hickey that he had bit into Yibo.”

”Come here,” Zhan stood up finally and turned Yibo around, “let’s take a shower, hmm?”

Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s neck and leaned in for a kiss.

“You’re like clay in my hands...I can do whatever I want.” Zhan murmured as he brushed a hair strand away from Yibo’s eyes.

”Always, ge...you can do whatever the fuck you want with me if it’s gonna feel like this,” Yibo smirked and gently moved his hips against Zhan’s.

They kissed until they were breathless again and as Zhan led them into the shower, Yibo caught a smirk on Zhan’s face. When he looked down, he could see Zhan’s erection at full mast and as soon he entered the shower, two hands spun him around and pushed him against the tiled wall.

”Be careful of the promises you make, didi,” Zhan bit Yibo’s ear.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo yelped with a giggle but moaned the next moment as he felt Zhan’s hardness enter him for the second time. 


	103. There are three bedrooms

* * *

The next two weeks went by in a haze of shoots and auditions and Yibo’s busy schedule. Before they knew it, April was almost over.

”I think now is a good time for their visit, ge. I have a relatively free schedule and then I'm going to have my preliminary qualifiers for the race. If I qualify, I'm going to be at the track whenever I get the chance for the next few months for the August race again...and we’re going to get busy with the bazaar shoot, we have the celebration party with the cast, and then before we know it, the untamed will be releasing and all the promotion events are going to be crazy.”

”Okay, okay...firstly...you WILL qualify...and secondly, calm down...why are you so,” Zhan waved his arms around to indicate how hyper Yibo looked, “worked up?”

”Sorry,” Yibo grinned. “I just want this to happen so bad and I don't want to delay it for after.”

”Okay, didi. Let’s do it now…,” Zhan laughed and shook his head. “It’s mid may...will your dad be free? My parents won't have a problem coming here for a bit.” 

”My mom will make sure he is,” Yibo chuckled.

* * *

”Aunty!” Yibo exclaimed as he opened the door and saw Zhan’s mother waiting excitedly.

”A-Bo!!” Zhan’s mother squealed and threw her arms wide open.

He rushed forward for a hug and sighed when she enveloped him in her short arms. After several seconds of being held in the tight and warm embrace, Yibo straightened himself and bowed to Zhan’s father, who stood a step behind her. 

”Hello Uncle,” Yibo bowed respectfully.

”Nice to see you again, Wang Yibo,” Zhan’s father smiled and nodded, patting Yibo’s arm.

”I’m so glad you were able to come...come in please,” Yibo grabbed the two bags and led them inside.

”Where’s Zhan-Zhan?” Zhan’s mother asked as she observed the changes in the apartment since her last visit.

”He’s running late...some important meeting with his management,” Yibo replied with a smile.

”Oh...they’re still giving him trouble, no?” She looked at Yibo with a dejected look. 

”It’ll be alright soon, aunty,” Yibo walked over and wrapped one arm around her shoulders. “Zhan-ge is strong. And in another month or so our drama will air. Wait and watch aunty, he is going to become a superstar after that. His management won't be able to bother him even a bit after that!”

”Ah, you sweet boy,” Zhan’s mother patted Yibo’s cheek. “I’m glad he has you here...you take care of each other.”

Yibo blushed but then pulled himself together and led them further in.

”This is your room, aunty...uncle,” he placed the bags by the bed and gestured. “Why don't you freshen up? Zhan-ge said you both should eat soon. You must be tired.”

”Ah okay okay,” she nodded and then turned to her husband, “Why don't you use the shower first?”

When Zhan’s father had gone to shower, she left the room and joined Yibo in the kitchen as he warmed up the food Zhan had cooked earlier. 

”Yibo,” she whispered and stood close to him. 

”Yes, aunty?” Yibo replied casually as he focused on his task.

”There are three bedrooms here, no?”

”Yes aunty…,” Yibo carefully emptied the contents of one container into a bowl to heat up.

”And your parents will be using the second one, no?”

”Yes, aunty…,” Yibo frowned and wiped the gravy that had spilled onto the counter. 

”So will you and Zhan-Zhan share the third room?”

”Yes, aunty,” Yibo replied and turned to put the bowl in the microwave and came face to face with Zhan’s mother.

It was then that Yibo’s brain caught up with his mouth.

_Fuck._

”Hmm,” Zhan’s mother crossed her arms across her chest and narrowed her eyes on Yibo.

”I mean...no, aunty,” Yibo stuttered. “I will be...sleeping on the couch…”

”For two nights?”

”Yes...no...I mean Zhan-ge and I will alternate on the couch.”

”And where do you sleep normally?”

”My parents will be sleeping in my room,” Yibo smiled nervously.

”Oh? Let me go see _your_ room,” with those words she walked out of the kitchen.

_Fuck. How did we forget to deal with this?!?! All my things are in Zhan-ge’s room!!”_

”Yibo…” he heard her call out.

Yibo placed the bowl on the counter carelessly and fled towards the room.

”You keep everything so neat and clean,” she looked around the room, surprised. “Nothing scattered around...not even any clothes or photos…”

”I...I’m not...I don't like clutter…”

”Not even family photos?!”

”N...no aunty,” Yibo grew more nervous with every question.

”Tch...you should keep some family photos around, A-Bo,” she shook her head and clucked her tongue. “Let me see Zhan’s room...if he doesn’t have any photos of us, I'll be so mad!” She made her way out of the room and towards Zhan and Yibo’s bedroom.

_Fuck._

Yibo dashed out once again and was about to stop her by grabbing her arm when Zhan’s father poked his head out of the other room.

”I’m done, darling...you can use the shower now.”

”Wait a minute, I was jus…,” she began but was interrupted by Yibo.

”No, no aunty,” he held her arm and led her towards her room, “You should freshen up...you had a long trip...shower now so you can eat soon!”

”Okay okay,” she nodded and went into the room.

”What was that about?” Zhan’s father raised an eyebrow at Yibo once she had shut the door.

”Noth..nothing, uncle…,” Yibo flushed. 

”You look...strange...are you okay?” Zhan’s father looked at him suspiciously.

Just then the doorbell rang and Yibo found himself yelling at the top of his voice out of nervousness.

”Look at that! Zhan-ge’s here!! I’ll get the door!”

Zhan’s father looked at Yibo weird and blinked.

”Okay…,” he mumbled slowly. “You do that..I forgot my glasses,” he shook his head as he made his way to his room.

_Fuck._

Yibo ran to the door and prayed that Zhan was on the other side of the door. But when he opened it, his heart skipped a few beats.

”Bo-bo!!”

”Mom?” Yibo scowled and then immediately schooled his face. “I mean….mom! You’re here!” He feigned excitement.

Yibo’s mom walked into the apartment immediately and hugged him. 

”My baby! I missed you!!”

Behind her, Yibo’s father walked in, bags in hand, and smiled gently at Yibo. When Yibo’s mom finally left him, he walked over to his father and they exchanged a quick hug.

”Wow...this place is so nice...it’s well decorated and so much better than your childish half-empty apartment,” Yibo’s mom rolled her eyes.

”Yeah...yeah,” Yibo frowned and then remembered that Zhan’s parents were still in their room and if he played his cards right, he could usher his parents into their room and somehow shove some of his things under Zhan and his bed.

”Here…,” Yibo yanked his mom by the wrist, “this is your room...come come...quick...I mean you should freshen up and we’ll talk about everything over dinner and Zhan-ge is not home and…,” he entered their room and gestured, “this is my room but you can use it...I’ll be on the couch and ....yes I don't have a lot of things on display...I don't like clutter...and this is my room...only mine...and you should shower,” Yibo rambled on, his voice getting louder with each word, and then he rushed out of the room leaving behind a very confused pair of parents.

Yibo ran into his room and hurried about grabbing some obvious items like his skateboard, his clothes that were strewn about, his slippers, the lego piece he had just assembled and some other odd items and shoved them all under the bed. With a sigh of relief, he emerged from the room just in time as Zhan’s parents came out into the living room mere seconds later.

”Is Zhan here?” Zhan’s mother inquired.

”No...that was...actually my parents are here,” Yibo took a deep breath and relaxed his entire body.

_Keep it together. Crisis averted. Act normal._

”Oh, they’re here!” Zhan’s mother clasped her hands together. “I can't wait to meet them.”

As if on cue, the other bedroom door opened and out stepped Yibo’s parents.

”I thought I heard sounds out here,” Yibo’s mom smiled and then bowed at Zhan’s parents.

”Hello!” Zhan’s mother walked towards her and bowed. “It’s good to finally meet you!”

”I think we can hug,” Yibo’s mom beamed and wrapped her arms around Zhan’s mother for a brief moment.

Yibo smiled as he saw the scene unfold. As the parents acquainted themselves with each other, there was no awkwardness or formality. The living room was filled with warm smiles and fond chatter, mainly from the mothers.

Suddenly Yibo noticed Zhan’s mother leaning in and whispering something in his mom’s ears, who listened intently and nodded. Before he could think or say anything further, the doorbell rang again.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo blurted. “I mean that must be Zhan-ge. I’ll…”

”You’ll get the door?” Zhan’s father raised an eyebrow and looked at him weird again. 

”Umm...yeah...I’ll do that,” Yibo scratched his head and scrambled for the door.

This time, when Yibo opened the door, it was indeed Zhan on the other side, beaming as he saw Yibo. Zhan opened his arms wide to hug Yibo and was about to say something probably sweet and romantic when he paused as Yibo put his finger to his lips.

”Shhh,” Yibo whispered and then pointed his finger over his back discreetly. “They’re here...and we forgot to…,” but before Yibo could finish warning him, Zhan’s mother appeared and embraced her son.

”Ahh! My Zhan-Zhan! You’re finally here!”

”Hi mama!” Zhan sighed into the hug and held her close for several seconds.

Zhan looked over and noticed the remaining group standing in the living room. He walked in, arm in arm with his mother, and smiled and bowed at everyone.

”Where’s my hug?!” Yibo’s mom pouted playfully..

Zhan laughed as he walked over to her only to be pulled into a long warm embrace.

”A-Zhan! It’s so good to see you!”

”I’m glad you could come, aunty,” Zhan smiled as he returned the hug.

When they had all finished their greetings and welcomes, Yibo’s mom spoke.

”It’s a beautiful apartment, Zhan-Zhan...so well done...and there are three bedrooms! Much better and much more spacious than Yibo’s.

Yibo’s ears perked up at the mention of the bedrooms.

”Thank you, aunty,” Zhan grinned.

”So...which one is your and Yibo’s bedroom?” 

”That one,” Zhan pointed before either him or Yibo could fully register the question.

_Fuck._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If any of y'all are asians like me...y'all know asian moms and y'all can probably relate to yibo here. lmao. this is based on real events in my life, i kid you not!


	104. Aren't you two cute!

* * *

Zhan’s smile froze on his face as he realized what had just happened. After hesitating for several seconds, he stole a glance at Yibo who was massaging his temples with his fingers, wearing a hopeless look on his face.

”You were right,” Yibo’s mom chuckled and nudged Zhan’s mother, “it worked.”

”What…,” Yibo began as he saw the two women break into giggles.

”Oh come on, Bo-Bo,” Yibo’s mom waved her hand in the air, “that wardrobe in our room is completely empty. You really expected us to believe that was your room?”

Yibo shut his eyes and ran a hand down his face, cursing inwardly. With a deep breath, he glanced at Zhan whose face was still frozen. Unsure of what to do, he just stared at the group dumbly, at an extreme loss for words.

”Okay, okay. Let’s not torment them more," Yibo’s mom shook her head in amusement.

Yibo felt himself release a breath he didn't know he had been holding. He glanced again at Zhan but nothing had changed. Zhan was still rooted to his spot, barely blinking. Yibo stared at him for a few seconds as if willing him to look in his direction, but Zhan didn't unfreeze.

Finally, Yibo caved and walked over to him and shook him gently by the arm.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo tilted his head and observed the still smiling man.

”Zhan-ge?” He waved his hand in front of Zhan’s eyes but to no avail.

”Sweetheart?” Yibo leaned in and whispered as softly as he could. 

As soon as he uttered that word, Zhan snapped out of his horror with a jerk and his eyes widened and he swung around, slapping Yibo’s mouth shut with his hand.

”Yibo!”

”Ow! Zhan-ge!” Yibo scowled and moved his hand away, massaging his red lips. 

Zhan gulped as his eyes darted about the room, eventually landing on Yibo.

”Did I just…”

”Tell them we sleep on the same bed? Yep…”

”Did they just…”

”Lay the trap and then tell us they already knew? Yep.”

Zhan shut his eyes and bit his lips.

”How did we not think of this!?” Zhan whispered.

”How indeed!” Zhan’s mother exclaimed as she and Yibo’s mom broke into peals of laughter. “Oh come on now, enough of this. We’re just teasing.”

”Come come, let’s have dinner,” Yibo’s mom gestured to the dining table.

Zhan and Yibo nodded slowly, rubbing the back of their necks simultaneously, firmly avoiding all eye contact with their fathers, who did the same.

* * *

The dinner was awkward solely for Zhan and Yibo who looked down almost the entire time. The parents, on the other hand, got along like a house on fire. If they hadn't been drowning in mortification, Zhan and Yibo would have enjoyed the growing camaraderie. 

When dinner was done, they offered to clean up, pushing their parents to their bedrooms so they could rest after their exhausting trips.

”We have no work commitments tomorrow, mama,” Zhan assured. “We can spend the whole day together. For now, please get some rest.”

”Okay, fine...I am,” she paused to yawn, “tired I guess.”

”Me too,” both fathers added simultaneously and startled.

With some more words of affection and goodnights, the parents turned in for the night, leaving Zhan and Yibo to clean up and do the dishes.

”So...that was…,” Zhan began quietly.

”Yeah…,” Yibo replied just as quietly.

The two remained in silence for a few moments before turning to look at each other. They remained expressionless for a while but then a spark lit up in each of their eyes. Their lips curled inwards and with a snort, they burst into a fit of laughter.

”Fuck, Zhan-ge….you have no idea,” Yibo managed to speak between his chuckles, “how much I ran around trying to get them in their rooms so I could hide my stuff in our room...I can't believe it didn't strike me that my supposed room was devoid of any of my personal belongings…,” Yibo began laughing harder until he was red in the face.

”I can't believe I was stupid enough to fall for that trick…,” Zhan fell to his knees laughing as he clutched his stomach. “They are so sneaky….!!”

”You should have seen your face,” Yibo wiped the tears from the corner of his eyes. “You were like a statue for a good minute.”

”Hey!” Zhan pouted but broke into giggles again. “My mind just shut down!! I was terrified...that was so embarrassing.”

”Well...at least they were cool about it...except the dads…”

”I wouldn't know...I avoided papa’s eyes like the plague.”

”Me too...couldn't bear to look at dad…”

”Everyone seems to be getting along though,” Zhan sighed with a smile as he stood up and took a deep breath, ending his giggle fit.

”Yeah,” Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and pulled him close.

”Hey…,” Zhan’s face softened.

”Hi…,” Yibo smiled back and leaned in to place a kiss on Zhan’s lips.

Before their lips could touch, they heard someone clear their throat.

”Aww...aren’t you two cute!”

They jumped apart abruptly and Yibo hit his hip against the kitchen counter.

”Mom!?” He sputtered when he turned and saw his mom smirking.

”Don't mind me...just came to fill this jug with some water…,” she shrugged and walked between them, placing the jug in the sink and turning the tap on.

She stood there casually as if nothing had happened.

”So,” she smiled innocently at Zhan, “What’re you two upto?”

”Nothing…,” Zhan blushed and looked away. “Just clearing things up so we can go sleep.”

”Ah yes, to your shared bedroom…,” she winked. 

”Mom,” Yibo grunted and turned the tap off. “The jug is full.”

”Aww...Bo-Bo,” she pinched Yibo’s cheek, “shoo-ing me away so you can kiss your pretty boyfriend?”

”Mom!!” Yibo groaned.

”Fine...fine...I’m going...goodnight, Zhan-Zhan,” she smiled and pinched Zhan’s cheek too.

”Goodnight, aunty,” Zhan’s eyes crinkled into half moons as his eyes lit up.

When she was gone, Yibo sighed and covered his face with his hand.

”Sorry about that….mom can be so embarrassing sometimes!”

”Come here,” Zhan moved Yibo’s hands away and pulled him closer, “now where were we?”

Yibo grinned as Zhan pulled him even closer and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. He wrapped his arms around his waist again and deepened the kiss. They played with each other’s lips softly and rocked gently from side to side.

”Let’s go to our room,” Zhan chuckled.

”Mmm,” Yibo rubbed their noses together. “Let’s go to our room,” his hands slid down Zhan’s waist to his ass.

”Bo-di…,” Zhan shot him a warning look. “There’s no way we are having sex with our parents in the next room. This isn't a big house like your parent’s!”

”Not even a little bit?” Yibo pouted.

”Nothing…”

”Not even some third base stuff,” Yibo whispered and batted his eyelids.

Zhan bit his lips to suppress his laughter in an attempt to stay stern but failed. He pinched both of Yibo’s cheeks and kissed his nose.

”Brat!”

”Your brat,” Yibo grinned.

”My brat…,” Zhan planted a kiss on his lips and smiled.

”I love you, ge…”

”Love you too, didi.”


	105. You're a good boy

* * *

The next morning, Zhan woke up early knowing his parents would be up early too. To his surprise, when he stepped out of his room still groggy, all four parents were seated on the couches drinking tea and chatting quietly.

”Zhan-Zhan!” Zhan’s mother cooed. “You’re awake! Come here...”

Zhan scratched his head and smiled as he sat on the floor near his mother and laid his head on her lap. He sighed as she caressed his hair and continued chatting with the rest.

”And where’s my son?” Yibo’s mom grinned. “Still snoring away I assume?”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded and chuckled. 

”As expected,” she rolled her eyes. 

”By the way,” Zhan’s mother said, “there’s been a slight change of plans...your dad has to leave tonight because something’s come up at work...could you change his flight, A-Zhan?”

”Oh,” Zhan sat up and pouted. “Do you really have to?”

”Sorry,” Zhan’s father apologized. “I wish I didn't but it can't be helped. I don't mean to be rude…,” he turned to Yibo’s parents.

”Nonsense!” Yibo’s father waved his hand. “Don't worry about it...I’m leaving tonight too...I could only take a short time off...have some important business meetings tomorrow. We can go to the airport together.”

”But you two are still going to be here, right?” Zhan frowned at both the mothers.

”Who can say no to that face?” Yibo’s mom laughed. “Of course we are.”

”Good,” Zhan smiled and laid his head back on his mother’s lap.

The conversation continued to flow until Zhan heard a door open and when he looked up, a very sleepy Yibo walked out of the room. 

_He looks so cute!_ Zhan mused. _I wish I could kiss him right now._

Yibo smiled at Zhan and then joined his mom on the couch.

”Ah, Bo-Bo,” she kissed his cheek. “Good morning.”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and leaned against her shoulder. “Morning.”

”So what’s the plan for the day?” Yibo’s dad asked.

”Do you guys want to go out?” Yibo asked as he yawned.

”Bo-di,” Zhan sat up and looked at him, eyebrows furrowed. “You know that’s...not a good idea, right?”

”Oh,” Yibo froze, suddenly fully awake, “yeah...sorry...I forgot…”

Silence reigned as the reality of the situation sunk in. Their little family bubble had become so comfortable that for a moment, Yibo had forgotten that the outside world was not the same. He looked at Zhan apologetically for bringing down everyone’s mood and as if knowing what he must be thinking, Zhan gave him a small smile and shook his head.

”Who wants to go out any way!” Zhan’s mother broke the uncomfortable silence. “I want to stay home with my sons and talk all day!”

Zhan and Yibo’s eyes lit up at her words but Zhan’s father groaned.

”Great...more talking,” he chuckled teasingly.

Yibo’s dad smirked at him and they shook their heads, laughing.

”How about you two go make breakfast then, if you’re not up for talking?” Zhan’s mother raised an eyebrow.

”That’s a wonderful idea!” Yibo’s mother snorted and clapped her hands together. “Yibo’s dad is an amazing cook.”

”No, I’m not.”

”No, he’s not,” Yibo replied at the same time as his dad.

”Exactly,” she grinned. “Never too late to learn.”

”Papa cooks really well…,” Zhan grinned.

”Come on, then,” Zhan’s father smiled and gestured to Yibo’s dad, “you can help me...better than sitting here and…,” he paused mid sentence and pursed his lips, bowing out without finishing his sentence.

Zhan giggled as he watched the two men walk away and the mothers laugh in amusement.

* * *

As the day progressed, the conversations morphed into friendly banters and old stories and career talks. After breakfast, the mothers took their turn making lunch. The day ended with Zhan and Yibo helping the mothers cook dinner only to be kicked out of the kitchen due to their constant fighting and bickering.

After dinner, everyone sat around playing board games and Zhan and Yibo taught their parents some of their video games. As it turned out, Zhan’s mother and Yibo’s father were naturals and ended up competing with each other for bragging rights.

”Come on, mama,” Zhan egged her on from behind as his father sat beside her watching in awe.

”Come on, dad!!” Yibo exclaimed as she nearly took out his character. “You can do this! Go left! No, left!!”

Yibo’s mom sat back uninterested in the game. But as her eyes swept across the group, she sighed quietly and smiled. Zhan’s father glanced at her absentmindedly but did a double take when he noticed the expression on her face as she gazed at everyone. 

He turned around and looked at the scene as well and felt his heart bask in the warmth around. In that moment, Zhan’s father felt a familial connection sprout in his heart. He looked at his wife and then at Zhan, who was laser focussed on the game. He looked at Yibo’s dad who was biting his lips as he maneuvered around an attack. Finally, his eyes landed on Yibo who, although engrossed in the game, kept looking over at Zhan too.

When Zhan’s mother launched her final big attack, Zhan jumped onto his knees and cheered her on with gusto. Zhan’s father watched as Yibo turned around discreetly and a soft smile spread across his face as he watched Zhan and his mother do a celebratory victory dance.

”Looks like it’s 1 for the Xiao’s and 0 for the Wang’s!” Yibo’s mom snapped Zhan’s father out of his silent observations. 

”That was awesome, aunty!” Yibo’s jaw dropped and he clapped for her. “I’m switching sides…”

”Aww...Bo-Bo...are you saying you want to become a Xiao?”

Both Zhan and Yibo choked as the families burst into laughter, once again at their expense.

* * *

Later that night, as both fathers got ready to leave reluctantly, Zhan watched as his father moved about silently. He wasn't sure if this trip had done much to help them but it made him feel lighter that the parents had gotten along with each other. Although he hadn't gotten to speak with his father about Yibo since their visit to Chongqing, he had felt better seeing them interact casually. 

Still, Zhan would have liked it if he could see some sureshot sign that his father had truly accepted and loved Yibo in the same way his mother had.

”Alright, off we go,” Yibo’s dad hugged Yibo and planted a kiss on his mom’s cheek. 

”Take care,” Zhan’s mother hugged her husband and adjusted his collar, “Message me when you reach home.”

Zhan hugged his father and watched as Yibo walked towards them and bowed to his father.

”It was nice meeting you again, Yibo,” he smiled and bowed to both him and his mom. 

”We shall see each other again soon,” Yibo’s mom grinned and bowed back.

”Yes, yes,” he smiled and nodded. “A-Bo…,” he addressed Yibo suddenly. “Come here…”

Zhan froze as he heard the term of endearment and saw the look of astonishment on Yibo’s face as well. Yibo stepped forward and waited. Zhan’s father reached into his bag and brought a small box out. He handed it to Yibo and gestured for him to open it.

Zhan cocked his head in an attempt to see what was in the box but couldn't. He waited patiently as Yibo unwrapped the gift and opened the top of the box. Zhan heart a chain like sound as Yibo reached in to pick up whatever was in it.

”It’s for you,” Zhan’s father said. “It matches the one Zhan-Zhan has.”

Zhan’s curiosity grew even more on hearing those words and he took a step closer and peeked over Yibo’s shoulder. His mouth opened in surprise as Yibo pulled out a beautiful wrist watch that was indeed, a matching pair to the one he had been gifted the previous year on his birthday by his parents. The only difference was that this one was a little wider to suit Yibo’s hand better.

”Do you like it?” Zhan’s father asked gently. “Try it on…”

”I...I…,” Yibo was at a loss for words. 

”Here,” Zhan’s father took it from his hand and slid it onto his wrist. He clasped it into place and held Yibo’s hand up to show Zhan’s mother, who nodded approvingly.

”That looks perfect,” Yibo’s mom smiled. “Yibo?”

”I…,” Yibo looked up from the watch to Zhan’s father, “It’s…,” he felt his voice crack and the back of his eyes burn.

To add to both Zhan and Yibo’s astonishment, Zhan’s father then leaned forward and pulled Yibo down for a hug. He wrapped his arms around his back gently and patted it.

”You’re a good boy, A-Bo,” he spoke in a kind voice. “You’re a good boy.”

Zhan felt his eyes tear up and he turned away to quickly wipe the corners.

”Well,” Yibo’s dad smiled and patted Zhan’s back. “So is A-Zhan.”

He wrapped one arm around Zhan and pulled Yibo closer with the other one.

”You both take care...and if you need anything...let us know,” Yibo’s dad continued and then looked at Zhan, “especially you, A-Zhan...if this boy troubles you, just call his mother and she will set him straight.”

”Dad!!”

As everyone laughed at Yibo’s scowling face, Zhan’s father walked over to Zhan who was patting his eyes. He pulled him into a hug and held him tight while whispering into his ear.

”He loves you a lot. You were right...once I got to know him...none of that other stuff mattered.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last line Zhan's father says to him is a reference to their conversation in Chapter 91 when YiZhan visited them in Chongqing.
> 
> Also, this is the watch that I'm imagining:
> 
> https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LX6DOmpWazE/maxresdefault.jpg
> 
> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/ECp2_QqUIAELpZS.jpg


	106. One big happy family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a note: I made a small change to the start of chapter 103!

* * *

”I didn't expect that from dad,” Zhan whispered as he helped his mother spread new sheets on her bed.

”I didn't know he had that watch for Yibo either,” she smiled and sighed. “But...it was nice...I think...I think this trip was exactly what he needed...to see you two...in your own home...together.”

Zhan blushed as he fluffed the pillow before placing it at the head of the bed. He looked up when he heard a gentle tap on the door.

”Got you some water, aunty…,” Yibo poked his head inside. “Are you ready to sleep?”

”I have a better idea!” An enthusiastic voice overshadowed Yibo’s gentle inquiry. “Let’s all stay up and do something. We leave tomorrow night too, jiejie!”

”Oh! That’s a great idea!” Zhan’s mother lit up. “Do you boys have work tomorrow?”

”I only have one short shoot tomorrow afternoon,” Yibo shrugged and looked at Zhan.

”Just some rehearsals at the studio for some new songs the other boys are working on...wanted my help with the vocals but I can postpone that or make it overlap with Yibo’s thing so we’re not away too long…”

”Good, come,” Zhan’s mother grabbed his hand and led him out to the living room. “Let’s sit outside.”

Yibo flipped through the channels to find something interesting while Zhan sat on the ground between his mother’s legs as she massaged his head.

”Did you know, mama,” Zhan spoke with his eyes closed as he enjoyed the head massage, ”Yibo will be racing in a few days….he’s officially part of Yamaha’s team and once he qualifies in the upcoming race, he’ll compete in August!”

”Wow...what kind of racing!?”

”Bike, mama,” Zhan chuckled.

”Oh! That sounds dangerous…”

”That’s what I said,” Yibo’s mom pursed her lips. “But this boy…”

”I enjoy racing, mom,” Yibo rolled his eyes. “And it’s very safe...I have a whole professional team and we take all the safety precautions.”

”Don't you feel scared, Zhan-Zhan?” Yibo’s mom turned her attention to Zhan.

Zhan paused for a moment before opening his eyes. He saw Yibo looking at him curiously. He had never voiced his opinions about racing. He supported Yibo wholeheartedly and just kept reminding him to be careful before every practice session.

”Yeah,” Zhan whispered barely audible. “It does.”

Yibo’s eyes widened as he heard Zhan’s response.

”Really? You never said anything before!” He crawled and sat beside Zhan, looking worried.

”I…,” Zhan glanced around nervously realizing this was probably not the time for this conversation, “I support you...and I know you will be careful, Bo-di,” Zhan managed a smile.

”But you’re scared everytime I go to the tracks?”

”Bo-di…”

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo raised an eyebrow stubbornly. 

”A little,” Zhan sighed and closed his eyes.

”Of course he would be...I was terrified when you told me...and I don't know your day to day schedule so I can pretend you’re not biking at a 1000 miles per hour! But Zhan is here everyday and has to go about his day knowing your putting yourself at risk that very moment.” She scolded.

Yibo’s frown dissipated at her words and he shot her a guilty, apologetic look.

_I just want to hug Zhan-ge._ Yibo thought ruefully. 

Zhan saw the slight pout forming on Yibo’s face and couldn't help but giggle.

”It’s okay, aunty,” Zhan smiled, “I know he’s more than capable of doing this...he’s going to be the best there is!”

It took all his willpower for Yibo to not kiss him senseless. Zhan must have seen it in his eyes and shot him a warning glare. Seeing his bunny face turn into a stern one that looked even cuter, Yibo couldn't help but look at him with love and affection.

”Oh for god’s sake,” Yibo’s mom threw her hands up in the air. “Just kiss him already...we’re not blind and we don't live under any delusion that you two haven't kissed already...I remember coming to the kitchen last night and…”

”MOM!” Yibo shrieked and covered his face.

Zhan’s mother chuckled and tapped Zhan on his shoulder gently.

”You don't have to hide from us...we love seeing you happy,” she grinned. 

”Of course you don't need to show us _everything_ ,” Yibo’s mom held her hands up with a smirk.

”Oh my god,” Yibo groaned.

Zhan blushed and looked away. Seeing him react that way prompted Yibo’s heart to flutter and he found himself leaning forward and placing a chaste kiss on Zhan’s cheek causing him to blush harder.

”Alright, you two,” Zhan’s mother shook her head. “But on a more serious note, A-Bo...your parents live far away...what if something happens...who’s your guardian here?”

”Zhan-ge can be my guardian,” Yibo shrugged before even processing his own words.

Both mothers turned their gaze to an oblivious Yibo while Zhan felt his heart stop beating.

”A-Bo,” Zhan’s mother was the first to speak. “Do you mean...legal guardianship?”

”Mama!” Zhan exclaimed and turned to look at her. “I don't think that’s what he meant and how on earth do you know about that?!”

”I researched gay couples online after your visit in Chongqing,” she replied with a proud smile.

”Oh,” Zhan blinked, unsure how to react. 

”But let me tell you one thing,” she addressed Yibo’s mother. “Be careful what you type when searching for this stuff online,” she shook her head.

”Why, jiejie?” Yibo’s mom cocked her head.

”Let’s just say...I found things I had no intention of finding!” Zhan’s mother clucked her tongue and continued shaking her head.

”Mama!!!” Zhan sat up and covered her mouth. “What are you saying….shhhh...and please don't google more things about gay couples….please.”

”I have no intention on doing that,” she replied solemnly.

Meanwhile, Yibo had finally processed his previous words and felt his heart race.

_Did I just say that in front of our parents!? Was Zhan-ge embarrassed or upset? Was it just such a bad thing to say? No. We made promises. This is only natural. And Zhan-ge said he was scared about my biking career. Why the hell not!?_

”I meant it,” Yibo blurted, interrupting the ongoing conversation.

”What?” Zhan turned to Yibo.

”I meant what I said...you can be my _legal_ guardian, Zhan-ge.”

”Yibo…,” Zhan’s eyes flitted nervously to both the mothers. “I think we can talk about this lat…”

”Will you be my legal guardian, Zhan-ge?” Yibo turned his body to face his and asked in all earnestness.

Zhan couldn't believe what was happening. He knew what that meant in China. He knew what meant for them as a couple. He wasn't sure if Yibo knew that. He wasn't sure how to continue this conversation in front of their mothers. But before he could say anything, Yibo’s mother spoke.

”Bo-Bo...do you understand what that means?”

”I’m not stupid, mom,” he gave her a knowing look. “I know what that means,” his voice softened and he held Zhan’s hand in his.

Zhan’s breath hitched as he felt the warmth enclose his hand.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo spoke gently, “We’ve made promises...we both meant them...I’m actually happy our mothers are here because I want them to know as well,” he looked at the women briefly and was surprised to see tears in their eyes, “that I...I am ready...whenever you are.”

”Yibo,” Zhan’s mind was in a tizzy, “I am ready too...but how are we going to...do this without...you know...it getting out?”

”We’ll figure that out,” Yibo smiled and kissed Zhan’s hands.

”We’ll all figure it out...together,” Yibo’s mom knelt beside them and hugged them both.

Zhan’s mother sat on the couch, watching the trio embrace, with tears in her eyes. She kissed both her hands and leaned forward to place her hands on both the boys’ backs. Zhan turned his head towards her, still leaning against Yibo’s mom’s shoulder and smiled.

”I love you Zhan, ge,” Yibo whispered and intertwined their fingers behind his mom’s back, smirking at Zhan’s mother.

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan blushed and hid his face.

Everyone laughed at the uncomfortable boy and eventually pulled away from the embrace. At long last, Yibo found a movie they could all agree on and sat on the floor beside Zhan as their mothers sat on the couch behind them.

They sat side by side, shoulder to shoulder, hip to hip for the rest of the night as they all watched the movie together - laughing, crying, melting, cursing, singing. Just being one big happy family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some info on the legal guardianship thing - 
> 
> https://www.wikiwand.com/en/LGBT_rights_in_China#/Recognition_of_same-sex_relationships


	107. I can't believe it

* * *

When they finally decided to turn in for the night, it was already 2 am. Zhan rubbed his eyes as he headed into the room, followed by an equally sleepy Yibo. Without any further delay, they got into bed and Zhan tucked them in comfortably. He draped himself around Yibo and rested his head in the crook of Yibo’s neck against the pillow.

”Zhan-ge…”

Bo-di…,” Zhan smiled with his eyes closed.

”I’m so happy…”

”Hmm, me too...this was a great idea...having the family over…”

”No…I mean I’m so happy...in my life…”

”Me too, didi,” Zhan looked at Yibo, “So happy.”

”I feel like I can do anything...I can do everything.”

”You can, sweetie,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s cheek.

”Can I?”

”Of course, you can do anything you want, Yibo.”

”Can I?” Yibo smirked and rolled over Zhan and sat on top of him, his face lingering mere inches above Zhan’s.

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan chuckled at how quickly Yibo had turned his own words against him.

But in the very next second, Zhan pulled Yibo closer and sighed into the kiss. He had waited all day for this and now that he was finally getting a taste of his Yibo, he didn't let go. They made out for the next several minutes, bodies entangled, breaths heavy, lips red and swollen, skin warm, hips grinding against each other, voices low as they moaned into each other’s mouth. 

It had been some time since they had just made out without it leading to anything. There was something innocent about it and yet somehow it felt more erotic than when it lead to sex. The rising tension as their bodies craved more but they had to hold back, the need to scream each other’s names but had to silence each other’s lips, the desire to fuck each other raw but settling for fucking each other’s mouths instead, left them oddly satisfied and satiated.

When the make out ended, they were both panting and sweating, still plastered against each other. Somewhere along the way, their shirts had come off and their skin stuck together.

”We should sleep,” Zhan looked at the clock, still breathless, and was surprised to see that it was nearly 3 am.

”Mmm,” Yibo nodded even as he kissed Zhan’s neck.

”Really, Yibo,” Zhan laughed softly and moved his neck to one side, giving Yibo more access.

”Mmm, tell me to stop,” Yibo whispered.

Zhan sighed as Yibo kept kissing his neck and collarbone and shoulder and chest and up the other side of his neck again.

”Wang Yibo,” Zhan breathed and Yibo felt it send a shiver down his spine. “If you keep going, I won't be able to stop myself. And you know we can't…”

With a long exhale, Yibo pulled away reluctantly and pouted.

”But we can do,” Zhan smirked and reached for Yibo’s erection as his other hand guided Yibo’s hand to his oawn, “some third base stuff,” he winked.

* * *

When it was time for their mothers to leave the next night, there were definitely tears shed. The apartment definitely felt quieter the next day. And the boys definitely felt a little sadder for the next few days.

But it helped that a few days later, Yibo would be on the tracks competing to qualify for the ARRC. It had been obvious that Zhan probably shouldn't attend the event but he had promised Yibo to watch it live. Prior to the race, Zhan had some brand event to attend but he had assured Yibo he would be back home in time for the race.

By the time Zhan was done, he was running late. He knew Yibo’s round was a little later so he still had hope that he would make it home in time. As he sprinted from the car to the apartment, Zhan checked his phone for any updates from Yibo but there were no texts. He rushed inside and nearly tripped over the rug as he lunged forward for the remote. To his immense relief, the race had not yet started and he caught his breath, hands on his knees, before sitting back on the couch.

A few minutes later, Yibo’s race was announced and Zhan watched, half in fascination and half in sheer horror as Yibo zoomed ahead from the beginning. His heart stopped each time Yibo made a turn and tilted almost completely until his knee touched the ground. Once the race ended, Zhan released his breath and then punched his fist in the air, celebrating Yibo’s victory. He immediately opened his phone and began typing.

> _Zhan: Bo-di!!! Congratulations!!_ 🥳 🥳 🥳 _  
>   
>  Zhan: You did it!!! _😘 😘 😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Call me when you have the time!  
>    
>  Zhan: I love you! _

Zhan placed his phone aside and continued watching as the cameras caught the next rounds of racers, interspersed with shots of the pit. He frowned when he couldn't catch a glimpse of Yibo so he picked his phone up again and scrolled through Weibo.

Sure enough, as soon as he searched for him, tons of videos popped up of his boyfriend in the amazing green biking gear. He gulped when he saw Yibo remove his helmet and run his hand through his sweaty hair. His whole body heated up when he saw Yibo pose on his bike or talk to his team or drink water and spray some on his face to cool down.

Zhan felt his dick twitch as he scrolled through video after video and was about to indulge himself when his phone pinged.

> _Bo-di: You watched it!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Thanks, ge. I won!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: I can't believe it! I can't wait for tomorrow!  
>    
>  Zhan: I knew you could do it, didi!  
>    
>  Zhan: Also...you look fucking hot...was watching some of the videos…  
>    
>  Zhan: Definitely gonna jack off to you in your racing gear tonight  
>    
>  Bo-di: Fuck  
>    
>  Bo-di: I wish I could see that  
>    
>  Zhan: You can you know…  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’ll call you when I get to my room later, okay?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Don't touch yourself until then…  
>    
>  Zhan: Can't make any promises  
>    
>  Bo-di: Zhan-ge!  
>    
>  Bo-di: If you wait, I’ll come on the call in my gear…_😏 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Fuck. Deal. _

Later that night, Zhan waited patiently for Yibo’s call. But it never came. Before Zhan knew it, he had dozed off against the headboard, phone in hand. 

* * *

The next morning, Zhan woke up to a terrible ache in his neck and several texts from Yibo.

> _Bo-di: Zhan-ge! I’m so so sorry…_ 😫 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: I dozed off! I was so tired. Sorry, ge!  
>    
>  Zhan: It’s okay, Bo-di...I guessed that you were tired.  
>    
>  Bo-di: So you’re not mad?  
>    
>  Zhan: Of course not, didi! I love you...we can do some biker role playing later _😉 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: You’re the best...can't wait _😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Okay, have to go now! Will you be able to watch today’s race?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yes! Good luck, sweetie! Stay safe.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Always _😘 

In the evening, Zhan came home mentally saturated from an audition for another movie. He had high hopes for that audition and had received very positive feedback. Satisfied but exhausted, he planted his feet on the coffee table and leaned back and turned the TV on.

After a long round of commentary, interviews and prep, finally Yibo’s race was about to begin. Zhan felt himself drool a little when he saw Yibo in the lineup. His knees felt weak when Yibo revved his bike. All of a sudden, Yibo put his fist up in the air and Zhan thought for a second that he was pumping himself up to start the race.

But Zhan sensed something was wrong when Yibo looked around a little frantic and kept his hand up. He saw worriedly as Yibo toyed with the bike while two men ran towards him. One of the men pushed Yibo on the bike and they brought him to the pit where more crew members came out in a rush.

Zhan gasped when he realized the race had begun while Yibo was still getting his bike checked. He cursed at the TV as Yibo’s team struggled with the bike. But soon, he breathed a sigh of relief when Yibo took off and joined the race.

Zhan cheered, even as his heart stilled each time Yibo took a turn, when Yibo managed to shorten the gap and complete his lap. But then Zhan stilled. Something was wrong again. It seemed as if Yibo was slowing down.

He sat at the edge of the couch when he saw Yibo come to a complete halt in the middle of the track. He nearly shrieked when he saw the other bikes race past him and held his breath until Yibo was able to walk to the edge of the track with his bike.

He watched helplessly as Yibo tried to run with the bike, maybe in an effort to get it started. He saw Yibo struggle with the weight of the bike in addition to all his gear. He watched as Yibo paused, looked up at the sky, and then move the bike off the track and onto the grass.

Zhan knew at that moment that Yibo had made the decision to forfeit. To give up. And he knew just how hard that must have been on Yibo. Yibo stood by his bike, alone. Zhan’s entire body hurt when he saw Yibo lean over his bike, shoulders shaking, as he broke down.

Yibo somehow stood up and let the bike fall to the ground. He walked away from the track without so much as glancing back.

Zhan sat still. Tears were flowing down his cheeks. He wept as his mind replayed the image of Yibo standing alone with his bike, crying. He picked up his phone and somehow managed to make some swipes and type quickly even as his vision blurred with his tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two quick disclaimers -  
> 1\. I don't know anything about biking or moto gp. I did some bare minimum research but as always my focus is more on the emotions and story than these intricate details. So, sorry if there are inaccuracies.  
> 2\. In my story, I am working on the assumption that Zhan's workload is light until the untamed boosts him into stardom even though that may not have been the case. For example, he may have already bagged some shows and roles before the untamed but I am not going to portray it that way. For the sake of my future plots.
> 
> Lastly, Yibo's biking video when he competed the first time and had the issues -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYIsUBsa-p8&feature=youtu.be
> 
> And him talking about it on TTXS -  
> https://youtu.be/ISIqTGQ3QE0?list=PLUM8x224JrX_kJm3syb7Fz2zoNP6J-N0N&t=1500


	108. Get back up and fight

* * *

Yibo walked to the pit, cold and numb. The crew came out to him but neither knew what to say or do. He walked into the room quietly and sat down in one corner, helmet and all his gear still on.

He peeled off his gloves and didn't notice the team approaching him as he hung his head low, resting his elbows on his knees. He clung on to his gloves and took in deep breaths. The crew stayed back as they watched him trying to pull himself together.

But all of Yibo’s attempts were in vain. He broke down. He sobbed. His mind couldn't comprehend what had just transpired. He tried to keep it in but all his attempts were in vain. He sobbed into his helmet again for several seconds before finally, with a resolute inhale, regained his composure.

His flight wasn't until the next day because he had wanted to go over his performance from these two races and begin discussions for the August race. Additionally, he had many interviews to give the rest of the day which he was now dreading.

_I just want to go home. I just want to see Zhan-ge._

Yibo’s mind suddenly froze as he thought of Zhan.

_Did he see this? Did he watch me fail? How am I going to face him? What is he going to think of me? Don't be stupid Yibo. Zhan-ge won’t treat me with pity or shame. That’s just all in your head. But I failed. I failed so miserably. I had so many hopes and dreams. This was going to be the start of my second career. And now...it’s all gone._

Yibo shook the thoughts away so he could somehow get through the rest of the day. He took his helmet off and his coach sat beside him, encouraging him. He wiped his face and neck and ran his hand through his damp hair. He put on his cap and shades and with a long deep breath stood up, ready to face the crowd.

After watching the remaining race, facing the many cameras and fans, giving a few interviews and sitting down for a discussion with the whole team, a very tired and drained and sad Yibo walked back to his hotel room. He finally looked at his phone just as he was about to enter the elevator but paused when he saw a message from Zhan.

> _Zhan: I’m here, didi  
>   
>  _

Yibo’s eyes widened as he saw the name of a hotel and a room number in the next text. It was sent an hour back. 

_That means Zhan-ge flew here almost immediately after my race._

Yibo felt his eyes burn and he turned around immediately, jogging out to hail a cab. He wasn't sure he wanted to explain to his driver why he was headed to another hotel at 10:45 pm in the night.

The hotel was half an hour away and as soon as the cab stopped, Yibo hurried out and dashed into the hotel. He made his way to the top floor impatiently tapping his feet in the lift. Thankfully, it was late and there weren’t too many people around. 

He found the room at the end of the corridor and barely had he knocked that the door flung open. Zhan stood on the other side, smiling his soft calming smile and Yibo felt his heart finally begin to thaw a little.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispered in a low voice as he rushed forward into the waiting arms.

”I’m here, sweetie,” Zhan whispered as he rubbed Yibo’s back.

He walked in backwards with Yibo still in his arms and gently shut the door with his other hand. They stood there, wrapped up in each other, for several minutes. Zhan felt Yibo shaking. He could feel his neck and shoulders getting damp with Yibo’s tears. He could feel Yibo’s entire body trembling.

”It’s okay...let it all out,” Zhan whispered soothingly and swayed him gently from side to side.

Try as he did, Zhan couldn't keep his own tears in check. He let them flow silently as Yibo continued to weep against him. Eventually, Yibo turned his head and rested it against Zhan’s chest, hugging him tighter. Zhan wrapped both his arms around him and pulled him closer.

”I failed, ge...it felt horrible...and there was nothing I could do...”

”I saw didi...it wasn't your fault...it was out of your control…”

”This was my dream...I worked so hard for it…”

”You can still do this, didi...I believe in you...you’re going to come back stronger next time and beat the shit out of them.”

”I don't know anymore…”

”Wang Yibo,” Zhan pulled away just enough to look into Yibo’s eyes, “do you realize that even despite getting a late start you managed to nearly close the gap between you and the rest of them?”

Yibo just blinked and buried his face in Zhan’s chest.

”Even with the late start, if your bike hadn't shut down a second time, you had a solid chance of winning that race.”

”I felt humiliated and defeated when the bike stopped in the middle of the track...and everyone zoomed past me...I felt alone and left behind.”

”I’m sorry this happened, Bo-di,” Zhan whispered and kissed Yibo’s temple. “Take your time...cry...vent...do whatever you need. And then get back up and fight for your dream.”

They remained in each other’s embrace for several minutes until Yibo’s sobs turned into sniffles.

”Feeling better?”

”Mmm,” Yibo kept his face buried in Zhan’s chest.

”Are you hungry?”

Yibo shook his head.

”Have you eaten anything all day?”

Yibo didn't move and Zhan got his answer.

”I picked up some food for us on my way here…,” Zhan caressed Yibo’s cheek, coaxing him to look up.

”Thank you for coming, ge…”

”How could I not?”

”Don't you have something tomorrow morning?”

”I’m catching the early morning flight tomorrow...don’t worry.”

”I can't believe you came all the way to Zhuhai,” Yibo finally looked up.

”What kind of a boyfriend would I be if I let my puppy be alone when he’s so upset?” Zhan grinned at the puppy-eyed Yibo.

Yibo stared into Zhan’s smiling eyes for a few seconds and let a tear slide out his eyes.

”How did I get so lucky?” He whispered.

Zhan leaned forward and sealed their lips together. Yibo sighed and let Zhan in, deepening the kiss. Zhan placed one hand on Yibo’s cheek and the other on his lower back, pressing his body against him. He kissed him passionately, lovingly and deeply. He let all his care and love flow into the kiss and held Yibo tighter with every sigh.

”I missed you, ge,” Yibo spoke softly when Zhan pulled away.

”I missed you too, didi,” Zhan toyed with Yibo’s lips with a gentle smile. “Let me show you how much?”


	109. I want to be that person for you

* * *

“Let me show you how much?” Zhan brushed a strand of Yibo’s hair away from his eyes.

Yibo sniffled and nodded slowly, wrapping his arms around Zhan’s neck. Zhan kissed Yibo’s arm from his wrist to his shoulder. He pulled Yibo’s shirt down by the collar and kissed across his collarbone, making his way to his other arm, placing light kisses all the way to his wrist.

Yibo closed his eyes, feeling every kiss with increased sensitivity. He could feel all the love Zhan was pouring into every touch. He opened his eyes when Zhan took his hands in his and walked them to the bed. They stood by the bedside as Zhan showered Yibo’s face, lips, neck, shoulders, arms with more kisses while taking off his clothes one by one. 

Zhan smiled when Yibo tugged at his shirt and took it off as well along with everything else. They stood there, naked and silent, gazing into each other’s eyes.

”I love you, Wang Yibo,” Zhan took Yibo’s face in his and kissed his forehead.

”I love you too, Zhan-ge,” Yibo leaned into the kiss.

They got into bed and lay beside each other, legs entangled and arms around each other. Zhan memorized the look on Yibo’s face. He had never seen him look so defeated, vulnerable and most of all young. He looked his age suddenly. Zhan was reminded that Yibo was barely 22. Yet, he had seen way more than Zhan ever had at that age. He had been through way more than Zhan had at that age. He had achieved so much more than Zhan had at that age.

He began kissing him again, this time with more fervor and passion as his mind thought of how young and innocent Yibo really was underneath all the layers of his professionalism and public persona. He felt an urge to hide and protect him and fight away all his fears and failures. 

He rolled on top of Yibo, and Yibo continued kissing him back like it was the only thing holding him together. He felt Zhan caress every inch of his body with his hands and moaned when he found his erection. Zhan stroked it tenderly at first but quickly matched it to the passion of his kiss. 

As their bodies writhed together on the bed, growing sweatier and hotter with every tussle, Zhan moaned into Yibo’s mouth as he began grinding down against Yibo. Yibo groaned as he felt how hard Zhan was and the pleasure went straight to his dick. Zhan pulled back for a second to grab the lube from his bag and when he applied some on his fingers, Yibo waited impatiently for him.

”Ge…I need you, ge,” Yibo whined.

Zhan could see his tear stained cheeks under the lamp light and it made his heart ache. He rushed forward and planted both arms beside him protectively as if shielding him from the world. He kissed him vigorously and then lowered one hand to open him up. Yibo’s entire body relaxed into the bed and his head fell to one side as he sighed with pleasure.

Zhan scissored him open and massaged him, careful to hit his spot every single time. This time, Yibo’s reaction was different. This time, Yibo didn't moan erotically or thrash his body around. This time, Yibo sighed happily as if he was being cradled and cuddled. This time, Yibo’s body turned to putty as he pulled Zhan close for a hug, spreading his legs wider and relaxing into every thrust.

By the time Yibo was prepared, Zhan could see a smile on his face as he enjoyed every touch that Zhan showered on him. Seeing the relaxed joy on his face, Zhan peppered his entire body with kisses as he aligned himself and entered Yibo.

He watched his face with a smile and maneuvered himself in and out based on the expression on Yibo’s face. Tonight his goal was not to get Yibo to scream or himself to drown in mania. Tonight, his goal was to give Yibo the pleasure of being touched, to see Yibo smile wider with every sensation, to see Yibo sigh happily as he felt them connect and come closer.

Zhan rocked into Yibo at a steady pace while his lips enveloped the soft, pink, plush lips that were his and only his to kiss. He increased his pace when he felt Yibo’s hands pulling him closer. He thrust in harder when he felt Yibo’s smile diminish as his mind probably went back to the day’s events.

”Shhh,” Zhan would whisper to bring him back every time, “it’s okay...I’m here.”

Yibo buried his face in the crook of Zhan’s neck and Zhan moved into him faster with each breath. At one point, Yibo threw his head back as Zhan thrust into him deeper and deeper.

”Ahh...ge,” Yibo moaned and smiled breathlessly, “that feels so good…”

Zhan maintained the angle and rammed all the way in again, causing Yibo to breathe shakily as he clutched the pillow beneath his head.

”You make me feel so good, ge...ahhh...so good…”

”Always, sweetie...always here...for you…,” Zhan murmured even as he felt himself reaching the edge.

He grabbed on to Yibo’s erection and began stroking it long and hard. Yibo bit his lips at the dual pleasure and spread his legs wider to give Zhan more access. Zhan rammed into Yibo five more times, his hands keeping up the pace as well, and soon they both climaxed together, their breaths hitching and bodies shivering.

After several seconds, both the bodies fell limp. Zhan rolled to one side and pulled out of Yibo. He felt Yibo follow him and throw his arm around Zhan’s chest, keeping him close. When he glanced down, Yibo was looking up at him with a smile on his face.

”Thank you,” Yibo muttered softly.

”You never have to thank me,” Zhan turned onto his side and leaned in, rubbing his nose against Yibo’s. “Wang Yibo...do you realize how much I respect you? How much I am in awe of you?”

Yibo blushed and shook his head.

”Well, a lot. So much that I can't even begin to tell you how much you inspire me. The things you do, the decisions you take, the path you create for yourself….it’s inspiring. Even when it’s hard or uncommon or controversial, you keep moving ahead once you’ve set your mind on something.”

Yibo smiled and shifted closer to Zhan.

”I’m just the lucky one who somehow gets to be close to you to see how much work you put in. And I know you won't stop now. My Yibo never gives up. Especially when things get tough. Right?”

Yibo bit his lips and paused for a moment. But seeing the determined look on Zhan’s face, his eyes lit up and he nodded.

”This was a minor setback. Your racing career is just getting started. And I’m right here for whenever you need me. In whatever way you need me. I’m here to make sure you stay grounded when you feel like you’re flying too high, to make sure there is wind beneath your wings when you can't find it in yourself to take flight, to make sure you have someone’s arms to rush into when things don't go as planned, to make sure you know there’s at least always one person cheering you on wherever you are.”

”Really?” Yibo’s entire body lit up and he felt like he was floating the clouds.

”I want to be that person for you...I _am_ that person for you,” Zhan nodded firmly.

”Yes, you are,” Yibo smiled and kissed Zhan before he could say anything else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm somehow never satisfied with my smut and feel like it's my weak point in the story. Anyway, hopefully I'll get better as I begin to explore Zhan's "list" ;)
> 
> Also, for the people over here and on twitter who have requested angst...I have two things to say to you - wait for the story to reach Sep/Oct in the timeline and be careful what you ask for. I've already written those chapters. 😏


	110. Xiao Zhan had a secret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Announcement!!
> 
> I'm writing the next few chapters to the best of my abilities because I just found out yesterday that one of the readers is in the hospital, reading my story ||_||
> 
> I promise I am going to try harder to write better for you!

* * *

To Zhan, the month of May felt like the calm before the storm. The days went by in a blur of the usual activities and Yibo’s usual busy schedule. Pretty soon, it was time for the wheels of the Untamed train to warm up. They had a Bazaar photoshoot coming up which would kickstart the promotions for the show that would air at the end of June.

They would be on the cover of the June 2019 digital issue of Harper’s Bazaar China to let the world know that their show was coming soon. From there on, all their hard work and its results would be out in the open for the general public to love or hate, accept or reject, make or break.

With every passing day, Zhan could feel his stomach twist and turn into knots. This was his first show as a lead. This was his first big release. This was the first of his 2019 line up. If the Untamed didn't do well, if it was halted midway due to the censorship in their country, or if he wasn't accepted in his role, Zhan’s future in the industry would remain uncertain. 

His role in Joy of Life was a very minor one. He had taken it on before he was selected for the role of Wei Wuxian and, never one to break his promises, he had stayed on in the show. He didn't expect Joy of Life to do much for his career but he did have high hopes for Jade Dynasty. All of this, however, depended on how he was received in the Untamed. 

His anxiety wasn't helped by the fact that Yibo had not been around that whole week. He was traveling for work and was back in Beijing the day of the Bazaar shoot. But Zhan had a meeting at Wajijiwa when Yibo landed and so would only get to see him directly at the studio.

When Zhan reached the venue of the Bazaar photoshoot, Yibo was already there. He knew that because he had received at least a dozen messages from the boy who had arrived at the studio before Zhan and was probably sitting in hair and makeup. 

> _Bo-di: Ge!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Zhan-Ge!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Ge-Ge!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Xiao Zhan!  
>    
>  Zhan: Yes, Bo-di! Like I said two minutes ago, I’m still on my way!  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m alone and bored, ge!  
>    
>  Zhan: How can you be alone when there’s at least five hair and make-up people and twenty crew members around you?!  
>    
>  Zhan: AND you have a cell phone with games on it!  
>    
>  Bo-di: But I miss YOU, ge _☹️ _  
>   
>  _

Zhan’s heart melted. He held the phone to his chest and shook his head in amused resignation.

_This boy! How can I stay annoyed at him!? Even his constant nagging texts are adorable and full of love. It sucks that this is the first time I’m seeing him after so many days and it’s going to be amidst a whole set of crew people hovering around us!!_

__

What Zhan didn't know, when he finally arrived at the studio and walked into the dressing room, was that the hairstylist had just finished styling Yibo’s hair. Zhan stopped in his tracks when Yibo, still in shorts and a t-shirt, glanced up at Zhan’s reflection in the mirror and smiled. His eyes traveled from Yibo’s radiant smile up his face, past his eyes, and rested on his hair. 

__

Yibo looked good, just like he did in any and every piece of clothing, every hairstyle, and every makeup in every photoshoot. The thing was. Zhan had a secret. He had a thing for buzz cuts. And currently, he was staring, probably even leering, at his secret boyfriend, who was sitting in the middle of a team of artists and crew members, sporting a side buzz.

__

* * *

__

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo exclaimed when he saw Zhan’s reflection in the mirror he was seated in front of as the stylists worked their magic.

__

Zhan’s mouth was slightly parted, his lips looking soft and loose, giving Yibo a sudden jolt down under. It had been over a week since he had seen Zhan and when he had landed in Beijing, all he had wanted to do was see Zhan before heading over to the Bazaar shoot. But Zhan had been at Wajijiwa and Yibo had to resign himself to the fact that the first time he would see Zhan was in the crowded studio set. 

__

What Yibo didn't expect, however, was to see a very noticeably, to him at least, turned on Zhan. 

__

_Is Zhan-ge...staring at me strangely? Fuck...he looks so turned on right now. Can anyone else tell?_ Yibo glanced around quickly. _Is it because it’s been so long since we’ve seen each other? Zhan-ge usually has better self control than this? Fuck, I need to find some privacy...I want to kiss him so bad._

__

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo regained his composure and called out again, aiming for casual and friendly and not nervous and horny.

__

He sighed in relief when Zhan snapped out of whatever thoughts were keeping him rooted to his spot and hastily put on a smile on his face as he approached Yibo. 

__

* * *

__

Zhan gulped down the feelings Yibo’s hair had churned up in him. He forced his eyes to stay on Yibo’s eyes, his smile, his face; anywhere but his hair.

__

”Bo-di!” Zhan tried to put on a casual and friendly smile. 

__

He walked over and clasped his hand with Yibo’s before leaning sideways and wrapping an arm around him giving him a side hug. But that turned out to be a mistake. A big mistake.

__

When Yibo leaned into the side hug, Zhan felt the buzz cut brush against the skin on his upper arm, instantly leaving behind a trail of goosebumps. He pulled back immediately as if burned and startled Yibo who looked at him in confusion.

__

”Everything okay, ge? What happened?” Yibo narrowed his eyes on a flustered Zhan.

__

”Nothing,” Zhan attempted a nonchalant chuckle that ended up sounding more like a frog was stuck in his throat. 

__

”Ge?” Yibo frowned.

__

Zhan couldn't tell if it was just his imagination or if everyone in the dressing room had shifted their attention to him but he felt the weight of many eyes on him and found himself blurting out.

__

”Your hair!”

__

_Fuck, Zhan. Don't give yourself away. Play it cool. No one here can know you are turned on by Yibo because of his hair right now._

__

”My hair?” Yibo’s eyes widened a little.

__

_Fuck. Zhan-ge hates my hair. I knew I shouldn't have let them shave the sides off!!!_

__

”Yeah...it just…it tickles...I mean it itched...it itched my skin when I hugged you,” Zhan looked around at the team and rubbed his hand on his arm as if to prove the point.

__

_Good save, Zhan. Good save._ Zhan thought in relief.

__

”Oh, okay,” Yibo mumbled as another stylist took him away to get dressed in his costume.

__

_Yep._ Yibo frowned at himself. _He definitely hates my hair._

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Interview - 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EbQLZLDuB0k&t=2s  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ugjKkupDkfc
> 
> Photos - 
> 
> https://twitter.com/dramapotatoe/status/1143375707923288065  
> https://m.weibo.cn/status/4387039581617266?  
> https://aminoapps.com/c/founder/page/blog/wang-yibo-xiao-zhan-untamed-promo-bazaar-pics/nwYn_dgiLuMnzjBEErdaj11xgVLpkKX6pk  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rMVKVb4NWqw  
> https://gramho.com/explore-hashtag/er_%E2%9D%A4o%E2%9D%A4_HarpersBazaar
> 
> BTS - 
> 
> https://twitter.com/chiharuzushi/status/1146449312102195201  
> https://www.facebook.com/wangYiboXiaozhan/photos/a.2266121810171347/2375023352614525/?type=3&theater  
> https://scontent-lax3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/s960x960/69817200_2375023359281191_5060120890923024384_o.jpg?_nc_cat=109&_nc_sid=110474&_nc_ohc=xpej65tnhjwAX_alnGD&_nc_ht=scontent-lax3-1.xx&_nc_tp=7&oh=cf8b3e7f53af3ddaa7952cbf3d759655&oe=5E9759DA  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUc5W9hsbRs  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p47gXwK9v1I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2uvo6GcqADY  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vy2gMZHhQsg  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVzZ2Reup2g  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqo3ZkNaXBM


	111. What are you doing?

* * *

When Zhan got dressed in his costume - a loose black satin full sleeved top and matching loose satin pants - he stood up and looked at himself in the mirror. He was more than happy with the look, especially the short high ponytail that was slightly messy with bangs falling on his forehead.

Barely had he managed to completely push Yibo’s buzz cut out of his mind that in came Yibo fully dressed up in his own costume - a top that was similar to Zhan’s except that it was an off pearly white and revealed more of Yibo’s chest. But the bare chest wasn't what was occupying Zhan’s mind at the moment. Nor was it the hair. Well not all of it was just the buzz cut any more.

Zhan’s eyes trailed up and down as he took in the sight that stood before him - Yibo with side cuts and a high short ponytail with messy bangs. As a matter of fact, Yibo with side cuts and a high short ponytail with messy bangs in a _fucking skirt_.

Something about that whole image short-circuited Zhan’s brain, leaving it a useless pile of goop. Which is why when Yibo walked up to him, it took Zhan three _’Zhan-ge’s_ and a slap to the arm to return to earth with a yelp.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo grunted and slapped his arm again. “What are you doing?!”

”Huh? Ow...Bo-di!” Zhan hissed and rubbed his arm. “I...nothing...I was just…”

”Wait here, you two...stay in the AC...we’ll call you when the shot is ready,” the head stylist nodded at them and then left the dressing room.

Yibo did a quick room scan and, to his dismay, there were still three makeup artists in another corner of the room. Nonetheless, he leaned closer and whispered.

”Zhan-ge...what are you doing? You’ve been behaving weird ever since you got here.”

”Nothing, Bo-di,” Zhan cleared his throat and exhaled. “I’m fine...just distracted.”

”By what? My hair? You hate it, don't you?” Yibo couldn't help but pout sadly.

”Huh?!” Zhan exclaimed a little loudly. “Why would you think that?”

”You’ve been staring at it...and you got all weird about how it itches...you’re thinking about how it will...feel later, aren’t you?” Yibo looked dejected. “I’m sorry, ge,” he continued in a low voice. “They said it was necessary for the look. I didn't think it was such a big deal but clearly you…”

”That’s not it, didi!” Zhan shook his head and whispered back. “That’s not it at all. I like it...it...looks good…”

”Liar. If you liked it, you would have said so in the beginning.”

”Okay. Okay! Fine. I lied.”

”I knew it! But it won't feel that weird, ge...trust me...see, touch it,” Yibo grabbed Zhan’s hand and grazed the side of his head with it lightly. 

Zhan froze, his hand still placed on Yibo’s buzz. He looked at Yibo with darkening eyes.

“And if you still don't like it…”

”I said,” Zhan interrupted Yibo, “I lied...I don't _like_ it…”

Yibo paused when he noticed the way Zhan was looking at him. He froze as he recognized the look. It was the same gaze that he had seen for a brief second when Zhan entered the dressing room on his arrival. And here it was again. Desire. All over Zhan’s face.

”Ge?” Yibo’s lips quivered.

”Bo-di…”

”Ge…”

Before Zhan could say anything, they were called for and whisked away to the set for the photoshoot.

* * *

For the next three hours, Zhan and Yibo met and left each other’s eyes over and over again. Everytime Yibo saw Zhan staring at him, he could see the lust in his eyes. He knew Zhan was imagining all sorts of things in his head whenever he would look at Yibo but then smirk and look away. He did his best and schooled his expressions for as long as he could each time they had to hold each other’s gaze for the camera.

With every passing minute, he could see Zhan getting bolder with his smirks and the looks he threw his way. It got to a point where Yibo had to resume their old ways and smack Zhan to keep him under control and dissipate any sexual tension.

Like when Zhan, to Yibo’s utter horror, slid his foot up Yibo’s leg, lifting his skirt fabric with it. Yibo had frozen because never in a million years would he have expected such shamelessness from Zhan in a photoshoot.

”Venus,” Zhan grazed his calf and said in a voice barely above a whisper, as if he meant to think it instead of saying it out loud.

”What are you doing?” Yibo kept his tone casual in an attempt to normalize the situation.

”Just checking your gender,” Zhan replied just as casually.

Yibo felt his face heat up and thought he was about to choke so he did what he did best. He hit Zhan. And that seemed to calm the atmosphere for the time being.

But not for long. As they sat on the floor by the water, Yibo playing the zither and Zhan playing with the bunny, Zhan’s foot began its naughty shenanigans again. Yibo, who was sitting cross legged, felt a warmth nuzzle up against his leg under the table. He gulped and continued playing the zither with a poker face, willing himself to be the professional one. 

”What are you doing?” Yibo found himself mouthing when it got to a point where he felt like caving.

”Nothing,” Zhan shrugged and continued disrupting Yibo’s zither playing and toying with the rabbit, prompting Yibo to smack him with his sleeve yet again.

When the shoot was finally over, Yibo breathed a long sigh of relief. Those had been the hardest hours of his life. He had felt like a prey under the gaze of Zhan and all his energy had been spent in trying to maintain professionalism while keeping Zhan in control. They were rushed into the dressing room once more and in another thirty minutes, all their hair and makeup was off.

Once they had changed into their regular clothes, Yibo dumped his costume on top of a chair.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo began but paused when he noticed Zhan walking towards the discarded pile.

Yibo watched as Zhan sifted through the satin mess and pulled out Yibo’s pearly white skirt. Zhan maintained eye contact with Yibo as he held the fabric close to his face and took in a long inhale. Yibo felt his entire body shiver as Zhan gave him a satisfied smile before discreetly shoving the skirt into his bag. The shiver turned into a full bodied shudder when Zhan, ever so lightly, touched Yibo's buzz with the tip of his finger. Yibo exhaled sharply as Zhan headed out, smirking as he tilted his head over his shoulder before turning the corner.

”I’ll see you at home, Bo-di."


	112. You looked like a vision

* * *

When Yibo entered their apartment, the lights were dimmed down and he saw his skirt draped across the loveseat. He put his bag down and walked over to the couch. On the skirt, he noticed a note placed carefully with some words scribbled on it hurriedly.

_Wear this. And only this. Before coming to the balcony._

Yibo felt a shiver run down his spine as he imagined Zhan’s low voice purring those words into his ears. His neck twitched as he felt a phantom tickle as if Zhan’s lips had really breathed them against his ear.

_Balcony?_ Yibo bit his lip. _Wearing just this?_

The hesitation lasted only until Yibo heard the deep voice he had just been imagining and feeling weak thinking of.

”Didi?” The honey voice murmured in the distance. “Come here, sweetie…”

Hastily, Yibo dropped off all his clothes and slid the skirt up his legs. Swaying against his bare skin, the satin felt like flowing water. The softness swept against him as he walked slowly towards the balcony.

A sheer curtain swayed in the wind between where Yibo stood and where Zhan stood somewhere on the other side where it was pitch black with no moon in the sky. Yibo paused, staying in the warm dimness that glowed inside the apartment around him. As if sensing his hesitation, the voice beckoned again.

”It’s okay, sweetie,” the voice purred. “I’m here...just follow my voice...”

Yibo took a deep breath and stepped over the threshold, through the curtain, and into the balcony. He walked a few steps into the darkness and took in a sharp inhale when a pair of hands held him and guided him further in.

”Hey….” Zhan’s gentle voice whispered. 

”Hi…,” Yibo tried to smile but was interrupted by a pair of soft lips that slotted themselves against his.

The lips were gentle yet full of passion. Yibo sighed into the kiss as a tongue dove deep into him, exploring him, licking him, tasting him. He could smell and taste Zhan all around him. A few seconds later, they pulled apart and Yibo opened his eyes slowly.

When his eyes adjusted, he saw Zhan standing against the railing. His eyes travelled from his wet hair, which meant he had just come out of the shower, to his smiling face, to the glowing patch of his exposed chest. Whatever Zhan was wearing, blended into the night’s darkness.

It was only when he ran his hands up Zhan’s arms to his shoulder and then down his sides that he recognized the fabric. Zhan was wearing his loose black top from the Bazaar shoot. In fact, Zhan was _only_ wearing his loose black top from the Bazaar shoot.

”You looked like a vision when you walked through those curtains, lit from behind by the lamplight,” Zhan whispered as he glided one finger from Yibo’s lower lip, down his neck, onto his chest, over one nipple, down his abs, until they hooked on to the waistband of the skirt and used it to pull him closer.

”Is that...is that why you set this whole thing up like this?”

”Mmmm,” Zhan’s other hand cupped Yibo’s ass and pulled him even closer. “Got a good photo too,” Zhan tilted his head to the side and Yibo saw a camera sitting on one of the balcony chairs.

”How could I forget…,” Yibo grinned shyly, face mere inches from Zhan’s, “that Xiao-laoshi is a talented photographer as well.”

”That I am,” Zhan bared his teeth, “and I captured you perfectly too,” he groped Yibo’s ass harder so that he was grinding against Zhan.

With only the soft watery fabric between their hard erections, the frustrating lack of friction contrasted with the gentle lapping of the satin against their dicks, drew a gasp from both their lips. 

Zhan’s finger, still resting on Yibo's waist band, started making its way up Yibo’s body again. He paused to play with each of Yibo’s nipples, teasing and worrying them and then proceeding to lick them thoroughly. Yibo leaned his head back and began breathing heavily. His eyes closed as Zhan's tongue maneuvered its way around every nook and crevice of his chest and neck and shoulder.

”Ge…,” Yibo moaned as Zhan continued licking his way up his neck and then sucking on his throat. 

”All I could think about all. fucking. day.” Zhan bit the three words into Yibo’s skin, “when I saw you in this fucking skirt,” Zhan’s hands squeezed Yibo’s ass, “and that fucking side cut...," Zhan rubbed his lips against the texture of his buzz, "was to bend you over and…”

”...and?” Yibo swallowed and licked his lips as Zhan straightened them both and looked into his eyes.

Zhan held up a cloth piece and smirked at Yibo who immediately remembered the last time Zhan had blindfolded him. Yibo nodded slowly and held his breath as once again, he was engulfed in pitch black darkness.

”It’s okay,” Zhan’s soothing voice floated in his ears. 

He walked clumsily as Zhan guided him back into the apartment and eventually into their bedroom. Yibo smiled a little, partly in anticipation and partly because of how delicately Zhan was handling him. He sat on the bed and was guided up until he was sitting against the headboard.

Zhan sat on his lap, knees on either side, and ran his hands through Yibo’s hair again and again, slipping a little more to the side each time. Yibo thought he heard Zhan swallow when his fingers ran over the buzz.

”I love this look on you, didi,” Zhan continued whispering against Yibo’s lips and this time Yibo was sure he heard Zhan swallow hard. “You look so hot. Did something to my dick when we were at the shoot. Good thing my clothes were loose.”

”Old cow eating new grass,” Yibo whispered slowly and then smirked.

His smirk was wiped away but a step of lips crashing against his and devouring them whole.

”I’ll eat you real good,” Zhan growled.

Something stirred deep in Yibo’s core when he heard the sound Zhan made. He felt the same feeling as he did during the shoot. He felt like prey. Yibo let out a whimper as Zhan bit his lip mercilessly. The next moment, though, he felt something he had not been expecting. Another fabric rustled its way up his body, pausing only on his lips. 

Yibo’s breath hitched when he realized what was happening. The fabric tightened around his lips, covering them roughly, and Yibo felt a slight sting at the edges of his mouth.

”Mmm,” Zhan spoke soothingly as he tied the cloth around Yibo’s mouth, “that’s better...nod if you’re okay, sweetie,” Zhan caressed his chin.

Yibo nodded and stretched his hands out to reach for Zhan, only for both his wrists to be caught in the folds of yet another cloth that spun around them tightly. Zhan moved Yibo’s arms back over his head and knotted the cloth against the top of the headboard, securing Yibo in place.

”I’m right here, sweetie” Zhan’s voice spoke in a soft and firm tone, “Do you feel safe?”

Yibo nodded gently, a slow smile spreading across his face. Zhan grinned and placed a wet kiss over the fabric on Yibo’s mouth. Yibo’s body leaned forward for more but Zhan pushed him back against the headboard and moved away.

”My good boy,” Zhan murmured as he placed kisses down Yibo’s chest.

“You were so good at the shoot today...a little too good,” he bit down on Yibo’s naval prompting Yibo’s face to fall to one side.

”The whole time we were shooting...I thought of you...like this,” Zhan sunk his teeth into Yibo’s pulse.

"Hands tied together over your shaved head so you can't move unless I let you. Eyes covered so you can't see any of the things I am going to do to you. Mouth bound shut so you can't scream until I want you to. Your bare body shivering under my touch and just this fucking skirt between you and me."

Yibo felt his dick reach full erection as Zhan continued whispering.

”I wanted to have my own little photoshoot with you...and then have my way with you...you want that too, right sweetie?” Zhan ended the question in a sickeningly sweet tone.

Yibo nodded eagerly, his sound muffled by the cloth.

”Good boy,” Zhan sat up and Yibo heard the click of a camera.


	113. Click

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you do when you think your smut writing skills are inadequate? You take on the challenge of writing something sexier than anything you've ever written before of course! Either this turns out to be real good or real bad. But in either case, forgive me lord for I have sinned.

* * *

_Click._

Yibo’s heart thumped out of his chest in an attempt to see what he looked like to Zhan right now.

_Click._

Yibo felt Zhan shuffle closer and angle his chin oh so gently with his finger.

_Click._

Yibo heard rustling and then felt a sudden cool sensation sprayed onto his chest.

_Click._

There was stillness and silence for several seconds and Yibo’s tongue darted out to lick his lips but was met with a satiny dampness that clamped it in.

As his ears strained to find Zhan, he was caught off guard when a sudden warmth attacked the spot on his skin where the coolness had surprised him just seconds ago. Yibo moaned as the warmth spread like a slick and he squirmed as he felt Zhan’s tongue lick away at his skin.

”Mmmm...mmpfllkk,” Yibo groaned into the cloth as Zhan licked and nipped at his chest.

He stopped when he felt the cloth get pulled down his mouth and rest on his chin instead. Wet lips attacked his and Yibo’s tongue darted out to greet them desperately, licking at whatever he could latch on to.

”Keep your tongue out for me, sweetie,” Zhan purred.

Without hesitation, Yibo stuck his tongue out and let it hang mid air. He was rewarded by something being sprayed onto his tongue. Something soft, cool, light. 

”Taste it,” Zhan hummed.

When Yibo did as he was told he hummed along as he tasted the freshly whipped cream.

”Like it?”

”Ye...yes,” Yibo found his voice.

The cloth went back on his mouth and Yibo felt Zhan shuffle down and in the next second, his skirt was being pulled off him. Zhan ran his hands greedily all over Yibo’s naked body, groping and squeezing along the way. Yibo squirmed when he felt more whipped cream being squirted onto his body - his thighs, his belly button, his nipples, his dick.

_Click._

Yibo gulped and moaned and squirmed some more as Zhan attacked him with his lips and tongue and teeth. One by one, each spot was licked clean by Zhan. Carefully and meticulously Zhan sucked Yibo clean. His dick was licked fresh, his balls were wrung dry. Yibo muffled into the cloth as Zhan teased and toyed with his erection.

Once again, Yibo felt the cloth around his mouth being pulled down. He felt Zhan come closer, knees on either side of his body. Yibo arched his back against the headboard to lean closer to the warmth of Zhan’s naked body.

”You’re so tasty, didi,” Zhan held Yibo’s chin. “You made the whipped cream taste better,” Zhan swiped at Yibo’s lower lip with his thumb.

Yibo couldn't help but blush a little at Zhan’s rough voice. He wanted to see the look on Zhan’s face. If the wrecked voice was anything to go by, Yibo knew Zhan was probably looking ravishing as he always did when aroused.

”Do you want to taste more of the whipped cream too, didi?” Zhan asked slowly as his tongue licked over the redness at the edge of Yibo’s mouth.

”Yes, Zhan-ge….,” Yibo replied breathlessly.

Yibo heard the whipped cream being sprayed onto something close to him and tried to use his nose to ascertain its distance from him.

”Open wide, didi,” Yibo could hear the smirk in Zhan’s voice.

Yibo opened his mouth and felt the sweet smell come closer. His tongue darted out to get a taste of the whipped cream and as he managed to get a tiny lick of the dessert, he heard Zhan groan helplessly.

”Open wider, Bo-di,” Zhan spoke in a breathless yet firm tone.

Yibo’s heart raced as he opened his mouth wide and readied his throat. 

_Click._

Before Yibo could comprehend the implication of that sound, he felt something enter his mouth slowly. He could taste the sweetness of the whipped cream but he could also taste something else, familiar and more delicious. He could taste Zhan. 

Hungry and excited now, he opened his mouth wider and sucked his lips tightly around Zhan, adjusting himself so that he could take more of Zhan in his mouth. He felt Zhan’s entire body lurch as loud moans left Zhan’s mouth, fast and hard.

When Yibo had taken all of Zhan in, they stilled for a moment. Yibo to catch his breath and Zhan to.

_Click._

”I’m going to fuck your mouth, didi,” Zhan’s voice was quivering with barely contained impatience.

Yibo nodded as much as their position allowed him. He felt Zhan lean in closer and stand up on knees a little higher until he was angled just right in Yibo’s mouth. He felt Zhan grip the headboard where his hands were tied and scrambled to lace his fingers with them. Zhan obliged. He placed kisses all along Yibo’s wrist and hands before entwining their fingers together. 

And then the pounding began. Without any further delay, Zhan thrust his hips back and forwards again and again and again and again. He fucked into Yibo’s mouth with his long hard erection. Yibo moaned and groaned, in ways he knew Zhan loved, to spur him on. 

_Click._

_Click._

_Click._

”Fuck, didi,” Zhan growled as he rammed into him, “you’re so good...so good for me...you take me in so good,” Zhan panted.

”My good...sweet...boyfriend...you’d do anything for me…”

”Mmmmm,” Yibo managed to moan. 

”Ahhh...didi...Bo-di...fuck…,” Zhan’s voice became raspier and Yibo could feel him reach the brink of pleasure.

The next moment both groaned out loud as Zhan came in fast and furious spurts into Yibo’s mouth. Zhan growled as his entire body fell forward pressing further into Yibo. Yibo felt himself begin to choke but then was almost immediately relieved from his discomfort. Zhan pulled out of his mouth and Yibo swallowed his cum down along with taking in some long deep breaths.

”Sweetie...are you okay?” Zhan sat on his lap in front of him and asked, his voice full of concern.

”Yeah...yeah, ge,” Yibo nodded and managed a smile while still licking Zhan’s cum that was dripping down his chin. “Fuck, ge...fuck...that was…”

Zhan rushed forward and enveloped Yibo’s lips. He grabbed the back of Yibo’s neck with one hand and wrapped the other hand around Yibo’s bound wrists. He angled Yibo’s face and kissed him senseless. Yibo moaned as Zhan grind down on his erection and on hearing him, Zhan pulled back and the next thing Yibo knew, his blindfold was off. 

He blinked and began looking around but before he could take in the scene, Zhan slid down his body placing kisses along the way. Yibo’s breath hitched as his over sensitive body shuddered under the touches. He was already close to coming thanks to the things Zhan had been using his body for. All he needed was a gentle push to go over the edge. 

Yibo looked down and saw Zhan’s hungry mouth hovering over his dick. He bit his lip and struggled with his wrist binds as Zhan smirked at him, sticking his tongue out dangerously close to the head but not quite touching yet.

”Ge…,” Yibo begged.

_Click._

”Fuck…”

”You look so good when you’re horny and desperate and helpless, didi…”

”Fuck ge...I’m almost…”

_Click._

”I can't wait to show you the photos of you bound up with my dick in your mouth…”

”Fuck…,” Yibo’s entire body trembled and he felt his dick twitch and harden even more as if some invisible hand was pumping it.

_Click._

”Wang Yibo,” Zhan’s gentle voice commanded his attention. 

Yibo watched as Zhan lowered his tongue onto his dick and ever so slowly, lapped at the leaking slit.

_Click._

”Come for me, Wang Yibo.” Zhan smirked and lay one last lick along the underside of Yibo’s dick.

With a long moan, Yibo’s entire body spasmed and he came right on Zhan’s mouth and all over Zhan’s face. He watched as Zhan turned the camera finally on himself.

_Click._


	114. Because you were on the other side

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well that's the end of THAT :P 
> 
> Loved all the comments! XD

* * *

Zhan put the camera aside and wiped his face against the bedsheet. He leaned forward and licked Yibo’s dick and stomach until they were clean of all cum. He glanced up and saw Yibo, still tied to the bed, leaning against the headboard with his eyes open and a satisfied smile on his sweaty face.

Zhan crawled up the bed and sat on his lap once more. He quickly undid the cloth and took the delicate red wrists in his hands. He placed kisses all over them lovingly for several seconds. 

”Ge…”

Zhan looked up and saw a tired but smiling Yibo gazing at him. He placed one last set of kisses on the bruised wrists and then turned his attention to Yibo’s mouth. He planted soft kisses at the corners of his mouth where the fabric had chafed a bit.

Yibo tilted his head to the side to intervene Zhan’s lips and took them in his. They sat together, arms around each other, kissing lazily and tenderly, smiling and rubbing noses, licking and nibbling, giggling and sighing.

”So how many items does this check off your list?” Yibo let out a long sigh and rested his head against Zhan’s chest

”Three,” Zhan kissed his temple and chuckled. “Tying you up...eating things off you...and fucking your mouth.”

”And the photography?”

”That’s just a bonus...you’re so fucking beautiful...had to capture it.”

”So this was what was going on in your head during the photoshoot with Bazaar? You dirty old man,” Yibo grinned.

”Is it my fault that my boyfriend is so fucking hot?”

Yibo blushed and wrapped his arms tighter around Zhan, nuzzling his face into the crook of Zhan’s neck.

”I love you, Bo-di,” Zhan smiled.

”Mmm...love you too,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s collarbone.

”Are you feeling okay? Do your wrists and mouth hurt?” 

”A little,” Yibo shrugged but added hastily when Zhan pulled away and tilted his face up, “...but...it doesn’t matter...nothing permanent...and it was all totally fucking worth it.”

Zhan frowned a little and caressed the corners of Yibo’s mouth that were tinted red because of the friction. He showered the area with more kisses prompting Yibo to giggle and squirm.

”Ge! I said it’s not that bad...”

Zhan proceeded to lay Yibo down on the bed and kiss every inch of his face playfully while his fingers caressed his bruised wrists.

”Ge!” Yibo giggled harder as Zhan kissed his nose several times.

Finally, Zhan sat up and stared at the smiling Yibo who stretched underneath him like a satisfied kitten.

”Fuck, Bo-di,” Zhan shook his head and rolled off Yibo and laid down beside him. “That was everything I wanted and more!”

He reached for the camera once again and turned it on them. He pulled Yibo close and kissed him on the lips and Yibo smiled into the kiss when he heard the clicks. Their bodies continued intertwining with each other and their kiss kept deepening, even as the clicks subsided.

* * *

”Bo-di?”

”Hmm?”

Zhan propped his head up on his arm and turned to face a fresh faced Yibo. Both had showered and cleaned up since their sexscapade and were now tucked into bed, cozy and snug. Zhan ran his hand through Yibo’s hair.

”You’re scared of the dark…”

”Is that a question?” Yibo smiled as he raised an eyebrow. “You know I am.”

”Then why did you do it?”

”Why did I do what?”

”Walk into the dark balcony…”

”Earlier tonight?”

”Yeah,” Zhan brushed some damp strands away from Yibo’s eyes. 

”Because you were on the other side,” Yibo shrugged.

Something inside Zhan stilled and then became heavy, like a heartache. It was the same feeling he would get occasionally when it would sink in that he loved Wang Yibo more today than the day before, if that was even possible. It was the same feeling that would overcome him when he would realize that he could no longer imagine a life without Yibo. It was the same feeling that would surprise him when he would accidentally let his mind wander into the what if’s of the future.

Noticing the lack of response and sudden distance in his eyes, Yibo propped his head up on his arm as well.

”Ge?”

”Bo-di…,” Zhan whispered and shook his head.

Yibo watched in alarm as tears slid out of Zhan’s eyes.

”Ge! What happened?”

”Why do you trust me so much?”

”Because…,” Yibo reached over and wiped Zhan’s tears. “I love you, ge.”

”What if...what if I screw up? What if…”

”Hey,” Yibo sat up and pulled Zhan up to a seated position. “Where’s all this coming from?”

”Nowhere...it’s just...I’m not perfect, Bo-di...I can fuck up too you know...what if I accidentally break your trust somehow and…”

”You won't,” Yibo sounded firm and confident, “I know you won't.”

”But what if I do something to hurt you unknowingly...what if you follow me into the dark only to realize you don't want to be in the dark any more…”

”Hey,” Yibo cupped Zhan’s cheeks and continued wiping the new stream of tears, “I know you’re not perfect...neither am I...but we...us...we’re going to make it...being with you in the dark is not scary...at all. And it’s not because I’m not scared of the dark any more or because I trust you to take care of me in the dark…”

”Then...what is it?”

”It’s because I’ve begun to trust myself more…,” Yibo spoke eagerly as if desperate to make Zhan understand, “...your love is making me stronger…I trust myself more...” 

”Bo-di,” Zhan held Yibo’s gaze. “You make me stronger too.”

”Don't ever think that way again,” Yibo frowned and pinched Zhan’s nose, “there’s nothing you can do that’ll break us. You’re a good person. And you’re the best boyfriend. And whatever happens, as long as we’re together, we’ll figure it out...okay?”

”Hmm,” Zhan grinned sheepishly and sniffled. “As long as we’re together...we’ll figure it out.”

”Good…,” Yibo smiled and leaned forward to connect their lips. “Now let’s get some sleep, sweetheart…”

”Okay,” Zhan nodded as they slid down and slotted into place against each other like the perfect puzzle pieces.

”Goodnight, ge.”

”I love you, Wang Yibo…”

”I love you more…”

”Not possible,” Zhan whispered before drifting off.


	115. The god of fortune

* * *

It was the end of May and Zhan and Yibo had been apart for two weeks. Zhan had more time on his hands than usual and even as he missed his boyfriend a great deal, he made himself feel better by reminding himself that the Untamed pre-release celebration was around the corner. And the promotions would begin and he would have a legit excuse to be around Yibo all the time.

As Zhan sat in his balcony, his thoughts were interrupted by his phone pinging.

> _Bo-di: Ge...did you see the news?  
>    
>  Zhan: What news?  
>    
>  _

Before Zhan could type anything else, his phone screen lit up with a video call.

”Ge,” Yibo’s face was serious and it made Zhan’s heart race. “Open your laptop and look up Taiwan.”

”Umm...okay,” Zhan stood up slowly and went inside to find his laptop.

He was aware of Yibo’s intense gaze fixed on him as he opened his laptop and looked up Taiwan. Immediately, a flurry of news articles flooded his screen, all with the same headlines.

_Taiwan Legalizes Same-Sex Marriage._

Before Zhan’s mind had even processed the words, it seemed like his heart had already done so. Because in the next moment, a tear slid down his cheek as he read and reread the headline.

His mind caught up a few seconds later and a dam burst within him. Up until then, he didn't realize just how much he had wanted to read something like this until he had. He hadn't realized just how much he had wanted to be allowed to do this until he had seen this. He shouldn't have been surprised but yet he was at how his heart soared as he saw images of the hordes and hordes of LGBTQ+ supporters who rallied and cheered and fought for these rights.

”Ge?”

Zhan was too lost within his mind to hear Yibo.

”Sweetheart?” Yibo repeated softly.

Zhan snapped out of his thoughts and looked up at an equally shiny-eyed Yibo.

”They did it,” was all Zhan could come up with.

”They did,” Yibo smiled at Zhan’s lost face lovingly.

”Do you think...we could...here...one day…”

”I don't care...all I care is…,” Yibo paused hesitantly.

”All you care is what?”

”Want to visit Taiwan anytime soon?” Yibo grinned.

Zhan wanted to scream at Yibo for his bratty behaviour but all he could do was smile and chuckle as more tears gushed down his cheeks. He surprised himself and Yibo when he spoke his next words.

”Sure, how about October 2020 on our second anniversary?”

Yibo froze and stared at his screen. Zhan froze and stared at his screen.

Neither spoke.

”Did you…,” Yibo’s brain was the first to reboot back to life. “Did you just...ask me to marry you?”

”Uhhh…,” Zhan’s brain clearly was still malfunctioning.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo’s voice grew excited and his eyes widened as he got closer to his phone.

”Uhhhhh…..”

”ZHAN-GE!!” Yibo screamed into his phone and that did it.

Zhan snapped out of his cardiac arrest and blinked back to life.

”I...no...I was...I just meant...we can visit Taiwan...you know...on a trip…”

”Zhan-ge? Did you actually just propose to me over video!?” Yibo’s eyes remained high and wide even as a slight grin appeared on his face.

”NO!!!”

”So you don't want to marry me!?”

”I DO!” Zhan exclaimed but then froze again. “Wait...I mean…”

”Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Are we really doing this over the phone!?” Yibo jumped around his hotel room and ran a hand down his face.

”Yibo?! What do you mean? I just…”

”I can't believe you said that over the phone...fuck, Zhan-ge! I was just...I wanted to…I wanted to be the one to say it first!!!!” Yibo finally screeched and fell back on his bed.

”Bo-di?” Zhan looked at his screen with a frown as the phone fell onto Yibo’s bed. “I can't see you, didi.”

Zhan could hear Yibo grunt and pick up the phone, adjusting it till he was in view once more.

”Okay, what just happened?” Zhan cleared his throat and sat up. 

”I want to marry you, ge. You were the first thing that popped into my head when I saw this.”

”Yibo...I…”

”You said you wanted it too!”

”I spoke without thinking, I just...it was the…”

”The first thing that popped into your head too?” Yibo grinned.

Zhan couldn't deny it. It had been the first image his mind had conjured on seeing the headline.

”Yes,” Zhan said meekly.

”Then let’s get married in October 2020,” Yibo smiled wide and pouted his lips to throw a kiss at his phone.

”Is this a joke?” Zhan looked incredulously at how casually Yibo was behaving.

”Well I had a whole proposal planned after reading this and I didn't expect you to say what you did...indirectly proposing to me over the phone of all things...but hey...I’ll take it.”

”What the fuck…”

"I love you, ge!"

"Bo-di...this is ridiculous..."

I LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH!"

BO-DI...we are NOT discussing our future weddin..."

"I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU MY HUSBAND, XIAO ZHAN!" Yibo screamed at the top of his lungs, a wide beaming ecstatic smile on his face.

"BO-DI!! Shhhhhh," Zhan hissed and looked at him in panic. "Someone will hear you..."

"Okay, okay," Yibo calmed down and bit his lips. "But I am...you're mine Zhan-ge...and I'm gonna lock you down in October 2020!"

"Yibo," Zhan's heart raced at his words and he felt himself at the edge of giving up all restraint too.

"Say it, ge," Yibo's gaze turned intense. "Please..."

"Bo-di," Zhan's smile grew wider even as his entire body trembled.

"Say it," Yibo looked at him, hopeful and breathless.

"I'm gonna marry you in 2020...and make you my husband," Zhan blushed hard.

But on seeing Yibo's blinding smile, his heart finally burst into confetti.

"I'M GONNA MARRY YOU, WANG YIBO!!!" Zhan yelled outloud, jumping up and down. "YOU'RE GOING TO BE MINE FOR LIFE!"

Both stared at each other through their phones with dopey grins and loving eyes. Neither spoke another word until suddenly, Yibo sighed and blew a puff of air to swipe his bangs away from his eyes.

”My manager texted me...gotta go, ge…duty calls! Bye! Love you! See you soon! LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH.”

Zhan blinked twice as the video turned off and he was left staring at his phone wallpaper with the god of fortune smirking back at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just needed to a self indulgent feel-good short chapter on the Taiwan epicness that happened at the time. The over the top energy in this chapter and all caps dialogs just reflect my enthusiasm for the momentous ruling! Haha!
> 
> https://www.cnn.com/2019/05/17/asia/taiwan-same-sex-marriage-intl/index.html  
> https://www.npr.org/2019/05/17/724222598/taiwans-parliament-legalizes-same-sex-marriage-a-first-in-asia  
> https://www.wikiwand.com/en/Same-sex_marriage_in_Taiwan
> 
> Also, this puts us in May 17, 2019 timeline wise!


	116. You two acted better in the drama

* * *

Zhan paced their apartment nervously. 

_This is stupid._ Zhan groaned. _We’ve made promises before. Why does this one feel different. What the hell was I thinking!? This is all too fast. This is so crazy. But we’re not doing anything immediately. Ughhhhh!!!!_

Just then, the door opened and Zhan heard things being thrown and hurried footsteps making their way to the bedroom, halting his pacing. Zhan turned around when Yibo enter the room and just as he opened his mouth, about to say something to greet his boyfriend, he felt excited arms wrap themselves around him even as the body kept walking forward. The next thing he knew, Zhan was falling onto the bed with a very hyper Yibo on top of him.

”Hey!” Yibo exclaimed after Zhan landed on the bed, dazed and confused.

”Hey yourself,” Zhan’s eyes widened. “Are you trying to kill me?”

Yibo grinned and crashed his mouth against Zhan and locked their lips together. All of Zhan’s previous uncertainty was washed away by Yibo’s wet, hungry lips. Try as he did, he couldn't help but let the kiss deepen. Their hands roamed through each other’s hair. Their moans blended into each other. Neither wanted to leave the kiss but eventually had to surface for air.

”Hi, future husband,” Yibo grinned wider, licking his lips.

”Yibo!” Zhan looked away, blushing and flustered. “Stop it!”

”Stop what, Zhan-ge? Call you my future _husband_?!” Yibo bent forward and placed kisses along Zhan’s jawline.

”Yes!” Zhan pushed Yibo off and sat up. “It’s...it’s embarrassing.”

”You’re so cute when you blush,” Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan from behind. “Fine fine, I’ll spare you...future hubby! Okay, that was the last time,” Yibo held onto Zhan tighter when he tried squirming away.

”I missed you,” Zhan shook his head and placed a kiss on Yibo’s arm.

”I missed you too.”

”You must be tired from the flight.”

”Nope...I’m far from tired...haven't felt tired ever since we decided to…,” Yibo paused when he saw Zhan’s face flush again. “...anyway, we have the party tonight too!”

”Oh yeah...the Untamed pre-release celebration...I can't wait to see everyone! It’ll be fun! Do you think we can go together...in the same car?”

Yibo let go of Zhan and moved to sit beside him on the bed.

”I really want to, ge...but you know how crazy it gets when I go...out.”

Zhan nodded and held Yibo’s hand. He knew how popular Yibo was because of his idol career prior to his acting and anchoring debut. It was one of the things Zhan had started to wrap his head around since their shooting. There would always be a crazy amount of fans loitering near their studios and shoot locations.

”It’s only going to get crazier now that we’re going to be doing a shit ton of interviews to promote the show,” Yibo looked at Zhan apologetically.

”No worries, didi,” Zhan placed a kiss on his cheek. “I understand. It’s going to be okay. We can just go separately.”

”So...you’re not mad?”

”Of course not! Your career is important...you should put it first.”

”You’re always first, ge...this is just...this is just something I have to do.”

”Hey,” Zhan smiled and pulled Yibo’s cheeks. “I know. And just like you said...as long as we’re together, we’ll figure the rest of it out!”

* * *

”Ah, Zhan-Zhan!” A loud voice called out to Zhan as soon as he entered the party room.

Zhan turned around to see his director walking towards him, waving his hand.

”Zheng-laoshi!” Zhan smiled and bowed, only to be pulled into a warm hug.

”Where’s Yibo?”

”Oh...I...he must be on his way I guess,” Zhan spoke as casually as possible.

”Uhuh,” the director smiled and nodded at Zhan knowingly.

Zhan rubbed the back of his neck as he began getting the sense that the director was probably already onto him.

_Maybe Yibo was right. Has he always known?_

”Ah! Yibo! You made it!” Zhan turned around at the director’s words and saw Yibo walk in.

”Hello, laoshi,” Yibo bowed and then turned to Zhan. “Hi, Zhan-ge,” he stretched his hands out.

Zhan grinned and clasped his hands and bumped his shoulder against Yibo’s.

”Thank god you two acted better in the drama,” the director rolled his eyes and smirked at them.

”Laoshi!?” Both Yibo and Zhan exclaimed in astonishment.

”Come on, you two,” he chuckled and led them to the rest of the cast.

”Zhan-ge!” Yubin rushed forward and gave Zhan an enthusiastic high five.

Yibo gave him a warning glare and Yubin bit his lips nervously.

”Oh, calm down,” Xuan Lu giggled softly and walked over towards them. “No one is coming close to your Zhan-ge,” she whispered to Yibo as she gave him a side hug.

”Shijie!” Zhan beamed and pulled her in for a quick hug.

”Xian-Xian!” Xuan Lu sighed and placed a hand on his cheek.

”Can you believe it?” Zhoucheng joined the group. “In a few weeks, the show will be out!!”

”My nerves grow more nervous every day,” Yubin rubbed his hands together.

”This is going to be great,” Haikuan smiled as he patted Zhoucheng’s back.

Zhan and Yibo stole a glance as ZanJin joined them and stood beside Haikuan, smiling coyly.

As the group stood together, chatting merrily, Zhan felt himself itching to hold Yibo’s hand. All their close friends knew. The only thing holding them back was the public venue. He sighed and almost felt dejected when he felt Yibo brush against him casually with a grin as he made room for some more cast members to join their circle.

”Let’s take some photos!” Xuan Lu suddenly exclaimed as they heard music begin playing in the background. “Looks like the celebration is about to begin.”

The group closed in together and Yibo felt Zhan come closer than was probably necessary.

”Come on, closer everyone,” Xuan Lu winked at Zhan.

Yibo nearly blushed when Zhan placed his hand on his shoulder.

_I need to get better at schooling my face if we’re going to get through the next few months of promotions!_

Zhan gave Yibo’s shoulder a soft squeeze before letting go once they had taken several selfies.

The evening proceeded with fun and laughter. The entire cast and crew was elated to be seeing each other again and had much to catch up on. Throughout the party, Zhan and Yibo never left each other’s sight. Even when they mingled in different circles, their eyes found each other every now and then.

”You two are going to have to figure this out before promos begin,” Haikuan spoke when it was just Yibo and him getting another drink.

”That bad?” Yibo grinned and rubbed the back of his neck.

Haikuan smiled and shook his head.

”So what’s up with you? Any...updates on your little...thing?” Yibo smirked.

”Huh?” Haikuan’s face faltered. “What thing?”

”Okay...I’m just going to take a shot in the dark here, but is there something between you and Zan Jin?”

”Whaa..,” Haikuan gasped but paused on seeing Yibo’s earnest face. “Is it that obvious?”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is just a filler chapter and also, I snuck in another tiny friends reference!
> 
> Also, I know there are two directors for the Untamed but I just wanted to keep it simple. And don't worry, I'm not shifting my focus from Yizhan to Haikuan-Zanjin...it's just a ship I lowkey am amused by haha!


	117. Penny for your thoughts

* * *

”I saw you with Zheng-laoshi for quite some time, everything okay?” Yibo sat beside Zhan after the toasts to the show and the cast and crew were all done and they had cut the gigantic cake together with the director.

”Yeah, I had a very interesting conversation with him,” Zhan smiled nervously. “He said...people have been calling him, asking about me.”

”What people?” Yibo frowned and narrowed his eyes. “People interested in you?”

”Ayaa!” Zhan rolled his eyes. “Not romantic suitors, Bo-di!” 

”Oh,” Yibo grinned sheepishly. “Then?”

”Directors…”

”Oh! For roles?” Yibo exclaimed with a broad smile.

”Yeah,” Zhan smiled nervously. “Apparently, the show is already creating a buzz in the industry and...people have been inquiring about me and asking if I’m a good fit for their roles. And Zheng-laoshi...said he put in good words for me with everyone.”

”Wow! Zhan-ge! This is awesome!” Yibo clapped his hands together. “Raise your drink...come on!” He pulled Zhan’s glass up and clinked it against his. “Cheers to a very very bright career moving forward.”

”Cheers to both of us and all the doors this will hopefully open for us,” Zhan smiled brightly and raised his glass.

”Cheers to us and our future together,” Yibo leaned forward and whispered before taking a sip of his champagne.

Zhan smiled shyly and took a sip of his drink. He watched as the producer approached them and asked for Wang Yibo to accompany her to meet some people. He watched as Yibo bowed and greeted the people and nodded along to the conversation. His heart warmed as he thought of how now there was a chance for everything to get just a little better for him career wise and how he had to make the most of this narrow opening.

”Penny for your thoughts?” A voice drew Zhan’s attention.

”Zan Jin!” Zhan smiled and gestured for the boy to sit down beside him.

”Hi, ge,” Zan Jin smiled back, “You looked happy…”

”Just feels good to see everyone.”

”Yeah it does,” Zan Jin nodded fondly and Zhan noticed his eyes rest on Haikuan, who stood with Yibo in the distance, for a fleeting moment.

”Can I ask you something honestly, A-Jin,” Zhan lowered his voice.

”Oh, umm...yeah?”

”Is there...do you...like someone from the cast?”

Zan Jin nearly choked on his drink and looked flustered. Zhan handed him a tissue and waited patiently for him to recover.

”You don't have to say anything...I just have a feeling...and wanted to help...if you want to talk to someone about it…”

”Uhh...ge...it’s not like that,” Zan Jin stuttered.

”Okay,” Zhan smiled kindly and patted Zan Jin’s shoulder. “All I’ll say is that if you do...if you really do like someone, be brave. It pays to be brave.”

* * *

”So, like I was saying before,” Yibo turned to Haikuan once they were alone again. “Yes, you two are obvious and yes I think you should make a move on him before someone else does.”

”So much for tact, Yibo,” Haikuan shook his head in amusement. 

”Yeah, not my strong suit,” Yibo grinned. “But seriously, if it’s worth it...take the shot...I got lucky...I would have never dreamed of saying anything to Zhan-ge...but he did and thank god for that.”

”I just...I never...I’ve never…”

”Liked a guy before?” Yibo spoke in a low voice. “Join the club.”

”So...I should...you’re right,” Haikuan gazed at Zan Jin who was currently sitting with Zhan, “...I should...yeah,” he cleared his throat.

”Oh my god...you can barely finish this sentence...do you want me to do it for you?” Yibo asked matter of factly.

”That’s a hard no,” Haikuan gave Yibo an unimpressed look. 

”So you’ll do it?”

”Fine! I...I’ll do it,” Haikuan nodded firmly and downed his drink.

* * *

”Shh…,” Zhan suddenly interrupted Zan Jin who was finally talking to him about his crush. “They’re coming here! Act normal.”

”What’re you two talking about?” Yibo pulled a chair beside Zhan and smiled at Zan Jin. 

Haikuan shuffled around between chairs but finally took the one beside Zan Jin.

”Nothing, just catching up on each other’s life,” Zhan shrugged and took another sip of his drink.

”Yeah,” Zan Jin nodded a little eagerly. “Just...regular catching up...nothing in particular…”

”A-Jin,” Haikuan began but then paused hesitantly.

”Uhh...yeah?”

”Umm...I was...I was wondering if I could talk to you...privately,” he looked away and bit his lips before glancing at Zan Jin once again.

”How about you two chat here. We need to mingle around more...Zhan-ge has been sitting here like an old man all evening,” Yibo grabbed Zhan by the arm and began dragging him away.

”I have?” Zhan asked in surprise as Yibo took him away from the table but on seeing the expression on his face, Zhan nodded in realization. “Oh yeah...I mean...I have...see you two later.”

As they walked away without glancing back, Zhan and Yibo snickered.

”Is he going to…,” Zhan whispered.

”Yep,” Yibo nodded smugly. “All thanks to me.”

”Wow, nicely done, didi. I managed to get Zan Jin to talk to me about it too.”

”Really? That’s perfect. They’re both primed and ready for the confession.”

”Hopefully it goes better than when I confessed to you!” Zhan rolled his eyes and punched Yibo in the arm.

”Hey!” Yibo rubbed his arm. “Sorry, ge,” He looked at Zhan guiltily. “I was so stupid.”

”But then you slept outside my door all night and didn't give up,” Zhan’s eyes and voice softened.

”How could I not?” Yibo smiled gently. “I was not about to let the love of my life slip through my fingers.”

Zhan felt his heart flutter and his knees went weak.

”I want to kiss you so bad, ge,” Yibo bit his lips. “I want to hold your hand, and kiss you so fucking bad right now.”

”Yibo,” Zhan threw him a warning glare before biting his own lips. “Me too.”

”Zhan-ge” Yibo hummed as he tried to hold himself back.

”Bo-di,” Zhan looked around nervously.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo sighed and then finally glanced back at their table. “Zhan-ge, look!”

Zhan followed his gaze and his own eyes widened as he noticed Haikuan and Zan Jin smiling, lean in closer, and talking softly, lost in their own world. Something told him that just like him and Yibo, their lives had changed forever.

”It’s not going to be easy on them either,” Zhan took in a long inhale. “But they’ll be fine.”

”Yeah...they will,” Yibo smiled as he stared at Zhan who was still gazing at the two. “Nothing can break them apart," he added, his eyes still fixed on Zhan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't find the whole cast's selfie with the director and group pics from the party - i know they're out there somewhere! - but I found the one of them cutting the cake (the first two pics in this link) -
> 
> https://www.facebook.com/2351428255096703/posts/2377417822497746/
> 
> Update!!! Found the cast group selfie with the director!
> 
> https://twitter.com/127yibo/status/1238137737573793793?s=19


	118. It's me!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To those of you who've asked for bottom Zhan...I've heard you and I never planned on this being a one way thing anyway. So there are chapters where they switch it up, don't worry! And in case you missed it, chapter 68 should satisfy you for now.

* * *

Later that night, Zhan arrived home after Yibo. He had been pulled aside by the director yet again to introduce him to some other producers. His heart was pounding as he raced to the apartment door, bursting with some good news.

”Bo-di!!” Zhan screamed as he dashed inside. “Bo-di!! Guess what? I got it...I got it!”

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo startled as he dropped the game controller and nearly fell off the couch at the sudden chaos.

”I got it, didi...I got the part...I’m going to play Tang San!!!”

”In Douluo!?!?”

”Yes, yes, yes!!!” Zhan yanked Yibo by the arm and lifted him up, spinning him around, laughing heartily.

”Ge! That is amazing news! Congratulations!!” Yibo laughed along.

Zhan put Yibo down and pulled him in for a kiss. They clung to each other and dove into each other impatiently.

”I’ve been waiting to kiss you all evening, ge,” Yibo breathed as he pulled Zhan down with him on the couch. 

”Me too,” Zhan mumbled between licks as he lay back and let Yibo get on top.

They moaned into each other’s mouth as their hips made contact and their erections rubbed against each other.

”Congratulations, ge,” Yibo smiled against his lips. “This is just the beginning.”

”Mmm...I’ll see that one till the end...you better see this to the end as well,” Zhan groped Yibo’s and pushed him down harder, eliciting groans from both of them.

”Promotions are going to be hard,” Zhan mumbled as Yibo began kissing his way down Zhan’s neck. “I could barely keep my distance from you today.”

”Mmm,” Yibo bit down on Zhan’s chest. “Me too.”

”Ahh,” Zhan bit his lip as Yibo raised his shirt and toyed with his nipples. “We’ll have to do better...we can't get caught…”

”Mmm,” Yibo hummed as he licked Zhan’s nipples until they were flushed and erect. “We’ll have to be very, very, very,” he nibbled his way down Zhan’s torso, “careful.”

”Can't think of doing this when we sit next to each other for interviews,” Zhan breathed heavily.

”Or this,” Yibo panted as he unzipped Zhan’s jeans and pulled it down just enough to bury his face in Zhan’s warmth.

”Fuck...definitely not that…”

”And especially not this…,” Yibo grinned as he grabbed Zhan’s erection and licked it hungrily before taking it in his eager mouth.

* * *

Before they knew it, June 27th was upon them. Zhan flitted about the apartment nervously, cleaning everything, pausing only when he heard the door open. 

”You made it!”

”Just in time,” Yibo sighed as he removed his shoes. “But yeah,” he smiled at Zhan tiredly, “I did.”

Zhan resumed his jittery arranging, pillow fluffing, dusting, until he suddenly felt a pair of arms enveloping his waist.

”Gege,” Yibo’s soft lips massaged his ear. “It’s going to be great.”

Zhan let out a long exhale and rested his body against Yibo’s. Yibo pulled Zhan closer and swayed with him from side to side. 

”I should finish cleaning before everyone comes over,” Zhan started to pull away only to be held tighter.

”People are going to love the show, ge,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s cheek. “And the house looks amazing.”

”But I want everything to be…,” Zhan bit his lips.

”Perfect?” Yibo chuckled and turned Zhan around. “Our home is perfect.”

Yibo leaned in for a kiss but just as his lips grazed Zhan’s, there was a knock on the door. 

”Remind me why we invited everyone over again?” He groaned against Zhan’s lips and then bit on the lower lip in frustration.

”So we can all watch the fruits of our hard labour together!” Zhan chuckled and kissed Yibo’s nose.

He rushed to the door and to his joy, in walked Xuan Lu, Zhoucheng, and Yubin. 

”I’m so excited...this is going to be epic!!” Yubin punched his fist in the air as he entered the apartment.

”Make yourself comfortable everyone...Yibo just got back from work...he’s freshening up. And the rest should be here soon.”

A few minutes later, the doorbell rang and Zhan opened it with a bright smile to find Haikuan and Zan Jin waiting on the other side, hand in hand. He gave them a surprised once over and raised an eyebrow.

”I guess congratulations are in order,” Zhan chuckled softly when Zan Jin blushed and let go of Haikuan’s hand. “Come inside...come come!”

By the time Yibo had returned from the shower, everyone had grabbed their drinks and arranged themselves around the coffee table. Xuan Lu and Zhoucheng sat on the single couches on either side of the coffee table. Haikuan and Zan Jin sat on the soft rug spread around the coffee table. Yibo frowned as he saw Yubin sit on the couch beside Zhan and grabbed two beers before making his way to them.

He weaved his way through the bodies seated on the rug and walked to the couch. He nudged Yubin aside with his knees and planted himself between Zhan and him with a huff. Zhan rolled his eyes as he shifted further to one side to make space for Yibo who placed one beer bottle in Zhan’s hand and grabbed his other hand firmly.

”Oh my god! It’s starting!” Xuan Lu exclaimed and clapped her hands.

Everyone cheered as the intro opened with a shot of Wei Wuxian walking along a river with Little Apple in tow. 

”Woohooo, Zhan-ge!!!” Everyone cheered and hooted.

Zhan bit his lips nervously and blushed as Yibo tightened his hold on his hand.

When Lan Wangji appeared on the large screen the hoots turned into whistles and Yibo chuckled as Xuan Lu pretended to swoon. Jiang Cheng made an appearance next and Zhoucheng covered his face in embarrassment as everyone screamed his name in cheer.

”It’s me!!!” Xuan Lu tapped the table in excitement as Jiang Yanli appeared next. 

”And me!” Yubin exclaimed when Wen Ning graced the screen alongside his sister, Wen Qing. “I wish Ziyi could have been here!”

”Wooaaahhh, someone’s looking handsome,” Zhan and Yibo cooed as Lan Xichen’s smiling face appeared next.

Zhan noticed Zan Jin nudge Haikuan as the latter grinned wide.

Zhan intertwined his fingers with Yibo who turned to look at him with a glowing smile. They watched the montage that played out as part of the intro, a whirlwind of nostalgia sweeping over them as they remembered shooting each of those scenes.

”Here we go,” Zhan whispered as the episode finally began.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The episode list -   
> https://cloudpedia.org/list-of-the-untamed-episodes


	119. Maybe we have

* * *

Within the first few seconds of the first episode, the shots of a broken Wei Wuxian, standing at the edge of the cliff, looking lost and devastated, had everyone sniffling and tearing up. 

Zhan felt Yibo clutch his hand and he knew he was reliving that day when they both had been wrung dry of their emotions shooting the death scene. He swallowed his emotions as he saw Lan Wangji’s trembling arm grab onto Wei Wuxian for dear life.

”Xian-Xian,” Xuan Lu murmured as she wiped her tears. 

Zhoucheng walked over to her seat and sat on the armrest, patting her back to console her.

”A-Cheng, no!” Xuan Lu nearly broke down as Jiang Cheng’s figure came into the frame and walked towards the pair on the precipice.

They gasped at the falling figure of Wei Wuxian and then sighed as Lan Wangji’s heartbroken face was brought into focus. Zhan lifted Yibo’s hand to his lips and placed a gentle kiss.

The group let out a collective exhale when the prelude ended and the present day scenes with the juniors began. 

”Ahh...look at Fanxing and Goucheng!” Zan Jin cooed. “Ever the perfect Lan disciples.”

”Look at the group chat,” Haikuan spoke. “The juniors have sent a group selfie...Fanxing, Goucheng, Peixin and Junxiang are watching the episode together as well!”

”We should send a selfie too!” Yubin suggested enthusiastically.

The group huddled together as Haikuan raised his camera up. They smiled brightly as he clicked several photos. When they resumed the episode, the goosebump inducing arrival of Yiling Laozu began.

_”Souls come back. They don't go to the ghost realm. Souls come back.”_

Everyone felt a shudder down their spine as the winds blew and the spirit of Wei Wuxian was summoned to take over Mo Xuanyu’s body.

”I feel like my acting is weak here,” Zhan mumbled more to himself.

”Shut up,” Yibo nudged Zhan. “Don't say bad things about my boyfriend.”

The group awwed in unison when Wei Wuxian remembered Lan Wangji at the sight of Lan Sizhui’s white robes with the cloud patterns. Everyone smiled softly as Wei Wuxian played Wuji on a makeshift flute as he sat alone in the night with a longing look on his face.

”Wow...they definitely left a lot of romantic hints for the original fans,” Xuan Lu’s eyes widened even as she smiled. “It’s already kinda obvious that these two have more than a regular brotherhood bond.”

”Yeah,” Yubin nodded. “Hopefully, the censors don't catch up.”

Everyone glanced at each other on hearing his words. A short silence reigned as the implications rang through everyone’s minds.

”Zheng-laoshi is smart,” Haikuan spoke. “They wouldn't do anything to jeopardize the show. He will strike the right balance.”

Everyone nodded and eventually the smiles returned. As the episode progressed, everyone was engrossed in the mysterious plot. When it was time for Lan Wangji’s grand entrance, hoots and cheers spread around the room. 

”Wow!” Zhoucheng gasped. “You look so...elf like.”

”Ehtereal!” Xuan Lu squealed.

”Thank you, thank you!” Yibo blushed but stood up with a smirk and took a bow.

Zhan rolled his eyes and smacked Yibo on the ass playfully.

”Sit down, you brat!” Zhan chuckled and yanked him back down beside him.

”But you do look ethereal,” Zhan whispered in Yibo’s ear, before placing a light kiss on his cheek.

”Get a room, you two!!” Xuan Lu giggled and shook her head.

”Technically,” Yibo grinned back, “we can….this _is_ our home.”

”Bo-di!!” Zhan groaned and slapped his arm.

”Alright! Next episode!” Zan Jin interrupted and brought everyone’s attention back to the TV.

The second episode was equally thrilling as more characters made their appearance. Everyone’s undivided attention was on the screen as the story unfolded and finally when the Ghost General appeared, the entire room descended into chaos.

”Ooooo!!”

”Wow...you look fierce!”

”What an entrance!! Wow...kickass!”

Yubin blushed as everyone cheered him on and hid his face in embarrassment. Yibo gave a slight frown to Zhan who was also whistling for Yibo.

”Oh come on!” Zhan nudged Yibo. “Be nice, Bo-di.”

Yibo rolled his eyes and turned to Yubin and patted his arm. 

”Cool entry, bro.”

After a few minutes of hype, everyone settled down once again and resumed the episode.

”Wuji is such a beautiful song,” Xuan Lu hummed along as Wei Wuxian played the song on his flute to calm Wen Ning down.

”Wangxian,” Zhan sighed and hummed along as well.

When Wei Wuxian bumped into Lan Wangji, everyone broke into cheers once more.

”Finally!!!!”

”The fated lovers meet again!!!!”

”Wangxiaaaaannnnnnnn!!!” Xuan Lu screeched.

”Wow, look at that intense gaze…who in their right mind would think these are just friends reuniting!!?”

”Aahhh! The chemistry is killing me!” Zan Jin pretended to swoon.

”Aww look at Yibo still staring at his Zhan-ge even when he’s resumed the scene…”

”That’s Lan Wangji still…,” Yibo began explaining, “Ah what the hell...not like I minded…,” he winked at Zhan.

”Wow and the stare fest is still going strong,” Xuan Lu giggled. “Wow...A-Xian is holding his lover’s hand back now!!!”

”You can literally see the thirst!” Yubin chuckled.

”Guess you didn't have to try too hard to act this scene out,” Xuan Lu smirked.

”Shijie!” Zhan laughed, shaking his head.

Towards the end of the episode, when Wei Wuxian fainted, Xuan Lu clasped her hands together in anticipation.

”Look who it is!” Zhan chuckled as the faint call of ‘A-Xian’ could be heard in the new scene. 

”Me!!” Xuan Lu exclaimed happily as the flashback began.

”You look so beautiful!” Zan Jin and Haikuan spoke simultaneously.

”Aww you two, I see you’re getting more in sync too,” Xuan Lu winked. “And thank you!!”

”You do look good...and thus begins the world’s longest flashback,” Zhoucheng grinned and stood up when the episode ended.

Everyone sighed and stretched and got more drinks.

”That was really really good,” Haikuan leaned against the wall. “The effects, the costumes, the characters...they’re slowly coming together and it looks believable on screen.”

”Yeah...hopefully the audience isn't too confused...and come back for the next episodes.”

”They will! The show is so detailed and intricate...they are bound to enjoy it. I think this is going to go really well.”

”Look everyone!” Xuan Lu suddenly screeched and pointed at Zhan and Yibo who startled. “It’s the two male leads of this summer’s hottest drama...Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo!”

”Shijie! Stop it! I almost spilled my drink.”

”How are you two feeling?” Xuan Lu pretended to hold a mic to the pair as if she was the paparazzi. “Who are you wearing? ”

Everyone chuckled as Zhan blushed and Yibo laughed in amusement at Xuan Lu’s antics.

”Describe your experiences of working together! Who’s your favorite co-star apart from each other? Are the rumors true? Are you also seeing each other in real life!”

Everyone ooo’d and ahh’d as she continued her barrage of personal questions.

”Yeah,” Yibo downed his drink and pulled Zhan towards him by his waist. “We’re in a relationship.”

”Oh my!” Xuan Lu continued her roleplay. “Breaking news! How long has this been going on?! What are your plans?! Are you in love!”

Zhan choked on his drink as Yibo held him closer and placed a kiss on his cheek.

”It’s been eight and a half glorious months and a lifetime to go.”

Xuan Lu paused her dramatics and gazed at them fondly. She stepped forward and ruffled Yibo’s hair and smiled widely.

”Alright,” she turned around and addressed the whole group. “Time to go and leave these two lovebirds alone!”

”Thanks for hosting, guys! Maybe we can do this again when we’re all in town for an episode!”

Slowly with more goodbyes and see you soons the group dispersed. 

When Zhan and Yibo had wrapped up and tucked themselves in, Zhan nuzzled closer to Yibo and snuggled him tight.

”Happy eight and a half months of being together,” Zhan smiled and placed kisses on Yibo’s neck. “I can't believe it’s already been that long.”

”Sometimes I feel like we just started...and sometimes it feels like we’ve been together forever,” Yibo sighed and kissed Zhan's head.

”You never know,” Zhan pulled Yibo's face closer to his. “Maybe we have.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The best part of writing this part of the fic is that I'm rewatching the show after several months!!! :D :D :D


	120. Show me how much you love me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to get situated - we're at the end of June 2019!

* * *

> _Bo-di: How’s the Nylon shoot going?  
>    
>  Zhan: Good...still can't believe they pulled this together in such a short amount of time! The issue will be out in a few days!  
>    
>  Bo-di: They just had to get their hands on the hottest thing in showbiz, ge _😉 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: They even put together a shoot on a weekend...barely two days after our show debuted!  
>    
>  Zhan: Orrrr...someone cancelled in the last minute and they needed an easy replacement _😋 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Zhan-ge!  
>    
>  Zhan: Okay, okay...I’ll stop!  
>    
>  Zhan: But it’s going amazing...there’s a lot of buzz for our show...even the staff here have fans among them!  
>    
>  Bo-di: When will you be home? Send me some pics! I miss you, ge _🙁 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Soon, puppy _😘 _  
>   
>  _

Zhan asked the photographer if he could share some of the photos with him and was surprised when his request was immediately fulfilled along with being asked if he needed anything else. Zhan was not used to this treatment. It was as if he was not Xiao Zhan but someone else. His thoughts were interrupted when a shy girl came up to him, followed closely by more of the staff, as he sent the photos to Yibo.

”Hello, Xia...Xiao Zhan,” she blushed and bowed repeatedly. “I was wondering...if I could...get an autograph and a photo with you? I am a huge fan of the Untamed!”

”Oh,” Zhan’s eyes widened and he nearly blushed himself. “Su...sure. Umm...where would you like the autograph?”

* * *

On the drive back home, Zhan received an email from Long Danni asking for an urgent meeting at Wajijiwa. Zhan frowned as his heart began racing.

_Now what is this about? I hope they’re not going to give me more troubles. They already cost me so many auditions and even delayed the Wolf...I won't let them come in the way of the Untamed!_

> _Zhan: Bo-di...just got an email from Wajijiwa  
>    
>  Bo-di: Oh...everything okay?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah...they’ve asked me to an urgent meeting with Long Danni  
>    
>  Bo-di: Hmm...you okay? Want me to come?  
>    
>  _

Zhan’s heart warmed and he smiled to himself.

_My sweet boyfriend._

> _Zhan: That’s sweet, didi but how on earth would we explain that?! I’ll be fine.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Okay, ge. Let me know how it goes.  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah...you should go ahead and eat...I might be late  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’ll wait  
>    
>  Zhan: Didi...you had a long day too...eat  
>    
>  Bo-di: wait  
>    
>  Zhan: eat  
>    
>  Bo-di: wait  
>    
>  Zhan: Bo-di…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Zhan-ge…  
>    
>  Zhan: Bo-di…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Zhan-ge…  
>    
>  Zhan: Ayaa...fine! But if I’m too late, please eat a little!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Okay _😘 _  
>   
>  _

* * *

Yibo put his phone aside when he heard the door open. He yawned and stretched in bed as he waited for Zhan to come in. But even after a few minutes had passed, Zhan didn't come.

”Ge? I’m in the bedroom.”

No response.

”Ge? Do you wanna have dinner? I ate a little but I’m still hungry.”

Still nothing.

Yibo frowned and stepped out into the living room to find Zhan seated at the dining table, elbows on the table, head in his hands. 

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo knelt beside Zhan and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Is everything okay? Are you tired?”

Zhan lifted his head from his hands and stared down at Yibo with teary eyes. Yibo grew alarmed and turned Zhan’s body towards him.

”Hey,” he tried to speak as calmly as he could, “what...what happened? Why are you crying, sweetheart?” He placed his hands on Zhan’s cheeks.

Zhan said nothing but kept staring into Yibo’s worried eyes. A few seconds later, he got on the floor in front of Yibo and fell into his arms. Yibo’s eyes widened as Zhan began crying profusely.

”What happened with Wajijiwa?” Yibo tried to speak gently even as he grit his teeth.

Zhan pulled away just enough to look Yibo in the face. He wiped his tears and took in a long inhale.

”I’m going to file a lawsuit against them.”

Yibo froze when he heard the words.

”In today’s meeting, they went over all the royalty and commission breakdowns for my earnings for 2019.”

”They did that because of the Untamed doing well, didn't they?”

”I guess they think it’s going to do really well...which is good...but now they’re tightening their noose around me.”

”That isn't fair...they can't not promote you but then take a large share of your earnings when you manage to do well on your own!”

”I know,” Zhan grew quiet and looked down.

”Hey,” Yibo tilted his face up by the chin. “We’ll figure this out. Have you spoken to anyone about the lawsuit?”

”Yeah...Chu Yue and I had discussed this once in the past and his father knows a lawyer.”

”Oh,” Yibo frowned for a second but then schooled his expression, “that’s...good. You should speak to the lawyer.”

”Yeah...I think I will,” Zhan paused for another second before speaking again. “It’s just that...all my savings are going to get blown away if I do this. The lawsuit can go on for months if not years...”

”I have a lot of money,” Yibo shrugged.

”Bo-di!” Zhan chuckled through his tears. “Always so blunt.”

”I’m serious. Don't worry about it. You can always pay me back later.”

”And what if I can't?”

”You can always pay me back in kind,” Yibo winked.

”Bo-di,” Zhan sighed and shook his head as he ruffled Yibo’s hair. “I can't...it won't be right…”

”Why won't it, ge? You’re my best friend….my boyfriend...my family...my life partner...don't we share everything else? And if this was the other way around, what would you do?”

Zhan blinked in astonishment at the urgency with which Yibo spoke. But he couldn't reject the case Yibo made. He would have insisted on the same if it was the other way around.

”I...I…”

”You...you nothing,” Yibo mimicked and then pulled Zhan into his arms. “Don't worry about that...if you ever need any money...we can figure that out...right now, you need to focus on the lawsuit and your work...nothing else.”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded and held Yibo tight. “How was your day?”

”Nothing compared to yours,” Yibo huffed as he massaged Zhan’s head.

”No, tell me,” Zhan sat up again and held Yibo’s hands in his. “It’s just as important.”

They sat on the floor together, Yibo leaning against the dining table leg and Zhan leaning against Yibo’s chest, hand in hand. Zhan played with Yibo’s fingers as the boy recounted his day, the shoots he had coming up and the happenings at TTXS. 

Eventually, when they had caught up with each other’s day, Zhan snuggled against Yibo and refused to get up when Yibo suggested they eat something.

”Not hungry,” Zhan pouted.

”Not even a bit?” Yibo smiled and shook his head as he moved aside a strand of Zhan’s hair from his forehead.

”No,” Zhan sighed.

”How about sleep...are you sleepy?”

”No,” Zhan shook his head and snuggled closer to Yibo.

”So you’re not hungry and not sleepy and it’s almost 11 in the night. What do you want to do then?”

”I want you to fuss over me,” Zhan giggled and tilted his face up to Yibo, scrunching his nose. 

”Is that so?” Yibo chuckled and kissed Zhan’s nose. “And how do you want me to fuss over you?”

Zhan didn't say anything but Yibo noticed his lips quiver as his eyes darkened.

Sweetheart,” Yibo whispered as he bent forward to place a kiss on Zhan’s lips, “tell me…,” he punctuated each word with a kiss on Zhan’s soft lips.

”Show me how much you love me,” Zhan whispered before closing his eyes as Yibo deepened the kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a cute XZ video from the previous Bazaar shoot -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3-2G0jCZn4g
> 
> Photos from the Nylon shoot -  
> https://www.weibo.com/6298663816/HBUkD0Soq?type=comment#_rnd1584048198572
> 
> A brief summary of the situation between XZ and Wajijiwa (I’m not sure how reliable this channel is but a lot of his facts do match my google search and it also explains the support XZ has gotten from He Jiong and Xie Na) -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ilgvLuWzCb0
> 
> Also, in the real world, it seems Xiao Zhan filed the lawsuit in May not July but I'm taking liberties for the sake of my plot.


	121. So very truly deeply loved

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So just to address some of the top/bottom dynamic comments - 
> 
> 1\. I've mapped out the whole story till the present day and written chapters up until Oct 2020. So don't worry, I have mixed things up and they do switch :)
> 
> 2\. Personally, I still have a preference for top XZ/bottom Yibo and that is why you will see this dynamic more frequently than the other.
> 
> 3\. I am definitely a zsww person but I don't believe in absolutes that's why even though XZ is on top most of the time, he isn't only dominant or alpha-like in his behavior. Because everyone is complex and multifaceted. He is cute, funny, shy, insecure along with assertive, physically dominant and possessive. Same with Yibo. They are a mix of all these traits. 
> 
> Sorry for the long note. Hope you enjoy the chapter!

* * *

Yibo’s heart skipped as he heard Zhan’s words. He leaned in as soon as Zhan’s lips had uttered the last word and sealed their lips together. Zhan turned around and straddled Yibo’s hips as they deepened the kiss. He pulled Yibo closer to his body, desperate for warmth and closeness. All Zhan wanted was for Yibo to replace the anxiety he felt in his chest with his love and passion. His entire body yearned for Yibo’s touch, which Yibo gave to him freely and abundantly.

Yibo moaned into Zhan’s mouth when Zhan pressed his hips down on Yibo’s now erect dick. The hardness made Zhan gasp and all he wanted was to feel Yibo inside him. Zhan stood up and dragged Yibo into the bedroom. Their hands were all over each other and their kisses turned messy and passionate. As they made their way inside, they removed each other’s clothes and strew them about carelessly. They stood by the bed for several minutes, kissing, feeling, moaning. 

”I love you,” Yibo mumbled breathlessly in between kisses as his hands roamed Zhan’s body, stopping at his ass.

”Show me...I...I need you,” Zhan whispered and he could feel the back of his eyes burn as the need manifested itself as an ache in his heart.

Yibo didn't need any further explanation. He walked Zhan onto the bed and lay down beside him. He pulled Zhan close as they lay on their sides until he was pressed flat against him. 

Yibo ran his hand down Zhan’s back and cupped his ass. Zhan wrapped his leg around Yibo’s hip, giving him more access. Yibo stretched back and grabbed the lube from the nightstand and managed to get some out on his fingers without distancing himself too much from Zhan. He could feel Zhan needed to be close to him, he could feel Zhan needed him to engulf all his senses. And Yibo wanted nothing more than to do that as well.

As Zhan writhed against him, Yibo’s hand reached behind him and slowly inserted one finger into Zhan. Zhan gasped and found Yibo’s lips once more, lapping at the lower lip. When Yibo inserted another finger and began scissoring him open, Zhan bit on his lip and grabbed onto his hair.

”Are you okay? Is this...okay?” Yibo whispered softly.

”Mmm…,” Zhan whimpered. “I want this...I want you inside me…”

”Okay,” Yibo smiled as he prodded further into Zhan.

The last and only time Yibo had been in Zhan was when they brought in the new year together. There was something about a vulnerable and soft Zhan that made Yibo want to envelope him in his body and protect him. There was something about a submissive yet demanding Zhan that made Yibo want to give him everything he wanted, exactly how he wanted it.

And although the last time it had been sheer lust and a primal desire that Zhan had craved, this time it was tender love that he needed. Yibo’s body wanted nothing more than to show Zhan how much he loved and cared for him.

When Yibo found Zhan’s spot, he massaged it over and over again with his fingers. Zhan moaned and whimpered against his lips and Yibo’s erection twitched with every sound that came from Zhan’s mouth.

”I...I’m ready, didi,” Zhan trembled in Yibo’s arms.

Yibo got on top of Zhan and pushed his knees up to his chest. He planted kisses from his knee, down his thigh, up his chest until their lips found each other once more.

Yibo lined himself with Zhan’s opening and slowly entered him. The last time he had done this, he had a condom on. Nothing could have prepared him for the sensations he felt now that he was going in raw and bare.

He let out a long groan as he bottomed out. By the time he was fully inside, Zhan was breathing heavily and clutching the sheets. In Yibo’s eyes, he was a vision to behold. Flushed red all over his neck, chest rising and falling with every movement Yibo made, lips trembling from the helpless moans that escaped them, body writhing and shivering with each thrust. 

Yibo felt himself harden even more at the sight of his boyfriend. He leaned forward and licked Zhan’s chest, played with his nipples using his tongue, bit down on his neck but held off on leaving marks, channeled all his love and passion into every thrust as he entered him deeper each time.

”Fuck…,” Zhan moaned. “Yes...don't stop...Yibo…”

Yibo didn't want to stop either. He kept going until both of them were losing their minds. He kept going until their moans grew louder in unison and their bodies were sweaty and hot. He kept going until he couldn't hold himself back any more.

He rammed into Zhan, one hand wrapping under Zhan’s arched back and the other reaching for his erection. He took Zhan’s lip in his, both wet and messy with their unencumbered gasps. He stroked Zhan’s length in time with his thrusts until their bodies resonated together in perfect harmony.

Yibo moved faster and harder, driving himself to the edge and carrying Zhan along with him. With one final deep push, his entire body caved and he shuddered onto Zhan as he came endlessly. A second later, Zhan followed him, driven over the edge by the sensation of Yibo’s warm cum filling him up. 

As their sounds subsided, their bodies grew weak, and they lay plastered against each other. Yibo felt Zhan move gently every now and then, making sure to draw out the pleasure as much as possible for the both of them.

”Ge…,” Yibo said after several seconds had passed. “Fuck...that was good…”

”Yeah,” Zhan nodded breathlessly, “Uhuh,” he wiped the sweat off of his forehead. “That was…”

Yibo grinned and brought his face closer to Zhan. He gazed into his eyes as he pulled out slowly, wanting to see the slight hitch in Zhan’s breath when he did so. 

”How are you feeling now?”

”Loved,” Zhan sighed and his face broke into a radiant smile.

”Good. Because you are. So very truly, deeply loved.”


	122. Are you really?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Currently, we're at June 30, 2019

* * *

When Zhan got home the next night, he was exhausted. He had been shuttling from one meeting to the next, trying to make the most of his free time, before the Untamed promotions began, to speak with the lawyers. He trudged inside and face planted into the couch. 

”Zhan-ge?”

Zhan lifted his head off the couch and saw Yibo walking out of the bedroom, drying his hair with a towel, clearly fresh out of the shower. He gave him a tired smile and sat up. Yibo walked over and knelt in front of Zhan. 

He ran his fingers through Zhan’s hair and placed a kiss on Zhan’s nose. Before he could pull away, Zhan held him in place by the back of his head and enveloped Yibo’s lips. Zhan felt all his exhaustion melt away as Yibo kissed him back, softly and lovingly.

”Hey,” Yibo smiled when they pulled away but remained nose to nose, forehead to forehead.

”Hi,” Zhan smiled back and let out a long sigh.

”Guess what?” Zhan saw a spark light up in Yibo’s eyes.

”What?”

”Somehow...I’ve reached 16 million followers on Weibo!”

”What?!” Zhan sat up straight. “Weren’t you at 15 million just a few days back?!”

”Yeah...it’s the Untamed...our views are in the hundreds of millions already and only four episodes are out...”

”Bo-di!!!” Zhan cupped Yibo’s face. “That’s so good! I’m so proud of you!”

”Check your Weibo!”

Zhan bit his lip for a second before pulling his phone out. He almost didn't want to see his followers for fear of being disappointed. When he opened the app, however, his eyes bulged out of their sockets.

”I...what...ten...million?!” Zhan stuttered. “It was barely seven million a few days back!”

”Wow!!" Yibo launched himself on Zhan and they fell back on the couch. “Congrats, ge...this is only the beginning.”

”Fuck,” Zhan exclaimed, still in shock, “fuck...our lives are going to change, aren’t they?”

”My life has already changed,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s neck before straightening up again. 

Zhan smiled and hugged Yibo on hearing his words.

”Mine too,” Zhan sighed against Yibo’s shoulder. “Mine too.” 

”How were your meetings? With the lawyers?” Yibo massaged Zhan’s back.

Zhan pulled away and made space for Yibo on the couch. He shrugged and pursed his lips. 

”As fine as it could have been. We spoke to Chu Yue’s dad’s friend...he said it’s going to be complicated but worth a shot.”

”We?”

”A-Yue and me,” Zhan mumbled. “We’ve both decided to sue Wajijiwa...separately but simultaneously...might even make our cases stronger.”

”Oh...hmm,” Yibo controlled the vinegar he could feel creeping up his throat. 

”You have nothing to worry about,” Zhan rolled his eyes and grinned. “He’s seeing someone!”

”Really?” Yibo was surprised. “Wow...that’s...good news!”

”Look at the relief on your face,” Zhan chuckled and patted Yibo’s cheek. "Also, I’m not sure of it, but I may get the chance to audition for another show...one of the producers of Jade Dynasty has been promoting me apparently and one of the producers of Douluo...you remember him? He is the son in law of one of my co-actors in Joy of Life?”

”Yeah,” Yibo nodded.

”He has been very supportive too...so I guess my network is growing,” Zhan played with Yibo’s fingers. “It’s not just me who’s fighting tooth and nail to get auditions any more….hopefully.”

”That’s great, ge,” Yibo intertwined their fingers, “mark my words, this is only the beginning. The whole industry is going to sit up and take notice of Xiao Zhan.”

Zhan let out a long exhale and leaned back against the couch. He smiled at Yibo, still tired but frowned when he took the time to observe Yibo. Both of them had lost a ton of weight during the shoot of the Untamed but they had recovered more or less over the last few months.

But now that he stared at Yibo he noticed how his face was still lean in comparison to the start of their shoot. He noticed the bags under Yibo’s eyes and the paleness of his skin. 

”You look exhausted, Bo-di...your schedule has been crazy...did you eat at all today?”

”I had some quick ramen at Yuehua between rehearsals.”

”You’ve been running from one photoshoot to the other all of last month….you need to take better care of yourself...come here,” Zhan turned to Yibo and pulled him closer.

He placed his hands on Yibo’s shoulder and began massaging them. Yibo groaned and Zhan was surprised at how much relief Yibo felt with barely one touch. He frowned as he felt the tension in Yibo’s back and shoulders.

”Okay, you need a proper massage,” Zhan shook his head and guided Yibo to sit on the floor between his legs. 

”You’re tired too, ge...you’ve had a long day,” Yibo protested.

”Shut up,” Zhan kissed the back of Yibo’s neck. “Now put on TTXS...I want to watch today’s episode.”

”I’m right here! You still want to watch me on the screen?!”

”Hey! I like the show...it’s really fun and a good stress buster! Plus you look cute and I get to watch my cute boyfriend in two places at once,” Zhan smirked.

”I’m not cute!” Yibo scowled and bit Zhan’s thigh.

”You’re my baby lion,” Zhan planted kisses all around Yibo’s neck.

Yibo smiled and turned on the TV. When he found the right channel, he put the remote aside and leaned back into Zhan’s touch. Satisfied, Zhan resumed the massage and smiled when Yibo hummed and moaned as he worked on all his tight knots.

As the episode began and four of the Rocket girls joined the TTXS hosts, Zhan bit his lips.

_No matter what happens, you are not going to get jealous when Yibo interacts with the girls._

”Don’t worry...I don't dance with any of them,” Yibo pulled one of Zhan’s hand forward and planted a kiss on it, as if sensing Zhan’s thoughts. 

”I don't care,” Zhan replied hastily. “I’m over all that silliness.”

”Are you really?” Yibo turned around and smirked. 

”Shut up,” Zhan showed Yibo his tongue and turned him around to continue massaging him.

”This was a fun episode though...very sporty and active...I got to try a bunch of things like fancy rope swinging and other games.”

”Nice!” Zhan moved his attention from Yibo’s shoulders to his upper back. “I bet Yamy liked it too...I remember thinking she’s similar to you when I met everyone...fiesty, active, straightforward, confident...”

”Yeah...she did well…”

”What about the other girls...were they able to keep up?”

”I think they had fun too…”

”It’s a pity Xuan Yi and Mei Qi couldn't be here...even they had management troubles,” Zhan clucked his tongue as he kneaded into Yibo’s back.

”Yeah,” Yibo pursed his lips. “They had to leave Yuehua and even leave the group altogether but they might be making a comeback...it’s all so fucked up.” 

”I forgot the names of the other three,” Zhan moved his hands down to his mid back.

”The one witht the long black hair is Mimi, she’s Thai. The short one is Lai Meiyun, and the one at the other end is Zining.”

”And which one of them flirted with you the most?”

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo turned around, wide eyed, surprised at Zhan’s bluntness. “I thought you said you were over this.”

”I am! I won't be jealous...just curious.”

”None of them!!”

”Yibo, ah Yibo!” Zhan shook his head. “You’re so clueless.”

”And you’re so jealous.”

”Why would I be jealous?! You’re not even interacting with these girls!”

”Aha!” Yibo exclaimed and snapped his fingers. “So you _would_ be if I was. I knew it!”

”That’s….that’s not what I meant,” Zhan blinked and pouted.

”Uhuh. If you say so,” he smirked and pecked Zhan’s pouting lips.

”I’m not!” Zhan exclaimed as Yibo wrapped his arms around him and continued to shower his face with kisses. "Bo-di!!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TTXS June 30th episode -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kh3UA4hUiA&list=PLUM8x224JrX_kJm3syb7Fz2zoNP6J-N0N&index=25
> 
> Also, both Xiao Zhan and Yibo gained insane number of followers but the numbers I have stated are fictional since I don't know their weibo history and follower stats.


	123. You're not fragile

* * *

When the games began, Zhan noticed Yibo’s minimal participation. He was sitting a lot and didn't seem too enthusiastic. He noticed Yibo tapping his foot and knocking on his thighs once in a while.

”I thought you would be all over these games…”

”I just...wanted to make sure everyone got a chance…”

”Bo-di?”

”I was just so exhausted,” Yibo sighed and dropped his head forward. “I’ve been feeling so exhausted lately…”

Before Zhan could say anything, Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and rested his head in Zhan’s lap. For a while, he didn't say anything and Zhan waited patiently. When the silence extended into several more seconds, Zhan ran his hand through Yibo’s hair and spoke.

”What is it, didi?” Zhan said softly.

”I’m just...I’ve been feeling very weak lately.”

”Physically?”

”Yeah...and I’m worried…”

”Why? Is it very bad?”

”I had myocarditis as a child…”

Zhan’s hands paused and his heart skipped a beat.

”It was pretty touch and go there for a while...and I had become so weak and fragile..they told me I wouldn't be able to dance again...I was so scared...when I did get better, I had to restart all over again. I had to train my body from scratch. Took me so long to gain my strength and stamina again.”

”Bo-di...you never told me any of this,” Zhan began but then paused. “Is it still something you are at risk of now?”

”Not really...but my heart is weaker now...it was pretty severe back then...so it has some long term effects on my heart. I’m sorry I never brought it up...I usually don't...I did mention it to my students on 101 though...I felt that knowing the story might inspire them when they were very upset and exhausted. It just...never came up with you...”

”Bo-di,” Zhan’s voice grew soft. “I...I wish you had told me...but it’s okay...do you think that’s the reason you’ve been feeling weak?”

”I’m not sure. It hasn't given me any severe problems since my childhood…”

”Maybe you should see a doctor,” Zhan massaged Yibo’s head. “Just to be safe.”

”I don't like feeling weak and fragile,” Yibo raised his head off Zhan’s lap and looked up at him.

”You’re not fragile...you’re the strongest person I know...if you hadn't told me about this I would never have guessed you have a medical problem...that’s how hard you work. And you never once complain.”

Zhan bent forward and kissed Yibo. He felt his entire body shiver at the thought of Yibo’s weak heart and the issues that could lead to. He deepened the kiss to brush the thought aside. He wanted to feel Yibo, he wanted to feel just how alive and healthy he was, he wanted to feel his fiery spirit.

As the kiss deepened, the show was forgotten and Yibo climbed onto the couch and straddled Zhan. Zhan leaned back and pulled Yibo closer, tightening his arms around his body. 

”Are you upset I didn't tell you?” Yibo spoke as Zhan caressed his cheeks and kissed him along the jawline. 

”A little...but what’s important is,” Zhan pulled away and looked into Yibo’s eyes, “that you take care of yourself and go see a doctor now, just to...be sure. Can you do that for me?”

”Okay,” Yibo nodded slowly and kissed Zhan’s nose.

”Good,” Zhan hugged him close. “And next time, don't keep these things from me.”

”Hmm,” Yibo turned his face to kiss Zhan’s neck.

He remained on Zhan’s lap, locked in the embrace for several minutes. Zhan opened his eyes and just then noticed the episode once again where Yibo skipping in two ropes along with one of the girls, Lai Meiyun.

”What is she trying to do??!” Zhan blurted before he could reign in his reaction.

”What? Who?” Yibo sat up and turned around, following Zhan’s gaze. 

He saw himself and Meiyun skipping and noticed her stretching her arms towards him in a half heart, expecting him to join in and complete the heart. To his embarrassment and amusement, he hadn't noticed her doing that and even when he did, he wasn't sure he completely understood what she was trying to do. It was only now, when he was seeing it as a third person on the TV did he realize what had happened and how he had left her hanging.

”Wow,” Yibo grinned sheepishly. “I didn't realize that happened. Poor Meiyun.”

”Poor Meiyun!?” Zhan exclaimed and pushed Yibo off him and to one side. 

”Ah! Zhan-ge! What happened?”

”You said no one flirted with you. THAT is flirting, Yibo!”

Yibo burst into laughter and clutched his sides when he saw Zhan’s pouty expression and annoyed frown as he watched the TV screen.

”You’re so clueless, Wang Yibo. You didn't even realize she was trying to get close to you and be all cute!”

”Who cares...I didn't even notice,” Yibo sat up and wrapped his arms around Zhan. “I only notice you when you get all cute...and you said you won't get jealous any more,” he grinned and kissed Zhan’s cheek.

”I...I’m not…,” Zhan began but was interrupted when a set of lips enveloped his.

Yibo pushed him back until he was laying on the couch. He felt Yibo’s warm body on top of him as Yibo smiled into the kiss.

”You’re so fucking cute when you get jealous,” Yibo murmured.

”Fine!” Zhan pushed Yibo away. “I’m jealous. I hate the way girls look at you,” Zhan pouted like a baby.

”Aww,” Yibo melted and kissed Zhan’s lips softly. 

”Come here,” Yibo adjusted himself to one side and wrapped his arms around Zhan until they were cuddling as they lay together.

Zhan snuggled against Yibo and buried his face in his chest.

”Let’s change the channel. Wanna watch a movie?”

”Mmm,” Zhan nodded.

Yibo smiled fondly as he flipped through channels until he found one where a romantic movie was playing.

”I love you, my cute bunny,” Yibo held Zhan tighter.

”I hate you,” Yibo could hear the pout in Zhan’s muffled voice and chuckled.

He tipped Zhan’s face up and began kissing him gently. The rest of the movie was spent losing themselves in each other’s arms, grinding against each other, melting into each other, writhing and panting and making out until their lips were red and they were breathless.


	124. Maybe he'd be into this

* * *

> _Bo-di: Guess what, ge?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Ayunga and Zheng Yunlong are going to be on TTXS again...shooting with them right now  
>    
>  Zhan: Oh, cool! How are they? Tell them I said hi!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Yeah, they were asking about you too  
>    
>  Bo-di: Ok, gtg now...will message you later_😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Miss you!  
>    
>  Zhan: _😘 

Yibo, as usual, didn't say much during the episode but he was glad this time that he knew two of the guests well enough to have a chat with in the breaks.

”Congratulations on the drama...I’ve heard it’s doing really well!” Ayunga smiled at Yibo.

”Thank you,” Yibo bowed. “Yeah, ten episodes are out and our viewership is in the multi-millions. It’s crazy.”

”A-Zhan must be thrilled!” Ayunga exclaimed.

”Yeah, it’s a huge relief to all of us,” Yibo nodded brightly.

As the episode progressed, Yibo found himself thoroughly entertained with the stories and interactions between Ayunga and Yunlong. One moment, in particular, captivated him. It was an old video of Ayunga in heels.

Now, the video itself didn't do much for Yibo. But the first thing that happened to pop into his mind as he saw Ayunga dance around in the heels was - _I could do that better_. And the second thought that crossed his mind was - _Would Zhan-ge like that?_

_He has mentioned he thinks I’m hot when I dance. He loves the way I move. Maybe...maybe he’d be into this._ Yibo grinned to himself.

”What’s with that naughty smile?” Qian Feng interrupted Yibo’s now very dirty thought process.

Yibo flustered immediately and cleared his throat as Qian Feng approached him.

”Nothing, ge...just found the video funny...I was imagining how...hard it would be...walking in them,” Yibo grinned mischievously, secretly pleased with himself at his wordplay.

”Yeah,” Qian Feng laughed, nodding. “I’ve been made to walk in heels once before...not fun!”

”I remember being on stilts for one episode, remember?”

”Didn't you nail that? Heels shouldn't be a big challenge for you, Yibo!”

_He’s right._ Yibo grew excited at the thought. _Heels shouldn't be a challenge. Zhan-ge will love it._

* * *

A few nights later, when Zhan entered the apartment, he immediately noticed the dim ambient lights and scented candles. The apartment itself seemed cleaner. Before he could walk in any further, a voice drifted out of the bedroom from behind the closed door.

”Zhan-ge?”

”Bo-di?”

Wait there, don't come in!” Yibo exclaimed.

”Oh, okay...are you alright?” Zhan raised an eyebrow as he sat on the backrest of the couch.

”Yeah...just gimme a min...get comfortable, ge...shoes off...bags off…”

”What’s going on, didi?” Zhan chuckled.

”You’ll see,” and Zhan could hear the smirk in Yibo’s voice.

After a few more minutes, Zhan heard music. He looked up from his phone. The door was partially open. The music was sensual with a good rhythm to it. Zhan’s curiosity was piqued when the music became a bit louder.

”Yibo?” Zhan tried to get a glimpse inside the room through the narrow opening but to no avail.

Just as he was about to look back down to his phone, Zhan’s heart stopped beating when a leg came into view. Yibo’s leg to be precise. Yibo’s leg in tight black leather pants to be more precise. And Yibo’s leg in tight black leather pants wearing black pole heels that were laced up till his calf to be astonishingly precise.

Zhan’s jaw dropped, as did his phone. But the only thing he was aware of in that moment was the way the leg slid up and down the edge of the door, slow and seductive, to the rising beat and the way Yibo’s toes were pointed, making his leg seem even longer, in a perfect extended line. 

As Zhan’s eyes wandered up and down the leg, his attention was drawn up to where long fingers curled themselves around the edge of the door. The leg straightened itself and the heels hit the ground with a deep click, making Zhan’s heart skip a beat. Slowly, the fingers pulled the door open and the culprit behind Zhan’s racing heart revealed himself.

If Zhan thought his jaw couldn't drop any lower, he was wrong. And along with his jaw, his heart dropped to his feet as Yibo’s lithe, lean, toned body came into view. Zhan licked his lips as he eyed Yibo, who was covered from head to toe in black - a tight black full sleeve translucent shirt with only a few buttons done, revealing Yibo's chest, and even tighter black leather pants - and of course the devastating heels. 

Zhan gulped as Yibo stood in the door frame - no, posed in the door frame - with both hands resting above his head, crossed at the wrist, one leg extended and the other weight bearing hip jutting out. Tall, graceful, cocky and confident - Yibo was a sight to behold.

As the beat picked up and the lyrics began, Yibo strutted towards Zhan. One foot crossing in front of the other, the clicks of his heels echoing in Zhan’s ears, competing with his racing heart. Yibo halted every few steps, striking a pose, spinning around to reveal his tight ass, running his hands all over his body and through his damp hair, until he mere feet away from Zhan.

Yibo maintained a grip on Zhan’s eyes and heart. Never once breaking eye contact, he smirked knowing he had Zhan exactly where he wanted. He stood in front of Zhan, teasing and tempting. He licked his lips slowly and intentionally as his hips swayed side to side with the pulsing beats.

”Fuck.” Zhan muttered under his breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 14th july ttxs episode with ayunga and yunlong and the ayunga in heels clip -  
> https://youtu.be/ejv50I931uU?list=PLUM8x224JrX_kJm3syb7Fz2zoNP6J-N0N&t=2605 
> 
> How I imagine Yibo dressed for his little performance for Zhan (the one with the open shirt but let your imagination run wild!) -  
> https://www.out.com/sites/out.com/files/2015/01/22/KAZAKY-by-Kate-Kondratieva.jpg  
> https://fashionfromthebackrow.files.wordpress.com/2012/04/phpthumb.png
> 
> The song to listen to when reading this -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VCLxJd1d84s


	125. Be careful what you ask for

* * *

Yibo’s smirk widened when he saw Zhan’s face. He had him in the palm of his hand. As the beats picked up with the lyrics, Yibo rolled his body in waves, still staring straight at Zhan. Zhan’s eyes, on the other hand, were following Yibo’s hand that was trailing down his chest. 

He could see Zhan gulp as his hand slid all the way down and rested on his partially erect dick. Yibo began massaging it as his body continued to undulate seductively, until it was fully erect.

Zhan let out a heavy breath and Yibo could see the way he was clutching the couch beneath him. Yibo tugged at his dick over the leather and bit his lip, throwing his head back and shutting his eyes, groaning at the pleasure. 

He dropped down to his knees as the beat reverberated through the apartment and continued rolling his body and sliding his knees on the ground more aggressively, staring at Zhan as he licked his lips.

As the music stretched in erotic sounds, Yibo placed his hands on the floor and got on all fours. He rotated his neck and arched his back, popping it to the beat. He began crawling towards Zhan, who was still rooted to his spot, leaning against the back of the couch. 

With each move forward, Zhan eyed Yibo more hungrily. When Yibo was mere inches from Zhan, he made his way up Zhan’s body line slowly, dragging his hands up Zhan’s legs, nuzzling his face against Zhan’s inner thigh, biting at Zhan’s pants, making sure to grab some skin as he bit.

He heard Zhan hiss and paused in front of his hips. With both hands on Zhan’s ass, Yibo nuzzled his face into Zhan’s groin, tonguing his pants until there was a wet patch on the fabric outlining a now bulging erection.

Yibo stood up fully, his hands using Zhan’s hips for support, and pressed his body against Zhan, lips hovering over Zhan’s trembling lips only for a brief second before he threw his head back, exposing his neck to Zhan.

He swayed side to side with the beat, grinding down on Zhan, whose breath was getting heavier with each passing second. He swiveled his body around and brought his lips close to Zhan’s ear, leaving a bite on the soft lobe.

Before Zhan could react, Yibo turned his body around abruptly and placed Zhan’s hand on his hips with a slap, in time with the beat. Yibo bent forward and pushed his ass up against Zhan’s dick, grinding into it. He pressed Zhan’s hands harder into his hips and backed up further into Zhan’s erection. 

Zhan felt his nerves tingle all over and all his blood rushed south. He tightened his hold on Yibo, digging his fingers into the leather. Slowly, he moved his hips in time with Yibo and the music. As he felt his erection grow harder, he thrust forward while pulling Yibo’s ass back into him.

He slipped one hand underneath Yibo’s see through shirt and ran it up his sweaty back before moving it around to Yibo’s chest. He slid it down towards his waist and knead into Yibo’s groin.

Yibo slapped Zhan’s hands away and stood up once again, turning around with a smirk. He walked backwards, stepping away from Zhan, stopping just out of his reach, slowly undoing one button at time, revealing his abs.

Zhan couldn't take it any more. He took a step forward only for Yibo to take another step back, his smirk growing wider and cockier. Zhan eyed Yibo thirstily as his shirt flew open, the last button finally undone. Yibo dropped to the ground and popped back up, swiveling his hips side to side. He dragged his thumb down his tongue and lower lip, continuing down his chest, leaving a shiny wet trail behind.

Zhan took another step forward and just as Yibo was about to take a step back again, he wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him flush against his chest roughly. Yibo gasped at the sudden aggression and moaned when Zhan grabbed his hair with the other hand, yanking his head back forcefully.

”Fuck, Bo-di,” Zhan growled as he moved his hips against Yibo’s once again.

He pulled Yibo’s face close to him and gulped again when he saw how aroused he looked. Zhan leaned forward and licked Yibo’s lower lip, slowly trailing down his jawline, down his neck. As he made his way to the shoulder, Zhan slid Yibo’s shirt off to one side, exposing the soft pale skin on his shoulder. 

Zhan wanted nothing more than to stain it red, to leave his mark on the flawless surface. He bit it with his teeth, causing Yibo to moan and hide his face in the crook of Zhan’s neck. He sucked on it till he had accomplished his goal. As he pulled back, a string of saliva still connecting his lips to the purple bruise, Yibo let out an erotic sigh and straightened up once more.

Yibo’s lips lingered mere inches from Zhan but he didn't give Zhan what he wanted just yet. Slowly, purposefully, he slid his shirt off his body, letting it fall to the floor. He dragged one leg up Zhan’s side, bending it at the knee. 

Instinctively, Zhan grabbed the back of Yibo’s knees and plastered him against his body, his mouth reaching for Yibo. But Yibo turned away before Zhan could reach his lips. Frustrated, Zhan latched onto Yibo’s neck and sucked on it till it turned as red as his shoulder. 

”I have a shoot in two days, ge,” Yibo breathed even as his erection got harder.

”I don't care,” Zhan spoke in a low growl, “Tell them your boyfriend gave you these bites. Tell them you’re mine.”

Yibo turned his face back and looked at Zhan with lustful eyes. He bit his lips, turned on by the idea of everyone knowing Xiao Zhan had marked him. As the music faded into the next song, Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo’s waist tighter and walked them to the bedroom.

As soon as he entered the room, he slammed the door shut and pushed Yibo up against the door.

”So...this is one of _your_ kinks?” Zhan smirked and bit Yibo’s lower lips, pulling on it until it could stretch no more.

”Dancing for you in heels?” Yibo blushed. “Maybe...I thought you’d like it.” 

”Are you kidding me? I’m so fucking horny for you right now,” Zhan pushed up harder against Yibo, lips hovering over his hungrily.

”Then fuck me till I can’t walk, Xiao Zhan.”

”Be careful what you ask for,” Zhan bit the air in front of Yibo’s lips.

Yibo thrust forward and grinded against Zhan, eliciting a whispered _fuck_ from him.

”Take your pants off,” Zhan glanced down, “but I want the heels on…,” he ran one hand up Yibo’s thigh and then cupped his ass.

Yibo placed a hand on Zhan’s chest and pushed him away, walking him back till he was sitting at the edge of the bed. He placed one foot on Zhan’s lap, digging his heels into Zhan’s thigh ever so lightly, and gestured towards the zip on it. Zhan grinned and unzipped the boots and yanked them off. He repeated the motion for the other boot and then watched as Yibo turned around while unzipping his pants.

He pulled the pants down his ass and bent forward, slipping them all the way down. Zhan couldn't help but smack Yibo’s ass as he stepped out of the pants and then proceeded to wear his heels once more. 

Zhan gasped when turned to face him, completely naked except for the tall black heels with a giant erection. He stood up and grabbed Yibo by the hair and finally, finally crashed his lips against Yibo.

In one swift motion he turned them around and pushed Yibo onto the bed. Before joining him, Zhan walked to a shelf and Yibo’s eyes widened when he saw Zhan pull out a camera. He pointed it at Yibo and Yibo felt himself flush all over his body.

_Click._

Zhan proceeded to place the camera on a tripod and pointed it to the bed. Yibo blushed harder as he heard the tap of a button and saw a red light turn on. Zhan walked towards the bed, undressing, and was naked by the time he was on top of Yibo.

”Are you ready, didi?” Zhan said in a sickeningly sweet tone.

Yibo gulped as he felt something deep inside him tremble under Zhan’s intense gaze. He nodded, breathing heavily.

Zhan dove in for a kiss but before sealing his lips on Yibo, he paused and let his tongue drag ever so slowly across his lips.

”And the safe word...is red.”


	126. I'll reward you if you're a good boy

* * *

”Ge…”

”Say it, didi,” Zhan bit Yibo’s lower lip. “What’s the safe word, sweetie?”

”Re...red,” Yibo’s lips trembled in anticipation.

”And yellow if you want me to slow down…okay?”

Yibo nodded eagerly.

”Good boy,” Zhan patted Yibo’s cheek and smiled.

On seeing Yibo’s innocent expression, something primal stirred inside Zhan.

“Do you trust me?”

”Always,” came Yibo’s steadfast, unhesitant response.

”I love you so much, Wang Yibo,” Zhan whispered in a low voice. 

”I love you too,” Yibo smiled shyly and surrendered himself as soon as Zhan’s lips were on his.

Zhan kissed Yibo gently, massaging his lips patiently, caressing his cheeks softly, lapping against his tongue slowly. He kept going until he felt Yibo’s body relax under his touch.

When he was convinced Yibo was comfortable, he stepped off the bed and walked to his closet. Yibo watched curiously as Zhan rummaged through his things and finally pulled out two items.

Yibo’s eyes widened and his heart began thumping harder when he saw one of the items. 

”I…,” Zhan seemed to hesitate but then took one look at Yibo’s naked form and extended legs ending in the deadly heels and his eyes darkened. “I want to handcuff you.”

Yibo felt his breaths growing heavier. He nodded slowly and held his wrists before Zhan could even ask him to. Yibo sat on his knees and waited patiently as Zhan walked over, holding his gaze firmly.

Zhan placed one finger on Yibo’s chin and tilted his face up. 

”You’re such a good boy for me, Bo-di...so...submissive…”

Yibo gulped as his mind began wrapping itself around Zhan’s words and succumbing to his desire. Zhan kissed Yibo’s wrists repeatedly before putting the handcuffs on and locking them in place.

”How does that feel, sweetie?” Zhan stroked the back of Yibo’s hand.

”Go..good,” Yibo exhaled, his entire body revelling in the thrill of the sensation.

”Good...because these are going to stay on the entire time,” Zhan smirked.

Yibo peeked at the other object Zhan held discreetly behind his back.

”Curious, are we?” Zhan chuckled and held Yibo’s chin in place. “Do you want to see what I’ve got in my other hand?”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded doe-eyed.

”I’ll reward you if you’re a good boy, didi…will you do whatever I ask you to do?”

Yibo nodded enthusiastically.

”Good,” Zhan climbed onto the bed and sat against the headboard. “Suck my dick.”

Yibo could feel his entire mouth fill up with saliva and his dick getting wet with pre cum on hearing the authority in Zhan’s voice. It made him want to kneel in front of Zhan and do anything and everything he commanded him to do. It made him feel safe and secure letting Zhan take the reins. It made him aroused and alive in a way he never had felt before.

”Hurry up, puppy...I need you to suck on my dick. Now.” Zhan growled the last words.

Yibo hurried and lay between Zhan’s legs. He stretched his arms over his head and rested them against Zhan’s stomach so that his mouth lined up with Zhan’s dick.

Yibo was in awe of the confidence with which Zhan lay back, ready for Yibo’s mouth. He nuzzled against Zhan’s dick, burying his face in its warmth. He licked the pre cum off and made sure Zhan was watching him as he did it. He tongued the slit and felt the satisfaction of doing a good job when Zhan groaned and threw his head back against the bed.

Yibo sucked at the head and released it each time with a pop. He slid his mouth down Zhan’s length until he had bottomed out, taking him all the way in. By now, Yibo had grown adjusted to how long Zhan was and he knew all his weak spots. He began working his tongue around and hitting every sweet spot, eliciting moan after moan from Zhan.

He itched to use his hands but could only dig them into Zhan’s skin as the handcuffs held them close together, tightly. He began sucking Zhan off at a fervent pace, deep groans resonating at the back of his throat.

”That’s enough,” Zhan’s voice interrupted Yibo’s rhythm. “Sit up.”

Yibo stopped immediately and did as he was told. One look at Zhan’s flushed face and Yibo felt a wave of arousal spread through his body. In that moment all he wanted was to touch Zhan all over. But he couldn't. All he could do was wait. And there was a strange pleasure in that, he found.

”Good boy, didi...here...look…”

Zhan held out his hand and slowly opened his palm. In it, much to Yibo’s astonishment, was a plug. An anal plug. Yibo’s eyes widened as he realized what Zhan wanted.

”Still okay, sweetie?” Zhan sat up on his knees as well and brushed aside a strand of Yibo’s hair.

”Mmm,” Yibo nodded almost pleadingly.

Pleased, Zhan reached out for the nightstand and grabbed the bottle of lube. He moved behind Yibo and spread a generous amount on his fingers and the plug.

"Get on all fours, puppy.”

Yibo immediately bent forward and rested his elbows on the bed. His hands, still bound together, had started to feel the friction of the handcuffs as they rubbed against the bed.Zhan began massaging one finger into Yibo and then another one followed soon after. He scissored Yibo open and when he found Yibo’s spot, Yibo felt himself go weak all over and fall forward barely able to hold his own weight.

He tried steadying himself and had barely managed to get back up on his elbows when Zhan pulled his fingers out and attacked him with his tongue. He fucked into Yibo repeatedly, sucking, nibbling, over and over again until Yibo was a hot, writing mess.

When he was satisfied, Zhan spread more lube on the toy and slowly, carefully began inserting it into Yibo.

”You’re doing so good, puppy,” Zhan whispered soothingly as Yibo began whimpering with the pressure and weight of the plug inside him. “So good…you look like a fucking vision...my beautiful boyfriend...mine...all mine.” 

”All yours,” Yibo moaned when the plug settled in, finding its place inside Yibo’s body.

Zhan massaged Yibo’s ass a few times, causing Yibo to moan louder as the plug moved around and touched every corner inside him. If Yibo thought he had reached the top of the peak, he was wrong. 

”Lie down,” Zhan’s voice ordered.

As soon as Yibo had lied down, Zhan reached for the handcuffs and unlocked them for the briefest of moments before latching them onto one of the grills in the headboard.

His eyes darkened as he watched Yibo lay in front of him, helpless and drowning in ecstasy. With a smirk, Zhan reached for another object that lay on the edge of the bed that Yibo hadn't noticed. It was black and small, barely the size of Zhan’s little finger.

”Do you know what this is, didi?” Zhan’s smirk grew wider.

Yibo shook his head slowly, his eyes wide and curious.

Zhan raised the object up and Yibo heard a click. Almost immediately, Yibo felt something in him jerk to life. 


	127. Because you weren't ready

* * *

A helpless and positively erotic moan escaped Yibo's lips as he shut his eyes tight.

”Ge…,” Yibo exclaimed.

”No talking...not a tiny sound, didi...I want you to remain silent as a mouse...understood?”

Yibo looked at Zhan, desperate for more. He nodded furiously and curled his lips inward as if to show Zhan he understood his instructions. With another smirk, Zhan pressed the button again and breathed heavily as Yibo squirmed as much as was possible with him tied up, and bit his lip in an attempt not to scream.

Zhan crawled on top of Yibo and increased in the intensity of the vibrations and watched every inch of Yibo’s face as the plug throbbed inside Yibo mercilessly. He kept repeating the action, driving Yibo to the edge of insanity each time before reeling him back in.

”Fuck, Bo-di,” Zhan watched Yibo with lust filled eyes. “Fuck...you’re a vision…”

Spurred on by Zhan’s words, Yibo began inching towards his climax once again. Zhan increased the intensity and frequency of the vibrations until he could see Yibo biting into his lips and drawing blood. He knelt down between Yibo’s legs and hovered over Yibo’s twitching and painfully hard erection.

”Bo-di…,” Zhan breathed.

Yibo opened his eyes and looked at Zhan, panting and flushed. He gulped as he saw Zhan’s tongue make its way to his dick. 

”Come for me, didi,” Zhan mouthed before licking Yibo’s dick clean of its pre cum.

Yibo came undone as Zhan licked him once more while simultaneously pushing the vibrations up to their hilt. His hands fought to break free and grab on to something, grab on to Zhan, grab on to anything. He came like he had never come before. He came all over Zhan’s beautiful smirking face. He came warm, fast and loudly as he let all his pent up emotions out. 

”Zhan-ge!!!!” Yibo screamed as his climax was prolonged by the now gentle vibrations.

Zhan massaged Yibo’s thighs through it all. He placed kisses along his skin until he could feel his entire body go limp. When he was sure Yibo was done, he took out a tissue from the nightstand drawer and wiped his face down along with Yibo’s stomach. 

After several seconds, when Yibo finally opened his eyes, he found Zhan gazing at him lovingly. Yibo couldn't believe this was the same face that had eyed him like a piece of meat and ordered him to suck his dick and watched him lustfully as he writhed under his control. 

He managed a smile back when Zhan’s face filled up with his familiar radiant smile. 

”Didi,” Zhan whispered. “How’re you feeling?”

”Like I’ve died and gone to heaven and now an angel is staring down at me,” Yibo whispered back.

Zhan grinned and reached up to unlock the handcuffs.

”Ahh,” Yibo groaned as he brought his hands down and rotated his wrists.

”Does it hurt?”

”Worth it…,” Yibo replied immediately before Zhan could worry. “So totally fucking worth it.”

Zhan leaned forward and kissed the bruises on Yibo’s wrist.

”Good thing I have tomorrow off,” Yibo chuckled. “And it’s a good thing I’m going to be in full sleeves for the fanmeet day after…”

Zhan kissed Yibo's lips tenderly as he reached behind and slowly, carefully pulled the plug out.

Yibo flinched and hugged Zhan tightly as his body adjusted back to normal.

”Fuck...do you have any idea how much I fucking love you, Wang Yibo,” Zhan sighed and lay down beside Yibo, wrapping one around his chest to pull him closer.

”Yes, but tell me again,” Yibo smirked.

”I love you so much it hurts...I love you like I’ve never loved before…”

”Me too,” Yibo smiled shyly.

”Did it...did it feel good?” Zhan’s eyes searched Yibo’s face.

”I didn't know I would enjoy something like this...Zhan-ge...you surprise me everytime...never thought your list would be so...deadly.”

Zhan blushed and hid his face in the crook of Yibo’s neck.

”Only with you,” he whispered and kissed Yibo’s cheek. “Only with you.”

”Can I ask you something, ge?”

”Hmm…”

”Why now?”

”Because you weren’t ready. But now that you did...you took the initiative to do what you did earlier...I knew you were ready.”

”Hmm,” Yibo felt the warmth from Zhan’s words spread through his chest. “I love you too, ge...I trust you...blindly...but now,” Yibo sat up and rolled on top of Zhan, “it’s your turn…”

”No...this was for you…,” Zhan sat up and hugged Yibo who was now straddling him. “We can do me next time.”

”Are you sure?”

”It felt so fucking good watching you...controlling you...doing that to you,” Zhan bit his lip as he cupped Yibo’s face in his hands. “It was just as good for me...you’re so beautiful, Bo-di...and...I can watch this whenever I want,” Zhan pointed to the camera.

Yibo blushed hard as he remembered that Zhan had filmed the whole thing.

”Can’t wait to see what it looks like,” Zhan smirked.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo exclaimed and hid his face in Zhan’s chest.

* * *

As they lay in bed later that night, Zhan was lost in his thoughts.

_This is for life. I’ve found my life partner. This is forever._

”Ge?” Yibo wrapped himself around Zhan and snuggled closer. 

”Bo-di…,” Zhan smiled.

”Ge…,” Yibo whispered back.

__

”Bo-di…”

__

”What are you thinking?”

__

”Don’t ever leave me…”

__

”Why would you even think that?” Yibo placed his fingers on Zhan’s lips gently. “I could never...no matter what…”

__

”Promise?”

__

”Promise…”

__

”No matter how stupid I am?”

__

”No matter how stupid you are,” Yibo chuckled.

__

”You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” Zhan felt his emotions begin to overflow.

__

”And you’re always so sappy after we do stuff,” Yibo grinned and placed a kiss on Zhan’s cheek.

__

”I just...I...I just can’t lose you…”

__

”You won't…”

__

”Hmm,” Zhan smiled and cuddled Yibo closer. “Good. Because you...this...this is for life. I’ve found my life partner.”

__

Yibo felt a shiver run down his spine. His entire body responded to Zhan’s words and he felt an intense happiness wash over him.

__

”Me too, Zhan-ge. This is forever.”

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now we're finally at the beginning of all the fun Untamed promotion events starting with the fanmeet! So much amazing material to dive into!!! But I may not go into the details of every event...instead I'll focus on a side plot that unfolds as they're going through all the events and interviews.


	128. What am I going to do with you?

* * *

”What?”

”I said...when did you move to this new apartment? And why didn't I know about it?”

”Why would you need to know about it?”

”Because I’m your manager.”

”The only people who need to know are my parents and my driver.”

”Why did you move?”

”It’s none of your business but if you must know, it’s the same reason as anyone else...I liked the apartment and the location.”

”Are you sure there isn't any other reason?”

”Yes, there is no other reason!”

”Don't think I haven't noticed…”

”Haven't noticed what?”

The manager, a currently angry looking woman in her mid thirties, hesitated for a brief moment before lifting Yibo’s wrist and scrubbing the makeup off with her thumb.

”This.” She gestured towards the faint reddish bruises around Yibo’s wrist.

”I got injured in a game. So what?” Yibo maintained his poker face and kept his voice as neutral as possible.

”What kind of game?”

”Can you stop acting like you’re my mom. It’s none of your business. And anyway,” Yibo huffed, “what does this have to do with my work?!”

”It is my business when my client is acting recklessly, suddenly moving to a new apartment that’s 45 minutes farther away and showing up to work with marks on his neck and wrists!” She threw her hands in the air and looked at Yibo, bewildered and frustrated.

Yibo remained silent.

”Who is she?” She spoke after a long pause that hung heavy between them.

”Who?”

”The girl you’re seeing…”

”There is no girl,” Yibo replied monotonously but couldn't help but smirk inwardly.

”Don't lie to me, Wang Yibo.”

”I’m not!” Yibo stood up finally and matched her tone. “There is no girl, I am not acting recklessly, I am not an idol anymore, those rules don’t apply to me now, and I am NOT a child.”

”What am I going to do with you?!” She sat down in the chair and let out a long sigh.

”You’re going to manage my professional commitments. And I will make sure I don't jeopardize my career. You have nothing to worry about. Don't interfere in my personal life. Please.” Yibo looked at her straight and spoke matter-of-factly.

”Whatever is going on,” she returned Yibo’s stare, “better not get in the way of your career. You know how this industry works. You know how influential your fan base can be. And you know how possessive and protective they are of their stars.”

”I know how the industry works. I don't care about the irrational behavior of these fake fans. I never have. You know that. The true fans like me for who I am. Someone who doesn’t talk much, who doesn’t share his personal life, who doesn’t do a lot of fanservice…”

”Okay, okay,” she groaned and dragged one hand down her face. “I get it. I get it. But I’ve got my eyes on you, Yibo.”

Yibo sat back down and they proceeded with the meeting, working out his schedule for Legend of Fei, his upcoming short film for the mid autumn festival, magazine shoots, and brand endorsements.

”Are you still serious about launching your own brand of skateboards?”

”Yes.”

”If we plan on releasing it by the end of this month, we need to get our shit together. We need to design the logo...you’ve already identified who you want to work with on the skateboards, right?”

”Yes, some of the boys from One more try are interested in the project and have some great ideas. And I also know who…”

”Great!” She interrupted. “Now I need to figure out marketing and designing the logo...I can have some designers lined up by the end of the week and you can…”

”I already have a designer too.”

”Oh, great! Wow. Who?”

”A friend. He worked...works as a designer and I like his work. He gets my style.”

”Perfect! Who is this? Do I know him? Show me his portfolio.”

”I don't think that’s necessary,” Yibo maintained a firm tone despite his nervousness. “I can just show you his designs for my brand logo.”

”Wang Yibo...that’s ridiculous...we can't just…”

”Why not? All we care about is the logo...who cares who draws it...he doesn’t want to be...he prefers to remain anonymous. He doesn’t want any limelight.”

Yibo’s manager narrowed her eyes on him but Yibo didn't change his stoic expression. She decided against pursuing the argument and filed it away for later. 

”Fine. Get me his designs by the end of the week. I’ll handle marketing and PR.”

”Hmm.” Yibo nodded.

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Guess what?  
>   
>  Yibo: What?  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Guess, Bo-di!!  
>   
>  Yibo: You love me even more today than you did yesterday?_ 😏  
>   
>  _Zhan-ge: Bo-di!_ 😐 _  
>   
> Zhan-ge: And yes, I do_ 😘 _  
>   
> Yibo: Aww_ 😘 _  
>   
> Yibo: Okay, now tell me, ge!  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: I got another drama...and this is a big one!!  
>   
>  Yibo: Wow! What?!?! Wow!!! Ge! Congratulations. Which..who..what?  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: It’s called Oath of love and it’s with Yang Zi!  
>   
>  Yibo: Wow, ge! You’re on a roll! Two dramas in the pipeline and a big movie releasing soon!!  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: It’s going to be okay after all…  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Oh, I’m possibly maybe going to be the brand ambassador for Braun!  
>   
>  Yibo: Ge...it’s all coming together...everyone is sitting up and taking notice of my ge!  
>   
>  Yibo: I told you so _😏  
>   
>  _Zhan-ge: Yes, you did  
>   
>  Yibo: I love you _😘 _  
>   
> Zhan-ge: I love you too, didi  
>   
>  Yibo: I’m so ready for the fanmeet!   
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Yeah! The whole cast is going to be together!  
>   
>  Yibo: Yeah..I’ll see you there in a few hours?  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Yep!_

Yibo kept his phone aside and stared at himself in the mirror while his team fussed over his hair and makeup. His mind kept going over his conversation with his manager earlier.

_Gotta be more careful. But it’ll be fine. What’s one more person we have to hide our relationship from._ He shook his head.

”Yibo!” His makeup lady clucked her tongue. “Don’t move!”

”Sorry, jiejie,” Yibo grinned.

”Now turn that way...I need to,” she leaned in and lowered her voice, “...cover this mark.”

Yibo froze and felt his entire body heat up with embarrassment as he noticed a faint purple spot on his neck.

”No wonder you seem happier lately,” she whispered and patted his shoulder.

”I do?” Yibo tilted his head as he looked at her reflection in the mirror.

”Hmm,” she nodded and gazed back at him through the mirror with a kind smile. “Happier and lighter than I’ve seen you in a while.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This skateboard brand announced itself in July 2019 and most people were convinced it's Yibo -
> 
> https://www.instagram.com/mm_____official/
> 
> Full video for the first Untamed fanmeet - 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lr_CPwDBlgk&t=1292s


	129. Guess my favorite number

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimers:  
> 1\. I do not speak Chinese so none of the lip reading is verified by me.  
> 2\. I am interpreting the videos and their behavior based on the fandoms' analysis and my own imagination.  
> 3\. I have rephrased the english translations of the fanmeet to sound more natural as english dialogs.
> 
> To situate us, we are on July 12, 2019.

* * *

Zhan arrived at the venue after Yibo. As he made his way to the entrance of the venue to join the rest of the boys, his ears perked up when he heard distant noises. He turned the corner and stopped in his tracks when he saw a crowd of people right in front of the venue entrance. 

”What’s going on?” Zhan asked his assistant.

”I think...I think they’re here for…,” she began replying.

”XIAO ZHAN!!!!!” The crowd erupted into screams and cheers. 

”You.” The assistant finished her sentence.

Zhan’s eyes widened as he realized that the crowd was indeed there for him and was now making their way towards him. In the past, Zhan would be surrounded by ten or twenty fans when he went out or was at the airport. But this time, his mind reeled as he counted at least forty, maybe even fifty people, all mostly girls. 

Zhan turned around and looked around and behind himself just to be sure. There was no one else.

_I’m sure they were here for Yibo and the others too._

As he shook his initial shock off and put on a smile, walking towards the entrance, the signs and posters they were carrying slowly became clearer to the short sighted man. Zhan’s eyes widened again when he saw that each and everyone of them had his name and face on it.

”Xiao Zhan!” One girl squealed in delight.

”We love you, Zhan-Zhan!” Another girl cheered him on as he walked past her.

Jaiyou!” Yet another one screamed at him enthusiastically.

Zhan smiled, waved, bowed, still unable to believe that these many people were here just for him.

”I love you, Wei Ying!”

”Wangxian forever!!!!”

”Wei Wuxian, you’re so handsome!!”

”Yiling Laozu for life! Go grandmaster!!”

Those words finally snapped Zhan out of his daze and he beamed brightly as it sunk in that the Untamed really was responsible for this sudden rise in his fan following. He straightened his posture and smiled shyly as he entered the venue. As the doors closed behind him and the sounds faded, Zhan finally could feel his heart thumping in his chest.

* * *

”What took you so long?” Yibo asked in a worried tone when he saw Zhan enter the waiting area backstage.

”Sorry...I kind of...took some time to get into the venue.”

”Why?”

”There was a crowd outside...took some time to walk through them.”

”Crowd? Didn't you use the back entrance?”

”No,” Zhan pursed his lips. “I didn't know there was one...I just always use the front entrance.”

”Ah! Zhan-ge,” Yibo grinned and patted Zhan’s arm. “Now that you’re even more famous, you’ll get hounded if you use the regular entrance.” Yibo leaned closer and covered his mouth as he whispered. “You should use the back entrance. It’ll feel so good.” Yibo’s voice purred.

”Bo-di!” Zhan’s eyes darted about and he pushed Yibo away with a smack. 

Yibo cackled and clapped his hands together seeing Zhan blush.

”Hi,” he said finally when his laughter died down.

”Hey,” Zhan smiled back, eyes now soft and affectionate.

”Okay, you two,” Haikuan walked over and lowered his voice. “You need to tone down the lovey dovey eyes and dopey grins for the next few hours.”

”Oh,” Zhan straightened himself and cleared his throat on hearing Haikuan’s words. “Yeah...you’re right.”

”Good luck to you both as well,” Yibo smirked and winked at Haikuan whose eyes widened slightly before grinning and shaking his head.

* * *

The event started off awkward and bumpy but eventually flowed more smoothly thanks to the natural dynamics between the boys, especially Zhan and Yibo. As the male leads, they were the center of attention and were constantly either being asked questions or being made to do different activities and enactments.

After Yibo had finished performing a short freestyle bit on the request of the host and the fans, Zhan watched him walk back to his seat, eyes filled with pride and awe.

”Wow!” Zhan exclaimed and shook his head in wonder. “So cool!”

When it was his turn to display his talents, he nearly fainted when the host asked him to dance as well, much to Yibo’s amusement. Everyone giggled as Zhan stuttered nervously, repeatedly saying how bad he was at dancing and asking if there was anything else he could do. Finally, when given the option, Zhan stood up confidently and declared that he would sing.

As he walked up to sing Kepler by his favorite artist, Stefanie Sun, his mind thought of all the times he and Yibo stared at the stars together, humming the song. He felt a shiver down his spine when he turned around and saw Yibo’s eyes on him. 

Yibo watched, partly in awe and partly with overflowing love, as Zhan lifted each note and placed it gently in its correct position in the melody’s constellation. Zhan’s voice was soothing and pure. When he was done singing, Yibo thought he heard Zhan mix up the last few words.

_Did he swap the words on purpose?_ Yibo thought. _Isn’t it I am a lonely star and not I love a lonely star?_

When Zhan walked back with a wide grin on his face, Yibo threw him a questioning look and when Zhan’s grin grew even wider, Yibo knew Zhan had done it on purpose. He felt a warmth spread through his body and he looked down at his lap, shaking his head and smiling.

* * *

”Stay calm, didi...don't do this...just ignore it and say I’m thin...big deal!”

”How can he say things like that?” Yibo frowned while trying to keep his voice at a low volume.

”It’s okay...let it go,” Zhan shook his head and laughed.

Yibo nodded and tried to push his irritation away.

_How dare the host say Zhan-ge has a very thin waist. He doesn’t know how hard we have worked and how much of a toll it took on Zhan-ge’s health and weight. If I had my way, I’d tell him off even more! But I need to control myself. I can't embarrass Zhan-ge. Sometimes he’s too good for his own good._ Yibo softened a little at the thought. _But that’s what I love about him. He’s so kind and considerate._

A few minutes later, when the host directed the question towards their dynamics on set and how they are considered to be the most disruptive because of their interactions, both smiled and demonstrated what they really do with full enthusiasm. They began smacking and hitting each other as they used to on set.

”Keep going,” the host smirked when they were done. “I could keep staring at your cuteness…”

The audience erupted into laughter and screams as Zhan and Yibo suddenly felt their faces heat up. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't control their blushes and immediately looked away from each other and looked down in an attempt to regain their composure.

Zhan cleared his throat and tried to move past it but Yibo kept his face down, unable to recover. When Zhan looked in his direction, Yibo kept his gaze directed away from Zhan.

_He looks so cute when he’s blushing. If this is all we need to do in the name of fan service, I’m all for it!_ Zhan thought. _God, I wanna kiss him so bad._

As if sensing his thoughts, Yibo turned to Zhan and gave him a discreet warning glare. Zhan grinned and looked back at the host.

* * *

When it was time to play the pushing game to demonstrate their martial art reflexes, Zhan and Yibo watched excitedly as Haikuan and Zanjin remained on the podium, facing each other. To their surprise, it seemed like Zanjin was going to win when Haikuan’s balance wavered until Zanjin, on reflex, reached out and grabbed Haikuan by the waist to prevent him from falling.

Both Zhan and Yibo and eventually Yubin, widened their eyes and ducked their heads to hide their astonished smirks. Zhan and Yibo leaned in and giggled as Zanjin flushed and looked around nervously while Haikuan tried to maintain a neutral expression.

”Wow...so that really happened!” Yibo murmured.

”Yeah...you two better behave when we have to go up there,” Yubin smirked.

”And you better keep your hands off my ge,” Yibo pursed his lips and stared at Yubin.

”Stop it, Yibo,” Zhan chuckled. “It’s all in the name of fun and fan service.”

Much to Yibo’s relief, Yubin was the one who fell off the podium first and it was him against Zhan. As their round progressed, Zhan’s competitive streak began emerging.

_He’s so hot when he gets aggressive.Fuck, I want him to pin me against a wall and have his way with me._

When Zhan glanced at Yibo, he could see a familiar expression on his face. One of want and desire. Zhan gulped as he felt the expression go straight to his dick.

_Fuck, I wish he wasn't looking at me like that._ Zhan groaned inwardly. _The rest of promotions are going to be so hard if we can’t control our looks and behaviour around each other. But maybe we can pass it off as fan service._ Zhan smirked.

* * *

At the end of the event, they all joined hands and bowed to the wonderful fans who had showed up. Yibo felt giddy when Zhan held his hand but frowned a little because the mic got in the way of them intertwining their fingers. 

When they straightened up again and left each other’s hands, Yibo noticed Zhan giggling and saw that Yubin was still holding on to Zhan’s hand. Zhan moved the mic and untangled his hand away even as Yubin and him giggled at the situation.

Yibo, on the other hand, wasn't amused. His glare went unnoticed as Yubin continued to chuckle with Zhan.

Once backstage, Yibo waited in one corner for the two of them to walk over and then shoved himself between the two. Zhan rolled his eyes and shook his head.

”What happened now, didi?” Zhan leaned in and whispered.

”He held onto your hand longer than necessary,” Yibo pouted and scrunched his eyebrows.

Zhan chuckled and nudged him playfully.

”Hey,” Zhan spoke softly. “Guess my favorite number..”

Yibo raised an eyebrow in confusion.

”What?”

Zhan leaned in closer and covered his mouth as he whispered his favorite number.

”5 2 0.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Untamed fanmeet -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lr_CPwDBlgk&feature=youtu.be&t=1547 
> 
> Yibo dance - 25:20  
> Zhan’s turn - 27:45  
> Host’s comment on Zhan’s waist - 40:00  
> Host teasing Yizhan - 42:40  
> Haikuan and Zan Jin moment - 49:15  
> Yizhan pushing game with Yubin - 54:30
> 
> Yibo reacts to thin waist comment on Zhan -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VuGnA41iTmA 
> 
> Yizhan Untamed fanmeet full fancam -
> 
> Yizhan Yubin reaction to Haikuan-Zanjin moment -  
> https://youtu.be/qHGArjLi0Kc?t=2738 
> 
> Yizhan reaction to host teasing them -  
> https://youtu.be/qHGArjLi0Kc?t=2368
> 
> Zhan zsww moment -  
> https://youtu.be/qHGArjLi0Kc?t=3833
> 
> Yibo following Zhan -  
> https://youtu.be/qHGArjLi0Kc?t=4042
> 
> Yubin left Zhan’s hand a little late, Yibo reaction -  
> https://youtu.be/qHGArjLi0Kc?t=4488
> 
> In chinese, the numbers 520 are pronounced as “Wǔ'èr líng” which sounds similar to “Wo ai ni” which means I love you.


	130. It's crazy

* * *

Yibo blushed and smiled back at Zhan.

”5 2 0 too, ge…,” he whispered but was cut-off mid sentence as they heard a crowd some distance away.

”How did these people get here...this is the back entrance!?” Yibo exclaimed as his bodyguard began encircling him.

”Wow, didi...I can't believe this happens to you wherever you go...this is crazy,” Zhan frowned.

”I’m going to go out first,” Yibo spoke with finality. “Everyone come staggered after that...it’s the safest way otherwise they’ll go crazy.”

Zhan nodded and sighed. He watched as the crowd went bezerk as Yibo stepped out.

_This is ridiculous. No wonder he can't go anywhere any more...can't believe this is how his life has been since he was a teen._

Zhan felt a protective emotion rush through him and his breath almost hitched when he saw one fan try and reach out for Yibo. He breathed a sigh of relief when the bodyguard stepped between them and quickly guided Yibo into the van. 

As his assistant left him for her own car along with the hair and make up staff, Zhan’s phone pinged and he took it out of his pocket.

> _Bo-di: I’ll see you at home, ge.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Love you_😘 

Zhan grinned and stepped out as he began typing a reply. He looked up to watch his step and he neared the crowd and smiled and nodded at the fans.

”Xiao Zhan!!!” He heard his name ring through the crowd several times and couldn't help but blush at the declarations of love thrown his way.

Very soon, though, the crowd began encroaching his personal space. He felt them jostle a bit to get closer and began panicking when he felt himself being enclosed on all sides, without leaving a path for him to walk to his car.

Zhan’s driver rushed out and pushed through the mess of bodies that were chanting Zhan’s name and managed to reach for his shoulders and wrap an arm around him, guiding him to the car. Just as Zhan was about to enter the vehicle, he felt someone grab onto his arm and flinched a little as the person’s nails dragged against his wrist as he was yanked away by the driver.

* * *

”Zhan-ge?”

”Yeah, I’m home…”

Yibo walked out of the bedroom and rushed towards Zhan to wrap him in a hug. He immediately enveloped his lips and could feel Zhan smiling against his lips.

”I wanted to do this so bad during the fanmeet,” Yibo murmured as he kissed Zhan’s neck.

He slid his hands down Zhan’s back, around his waist and pulled him closer. He grabbed Zhan’s wrists that were still hanging by his sides and lifted them up to place them around his back when Zhan let out a meek yelp.

”Ahh,” Zhan flinched and withdrew his hand from Yibo.

”What happened?” Yibo took a step back. “Did I hurt you?”

”I just...have a scratch,” Zhan muttered.

Yibo lifted his wrists carefully once again and pushed up Zhan’s sleeves. He gasped as he saw scratches on one of them and some dried up blood.

”What the hell happened?”

”It was crazy,” Zhan frowned. “The crowd got a little rough and my driver had to come out to escort me to the car. It was so embarrassing!”

”Embarrassing?” Yibo grit his teeth. “You’re worried about that? You could have gotten hurt, ge...I can't believe a fan got this rowdy with you!!”

”It’s okay...nothing too serious happened.”

”They crossed a line, ge….they actually physically manhandled you...that’s it,” he walked to the dining table and picked up his phone. “I’m going to tell one of my bodyguards to escort you now on.”

”Bo-di,” Zhan rushed to his side and pulled the phone from him. “No, I can't borrow your bodyguards and cars and all forever. I’ll handle this.”

”How?” Yibo frowned.

”I’ve decided to launch my own studio. It’ll take a few months but I will start by assembling my team. I need a manager, I already have an assistant, and need to get my staff - hair and makeup and a bodyguard.”

”Are you sure that’s feasible for you right now...given the issues with Wajijiwa?”

”Yes, they’ve resumed paying me on time now that...I’m doing better...and probably because of the lawsuit.”

”Okay,” Yibo let out a long exhale. “Do that asap.”

”Yes, didi…”

”Get a bodyguard first before anything else like this happens again.”

”Yes, didi…”

”And let me know if you need any help in setting up the studio…”

”Yes, didi,” Zhan smiled fondly and pulled Yibo closer. “Now, kiss me again.”

* * *

Later that night, when they had wrapped up, Zhan sat against the headboard, reading a book and Yibo lay on the bed, resting his head on Zhan’s lap, scrolling through Weibo..

”Did you see this, ge...it’s crazy!” Yibo exclaimed.

”See what?” Zhan adjusted his glasses.

”Our fanmeet….it’s everywhere…and the show has crossed a billion views...and…”

”There’s more!?” Zhan’s eyes widened.

”And...people loved us together...they’re going crazy over our CP!” Yibo grinned.

”What!?” Zhan grabbed Yibo’s phone and scrolled. “Fuck. It’s everywhere...we’re trending.”

”And not just here, ge...internationally...the viewership is growing like crazy too!”

”You just got a text,” Zhan handed the phone to Yibo.

”It’s my manager,” Yibo sat up and a few seconds later began chuckling.

”What? What is it?”

”She is going bezerk over the response, especially for the fanmeet. She is asking us to _’keep up the fan service and chemistry’_....if only she knew!!”

Yibo laughed harder and flung himself at Zhan. He wrapped his arms around him and rolled on top, plastering himself on him. 

”I’m so happy, ge...now I can do whatever I want even in front of everyone and we can pass it off as fan service!”

”Not everything, you brat!” Zhan chuckled along and hugged Yibo.

”Yeah, yeah…,” Yibo snickered and tilted his head up to look at Zhan. “But I get to stare at you...smile at you...gaze at you...make you blush...accidentally touch you...low key flirt with you...

”But you don't get to do this,” Zhan smiled and leaned forward to place a kiss on Yibo’s lips.

”Mmm,” Yibo pouted.

”And you don't get to do this,” Zhan pulled Yibo closer and bit his lower lip with a smirk.

”Mmm,” Yibo’s pout began turning into an intense look. “What else can't we do?”

”This,” Zhan whispered as he licked Yibo’s lips. “And this,” he purred in Yibo’s ear as he tugged his shirt off. “And…”

”And what?” Yibo breathed heavily. 

”And what I’m about to do next…,” Zhan growled as he flipped them over and got on top of Yibo.

The rest of their night was filled with blissful moans, entangled limbs, heavy wet breaths, and writhing sweaty bodies. Neither could believe how happiness had found its way to them, neither could understand what strings of fate had bound them together, and neither cared to question the invisible forces at work. All that filled their minds, bodies, hearts, and souls was the immense sense of security that came with a love like theirs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> July 10th Sina interview. This happened before the fanmeet but I’m not covering it as part of the story plot. Enjoy!
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kklOWwcRLvA  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mF8fsHq_V74&list=WL&index=2&t=0s  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mn31877OkJ8&list=WL&index=3&t=0s  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkdXCch_JDQ&list=WL&index=5&t=0s


	131. This is going to be fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're now on July 14, 2019 for anyone keeping track and I'm so excited for the next few chapters. I loved every minute of writing them because I LOVE the TTXS brothers.

* * *

”Don’t be nervous.”

”How can I not? I have to get on that,” he pointed at the TV, “show and dance next to Wang Yibo in front of a live audience,” Zhan pouted and slouched on the couch.

Yibo smiled affectionately and cocked his head. He gazed at Zhan lovingly and with a long exhale, grabbed him by his hands and pulled him closer until his head was resting against Yibo’s chest.

”You’ll do fine...I’ve choreographed it so that it’s easy for you and I’ll match your steps...don't worry,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s head.

”Hmm,” Zhan nuzzled closer and sighed.

”I’ve got you,” Yibo murmured and placed more kisses on Zhan’s head, forehead and temple.

”Okay…,” Zhan whispered and smiled softly as they continued to watch the TTXS episode that was being aired.

Halfway through the episode with Ayunga and Yunlong, Zhan sat up abruptly and gawked at the TV. His eyes widened and jaw dropped as the episode aired the short video clip of Ayunga dancing in a skirt and heels.

”Bo-di!! Is this where you got the idea of wearing high heels and dancing for me from!??!” Zhan exclaimed and turned to Yibo, wide eyed and astonished.

Yibo grinned sheepishly and nodded. 

”I can't believe you, Bo-di! “

”But I did it way better,” Yibo replied smugly.

”Shut up! This is so embarrassing!”

”Why? You liked it...a lot from what I recall…,” Yibo smirked.

”Now I’ll have this image,” he pointed to the screen, “stuck in my head!”

”I can always do it again so you’ll only think of me,” Yibo straddled Zhan and blocked his view of the TV.

”I think I’ll need more than that,” Zhan massaged Yibo’s ass with a grin. “Much more than that.”

”Like what?” Yibo leaned forward and rubbed their noses together.

”Tell me your list.”

Yibo sat back, a little flustered.

”My...my list?” Yibo stuttered.

”Come on, didi...I know you have one by now,” Zhan continued to massage Yibo’s ass and smacked it gently.

Yibo blushed and hid his face in the crook of Zhan’s neck.

”Rowflah,” Yibo’s voice came out muffled and choked.

”What, sweetie?” Zhan pulled Yibo away and raised an eyebrow.

”Roleplay,” Yibo whispered, barely audible.

Zhan stilled for a moment and Yibo saw his eyes darken.

”What kind of roleplay,” Zhan prodded in a deep voice.

”How about,” Yibo leaned forward and nipped at Zhan’s ear, “I surprise you one of these days?”

”Sounds like a plan,” Zhan bared his teeth and dug them into Yibo’s neck eliciting an aroused sigh.

Zhan grabbed onto Yibo’s ass and flipped them around on the couch. He spread Yibo’s legs and lowered himself on Yibo, kneading into him. 

”Ge! We have an early morning tomorrow!” Yibo exclaimed even as he smiled widely.

”Well then, we better be quick about this,” Zhan growled and rolled his fully erect dick against Yibo.

* * *

”Don’t worry,” Yibo spoke in a low voice as they walked together down a hallway the next morning. “Today is just a rehearsal. You’ll be ready by the time we shoot tomorrow.”

”Okay,” Zhan shook his body loose and followed Yibo into a room at the end of the corridor.

”Yibo!” A cheery voice greeted them as soon as they entered. 

”Wei-ge!” Yibo grinned and leaned in for the hug Da Zhang Wei was coming in for.

”Oh and you brought our guest for tomorrow! Xiao Zhan, right?” Zhang Wei patted Zhan on the arm and smiled.

”Yes, hello Da-laoshi,” Zhan bowed and extended his hand. 

”Oh my god,” Da Zhang Wei placed a hand on his chest dramatically, “so much respect! Such a well behaved boy. Call me Wei-ge like Yibo, A-Zhan!” He gave Zhan a side hug.

”Oh...uhh...alright...thank you,” Zhan nodded and managed an embarrassed smile.

He led them further into the room which turned out to be connected to three other rooms.

”This is our dressing room and waiting area…,” he spread his arms wide and gestured to the space, “...and here is the one and only Han-ge!”

”Ah! Yibo!” Wang Han gave the boy a warm hug and then walked over to Zhan and bowed. “Nice to meet you again, Xiao Zhan.”

”Hello, Wang-laoshi,” Zhan bowed repeatedly, “You remember me?!”

”Of course! You were here with X-Nine weren’t you?”

”Yes...yes,” Zhan gave him a surprised smile. 

”You stood out from the rest even then,” Wang Han smiled affectionately and squeezed Zhan’s shoulder.

”Of course, he did!” Yibo chuckled mischievously. “Who can forget Zhan-ge’s radiant smile!” 

Da Zhang Wei did a double take while Wang Han took a moment to observe Yibo before resuming his polite smile. 

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan flustered and glared at the giggling boy. “Be kind, won't you.”

”I am being kind, ge...isn't it true, Han-ge?” Yibo laughed harder and looked at the old man. “Isn't that why he stood out?”

Wang Han shook his head in amusement and then proceeded to lightly pat Yibo’s cheeks.

”Yes, yes…”

”Wang-laoshi!” Zhan’s eyes widened. “Don't encourage him!”

”You can call me Han-ge too, A-Zhan,” Wang Han chuckled. “And I didn't know Yibo could be so naughty and playful,” he chuckled.

”Neither did I,” another voice added.

Everyone turned to see Qian Feng leaning against the doorway, smirking.

”Ah, there you are. We’ve been waiting,” Da Zhang Wei muttered.

”Sorry,” he bowed and then walked over to Yibo and Zhan. “I see our guest for tomorrow has arrived.”

”Hello, Qian-laosh…,” Zhan began but was interrupted.

”Feng-ge is fine, Zhan-Zhan!” Qian Feng patted his back, nearly making Zhan fall forward. “I’m so happy to _finally_ meet our dear Yibo’s special friend.”

Something in his tone made Yibo’s heart skip a beat and he bit his lips as he stole a glance at Qian Feng. He froze for a brief second when he realized Qian Feng had been looking at him and smirking all along.

”It’s nice to meet you too, Feng-ge,” an oblivious Zhan beamed brightly.

”This is going to be fun,” Qian Feng nodded and winked.

For the second time that day, Da Zhang Wei did a double take and Wang Han took a moment to observe Yibo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, the 14th july ttxs episode with ayunga and yunlong and the ayunga in heels clip -
> 
> https://youtu.be/ejv50I931uU?list=PLUM8x224JrX_kJm3syb7Fz2zoNP6J-N0N&t=2605
> 
> Sorry, if any of you want more smut where I leave it to the imagination but I've realized smut (I can't say lemon any more without dying of laughter...yes, Zaire121?) drains the fuck out of me (pun not intended)...and so I reserve the really detailed smut for what I've realized is sort of my comfort zone...kinky smut. Although I promise I will write all kinds of smut but I won't go into details every single time they do it because these two go at it like bunnies :P
> 
> And I hope you can see the dynamic in the TTXS as I write this subplot. I love them all so much! Hopefully, you also remember all the small moments that Qian Feng had with Yibo earlier on in this story. Also, I might exclude Gao Tianhe just because I don't know much about him and don't connect with him as much. No hate though!


	132. I'll prove it

* * *

”Good,” Yibo nodded at Zhan as he repeated the steps over and over again. “But in this one,” he walked over, “bend your body like this,” he placed his hands on Zhan’s waist and positioned him correctly.

”Got it,” Zhan nodded back, brows furrowed in concentration. 

Yibo looked around and leaned in for a quick second.

”You look so cute and hot right now, Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispered. “I just wanna kiss you senseless.”

”Yibo!” Zhan coughed and nudged him away. “Focus! And be careful...even though most of the crew isn't here...your brothers are not too far away!”

”I can't help it, ge,” Yibo smirked as he let go of Zhan and stood in front of him. “My boyfriend is so beautiful, I can't keep my hands off him.”

”Shhh!” Zhan smacked Yibo’s arm. “Bo-di!”

”What? Weren’t you the one who said it’d be hot to do it on set?”

”Uhhh,” Zhan blushed and looked away.

”Fuck, Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispered as he stepped the slightest bit closer. “You’re not making it easy to control myself right now.”

”Yibo,” Zhan gave him a warning glare. “Behave.” 

”Or what?” Yibo raised an eyebrow and smirked.

”Or...or…”

”I know you want it, sweetheart,” Yibo murmured.

”I…,” Zhan gulped as he glanced about cautiously.

”I can make your fantasy come true,” Yibo circled Zhan and whispered in his ear. “I know a place we can go,” he pulled his phone out and played the song once more.

”Let’s...let’s focus on the dance, Yibo…,” Zhan spoke with difficulty even as his mind filled with images of Yibo taking him in one corner of the set.

His body trembled as Yibo began moving beside him. He bit his lips as he imagined the risk they would be taking if he gave in to his desires. It sent a thrill through his body.

”Bo-di,” Zhan grit his teeth and regained his composure. “Focus.” He repeated and bared his teeth at Yibo in warning.

”Okay, okay...I’ll stop,” Yibo put his hands up in surrender “Let’s finish this choreography. You’re almost there!”

* * *

”Did you notice it too?” Da Zhang Wei mumbled to Qian Feng as they went over the episode script.

”So you saw it as well,” Qian Feng raised an eyebrow.

”Saw what?” Wang Han joined them, script in hand.

”No...nothing, Han-ge,” Da Zhang Wei flustered.

”Our little Yibo,” Qian Feng grinned and continued, “behaving differently…”

”All I saw was you behaving differently,” Wang Han rolled his eyes.

”What did I do?!” Qiang Feng exclaimed.

”What was with the weird looks and smirks when you greeted Zhan-Zhan and the _’This is going to be fun’_ comment?” Wang Han mimicked Qian Feng.

”That was because something’s up,” Qian Feng chuckled and turned to look in the direction of Yibo and Zhan. “I have been noticing it for a while now….months...Yibo has been…”

”What? Yibo has been what?” Wang Han followed his gaze.

”Lighter...happier...caught him smiling at himself and at his phone a few times…”

”I don't see anything abnormal in that,” Wang Han interrupted.

”I teased him a few times and he blushed,” Qian Feng offered and turned to face Wang Han.

”Of course, he would. You know he’s shy about such things. And how does Zhan-Zhan even figure into all of this?!”

”They seem...close...I’ve never seen Yibo so informal and comfortable….and close with someone,” Da Zhan Wei lowered his voice.

Wang Han observed the two boys who were going over the choreography in one corner. He tilted his head and squinted.

”Han-ge!” Da Zhang We scowled. “You’re not even wearing your glasses!”

”I don't see it,” Wang Han shrugged. “And not because I’m not wearing my specs.”

”I feel that something’s brewing between them,” Qian Feng smiled warmly. 

”Oh?” Wang Han looked surprised. “You think our Yibo is...gay?”

”I think our Yibo feels something for A-Zhan and we’re going to find out by the end of the shoot tomorrow! I’ll convince you Han-ge...I’ll prove it.” Qian Feng spoke with determination.

”Yes!” Da Zhang Wei nodded in support. “That’s our mission. You too, Wang Han. We need to confirm this once and for all!”

”Okay then,” Qian Feng stretched his hand out and gestured to the other men.

Da Zhang Wei placed his hand over Qian Feng’s and they both turned to look at Wang Han.

”Come on, ge,” Qian Feng encouraged the frowning man. “You know there’s a possibility. Don't tell me you didn't notice anything when Yibo was talking to Zhan, about Zhan, around Zhan?”

”Fine! Fine.” Wang Han put his hand on top of the pile and rolled his eyes.

”Great!” Da Zhang Wei smiled widely.

"Alright, gentlemen…mission Catch-Yibo-And-Zhan-Zhan is a go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Full episode (hopefully this link still works. it used to be on the day day up channel but now I can't find that video any more):  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76f4HmFXjuc
> 
> If you wanna smile like an idiot for some time -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8m4tAHkj56I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77dERELMrcc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqCIAxMV13c  
> https://youtu.be/UqCIAxMV13c?t=90  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gXB6W_lRD0  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7zHiGzKmn4  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ci2Y_ONJuYo
> 
> Also, sorry for the short chapter. And I won't post everyday this week as I normally do. Finals week is crazy!


	133. Stage one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more deadline to go and then I am done with this quarter!! Hope everyone is safe, healthy, and taking care of themselves.

* * *

”Is it just me or has Wei-ge been looking at us weirdly?” Zhan looked up from his phone and whispered to Yibo as a crew member adjusted the lighting for their practise performance.

Yibo glanced over and noticed Da Zhang Wei who was staring at them. As soon as he did so, though, Da Zhang Wei looked away almost immediately and pretended to be engrossed in his script.

”Hmm...not sure,” Yibo shrugged. 

”Okay,” Zhan looked back at his phone and went over the lyrics before their song rehearsal with the sound guy.

Da Zhang Wei breathed a sigh of relief.

”Time for stage one of the mission,” he whispered to himself and then tried his best to be casual as he made his way to Zhan and Yibo.

”There you two are!” he exclaimed in a shrill voice and then rolled his eyes at himself at the failed attempt at nonchalance.

”Uhh...where else would we be?” Yibo raised an eyebrow.

”Nowhere...nowhere,” he chuckled and then cleared his throat. “Zhan-Zhan, I had a question for you.”

”Yes, of course, ge,” Zhan smiled amicably.

 _Wow, that smile really is heart melting._ Da Zhang Wei thought. _If there really is something, I wouldn't blame Yibo! Heck, anyone would fall for the gorgeous smile._

”Are you single?”

Both Zhan and Yibo froze but Yibo recovered first.

”Ge!” Yibo exclaimed. “Isn't that a bit too personal?!”

”No, no...don't get me wrong...it’s just that if you are...I know someone here who may be interested...and perfect for you,” Da Zhang Wei wiggled his eyebrows with a cheeky grin.

Yibo gulped and tensed immediately. His first reaction was to yell _’Excuse fucking me? No one but me is perfect for my Zhan-ge’_ and hold Zhan closer. His next reaction was to give himself a reality check and bite his inner cheek in order to swallow the vinegar.

_What is going on? Is this just one of their usual attempts to tease and fluster me?!_

”Uhh…,” Zhan mumbled sheepishly. “I...no...I’m single, ge.”

Yibo felt a pang in his heart. He wanted to grab Zhan by the neck and seal their lips together and kiss him until he was dazed and breathless and then say _’Excuse fucking me? You are NOT single’_. But once again, better sense prevailed.

 _Gotta get used to this._ He sighed inwardly.

”Oh! Great! I have the perfect person for you then!”

”Who?” Yibo gave Da Zhang Wei an unimpressed look, ready to react to the obvious attempt at teasing him.

”One of our crew members has a huge crush on you!” Da Zhang Wei beamed.

Yibo blinked. His mouth was open and then closed and then opened again. His brain stopped functioning for a few seconds and when it came back online, there was a flurry of thoughts, emotions and urges. 

_WHAT!??!_ His brain exclaimed inside his head. _Who the fuck here has the balls to think they even have a shot with Zhan-ge! How unprofessional! Crushing on a coworker and that too while working with them and that too on a senior actor!! How bloody unprofess...oh._ His brain logged off again.

”What?” He expressed outwardly in as casual a tone as he could.

”Yeah! She’s about your age...and works as a designer for us...similar background as you...I’m sure you’ll have a lot in common!” Da Zhang Wei’s smile didn't falter.

”Uhh...I…,” Zhan blushed and looked at his feet.

”So? Should I set you two up on a blind date? It could be fun!” Da Zhang Wei patted Zhan on his arm.

”Who’s this perso...girl?” Yibo tried to maintain a cool facade but he could sense he was failing slowly.

”Oh, you don't know her,” Da Zhang Wei waved his hand and dismissed Yibo, “she’s mostly backstage...but good looking enough to be in front of the camera,” he winked at Zhan.

”Ge, actually...I don't think I have the time…,” Zhan began.

”Oh, nonsense!” Da Zhang Wei shook his head and chuckled. “You can meet her briefly today after you’re done rehearsing...she’s here on set working somewhere!”

Yibo gripped his microphone tightly and grit his teeth. His heart was bursting with an urge to say something to shut this whole conversation down immediately. But another part of him, his brain that had logged in again, was reminding his heart to calm down and not screw things up for Zhan and him.

 _Surely Zhan-ge wouldn't meet this girl._ He scoffed. _He loves me too much to even entertain that girl! He would never. Don't get angry, Yibo!_

”You guys carry on for now...I’ll bring her around later,” Da Zhang Wei nodded and took their leave.

A moment later a female staff walked up on the stage to adjust their markers, measure the lighting, and turn around and instruct the light guy. Yibo eyed her carefully and walked towards her as Zhan resumed memorizing the lyrics. When she turned around again and began walking towards Zhan, Yibo intercepted her, preventing her from getting any closer to Zhan. He stood between them and crossed his arms across his chest.

”What’s up?” He spoke coldly.

The girl looked at him, confused, but then proceeded to request him to stand on the new markers and handed Yibo his mic. She was about to walk around him to hand Zhan the other mic when Yibo grabbed both mics and gave her what could only be called a stink eye.

"I'll give it to him," he spoke in a low voice, still eyeing her suspiciously. 

She hesitated and then shrugged. She spoke into her headset and instructed the sound guy to get ready for a mic check before they began singing. On seeing her lack of interest in either his expression or Zhan’s presence, Yibo relaxed a bit and concluded that she was probably not the moron, as his brain had labelled the mystery girl, who he had to deal with. Nonetheless, he decided that he couldn't be too cautious and gave her another stink eye for good measure. After she left, he did a quick check on both mics and turned and handed one to Zhan, who was completely oblivious to what had just transpired.

Da Zhang Wei, noticing this little exchange, smirked and looked at Qian Feng who stood at the opposite side of the stage and gave him a discreet nod.

”Time for stage two of the mission,” Qian Feng whispered to himself and nodded back just as discreetly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, full episode (hopefully this link still works. it used to be on the day day up channel but now I can't find that video any more):
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76f4HmFXjuc
> 
> If you wanna smile like an idiot for some time -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8m4tAHkj56I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77dERELMrcc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqCIAxMV13c  
> https://youtu.be/UqCIAxMV13c?t=90  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gXB6W_lRD0  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7zHiGzKmn4  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ci2Y_ONJuYo
> 
> Cang hai yi sheng xiao is the name of the song Yizhan sang a version on the episode -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2G-KnIe6iMc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJfUNIU4hMY
> 
> Apparently, this song is very popular for martial arts movie and was used in a movie called ‘The Swordsman’ and more recently it is being used as the theme song for a game called ‘The Smiling Proud Wanderer’ and is sung by Xiao Zhan!!! And he sounds and looks so fucking good!
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-S7u-QXYV8I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqB8bMJBVn8 
> 
> Them singing Wuji on the show fancam -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwNxEXyRAhY


	134. Stage two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's not been a good day and writing this and reading your comments has been a good distraction! Happy reading!

* * *

Qian Feng walked hastily to their dressing room and locked the door behind him. Since this was an unexpected impromptu mission, he didn't have all the necessary equipment but being on a shooting set had its advantages.

He looked about the room until he spotted a location that met his requirements. Carefully, he retrieved an object from his pocket and placed it inside the vase within the flower arrangement. 

With a smirk, he ruffled the flowers to make sure the object remained hidden and inconspicuous. Satisfied, he straightened his shirt with a smug smile and left the room.

* * *

”Alright, that was good. Want to try it once more, this time with full energy,” Wang Han nodded in approval.

The boys were rehearsing for their two singing performances - the first was a new rendition of ‘Cang hai yi sheng xiao’ and the other being Wuji. Wang Han sat off stage in one of the audience seats, arms crossed across his chest, observing them keenly for both the purpose of the performance feedback and for the mission as well.

Zhan and Yibo began the song from the top. As the song progressed, Wang Han sighed and shook his head.

 _Those two clowns._ Wang Han recollected Qian Feng and Da Zhang Wei’s words. _I told them there’s nothing fishy. These two boys are behaving completely normal!_

Wang Han was about to give up on the mission until he noticed something as the rap section of the song began. He did a double take as Yibo launched into the rap and he thought he saw an expression on Zhan’s face that he couldn't quite read. If he had to label it, he would describe it as a mix of being impressed and something else, something more intense.

Pretty soon, it was Zhan’s turn and he noticed Yibo’s expression soften as soon as Zhan began to rap. His face was full of fondness and encouragement as Zhan glanced at him as if seeking approval on the rap.

_So what? That’s nothing out of the ordinary. Two friends appreciating each other’s talents and supporting each other._

The next time Wang Han noticed something different was when Zhan took the verse up by a key and Yibo looked at him in awe. Wang Han began to realize that Yibo’s eyes barely left Zhan. When Yibo continued the verse in the high key, Zhan looked at him with a proud smile, immediately prompting Yibo to break into a wide smile as he sang.

Wang Han couldn't help but feel a warmth spread through his chest at these subtle affectionate interactions between the two. But he still didn't think this was enough proof to believe that something was brewing between the two boys.

_Whatever the outcome of this mission...if Yibo is in a relationship with someone, we will do everything to protect him and his career._

* * *

__

Qian Feng walked back to the set and watched Yibo and Zhan as they finished the song. He couldn't help but smile when Zhan patted Yibo on the back and smiled brightly.

__

_Whatever is going on, their friendship is real. They do care about each other. But that smile...that smile is familiar. I’ve seen that smile on Yibo earlier when I teased him about dating and when he was lost in his thoughts on the terrace that night, watching the stars. It’s the same smile._

__

Qian Feng’s eyes locked on them suddenly when he noticed Yibo reach out and flatten Zhan’s collar gently. He watched, in surprise, as Yibo’s fingers gently pressed the fabric down and then patted Zhan’s collarbone area before pulling back. Qian Feng thought he saw Yibo pout as if upset over something.

__

_Yibo never initiates physical contact...unless they really are that close...and there’s something so intimate about the way he is touching him. I almost feel like I shouldn't be watching._

__

Zhan was smiling and shaking his head as Yibo continued talking about something and a few seconds into the conversation, placed his hand on Yibo’s arm and massaged it gently as if reassuring him.

__

”Alright, time for the second song - Wuji!” Wang Han called out when the sound guy had the track ready.

__

If the brothers thought that Yibo and Zhan never stopped looking at each in the first song, they truly stood corrected when the two boys sang Wuji. Wang Han, Qian Feng, and Da Zhang Wei glanced at each other repeatedly as the melody continued and the boys’ voices floated about.

__

The soft looks, the small smiles, the nods and encouraging gestures never seemed to end. Without even realizing when or how it happened, Qian Feng noticed that by the end of the song the boys had ended up standing closer than when they were when the song began, totally missing their markers.

__

A crew member informed them of this and the boys nodded and grinned at each other as they returned to their marked spots. They rehearsed the song one more time and their chemistry seemed to only grow and flourish with each look and smile. When they were done with both songs to the satisfaction of the light and sound crew and Wang Han, Qian Feng walked up to the two who were now out of the spotlight at the back of the stage.

__

”Hope I’m not interrupting anything,” Qian Feng smirked as he approached them.

__

He noticed the way Zhan's expression changed from that of exasperation to an easy smile but Yibo took a brief second to flip his face from a scowl to his trademark poker face.

__

_Looks like Da Zhang Wei planted the seed well. Yibo seems miffed about something._ Qian Feng rejoiced inwardly.

__

”No,” Zhan replied immediately, a little too quickly.

__

”That was impressive...both songs sound so good!”

__

”Thank you, Feng-ge,” both said almost in unison, drawing a chuckle from Qian Feng.

__

”And I’ve heard Zhan-Zhan has impressed more than just me,” Qian Feng nudged Zhan playfully. “I hear you have an admirer here!”

__

”No, I…,” Zhan flustered and shook his head as Yibo grit his teeth. 

__

”Da Zhang Wei mentioned it to me and I think it’s a great idea,” Qian Feng exclaimed as he watched Yibo carefully from the corner of his eyes. 

__

”I...I appreciate the gesture, ge but...,” Zhan began but before he could finish his sentence, Qian Feng spoke again.

__

”I know her very well, Zhan...I think you will like her too...unless you’re...seeing someone now?” He raised an eyebrow.

__

Zhan gulped and glanced at Yibo before biting his lips and shaking his head.

__

”Good! Because she is on her break right now and waiting backstage to meet you!”

__

”What?!?” Yibo blurted out before he could hold himself back.

__

”What?” Qian Feng looked at him, feigning innocence. “I said they should meet briefly before their data and now is the perfect chance….it’ll be too busy when we shoot the episode tomorrow.”

__

”Feng-ge! I...this...” Yibo began but then was at a loss for words.

__

”This what?”

__

”I just...I think…,” Yibo could see Zhan glance at him with a look of warning, “I think it’s highly unprofessional of her to want to do this on set…and…”

__

”Hmmm,” Qian Feng pretended to think hard. “You’re right…”

__

Yibo let out an obvious sigh of relief and Zhan let out a short exhale as well.

__

”They shouldn't meet here...this is their workplace...they should go have coffee somewhere after we’re done here!”

__

Yibo’s eyes widened and then he felt his anger flare up. But before he could say anything, Zhan replied.

__

”No no!” Zhan said hurriedly. “It’s fine...there's no need to go out after this...I’ll just meet her here…,” he caved and chose the lesser of two evils.

__

Yibo’s eyes widened even further and he turned to look at Zhan who resolutely avoided his gaze.

__

”Fantastic!” Qian Feng clapped his hands together. “Why don't you head backstage then. She’s waiting there right now!”

__

Yibo watched, dumbfounded and maddeningly frustrated, as Zhan bowed to Qian Feng and walked away without so much as looking his way. He was fuming and if he was a cartoon character he would have had steam coming out of his ears. 

__

His eyes followed Zhan until he disappeared backstage. Qian Feng watched in amusement as Yibo stared at Zhan’s back. He suppressed a chuckle and took out his phone and sent a quick text to Da Zhang Wei.

> _Qian Feng: Stage two complete.  
>    
>  DZW: Wow. Final stage.  
>    
>  Qian Feng: Yep! Soon, we shall know!_😈 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, full episode (hopefully this link still works. it used to be on the day day up channel but now I can't find that video any more):  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76f4HmFXjuc
> 
> If you wanna smile like an idiot for some time -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8m4tAHkj56I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77dERELMrcc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqCIAxMV13c  
> https://youtu.be/UqCIAxMV13c?t=90  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gXB6W_lRD0  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7zHiGzKmn4  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ci2Y_ONJuYo
> 
> Cang hai yi sheng xiao is the name of the song Yizhan sang a version on the episode -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2G-KnIe6iMc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJfUNIU4hMY
> 
> Apparently, this song is very popular for martial arts movie and was used in a movie called ‘The Swordsman’ and more recently it is being used as the theme song for a game called ‘The Smiling Proud Wanderer’ and is sung by Xiao Zhan!!! And he sounds and looks so fucking good!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-S7u-QXYV8I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqB8bMJBVn8 
> 
> Them singing Wuji on the show fancam -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwNxEXyRAhY


	135. Stage three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm down to one final submission and then I am a free bird (trapped in her cage because covid but whatever!) and I will post so many chapters that y'all will beg me to stop!!! muahahahahaha!

* * *

Zhan sighed as he walked away from Qian Feng and Yibo.

_What have I gotten myself into!? But better I meet her here than to have to go on an actual date with her. Oh god! How am I going to let her down nicely. This is so embarrassing. And then there’s Yibo...I hope he keeps it together! We can't risk being found out._

Zhan walked down a corridor backstage that led past the dressing room, prop room, and so on. He looked around as he made his way further down but could not see anyone. 

At the end of the corridor, there were two ways he could go. One led to the exit and the other to where Zhan didn't know. But he kept trudging along, playing and replaying the potential scenarios in his head and phrasing his rejection carefully.

After fifteen minutes of walking around aimlessly and seeing no girl waiting for him, Zhan began retracing his steps. He walked back slowly, keeping his ears and eyes open. As he neared the familiar dressing room, he thought he heard sounds and decided to check it out.

_Maybe she thought I would be at the dressing room. Worth a shot! Oh god, I can't do this. Come on, Zhan...treat it like a bandaid...quick and painful! Or was it quick and pain free? Nope._ He shuddered as he stood outside the door readying himself to meet the girl. _Painful. Definitely painful._

* * *

When fifteen minutes passed and Zhan had still not returned, Yibo began getting antsy. He made an excuse of needing to use the restroom and made his way backstage.

He rushed down the corridor but stopped in his tracks when he saw a girl enter the dressing room and close the door behind her.

”Oh no you don't,” Yibo growled under his breath and stomped towards the room.

When he entered the room, the girl spun around in his direction with a hopeful, excited expression that dropped as soon as she saw him. He looked around and saw, to his surprise, that Zhan was not in the room. 

_Maybe he is looking somewhere else. Good. I’ll deal with her in the meantime._ Yibo thought with satisfaction.

”Are you looking for Zhan-ge?” He asked point blankly.

The girl blushed and nodded.

”Don't you think you are being unprofessional?” Yibo tried to maintain an even tone.

”I thought so too initially but then Da Zhang Wei said it’s okay and so here I am...there’s no harm in trying…”

”No harm in trying?” Yibo began losing his cool. “Do you know how uncomfortable you are making Zhan-ge?”

”Oh! But I’m sure he is used to it...I’m not asking for much, just one…”

”Just one what? Just one date!? That is enough to make someone as nice and professional as Zhan-ge uncomfortable.” Yibo felt himself losing his cool and couldn't hold back his words any longer. “And how could you even think that you had a chanc…”

”Date?” The girl interrupted him with a bewildered look on her face.

”Yes...isn't that why you’re looking for him…,” Yibo's face had meanness written all over it.

The girl turned a beetroot red and shook her head.

”I...I...I was just…,” she stuttered.

”You were just what?” Yibo’s voice now had a sting to it.

”I…,” she began trembling, “I was just...just going to ask him for one autograph,” and with that she burst into tears.

”Oh…,” Yibo froze at her words and her tears.

”Bo-di?” The door opened suddenly.

Zhan entered the room as Yibo turned around, horror and mortification written all over his face. Beyond Yibo’s shoulder, Zhan saw a short female figure, covering her face, shoulders shaking. His eyes widened as he realized that the girl was crying.

”Bo-di…,” Zhan stepped forward and closed the door behind him, “What is going on?”

”I...I...I thought…”

The girl moved her hands away and looked up. The moment she saw Zhan, she flustered and wiped her tears. 

”What did you do?” Zhan spoke cautiously and in a low voice.

”I thought she was…”

Zhan didn't need to hear the end of that sentence. He immediately guessed what had happened. She was probably the girl Da Zhang Wei and Qian Feng had mentioned to him earlier and Yibo had probably given her a piece of his mind. He cringed inwardly as he prayed to all the gods above that Yibo hadn't given them away.

”I thought she was…,” Yibo repeated but then paused and took a deep breath and recomposed himself, “but she’s here for your autograph, ge,” he cleared his throat and scratched the back of his head.

”Oh,” Zhan straightened up and looked at Yibo then the girl and then at Yibo again.

_So she isn't the one...then who is this mystery girl!?_ Zhan thought to himself. _And Yibo...Yibo...Yibo...what am I going to do with him...he made the poor girl cry._

”I’m sorry,” Yibo mumbled to Zhan and then turned back to the girl and repeated his apology.

The girl looked at Yibo and then her feet.

”Here,” Zhan walked past Yibo and approached the girl with a kind smile. “I apologize on behalf of Wang Yibo. Where do you want me to autograph?” He stretched his hand out for the pen she was holding. 

It was then that Yibo noticed that the girl’s other hand had been behind her back the whole time. Now, she brought it forward to reveal a small photograph that she wanted Zhan to sign.

_Fuck my life. She really is just a fan._ He shut his eyes and cursed inwardly. _You total fucking moron, Yibo!_

”Here you go,” Zhan signed the photo and handed it back to her.

”Could I…,” she glanced over at Yibo nervously. “Could I get a selfie? If it’s not too unprofessional!” She added hastily.

”Of course,” Zhan nodded happily.

Yibo watched uncomfortably and awkwardly as they took a selfie and the girl was back to blushing and beaming within seconds of being around Zhan, talking to him, telling him her favorite X-Nine songs and Untamed moments. Finally, Zhan bowed courteously and she returned the bow before taking her leave. On her way out, she paused in front of Yibo and bowed quickly and darted out the door before Yibo could bow back.

When the door closed, Yibo turned to face Zhan hesitantly and readied himself when he saw Zhan’s frowning face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, full episode (hopefully this link still works. it used to be on the day day up channel but now I can't find that video any more):  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76f4HmFXjuc
> 
> If you wanna smile like an idiot for some time -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8m4tAHkj56I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77dERELMrcc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqCIAxMV13c  
> https://youtu.be/UqCIAxMV13c?t=90  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gXB6W_lRD0  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7zHiGzKmn4  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ci2Y_ONJuYo
> 
> Cang hai yi sheng xiao is the name of the song Yizhan sang a version on the episode -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2G-KnIe6iMc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJfUNIU4hMY
> 
> Apparently, this song is very popular for martial arts movie and was used in a movie called ‘The Swordsman’ and more recently it is being used as the theme song for a game called ‘The Smiling Proud Wanderer’ and is sung by Xiao Zhan!!! And he sounds and looks so fucking good!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-S7u-QXYV8I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqB8bMJBVn8 
> 
> Them singing Wuji on the show fancam -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwNxEXyRAhY


	136. Mission accomplished?

* * *

”Bo-di! What were you thinking?!” Zhan threw his hands up in the air as soon as the girl left the dressing room.

”I...I’m sorry, ge…,” Yibo looked at his feet sheepishly. “I really didn't mean to…”

”Mean to shout at an innocent girl and make her cry!?”

”I didn't know that she wasn't that girl...and I did not shout...all I said was…”

”You know what? I don't even wanna know what you told her. Just please...please tell me you didn't tell her we’re together in order to...make her back off?”

”No, of course not!” Yibo replied confidently, secretly glad that he hadn't totally screwed up.

”Okay,” Zhan let out a long sigh of relief and leaned against the dressing table. “Good.”

Yibo waited for Zhan to say more but the man remained silent. He didn't make eye contact with Yibo and looked at the ground intently as if contemplating something.

”I’m sorry, ge,” Yibo pinched Zhan’s sleeve.

Zhan shook his head and kept his gaze turned away.

”Ge…,” Yibo whined softly. “I said I’m sorry. I just...couldn't stand the thought of you with a girl who liked you...asking you out on a date…”

Zhan’s face softened but he didn't look at Yibo when he spoke.

”I was obviously going to turn her down, Yibo.”

”I know...I just got possessive.”

This time, Zhan turned to look at him and his heart melted when he saw the innocence on Yibo’s face.

”Bo-di,” Zhan brushed aside a strand of hair from Yibo’s forehead. “This could have turned out very very bad….you realize that, right?”

Yibo nodded meekly.

”We don't know how the people here would have reacted…to us...maybe not your brothers...but the staff and crew?”

”You’re right…,” Yibo looked at his feet, ashamed.

”Hey,” Zhan held his hands and pulled him closer. “Look at me…”

Yibo looked up slowly.

”Promise me you won't lose your cool next time...even if you...get a little jealous? Keep it together...only while we’re here....where people know us...where we have to hide...what we have...”

Yibo felt his eyes sting at Zhan’s words. 

”How could what we have be bad in the eyes of anyone…”

”I know, didi,” Zhan caressed Yibo’s cheek. “But this is where we live and work…”

”Hmm,” Yibo wiped the corner of his eyes. 

”Hey, don't cry puppy.” Zhan pulled Yibo into an embrace.

”It’s not fair,” Yibo mumbled as he rested his chin on Zhan’s shoulder. “I got so jealous because she could ask you out and go on a date with you in public and it would all be okay and acceptable. But I...I can't have that with you...I can't do those things with you.”

”It’s not fair. I know...” Zhan massaged Yibo’s back. “But I wouldn't trade what we have for anything else in this world.”

Yibo pulled away and looked at Zhan.

”For anything in this whole wide world?”

”No matter what it is,” Zhan smiled and shook his head. “Nothing comes even close to how special you are to me.”

”I feel the same way,” Yibo smiled and sniffled. 

”Good,” Zhan grinned and tapped one finger on Yibo’s now wet nose.

* * *

“This is it!” Da Zhang Wei exclaimed as he, Wang Han and Qian Feng huddled together listening through their earpieces. “We got them! Hiding a mic in the dressing room was a brilliant idea!”

”Well I’ll be…,” Wang Han smacked his forehead. “Looks like you two clowns were right!”

”Let’s go there and bust them!” Da Zhang Wei pumped his fist in the air.

They turned to look at Qian Feng but contrary to their expectation, he didn't have an enthusiastic victory grin on his face. Instead, he looked sad and lost in his thoughts.

”What is it? You were right...you should be ecstatic!” Wang Han shook him by the shoulder.

”I just…,” Qian Feng’s voice was low and almost trembling. “I just...I’ve never seen Yibo so...happy as I have the last few months…”

”That’s good, right?” Da Zhang Wei replied.

”Yeah...but this...us ‘busting’ them...maybe it’s wrong…”

”Why? We aren’t judging them...we’re all family!”

”Exactly,” Qian Feng took Wang Han and Da Zhang Wei’s earpieces out and faced them with a long exhale. “So maybe we should wait for our little brother to be ready to tell us himself.”

Wang Han and Da Zhang Wei remained silent for several seconds. Then, a smile spread across their faces. Wang Han patted Qian Feng on his back and pulled both of them in for a hug.

”You’re right...for now, let’s just be happy he has found someone who cares about him deeply and loves him the way Yibo deserves to be loved.”

”Umm,” Qian Feng pulled back suddenly and pursed his lips as he yanked his own ear piece out hurriedly. “I’ll be right back!”

Before either of them could say anything, Qian Feng dashed away and within seconds disappeared backstage. Both men gazed at his trail and crossed their arms across their chest.

”That’s the fastest I’ve seen him move in a long time,” Wang Han stated slowly.

* * *

”Good,” Zhan placed a hand behind Yibo’s head and pulled him close once again. “Now, come here.”

Yibo grinned as Zhan closed the gap and sealed their lips together. The kiss began soft and sweet but pretty soon, their emotions overflowed into it and they wrapped their bodies together. Zhan spread his legs wider and pulled Yibo closer until he stood between his legs. He ran his hands through Yibo’s hair as he deepened the kiss.

Yibo moaned and welcomed Zhan’s tongue and pressed his body against Zhan.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo whispered in between the kisses. “I love you…”

Zhan smiled against Yibo’s lips and resumed kissing him with renewed vigour.

Zhan’s hands roamed Yibo’s entire body, and then rested on his ass. He pulled Yibo against him until their hips were rubbing together, drawing groans from both of them.

Suddenly, they heard a loud voice out in the corridor.

”Have you seen Yibo and Xiao Zhan anywhere?”

It seemed to be an abnormally loud Qian Feng searching for them. Zhan and Yibo immediately pulled apart and straightened themselves. Zhan licked his lips and smoothed his hair as he rushed to the door. He turned to Yibo before opening it.

”I’ll go out and take him back to the stage…join us there a few minutes later, okay?”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and wiped his lips while fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

Zhan smiled affectionately and walked back to him. He placed a hand on his cheek and kissed his nose.

”I love you too, you idiot.”

”Even when I do stupid things?” Yibo asked worriedly.

”Even when you’re the biggest idiot in the world.”

Yibo grinned and hugged Zhan.

”Okay," Zhan smiled and pulled back after a few seconds. "I’ll leave first….”

Zhan stepped out and saw Qian Feng a few feet away.

”Ah there you are, Zhan-Zhan,” Qian Feng cleared his throat and feigned nonchalance. “Where have you been?”

”I...uhh...was looking for the girl you mentioned but I couldn't find her.”

”Ah....never mind that…,” he waved his hand, “maybe she got shy and left...you have that influence on people I’m sure…,” he chuckled with a wink.

”Feng-ge! You’re embarrassing me!”

_Imagine how embarrassing it would have been if either of you had got caught , you two idiots in love!_ Qian Feng chuckled inwardly.

They walked back to the stage together and Zhan let go of the breath he was holding once they were out of sight from the dressing room.

_Good, they won't be able to tell that Yibo was with me in the dressing room._ Zhan thought. _Fuck, that was too close. We could have been busted today!_

Inside the dressing room, Yibo waited for a few minutes after Zhan left and then walked out of the room as well.

_Fuck, that was close. We could have been busted today! I’m not ready to tell them yet...but I want to...soon.”_ Yibo thought.

When he joined Zhan on stage, he was standing there alone rehearsing Wuji. They looked at each other with smirks on their faces and bumped fists when Qian Feng was looking the other way.

Qian Feng turned around and looked at Da Zhang Wei and Wang Han who sat in the audience seats and raised his fist in their direction discreetly. They smirked and raised their fists pretending to bump it against his.

_Technically,_ Qian Feng thought to himself with a smirk, _Mission accomplished._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, full episode (hopefully this link still works. it used to be on the day day up channel but now I can't find that video any more):  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76f4HmFXjuc
> 
> If you wanna smile like an idiot for some time -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8m4tAHkj56I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77dERELMrcc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqCIAxMV13c  
> https://youtu.be/UqCIAxMV13c?t=90  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gXB6W_lRD0  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7zHiGzKmn4  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ci2Y_ONJuYo
> 
> Cang hai yi sheng xiao is the name of the song Yizhan sang a version on the episode -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2G-KnIe6iMc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJfUNIU4hMY
> 
> Apparently, this song is very popular for martial arts movie and was used in a movie called ‘The Swordsman’ and more recently it is being used as the theme song for a game called ‘The Smiling Proud Wanderer’ and is sung by Xiao Zhan!!! And he sounds and looks so fucking good!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-S7u-QXYV8I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqB8bMJBVn8 
> 
> Them singing Wuji on the show fancam -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwNxEXyRAhY


	137. Just like these two deserve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heads up - not my best chapter. Just a recounting of the TTXS Yizhan episode with some sprinkles of the brothers thrown in. Excited for the next chapter though! I don't even know why I wrote this - OH I KNOW it's because it would have been a weird gap if I didn't write it and it would have bothered my obsessive ass. Sorry you have to trudge through this, feel free to skip it :P
> 
> Also, to get situated - we are somewhere a few days before when the Yizhan TTXS episode aired on July 28!

* * *

The next day, when everyone arrived on set, Qian Feng and the rest of the brothers couldn't help but observe Zhan and Yibo affectionately. Although, Qian Feng had spent all night trying to erase the sounds he had heard in the ear piece, when Zhan and Yibo had ‘sorted things out’, from his mind.

When they shot their entrance after the introduction, the audience's cheers were so loud that they could barely hear the music and screwed up the choreography. They had to do two more takes to get it right. Each time they messed up, they giggled like little children and walked backstage again to redo the performance. 

When the introductions were being done for the rest of the guests, Zhan and Yibo were lost in their own little world. Soon it was Yibo’s turn to introduce Zhan and Qian Feng and the other brothers watched his face carefully as he fumbled through the words. 

”I...uh...I gained a new...uhh...friend,” Yibo stuttered.

They had to do a few retakes and in between one such take, Da Zhang Wei whispered something to Yibo.

”Do you need us to change the introduction to some other word apart from friend?” He smirked.

Yibo shook his head furiously and immediately got it right on the next take.

As the shoot progressed, Qian Feng watched in amusement as they talked to each other non stop when the others had to present or talk. Only when it was their turn would they pause their chatter but even then their eyes would always find each other.

Wang Han had slipped in a last minute segment where he asked the hosts and their guests what their pairing name or couple name would be. Zhan and Yibo were a little shocked at the sudden inclusion of such a game in the script and looked around sheepishly as the audience began chanting suggestions for them.

They had seen these cp names before on Weibo. They were not oblivious to the fact that their pairing had taken the internet and fans of the show by storm. People even shipped them to the extent of analysing all their photos and videos from the behind the scenes.

”What do you think?” Zhan asked Yibo in a low voice as the other guests announced their names.

”Bo Jun Yi Xiao?” Yibo whispered carefully and grinned.

”Shut up!” Zhan shot him a warning glare.

”Okay, okay...Wangxian? Wangxiao?”

”Hmm...not catchy enough...how about…Yizhan?” Zhan tapped his chin as he thought.

”Yizhan…,” Yibo repeated and smiled slowly. “Yeah,” he nodded. “Yizhan.”

When Wang Han called on them a little too enthusiastically, Yibo raised his mic and Zhan braced himself to not react with a blush.

”Yi…,” Yibo began but was interrupted by the audience’s crazy reaction, “...Yizhan.”

Zhan smiled radiantly despite failing to school his face as the audience erupted into a roar once more. Wang Han nodded and threw them a smile they couldn't read.

When their childhood photos came on the screen, Zhan and Yibo couldn't maintain their facades any more. They burst into affectionate laughter on seeing each other’s photos. Zhan gasped and laughed when he saw the album Yibo had turned in to his management when auditioning to be a trainee.

”Wow,” Zhan exclaimed.

When Zhan’s college photo came up on the screen, it was Yibo’s turn to ridicule Zhan. He laughed heartily, and looked at Zhan with an expression that said _‘that’s you!?’_.

As Yibo’s childhood album was passed around, much to his chagrin, Zhan reached out for it from one of the guests excitedly. But as soon as he took the album, he looked up startled as the audience cheered loudly all of a sudden. Realizing it was because he was holding Yibo’s album, he quickly handed it to him instead of flipping through it like he had originally intended. Yibo laughed at the situation and Zhan rolled his eyes.

_Wow, I know our cp is gaining popularity. But this is crazy! We could barely hear the music to our dance routine...Yibo could barely get our pair name out before the audience went crazy...they cheer and whistle each time we so much as look at each other. I can't even look at his album without them losing it!_ He chuckled. _I guess it’s good for the show and it’ll die down eventually. Might as well enjoy it while it lasts._

After the guests took their seats and Yibo and the other brothers began hosting the episode, Qian Feng couldn't help but notice the way Yibo’s eyes kept roaming to his right where Zhan sat.

On the request of the audience, Zhan and Yibo had to engage in a winking contest. When they stood across from each other, Zhan could feel his heart beating louder.

_Keep it cool, Zhan...don’t lose yourself in his eyes._

It didn't help that Yibo was giving him a very wide and soft smile. And as soon as the winking began, Zhan winked a few times and then pretended something was in his eyes just to avoid looking straight at Yibo.

Yibo stopped playing and, on reflex, reached out for Zhan, worried about his eyes. The director called a cut on the interruption and Yibo apologized as he gestured towards Zhan.

_Fuck._ Zhan thought. _Shouldn't have faked getting something in my eye. Need to keep up this act now!_

Wang Han observed as Yibo led Zhan off stage to one side and the crew got him water to splash on his eyes. Yibo watched, worried and concerned, but when Zhan looked at him guiltily, he knew it had all been an act. They walked back on stage, Yibo grinning happily and Zhan sheepishly.

Later, when Yibo and one of the band members had to compliment each other, Zhan felt a slight pang of jealousy as he thought back to how rainbow farting was their thing. He raised an eyebrow when at the end of the game, the man leaned forward and hugged a smiling Yibo. He raised both eyebrows when he saw how Yibo didn't flinch or hold back on the hug either.

When they took a break and Yibo walked over to him, Zhan couldn't help but ignore him a little. He decided it was better to not let anyone including Yibo notice his jealousy on set. So he plastered a casual smile and interacted with everyone amicably.

Yibo thought something was amiss when he approached Zhan and was given the smile that he knew Zhan reserved for reporters but before he could say or do anything, they were ready for the next shot.

The next segment was with Zhan and after going over their experiences while shooting the Untamed, Wang Han asked them what they called each other.

_Bo-di, didi, sweetie, puppy, baby lion…_ Zhan’s brain rattled.

_Zhan-ge, gege, sweetheart, my little bunny rabbit…_ Yibo thought and smirked inwardly.

”Uhh...Lao-Wang,” Zhan swallowed his thoughts and replied.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo settled for the most acceptable of all the options.

When they went over their favorite songs, and were asked to pick one song each, Yibo chose “If I were young’ and Zhan chose ‘What I miss’. Zhan couldn't help but blush when the audience cheered as Yibo sang and he remembered what that song meant to Yibo. Yibo listened in awe as Zhan hit the high notes of the Stefanie Sun song.

Afterwards, they were asked to do the TTXS song and dance routine and Zhan laughed nervously. Yibo had taught it to him several times but he still failed to remember it correctly. They had to do several takes because either Zhan forgot the step or Yibo looked at Zhan too long instead of the camera.

Once they were done with their first singing performance, the brothers returned on stage imitating their choreography. When Zhan moved to return to his seat, Yibo followed him until Da Zhang Wei intercepted him with a raised eyebrow.

”Where do you think you’re going?” He whispered and leaned in. “You’re the host, remember? You can't go sit with the guests, Yibo!”

”Oh yeah, I was just…,” Yibo flustered when he realized he was following Zhan around like a puppy.

As the rest of the guests came up for their performances, Qian Feng rolled his eyes as he noticed Yibo’s eyes always wander back to Zhan.

_The editors will have to do a lot of work on this episode._ He sighed with a chuckle. _We’ll be lucky if we get a single shot of Yibo looking at the audience. We need to make sure it doesn’t get too obvious how these two feel about each other. Wang Han will have to sit down with the editors to personally check the final cut. But it’s okay. As long as he is happy!_

When Zhan was asked what song he would sing to his beloved, Yibo did everything in his power to not blush as Zhan sang one of their mutual favorites - Jay Chou’s Love Confession.

And when the young children came up to do the english speaking segment, hilarity ensued.

”You are so beautiful,” the young boy addressed Yibo who immediately raised an eyebrow, confused at the choice of adjective.

”No no no,” Yibo mumbled as Da Zhang Wei made fun of the situation.

Da Zhang Wei looked at Zhan and they chuckled in unison at Yibo’s embarrassed plight. Zhan couldn't help but laugh from where he sat with the other guests until he heard Qian Feng chuckle and speak into the mic.

”Shouldn't Xiao Zhan be the one saying that?” Qian Feng laughed out loud.

Zhan stopped laughing and blushed for a moment before regaining his composure and plastering a smile on his face. Yibo did a double take, unsure if he had correctly.

”This is how you would address a girl,” the little boy continued.

”Wait, so are you calling me a girl!?” Yibo’s eyes widened and he questioned the young kid.

Zhan curled his lips inwards and smirked at the scene that was unfolding before him. When Yibo turned to look at him as if saying _’Can you believe this kid!? Me? A girl!?’_ , he tried to school his face but failed.

Yibo glared at him on seeing the smirk on his face and then flushed some more when Zhan winked at him as if saying _’Well, aren’t you?’_.

As the show progressed and the band came on stage, Yibo now stood closer to where Zhan sat. But because the hosts and guests stood in a semi circle, now Yibo had to turn all the way around to glance at Zhan. It took everything he had to control his reflexes and turn around each time he heard Zhan’s magical laughter.

When the time came for the guests to perform individually and for the audience to vote, Zhan and Yibo readied themselves for their second singing performance of the evening - Wuji.

”I heard your version of Wuji that you recorded with Lin Hai,” Qian Feng’s guest, Zhang Bichen leaned in closer to Zhan. “You both sang it beautifully.”

”Oh, thank you!” Zhan and Yibo bowed.

”Lin Hai is an old friend...I loved Zhou Bi Chang’s version as well...but you both brought that song to life!”

”No no,” Zhan blushed and shook his head. “But thank you…”

”Hopefully, I can perform this song one day too! It would be so much fun! Good luck for today’s performance!”

Zhan and Yibo flowed through the song, managing to not miss a key even amidst all the shouts and cheers. They nodded in satisfaction when the song was done but the audience kept chanting for more. So Zhan nudged Yibo to give them a little show.

At the repeated requests of the audience and his brothers, Yibo did a little freestyle piece. Zhan noticed the leader of the band that came as Gao Tianhe’s guests, the same one who had complimented and hugged Yibo, was staring at Yibo in awe. As casually as he could, Zhan stepped sidewards and repositioned himself, effectively blocking the man’s view.

_Stare at my ass now, stupid old school rockstar with a bad sense of dressing and stupid hairdo._ Zhan snickered inwardly.

When Yibo was done, Zhan handed him his mic back but the audience didn't stop chanting. Zhan silenced them by placing a finger on his lips and when they had done so, he rewarded them by a small performance of his own. He sang another verse from Wuji that finally satisfied them.

When the episode wrapped up, Zhan’s mouth watered at all the food that was brought out for them. He walked around with Yibo, sampling and marvelling, much to the other’s amusement.

”Don't fill up your stomach now itself,” Wang Han came over to Zhan’s side. “Come over and join us for dinner after.”

”Oh...I,” Zhan hesitated.

”Come on, Yibo...convince Zhan-Zhan...I’m cooking after all!”

”Oh, you gotta try Han-ge’s cooking!” Yibo nodded enthusiastically. 

”Well then,” Zhan chuckled, “I guess we’re...I mean I’m joining you for dinner, Han-ge!”

”And don't worry about him filling his stomach,” Yibo grinned. “Zhan-ge is like a bottomless pit when it comes to food.”

Wang Han watched in amusement and joy as the two boys began smacking and bickering. He continued watching as they made their way down the aisle of food trays and Zhan sampled them one by one and leaned over, instructing Yibo on which ones to avoid. He felt something warm spread across his chest when he saw Yibo follow Zhan around obediently and listen carefully to everything he said and Zhan smiling kindly as he handed him the non spicy dishes. Yibo, on the other hand, sniffed some of the dishes at the far end and walked over to Zhan and mentioned the ones he would enjoy. Every touch, every smile, every gaze was filled with love.

_How can anyone think this is wrong? Every person should have the right to love and be loved. Just like these two deserve._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, full episode (hopefully this link still works. it used to be on the day day up channel but now I can't find that video any more):  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76f4HmFXjuc
> 
> Yizhan cp name fancam -  
> https://twitter.com/wokkyguoguo/status/1155529363095351297?lang=en
> 
> Helpful explanation of all their different names (bjyx/zsww/lsfy) -  
> https://fanlore.org/wiki/Wang_Yibo/Xiao_Zhan
> 
> Jay Chou’s Love Confession Eng translation -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AxYLa5eqUhc
> 
> Bonus! X-Nine singing Love Confession -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBtj6NVBFog
> 
> Zhang Bichen’s Wuji from the Tencent Awards Show -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tb62PO4eErA  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OsO6bf36-zY
> 
> Zhou Bi Chang’s Wuji from OST -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2uAHV0BFME
> 
> If you wanna smile like an idiot for some time -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8m4tAHkj56I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=77dERELMrcc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqCIAxMV13c  
> https://youtu.be/UqCIAxMV13c?t=90  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gXB6W_lRD0  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7zHiGzKmn4  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ci2Y_ONJuYo
> 
> Cang hai yi sheng xiao is the name of the song Yizhan sang a version on the episode -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2G-KnIe6iMc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJfUNIU4hMY
> 
> Apparently, this song is very popular for martial arts movie and was used in a movie called ‘The Swordsman’ and more recently it is being used as the theme song for a game called ‘The Smiling Proud Wanderer’ and is sung by Xiao Zhan!!! And he sounds and looks so fucking good!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-S7u-QXYV8I  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqB8bMJBVn8 
> 
> Them singing Wuji on the show fancam -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwNxEXyRAhY


	138. It was a trap

* * *

”Was it just me or were you a little pissed off in the middle of the shoot?” Yibo leaned in closer and asked Zhan as they waited for the other TTXS brothers to be ready.

They were going to head to Wang Han’s home for dinner now that the shoot was wrapped up. While they waited, Yibo remembered the moment when Zhan had plastered a fake smile on his face and he could have sworn Zhan was ignoring him.

”Huh?” Zhan replied, confused.

”You had that fake smile and didn't look at me for a few minutes.”

”Ohh,” Zhan recalled and immediately rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “It was nothing...silly…”

Yibo crossed his arms across his chest and raised an eyebrow, waiting patiently.

”Fine!” Zhan rolled his eyes. “I was just a little...surprised…when you hugged that man…”

”Who?” Yibo looked surprised.

”The lead singer from Lion.” Zhan frowned, reliving the memory.

”Ge!” Yibo threw his head back, laughing. 

”What?” Zhan asked, irritated.

”I thought we said we would control our jealousy at work?” Yibo wiggled his eyebrows.

”I…,” Zhan began but shut his mouth. “Yeah, whatever…,” he pouted.

”Aww,” Yibo cooed and looked around before whispering. “I wanna kiss you so bad, ge…”

”Don't change the topic,” Zhan bared his teeth, annoyed.

”Alright,” Yibo chuckled. “I just...I could sense his discomfort at the situation and the way we were forced to talk and compliment each other...I couldn't do it...it’s not like how we rainbow fart all the time...there was just a brotherhood in our shared awkwardness….nothing more, ge…”

”Hmm…”

”Sorry…,” Yibo puckered his lips and blew him a small kiss.

”Hmm…”

”Xiao Zhan...if you don't forgive me right now I _will_ kiss you right here right now I don't care who walks in,” Yibo straightened himself and took a step closer.

”Okay, okay,” Zhan flustered and backed off. “It’s fine…,” he poked his tongue out.

”Apparently not,” Yibo grinned and took a step closer again.

He looked around and on seeing no one in the dressing room, pretended to swoop in for a kiss. Zhan’s eyes widened and he walked around the chair putting it between him and Yibo.

Pretty soon he was being chased around the room by Yibo.

”Come here, ge...I said I’m sorry,” Yibo grinned wider.

”Bo-di!” Zhan giggled and ran to the other end of the room. “Stop it!”

Eventually Yibo caught up with Zhan and wrapped an arm around his waist and held him in place, close to his body. He leaned in and placed a kiss on both his cheeks and then on his lips before letting him go.

Before Zhan could say anything, the door opened and Wang Han poked his head in.

”Ready to go you two?”

Zhan and Yibo flustered a little but then nodded and followed him out.

* * *

Wang Han’s home was warm and welcoming and smelled of delicious food, all cooked by him. As dinner progressed, the conversation flowed freely until Yibo suddenly decided to switch gears abruptly. The easy camaraderie between Zhan and his brothers made him feel warm and ready and before he knew what he was doing, he was speaking to fill the gap that had formed when everyone took their second servings.

”So...uhhh,” Yibo began. “There’s something I wanted to tell you all…”

”What is it?” Wang Han looked at Yibo with curiosity. 

”I...I’m seeing someone…”

”Oh…,” Wang Han replied and stole a glance at Qian Feng and Da Zhang Wei who were pretending to act clueless as well.

”Now this may come as a bit of a surprise,” Yibo bit his lips, “but I’m very happy with him...uhh...I mean...yeah...with him…,” Yibo turned to look at Zhan.

”Oh…uhuh...I see….” Wang Han nodded.

”I mean I’m dating Xiao Zhan…”

”Oh! That’s nice!” Qian Feng nodded as well.

”Umm, that’s all?” Yibo looked at the two nodding men and then at Da Zhang Wei. “I’m saying that me and Zhan-ge...we’re in a relationship...he’s my boyfriend…”

”Yes, yes…that’s good…,” Da Zhang Wei began nodding as well.

”Why are you three not more shocked!? And why are you all just...staring at me and nodding like that…?!”

”You already knew, didn't you?” Zhan poked his inner cheek with his tongue and placed his chopsticks down.

”Yeah…”

”Kind of…”

”Well...yes…”

They all mumbled at once. Yibo’ eyes widened and he nearly choked on his chicken piece.

”Since when!?” He exclaimed.

”Since yesterday…,” Qian Feng grinned embarrassedly.

”How!?”

”Well….,” he pursed his lips, “we….kind of...sort of...laid a trap…” 

”Trap!?”

”Yeah the whole blind date saga….it was a trap…”

”It was what?!” Yibo and Zhan blurted at the same time.

”Yeah,” Qian Feng grinned sheepishly and scratched the back of his head. “It was a setup. We were on a mission to find out if you two were together….”

”So that girl was sent by you!?” Yibo’s eyes widened.

”What girl? We didn't send any girl...there was NO girl…,” Qian Feng tilted his head and looked at Yibo in confusion.

”Oh my god! Are you talking about the girl who is Xiao Zhan’s fan!?” Da Zhang Wei interrupted and smacked his forehead.

”Yeah,” Yibo nodded and then proceeded to smack his own forehead.

”What...what happened to that girl?” Qian Feng looked between the two exasperated faces.

”What did you do Yibo?” Da Zhang Wei sighed.

”I thought she was the girl you two were trying to set Zhan-ge up with and when I saw her go to the dressing room, I thought…”

”Oh my god, what did you do?” Qian Feng gasped.

”He basically told her she was being unprofessional and told her to back off until he realized all she wanted was an autograph.” Zhan pursed his lips and supplied.

”Wow...we need to give her a raise effective tomorrow,” Wang Han spoke finally and let out a long exhale.

”Oh man!” Da Zhang Wei sighed. “Guess we hadn't start listening in then…it all makes sense now...”

”Wait what?” Yibo deadpanned. “Listening in?”

”Oh..uhh…”

”Feng-ge…..Wei-ge...Han-ge?!?!”

”Yeah...as part of the trap we...put a mic in the dressing room...that’s how we knew how jealous you were…”

”So you heard...everything?” Zhan gulped.

”Yeah...the whole conversation,” Da Zhang Wei snapped his fingers and beamed.

”Oh okay,” Zhan sighed in relief.

”Yeah...just the conversation,” Qian Feng added hurriedly, “nothing else,” his voice went up a key. “Absolutely nothing else after that...definitely not any kiss...I mean fighting...I meant fighting...

A few seconds of silence later, Da Zhang Wei and Qian Feng glanced at each other and stifled their smirks but to no avail. The smirks turned into choked giggles and pretty soon they were laughing, louder and louder with each passing second. Zhan and Yibo, although blushing hard, also got infected and laughed clutching their sides at the gigantic ripple effect the prank had had.

Wang Han smiled and shook his head at the giggling bunch and resumed eating.


	139. We'll figure it out

* * *

After dinner, Zhan insisted on helping Wang Han clear up. His wife was visiting her family along with the children and Zhan said it was the least he could do after Wang Han cooked them such a delicious meal. As they worked in the kitchen, Yibo, Qian Feng and Da Zhang Wei played video games in the living room. 

”So...how long have you guys been together now?” Wang Han asked with a kind smile.

”Uhh...nine months now,” Zhan replied shyly. 

”That’s long...for you young people...especially given your work schedules...how do you manage…”

”We’re living together,” Zhan spoke without giving it a second thought but then froze.

”Ahh…,” Wang Han contemplated his response to Zhan’s confession.

”I mean...uhh...we…it’s the only way we actually get to spend time together because of our schedules…”

”Understandable,” Wang Han replied quietly.

After some silence, with the exception of the sounds of the running water and the scrubbing of dishes, Wang Han spoke once again.

”Yibo is a sensitive boy...he’s mature for his age in many ways...but he is also still a child…”

Zhan nodded silently.

”He is all heart with the people he cares about...and from what I...heard yesterday,” Wang Han grinned, “it sounds like you care a lot about him too.”

”I do,” Zhan looked at Wang Han with sincerity in his voice and eyes.

”Good, because he has been through a lot to get where he is today...and he lives far away from his family...alone...he deserves a loving, supportive partner.”

Zhan nodded again.

”What are your intentions?”

”Huh? My what?”

”Forgive my bluntness but I am just looking out for my boy...you’re much older than him...he is barely 22...and your relationship...is going to be hard enough to maintain given your professions, let alone the way it’s currently viewed in our society...and legally…”

Zhan bit his lip nervously as Wang Han’s words stung him. But he understood where the words were coming from and for that he was grateful.

”I...I love him, Han-ge,” Zhan began softly. “I know how difficult the journey ahead is going to be. But I am determined. And I know once Yibo makes up his mind to do something, nothing can stop him. I am the same way. We are serious about each other. And we...have told the people we love and trust.”

”Oh, so your families know?”

”Yes,” Zhan gave him a small smile.

”That’s wonderful!”

Zhan blushed and nodded.

”But what will your future look like? “

”A home. Us. Together. Two pets. A dog and a cat.” Zhan smiled to himself as he wiped a dish dry. “A wedding ring on both our hands,” Zhan was lost in his own thoughts. “Maybe, if we’re lucky, children.”

”Zhan-Zhan,” Wang Han placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “That is beautiful...but marriage? Children? How will that be possible?”

”I don't know…” Zhan’s voice reduced to a whisper and he looked at the counter sadly. “But I want it to be...we’ll figure it out...whatever it takes,” he felt his eyes burn and tears began slipping out.

”Oh, my dear boy,” Wang Han said in a soothing voice and pulled Zhan in for a hug. 

”We will figure it out,” a voice interrupted the quiet moment and Yibo walked into the kitchen.

Zhan pulled away from Wang Han’s embrace and looked in Yibo’s direction with a little surprise while still grateful for his presence. Yibo joined them and wiped Zhan’s cheek with a reassuring smile.

”Han-ge!” Yibo feigned a scowl. “You made my boyfriend cry!”

”Sorry sorry!” Wang Han chuckled. “I got carried away and started grilling him.”

Yibo caressed Zhan’s cheek and Zhan leaned into the touch. 

”I want all of those things too,” Yibo spoke but he couldn't hide the tremble in his voice, “and we will figure it out no matter what it takes.”

Wang Han smiled fondly as he observed the love between the two boys. With a long inhale he decided to break the intense atmosphere.

”Alright, you two! Let’s sit on the terrace...it’s beautiful weather outside...Yibo, grab the beer from the fridge.”

”How about some baiju?” Yibo grinned.

Wang Han rolled his eyes and conceded.

* * *

”Finally...there you three are...oooh, alcohol...just what was missing!” Da Zhang Wei exclaimed.

”Let’s head up to the terrace,” Wang Han gestured.

They sat around the terrace in the warm pleasant breeze under the moonlit night sky. Zhan and Yibo sat on the ground leaning against the railing, side by side, while the other brothers sat on the armchairs across from them.

”Cheers to Zhan-Zhan and Yibo!” Qian Feng raised his glass.

The brothers cheered and smirked in their direction, causing Zhan and Yibo to fluster. They raised their drinks as well and everyone had the first round.

”Who would have known our little Yibo was into older people!” Qian Feng chuckled.

”Ge!” Yibo giggled. 

”Yeah, he turned out to be a sneaky one...can't believe he kept it hidden from us for 9 months!” Wang Han clucked his tongue.

”Nine months!?” Both Da Zhang Wei and Qian Feng exclaimed.

“Wow...congratulations you two…,” Qian Feng raised his drink. “Another drink to that!”

They refilled their drinks for the second round.

“How did you tolerate this brat for so long, Zhan-Zhan?”

”We’ve had girls his age come on the show to perform with him and be turned off by his straightforward attitude. It takes a lot to impress him!”

”Well for one,” Yibo rolled his eyes and downed his drink. “They were boring and I was not interested in them. And two, my Zhan-ge likes me even with all my flaws. Right, ge?” Yibo turned to Zhan who was sipping his drink slowly.

”Yes, yes,” Zhan smiled in amusement and patted Yibo’s cheek.

”See!” Yibo looked at Qian Feng with a triumphant grin.

”Yibo, ah Yibo!” Qian Feng shook his head and laughed. “Did you know, Zhan...one time, Yibo told a guest that she was too chatty and asked if her parents found her annoying?”

”What?! Wang Yibo?! Are you even human?” Zhan’s eyes widened and he looked at Yibo in disbelief.

Yibo grinned sheepishly and nodded. 

”I was just...being honest...she also called me cold and aloof.”

”Ayaa,” Zhan chuckled and flicked his forehead. “You’re too much!”

”And one time,” Da Zhang Wei spoke, “Yibo did an entire segment with his fly open!!” He fell back laughing.

”Ge!!” Yibo screamed, mortified. “And I can't believe you guys kept that in the episode and didn't let me reshoot it!!”

Zhan couldn't help but burst into laughter. Yibo glared at him but softened when he saw Zhan light up with joy and ended up laughing at himself as well.

”I still remember when Zhan-Zhan came on the show the first time with X-Nine and introduced himself as the visual stunner of the group and then winked and gave the audience the finger gun!” Wang Han slapped his hand on his thigh and laughed.

”Arrghhh,” Zhan covered his face with both hands, “don't remind me of that...can't believe I listened to Chu Yue and Zexi!!” Zhan groaned.

”Awwww,” Yibo moved Zhan’s hand away and pulled his cheek. 

Everyone laughed at the red-faced Zhan and filled a third round.

As the drinks flowed, the stories flowed more freely. By the sixth round of Baiju, midnight was upon them and the group finally decided to call it a night. With several hugs and farewells, Zhan and Yibo left the apartment hand in hand and walked to the elevator.

Once inside, Yibo leaned into Zhan’s arms and rested his head against his chest and sighed.

”You’re drunk,” Zhan laughed softly and massaged his back.

”You’re perfect,” Yibo sighed once more and placed a kiss on Zhan’s chest.

”I love you,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s head.

”I love you more…”

”Not possible…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I made up the Yibo's fly being open story LOL everything else, though, is true.


	140. Right by my side

* * *

As they neared the end of July, Zhan and Yibo went through a flurry of Untamed promotions and interviews with Tencent, Paper, Highlight, Sina among so many others. The sheer volume and intensity of the interviews gave them very little time to adjust. They were still making silly mistakes. 

Like initially they would introduce themselves together with the ‘we’ adjective instead of individually, the way normal co-actors would do. At one of the interviews, before the actual interview began, Zhan almost forgot that the cameras were still rolling and definitely forgot that they were in public. When he was asked, by what he realized later was an obvious shipper, how long he and Yibo were together, he let it slip that it had been almost a year.

Thankfully, Yibo was quick to cover it up by saying they had known each other for almost over a year and then proceeded to remind him that the cameras were still on them. Zhan had been awkward as hell for the next several minutes. It didn't help that, once again, Yibo introduced them together as ‘we are…’ at the start of the interview.

During the tencent live with FanXing, their conversation steered towards more domestic topics such as Zhan’s cat. Yibo, who had always loved animals and wanted a pet, immediately thought back to his visit to Chongqing. But Jianguo was a shy cat and didn't warm up to him immediately. Zhan had warned him that might happen and that it took a few visits usually for Jianguo to warm up to new people. He made a mental note to plan their next trip to Chongqing soon.

”Is your cat clingy?” Yibo asked when Zhan spoke about his pet.

”Yeah,” Zhan nodded and then lowered his voice and added with a mischievous grin. “But not as clingy as you!”

Yibo was writing something on a card and it took him a few seconds to register Zhan’s words but when they did, it took everything in his power to control his grin.

When they watched fan videos, Zhan smiled at the love and affection of their fans. Yibo continued writing in the card, looking up only when he heard a very feminine and overly sweet voice coo Zhan’s name. He reeled in his frown when the female fan expressed her love for Zhan and scoffed at her confession. 

”What’s with your face?” Zhan chuckled when he saw Yibo’s expression.

 _Fuck._ Yibo cringed inwardly. _I guess it showed on my face. And I guess I am clingier than his cat!!_

Later, in another interview, the interviewer asked if the summer had caused any changes in their personal life. Both Zhan and Yibo pretended to think, looked at each other and pretended to think some more.

 _It changed my entire life, woman!_ Yibo concealed a grin. _But I can't say that and neither do I want to lie on this question._

 _Fuck, if only I could scream from the rooftops, I’d tell you how that summer changed my life, lady!!_ Zhan sighed. _But I can’t and I won't lie either!_

At the end, neither committed to an answer and the interviewer just moved on, much to their relief. 

Towards the end of the last day of their promotion interview spree, an interviewer asked them to describe the summer in three words. Yibo thought for several seconds and looked at Zhan who was also deep in thought.

”With all my heart…wholeheartedly…,” he finally spoke.

Zhan froze for a moment and then turned to look at Yibo who was grinning wide at the effect he knew his words had had on Zhan.

”Wowwww,” Zhan gasped and chuckled as he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and dropping his head forward to hide his blush.

He covered his mouth as he smiled wider and wider.

_Bo-di! You absolute brat._

Satisfied with the effect of his teasing, Yibo then changed to another word.

”Touching...it was quite touching…”

When they were done, they took their separate cars back to their shared apartment. Zhan got a text from his manager and his eyes widened immediately and he hurriedly dialed two numbers. First, his manager’s to make sure she wasn't pulling a prank. And then, Yibo’s.

”Ge? Have you already reached home?” A perplexed Yibo spoke as soon as he picked up the call.

”Bo-di.” Zhan spoke slowly, much in contrast to the fast pace his heart was currently racing at.

”What happened? You sound weird…”

”I got it…”

”What?!” Zhan could hear the excitement in Yibo’s voice.

”I’ll be on that music show I told you about…Our Song!”

”Fuck! You were so excited about that. You’ve been talking about how much you miss singing and want to get back on the stage!! Ge!!!”

”I know...okay...I think I’m almost home...I’ll see you in a few minutes…”

”Okay, see you soon!!!!” Yibo nearly screamed into the phone in his excitement.

Zhan clutched his phone after the call ended and bit its corner, in disbelief and shock. His heart was still pounding when he opened the apartment door. Barely had he stepped inside when he was pulled into a hug and found his body squished tightly against Yibo’s. After several minutes of holding on tight, both boys loosened their grips a little and Zhan nuzzled against Yibo’s neck and stayed in the warm embrace.

”I love you,” Zhan mumbled quietly.

”I love you too,” Yibo smiled and kissed his temple.

”I can't believe it...I got so lucky…”

”No, you’ve worked really hard for this...the movie...douluo...and now oath of love and our song...but…”

”But?” Zhan pulled back and looked at Yibo curiously.

”But you’re taking on a lot...you still have one schedule of douluo to shoot and that too on location...that’s a total of three drama series at one time...and the promotions for Jade Dynasty and Untamed aside, you’re also going to be neck deep in magazine shoots, profiles, brand endorsements….and then launching your own studio….are you sure you can manage?”

”It does sound like a lot when you put it that way,” Zhan chuckled. “But I think I can...I want this so bad...I’m going to work my ass off...plus I have a loving supportive partner with me…right by my side…,” Zhan grinned.

”Always,” Yibo smiled back and finally sealed their lips together.

Zhan smiled against his lips and walked him backwards, further into their home. He deepened their kiss, his emotions surging as his mind finally wrapped itself around the good news he had just received. Yibo welcomed Zhan’s tongue and matched its passion. He grabbed Zhan’s waist tightly as they walked into the bedroom, lips never parting.

They fell onto the bed, a tangle of lips and limbs, and laughed as they awkwardly adjusted their bodies until they were in a comfortable position. Zhan lay on top of Yibo and tasted every inch of Yibo’s mouth, drawing moans from deep inside him. As their bodies writhed together and knead against each other, Zhan’s hands fumbled for Yibo’s pants while Yibo reached for Zhan’s shirt.

Clumsily, with grins and chuckles and wet sloppy kisses, they removed each other’s clothes. When they were half naked, Zhan’s phone began ringing. With a groan, he bit Yibo’s lower lip and blindly reached for the device and silenced it.

”Ge! It could be important!” Yibo chuckled and nudged Zhan.

”Mmm,” Zhan grabbed Yibo closer and nibbled on his cheek and chin. “But I’m hungry…”

”At least check it once!” Yibo held Zhan’s face and raised an eyebrow. 

”Fine!!!” Zhan growled and with one final kiss, stretched out once more to grab the phone. 

”It's my manager...again...more texts…,” he muttered as he skimmed the texts, “the date for the final schedule of douluo...some more solo interviews...with star and bilibili...wow...grazia wants me to be on their first ever digital cover...and do a whole feature on me...fuck...the shoot will be in Abu Dhabi!!! Oh…”

”Wow, ge! That’s amazing...come here...we need to celebrate,” Yibo grinned and he pulled Zhan’s face back towards him.

When they were face to face, Zhan didn't close the gap. He bit his own lips and looked at Yibo nervously.

”Ge?”

”Ummm…so this shoot…”

”It’s a huge deal!”

”Yeah, but it also means I won't be here for your birthday…”

”Ohh…”

”I know…”

”It...it’s okay,” Yibo spoke calmly but his voice betrayed his disappointment.

”I...I’m sorry didi…”

”It’s fine,” Yibo shrugged. 

”I know we’d decided to spend the day together…”

”I can just tell my manager I don't need the day off anymore,” Yibo tried smiling, “she would be more than thrilled at that.”

”It’s okay, ge,” Yibo shuffled out from underneath Zhan and settled into his side of the bed. “I understand...of course...it’s your job…”

Zhan watched nervously as he saw Yibo’s entire enthusiasm drain from his body. He felt his own excitement drain out when he saw the innocent sadness that Yibo was trying to hide.

”It’s fine, ge...I’m just a little....upset...but I’ll be fine tomorrow...let’s sleep….those interviews really took it out of me,” Yibo smiled but it didn't reach his eyes.

Zhan lay beside Yibo and spooned him. He peered over Yibo’s shoulder but on seeing that his eyes were closed, he placed a kiss on his cheek and rested his head on his pillow. He held Yibo close and plastered his body against his back. He placed kisses on the back of his neck and tightened his arms around him.

"Sorry, didi...I love you," Zhan whispered.

When Zhan woke up in the morning, Yibo was not in the bed or at home. He rubbed his eyes and saw a note on the nightstand.

_Early morning shoot. Didn't want to wake you. Love you too._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All my info about the interviews and hints are from online translations and interpretations!
> 
> Introduction goof up  
> https://twitter.com/carrotpapapa/status/1238777608851996672 
> 
> How long are you together goof up  
> https://twitter.com/MACHITTAO/status/1238076481323991040 
> 
> When they were asked to give one word for the summer  
> https://youtu.be/1uKL5Ahx4Ws?t=364 
> 
> When they were asked how the summer changed their life  
> https://youtu.be/LX6DOmpWazE?t=129 
> 
> Paper interview  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uKL5Ahx4Ws  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fwimDDVyBe0  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gANChMZJH-g  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uKL5Ahx4Ws
> 
> Highlight interview  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LX6DOmpWazE
> 
> Star interview  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dheKrIQ-rkI
> 
> Bilibili interview  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiaqQTn1sLI


	141. The best summer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time wise we are at the end of July 2019.

* * *

Although Zhan felt lighter on reading the note, as the day progressed, his worry and guilt returned. Especially when there were no new messages from Yibo. He tried going through his day normally but Zhan was never good at compartmentalizing.

Nonetheless, Zhan was nothing if not a professional. He showed up for his solo interviews and did his job. In between takes, he kept checking his phone. Each time, there was nothing from Yibo. And each time, he would leave another line to check in or apologize.

_What am I supposed to do? This is such a big deal but so is Yibo’s birthday! His face...I can't forget how sad he looked when I told him I won't be with him on his birthday. Arrghhh!!!_

* * *

When Yibo checked his phone later in the afternoon, there were several unread messages from Zhan and a voice note.

> _Zhan-ge: Missed you this morning  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: How’s work going?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m sorry, Bo-di.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I don't know what else to say so I just wanted to share something with you.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’ve been working on this for a few weeks now and wanted to surprise you later on your birthday  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Might even record this later but the words are for you and only you  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m sorry I screwed everything up _

Yibo smiled softly as his chest finally relaxed after hours of remaining upset after their fight. He had been walking around with a grey cloud over his head all day but Zhan’s messages eased some of his heartache. Curious, he immediately walked to one corner of the set and played the voice note. Zhan’s voice began humming a gentle tune.

_Our memories are always special  
The future, blend in the crowd  
Remember and rewatch the old photos we took together  
Waiting for you to come back and remind me of the memories of the past  
Hearing you say a thing in that moment  
Please don't forget these years  
Remember the best summer ever  
Sparking nostalgia, longing for the beginning  
We’ll become more courageous on the road in the future  
Even blushing eyes on the familiar face  
Remember it deeply in my heart  
_

Yibo’s heart melted. Zhan’s sincere voice pierced through any residual disappointment and annoyance. He replayed the song over and over again, the words like a balm to his sadness. He stopped only when his phone pinged again and he saw another message from Zhan. 

> _Zhan-ge: Bo-di? Are you there?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Please reply, didi  
>    
>  Yibo: I’m sorry too, ge.  
>    
>  Yibo: I know you must have tried everything you could  
>    
>  Yibo: And I love the song...love it so much  
>    
>  Yibo: I love you  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I love you too, didi...so much _

Zhan breathed a sigh of relief but frowned as he read Yibo’s message over and over again.

 _Did I really try my best?_ Zhan’s frown deepened. _“Did I really do everything I could to try and be with him on his birthday?”_

”No, I didn't,” he whispered to himself.

Zhan made up his mind and dialed a number with a determined look on his face.

* * *

”You did what?” A stunned Yibo stood in front of Zhan later that night, his jaw nearly dropping to the floor.

”I. Booked. Your. Ticket. For. A. Birthday. Surprise.” Zhan repeated slowly with a grin on his face. “I fly out tomorrow and will be done by August 3rd...they were surprisingly accommodating.” 

Yibo stood rooted to his spot for several seconds.

”You’ve already taken the 5th off, you just need to take another 2 days off...I have it all planned...I’ve spoken to Han-ge...he said you can shoot for the TTXS segments once you’re back...it’ll be a little hectic and I will have to stay back after you leave for another brand shoot...but I...I think it will still be fun…,” Zhan began stuttering when Yibo still didn't say anything.

_Fuck. So much for being spontaneous, Zhan!_

Tears began forming at the back of Yibo’s eyes. 

”It’s just...I thought...you keep saying that you’re not good at expressing yourself but you’re always the one assuring me about our relationship and showing me how much you love me. I’m the one who doesn’t give you enough. But I want you to know that no matter how I may behave in public during promotions, or how busy work keeps me...I want you to know…”

Zhan felt two hands pull him hard and a soft pair of lips crash into his. He felt the lips envelope his and kiss him like he was the most precious thing in the world. He felt a surge of emotion pass from Yibo to him and shuddered as Yibo’s arms drew him closer.

”You talk too much,” Yibo whispered against his lips, hands now on his cheeks, when they finally pulled apart.

”Huh?” Zhan looked bewildered.

”You really did that?” Yibo’s soft voice asked.

”Of course...I’m sorry I didn't try harder earlier...how can I not be with you on your birthday, didi...never,” Zhan stroked the back of Yibo’s head.

”I’m sorry, ge,” Yibo stood up straight and wiped his tears. “I was being childish...work comes first...we could have celebrated my birthday a few days late...it didn't matter...you didn't have to…”

”You come first,” Zhan placed a hand on his cheek and kissed Yibo’s sniffling nose. “Always.”

”So what’s the plan?” Yibo smirked and wiggled his eyebrows.

”Well...you’ll join me in Abu Dhabi…”

”And…?”

That’s a surprise,” Zhan winked prompting Yibo to pout playfully.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Abu Dhabi photos that sparked this chapter’s plot for me  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhan911005/status/1158397986570940417 
> 
> Grazia’s first ever digital cover  
> https://twitter.com/dramapotatoe/status/1164723702144966659
> 
> Xiao Zhan’s The best summer song  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TYBt2S_MUZQ


	142. Treating him like a superstar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I just realized I wrote Dubai when I meant Abu Dhabi! Corrected that in the previous two chapters.

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Boarded?  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes! So excited!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I know it’s an overnight flight, but remember not to sleep on it  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It’ll be midnight by the time you get here and then you’ll be awake all night if you sleep on the flight. Okay?  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes, ge! I’m not a baby!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: You are! You’re my baby! _ 😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: _🙄 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Alright, I need to sleep...last day of the shoot tomorrow!  
>    
>  Yibo: Okay, see you soon!!_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Love you, didi  
>    
>  Yibo: Love you too, ge _

Yibo sighed and leaned back against his seat. His mind bubbled with excitement as the cabin crew announced the departure and he was almost not scared of take off. Almost. As the flight began taking off, he gripped the seat and imagined Zhan holding his hand. He kept picturing Zhan’s smiling face greeting him once he landed and reached his hotel.

Before he knew it, the plane had reached altitude and he was nine and a half hours away from Abu Dhabi.

* * *

Yibo turned on his phone as soon as they were allowed to once they had landed. He smiled when he saw multiple texts from Zhan.

> _Zhan-ge: Hope you weren’t too nervous during take off, didi_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: I’m done with work for the day and am back at my hotel with my staff  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: They booked the penthouse for me! _😉 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Sending you the address...you’ll love the place!  
>    
>  Yibo: _😃😃😃 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: You landed!  
>    
>  Yibo:Yes, ge...flight was fine...really exhausted  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Aww...come to the hotel...I’ll massage you until you fall asleep_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Promise?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Promise _

When Yibo’s taxi pulled into the hotel driveway, which was a seemingly unending road that led away from the main road and down a road dotted by palm trees on either side. Once past the line of trees, Yibo’s jaw dropped when he saw a line of water fountains next. They were of different heights and were lit up brighter than the night sky.

As the taxi made its way down past the dancing fountains, the road curved and they finally reached the hotel entrance. It was a grand turnaround with pillars and motifs and statues. Yibo’s eyes widened as he saw the sheer majesty of the hotel and the lavishness of it all.

He picked up his keycard from the reception and was relieved when he saw how exclusive and private the establishment was. There were no lingering people, no crazy fans, no peeking eyes, just professional hospitality and grandiose interiors.

He took the elevator to the penthouse and marvelled at how rich and fancy everything in the hotel was, down to the minutest of details. Zhan had mentioned he had the penthouse floor all to himself and that his staff was on another floor. 

_Wow, they’re treating him like a superstar!_

When Yibo swiped the card and entered the room, Zhan was nowhere in sight. Confused, Yibo checked the room number again and after triple checking, walked inside and explored the suite.

He walked past the living room and kitchen and dining area and found that the place had two bedrooms. He peeked into one and then the other, where he saw Zhan’s belongings and luggage.

He placed his bags down and pursed his lips.

_Where is Zhan-ge?_

He walked back out and looked around the living room. He made his way to the kitchen to get some water and it was then that he saw a note stuck to the fridge. He plucked it off and read it.

_”Gone for an urgent meeting. Will be back in some! Freshen up and relax till then. Love you!”_

Yibo frowned a little but relaxed when he saw the food and water kept for him on the counter. He drank some water and decided to wait for Zhan since he didn't like eating alone when possible. He freshened up and flipped on the TV and lounged on the comfortable sofa.

He glanced at the time.

_Almost midnight. So late for a meeting!_ Yibo pursed his lips. _It’s okay, Yibo...he’ll be here soon!_

* * *

Zhan bit his lips as the elevator made its way up to the penthouse slowly. He glanced at his watch again and again. 

_Fuck...it’s past 1...the meeting ran so late! But I couldn't tell them that there was someone waiting for me, now could I!_

As soon as the elevator opened into the penthouse floor, he dashed ahead, stifling his yawn. He entered the suite hurriedly but stopped when he noticed that the TV was on and that a figure sat on the couch, his back to him.

”Bo-di!” Zhan exclaimed but the figure didn't move. “I’m so sorry, didi,” Zhan walked over and circled the sofa. “I didn't know the meeting would go so long…,” he paused when he saw that Yibo was, in fact, fast asleep.

He looked at him, slightly annoyed at himself for not being there to welcome him, slightly amused at the way Yibo’s head was thrown back and his mouth partially open, and completely overjoyed at the fact that Yibo was here, in front of him, and that he would be the one surprising him this time around.

He sat by the sleeping boy and closed his mouth with a grin. He caressed his cheek and placed light kisses along it. He was about to stand up and take Yibo in his arms, when Yibo stirred.

”Gege?”

”Hey,” Zhan murmured and ran a hand through Yibo’s soft hair.

”You’re back,” Yibo sat up and rubbed his eyes. 

”I’m sorry, didi,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s shoulder. “The meeting ran later than expected.”

”It’s okay,” Yibo yawned and leaned and rested his head against Zhan’s chest. 

”I missed you,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s head with a smile. “Let’s go inside...you need rest...and a massage...you must be exhausted after that long flight...”

”Mmm,” Yibo nodded, “no need for the massage though...you’re tired too…”

”This is the start of your birthday celebrations, Bo-di,” Zhan grinned as his hands massaged Yibo’s back gently. 

Yibo smiled and felt himself drifting off under Zhan’s soothing voice and relaxing hands. He let Zhan lead him into the bedroom and onto the bed. When Yibo laid down, Zhan leaned over him and took his lips in his. He kissed him lovingly and Yibo sighed into it as their bodies pressed closer.

”Come on,” Zhan pulled away and placed one final kiss on his chin. “I’ll give you that massage I promised.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Abu Dhabi photos that sparked this chapter’s plot for me -  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhan911005/status/1158397986570940417
> 
> The Bazaar profile -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWLM1U9R_vM


	143. He is a natural

* * *

When Yibo woke up in the morning, the sun was shining bright, his body was loose and relaxed, and the space beside him was empty. He pouted and rolled over onto his other side but paused in semi shock when he saw Zhan, on his knees, smiling at him.

”Ge?”

”Happy birthday eve!” Zhan smiled brightly and held out a small cupcake towards Yibo. “I made this!”

”But it’s not my birthday yet…,” a still groggy but happily smiling Yibo sat up.

”It’s your birthday eve! And we are going to start celebrating your birthday!!” Zhan placed the cupcake on the nightstand and leaned forward and kissed Yibo.

”So what’s the plan?” Yibo asked when Zhan pulled away.

“Now it’s my turn to surprise you!” Zhan grinned mischievously. “I have everything planned out!”

”Wow!” Yibo exclaimed. “Okay, so what now?”

”Freshen up! I’ve made breakfast and there are more cupcakes! Then we will head out on our first adventure!” Zhan raised an arm over his head as if he was superman about to take flight.

”Okay!” Yibo giggled and stood up to hug the visibly excited Zhan. “No meetings today?”

”Just one phone call which I will squeeze in, don't worry….nothing like last night...sorry about that,” Zhan’s face dropped a bit.

”Hmm, it’s not a big deal,” Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and kissed his neck. “I’ll freshen up...I’m super hungry...didn't even have dinner last night.”

”I thought so when I saw the unopened food...it was because you were waiting for me, weren’t you?” Zhan held Yibo’s chin. “I’m sorry, didi...but I’ll make up for it. I promise. Come on, go shower quickly!”

”You have nothing to make up for, ge,” Yibo smiled affectionately. “And I can’t wait for the rest of today and tomorrow!”

* * *

Yibo sat in the passenger seat as Zhan drove the car to a destination that he refused to reveal to Yibo.

”So what did you tell your team?” Yibo asked as he munched on the snacks Zhan had brought along.

”That I wanted a day to explore the place with some friends who live here,” Zhan winked.

”Wow! I’m just a friend, huh?”

”A friend...with benefits,” Zhan chuckled as Yibo smacked his arm. 

”How much further…”

”We have to get out of the city to get to this...place,” Zhan grinned. “Trust me, it’ll be worth it.”

”We’ve already been driving for 45 minutes!” Yibo whined.

”At least it’s not five hours like _someone_ had planned during our last vacation,” Zhan cleared his throat and raised an eyebrow at Yibo.

”Point taken,” Yibo curled his lips inward and resumed snacking.

Another half an hour later, Yibo gasped as the scenery changed completely. He watched in awe as the buildings were left behind and only reams and reams of sand dunes remained. 

”Wow, this landscape is so beautiful...there’s just dunes everywhere the eye can see!”

”You haven’t seen anything yet!” Zhan beamed as he watched how awestruck Yibo was.

Yibo turned to look at him with narrow eyes but Zhan gave nothing more away. A few minutes later, he finally stopped and Yibo saw some men a few feet away, standing by open jeeps with some large cargo in the back wrapped in cloths. 

”Ah! Nice to finally meet you, Sean!” One of the men came forward with a bright smile and extended his hand.

”Nice to meet you! And this…,” he gestured to Yibo, “is the birthday boy…”

”Ah so it’s you who this surprise is for! Lucky boy!” The man grinned. “Is he your little brother?”

Zhan chuckled and shook his head. He looked at Yibo and quickly muttered in Chinese before replying to the man.

”Remember, didi...they can't know we’re a couple here as well...but don't worry...it’s just a matter of one day...okay?” Zhan smiled kindly.

When Yibo nodded, he turned and addressed the man.

”No no, not my brother...he’s my best friend and we work together.”

”Ah nice nice! Lucky to have a friend like you,” the man nodded. “Come on...shall we show him what he is in for today?”

”Go right ahead,” Zhan nodded excitedly and yanked Yibo’s arm and followed the man.

”I can't wait for you to see this!” Zhan nudged Yibo ahead and then took out his phone to record his reaction. 

Yibo peered over the man’s shoulder as he unwrapped the cargo that was tied to the back of the jeep. His mind couldn't make any guesses as to what the item could be. A few seconds later, his eyes widened in utter shock as the blanket came off and he saw what was under them.

”Is that an ATV!??!” Yibo screamed as the men unloaded it from the jeep. “Is that….oh my god…,” Yibo turned around to face Zhan who was laughing and holding up his phone camera. “..are we going to ride those on the dunes?!?!?!”

”That’s a dune buggy...very similar to an ATV,” Zhan nodded and tried not to jump at Yibo’s excitement to keep the video he was recording steady. “And yes...we are!”

”Oh my god, ge!!” Yibo switched to Chinese. “I fucking love you...I wanna kiss you right now…”

”Later, didi….,” Zhan shot him a warning glare.

Yibo grinned and nodded. He turned his attention back to the men who had now taken down all the buggys and were giving them a once over.

”So...do you know how to ride one of these?” The man came up to Yibo and smiled.

”I’ve ridden an ATV before….on a dirt track but never on sand,” Yibo replied.

”And he’s a professional biker too!” Zhan added proudly.

”Is that so!? Well, this should be easy for you!” The man patted a visibly embarrassed Yibo’s shoulder.

Yibo got on excitedly as Zhan continued to film him and the man gave him all the instructions he needed. He tested out the controls on the road and when he was comfortable, he navigated towards the sand slowly. Once off road, Yibo began to get a feel for the new terrain and when he was used to driving around slowly, he turned back and gave them a thumbs up sign. 

Zhan stopped taking the video and returned the thumbs up. Yibo came back to them and walked over to help Zhan get adjusted to his buggy.

With a lot of instruction and encouragement, a very nervous Zhan nodded when Yibo asked if he was ready to take it onto the sand. Zhan drove slowly and felt his breath hitch when he hit the sand. But soon, he was able to enjoy the experience as he felt the sturdy vehicle beneath him and felt reassured when it maneuvered on the sand easily.

”Go ahead, didi,” Zhan stopped his buggy and lifted his helmet off. “Don't wait around me...they’ll take care of me….go have fun!! Just be careful!! I need my boyfriend back in one piece,” he chuckled.

”Will someone go with him?” Zhan switched to English when he addressed the man.

”Yeah, don't worry...one man with him, one man with you...we’ll take care, don't worry!”

”Are you sure, ge?” Yibo looked a little hesitant. “I can stay with you if you’re still nervous…”

”Shut up! This is your birthday eve! I want you to enjoy this! We won't be able to do this back home! I’ll be fine...keep coming around so I can catch you on video okay?”

With a nod and a grin, Yibo slapped his helmet back on and took off with a flurry of sand.

”He is a natural,” the man gasped as he and Zhan sat watching Yibo zoom away.

”Yes he is,” Zhan smiled and nodded along.

_And he's all mine!_


	144. Are you here alone?

* * *

After several rounds of riding and stunting and Zhan nearly getting heart attacks watching Yibo doing that, Yibo finally returned to where Zhan was. Zhan had stopped a while back and was taking photos and videos of the beautiful scenery around them. It was the golden hour just before the sunset would begin and he wanted to take full advantage of it.

”Ride with me once, ge? Before it gets dark?” Yibo asked in anticipation. “You need to experience it in all its glory at least once!”

”Umm…,” Zhan hesitated but seeing the hope and excitement on Yibo’s face, he nodded.

They put their helmets on and Zhan got on behind Yibo carefully.

”Hold on tight, ge...this is just like riding with me on my bike!”

Zhan did as he was told and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s waist. With a nod to the owner, they took off and Zhan couldn't help but scream in delight as Yibo took him for the ride of his life.

_So this is what this is supposed to feel like!_ Zhan chuckled. _I am so useless at these things. He’s so brave. Look at him go!_

They sped around the dunes for several more minutes until Yibo stopped them on the other side of one. Yibo hurriedly took off his helmet and gestured to Zhan to do the same. He looked around quickly and before Zhan knew what was happening he leaned in and crashed their lips together.

”Mmm,” Yibo hummed as he lapped at Zhan hungrily before pulling away. “Fuck, ge...this was...this is perfect. Thank you so much!”

”Didi!!” Zhan exclaimed and chuckled. “Enough...we need to be careful...and don't thank me!”

”I love you,” he grinned before wearing his helmet once again.

Zhan shook his head and laughed. When they took off again, he let himself lean back and enjoy the warm desert wind as Yibo led him back safely and soundly.

* * *

Yibo hadn't stopped raving about and reliving all his moves and stunts the whole car ride back. Zhan chuckled and gasped as he recounted everything he did and watched his reactions when he went through the videos Zhan had recorded of him.

”This was the best gift, ge,” Yibo sighed finally and leaned back against his seat.

”This was just your birthday eve gift,” Zhan shrugged and turned the car into the hotel driveway. “Don't go all tired on me just yet, Bo-di...there’s more.”

”Can’t wait!” Yibo exclaimed.

They headed up to their suite and as soon as they were in the elevator, Yibo pinned Zhan against the wall and devoured his lips. Zhan smiled as Yibo sealed their lips together and explored him inside out with his tongue.

”Fuck, ge...you’re the best,” Yibo breathed heavily as he bit on Zhan’s lower lip. 

”Shh…,” Zhan pushed him away as the elevator pinged open, “control yourself, Bo-di...there’s one more thing we need to do tonight before we can…,” Zhan licked his lips and smirked, "...do this..."

”What’s that?” Yibo followed Zhan into the suite.

”You’ll know soon enough…,” Zhan took his shirt off and went into the shower.

”Wait, lemme join you!” Yibo tore his clothes off and rushed ahead.

”Nope,” Zhan wiggled his finger and slid the door shut. “Can’t do anything...or it’ll spoil the game…”

”Game? What game?” Yibo whined as Zhan shut the door completely.

He groaned as Zhan didn't respond and the shower turned on. When Zhan was done, he emerged from the steaming shower with nothing but a towel tucked around his lower body. 

”Are you serious? You expect me to do nothing when you’re walking around like _that_?” Yibo grunted and made a move to get closer to Zhan.

”After the...game, didi,” Zhan spoke sweetly and stepped out of Yibo’s range. “Trust me. Now go shower...”

With a frustrated groan, Yibo stomped into the shower much to Zhan’s amusement. When he came out, though, Zhan was nowhere in sight.

_He better not be in a long meeting again._ Yibo frowned.

His curiosity was piqued when he saw a suit laid out for him. 

_Oh! Guess we’re going somewhere fancy for dinner!_

Once Yibo was ready, he stood in front of the mirror and adjusted his bowtie. It was then that he noticed the note stuck on the glass.

_Yibo. Professional biker. 22. Single._

Yibo frowned as he tried to make sense of the note. After reading it over and over again, he gave up. He walked over to where his shiny new shoes were kept and sat down on the diwan to wear them. There, he saw another note.

_Your goal is to win the prize that you set your eyes on when you come downstairs to the restaurant._

Yibo scrunched his eyebrows.

_Prize? What’s the game?_

He shrugged and stood up, dusting his suit and smoothening it, before leaving the suite for the restaurant and bar Zhan had told him about when they returned from the dunes.

When he got to the place, an employee greeted him at the entrance.

”Good evening, sir,” he smiled respectfully. “May I have your name, please?”

”Yibo,” he replied, suddenly remembering the note which had only mentioned his first name.

”Oh, yes! Welcome, sir...how was your racing practise today? It’s such a pleasure to host a professional biker...will you be participating in the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix?”

”I...uhhh,” Yibo blinked, confused by every word the man said.

_Who told him I’m a professional racer? Wait...it was on the note as well...is this Zhan-ge’s doing?_

”Not yet,” Yibo managed to reply with a confident smile. “But maybe one day!”

”Inshallah!” The man smiled kindly. “Yes, sir...one day, god willing, you will...and it will be our pleasure to host you again.”

With those words, he led Yibo into the establishment and then gestured towards the bar.

”You may have a seat by the bar, sir...while we get your private dining room ready…”

”Uhh...thanks,” Yibo bowed and watched the man leave. 

_Private dining room, huh….wow._ Yibo raised his eyebrows, impressed.

As he made his way to the bar, he noticed another man seated there with his back to him. He was suited up from head to toe and when Yibo got closer he recognized the tall, lean frame.

”Zhan-ge?”

The man turned around on his seat with a smug grin and eyed Yibo from head to toe, as if admiring his own handiwork.

”Zhan-ge...what was with the note…”

”I’m sorry?” Zhan interrupted him with a genuinely confused expression. “You must have me confused with someone else...hi…,” he extended his hand out towards Yibo with a radiant heart stopping smile, “I’m Sean….nice to meet you.”

”Uhh…,” Yibo’s mind blanked and he couldn't understand what was going on. “What…”

But before he could say anything, Zhan interrupted his stuttering.

”Are you here alone?” Zhan’s eyes wandered over Yibo’s body and he spoke in a low, deep voice.

It was then that lightning struck Yibo. He went over the words on the note again, one by one.

_Yibo._

_Professional biker._

_22._

_Single._

_._

_._

_._

_Single._

_._

_._

_Oh._

Suddenly, everything clicked into place and a smirk spread across Yibo’s face which was mirrored by Zhan immediately.

”Hi, Sean...nice to meet you,” Yibo took Zhan’s hand and shook it, “I’m Yibo...and yes, I'm here alone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yibo’s look -  
> https://i.ytimg.com/vi/w3gzAlMPvzs/maxresdefault.jpg
> 
> Zhan’s look -  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1204348436482547713


	145. I'm going to have him begging

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a note - I'm making this hotel as one of those fancy ones which values the privacy of celebrities and their high power guests, so they don't judge/care what the guests do which is also why they are exclusive and have private rooms etc for dining. Although homosexuality is not accepted in UAE which is why they had to be careful outside the hotel, the hotel itself caters to tourists and so is tailored to tolerate their influential international guests which is the case in many conservative countries.
> 
> In case anyone is interested in learning more about LGBTQ+ rights in the UAE. No hate intended, I just like being educated on this issue and love spreading the education as well.  
> https://www.wikiwand.com/en/LGBT_rights_in_the_United_Arab_Emirates

* * *

”Yibo,” Zhan repeated the name slowly, intentionally letting his lips hang on the O at the end.

Yibo wanted to lean in and bite those plump lips that stood still in a circle as if just waiting for something to be put inside them. But he swallowed his impatience and decided to enjoy the roleplay.

 _He remembered!_ Yibo grew excited at the unending possibilities of the night.

”That’s a beautiful name,” Zhan smiled. “Since we’re both here alone, would you like to join me for a drink?”

”Sure,” Yibo unbuttoned his jacket and took the seat next to Zhan. "So, are you here on vacation?”

”Not on vacation...I came here for work...I’m a designer…”

”Oh, really? Wow. What are you designing here?”

”I’m here to collect some items...you see, Yibo,” Zhan looked at the server and motioned him to bring two more drinks and then turned his eyes back to Yibo, “I love collecting beautiful things...and right now...I have my eyes on one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen….I’m here to collect it…” 

”Oh,” Yibo gulped as he felt his dick twitch at how low Zhan’s voice had become.

”What about you? Are you here for work as well?”

”I’m a professional biker…,” Yibo smirked, “...and I have my eyes set on a prize as well...I’m here to win it.”

* * *

As the drinks flowed, Zhan and Yibo played their role of strangers with full commitment, asking questions, making up answers. When the bartender informed Yibo that his private dining room was ready, he looked at Zhan and raised an eyebrow.

 _I’m going to have him begging for my dick by the end of this._ Yibo smirked.

”Care to join me, Sean?” He asked.

Zhan felt a shiver down his spine hearing Yibo refer to him by a new name. No Zhan-ge, no gege, not even a sweetheart. The name didn't have any familiarity or comfortable affection to it. It was new, it was different, it was alien. He couldn't attach any emotion to it. Just excitement and desire.

”Sure,” he smiled and was about to follow Yibo when suddenly Yibo placed a hand on his lower back and guided him to the room. 

Something shifted subtly, nearly imperceptible, but definitely there. A small change in the dynamic. Zhan felt himself slowly relinquishing control, letting Yibo lead for once. 

”Thank you,” Yibo nodded to the man as he led them into the private dining room.

”Here are the menus,” with that the man left them to each other.

Yibo pulled out a chair for Zhan, prompting Zhan to blush. After they were seated, Yibo feasted his eyes on Zhan who was preoccupied with the menu.

 _Always the foodie, even when in playing another character._ Yibo shook his head affectionately.

”There’s too many good options,” Zhan sighed.

”How about I order for us both?” Yibo took the menu out of Zhan’s hand. “So you can focus on me.” He stated, maintaining eye contact.

Zhan felt something stir in his groin as heat began spreading over his body.

”You’re pretty straightforward. How old are you again? You look pretty young…,” Zhan grinned, knowing it would rile up Yibo.

But to his surprise, it didn't.

”That’s not important,” Yibo leaned in and brushed a piece of lint off Zhan’s collar before smoothing it down, lightly grazing the skin on Zhan’s neck. “I like older men.”

Zhan’s heart skipped a beat.

”Oh,” he whispered and brought his drink to his lips, sipping it slowly.

Yibo’s eyes never once left Zhan’s lips that were now shiny and wet after the sip. When Zhan had put the glass back on the table, he reached out and wiped the droplet that had remained on Zhan’s lip with his thumb and licked it off his finger.

Zhan gulped and felt the heat in his body turn up from a gentle simmer to a warm flame.

Just then, the server returned, much to Zhan’s relief. If he had come a moment later, he would have probably seen Zhan lunge at Yibo and devour him. Or beg Yibo to devour him instead.

After Yibo had placed the order, they were alone again and the tension was palpable. For a few seconds, neither spoke. Yibo was about to say something when the server returned with their drinks and the appetizers. He grit his teeth but managed a polite nod. When the server left with a bow, he suppressed a smile as he watched Zhan eye the food. On a whim, Yibo picked up the chicken skewer and held up the juicy piece for Zhan. He brought it closer to Zhan’s lips that parted almost immediately to take a bite.

After Zhan bit one half, Yibo ate the rest and licked his fingers. 

”You always get what you want, don't you?” Zhan spoke in a low voice as he picked up another piece and bit into it. 

”Always.” 

Zhan felt the warm flame turn into a hot fire but he couldn't help but tease Yibo.

”And what if you don't get what you want tonight?” Zhan smirked.

”Not possible,” Yibo leaned forward and snatched the rest of the chicken from Zhan’s fingers with his teeth, biting Zhan’s fingertips.

”Ahh,” Zhan exclaimed softly and brought his finger to his mouth immediately and lightly sucked on the tip to calm the reddening skin.

The rest of their food arrived a few seconds later and Yibo couldn't help but smile again as Zhan’s face lit up, despite his obvious attempts to suppress his enthusiasm. As they began to eat, they spoke intermittently but otherwise ate in comfortable silence, eyeing each other occasionally.

When it was time for dessert, a molten gooey delight of a chocolate cake, Zhan moaned with pleasure as soon as he had the first taste. Yibo licked his lips as he saw some of the chocolate drip down Zhan’s lips and cover his mole.

Before he knew what he was doing, he swooped in and grabbed Zhan’s chin, tilting his face. Slowly, his tongue licked the corner of Zhan’s mouth and lapped up the brown silk. 

”Wha...what are you doing?” Zhan stuttered. “Someone might come in…”

”Don't care,” Yibo whispered back and proceeded to suck on the mole. ”The chocolate was covering your mole...and I couldn't have that, now could I?”

”Wh...why?” Zhan sighed as Yibo’s lips sucked on the beauty spot, so close yet so far from his own lips.

”I’ve had my eyes on it since I first saw you…it drives me crazy…”

Zhan couldn't tell if Yibo meant only that night or ever since they first met in reality. The sheer thought of Yibo lusting after his lips, the corner of his mouth, his mole, sent a jolt down his dick and the hot fire turned into a raging monster.

He let out a devastating moan as his mind whirled and Yibo stiffened for a brief moment before deciding to pull back.

 _Not that easy, Sean. You’ll have to beg for it._ He smirked inwardly.

Zhan caught his breath and looked at Yibo, confused and partly pouting with want.

 _Why did he pull back...is he...oh...he wants me to suffer a little._ Zhan bit his lips in realization. _Fuck._

* * *

”Hope you enjoyed dinner,” the man smiled when Yibo and Zhan emerged from the private room after finishing the rest of their dinner.

”Yes,” Yibo glanced at Zhan. “Very much.”

”Good,” the man bowed slightly and proceeded to hand Yibo a key. “Here is the key to your bike, sir.”

Yibo blinked and looked at the man, then slowly turned around and looked at Zhan, who was looking away purposely with a smirk on his face. Yibo’s eyes widened as it sunk in and he spun around and grabbed the key hurriedly. 

”Uh...yes...my bike...thanks!” His eyes lit up as he held the key.

”He turned around and grinned at Zhan.

”Wanna go for a ride?”


	146. With a stranger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Few notes:
> 
> 1\. No hate intended on the UAE! No society is perfect and there are many noble human beings there fighting for equal rights.
> 
> 2\. I went on for almost 50 chapters with the slow burn and the next almost 100 chapters are alternating between fluff, smut, and fluff again. For those who are bored of it and want angst, I suggest coming back in a few more chapters. I promise I'll get there at my own pace :)
> 
> 3\. Thank you for over 20,000 hits and almost 1000 kudos! This literally started out as a mindless venting place for my yizhan obsession but it's turned into a solid effort on my part to write the best I can!

* * *

Zhan stuck to Yibo like glue. His hands roamed his chest, his waist, his thighs and twice he felt Yibo slow down to savour the sensations. When they finally reached a secluded area, Yibo stopped and turned his head sideways to gesture to Zhan to get off.

Zhan placed one foot on the ground and swung his long leg around and dismounted. He walked around the bike to the edge of the barely there path and enjoyed the view of the entire hotel estate and fountains and palm trees that laid before them. 

They had taken an isolated road off the main one and rode around for a while, Yibo enjoying the feeling of the bike beneath him and Zhan plastered against him and Zhan enjoying the cool night breeze caressing his face and blowing through his hair.

Yibo walked up behind Zhan and snaked one arm around him, resting it on his waist.

”Enjoying the view?”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded and tried to not react to the warmth of the hand hovering just above his crotch.

Yibo spun him around and placed both his hands on Zhan’s waist and pulled him closer. 

”Me too,” he whispered, his lips barely an inch from Zhan’s.

Zhan tried to close the gap but Yibo pulled back just out of his reach with a smirk.

Zhan clutched the sides of Yibo’s jacket and breathed heavily. Yibo could feel Zhan’s breath, hot and heavy. His smirk widened as he saw Zhan gulp. 

”What are you waiting for?” Zhan murmured.

”What do you mean?” Yibo feigned innocence.

”Kiss me already!” Zhan grit his teeth and sighed in frustration.

”Is that all you want, _Sean_?” Yibo asked as his hands slid over the fabric on Zhan’s ass.

”You…,” Zhan clutched Yibo’s jacket harder and muttered under his breath. 

”Tell me, Sean...what do you want?”

”I…,” Zhan closed his eyes as Yibo groped his ass and nuzzled his nose up Zhan’s neck, inhaling Zhan’s scent. “I want…ahh…,” Zhan moaned as Yibo’s lips brushed ever so slightly against the dip where his neck met his ears, “...I need you to fuck me…“

”Told you,” Yibo whispered in Zhan’s ear. “I always get what I want.”

The next thing Zhan knew, Yibo had spun him around again, pulling his ass back into his erection, and grinding against it. Yibo’s lips massaged the vein on the side on Zhan’s neck and he couldn't help but throw his head back on Yibo’s shoulder to give him more access.

”So you want me inside you?” Yibo growled.

A sudden, unexpected thought crossed Zhan’s mind on hearing Yibo’s words.

_I want him to feel what I felt when we first had sex. I was his first and even though I can't give that to him physically...I can give him that same feeling emotionally._

”You’d be my first ever.” Zhan whispered as Yibo knead into his ass.

Yibo stilled. Zhan could feel his breathing grow shallower and his grip on Zhan loosened a little. Zhan turned around in his arms slowly. On seeing Zhan’s innocent blushing face, Yibo’s eyes darkened.

He pressed his finger into Zhan’s lower lip. Zhan tilted his face and kissed the finger. He licked it slowly, watching as Yibo’s eyes followed his tongue, before taking the finger in his mouth. He sucked on the finger and let out a moan when Yibo inserted another finger in his mouth.

Yibo felt heat rise from the pit of his stomach and spread throughout his body. He felt the heat burn his skin and all his blood rushed straight to his groin.

He pulled his fingers out of Zhan’s mouth and grabbed his cheeks harshly with the hand and pulled his face closer.

”Ever?”

”Ever…”

Yibo stared into Zhan’s submissive eyes and felt the heat surge harder and fiercer. He tightened his hold on Zhan’s face and then slowly moved his hand down to his chin, pinching it causing his lips to pucker, before sliding his hand down Zhan’s neck, stopping at his throat.

Zhan moaned softly as Yibo wrapped his big hand around the throbbing neck, and squeezed it lightly. 

”I’m going to wreck you for anyone else.”

* * *

”Fuck!” Zhan exclaimed.

His entire body thumped against the bike as he bent over it further and further with every thrust. Behind him, Yibo’s hot, wet breaths sent shivers down his spine. Their trousers lay on the ground, their jackets strewn somewhere nearby.

”Don’t stop, Bo-d...Yibo…,” Zhan moaned louder as Yibo pound into him.

”You feel so good, Zha...Sean,” Yibo groaned as he grabbed onto Zhan’s hips tightly and thrust into him deeper each time. 

Zhan clutched the back of the bike and dropped his head onto the seat. Beads of sweat slid down his neck and face as the heat in his body rose with every passing second. 

From Yibo’s point of view, he could see Zhan’s tall lean sexy body bent over the killer Yamaha sports bike that Zhan had got him for the night. Zhan’s long legs were spread wide and the soft, supple skin of his ass was trembling with every deep plunge.

Yibo growled at the sight and groped Zhan’s ass and slapped it mercilessly. He could feel himself climaxing with every moan Zhan let out.

”Fuck...Yibo...ahh...faster…,I’m almost...Yibo….right there….” Zhan begged.

With one final push, Yibo and Zhan groaned loudly and Yibo fell on top of Zhan as both their bodies went limp.

”That was…,” Yibo caught his breath and managed to stand up despite his weak knees.

”I’ve never done that before...with a stranger…,” Zhan smirked and turned around.

”Really?” Yibo smirked back and smacked Zhan's ass before picking up both their clothes.

And your bike’s a mess,” Zhan sighed and pulled out a handkerchief from his jacket pocket to clean the said mess.

Yibo walked over and turned Zhan around by his arms. He placed a hand on his cheeks and finally, finally, finally sealed their lips together. Zhan sighed happily and melted into the kiss and slid his hand up Yibo’s back to pull him closer.

”We better wear our clothes before someone shows up. We’re in the wrong country for such acts,” Zhan grinned when Yibo pulled away and pulled his pants on again.

”Mmm,” Yibo wore his pants and jacket. ”This is the best birthday eve ever.”

”Oh, it’s your birthday tomorrow?” Zhan acted surprised, still in character.

”Yes,” Yibo grinned at the feigned reaction.

Zhan looked at his watch and then placed a kiss on Yibo’s cheek. ”Actually, it’s your birthday now,” Zhan whispered and kissed the other cheek as well. “Happy birthday, sweetie.”

”Thank you, Zhan-ge.” Yibo replied softly and sealed their lips together again.


	147. Have some pity

* * *

After Zhan and Yibo showered together and Yibo had massaged Zhan’s ass that had turned red and sore after all the slapping and pounding, they crashed onto the comfortable bed.

Yibo pulled Zhan close and nuzzled against his chest, happy and content.

”What are you doing?” Yibo noticed Zhan was on his phone.

”Just posting a birthday wish for you on Weibo,” Zhan grinned.

”Show me!”

”See it on Weibo!” Zhan hid his phone.

Yibo picked up his phone and when he saw the post, he smiled warmly.

”That’s our photo from the Untamed shooting,” he turned around and kissed Zhan’s cheek. 

Yibo typed something out quickly. When Zhan refreshed the page he saw Yibo’s reply literally one minute after his post.

_My god! Thank you, Zhan-ge. And that bike photo needs to be upgraded._

”You should have replied a little later, didi,” Zhan clucked his tongue. “Our crazy cp fans might figure it out...it makes it look like you were either waiting online for birthday wishes or we’re together and you knew when I was posting.”

”More importantly, you need to post my new bike’s photo next time.”

”Yes, sir!” Zhan saluted Yibo teasingly.

Yibo rolled his eyes and looked at the post again, smiling. He noticed another response from Zhan and although confused, he replied anyway.

”Bo-di!” Zhan chuckled and looked at his phone.

He typed something and Yibo grew more confused until he saw Zhan’s reply.

_Ge! This is a fake account!_

”Oh, fuck!” Yibo smacked his forehead.

”My boyfriend doesn’t even know my own Weibo account from the fakes ones!” Zhan pouted playfully. 

”Oh crap...let me just delete…”

Zhan grabbed the phone and put it aside.

”Come here…,” he pulled Yibo close.

Yibo grinned and cuddled with Zhan again.

”So?” Zhan asked and kissed Yibo’s forehead. “Was it...everything you thought it would be?” Zhan bit his lips nervously.

”It was everything I wanted and more! The roleplay...the bike...the dune buggy….,” Yibo tilted his face up and kissed Zhan’s chin.

”Good,” Zhan beamed ear to ear before yawning. “Okay, I’m exhausted...that was one hell of a fucking pounding, Bo-di!”

”Sorry,” Yibo grinned stupidly. “I got carried away...I’ve never felt that way before...the adrenaline from the buggy and bike all came crashing down onto you,” he laughed.

”It felt good for me too,” Zhan pulled Yibo closer and kissed his lips. “Goodnight, sweetie….and happy birthday.”

”I love you, ge,” Yibo smiled happily.

”I love you so much,” Zhan kissed his nose and they drifted off into a peaceful slumber, wrapped in each other’s arms.

* * *

”I can't believe they let you take another day and half off...it’s going to be crazy tiring but it’ll be worth it, trust me,” Zhan spoke as they waited in line at airport security.

”I can't believe they let _you_ take time off...your schedule is going to be crazier than mine from now on.”

”The craziness begins from next week...I guess they wanted to let me have this brief calm before the storm.” Zhan laughed.

”So when are you gonna tell me where we’re going? You haven't even let me see my boarding pass yet!!”

”You’ll find out now anyway...you have to carry your boarding pass through security...here...”

Yibo hurriedly grabbed the ticket and scanned it for the destination. His eyes widened as he saw the words printed in all caps.

_Destination: Anaheim, California._

”Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh. My. God!! Are we going where I think we’re going?!”

Zhan grinned and nodded.

”Fuck, ge...fuck...this is awesome! Thank you! Thank you! I could kiss you right now,” he spoke in a low but excited voice but on seeing Zhan’s glare, added quickly, “ _but_ I won't!”

After a long 16 hour flight, they reached their destination early in the morning.

”Time zones are weird,” Yibo yawned. “We left Abu Dhabi in the morning and reached California in the morning only!”

Zhan giggled and shook his head.

”Two more hours and we’ll be in Disneyland baby!!!!” Yibo jumped in excitement.

* * *

The first few hours at Disneyland were spent with Yibo grabbing Zhan’s hand and dragging him in any and every direction. Zhan watched fondly as Yibo squealed at every ride, posed happily with every cartoon character, and marvelled at the small parades that passed them by.

”Zhan-ge! Let’s go on this ride!” Yibo exclaimed and dragged him.

After three more rides, Zhan begged Yibo for mercy and took a break.

”Go on...go ahead to the next one….I’ll sit this one out,” Zhan sat down and waved at Yibo to continue without him.

”Are you sure? I can wait, ge.”

”Have some pity on this old man!” Zhan grinned. “I’ll be fine! Go have fun!! It’s your birthday!”

Yibo nodded and dashed ahead to the next rollercoaster.

Zhan smiled fondly but then remembered to take some videos without Yibo in it for the vlog that he had promised his fans and that was now long overdue. All of a sudden, Zhan heard a sound behind him. 

Still smiling, he turned around, curious. His smile vanished immediately when he saw a group of Chinese girls jumping in excitement, gawking in his direction. Slowly, carefully, he looked behind him hoping against hope that they were looking at someone else. But there was no one there.

”XIAO ZHAN!!!!!!!” They screeched.

He shut his eyes and cursed inwardly.

_Fuck._

The next thought he had was filled with panic.

_Yibo! What should I do? I can't leave him here! But we can't be seen together!! Aahhhhrhghhg! Fuck it!_

With that, he stood up and with a quick bow and wave to the girls, made a dash for it. He pulled out his phone, hurriedly typing as he ran. He could tell the girls were chasing him. And somehow along the way, he bumped into more Chinese people. Pretty soon, he was being hounded by a crowd of fans and had to push his way through. Even so, he apologized profusely as he made his way through and when he finally emerged, with one final shove he made a dash for the park exit.

> _Zhan: Bo-di...don’t come bck here...  
>    
>  Zhan: There are som Chinese peple here and theyve spotted me  
>    
>  Zhan: They ar fans and I ned to run  
>    
>  Zhan: Be careful...I’ll see you at the htel...we can't be spottd tgther  
>    
>  Zhan: Sorry ddi! _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Xiao Zhan’s birthday post for Yibo  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/08/04/xiao-zhan-dedicates-birthday-post-to-wang-yibo-and-fan-girls-are-going-crazy/
> 
> Xiao Zhan’s vlog with the Abu Dhabi and Disney trip  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5BZ6H_yLjnM&list=WL&index=24&t=0s
> 
> The part about Zhan being found by a crowd of fans is true and he had to be escorted out of Disneyland (I'm not sure which Disney park he went to but I just put USA because I wanted them far away from China to eventually show his shock at still finding fans there). I'll try and find the article about this incident.
> 
> Update: found the links!
> 
> https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=924182147934103&id=922288468123471
> 
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/07/24/xiao-zhan-is-the-latest-celebrity-victim-of-sasaeng-fans/


	148. One day at a time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I see some confusion in the comments. The roleplay was Yibo's fantasy which he told Zhan in Chapter 131! Zhan just made it come true as a birthday surprise because he is the perfect fucking boyfriend!!

* * *

Zhan paced the suite anxiously. It was almost an hour since he had left the park and there was still no response from Yibo.

_What if he got lost? What if his phone died?! Oh my god, I shouldn't have just left him there!_

Just as Zhan was readying himself to go out and search for Yibo, the door opened and Yibo walked in. 

”Oh, thank god!!!” Zhan rushed forward and hugged Yibo. “I was so worried.”

Yibo didn't hug Zhan back but didn't pull away either.

”Are you okay? Did they hound you?” Zhan pulled back a little and placed a hand on Yibo’s cheek.

”No,” Yibo shook his head. “I managed to get away from the back exit. Didn't see anyone.”

”Good,” Zhan let out a sigh of relief. “Sorry, didi,” he looked at Yibo guiltily.

”It’s okay,” Yibo shrugged and finally left Zhan’s arms and put his sling bag on the bed before sitting down to take his shoes off.

Zhan eyed him nervously. Yibo seemed dull and aloof. He knew what he did wasn't okay but at the time he didn't have any other option.

”I’m really sorry, Bo-di,” Zhan walked over and knelt in front of Yibo. “But you know what would have happened if I had stayed, or worse if they saw us together. It would have been all over the internet.”

Yibo nodded meekly but kept his eyes on his lap.

”Hey,” Zhan lifted Yibo’s face to look at him. “Are you upset?”

”I just...I felt alone…,” Yibo whispered. “I know you had to...but it felt like...you just left me behind.”

Zhan felt his heart ache and he leaned forward to envelope Yibo’s lips in his. He kissed him gently for several seconds.

”I’m truly sorry,” he planted kisses on Yibo’s forehead.

”It’s okay,” Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and rested his head on his shoulder.

”I’m sorry this ruined your birthday,” Zhan gulped and held back his tears.

”It didn't,” Yibo pulled back and looked into Zhan’s eyes. “I promise. It didn't. I had such a great time. I’m not mad.”

”Well, you’re about to be.” Zhan tried to grin but only managed an awkward smile.

”Why?” Yibo’s eyes narrowed.

”I think...I think it’s best if we take separate flights back to Beijing. To be more careful...to avoid any run-ins with fans or the paparazzi at the airport here and when we get there. I'm sure by now the news would have spread that I'm here.”

”What?” Yibo asked in a blunt, emotionless tone.

”It’s the smart thing to do,” Zhan tried to keep calm.

”But…”

”Can you think of a better option? You know what will happen if we are seen together. There will be a thousand questions in all our remaining Untamed interviews...even our solo interviews… and the shippers will blow this whole thing up.”

”Ge…”

”You have to understand, didi,” Zhan rambled on. “I don't want to do this...but someone’s gonna have to be practical. I’m sorry...I don’t know what...”

”Ge!” Yibo exclaimed and clamped a hand on Zhan’s mouth. “I understand. It’s not ideal but I do understand.”

”Oh,” Zhan’s muffled voice said. 

Yibo removed his hand from his mouth and they both sat in silence and stared at each other. There was a dullness, sadness, even irritation in the room. Neither spoke for several minutes.

Yibo leaned forward and kissed Zhan. He didn't let him go and with every passing second, the kiss deepened and they clung to each other for comfort. 

”What else did you have planned?” Yibo spoke when they pulled back from the kiss.

”I...I wanted you to teach me how to ride a bicycle because I need to do that for an upcoming shoot.” Zhan grinned sheepishly.

Yibo chuckled and kissed Zhan’s nose in amusement.

”I am mad that I won't be able to do _that_...what I would give to see you attempt that.”

Zhan laughed and rested his forehead on Yibo’s lap.

”Oh and about your gift...you’ll get it a little later…”

”Oooo,” Yibo’s eyes lit up. “What is it?”

”I was going to leave it as a surprise but I want to compensate for what’s happened now…I...it’s a painting...by me…it’s not done yet but it will be soon...I’ll have time during the shoot….they want to shoot me painting anyway...”

”Wow,” Yibo muttered and knelt on the floor beside Zhan. 

He placed both hands on Zhan’s cheek and pulled him for another kiss. And another. And another. Until they were wrapped in each other’s arms. Zhan lay back on the floor and Yibo lay on top of him. 

They lost themselves in each other’s bodies. The clothes came off. Skin warmed skin. Moans blended together. Breaths became wet and heavy. As they writhed on the carpeted floor, they couldn't tell where one’s body ended and where the other’s began.

They drowned in their emotions. And the evening passed by filled with love, laughter, and two climaxes.

* * *

Later that night, they packed their bags and prepared to leave separately for the airport. Their flights were two hours apart and Zhan was to leave first. Before leaving, Yibo pulled him onto the bed beside him and forced him to cuddle, not that Zhan objected.

”I’ll see you in a few days...gonna head straight to the Hotel Indigo shoot in Xiamen.” Zhan held Yibo close as they lay together.

”Okay,” Yibo pouted as he played with the hem of Zhan’s shirt.

”I love you more,” Yibo sighed and hugged Zhan.

”Not possible.”

* * *

When Zhan landed in Beijing, his decision to travel separately was proven right. But at a high cost. As soon as he deplaned, hordes of fans and reporters crowded him at the baggage claim.

He tried smiling and speaking with them as amicably as possible. But that didn't satisfy them. They crowded his personal space despite the efforts of his manager and bodyguard. 

”Xiaoo Zhannn!!”

”Wei Ying!!”

”Is it true you were in Disneyland for a vacation?”

”Who were you there with? You girlfriend?”

”Are you seeing anyone? Do you have a girlfriend? Your fans want to know, Xiao Zhan!”

Zhan controlled his face and tried ignoring the personal questions. He hurried to his bags and when his team reached out for his bags, he refused and carried it himself.

Somehow, they made their way through the crowd to the car. What would have normally taken ten minutes, took twenty minutes. And even then the crowd surrounded his car.

_How did he do this all these years? How did he manage his fame and the invasion of his privacy? No wonder he is so distant and cold when he is in public. No wonder he never dated. Is that the only way to get through this? Is it even possible to hide a relationship and still have a meaningful relationship at the same time?_

Zhan rested his head on the back of the seat and sighed, massaging his chest to ease the anxiety. 

_One step at a time, Zhan. Take it one day at a time._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Xiao Zhan’s vlog with the Abu Dhabi and Disney trip  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5BZ6H_yLjnM&list=WL&index=24&t=0s 
> 
> The shoot where he rides the bicycle and paints  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4NHjRq-qKw  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iO50dU8rOs
> 
> Painting  
> https://66.media.tumblr.com/3c760d69d49f811dda2322e1ead9d337/1e578587d7e6ea26-1f/s640x960/1a72ceff0c43318bfc214121923febe0566a7540.png


	149. We can't have rumors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time-wise, we are now on Aug 8th, 2019. Also, this episode of Happy camp is linked at the end. I hope the chapter is still understandable even if you haven't watched it before. As always I focus on the emotions and my plot and haven't focused too much on the episode. But it's worth a watch anyway!!!

* * *

> _Yibo: “Where are you?”  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Almost there...got stuck at baggage claim  
>    
>  Yibo: Again?! Was it worse than after Disneyland?_😠 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: About the same, don’t worry...I’m fine...  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Oh by the way, I heard from Chu Yue...the case is moving forward  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: The lawyers are negotiating the terms but it’s also getting harder because now...I’m getting more work on my own  
>    
>  Yibo: Hmm, don't worry, ge...it will work out in your favour...don't stress yourself out  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yeah...alright, see you there in a few minutes_😘 

Yibo frowned at the screen. First, Zhan’s Xiamen shoot was extended by half a day which meant he would have to come to the Happy Camp shooting directly from the airport and second, he was hounded again at the airport which meant he would be even more exhausted and third, Wajijiwa was taking advantage of his new found fame and Yibo knew that made Zhan’s anxiety worse even if he didn't say anything.

_Zhan-ge is too nice for his own good. I wish I could just hug him and hide him from the world._

When Zhan arrived, Yibo fought the urge to embrace him and kiss his tiredness away. They bumped shoulders, clasping hands a little longer than necessary. Zhan cranked his neck and swung from side to side to loosen his body after the long plane ride.

”There you two are!” A cheerful voice called out to Zhan and Yibo.

They turned to see He Jiong, one of the hosts of Happy Camp, walking over to them with a big smile on his face. 

”I’m so excited to have the two hottest stars of the summer on the show...we're so honoured,” he winked and laughed.

”Jiong-ge,” Yibo laughed along.

”No no, ge,” Zhan blushed and shook his head. "We are the ones who are lucky to be here!"

”Look at you,” Xie Na, also a host on the show, joined them. “How do you get more handsome each time you’re on the show, A-Zhan!”

”Na-jie!!” Zhan blushed harder prompting all three of them to laugh.

”Zhan-ge really can't take compliments,” Yibo chuckled.

”Shut up,” Zhan smacked Yibo’s arm.

”You shut up,” Yibo smirked and with that they descended into a smacking contest, much to the amusement of He Jiong and Xie Na.

”This is perfect,” He Jiong chuckled. “Great chemistry. Good for the show.”

* * *

During the first game of the episode, the guests and hosts sat at a semi circular table and played a game that explained the garbage classification system. As was expected, Yibo was the most eager to win and Zhan shook his head each time he jumped up to participate.

Yibo smiled shyly when he was teased by the hosts and many times, Zhan and Yibo caught themselves at the tail end of the hosts’ jokes and teasing remarks. They laughed together, conversed quietly with each other, played around in their own little world and the best part was everything was allowed in the name of fan service. Well, almost everything. Zhan's heart skipped a beat when he noticed Yibo sneak his seat closer and closer to Zhan until by the end of the game they were almost shoulder to shoulder.

It reminded him of what his manager had kept saying ever since the Disneyland fiasco. 

_”Be careful of where you’re seen and with whom you are seen. We can't have rumors and gossip. It’ll tarnish your image. We need to keep it squeaky clean if we want to ride this wave of success and fame that’s coming your way. No dating, no girlfriends. And all this and future fan service is good for the shows but even that shouldn’t get in the way of your image.”_ She had emphasized.

Yibo’s manager had suggested something to the same effect when he had returned from his mysterious vacation. She had narrowed her eyes at him and reminded him of the importance of his brand and image. She had even given him the example of Zhan as a warning to not get stuck in the girlfriend rumor quicksand, reminding him of his own previous gossip situation.

So Zhan and Yibo had come to an agreement with each other that they would be more careful about the line between fan service and blatant couple behaviour. They had become better at avoiding mistakes such as speaking as a “we” rather than in “I”s, accidentally answering trick questions by their shippers, and schooling their facial expressions, although that one they never did truly master.

That was until they showed up at the Happy Camp shoot.

The shoot tore apart their resolve like it was a piece of paper. And it was all because of one person. Wei Daxun.

* * *

Yibo had never drank so much vinegar in his life than he did in the second game of the episode. Wei Daxun and Zhan being in the same team as each other while he was put in another team with Zhoucheng and Yubin was enough to make him jealous. But on top of that, Wei Daxun being all chummy with Zhan, getting handsy, giggling, nudging was way too much for him. And it showed. Right on his face. As was expected, when the show was aired their shippers had a field day with it.

But if Yibo thought he was the only one drinking vinegar, he was proven wrong in the third and final game of the episode. It was a more active game, where the guests had to jump through holes that were labelled by the type of garbage and they were asked to guess the correct disposal of several items.

Once again, they were in different teams much to Yibo’s exasperation. He was relieved, however, that Wei Daxun was not in the same team as Zhan, but he had missed a very important point. People from different teams had to try and stop each other from going through the correct garbage label and that involved getting handsy. And to Yibo it seemed like everyone was getting handsy with his Zhan-ge.

But what he didn't notice was that someone was getting very handsy with him in particular. Wei Daxun to be precise. But Zhan had noticed. And Zhan did not like it.

From always hovering around Yibo to coming between them, from grabbing at Yibo when his necklace scratched his neck to nudging and teasing him, Zhan’s blood boiled with every round. The last straw was when Wei Daxun and Yibo were trying to slide through the same garbage label and ended up completely entangled together, limb to limb, body to body.

If this was any other place, Zhan would have walked right up to them and yanked Wei Daxun off his Yibo. It seemed that this intent didn't go unnoticed by Yibo, who immediately looked at Zhan when they fell to the ground together. 

_Oh fuck. I know that look._ Yibo thought and began panicking. _Zhan-ge wants to punch Daxun-ge. Fuck. I better stand up quickly and put some distance between us._

__

After Yibo did that, Zhan calmed down but then on, resolutely ignored Yibo. It was only when, in another round, Yibo ran after Zhan and grabbed onto him to stop him from going through and winning the point, did Zhan burst into laughter and feel his irritation fade away. And again, as was expected, the audience went wild at their interaction and Zhan felt a brief sense of triumph that it was him and Yibo and not Wei Daxun and Yibo that were the original cp.

__

Once the game was done, Zhan and Yibo walked backstage discussing their dinner plans when an arm slung around Yibo from behind. They turned around to see a grinning Wei Daxun appearing beside Yibo.

__

”Hey guys!” Wei Daxun beamed. 

__

”Hey,” Yibo nodded, side eyeing Zhan nervously.

__

”Hey,” Zhan mumbled, glancing at his arm that was still around Yibo.

__

”How’s your neck, Yibo,” Wei Daxun inquired and proceeded to inspect the red part of Yibo’s neck with his finger.

Yibo was about to move out of his grip, when Zhan spoke up instead. 

”Actually,” Zhan moved Wei Daxun’s hand away, “you’re not supposed to touch an open wound...we need...he needs to clean it and apply ointment to prevent infection.”

__

”Oh...yeah...you're right,” Wei Daxun nodded thoughtfully and moved his arm away.

__

_Yeah right._ Yibo smirked internally. _Nice excuse, Zhan-ge._

_I can almost see Yibo smirking inside._ Zhan glared at the smug boy. _I am going to get him back for this. He is enjoying this way too much._

”By the way,” Wei Daxun lowered his voice and addressed Yibo when they turned a corner and were in an empty corridor, “Sorry I was sticking so much to you today…”

”What?” Zhan and Yibo both blurted simultaneously.

Wei Daxun cocked his head at Zhan curiously but then continued speaking.

”Yeah...umm...didn't you notice? I was kinda doing it to you too, Xiao Zhan but more so with Yibo…,” he grinned sheepishly.

”So you...knew you were doing it?” Zhan tried to keep his cool.

”Yeah...I was sort of doing it on purpose.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some Xiao Zhan interviews since we don’t have any new XZ content :(  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiaqQTn1sLI  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zo1ZW-22gGA
> 
> Happy Camp episode  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9ukx6L8-P8&t=7s
> 
> Love this youtube channel, follow it if you want yizhan content and analysis!!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7GpIKLMFBo&t=19s  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivwdz5uZPFA&t=154s
> 
> More fan analysis!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hAgKLazFrqc


	150. I'm so lucky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A sincere thanks to each and every one of you who leaves kudos and comments!

* * *

”You were doing it on purpose?” Zhan grit his teeth. 

”Why?” Yibo scrunched his eyebrows.

”Well,” Wei Daxun scratched the back of his neck. “You see...there are some rumors going around about me...and I needed to shift attention from that to something else…”

”What rumors?”

Wei Daxun looked around and lowered his voice to a whisper.

”About me and Yang Mi dating.”

”And how do we….I mean Yibo figure into all of this?!” Zhan exclaimed but then clamped his mouth shut on realizing how loud he was.

”It’s simple. You guys are the newest and hottest ship in town. People are analyzing each appearance you make and all your micro-expressions. They love you together! And I was just...getting in the way. This way, people are going to talk about me in your context and hopefully my fucking rumors will die down.”

Zhan and Yibo were stunned. They blinked several times and looked at each other and then back at Wei Daxun, thoroughly confused.

”Hopefully, the focus will shift from me and A-Mi to me getting in between you two," he chuckled. "You know....ship wise I mean."

Zhan calmed down and then tilted his head to one side and asked Wei Daxun.

”So are you really in a relationship with Yang Mi?”

Wei Daxun paused and hesitated at first. Then, with a deep breath and a small smile, replied.

”Yes. And I don't want anyone ruining that because it’s still new and we need privacy. Can you understand that?”

_Wow. You have no idea._ Zhan chuckled inwardly.

”But did you really have to stick with me so much, ge?” Yibo crossed his arms across his chest and frowned.

Zhan felt something in him flutter at Yibo's words and he felt happier knowing that Yibo minded it too.

”Sorry,” Wei Daxun bowed and apologized sincerely. “I got carried away.”

Zhan and Yibo glanced at each other and Zhan could read Yibo’s expression as if he had said it outloud.

_Forgive him?_

_Fine._ Zhan thought as he rolled his eyes and chuckled.

Yibo smiled brightly and then turned to Wei Daxun. 

”It’s alright...glad we could be of help,” he laughed. 

”And if you both ever need my help for your relationship, let me know,” Wei Daxun smiled.

”Our relationship?!” Zhan and Yibo blurted once again in unison.

”Wow, you both are so in sync...I mean...yeah...if either of you are in a relationship, I will be more than glad to help you out!” He nodded with an enthusiastic smile.

”Oh yeah...separate relationships...,” Zhan cleared his throat.

”Of course...uhuh,” Yibo coughed.

They watched as he walked away before glancing at each other and letting out a sigh of immense relief.

* * *

When Yibo had changed and was ready to leave, Zhan stepped into the dressing room.

”So...I have some bad news...I have to go for a meeting...with my manager...work stuff…”

”Another meeting? At this hour?”

Just then, some staff entered the room to gather the remaining props and clothes. Zhan and Yibo immediately became aware of their body language and lowered their voices.

”Yes,” Zhan pursed his lips. “Some problems with the Olay contract...Wajijiwa isn't…anyway...I’ll head there now.”

”Oh...it’s okay,” Yibo sighed. “You should sort it out. I’ll see you at hom...I mean I’ll see you later.”

”I wish I could hug you right now.” Zhan spoke in a barely audible voice.

”Imagine me hugging you right now, ge...and kissing your cheeks,” Yibo whispered as he stood a little closer, “and massaging your back,” Zhan hummed and let out a long sigh but still didn't smile.

”Hey,” Yibo grinned. “Guess my favorite number?”

”520?” Zhan finally smiled.

”Hmm,” Yibo smiled back. “520.”

* * *

After Yibo left, Zhan gathered his things and was about to leave when He Jiong and Xie Na entered the dressing room.

”It was such a pleasure having you today.”

”The pleasure was all mine, Jiong-ge, Na-Jie.”

”So...how have you been...I know you must be stressed...how is your case with Wajijiwa?”

”Jiong-ge? How did you…”

”News travels fast in this industry, Zhan-Zhan. But I think you are right in filing the lawsuit. I know of too many young aspiring singers and actors who get tied down by these monster companies who take advantage of their lack of connections and trick them into signing these impossible contracts. If you ever need any help, let me know.”

”Thank you, ge.” Zhan bowed as his voice trembled a little. “Right now,” he bit his lips, “they’re refusing to allow me to be the brand ambassador for Olay. This has been going on for several weeks now. But hopefully, it will get resolved soon.”

”Smart people know the good ones that are worth the fight. If Olay knows what’s best for their brand, they will stick with you through this.” He Jiong pumped his fist at Zhan. “Hang in there, everything will fall into place. Keep working hard and fighting through it all!”

”I think it’ll be cool if Zhan-Zhan would appear on your show, who’s the murderer!” Xie Na chimed in. “And Zhan-Zhan, if you keep working this way, I could even get you to be a part of the Spring Festival Gala in my skit!”

”Wha….Na-jie! That’s...is that even possible...young newcomers are usually not a part of….it’s such a prestigious event…”

”When I saw you here with X-Nine the first time, I knew you would be a star, A-Zhan,” she replied with a kind smile. “You are a very talented actor. I have seen some of your work, especially in the Untamed.”

Zhan felt overwhelmed with all the love and support. As he made his way to his next meeting, he couldn't but overflow with emotion and text Yibo.

> _Zhan: I love you, didi  
>    
>  Bo-di: I love you too, ge  
>    
>  Bo-di: What happened? Everything okay? Are you at your meeting?  
>    
>  Zhan: No, on my way. I’m just...so happy I met you  
>    
>  Zhan: You’re so kind, and caring, and loving  
>    
>  Zhan: And I’m so lucky to meet you and other nice people in this industry  
>    
>  Zhan: Like Jiong-ge and Na-Jie…  
>    
>  Zhan: But mostly you…  
>    
>  Bo-di: 😘😘😘  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m the lucky one...always  
>    
>  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, Wei Daxun, I used you to show how oblivious some straight guys were to the beautiful love between wwx and lwj and to the general gayness in the Untamed world LOL!!!
> 
> More random XZ content -  
> https://xz1005fanblog.tumblr.com/
> 
> Wei Daxun rumors began in August 2019 and became more concrete by December 2019 -  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/08/08/yang-mi-dragged-into-dating-rumors-with-wei-daxun-after-seen-hanging-with-female-friend-resembling-her/
> 
> Na-Jie Zhan first interaction on Happy Camp  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1220543243164712960?lang=en
> 
> Olay issue  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhvns/status/1232332187569016833
> 
> Not mentioned in the story, but around the same time, Yibo’s number was leaked  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/08/03/wang-yibos-cell-phone-number-exposed-by-scalpers/


	151. I have to go

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Good luck with the practice sessions, didi! I know you’re gonna win later!  
>    
>  Yibo: Thanks, ge! You’re going to watch it, right?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I will be home by the time the race starts! Don’t worry!  
>    
>  Yibo: I’ll feel more confident knowing that you’re watching from there even if you can't be here in person  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Maybe one day I can sneak in and watch  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Alright, my flight is boarding now, Bo-di_😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Don’t forget to watch!  
>    
>  Zhan: Of course not! Now go practice...and be careful! _

Zhan sighed with a smile and put his phone back inside his jacket. As he gathered his things, the squeals and giggles of his fans nearby began to increase. He had started to grow accustomed to it but it still embarrassed him a lot. 

As he stood up, the sounds turned louder and soon, the fans were beginning to move frantically alongside him. He frowned under his mask as he realized they would crowd the gate and decided it was best if he boarded at the end.

”Be careful,” he warned one fan who was about to trip over another’s feet.

”Thank you,” she blushed but then continued shoving her phone closer and closer. “Is it true you have a girlfriend, gege?”

Zhan tried to maintain his cool and waited behind, surrounded by the increasing crowd.

”They’ve all boarded, it’s our turn now,” his manager came to his side and put an arm around him.

He was led by her and his bodyguard but the crowd only became more restless and noisy seeing their idol leave. The questions became more frantic and louder with chants of _”don’t go, gege”_. He was barely able to take a few steps when the last boarding call was announced.

As he neared the counter and handed the staff his boarding pass, he was informed that his check in had been cancelled and the boarding pass was now invalid.

”But we checked in,” his manager repeated for the third time.

”Sorry, ma’am...we can't do anything...he is not checked in according to our system so we can't let him board. And our flight is getting delayed because of this...we have to depart.”

When his manager was about to fight again, Zhan placed a hand on her shoulder and shook his head. He walked forward and bowed to the staff member.

”We understand. I apologize for the inconvenience because of me.”

With another bow, Zhan headed back to the last row of seats in the corner of the gate area. He sighed and made his way through the crowd of now very elated fans. When he took a seat, he noticed his bodyguard trying to keep the fans and reporters at bay, he called out to his manager.

”It’s okay...they don't need to leave,” he whispered to his manager. “It’s not their fault...just keep them a few feet away so I have some semblance of privacy. They can take all the photos they want….I just don't want to have personal questions thrown at me.”

”We booked you on the next flight out,” she pursed her lips. “Sorry about this fiasco.”

”It is what it is,” Zhan tried to prevent his voice from trembling. “It’s fine.”

When she sat one row down from him, he took his phone out but frowned when it showed the low battery sign.

_Fuck. There’s no charging point here._ Zhan looked around. _It’s all the way over there. I can't move now or the crowd will follow me there too and cause more disturbance!_

As he began typing a message to Yibo, his phone died and Zhan cursed inwardly.

_I’ll miss his race._ Zhan could feel his eyes burn. _I can’t miss his race!_

* * *

Yibo rushed to his team when the race was over. He sat on his bike and took his helmet off, running his hand through his sweaty hair. He was beaming ear to ear as everyone came out of the pit to congratulate him. Everyone was elated and their spirits were high.

_I won. I finally fucking won!!_

Yibo felt like he had redeemed himself from his defeat a few months back. He pumped a fist in the air as he dismounted and gladly took photos with the crew and his coach. He walked into the room and with a long exhale, sat down on a chair and leaned forward, elbows on his knees, as his victory began to sink in.

He grabbed his phone but there was no message from Zhan. Before he could react, his team gathered around and began to dissect the race and relive every awesome moment. Yibo, still ecstatic, put his phone aside and joined the lively discussions and filled with pride as everyone recounted his achievement and perfection on every turn and take over.

The cheers and mania lasted for almost an hour and when Yibo emerged from the pit, his fans went bezerk. The shouts and hoots and shrieks overwhelmed him and he bowed and waved at every fan holding signs and posters. He finally felt like he deserved all the applause and good wishes.

Before the podium, Yibo took a quick glance at his phone but there was still no message. He frowned but before he could send Zhan a text, he was dragged away for more photos and eventually to receive his trophy on the podium

His mind kept going back to Zhan even as he stood at the topmost rung of the podium. 

_Where is Zhan-ge? Why didn't he message me yet? Did he not watch the race?_

Yibo couldn't help but look a little dejected but felt his spirits lift up again as he was handed his trophy. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't bring himself to smile or laugh as everyone congratulated him and asked to take photos of him holding up his trophy.

_This win feels a little empty without Zhan-ge to share it with. Did something bad happen?!_ Yibo couldn't help but think as he posed for more photos.

When he was finally done and returned to the pit, hordes of fans raced after him and tried to follow him inside.

”Please keep them out...I don't want them anywhere near the pit...this is a private area,” he requested to the security personnel.

Once inside, he found a secluded spot and dialed Zhan’s number.

_’The number you are dialing is currently switched off.’_

No matter how many times he called, it was the same message. Yibo began panicking but tried to keep his composure.

_I’m sure he’s okay. He better be okay._

* * *

As soon as Zhan landed, he was whisked away to his car while his team picked up the bags. They didn't want another crowding incident and everyone decided it was better to just minimize Zhan’s visibility in the public space to avoid any inconveniences.

Zhan thanked all the gods above for the car charger and charged his phone. As soon as he had some power, he dialed Yibo’s number but no one picked up.

_Oh my….is he mad at me….fuck...what happened to the race...did he…_

Zhan went on Weibo and much to his joy and relief, he found that Yibo had won and he could see the celebrations everywhere. He watched videos of the race and the podium and Yibo with the trophy. His eyes filled with tears as he watched Yibo crossing the finish line, pumping his fist in the air, smiling with his team, bowing to the crowd.

_He did it...he fucking did it! But...why does he...he doesn’t look completely happy._ Zhan noticed. _Is it because of me? Because I didn't call or message?_

He hurriedly typed out a message and sent it immediately.

> _Zhan: Bo-di! You won!!!!! Congratulations!!!!  
>    
>  Zhan: I knew you would win!  
>    
>  Zhan: Sorry I didn't call earlier! You have no idea how crazy it got  
>    
>  Zhan: My check in | _

Before Zhan could send the last message, his phone rang and he answered quickly.

”Zhan-ge!?” A worried voice blurted as soon as he had answered. “Are you okay? Did something happen? Are you alright?”

”Bo-di….yes I’m fine! Congratulations! I just saw you won!!”

”You _just_ saw?" The voice turned low. "You mean you didn't watch the race?”

”Bo-di...I…,” Zhan began hesitantly, “I wasn't able to...because my flig…”

”I have to go,” Yibo’s voice became cold and aloof.

”Bo-di...please...I can expl…”

But the only thing Zhan heard next was a click and then a heavy silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Xiao Zhan airport fiasco -  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/07/24/xiao-zhan-is-the-latest-celebrity-victim-of-sasaeng-fans/
> 
> Wang Yibo race videos -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpwV8K_r0kU  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Zb-JcfJjbY
> 
> Wang Yibo on the podium -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ygkdMvWiic
> 
> The documentary on his races and both the defeat and victory -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYZF3t733RY&t=571s
> 
> The entire Zhuhai circuit -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a35V2VZGXO0
> 
> Wang Yibo talking about his racing on TTXS is the 2019-08-25 episode in this playlist -  
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLUM8x224JrX_kJm3syb7Fz2zoNP6J-N0N


	152. I'll show him what stubborn looks like

* * *

Zhan stared at his phone in disbelief.

_Did he just...did he just hang up?!_

Zhan dialed the number again but Yibo didn't answer.

> _Zhan: Bo-di...call me back. Now!_

Ten minutes later, when there was still no response.

> _Zhan: Wang Yibo. Now._

_If he thinks he’s the stubborn one, I’ll show him what stubborn looks like._

With a determined grunt, Zhan video called Yibo. Again. And again. And again.

On the sixth try, Yibo finally answered and was crouched in one corner, phone really close to his face and spoke in a low voice as if he was surrounded by people and had only managed to find a partially secluded spot.

”What?! I told you I have to go...I’m in the middle…”

”Shut up!” Zhan interrupted him sternly.

Yibo was taken aback by Zhan’s tone and was suddenly at a loss for words.

”Never… I repeat… never cut a call on me like that… “

Yibo remained resolutely silent and stared at Zhan. When Zhan didn't flinch or say anything but just kept staring back at him instead, he sighed and looked away. Only then, did Zhan say something.

”I’m sorry, didi...I truly truly am. I can explain.”

”Fine. Explain.” Yibo looked at him once more and gave him an aloof look.

Zhan resisted the urge to scold Yibo again and kept his cool.

”I was stranded at the airport and somehow my tickets got cancelled and they didn't let me board. So I had to take the next flight out.”

Yibo’s expression softened just a tad.

”And my phone died right when I was trying to text you. Otherwise I would have watched your race on my phone if I could.”

”Why couldn't you charge your phone at the gate?”

”Didi...there were at least sixty maybe more fans there that were disrupting the staff’s work...if I had moved around again to find a charging point they would have followed me everywhere and gotten in everyone’s way.”

”Why couldn't you just tell your bodyguard to keep them away or your manager to charge your phone?”

Zhan fell silent and looked down guiltily.

”Let me guess...you didn't want to be rude or trouble anyone.”

Zhan remained silent but then forced himself to look up at Yibo who had a sarcastic side grin. 

”How nice of you.”

”Yibo!” Zhan scowled. “Don't be mean to me for being _nice_! I couldn't just push them all away….they were just taking photos and...I felt bad...”

”So you missed my race? You’re not nice...you’re too nice.”

”I thought you liked that about me,” Zhan replied in a meek voice and his eyes fell down once more while his lips quivered.

Yibo’s heart paused at the ache in Zhan’s voice. He felt guilt wash over him and his brain told him it wasn't Zhan’s fault as he went over the situation again and again. It was what it was. A professional hazard.

”I do,” he whispered softly. 

”You do?” Zhan looked up with innocent bunny eyes that were getting redder by the second.

”Hmm,” Yibo sighed again and nodded.

”I’m sorry,” Zhan bit his lips and there was sadness and guilt written all over his face.

”It’s okay...it’s okay, ge,” Yibo shook his head. “It wasn't your fault. I have to go now...I’ll see you tomorrow when I fly back. We'll talk about this then.”

”Oh...but I’m flying out for the last schedule of Douluo tomorrow morning and then Oath of love prep...don't you...uhh...remember?”

”But you just got back! And those shoots are for almost four weeks….I won't get to see you before then?” 

”What do you want me to do? Postpone the shoot? I can't be unprofessional.”

”But you knew my race in Zhuhai was on this day...you’ve known for months...you could have made your current schedule keeping that in mind...so we could meet...and celebrate...after my race...just for one day!” Yibo tried to keep his voice low.

”Bo-di...you know I can't do that...do you want me to work my entire schedule around yours…”

”I would have,” Yibo mumbled in a quiet voice and then looked away from the screen.

Zhan swallowed his emotions yet again and spoke just as quietly when he replied.

”I would never ask that of you.”

Yibo looked at Zhan and let out a long sigh. He ran a hand through his hair and Zhan could see him processing his words.

”You could have sent me at least one message...at the very least so I don't worry...and here I was thinking something bad happened…”

”I don't know how to deal with all this yet...it’s all new for me...not everyone has grown up with such a lifestyle...I’m trying my best to deal with it and adjust…”

”It’s simple...draw a firm line with the fans...the true ones will understand...and space out your work schedule...that’s all I’m asking for…”

”It’ll be the same when you begin shooting for the Legend of Fei...you’ll be gone for weeks and you also have your brand shoots and so on...how is it any different with me…”

”I keep breaks in between my shoots...I don't do it all in one go like you...I keep a balance between my personal life and work….”

”That’s not because of me!! That’s because you have to be here for TTXS!” Zhan exclaimed in frustration.

”Even if I didn't have TTXS, I wouldn't book myself back to back...especially now...now that I’m in a….fuck...you know what the problem is…,” Yibo’s tone flared.

”What…,” Zhan grit his teeth.

”The problem is you’re too nice for your own good….you can't say no...you want to please everybody and say yes to all the work that’s coming your way….and not push your fans away...wait...no, I take that back...you can say no...to me…”

”That’s not fair, didi...” Zhan tried to ignore the bite in Yibo’s words. “And you know how hard it has been for me to get to this point in my career….and I don't want to be a one hit wonder...I need to build on this success...I can't be picky just yet.”

”I need to...I’m tired,” Yibo groaned and looked down. “I’ll talk to you later,” he whispered.

”No!” Zhan thundered. “You can't just cut calls on me and run away from the conversation….that’s not how adults fight.”

”What are you trying to say? That I’m a child!!?”

”Well you’re behaving like one right now...running away from this conversation!” Zhan felt his irritation rise.

He saw the video blur and move around as Yibo walked away from his spot. He could tell he was trying to find another place to continue the conversation or perhaps yell louder.

Zhan heard a door open and then shut and it looked like Yibo was in some sort of storage closet.

”I am mad at you….and I have every right to be mad...and that’s why I want to walk away from this!!!”

”From what?!” Zhan’s eyes widened and his lips trembled at the ambiguous nature of the comment.

”This...this frustrating conversation…”

Zhan sighed inaudibly and in relief and then reigned his anger in and spoke in a slow steady voice.

”Well...you can’t.”

”Why the fuck not?”

”Because we’re going to deal with this like adults...not like…”

”Not like what? Not like a child?!” Yibo’s voice finally found the volume button and he exclaimed loudly. “Well then, why are you even dating someone that’s such a child!?!?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO here's my mental train - Yibo's a leo so he has a temper acc to me, Zhan is older so he has more experience in relationships. That's it. Just wanted to share my two cents on this chapter.
> 
> Also, I'm loving everyone's take on this fight. Just a gentle reminder to be respectful to each other's opinion. Love and kindness!


	153. That's not fair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Few things I wanted to say - 
> 
> I'm so happy seeing so many of y'all engage and share your thoughts, especially on these few chapters with their first fight! Love seeing everyone's opinions and personal anecdotes! Thank you for investing so much into this story and this plot!!! Motivates me to do better.

* * *

”“Well then, why are you even dating someone that’s such a child!?!?” 

”BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, YOU ABSOLUTE MORON!”

Yibo was silenced by the outburst and Zhan’s words but still glared at him at the insinuation that he was being childish. He breathed heavily as his scowl deepened and the glare persisted as if he was trying to burn a hole through the phone with just his eyes. Suddenly Zhan found himself trying everything in his power to control his smile, his temper immediately simmering down.

_He looks so cute when he’s angry and glaring at me like that. Fuck. I just wanna squish his cheeks._

”Are you….laughing…,” Yibo asked incredulously.

”No…,” Zhan replied hastily. “Just smiling...I mean...sorry...I couldn't help it…”

”What the fuck, ge...we’re in the middle of a fight and you’re….”

”I’m sorry, I just...you look so cute when you’re angry.” Zhan curled his lips inwards to suppress his growing smile.

For a few seconds neither spoke and just continued to stare at the screen. Zhan, controlling his grin, and Yibo, not controlling his frown.

”Sorry, sweetie,” Zhan pouted and spoke in a small baby voice. 

He saw the corner of Yibo’s mouth twitch. Encouraged, he went on.

”I’m weally wery sowie…” Zhan widened his eyes into innocent bunny eyes and parted his lips partially to show his bunny teeth, taking full advantage of his bunniness.

Yibo bit the inside of his cheeks in an attempt to suppress his smile and maintain his stern expression. But seeing Zhan’s cute face made it very very hard.

”That’s not fair,” Yibo muttered under his breath.

”What’s not fair?” Zhan made his eyes even bigger and feigned ignorance, knowing well the effect his cuteness was having on Yibo.

”Ge!” Yibo scowled but Zhan could see the tail end of a grin at the corner of his mouth.

”Didi,” Zhan pouted and puffed his cheeks, making a baby face.

Yibo’s face turned red with the effort it took to keep himself from laughing. But eventually, he gave in when Zhan batted his eyelids. His entire face broke into a bright smile and he chuckled with a sigh.

”Not fair, ge,” Yibo shook his head, his grin widening. “You can't pull out the bunny card when we’re fighting.”

”I know...I know...I’m sorry...I couldn't help it...,” Zhan nodded, “and I wanted you to be in a good mood for the celebration party they’re gonna definitely throw for you there. I didn't want you to go to sleep mad at me.”

Yibo’s face softened. 

”I’m really sorry, didi...I’ll watch the whole broadcast when they repeat it over the weekend and we can watch the whole race together over video and you can explain everything to me about the race and the techniques and your bike...I promise…,” Zhan looked at Yibo with hopeful eyes.

”Yeah,” Yibo nodded with a chuckle. “Deal.”

”I love you, Yibo,” Zhan leaned back against the couch and spoke softly.

”I love you too, ge…,” Yibo whispered, “sorry I...cut the call earlier.”

”Promise me you won't ever do that...it’s hurtful...plus I don't like going to bed mad...no matter what happens, as long as we talk it out, we can sort it out. Okay?”

”Hmm…you’re right...I promise…,” Yibo bit his lips and nodded.

”Good. Now go have fun...we’ll talk tomorrow, okay? And I’m really really sorry….” Zhan exhaled, feeling his chest loosen up finally.

”Okay,” Yibo smiled. 

”Love you,” Zhan puckered his lips and sent him a flying kiss.

Yibo pretended to catch the kiss and placed it on his cheek with a grin, prompting Zhan to giggle.

When they ended the call, Yibo hung his head forward and let out a long exhale. After several seconds, he lifted his phone up and went on Weibo. When he typed Zhan’s name, sure enough several fan videos popped up of him at the airport, him not being allowed on the flight by the staff and him waiting for three more hours at the airport. He could see Zhan looked distraught, exhausted, and more importantly, sad.

_Fuck. I was so selfish._ Yibo shut his eyes, irritated at himself. _I didn't even ask him how tired he was. He had to sit there for so many hours after his long day of work. And I...just went on about my race. I was so rude. Fuck, Yibo! You’re a moron! You know if Zhan-ge could have helped it he would never have missed the race._

Yibo immediately pulled up the chat with Zhan and typed.

> _Yibo: I’m sorry, ge….I was a jackass  
>    
>  Yibo: You must be so tired from all that harrassment and flight delays  
>    
>  Yibo: Get some rest...we’ll talk tomorrow...don't worry...I’m fine!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: And...are we fine?  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes! Of course...I’m sorry I was an asshole  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: No... I understand why you were so upset  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I should have tried harder...I could have tried harder  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Just...don't ever cut me out like that...please...  
>    
>  Yibo: Never.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Okay...goodnight_😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Goodnight...love you my cute bunny_😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan: _😋🐰 

* * *

When Yibo came home the next night, Zhan had already left. But there was a note waiting for him on the fridge door.

_Your belated birthday gift is in the study_ ❤️. 

Excited, Yibo walked into the room and paused with a gasp when he saw the finished painting on the easel. He walked towards it slowly, admiring it. It was of a sandy beach with boats and mountains in the distance. On the beach stood a figure that looked like Zhan and a bicycle and a cat. A little away from him, with hands in his pocket, stood another figure that Yibo could tell was him. 

On the stool in front of the easel, lay a card. Yibo’s eyes teared up as he read the words Zhan had written so neatly and carefully on it.

_Hello, my love  
Firstly, sorry...sorry I missed such an important moment for you  
Secondly, thank you...thank you for your companionship and your love  
The road ahead may not be easy but it’s filled with endless possibilities  
There will be many new stories that wait for us as move forward together  
All because of you, my shining star  
Love can last a long time, it isn't just a matter of words  
I will do better, I will do more, I will always do my best  
This is my new promise to you.  
Love, your bunny._

Yibo’s heart stilled. Tears flowed down his cheeks and he sank to his knees as he read and reread Zhan’s words. He grabbed his phone and typed through his blurry vision.

> _Yibo: It’s perfect, ge...the painting...your words...  
>    
>  Yibo: I’m sorry I made it sound like you didn't care about me  
>    
>  Yibo: You’re already the best boyfriend to me...you don't need to do more  
>    
>  Yibo: I am the one who has to grow more mature, and do better  
>    
>  _

Yibo kissed the card and found a place on their bedroom wall for the painting. That night, he fell asleep gazing at the painting and reminiscing over all the good times he had shared with Zhan ever since they met at the Untamed workshop. As he drifted off to those pleasant memories of their past, his dreams were filled with visions of their future.

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Bo-di, sorry, reception in these mountains is very bad!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m glad you liked the gift  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I miss you...and we both need to grow...together...and we will  
>    
>  Yibo: I miss you too, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: And don't do every single stunt...I’ll be so mad if you come back with injuries like when you were on location for Jade Dynasty  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: _😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: I’m serious  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I love you  
>    
>  Yibo: Ge!! _

Yibo grinned and shook his head.

_I bet he won't listen to me. So dedicated. I’ll just have to kiss all his bruises away when he’s back. God, I miss him so much!_

Several hours away, in a remote location for douluo, Zhan sat on a rock and let out a long happy sigh.

_I miss him so much!! Thank god this fight is over. It’s our first and last fight._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Zhan's painting (the second figure was photoshopped by fans over a brownish area in the painting that looked faintly like a person) -  
> https://66.media.tumblr.com/3c760d69d49f811dda2322e1ead9d337/1e578587d7e6ea26-1f/s640x960/1a72ceff0c43318bfc214121923febe0566a7540.png 
> 
> Another XZ interview -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqGfrkxC4M0
> 
> I’m not saying the angst is done, but I’m also not not saying the angst is done. I’m a slow build kind of gal so yeah. 
> 
> Also, to get situated, we are now past August 12, 2019.


	154. It was one fight

* * *

> _Yibo: How’s the shoot going? I miss you  
>    
>  Yibo: 25 more days till you’re back  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Bo-di! Shoot just got done. I’m heading to my room  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Don't do a countdown already!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It’ll make it all the more difficult_ ☹️ _  
>   
>  Yibo: But it is hard_ ☹️ _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Is it?_ 😉 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Zhan-ge! And yes...it is  
>    
>  Yibo: What’re you going to do about it?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Fuck, didi...I wanna see it  
>    
>  Yibo: Ge!?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’ll delete it, I promise  
>    
>  _

Yibo bit his lips. He poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue as he looked around the room for the best lighting. He turned off the tubelight and turned on the lamp. He shoved his pants down and lay back on the bed. 

He took a snap and scrutinized it on his phone with furrowed eyebrows. Not satisfied, he deleted the photo and angled the camera and his legs in a different position and took another one. He pursed his lips and deleted it again.

”Ughhh,” Yibo groaned.

He waddled to the bathroom, hopping as he removed the pants completely and turned on the lights once inside. He licked his lips as he noticed his partial erection. He imagined Zhan staring at his dick pic and jerking off and was immediately aroused to full erection at the mere thought. 

He swallowed the temptation to stroke himself and took a few more photos. He swiped through to find half decent one but to no avail.

”Is that what my dick looks like!?!” Yibo scowled.

He was about to turn down Zhan’s request when his phone pinged again. He opened the chat and nearly dropped the phone on seeing what Zhan had texted him.

”What the…!”

> _Zhan-ge: I’m hard just thinking of you, Bo-di….  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Your turn, didi  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m waiting… _

Yibo gulped as he stared at Zhan’s photo. His mouth watered immediately on seeing the erection and all he wanted in that moment was to lick the entire length.

He hurriedly rushed back to the bed and jumped onto it. He spread his legs and leaned back against the headboard. He wrapped one hand around his erection and clicked. Before he could second guess it, he sent the photo and waited nervously.

> _Zhan-ge: Fuck._

Yibo smirked as he imagined Zhan’s face on seeing the photo but he didn't have to imagine for long. His laptop screen lit up with an incoming video call.

”Fuck, Yibo,” Zhan’s low voice growled. “Show me.” He ordered.

Yibo angled the camera such that Zhan could see his entire length from his head to the tip of his dick. 

”Move your hands…”

Yibo nodded and began stroking himself slowly. He looked at the screen and smirked at Zhan who was eyeing his dick hungrily.

”Don't leave me hanging, ge,” Yibo managed to say as pleasure began seeping through his body.

Zhan angled his camera too and as soon as Zhan began stroking himself, he threw his head back with a moan, giving Yibo an unobstructed view of his entirely naked body from his throbbing erection, up his sun-kissed chest, to his elongated neck with that one long extruding muscle that drove Yibo crazy.

Zhan straightened himself once again and looked at Yibo. Their eyes roamed each other’s bodies as their hands moved faster and harder with every passing second. 

”Bo-di,” Zhan’s voice trembled as his hand slid up and down his long erection. “Fuck, you’re so hot…”

Yibo moaned as he tightened his grip around himself on hearing Zhan’s praise.

”You drive me crazy, didi,” Zhan breathed heavily. “You make me want to do bad things to you...all the fucking time.”

”Ge,” Yibo panted as he began reaching his climax. “Fuck….ge...I’m going to…”

”Me too,” Zhan’s breath hitched. “Come for me, Bo-di….”

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo threw his head back and exclaimed as he rushed to his climax and free falled into pleasure.

”Ahh,” Zhan moaned again and again, and Yibo watched him as he came with the most erotic, lewd sounds, his entire body going limp.

Zhan let out a long sigh and then looked at Yibo who was staring back at him. They held each other’s gaze for several seconds, before breaking into smiles.

”Can we do this every night for the next 25 days?” Yibo smirked.

”How about next time, you finger yourself for me, didi…”

”Fuck.”

”I could do it too,” Zhan purred and batted his eyelashes. 

”Really?” 

”Really.”

”Yes. Fuck, yes. I’ll do it.”

”Good boy,” Zhan grinned and sat up to clean himself.

He stretched to grab a tissue when Yibo suddenly noticed something.

”What’s that?” Yibo snapped.

”What?” Zhan asked back casually as he wiped himself down. 

”The mark on the side of your neck…”

”Oh?” Zhan placed his hand on the left side of his neck.

”No, the other side,” Yibo sat up after cleaning himself and looked at Zhan intently and frowned.

”Here?” Zhan touched the other side of his neck.

”Yeah,” Yibo’s voice went low. “What is that?”

”Wait, let me see.” Zhan came closer to the laptop and angled his neck to get a better look.

”Is that a fucking hickey?”

”What?!” Zhan exclaimed before devolving into laughter. “Nice joke…it’s an insect bite from today’s shoot…,” he explained casually as he lay back once again. “I guess I didn't realize it left a mark on my nec…didi?”

Zhan paused mid sentence and blinked in confusion as he saw Yibo’s expression change from a frown to fear to relief to something that made him look lost.

”Didi?!! What happened? Are you okay?”

”I thought…,” Yibo’s voice trembled and to Zhan’s horror, tears began sliding down his cheeks. 

”You thought?” Zhan looked at him, worried and bewildered. “What happened?”

”Nothing…,” Yibo wiped his cheeks hurriedly. “You should put some ointment on it.”

”I...I will...but what…,” Zhan froze when the realization hit him. “Didi...did you think I...that this was a...you thought this was a hickey….did you think I...cheated on you?”

Yibo looked down and didn't say anything but Zhan saw his cheeks glisten again.

”Didi...look at me…”

With a long exhale, Yibo looked up, eyes shining.

”Didi...why did you...you know I would never…”

”I just,” Yibo spoke in a barely audible voice but on seeing Zhan’s concerned face, he went on, “I thought you...yeah...I thought that was a hickey…”

”But why would you think that all of a sudden? Look at you...you’re shaking...you really thought I did something…”

”I don't know why...but for a moment my brain was convinced that you did something...I mean we just had that big fight and…”

Zhan looked at Yibo in disbelief.

”Sweetie...it was one fight...just a fight...it doesn’t mean that we’re….”

”I know…,” Yibo whispered, “I don't know why...I got scared for a minute...I’ve never had a…”

Zhan felt his heart ache like never before. He looked at the innocence and insecurity on Yibo’s face and all he wanted was to fly back to Beijing and hug Yibo and protect him from everything.

The realization hit him that Yibo was just 22. Yibo had never been in a relationship. This was his first relationship. His first fight. His first everything.

”Sweetie…,” Zhan whispered and felt his heart break into tears that slid down his cheek. “I’m so sorry I hurt you. It was just a fight. Nothing’s changed in the way I feel about you. Just like I know nothing’s changed in the way you feel for me.”

Yibo looked up and looked at Zhan as if trying to convince himself that Zhan meant every word.

”Bo-di...I’m sorry I can't be there right now...but trust me…there’s never going to be anyone else for me ever. Remember? It’s just you and me.”

”Hmm,” Yibo wiped his eyes and nodded. 

”Can I get a smile?” Zhan wiped his own cheeks. 

Yibo managed a small smile and nodded again.

”Good,” Zhan chuckled and sent a flying kiss to the phone. “Catch!”

Yibo grinned and caught the kiss and placed it on his cheek.

”I love you, you big idiot. Only you. Always.”

”I love you more, ge.”

”Not possible.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How many of y'all remember your first relationship fight ever? That shit hurted man lol and I still remember how insecure I became after it for a bit...like the illusion of perfect romance was shattered and reality hit plus you realized that the relationship is breakable unless you work through all the bumps, it's not a self smoothly flowing thing. Anyway, that's why I wrote this. Hope y'all can see it or relate!


	155. Who is this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you once again everyone! For your comments and opinions. Happy reading!!

* * *

A few more days passed by and Zhan was returning to his room after a long evening shoot when his phone rang. He glanced at the caller ID and smiled brightly when he saw it was his mother.

”Hi mama!” Zhan exclaimed. “How are you? How’s papa?”

”We’re fine but you will not be fine if you hurt Yibo again!”

”Huh?! What do you mea….”

”How dare you miss his race!?”

”Mama!! Did he _tell_ on me!!? I’m gonna...”

”You’re gonna what? Now you listen to me Xiao Zhan. You better get your act together and prioritize your life right.”

”Yes, mom...we sorted it out...I’ll do better,” Zhan groaned and rolled his eyes. “But how did you even know…”

”I called him to congratulate him on the race the other day and he sounded low and when I asked him three times, he told me. So don't go and start another fight!”

”I didn't start the figh….ughhh….fine!!” Zhan grumbled. “I can't believe you’re on his side.”

”He’s my son too, and you’re the older one.”

”Not fair! I’ll always be the older one for the rest of our lives!” Zhan pouted.

Zhan’s mother chuckled for a few seconds before speaking again.

”How are you, Zhan-Zhan?”

”Oh so now you finally remember your actual son!?”

”I miss you, when will you two visit us again?” He could hear the longing in her voice as she sighed.

”I’ll be back in Beijing in three weeks or so and after that I’ll be at home for one day before I’m off again for another two weeks.”

”Tsk,” Zhan’s mother reacted. “Where is the time for resting, relaxing, being at home, spending time with Yibo?”

”Mama,” Zhan spoke in a serious voice. “This is how our profession is. Yibo understands it too. But I will try and make more time. We’ll be spending time together in Thailand as well in a month!”

”I know I know...you’re both young and have so much more to achieve. Just remember, in the end, all that matters is who you have beside you whether you succeed or fail.”

”I know, mama,” Zhan smiled and nodded. “I love you.”

When Zhan ended the call, he immediately texted Yibo with a grin on his face.

> _Zhan: Sooo...my mom called  
>    
>  Bo-di: That’s nice...how is aunty? You done for the day?  
>    
>  Zhan: You don't know how she is? Heard you had a little conversation with her…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Oh _😝 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Yeah  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah...and she scolded me  
>    
>  Bo-di: Good, that’s what you get _😝 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Is that so? I’m gonna punish you when I get back  
>    
>  Bo-di: Can’t wait _😉 _  
>   
>  Zhan: _😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: _😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan: By the way, we’ll be going to a really remote part of the mountain for the next three days so I’m not sure how it’s going to be...they said there’s almost no reception there  
>    
>  Bo-di: Oh, okay _☹️ _  
>   
>  Zhan: I leave early tomorrow morning, wanna video now?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Yeah, I’ll be home in half an hour. Okay?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah...but you better be naked and ready when I call. I’m hungry  
>    
>  Bo-di: Deal_😘 

* * *

Yibo pursed his lips as he tried dialing Zhan’s number for the third time. Zhan hadn't texted him back or answered his calls all day.

_He should be back from the remote location by now...maybe he’s asleep...he must be tired….I’ll try one last time._

”Hello?” Yibo’s face lit up as the call was answered but paused mid-smile as an unfamiliar man’s voice answered.

”Hello?” Yibo frowned and looked at his phone to confirm he had called the right number.

”Who is this?” Yibo asked, his frown deepening.

”This is Qin Pengfei...I’m Xiao Zhan’s action director...are you,” there was a pause, “...Lao Wang?”

Yibo suppressed his grin for the pet name Zhan had chosen to save his number under.

”Umm...yes...I’m his...friend...where is Zhan-ge?”

”Oh good, we were worried about how we would inform his family…”

”Inform them about what?” Yibo’s heart began racing. 

”Oh no...don't worry…,” the man seemed to sense the panic in Yibo’s voice. “He’s injured...but fine...his arm got injured during a stunt. He’ll be fine with some rest. I just...I just thought we should inform his family. Can you pass on the message?”

”No!” Yibo heard someone exclaim in a groggy voice in the background. “Is that my mother? Don’t tell her. They’ll worry unnecessarily.”

”You’re awake!” The man seemed to respond to the groggy voice. “No, it’s not your mother...your friend...Lao Wang called.”

”Oh,” Yibo heard the voice mutter softly and then break into a chuckle.

The next thing Yibo heard was the shuffling sounds of the phone being handed over to the groggy voiced Zhan.

”Hello, Bo-di?” Zhan spoke in a tired, weak sounding voice.

”Are you alright, ge?” Yibo’s heart had not stopped racing. “What happened? Did you break your arm? How did this happen? I told you not to…”

”Shh...calm down,” Zhan chuckled. “I’m fine...I just sprained my arm.”

”How bad is it? Are you sure it isn't broken? Is there even a proper hospital there??”

”Thank you, yes I’ll rest...see you later,” Zhan spoke to the man who then took his leave.

Once he was alone, Zhan let out a long exhale and spoke again.

”Sorry, that was my action director. He brought me to the hospital near our hotel. It happened during the last shot luckily so we were done shooting at the remote location and we came to this…”

”I can't believe you’re more concerned about the shoot. How’s your arm, ge?”

”Didi,” Zhan said softly. “I’m fine. The doctor said it’s not broken, just a sprain. It will be fine in a few days. And before you ask,” Zhan added hastily, “...no, I am not doing any more stunts for the remainder of this schedule...yes, I am following the doctor’s order and am resting the arm and yes, I’ll be more careful next time. I love you.”

Yibo’s heart calmed down and he sighed with a grin.

”Fine…,” he rolled his eyes. “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Xiao Zhan was injured in one of his shootings. There was a photo of him outside a hospital with his arm in a sling. If I find it again, I’ll update it here!
> 
> UPDATE - Found the image of him with an injured arm!  
> https://www.instagram.com/p/B8gqIsiAfKC/


	156. Bring them back

* * *

Yibo felt a pang of jealousy when he watched the video Zhan had sent him. He hated how much fun Zhan seemed to be having without him, amidst the rest of the cast of Douluo on their final day together. The only thing that made it tolerable was that Zhan’s arms had healed and were okay. Yibo even chuckled when Zhan began dancing to the songs that were being sung as the group sat in a circle after wrap up.

_I hate that they’re getting to sit with him, sing with him, dance with him while I haven't seen him in such a long time! He looks so happy...I miss him so fucking much._

He closed the video and went back to his text with Zhan.

> _Zhan-ge: Last day of shoot, didi  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Sending you a video of us all  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Wrapping up any shoot always makes me think of our summer together  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: We all had so much fun on the Untamed set  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I don't think I’ll ever have that much fun on a set again  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Miss it...miss you, sweetie  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Can’t believe the Untamed is done airing all the episodes.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Time flies _

Yibo could tell Zhan was probably feeling pretty low. He knew Zhan felt every emotion deeply. And on reading his texts, Yibo knew Zhan was feeling lonely even amidst the crowd of his peers and friends.

> _Yibo: The show might be done airing but the memories are forever_ 😘😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Miss you too, Zhan-ge. A lot.  
>    
>  Yibo: 18 more days to go till I can kiss you again  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Can't wait_😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: You leave for Oath of Love tomorrow?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Tonight actually, shoot begins early tomorrow  
>    
>  Yibo: That’s a very tight schedule  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Tomorrow’s shoot is very light and it’s a modern drama so no more sitting in hair and make up for hours and hours...thank god!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I need this break from fantasy dramas!  
>    
>  Yibo: Okay message me when you reach your hotel tonight then  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Love you _❤️ _  
>   
>  Yibo: Love you too _❤️. 

* * *

”There you are!” Qian Feng called out to Yibo, who was sitting in one corner of the dressing room as the crew got the set ready for the episode shoot.

”What happened? You look dull. Are you feeling sick?”

Yibo shook his head, but kept his eyes glued to the ceiling as he leaned back on his chair.

”Everything okay? You can tell me, Yibo.”

”Just...just missing Zhan-ge…”

”Ahh, young love,” Qian Feng chuckled and patted Yibo’s shoulder. “How long has he been away?”

”He’s been gone for 11 days...17 more to go,” Yibo let out a long, dramatic sigh.

”Aww does wittle wibo miss his boyfwend!!” Qian Feng poked Yibo and teased.

”Feng-ge!!” Yibo squealed as he continued to tickle him. 

When Qian Feng left, Yibo took out his phone and scrolled through Weibo. He typed in Zhan’s name and waited excitedly for the photos and videos to load. But the first post that popped up, shocked him. It was a fancam of Zhan being crowded in at his hotel once again but this time the crowd was out of control and had trapped Zhan in the revolving door along with the rest of his team. 

Yibo grit his teeth as he saw the fans go crazy and Yibo could see Zhan trying to be patient and not let his frustration show. It seemed like the team had been stuck there for several minutes with the crowd showing no signs of backing off.

”What the fuck is wrong with people!?” Yibo exclaimed and scrolled as more fan videos cluttered his timeline with different angles of the same scene.

”Fucking idiots!!” Yibo growled.

”Wow! Language!” Da Zhang Wei’s voice startled a very angry Yibo. 

”Look at these fake fans...just look at how they’re harassing my Zhan-ge!!” Yibo shoved the phone in front of him.

”Oh, yeah! That’s bad!” Da Zhang Wei clucked his tongue. “Come on now, you can't do anything about that right now and we’re ready to shoot.

* * *

During the shoot, there was a segment where four actors hid behind doors and each female guest opened one door to see who they were matched with. As a task, the men had to recite the line they thought was the most romantic to the woman who had opened their door.

Yibo groaned when Wang Han winked and suggested that he be one of the four actors. But as Yibo stood behind the door, his mind kept thinking over Zhan’s plight. His airport fiascos, the never ending line of fans wherever he went, the hotel incident, and the crazy schedule. He knew Zhan had worked hard for this and he knew Zhan was right in going after his dreams. But he also couldn't help but worry for him. He knew the industry and the fan culture. He knew how they could treat you like an object and take advantage of you. He knew how being nice was a weakness. And his Zhan-ge was the kindest soul there was.

He worried for Zhan and all he could was be there. Be there in case Zhan ever needed someone to catch him when he fell. Just the way Zhan had when Yibo had failed the first time he competed as a professional racer.

Just then the door he stood behind opened and the girl blushed on seeing Yibo as the audience went bezerk. He walked out with an awkward smile and bowed to her. When Wang Han asked him what romantic line he had chosen to enact, his heart made the decision for him before his mind could even begin to think.

He raised the microphone to his lips and with the image of his sweet Zhan-ge stranded alone in the middle of a crazed crowd of strangers who only saw him as an object, a prized idol, he recited the most romantic lines he had ever had the honor of saying. He hadn't known then but he was saying the lines for his one true love. To the man who would be his partner for life.

”I want to bring someone back with me to the Cloud Recesses. Bring them back and hide them.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Douluo cast having fun BTS -  
> https://www.instagram.com/p/B9vCiyJgRes/?igshid=1ct5k6hv5hy9q
> 
> Xiao Zhan stuck in revolving door because of fans -  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/08/21/xiao-zhan-trapped-in-revolving-doors-by-fans/
> 
> XS Aug 25 episode in this playlist is the one I’m referring to where Yibo uses the Untamed line as a romantic line he would say to someone -  
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLUM8x224JrX_kJm3syb7Fz2zoNP6J-N0N


	157. So what are you saying?

* * *

Yibo came home tired and drained. He groaned as he fell back on the bed after a long two days filled with ad shoots and prep work for the Legend of Fei. 

”It’s so good to be home.” Yibo sighed as he hugged his pillow. 

He reached for his phone to message Zhan but before he could do so, the phone rang with an incoming video call.

”Hey,” Yibo smiled and dropped his head onto the pillow once more.

”Hi,” Zhan mumbled but there was no smile.

Yibo sat up as he noticed the bags under Zhan’s eyes and the weary look on his face. Before he could ask, Zhan spoke again.

”I think you’re right...I need two bodyguards...and I can’t always stop and talk to my fans any more,” Zhan spoke in a numb, defeated voice.

”What happened?” Yibo frowned.

Zhan lay back in his bed and curled up with his pillow, still looking very sad.

”Sweetheart,” Yibo spoke gently. “Tell me.”

”I had to run...actually run…”

”Are you alright? Are you hurt?” Yibo’s heart ached that he couldn't be there next to Zhan, spooning him, soothing him.

”I’m fine...but I’m so embarrassed. It was so inconvenient for the hotel staff and the guests in the lobby. They crowded me again and I wanted to stop it so others wouldn't be inconvenienced so I made a dash for the elevator. And they actually chased after me. Luckily hotel security stopped them from entering the elevator.”

”Hmm,” Yibo took a long breath and observed Zhan who was still looking away while speaking. “I know this is hard for you, ge...because you don't want to hurt or offend anyone...but it’s necessary...as you progress in your career, you’re going to have made some hard decisions.”

”Speaking of hard decisions,” Zhan finally looked at Yibo. “I’ve decided to launch my studio in a few weeks. If I want to be able to address such things and give them fanservice, I want to do it through the studio. I’ve assembled a small team to handle it and I’ll be using the logo I designed way back, remember?”

”I remember…,” Yibo smirked. “It was the first time you sucked my dick.”

”Wang Yibo!!” Zhan exclaimed even as he giggled into the pillow. “Yes yes, that time.”

”That was amazing, ge...both the blowjob and the studio logo,” Yibo chuckled as Zhan turned a beetroot red.

”And yeah,” Yibo went on, “you should really consider getting two bodyguards. It’s getting crazy here too.”

”What do you mean?”

”The building security guard told my driver that sometimes there are crazy fans here looking for ‘Wei Wuxian’...,” he chuckled. “It’s crazy.”

”Wang Yibo,” Zhan sat up with wide eyes, “that’s not funny. They know where I live? Did anyone see you?”

”I don't think so otherwise it would be all over Weibo.”

Zhan sighed in relief and bit his lips. 

”It’s only going to get worse,” Zhan pursed his lips and spoke more to himself than to Yibo.

”Yeah, that’s why getting two bodyguards is a good idea.”

”I’m more worried about you...and us.”

”I’ll be fine…”

”Yibo, if even one fan gets a photo of you at what they think is my building, it’s all going to blow up. The shippers will have a field day with it and our managements...are going to get suspicious.”

”So what are you saying? I’ll be more careful.”

”I’m saying,” Zhan looked at Yibo with a determined face. “Maybe you should stay at your old apartment for a bit.”

”What?” Yibo asked in a flat tone.

”Before you get angry,” Zhan spoke carefully, “just pause and think of the risk. You have fans following you around too. And you know, better than anyone else, that my situation with my fans is only going to get more intense too. Imagine if someone sees you at my building. If someone gets a photo of us there together. With all the scrutiny on our friendship in the media….”

Yibo looked aloof. Zhan knew he was doing what he always did. Preparing to run from the conversation. 

”Didi,” Zhan’s tone softened. “Talk to me. Please.”

”Are you asking me to move out?” Yibo looked like a kicked puppy.

”Of course not! I don't want you to take all your things and move out. You’re apartment is still furnished and has some of your things, right? We did that just in case of emergencies like if they needed to shoot you at home for TTXS, remember?”

Yibo nodded slowly.

”This is just that...an emergency...and temporary...and I won't be home for the next two weeks anyway so it’s not like we’ll be living separately while being in the same city.”

Yibo remained silent and Zhan could see him processing his words. He decided to wait patiently and give Yibo the time he needed. He lay back down and watched as his boyfriend’s face reflected all his feelings - confusion, hurt, and uncertainty.

”But what about after you’re back?” Yibu countered.

It was Zhan’s turn to remain silent. If he were to be honest, he hadn't thought this through.

”We’ll figure out the best way to keep it a secret that we’re living in the same complex, let alone in the same apartment.”

”And what will that be?”

”I don't know right now but that’s why we need to take this temporary measure so we can figure it out later when I’m back and not so preoccupied.”

”We’re never not going to be preoccupied, ge!” Yibo blurted. “I have Legend of Fei coming up soon in September, you have more shoots too. This is always going to be a risk….we knew this was a risk when I moved in. We knew this day would come!!”

”I know, didi...we will figure it out...to make sure this doesn’t get out...and…”

”And what if we don't...what if there is no way to guarantee 100% that I won't be accidentally clicked at our building!? Should I just stay permanently at my old place?”

”No, didi...I don't mean that...please don't be angry…”

”How can I not be angry? You’re asking me to leave my home!!”

”I am not asking you to _leave_ our home, Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed. “All I’m saying is for a few weeks...just for now...to be safe until I come back and we can figure it out together...you should…”

”Fine,” Yibo interrupted. “I’ll move out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Zhan’s elevator hotel fiasco -  
> http://www.dramapanda.com/2019/08/xiao-zhan-makes-dash-for-elevator-to.html  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhan911005/status/1164917776546324481?lang=en
> 
> If anyone wants to re-read the first time Zhan sucked Yibo’s dick :P  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/22343227/chapters/54406411


	158. On one condition

* * *

”Fine. I’ll move out.”

”Didi, you’re taking this all wrong,” Zhan groaned and dragged a hand down his face.

”I have to go, ge...I need to pack.”

”Wang Yibo!”

”Can we talk later, ge?” Yibo pleaded. “I don't want to get angrier and say something I’ll regret.”

Zhan took a brief pause and a deep breath. Deep inside, he had come to realize that he and Yibo were different in how they dealt with their emotions. Yibo needed time to process his feelings while Zhan wanted to talk about things right away.

Even though it was very difficult for Zhan to let the conversation go and wait, he knew that’s what Yibo needed. So with another deep breath, he nodded slowly and gave in. He would just have to wait in torture until Yibo was ready to talk again.

”Okay,” Zhan whispered, trying to keep the tremble out of his voice.

”Okay...thanks,” Yibo nodded back.

”I love you,” Zhan muttered under his breath and then cut the call.

* * *

Yibo remained silent as he stared at his homescreen. He swallowed back his tears and put the phone aside. 

_Why is Zhan-ge doing this?! Why is his solution to this problem to push me away?!_

Yibo lay on his stomach and hid his face into the pillow. His mind whirled with all sorts of thoughts and slowly Zhan’s words began to settle into his head. A part of him knew Zhan was only trying to be practical and do what he thought was right for them. But another part of him was scared. Scared that Zhan’s solution to all their problems would be putting distance between them.

Yibo went over all the possible scenarios in his head. If a photo of him entering or exiting the building leaked. If a photo of him and Zhan together in the building leaked. If a photo of him and Zhan on their balcony got leaked.

Suddenly, Yibo felt a chill rush down his spine. His mind jumped to all the worst possible outcomes and his heart skipped several beats. 

_Is Zhan-ge right? He can't be. Distancing ourselves from each other is not the solution. But he didn't say this is the solution. All he said was we need to play it safe for now so we can figure it out together when he comes back._

Yibo groaned and rolled over. He ran a hand through his hair and shut his eyes trying to silence his thoughts. Fifteen minutes later, he picked up his phone, having had no luck coming up with a better alternate apart from _’I’ll be really careful’_.

> _Yibo: Ge...I...thought about what you said  
>    
>  Yibo: I’ll stay at my old place for two weeks but on one condition  
>    
>  Yibo: I’m coming home as soon as you’re back so we can figure this out TOGETHER. _

Literally one second later Yibo’s phone lit up with a video call. With some hesitation, he answered the call.

”Hey,” Zhan blurted as soon as Yibo answered. 

”Hey,” Yibo mumbled and bit his lips. 

There was silence for a few seconds before both spoke simultaneously.

”Didi, I…”

”Ge, I…”

Zhan and Yibo stared at each other for another moment before breaking into small smiles.

”Didi, I am completely on board with your condition. I just...don't want something bad to happen to you while I’m not there…”

”I...I know...and I don’t agree completely but I couldn't come up with a better solution for now either so...I’ll do it…”

”The last thing I want is for you to leave your home, didi...but we’ll figure this out together…”

”Together…,” Yibo smiled and puckered his lips to throw Zhan a kiss.

”I love you, didi,” Zhan kissed the camera back. 

”I love you too, ge.”

* * *

”Wow, you have been looking duller and duller every day. Still missing your….special someone?” Qian Feng whispered as the staff hustled all around them. 

”I just...it’s complicated.” Yibo shrugged. 

”Hey,” he turned to the boy after the staff had left. “What’s going on? Are you okay? How are things with you and Zhan-Zhan?”

Yibo recounted the last few days. The craziness of Zhan’s fans at his building, Zhan’s suggestion for a temporary safety precaution, and Yibo’s move to his old place. 

”Wow,” Qian Feng smacked his forehead. “That _is_ complicated.”

”Yep,” Yibo popped the ‘p’ at the end of his reply.

”A-Zhan is right in his own way but I get why you’re upset, Yibo…but you knew this relationship wasn't going to be easy. Time to face the hurdles now.”

”Yeah, I guess…I just didn't think it would involve being apart.”

”But isn't it just so nothing happens to you PR-wise while he’s away and can't do anything to help you?”

”Yeah…”

”And didn't he agree to your condition of moving back in as soon as he is back?”

”Yeah…”

”Then stop sulking and get on board with this! You have to be a team. He can't feel guilty all the time! It may not be perfect or ideal but…”

”I’m homesick!!!” Yibo exclaimed in a whiny voice.

He sank further in his chair, pulled his hoodie over his head, crossed his arms across his chest and pouted.

”My old apartment doesn’t feel like my home any more…it never did.” Yibo mumbled from under the hoodie.

Qian Feng sighed and patted Yibo’s head.

”There there….come on, you big baby...there’s a surprise for you in this episode,” he spoke with a smirk in his voice.

Yibo peaked out from under his hood and raised an eyebrow. When Qian Feng gestured for him to follow him, he stood up, his curiosity piqued. When they were ready for the last segment, Da Zhang Wei and a few other people got together in a group and announced that they had prepared a performance.

Yibo stood by Qian Feng with his hands behind his back as he watched, trying to wait patiently for the ‘surprise’. A few seconds later, his face froze in a neutral expression when the band started playing a familiar tune.

Da Zhang Wei had prepared his own instrumental version of Wuji and hearing their song reminded Yibo of what he was doing all of this for. As the melody played and wafted around the set, his mind remembered how it felt to sing the song with Zhan. His heart felt every emotion he had felt with Zhan ever since they first met. His soul cherished all the memories and reminded him that that was what he needed to protect. 

_For the sake of this relationship, I will do anything. I won't let anything bad happen to us or come between us. Ten more days. Just ten more days and I’ll be back home. With Zhan-ge. And everything will be okay._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TTXS episode of Sep 1 2019 had Da Zhang Wei etc playing Wuji -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLUM8x224JrX_kJm3syb7Fz2zoNP6J-N0N


	159. They would create such a ruckus

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Hey, didi...just got some good reception! Wanna talk?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m free for some time  
>    
>  Yibo: Sorry, ge...in the middle of TTXS _🙁 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Oh...no problem...maybe later  
>    
>  Yibo: Guess who’s on today?  
>    
>  Yibo: Your mentor from X-Fire! Chris Lee  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Woah! It’s been so long since I met her _😮 _  
>   
>  Yibo: She’s a real badass, ge...she walks around like she owns the place  
>    
>  Yibo: She’s meant to be a star  
>    
>  Yibo: And she is so bold, doesn’t care what anyone thinks of her  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Reminds me of someone else I know _😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: _😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Okay, I have to go now...I’ll message you later, okay?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yep! Love you  
>    
>  Yibo: Love you too _

Yibo put his phone in his pocket and continued with the rest of the shoot. After they had shot each segment, he was about to message Zhan again to see if they could talk when a voice called out to him.

”Wang Yibo?”

It was Chris Lee, with a gentle smile on her face, walking towards him.

”Oh, yes yes,” Yibo bowed a little flustered at the enigma concentrating all her attention on him. 

”I just wanted to congratulate you.”

”Me?” Yibo tilted his head in confusion.

”Yes,” she chuckled and nodded. “On the success of the Untamed. You’re Zhan-Zhan’s co-actor from the show right? I recognized you immediately.”

”Oh!” Yibo’s eyes widened. “Yes, thank you for noticing me. Thank you,” he bowed repeatedly.

”That’s enough bowing,” she laughed and patted his shoulder. “You’re just like Xiao Zhan, too polite. It seems like you two have become good friends. That’s good.”

Yibo tried not to blush and nodded along, smiling awkwardly.

”It’s good he is making more friends in the industry and you seem like a good boy. Up until now his only friends were his X-Nine band mates. Do you know them as well?”

”I’ve met them briefly,” Yibo nodded.

”Ah good...I wonder how they’re doing...it’s been so busy that I don't get to catch up with them and their crazy shenanigans! They were a crazy bunch,” she smiled fondly. “They would create such a ruckus on set, especially Peng Chu Yue and Xiao Zhan!”

Yibo’s smile froze on his face. One part of him wanted to stop the conversation right there and walk away, but another part of him, the petty and jealous side, wanted to know exactly what she meant. 

”What do you mean?” He blurted before he could suppress this other side of him.

_Fuck, what are you doing, Yibo!? Do you really wanna make yourself miserable?!_ One part of his brain scolded him.

_I wanna know if Zhan-ge behaves the same way with others on set as he did with me on the Untamed._ The other part of his brain countered in a petty voice.

”Oh, just boys being boys,” she shook her head in amusement. “Always playing around, fighting, making up…some days they were stuck together as if they were conjoined twins!” 

Yibo clenched his fist and could feel the taste of vinegar in his mouth. He felt his heart break at the thought that Zhan fooled around set the same way as they had. His brain tried to placate him by saying that he knew exactly how Zhan felt about Chu Yue, he had even rejected him after all. But the next words crumbled his confidence. 

”If I didn't know any better, I would have thought they were two lovebirds!” She threw her head back and laughed.

Yibo’s nails dug into his palm and he was sure he had nicked himself on hearing those words. His heart began racing at the insinuation. His brain, once again, tried to remind him that Zhan had rejected Chu Yue. That the affection was just one sided and Zhan hadn't returned Chu Yue’s love. 

But on hearing those words, he couldn't help but think if Zhan had ever felt anything for Chu Yue in the past. And then his mind wandered into the dangerous territories of _’what ifs’_. 

_What if we had never met? Would Zhan-ge be with Chu Yue? What if Chu Yue had confessed to Zhan-ge earlier? Would he be dating him instead?_

”Anyway, I should be leaving,” Chris Lee smiled and gave Yibo a light pat on his shoulder. “Keep up the good work, young man!”

Yibo nodded half-heartedly as he watched her leave. When she was out of sight, he sat down on a nearby chair and rested his head back, shutting his eyes tightly.

_Stop it, Yibo….you’re just jealous and insecure. Long distance sucks. Earlier, we used to at least see each other every week. Now we’ll be seeing each other after a whole month and who knows what ge’s schedule is like for the rest of the year!!_

That night, when Yibo was on his way home and still waiting to hear back from Zhan, he found himself, against his better judgement, looking up Zhan and Chu Yue on Weibo. And what he found, didn't make him feel any better.

_There’s no way it can be as bad as I’m imagining._ He thought as he pressed enter.

But the first few fan made videos were enough to topple his self consolation. He clutched his phone tighter with every passing second as he watched videos of Zhan and Chu Yue jumping around together, joking while sitting side by side for interviews, goofing around during games, singing and dancing in their dorm room. 

His eyes widened when Zhan walked into the room and saw Chu Yue half naked and proceeded to laugh and point the camera at him. His eyes felt like they would pop out of their sockets when he saw Chu Yue, in one video, launch himself at Zhan and encase him in his arms while nuzzling into his neck, possibly kissing his ear.

Yibo shut his phone and threw it aside and rubbed his forehead.

_What the fuck is wrong with you? Why would you watch that?_

But every time he closed his eyes, all he could see was Chu Yue hugging and pecking at Zhan.

_Nothing’s wrong with me! Why is Zhan-ge so close to him!? Why didn't he tell me they were this close!_

He opened his eyes and dragged a hand down his face.

_But you’ve behaved this way with your UNIQ brothers in the past too. This is all in his past!! And ge...he didn't even initiate any of these things. Ughhhh!! I just don't like anyone touching my ge!!_

Yibo grabbed his phone once again and typed out a message.

> _Yibo: I fucking miss you so fucking much._

_Four more days. Four more days._ He chanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TTXS episode on Sep 8 2019 had Chris Lee as a guest -  
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLUM8x224JrX_kJm3syb7Fz2zoNP6J-N0N
> 
> Chris Lee or Li Chun Chun was his mentor on X-Fire and they even came out with a song this year -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HX-IFySujEI
> 
> Peng Chu Yue and Xiao Zhan moments -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eLywh6ICKc  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8he2Kw1qpI  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4iLZOuE8CHI  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WciBV9zWmPo  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVGOqRm_OIw  
> https://youtu.be/5WeVzDQK658?t=152
> 
> I’m a huge fan of their musical collabs -  
> (x-fire duet)  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eF78_zB6uP8  
> (chu yue wrote the lyrics and xiao zhan sang this song)  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pu63wH7sfsM


	160. I see it now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are now on Sep 8, 2019 when Zhan did the Olay fanmeet in Suzhou and this is what he was wearing (goddamn XZ in leather, kill me why don’t you!?) - 
> 
> https://twitter.com/bozhanyizhan/status/1170582617596387328  
> https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=686729131802943  
> https://twitter.com/bozhanyizhan/status/1170613950607585280
> 
> This is what he's wearing in this chapter too, because I love the damn look and Yibo is gonna love it as well. I order him to.

* * *

_My old apartment sucks. I miss Zhan-ge’s place!!!_

Yibo frowned as he was lounging on his couch, playing a video game, when he heard a key turn in the door. He sat up, alarmed and nervous that someone was trying to break in. He picked up one of his skateboards and tiptoed towards the door, ready to attack the intruder.

As the door opened, however, he was taken back when a familiar face emerged from behind the door and paused on seeing him standing with his skateboard positioned in attack mode.

”Bo-di?” Zhan blinked as he placed his bag down slowly.

Yibo froze and stared, his brain unable to catch up with the unexpected arrival of Zhan.

”Yibo?” Zhan took off his leather jacket and called out again. 

“Sweetie?” He began taking a step forward when Yibo still hadn't moved and just stood there staring and blinking.

”ZHAN-GE!” Yibo nearly screamed and rushed towards him.

He ran at the wide eyed man and launched himself at an unsuspecting Zhan. Before Zhan knew what was happening, Yibo had jumped onto him and wrapped his arms around his neck and his legs around his waist.

”Wha….! Bo-di….? You’re home? I thought you were at TTXS.” Zhan laughed and dropped his bags, immediately wrapping his arms around Yibo to prevent him from falling.

They stayed in each other’s arms, wrapping tighter around each other, inhaling each other’s scent. 

Zhan walked in with Yibo, who refused to let go even after several minutes, still in his arms. He laughed fondly and massaged his back. Yibo buried his face in the crook of Zhan’s neck while Zhan planted kisses on Yibo’s shoulder. 

”I missed you so much,” Yibo’s muffled lips tickled Zhan’s neck. “I missed you so damn much.”

”I missed you too, puppy,” Zhan murmured as he sat down on the couch. "I took the earlier flight out from Suzhou and wanted to see you first so I came here straight from the airport."

Yibo placed his knees on either side of Zhan but didn't let his neck go. He nuzzled closer and hummed as Zhan ruffled his hair.

”It felt like you were gone forever.” Yibo mumbled.

”It felt like that for me too,” Zhan whispered back and kissed Yibo’s soft cheek.

Finally, Yibo sat up and looked into Zhan’s eyes. Zhan’s face transformed into the sun as he broke into the brightest, most radiant smile Yibo had ever seen. Yibo felt his entire heart flutter.

”Hey,” Zhan caressed Yibo’s cheeks.

”Hi…,” Yibo leaned into the touch and closed his eyes.

”Come here,” Zhan placed a hand behind Yibo’s neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

Zhan sealed their lips together and immediately deepened the kiss. Yibo grabbed Zhan’s shoulder and pushed further in, closer and closer until their tongues were dancing together and all they could smell and taste and feel was each other.

Yibo leaned forward until Zhan was pressed against the back of the couch. The kiss turned desperate and frantic and Yibo’s tongue licked all of Zhan’s mouth until Zhan was moaning with pleasure and longing.

Both felt hunger, both felt thirst. But only for each other. 

”When do you leave?” Zhan breathed heavily.

”Day after...legend...of...fei….,” Yibo mumbled between kisses. “We have all day tomorrow.”

”Actually...I have two meetings tomorrow…,” Zhan pulled back for a brief second. “Vidal Sasoon and Gucci,” he smiled sheepishly.

Yibo exhaled in mild frustration but then swooped in and crashed his lips against Zhan’s.

”We’re going to fuck. in. all. your. free. time,” Yibo punched each word into Zhan’s lips, “fuck till we can't walk any more.” Yibo growled.

Zhan laughed and pulled him closer as Yibo trailed kisses down his neck.

”Fuck,” Zhan threw his head back giving Yibo more access, “...and I didn't even need to give you your surprise...”

Yibo stopped and sat up straight.

”Surprise?”

Zhan grinned and pulled out his phone and after a few swipes and taps turned it to show Yibo. 

”Swipe,” Zhan raised his eyebrows, gesturing to the phone.

Yibo held the phone and began swiping. There were photos of a house, rooms, windows, walls, furniture, and a balcony.

”What’s this?”

”It’s the solution to our problem.”

”It’s a house…,” Yibo raised an eyebrow.

”Uhuh,” Zhan nodded.

”Who’s house is this?”

”Ours.”

”What?” 

”If you like it...it’s ours…,” Zhan took the phone back and put it aside.

”....”

”So...do you?”

”....”

”Didi?”

”What do you mean it’s our house? We already have an apartment. And how is this the solution to our…”

”I’ll keep that apartment, you keep this...for appearances. And we get this new house...together...as our place...both of ours...it’s farther away from here but it’s more private...with better security...it’s a very exclusive neighborhood with other people who value their privacy as well…people….like us…and other celebrities as well… ”

"...."

”Okay,” Zhan shifted uncomfortably with Yibo still on his lap, now feeling caged in. “Look...I know I should have asked you first...I don't know why I thought this would be like romantic or something...surprising you…,” he adjusted his collar nervously, “but I just thought this could be our new home...not just my apartment that you move into…and I know this is more expensive but it’s… this place is meant for people who need a more secure and private residence…,” he glanced at a poker faced Yibo and continued to ramble, “... and I know I can't promise you that we won't have to stay at our own apartments occasionally but this is the best I could do and…”

Before Zhan could finish his bumbling, a pair of lips crashed into his and two hands grabbed his hair as Yibo’s warm body pressed into him. For a moment, Zhan froze, not expecting the intense reaction but on feeling Yibo’s tongue begging his lips, he gasped and let him in. 

Zhan moaned as Yibo devoured him for several seconds before finally releasing him from his clutches. 

”You talk too much.” Yibo breathed against Zhan’s lips before pulling back by only a few inches, breath still heavy. 

”Didi...I…”

”Yes.”

”Huh?”

”Yes, I like it.”

”You do?” Zhan sat up and straightened Yibo along with him. “Are you sure? If you want, you can go see it first…”

”Wherever you are, that’s where home is for me.”

Zhan paused and gazed into Yibo’s eyes. They were filled with sincerity, determination and a fiery passion. He could sense the tears that lingered just at their edge and felt his own eyes welling up.

”I’m sorry I was so immature about this before...," Yibo looked down and played with Zhan's tie, "but in the future, even if we do have to spend a few days at our old places for appearances, I’ll do it...I promise. As long as we have a home together and build a life there together...I’ll do anything to protect it.”

”Didi…,” Zhan pulled Yibo into a hug and cupped the back of his head with one hand. “I’m sorry I made you do this…”

”You have nothing to be sorry about, ge...this is the reality we live in...you were just doing what you thought was right...and I see it now.” Yibo buried his face in Zhan’s neck and let the tears slip out.

”I love you,” Zhan whispered and let his tears slip out as well.


	161. I'm going to enjoy this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: references to sexual harrassment/non con/dub con in roleplay and possibly a little more. If it makes you squeamish or you don't agree with it, please skip this and the next chapter.

* * *

”How did you even find out about this?” Yibo wiped his cheeks as he sat up finally.

”I got a call from Han-ge...he said you had been dull for several days and wanted to know if everything was alright,” Zhan narrowed his eyes at Yibo. “And I was already feeling so bad...that just made me feel worse...anyway...I told him everything and he told me about this neighborhood...but more importantly, why didn't you tell me you were feeling low this whole time?”

”Oh,” Yibo grinned sheepishly. “Yeah...I was just...homesick…it was silly.”

”It doesn’t matter...if it’s making you low, I want to know.”

”Hmm...I just...miss your apartm...our apartment.”

”I know, didi…,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s nose. “That’s why I just couldn't wait and got in touch with the agent whose contact Han-ge gave me. He said he trusts them and they are very discreet. I liked this place but I have other options if you want to… ”

”It’s perfect,” Yibo smiled and interrupted Zhan.

”Okay,” Zhan let out a long exhale and smiled. “Good…”

”I love you, Zhan-ge,” Yibo ran his fingers through Zhan’s hair.

Zhan sighed with pleasure as Yibo massaged his head.

”I love you too…,” Zhan murmured.

”I love you more,” Yibo grinned and kissed Zhan’s nose. 

”Not possible,” Zhan grinned back.

They stared at each other lovingly for a few seconds before Zhan’s eyes dropped to Yibo’s lips. He leaned in and bit Yibo’s lower lip. Yibo gulped and closed his eyes as Zhan licked the spot and then proceeded to suck on the soft plushness.

”I missed this lip so much, didi…”.

”Mmm,” Yibo sighed.

”I missed this one too,” Zhan ran his tongue over the upper lip and then sucked on it as well.

Yibo opened his eyes and kissed the mole below Zhan’s lips. 

”I missed this mole...do you know how crazy it drives me, ge...always has…”

”Bo-di…,” Zhan’s breath hitched as Yibo kissed the mole and sucked it a few more times.

”Whenever I saw it during the Untamed shoot,” Yibo nibbled on the skin around the mole. “All I wanted to do was lick it,” he whispered before proceeding to lick it slowly.

”Ahh,” Zhan groaned as Yibo bit the beauty spot and held it between his teeth hungrily.

”And now I get to do whatever I want with it...all mine,” Yibo said with a low growl.

”My turn,” Zhan grabbed Yibo by the hair and pulled his head back.

”Mmm,” Yibo gulped.

”I missed your cheeks, didi,” Zhan ran a finger down Yibo’s soft cheek before biting down on it. ”I missed this ear,” Zhan pulled away, gliding his cheeks along Yibo’s and then rolled his tongue along the edge of Yibo’s right ear. “And this soft smooth neck,” he slid his lips down the side of Yibo’s neck, sprinkling kisses as he went.

Zhan smirked against the supple skin as he felt Yibo involuntarily roll his hips against Zhan, seeking friction as his erection grew.

”Fuck I missed this so much,” Zhan spoke in a low voice as he sucked on the bulge on Yibo’s throat. 

Yibo moaned in pleasure as Zhan bared his teeth against the skin, grazing it lightly, before kissing it again and again. Zhan’s lips made their way around his neck to the other side, eventually travelling up to his other ear, as his hands slipped beneath Yibo’s t-shirt. Zhan flattened his palm on Yibo’s chest and caressed his nipples. On hearing Yibo’s moans grow louder, he pulled Yibo’s shirt off and ran his tongue over the pink nubs. 

”Ge…,” Yibo let out a long pleased sigh.

”You’re so tasty,” Zhan whispered as he kissed his way around Yibo’s chest. “I missed doing this,” Zhan bit down on Yibo’s collarbone and sucked on the flesh where his neck met the shoulder.

”I missed this too,” Yibo breathed heavily. “So much,” He knead into Zhan’s lap, eliciting a groan from the man.

With darkening eyes, Yibo loosened Zhan’s tie and opened the top button of his crisp white shirt. He licked his lips as he looked at Zhan - lips ravished, eyes hooded, breath heavy, toned muscles lining his neck, and a patch of his chest exposed. 

”Fuck, ge...you look so handsome right now...in that formal shirt and tie...you look like a powerful businessman,” Yibo’s voice lowered at the end of the sentence.

”Powerful, huh?” Zhan smirked, loosening his tie a little more with a cocky grin. “Guess I should take advantage of my power….on my young...innocent...personal assistant.” Zhan spoke in a sultry yet authoritative voice. “Who’ll do whatever I tell him if he wants that…promotion.”

Zhan grabbed the back of Yibo’s thigh and flipped him onto the couch. He got on top of Yibo and hovered over his lips. Yibo gasped, almost inaudibly, as Zhan began grinding on his erection. He trembled as Zhan ran one hand down his naked chest.

”Wang Yibo,” Zhan spoke in a commanding deep voice, “will you do everything I say?”

”I...I...we shouldn’t be doing this,” Yibo feigned resistance, now fully immersed in the roleplay.

Zhan shot him a displeased look and pinned both his arms over his head with one hand while his other hand clutched his cheeks tightly. 

”You _will_ do whatever I say,” Zhan growled. “Understood?”

”Please…,” Yibo replied meekly.

Zhan paused for a second, eyeing Yibo carefully. He let go of Yibo’s cheeks and then came close to his ear. 

”Do you remember the safe word, sweetie?” He whispered before pulling back.

Yibo nodded with a small smile.

Satisfied, Zhan eyed him greedily, the lust clear in his eyes. All of a sudden, he groped Yibo’s dick, causing Yibo’s body to jerk in surprise. He massaged it a little roughly before slipping his hand inside and grabbing it firmly.

”Please...don’t…this isn’t right….”

”I like it when it’s wrong,” Zhan smirked and began stroking Yibo who closed his eyes and bit his lip. “I’m going to enjoy this a lot.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo....I went ahead and did it, didn't I!??! I can just see some of y'all leaving my fic! 😅 God I'm so nervous!! Thought ten times before posting this chapter!!!! 😰😰😰😰😰
> 
> No judgement for such a kink, please! I wanted to explore the uncomfortable in my writing. If this particular roleplay made you uncomfortable, please skip the next chapter!
> 
> For the rest of you: hope you remember roleplay is Yibo's kink and weakness. Any comments and feedback will be appreciated. My regulars know I'm insecure about my smut writing abilities.
> 
> Update: I'm hyperventilating... Should I delete this?! Omfg somebody stop me!!


	162. You got the job

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so, once again, trigger warning - references to sexual harrassment/non con/dub con during roleplay.
> 
> Secondly, thank you so much for your comments. You're right, I should be more secure in my writing and also --- as the wise katkootable said --- my fic, my rules!! I feel so much better about this after all the encouragement and sweet words from all of you!! It's the only reason I was able to write this bit and post it and not delete it!

* * *

”I’m going to enjoy this a lot.”

Zhan began stroking Yibo, groping him hard. Yibo closed his eyes and turned his face away, breathing heavy and abruptly. 

”Look at me,” he ordered.

Yibo’s eyes flickered open and hesitantly, he turned his face back to Zhan. 

”You like this,” Zhan spoke in a low voice, stating more than asking. 

Yibo shook his head subtly and looked away once more.

”I said,” Zhan gave Yibo’s dick a squeeze, “look at me!”

”Ahh!” Yibo groaned and looked at Zhan again.

”Good boy,” Zhan eased his grip.

For a brief moment, Zhan pulled back and stood up. Yibo’s eyes held a shade of disappointment but before he could protest, Zhan bent forward and yanked Yibo’s pants off. His eyes roamed Yibo’s naked body hungrily as he stood back to admire him.

 _God, I missed him so much._ Zhan thought fondly. _He really does give me all he’s got. No matter what it is. I’m going to give him what he wants as well. Anything and everything. Whatever it may be. Even this._

__

”Stand up,” Zhan loosened his tie until the knot had come apart, leaving it hanging around his neck.

__

Yibo stood up slowly, hands covering his erection.

__

”So you do like this,” Zhan smirked. “You little slut.”

__

Yibo’s breath hitched and Zhan noticed his erection grow. With one hand, Zhan unbuttoned the rest of his shirt until his torso was exposed, eyes still locked on Yibo’s erection.

__

As he removed his belt, his gaze wandered up Yibo’s naked body, up his toned abs, his smooth toned chest, his quivering plushy lips, to his darkening eyes that seemed to be on Zhan’s bare chest, roaming down to his happy trail and back to the exposed collarbone. 

__

He threw the belt aside and unzipped his trousers, lowering it just enough to finally free his own erection. With a mild gasp at the release, Zhan licked his lips as he watched Yibo’s eyes flutter around helplessly until they couldn't help but land on Zhan’s dick. He watched Yibo gulp as he stared at Zhan’s hardness and began stroking himself. 

__

”So,” Zhan began as he continued touching himself unabashedly, “do you want that promotion?”

__

Yibo’s lips parted as if to say something but then he nodded slowly instead, his eyes swerving away from Zhan’s erection every now and then before ending up on it each time. 

__

”And you’ll do anything for it?” 

__

Yibo didn't move. He didn't speak. He didn't breathe.

__

”I’ll take that,” Zhan gestured towards Yibo’s dick, “as a yes.”

__

Yibo shrivelled into himself but his eyes never left Zhan’s dick that was still being stroked.

__

”You’re my assistant, aren’t you? My _personal_ assistant…,” Zhan breathed the last words as his hand gripped his erection harder.

__

”Hmm…,” Yibo nodded.

__

”Well then…,” Zhan walked closer to Yibo and grabbed his hair with his other hand, pulling his head back. “Assist me.”

__

”How…?” Yibo glanced at Zhan through heavily lidded eyes. 

__

Zhan let Yibo go, satisfied with his words. He glided his dick on Yibo’s, mixing their precum, leaving them shiny and wet.

__

”Take my pants off.” Zhan began breathing heavier.

__

Yibo knelt in front of Zhan slowly before pulling Zhan’s pants down. Zhan stepped out of them by taking a step forward until his erection was in Yibo’s face.

__

”Take it in your mouth,” Zhan ordered.

__

Yibo shook his head. Zhan yanked his head back by the hair again and clutched his chin.

__

”Open wide...be a good assistant now…”

__

Yibo hesitated but Zhan forced two fingers into his mouth, prying them open. Before Yibo could resist any further, Zhan thrust forward and pushed his dick inside.

__

Yibo let out a meek whine and tried to move his face away but Zhan held his head firmly in place with both his hands.

__

”No one says no to me,” Zhan growled and began fucking Yibo’s mouth. 

__

Yibo moaned and whined and occasionally tried to pull back but Zhan only gripped him harder and continued to thrust inside his wet, dripping mouth. 

__

”Fuck,” Zhan moaned as he felt his body growing hot and all the blood rushing to his throbbing dick. 

__

Yibo trained his eyes up Zhan’s naked torso and found himself getting harder. His face pressed against Zhan’s groin repeatedly and he could feel the growing hardness inside his mouth. He felt the urge to gag but before he could do so, Zhan pulled away and took a step back.

__

Yibo fell forward, breaking his fall with both hands, panting for breath. Immediately, Zhan got behind him and knelt down and spread his legs further apart with his knees. He grabbed the silk tie from his neck and lifted Yibo’s body to his chest, wrapping both arms around him so he couldn't move.

__

”After I’m done...you’ll never say no to me again.”

__

He tied the silk tie around Yibo’s dick and knotted it slowly. He gave it a few tugs and tightened it some more before biting Yibo’s ears. Yibo threw his head back on Zhan’s shoulder as Zhan cupped his balls with one hand.

__

”I’m going to have my way with you, Wang Yibo…and there’s nothing you can do about it,” Zhan licked the back of Yibo’s ear. 

__

”Please...no,” Yibo mewled and thrashed about in Zhan’s arms.

__

Zhan only held him tighter with one arm around his chest, while his other hand clawed its way down Yibo’s back, wiped the overflowing precum from his dick with one finger and slid between his ass. He shoved the finger inside and Yibo’s entire body lurched, but Zhan gripped him with his strong, sinewy arms and held him in place against his chest.

__

Zhan’s lips hovered over the side of Yibo’s neck, biting and kissing and licking. He moved down to his shoulder while his finger continued probing into him mercilessly. Before long, Zhan had inserted a second finger and began scissoring Yibo open and latched onto his shoulder with his teeth.

__

”Let me go,” Yibo groaned in pain. “Please...don’t...don’t do this…”

__

”Where's the fun in that? I've got a young, beautiful, supple man at my mercy…”

__

Zhan curved both fingers inside Yibo and within moments began massaging his spot, prompting Yibo to fall back against his chest, sighing, moaning, writhing.

__

”That’s right...you’re liking this, aren’t you?”

__

”No...stop...stop,” Yibo feigned resistance.

__

Yibo’s dick was painfully erect but the silk tie was preventing him from climaxing. He whined and moaned, throwing his head back against Zhan in desperation.

__

”Let me go,” he clawed into Zhan’s arm, trying to pry himself free but was reduced to a moaning mess when Zhan hit his prostate again and again and again.

__

All of a sudden, Zhan pushed him down on all fours and in the blink of an eye, Yibo felt something thrust inside him with such force that he fell forward until his cheeks were on the ground and his arms were spread out above his head, clutching the rug.

__

”Let you go?” Zhan smirked. “I’m not done with you yet…you’re still of some use to me.”

__

Zhan held Yibo’s hips in place and began pushing into him harder and faster. Zhan slapped against Yibo’s cheek making them shudder and turn red. He grunted as he lifted Yibo’s hips higher and thrust into him harder. 

__

Yibo’s moans were muffled against the rug and he dug his nails into the soft fabric as Zhan’s hardness beat inside him mercilessly over and over and over again.

__

”I can feel you dying for release,” Zhan growled and played with the tip of Yibo’s erection with his fingers. “Beg me for release.”

__

”Let me go...please...please,” Yibo cried feebly but with every thrust, pleasure washed over him and his erection ached for freedom.

__

”Beg me...beg me for more…”

__

Yibo tried resisting but his hardness was growing and he had no release in sight. It didn't help that Zhan was ramming into his weak spot each time he pushed in, bottoming out, making Yibo feel like he was tearing apart at the seams.

__

”Fuck…,” Yibo couldn't help but moan. “Lao….laoban…”

__

”That’s right….say it again...say I’m your boss…,” Zhan’s voice was heavy and thick.

__

”Laoban,” Yibo moaned into the rug, “ple...please...let me…”

__

”Let you what? What does my little slut want? Do you still want me to let you go...”

__

”Let me...come…,” Yibo caved finally as his body filled with pleasure and desire and the need to climax.

__

Zhan smirked and with one quick tug, undid the silk tie and began stroking Yibo. Within a few seconds, both he and Yibo were sent flying off the edge as Zhan bottomed out inside him one last time.

__

Zhan pulled Yibo’s ass closer, rolling his hips, grinding into him to extend the pleasure, filling Yibo up to the brim until he was leaking out. Yibo breathed heavily, sweat dripping down his face, his dick dripping with his cum, shivering each time Zhan moved inside him. 

__

At long last, satisfied and satiated, Zhan pulled out and turned Yibo over onto his back. Yibo lay limp and spent, eventually turning onto his side into a foetal position, arms clutching his stomach, face partially buried in the rug.

__

Zhan smacked his ass one last time before standing up with a grunt. 

__

”Now get the fuck out,” Zhan pulled his pants on and began walking to the bedroom. “You got the job.”

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me you can’t imagine bad boss XZ being all zsww on seeing these looks he’s serving - 
> 
> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/ELgqHNpU4AAGmhE?format=jpg&name=medium  
> https://scontent-lax3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p640x640/75380024_601516033953989_6766330888738308096_o.jpg?_nc_cat=108&_nc_sid=110474&_nc_ohc=ZE4gDB5D4r0AX-ZnO3_&_nc_ht=scontent-lax3-1.xx&_nc_tp=6&oh=33f16564bf2c560dc7dc0050c104fe0f&oe=5EA9DC7E
> 
> https://images.businessoffashion.com/site/uploads/2020/03/idol-culture.jpg?auto=format%2Ccompress&crop=top&fit=crop&h=585&w=1023
> 
> https://i.pinimg.com/originals/90/fa/11/90fa11f1bdf6db85d781c691aee26c52.jpg
> 
> https://66.media.tumblr.com/e5f03a2ce641505997ee03aca0d6b3db/c210edca012c8b6f-79/s1280x1920/3765d42f7fb6b85e379dae4c9df606b7214ecde8.jpg
> 
> And this is Yibo in the role of the innocent cherubic personal assistant -
> 
> https://i.pinimg.com/736x/52/3e/04/523e04ee3600f0d521048c259cf69a63.jpg
> 
> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EN_u9-7VAAEXp8X?format=jpg&name=900x900
> 
> If anyone needs to cool down after this (hopefully you found it hot), here's baby XZ reading fan letters -
> 
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhan911005/status/1154660890051874818?lang=en


	163. You okay?

* * *

Zhan entered the bedroom and headed straight for the shower. He plugged the tub and turned the hot water on, adjusting it till he was satisfied with the temperature. He selected Yibo’s favorite body wash - the one that smelt like the first rain. Yibo had bought the same one that was in the hotel in which they shared a room during their Untamed shoot. 

He mixed some of it into the warm water and let it foam. He took off his clothes and dropped them into the laundry on his way out. Naked, he made his way back out to the living room where Yibo still lay, limp and spent. 

He knelt down beside the boy, placed his arms under his back and knees and turned him over. He took him in his arms, bridal style, and stood up with a huff. 

”Hey,” Zhan smiled softly and placed a kiss on Yibo’s forehead. “You okay?”

Yibo leaned in closer to Zhan and rested his head on his chest.

”Mmm…”

”Did it...feel good?” Zhan whispered as he began walking back into the bedroom.

”Mmm.” Yibo placed his hand on Zhan’s damp skin and kissed his chest.

”How’re you feeling? Does it hurt?”

”Mmm..."

Zhan could feel Yibo smile against his skin and rolled his eyes, smiling as well. 

”I hope...I didn't go too far,” Zhan whispered, barely audible, as he carried Yibo into the shower and placed Yibo in the tub.

”No,” Yibo placed a hand behind Zhan’s neck, preventing him from pulling away and drew him closer. “It was just what I wanted.”

_He gives me everything I need._ Yibo thought as Zhan leaned in and sealed their lips together. _He doesn’t question. He doesn’t judge. He just gives. No matter what it is. How did I get so lucky._

Zhan held Yibo’s cheeks gently in both hands and kissed him slowly and tenderly. Before pulling back, he placed kisses on both his cheeks and his forehead. He got into the tub, slipping in behind Yibo, and stretched his long legs forward on either side of the boy. 

Yibo leaned back and rested against Zhan’s chest with a sigh as Zhan kissed his temple and slowly massaged his shoulder where he had bitten him. He placed kisses on the bruise and along the side of Yibo’s neck, drawing more sighs from the boy.

”Where does it hurt?” Zhan whispered soothingly as he began massaging Yibo’s arms.

”Back…,” Yibo hummed.

”Come here, puppy,” Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo and snuggled him closer to his chest. 

After a few more seconds of cuddling in the aromatic water, Zhan massaged Yibo’s neck and down his chest, before reaching into the water to his hips. He massaged the sides, gently kneading into the sore muscles. 

”Lean forward, sweetie,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s ear.

Yibo leaned ahead and did as he was told. Zhan moved both hands around to the back, pressing and massaging as he went. He rubbed a little firmly into Yibo’s lower back, moving his hands slowly and carefully.

”Is the pressure okay?”

”Mmm…”

Zhan smiled and shook his head as he continued the massage.

”Get on your knees...let me massage your ass...it must hurt too?” Zhan kissed Yibo’s back.

Yibo tilted his head to the side and nodded before leaning forward and lifting himself. Zhan pressed down on Yibo’s tailbone and down the sides of his ass, kneading and caressing and massaging. 

”Does this feel good?” 

”So good,” Yibo whispered in a raspy voice.

After some more seconds, Yibo sat down once again and leaned back into Zhan’s chest.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo murmured and tilted his face to the crook of Zhan’s neck, sucking on it for a few seconds.

”Bo-di,” Zhan smiled and held him closer.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo kissed the length of Zhan’s jawline. 

”Bo-di,” Zhan whispered, angling his head down to indulge the boy.

It was when he looked down, that Zhan noticed Yibo getting hard again. He slid his right hand into the glowing water and gently took him in his hand.

”Ge…,” Yibo placed a hand on Zhan’s cheek as he rested his head back onto Zhan’s shoulder, “you don't have to…”

”I want to, didi…,” Zhan turned Yibo’s face towards him with his left hand caressing Yibo’s cheek. “I want to,” he spoke with a smile, gazing into Yibo’s eyes.

Zhan drew Yibo in for a kiss and never stopped. They drowned into the kiss as Zhan stroked him. They poured their longing and aching hearts into the kiss from a long month of separation. Yibo’s moans echoed in the bathroom as Zhan’s hand went from stroking him lovingly to giving him what he needed, faster, harder, in rhythm with his racing heart.

He kissed him through the rising pleasure, he kissed him as his body soared, he kissed him as he reached the edge, he kissed him as he floated in the cloud of the intense sensations that rushed through his body. Their tongues danced together as Yibo turned around and wrapped his legs around Zhan, never once breaking the kiss. Zhan pulled him closer until he was on his lap, never once breaking the kiss.

They held each other, closer and tighter, until there was nothing between them but love. Their lips never parted until they were gasping for air. Forehead to forehead, nose to nose, they breathed together, placing hurried kisses on their panting lips, leaving trails of wetness, not knowing where one’s breath ended and the other’s began.

”I love you…,” Zhan continued stroking Yibo feverishly.

Yibo moaned into Zhan’s mouth as his hands moved at a frantic pace and Zhan absorbed each and every sound that Yibo made.

”Ge…”

”I’m right here, sweetie...I’m right here,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s lips, nuzzled against Yibo’s cheek, nibbled on his chin.

With one final movement of his hand, Zhan had Yibo coming in his lap. He stroked him lovingly through, drawing out his pleasure, extracting more moans that subsided into heavy breaths and wet kisses.

”I love you too,” Yibo’s lips whispered against Zhan’s. “I love you...I love you,” he kissed Zhan’s mole again and again. “I love you.”

”Missed me that much, huh?” Zhan smiled and gently held the back of Yibo’s neck.

”You have no idea,” Yibo finally pulled back and sat up.

”I missed you too...more than you can imagine.”

”Really?” 

”Of course…this is the longest we’ve been apart...one whole month… ”

”It’s not the last time we’ll be apart for this long though. Is it?” Yibo looked down, dejected.

”I won't lie, didi...there will be times when we’ll be apart for longer… that’s just the nature of our jobs...right?”

Yibo nodded.

”But that doesn’t mean anything…," Zhan continued, "we’ll be fine… nothing can change that. You and me...we're good together...so so good…we can handle the distance...it’ll only make us stronger.”

”Promise?”

”Promise.” Zhan brushed aside a strand of wet hair from Yibo's forehead.

”Every time you go, it’s like my heart’s gone with you," Yibo looked at Zhan with an innocent look in his eyes.

”So corny, didi,” Zhan grinned.

”Only for you, ge. Only for you.”


	164. You made a weird sound

* * *

They lay in bed, naked, in a comfortable silence. Zhan sat against the headboard, scrolling through his emails and messages and replying to each one. Occasionally, he stroked Yibo’s hair who was resting on his lap.

”What time are your meetings tomorrow?” Yibo murmured softly, not breaking the calmness of the moment.

”Gucci at 8 am and Vidal Sasoon at 3 pm.” Zhan replied in a low voice as his attention remained focused on his emails.

”8 am? Isn't that too early?”

”I’m actually going to be speaking with the designer directly over video….and he’s in Italy so...time difference…”

”Oh...and any update on the lawsuit?”

”I don't know actually….I was so busy these last few weeks that I told Chu Yue I’ll get in touch with him when I’m back in Beijing….I should message him now...thanks for reminding me,” Zhan ruffled Yibo’s damp hair.

Yibo frowned as Chris Lee’s words rang in his ears again. 

_Some days they were stuck together as if they were conjoined twins! If I didn't know any better, I would have thought they were two lovebirds!_

Yibo scoffed as he recalled her words.

_Love birds! Hmmpff! Zhan-ge is mine and only mine. Nothing comes close to the bond we had on our set!!_

”What happened?” Zhan’s voice interrupted his internal monologue.

”Huh?”

”You made a weird sound…”

”Oh, did I? Nothing...nothing’s the matter…”

”Okay,” Zhan shrugged. “I’m going to call Chu Yue now...he said he’s still awake.”

”Oh, so you texted him?”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded as he scrolled to find Chu Yue’s number.

”And he replied immediately at this time of the night?”

”I guess he was on his phone too, didi,” Zhan glanced down at the boy who was laying on his lap, face turned away from him. 

”So…,” Yibo hesitated, “do you text each other a lot?”

”Not a lot,” Zhan replied casually, “every now and then….especially now because of this damned lawsuit.”

”Hmm,” Yibo’s muffled voice responded as he hid his face in Zhan’s lap.

”Did something happen, didi?” Zhan turned Yibo around to face him. “Why are you asking me so many questions about Chu Yue suddenly?”

”Nothing…”

”Didi…”

”I just…I met Chris Lee…”

”And?”

”And...she went on and on about you and how close you and Chu Yue are...were...are….I don't know…”

”Oh? What else did she say?” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

”She said you guys were inseparable and that she thought...she thought…”

”She thought what?”

”That you two were like lovebirds.”

”Didi!” Zhan suppressed his laughter. “Is that why you’re behaving like this? Is that why you were messaging me all that stuff on the day of your shoot with her? Because you were jealous?”

”I was not jeal…”

”You sent me so many I miss you’s and you were swearing a lot more than usual when I asked you how your day was…,” Zhan gave him a knowing look.

_Fuck. He knows me so well!_ Yibo cursed inwardly.

”I was just...that’s how people described _us_ when we were shooting together, ge!” Yibo exclaimed before hiding his face in Zhan’s stomach.

”Hey,” Zhan chuckled and tried to pry Yibo away but he only clung tighter.

”Of course I was close to my bandmates and Chu Yue _is_ one of my closest friends. He was one of the more mature ones like me. That’s why we bonded.”

”I’ve seen your videos,” Yibo blurted.

”What videos?!”

”Of you and him...and your interactions during interviews and stuff…”

”Didi...do you, of all people, really want to tug at that string? Because I can pull up your old videos…”

”Okay, okay I get it. I know how it is being in a boy band...I know how it is living with them...but I…,” Yibo sat up and scowled at Zhan.

”But what, didi?” Zhan sighed and put his glasses and phone aside on the nightstand.

”I couldn't help but think...what if we had never met? Would you be with Chu Yue? What if Chu Yue had confessed to you earlier? Would you be dating him instead?”

”Didi!” Zhan’s eyes widened and he stared at Yibo in disbelief. “How can you even….why would you think that? This was all before I met you.”

”I know, I just...he’s so mature like you...and I’m so childish...and so much younger than you...if you had never met me, would he have been a better match for you?”

”No. He wouldn't.”

Yibo looked up at Zhan, surprised at his short and quick response.

”Chu Yue and me are very similar, that’s why we make such a good work team and that’s why we are such good friends. But you and me, we’re different, we complement each other...that’s why we make such a good couple...that’s what attracted me to you...that’s what makes us stronger together. What one lacks, the other makes up for.”

”Oh.” Yibo looked down again. “I know...you’re right...I was just insecure…”

”Do you think _I_ don’t get insecure? You’re so young, still growing...still evolving into your own person...it scares me sometimes that you may outgrow me and find someone else who suits you better at a later age.” There was a quiver in Zhan’s voice.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo scooched closer in alarm. “That would never…I would never….nothing can….”

”Exactly,” Zhan managed a small trembling smile as his emotions began to overwhelm him. “It’s the same for me too, didi.”

Yibo relaxed and cuddled against Zhan’s chest. Zhan wrapped an arm around him and rested his chin on Yibo’s head.

”Don't torture yourself like this, didi,” Zhan sighed. “It’ll only make our situation harder. It’s hard enough having to hide and be away from each other for so long…”

”I know, ge...I’m sorry…”

”Plus...you have nothing to worry about...Chu Yue is seeing someone, remember? The past is the past...he is happy...I am happy...happier than I have ever been. You are not just my boyfriend….you’re also my best friend.”

”You’re my best friend too, ge.”

”Good...now let’s get some sleep...I have an early morning.”

”Mmm,” Yibo hummed as Zhan slid down to lay on the bed and adjusted himself once again in Zhan’s arms. 

”Good night, puppy,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s forehead. 

”Good night, ge,” Yibo smiled in satisfaction.


	165. But that's different

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To get situated, we're now at Sep 9, 2019.

* * *

”Didi!!!” Zhan rushed out of Yibo’s spare guest room where he conducted his web meeting with the Gucci designer. “I got it! I got it!”

”Got what? Gucci? Oh my god, ge?!! Are you serious?!?” Yibo’s eyes widened as Zhan crashed into him and hugged him tight.

”Yes, I’m going to be working with them...they want me on board! They want to dress me, they want me to wear them and their bags at every event, they want me to attend the Milan Fashion Week!!”

”That’s crazy, ge!! When is it?”

”On the 22nd of this month, right after our Thailand fanmeet!!”

”Oh, that’s awesome...but that means...you’ll be doing Jade Dynasty promotions and Oath of Love for the next ten days and then doing both Thailand and Milan in two days!?”

”I’ll figure it out,” Zhan dismissed Yibo’s concern with a wave of his hand. “This is a once in a lifetime opportunity! Milan Fashion Week. Gucci. This is the big leagues!”

”You’re on a roll, ge,” Yibo grinned and hugged the ecstatic Zhan.

”What about you? You’re going to be shooting Legend of Fei from tomorrow till the fanmeet too, right?”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded as they stayed in each other’s embrace. “I won't be able to watch Jade Dynasty as soon as it releases...but I promise you I’ll watch it as soon as I’m back from Thailand.”

”Isn't your short film for the mid-autumn festival releasing in a few days too?”

”Hmm.”

”I’ll watch it when I get the chance between Oath of Love!” Zhan kissed Yibo’s shoulder. “By the way,” Zhan pulled away and bit his lip, “I’m going to launch the studio’s Weibo account today...wanted to do it with you by my side,” he blushed.

”That’s exciting! Let’s do it!”

* * *

Zhan and Yibo sat side by side on the couch. Zhan fiddled with his phone nervously as he read and re-read the post caption his studio account handler had sent him. 

”It’s good…,” Yibo massaged Zhan’s back in an effort to reassure him. 

”Okay, here it goes.” He texted the guy a thumbs up and a few seconds later, the XZ studio account came to life on Weibo. 

Zhan commented on the post and shared a photo of his cat along with it.

_"Little Zhan, work hard."_

With a long sigh, he kept his phone aside and leaned back on the couch, massaging his chest to ease the anxiety he had been feeling.

”Are you stressed? Is your chest hurting?” Yibo asked, concerned and worried.

”I’ll be fine,” Zhan smiled. “Just a little anxious.”

”You did it...you’re taking back some control...don't think too ahead. Just take it one day at a time. You’re studio will figure itself out. That’s what you hired that team for.”

”Hmm…,” Zhan nodded and then stretched his arms out. “Come here.”

Yibo snuggled against his chest and laid his hand over Zhan’s chest, stroking it gently.

”Didi,” Zhan smirked suddenly.

”Hmm?”

”You know what would help my anxiety?”

”What?” Yibo sat up and looked at Zhan.

Zhan grabbed Yibo’s shirt and pulled him close.

”Someone promised me he would fuck me till I can’t walk,” Zhan whispered, rubbing his nose against Yibo’s.

”Is that so? Can’t break promises, now can we?” Yibo grinned and got on top as Zhan lay back on the couch with a knowing smile.

”What do you want, sweetheart?” Yibo murmured as he teased Zhan’s lips with his. 

Zhan guided Yibo’s hand under him, digging his fingers into the supple flesh on his ass. He batted his eyelashes at Yibo and bit his lower lip seductively.

”Fuck me till I can’t walk, didi.”

* * *

Later that night, as Zhan helped Yibo pack, the silence was more somber. 

”We just had one day together. It’s not fair!” Yibo pouted.

”I know, didi,” Zhan rolled up Yibo’s socks and put them in the bag alongside his other clothes.

Yibo came behind Zhan and wrapped his arms around him. He kissed his back and buried his nose in it. 

”I’ll mith yu” he spoke in a muffled voice.

”What?” Zhan looked over his shoulder to try and catch a glimpse of the boy.

”I’ll miss you!” Yibo whined.

“This time,” Zhan turned around and kissed both of Yibo’s cheeks, “it’s only ten days...we’ll see each other soon in Thailand!”

”But that’s different...it won't be like being at home together. We’ll still have to be careful and keep a certain distance.”

”Yeah,” Zhan frowned. 

”I won’t be able to do this,” Yibo pouted and kissed Zhan’s nose.

”Mmm,” Zhan smiled and ruffled Yibo’s hair.

”Or this,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s mole. 

”Yeah,” Zhan sighed.

”And definitely not this,” Yibo pushed his tongue between Zhan’s lips and probed inside greedily.

”Mmm.” Zhan hummed as Yibo explored him.

When Yibo pulled back, Zhan caressed his face with a sad smile.

“But…,” his eyes lit up suddenly. “It could be fun...sneaking around...into each other’s rooms…”

”Hmm,” Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhans’s waist, “maybe steal some kisses backstage,” he wiggled his eyebrows with a smirk.

”Didi,” Zhan shot him a warning glare.

”Maybe even onstage,” Yibo licked his lips.

”Didi…,” Zhan feigned an angry look.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo grinned mischievously.

”Didi,” Zhan smiled as Yibo’s finger traced his jawline.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo’s voice softened as he stopped his finger on Zhan’s lower lip. 

Zhan sighed and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s neck. They melted into the kiss and swayed in each other’s arms. Zhan held the back of Yibo’ head and drew him in, further in, closer. Their tongues tangled, their breaths heavy, their moans messy. 

”Not on stage,” Zhan pulled away with a grin.

Yibo laughed and brushed aside a strand of Zhan’s hair.

”Fine, not on stage.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yibo’s short film for the mid autumn festival -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xzaqmFOSpoI
> 
> Xiao Zhan launched his studio at the end of Sep (in my timeline I made him launch it earlier hehe) -  
> http://www.dramapanda.com/2019/09/xiao-zhan-gets-his-own-studio-3-years.html
> 
> Jade Dynasty press conference -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPiyPScr4yk
> 
> Xiao Zhan defending his fans when asked about how he was stuck and had to run away -  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/09/10/xiao-zhan-protects-his-sasaeng-fans/


	166. I'm screwed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being MIA for 2 days! I'm back and like I promised, I will compensate for it with multiple chapters! Hope everyone is doing well and staying safe and healthy.
> 
> To get situated in the timeline, we are now around Sep 13/14, 2019.

* * *

> _Zhan: It’s out, Bo-di! It’s officially out.  
>    
>  Zhan: My first movie as a main lead _😶 _  
>   
>  Zhan: I know you’ll probably only see this later  
>    
>  Zhan: And that your reception sucks in that remote location  
>    
>  Zhan: But I so wish you could see the movie  
>    
>  Zhan: I wish you could accompany me as my +1 at the launch party and if we have a celebration party later on _☹️ _  
>   
>  Zhan: I'll watch your short film once I'm home tonight  
>    
>  Zhan: I miss you  
>    
>  Zhan: I miss you so much _

Zhan sighed and put his phone aside. He had just finished three interviews and still had four more to go. Between them, he would either message Yibo or go over his script for Oath of Love. 

_It’s my first big modern drama. I’m so nervous. I want to do this role justice. The story and the romantic arc so intense and deep. But nothing beats the love story of Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. We managed to convey so much despite the censorship restrictions._

Zhan snapped out of his thoughts when a female reporter came in for the next round of interviews. He stood up and bowed with a smile as she took a seat, and then mentally prepared himself for the same set of questions.

Mid-way through the interview he felt his phone buzz and his mind immediately went to Yibo.

”So,” the interviewer moved onto the next question, “what kind of role do you want to play next?

 _Ooh._ Zhan’s mind chimed in. _Maybe a cop and thief, Yibo would be better as the thief. He has that nasty sexy smirk. Or maybe we could role play Lan Zhan and Wei Ying. Fuck, that would be hot. Wait, that isn't the question. Xiao Zhan! Get it together!_

”Umm...maybe a charming villain.” Zhan smiled and nodded.

”What do you do at home?”

 _I do Yibo._ Zhan’s mind chimed in once again. _Fuck. Stop it!_

”I...I do what normal people do. Chores….ordering food...just...living a normal life.”

”What would one have to do,” she continued, “to attract your attention.”

 _Be Wang Yibo._ Zhan’s mind immediately supplied. _Wang Yibo in his heels. Fuck. Wang Yibo in no clothes. Fuck. Fuck. Control yourself, Xiao Zhan. You can't get a boner here._

”If you have a fat cat or a Shiba Inu, you will get my attention.”

After a few more questions, as soon as the interview ended, Zhan began pulling out his phone when his manager whisked him away for a photoshoot for the news outlets and his social media. With a grunt, he put his phone back in and followed her.

After a flurry of activities, Zhan finally was done for the day and when he reached his car, he crawled inside. He took his phone out but as he was unlocking the screen, his manager came in beside him and began going over his schedule for the next few days until the Thailand fanmeet.

With a long sigh, Zhan nodded as she rattled off a long list of activities, filled with magazine shoots, interviews, fanservices, brand meetings, studio commitments and so on. And that was not all, in between them was all the time he got to memorize the Oath of Love script, rehearse for the Untamed fanmeet, and prepare the song for the first episode of Our Song, the shooting of which would begin soon.

By the time she was done, they had reached his apartment. He took his leave and finally took his phone out again in the privacy of the elevator. To his dismay, however, his battery had died. With a groan, he trudged out of the lift and to his home. 

He curled up at the edge of the bed as his phone charged. As he waited for it to charge just enough so he could turn it on, his eyes began drooping and before he knew it, Zhan had dozed off.

* * *

Yibo frowned at his phone. A few hours had passed since he last messaged Zhan and there was no reply. He was still at the night shoot and was bored and dull.

 _Why hasn't he replied!? This set is so boring. We used to have so much fun while shooting the Untamed. He should be done with his interviews and what nots by now. It’s 1 am!_

Yibo rested his head back on the chair, clutching his phone in the hopes that any moment now, a reply would come. 

_It's been three days of just texting and even then we've barely been online at the same time. One more week to go for Thailand. I hope it's going to be better than the last three days. We barely got to spend a day together after a month apart and now...ughhh!!!_

”He better had watched my short film tonight like he promised he would.” Yibo grumbled under his breath and then put his phone aside as he was called for his next shot.

* * *

Zhan jerked awake suddenly from the sensation that he was falling. When he looked around it turned out that he had in fact fallen to the ground. His eyes widened in shock as he realized he had dozed off and he scrambled to get his phone. 

”No!” Zhan exclaimed as he hurriedly opened his chat with Yibo. “Fuck...so many unread messages...every hour! The last one was two hours ago, he must be asleep by now!” Zhan dragged a hand down his face.

_We haven't been able to talk or video for the three days. I shouldn't have fallen asleep. Stupid!_

> _Bo-di: I miss you too, ge  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m so bored. I don't have anyone to trouble or play with here.  
>    
>  Bo-di: How was your day?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Are you done now? It’s 11...you should be done by now!  
>    
>  Bo-di: I hope you’re okay.  
>    
>  Bo-di: I haven't seen your face in three days!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Where are you, ge!?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Zhan-ge!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Gege!  
>    
>  Bo-di: XIAO ZHAN!! _

”Oh shit, full name and all capital letters. I’m screwed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Xiao Zhan at Jade Dynasty press conference -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPiyPScr4yk  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lfxt62nTd8Y  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKLsQA0vTYU
> 
> Xiao Zhan defending his fans after the running away incident -  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/09/10/xiao-zhan-protects-his-sasaeng-fans/
> 
> Yibo’s mid autumn festival short film -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xzaqmFOSpoI


	167. We have to be on our best behaviour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're now at Sep 20, 2019

* * *

When Yibo woke up, there were several unread messages from Zhan. He sat up in excitement and opened the chat.

> _Zhan-ge: Didi….I’m so sorry!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I dozed off after I got home  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: But I watched it, didi…I watched the film  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: You were amazing _😘😘😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: My boyfriend is the most talented actor ever  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Message me when you’re awake  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: And in case you’re still mad at me, I’m sending some selfies! _

Yibo scrolled with a growing grin on his face as he looked at each photo, cuter than the previous. Zhan with a smile, poking his cheek with one finger. Zhan with a pout. Zhan showing his bunny teeth while making his eyes big and innocent. Zhan blowing him a kiss. Zhan shining his radiant smile with the caption _’I loved the film, didi...it was really good and you were fantastic!’._

> _Yibo: Good morning, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: How can I be mad when you're sending me these cute fucking photos! _

Almost immediately his phone screen lit up with an incoming video call.

_He sent me those messages at 4 in the morning. It’s 5 now, how did he get up so early!? Does he have work this early all week? He’s running from one place to another, squeezing in everything he can before the Thailand fan meet and Milan trip!_

”Bo-di!” Zhan exclaimed as soon as Yibo answered the call. “Good morning! I’m sorry. I’m so sorry!”

”It’s okay, ge,” Yibo gave him a small smile. “I understand. How are you up so early?”

”I...I didn't sleep after I woke up at 4...I didn't want to miss your message again and I wanted to see your face even if for a few minutes. I’ll be crazy busy from 9…”

Yibo’s heart softened as Zhan rambled on about his day’s schedule.

”You waited up just so you could...video?” He spoke when Zhan was finally done.

”Of course,” Zhan smiled, tired but happy. “I miss you.”

”I love you…” Yibo’s smile widened. “Wait...did you say you’re meeting your lawyers today too?”

”Yeah...remember Wajijiwa is giving me issues with the Olay deal? I’ll be negotiating with them on that…”

”Oh, the song rights and the contract with Olay right?” 

”Yeah...but enough about me...how are you...sounds like the shoot is very action intensive...you’re being careful, right?”

”Yeah, don't worry...but I have to go now, ge...I’ll be safe...and you need rest...you look so tired.”

”Hmm,” Zhan bit his lower lip with a slight smirk. “Have a few minutes, didi?”

On seeing Zhan smirk, Yibo immediately knew where Zhan was headed with the question.

”Clothes off, Zhan-ge...I have literally like 5 minutes.”

Zhan grinned and yanked his clothes off.

”I wanna see, didi...I miss your big, thick dick.”

Yibo gulped and his eyes darkened as Zhan wrapped his fingers around his long already erect dick and waited. He grabbed his dick and licked his lips. With eyes locked on each other, they began stroking themselves. With every passing minute, Zhan’s breathing grew heavier and his eyes became lidded. Yibo began stroking himself faster watching Zhan devolve into a sensual, erotic mess as his moans grew louder.

”Bo-di...I miss you...I miss you so much...I need you here, didi...I need you to fuck me,” Zhan moaned.

Yibo’s eyes widened and his erection throbbed harder at Zhan’s words. The mere thought of him being inside Zhan right now, drew him closer to the edge. As the seconds passed, they didn't tear their eyes off one another. Their eyes roamed every inch of each other's bodies, the lust evident. Yibo moaned under his breath as his pleasure rose.

”Ge...I’m gonna…”

”Almost there, didi,” Zhan’s entire body shook with pleasure as he stroked himself harder and faster. “I’m almost there…”

”I want it too, ge,” Yibo groaned as he reached his peak. “I wanna fuck you so bad!”

Zhan’s body jerked ahead as he came hard and fast. Seeing his naked, shiny, sweaty skin become messy with his cum brought Yibo to his climax as well. He shivered as he finally let go and came all over his stomach.

”I think that’s the fastest we’ve ever done this,” Zhan chuckled as he cleaned himself up. 

”Work beckons,” Yibo pursed his lips. “Can’t wait to see you in person and give you what you wanted,” he grinned and winked.

”Can't wait,” Zhan winked back even as he couldn't hold back the red blushing his cheeks.

”One more week...one whole week,” Yibo frowned.

”I love you,” Zhan threw Yibo a flying kiss.

Yibo pretended to catch it and placed it on his cheek with a smile. Zhan’s heart melted as he finally saw the smile he had been waiting to see for three days.

”I love you too, Zhan-ge.”

* * *

One week passed by like a whirlwind for Zhan. While Yibo was busy shooting for Legend of Fei, Zhan had lost track of where he was when. Before every meeting and event, his manager had to remind him of what he was supposed to do and be there. After every meeting, he was whisked away to the next event and so on until it was almost midnight and he was crawling into bed. 

Their schedules didn't allow for another video call. They never managed to catch each other online at the same time and the frustration began to get to both of them. As the longing grew in their hearts, the days and nights blended together for Zhan.

Yibo sat in between shots, bored, aloof and restless. He practiced on his skateboard but most of the time the location terrain didn't allow for it. He practiced his songs for the performance in Thailand and each time he did so, he couldn't help but reminisce over the summer that had passed and the feelings the songs evoked helped him get through the day.

Zhan spent all his free time in between his commitments memorizing lines, songs, and reviewing his studio’s work and progress along with messaging Yibo instead of resting in the break time. All he wanted to do, instead, was be at home with Yibo in his arms and sleep. His lack of sleep was beginning to creep up on him but with some energy drinks and vitality supplements, he kept himself going. 

* * *

> _Yibo: I can’t wait to see you, Zhan-ge! I’ll be arriving around 8 am tomorrow morning!  
>   
>  Yibo: Try and get some sleep in your flight  
>   
>  Yibo: I know you're going straight from your meeting to the airport  
>   
>  Yibo: You're landing at 5 am right?  
>   
>  Yibo: Good night, ge...I love you _😘 

Two hours later, when Yibo was already asleep, Zhan finally wrapped up his last meeting, which was with his lawyers and the Olay reps, and made his way to the airport. 

> _Zhan: Finally done...headed to the airport now...will reach there around 5 am, yeah.  
>    
>  Zhan: Oh, and also...Bazaar is going to do the behind the scenes for the rehearsals  
>    
>  Zhan: So we have to be on our best behaviour!  
>    
>  Zhan: And that means, you have to be on your best behaviour, sweetie 😘_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Olay issue -  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhvns/status/1232332187569016833


	168. Let's run away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> soooooo, few things - 
> 
> 1\. We're finally at the Thailand fanmeet. So excited to write these chapters! Which also means we are at Sep 20, 2019 in our timeline.
> 
> 2\. I made a few changes to the end of the previous chapter...nothing big, just modified the time they arrive in bangkok in the text messages right at the end.
> 
> 3\. I crossed 100 followers on twitter!!!!!! :O 
> 
> 4\. If you are on twitter, come chat with me at jalpari_yizhan :D

* * *

Yibo rushed from his car to his hotel room. Their press conference was at 1:30 and it was still 9:30. Then they would have rehearsals all afternoon and the fanmeet in the evening. Zhan was to fly out to Milan later that same night.

_I can’t wait to see Zhan-ge! It’s been ten days and this is the only day I have with him!! I hope he didn't forget to leave his key card under the doormat, otherwise I’ll only be able to see him at lunch! There’s no fucking way I’m going to miss out on this time with him. These three fucking precious hours!_

__

Yibo fidgeted with his phone the entire elevator ride up. When he reached his room, he was pleased to see it was right opposite Zhan’s. He hurried inside and dumped his bags and did a quick change of clothes before hurrying back out again.

__

As he stood in front of Zhan’s door, he looked around cautiously to make sure no one was around and quickly bent down to find the key card under the mat. Much to his relief, Zhan had not forgotten and he grinned excitedly as he held the card in his hand.

__

After a few more checks, he swiped the card and entered the room quietly. He tiptoed in as silently as possible and sure enough, Zhan was fast asleep, curled in a foetal position.

__

_He must have slept as soon as he reached. He didn't even change his clothes or pull out a blanket from the closet._

__

Yibo opened the closet and took out the softest blanket he could find. He removed his shoes and knelt on the floor beside Zhan, who slept along the edge of the bed. He smiled affectionately and brushed aside a strand of Zhan’s hair. Slowly, he leaned in and placed a light kiss on Zhan’s forehead.

__

He stood up and walked to the end of the bed and took Zhan’s shoes off. He removed his socks and ever so slowly, took his spectacles off and placed them on the nightstand.

__

He opened the blanket, covering Zhan with it, before getting in the bed on the other side. Carefully, he slid inside the blanket as well and placed one hand gently on Zhan’s waist, snuggling closer behind him. He spooned Zhan and kissed his shoulder.

__

Just then, Zhan moved and began shifting. Yibo cursed inwardly, afraid that he had woken him up. Zhan turned around and soon was face to face with Yibo. His eyes flickered open, although still groggy and droopy, and a tired smile spread across his face.

__

”Hi,” Zhan murmured.

__

”Hey…,” Yibo whispered back and kissed his forehead again.

__

”You’re here…”

__

”I’m right here,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s nose.

__

Zhan snuggled closer, burying his face in Yibo’s chest, who wrapped his arms tightly around Zhan and pulled him closer. Zhan sighed happily, cozy in the warmth of Yibo’s body.

__

”Is your phone silent?” Zhan’s muffled voice asked.

__

”Hmm...yours?” 

__

”Hmm…”

__

”Good...I don't want anyone disturbing us for the next three hours before the craziness begins.”

__

”Hmm...I could stay like this forever…”

__

”Me too, ge.”

__

”Let’s run away, didi,” Zhan spoke after several minutes had passed, smiling against Yibo’s chest. “Let’s run away together...so we can be like this all the time.”

__

”Oh yeah? Where would we go?” Yibo smiled at the thought.

__

”Back to Greece...stay in the house next to granny’s and I’ll cook for you and you can get the groceries…”

__

”And we can go on bike rides and play at the beach,” Yibo’s lips moved against Zhan’s forehead.

__

”And I could paint...and you could skateboard…”

__

”You can open a bakery like you’ve always wanted.”

__

”Hmm,” Zhan snuggled in closer.

__

”We could get our happily ever after there,” Yibo rested his chin on Zhan’s head.

__

”I already have my happily ever after right here...as long as you’re in my life…”

__

”Always…”

__

”Always…”

__

They held each other, happy and content in the silence that settled in the room. Zhan nuzzled against Yibo’s neck, making small sounds every now and then. Yibo smiled and massaged Zhan’s back, placing light kisses anywhere his lips could reach.

__

As the minutes passed, Yibo could feel Zhan drift in and out of sleep. His body would relax and his breathing would follow a gentle rhythm but after some minutes, he would stir awake again and cuddle further into Yibo’s body. After several times of this pattern, Zhan finally cleared his throat and spoke.

__

”Did you eat breakfast?”

__

”Shh,” Yibo whispered. “Don't try and stay up...go to sleep.”

__

”But I don't want to...I only have these few hours with just you,” Zhan pouted.

__

”Fine,” Yibo chuckled. “No, haven't had breakfast yet...and I know you must not have either…,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s temple.

__

Zhan chuckled softly and kissed Yibo’s chest.

__

”Guess we’ll just have lunch directly then...the rest of the group will be here by then too.” Yibo said.

__

Zhan tilted his head up to look at Yibo.

__

”I missed you, Bo-di.”

__

”I missed you more, ge…”

__

”Not possible…,” Zhan rubbed their noses together.

__

Yibo leaned forward and enveloped Zhan’s lips with his. Zhan melted into the kiss with a deep breath and placed a hand on Yibo’s cheek. They wrapped around each other, closing any gap that still lingered between their bodies.

__

As the kiss deepened, Zhan tangled his leg in Yibo’s and Yibo opened his mouth, letting Zhan’s eager tongue in. Yibo moaned into Zhan’s mouth as he tasted every inch of him. 

__

He rolled onto Zhan and pressed their bodies together. Zhan sighed with pleasure as Yibo’s hands roamed his entire body.

__

”Fuck...I missed you so much,” Yibo breathed heavily as Zhan’s fingers clawed into his back, spurring him on.

__

Zhan’s hands moved to Yibo’s hair and he ran his fingers through it, moaning as Yibo began devouring him passionately. Zhan rolled his hips upwards against the growing bulge in Yibo’s pant. He let out a satisfied breath as their lengths made contact and hardened more.

__

”Ge...wait...you need to sleep first…,” Yibo mumbled as Zhan’s lips made their way down his neck. 

__

”I need to eat first,” Zhan licked Yibo’s skin before sucking on it gently.

__

”Mmm...but you need rest…”

__

”I need you…”

__

”Are you sure?” Yibo pulled away just enough to look at Zhan. “I can wait...for some more time…”

__

”But I can’t,” Zhan huffed as he flipped their positions and got on top of Yibo, his lips hovering mere inches from Yibo.

__

Yibo grinned and wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist. They looked into each other’s eyes for several seconds, their smiles widening with every passing moment.

__

”I love you,” Yibo placed a peck on Zhan’s lips.

__

”Show me,” Zhan grinned and sealed their lips together.

__


	169. Chocolate?

* * *

”Show me,” Zhan grinned and sealed their lips together.

Yibo grinned as Zhan deepened the kiss and after several seconds, bit his lower lip before letting go, leaving them both breathless and aroused.

”I distinctly remember someone saying,” Yibo licked his lips, “that they wanted _me_ to fuck _them_...," Yibo’s arms snaked their way around Zhan’s waist.

”Hmm,” Zhan pretended to think before locking eyes with Yibo and smirking. “Sounds about right.”

Yibo’s eyes darkened and he tightened his grip on Zhan’s waist. Zhan shrieked as, in the blink of an eye, Yibo flipped him onto the bed and climbed on top. He pinned Zhan’s hands above his head, pressing it against the headboard.

”I’m gonna have you limping on stage,” Yibo growled and crashed his lips against Zhan.

”Ahh,” Zhan groaned as Yibo bit his way down Zhan’s neck. “No marks, Yibo!”

With a grunt, Yibo let go of Zhan’s skin and slipped one hand under his shirt. Zhan flinched at the contact but Yibo pinned him harder and groped his waist. 

”Fuck, Zhan-ge,” Yibo growled again as his hand made its way up Zhan’s chest and played with his nipple. “I’ve waited so long for this…”

”Me too,” Zhan gulped as Yibo fixed an intense stare on him. “I want you, didi...give me everything you’ve got…”

Yibo sat up and yanked Zhan’s shirt off. He bent forward and licked the nipple, lapping at it, tugging at it with his teeth until it was pert and wet. He lavished the same attention on the other nipple before sucking on the flesh of Zhan’s chest.

”Ah...didi,” Zhan moaned, clutching the Yibo’s head, pulling him closer to his heaving chest.

Zhan’s hands made their way down Yibo’s back and he pulled at the hem of his shirt. He slid it up as Yibo bruised his skin mercilessly, pausing only to let Zhan take his shirt off over his head. 

Zhan clawed at his back as Yibo kissed and licked and bit his way down Zhan’s body, his hands pulling Zhan’s pants lower as he went. With one swift motion, Yibo got Zhan’s pants and underwear off, leaving him naked and wanting more.

Yibo admired Zhan’s naked form as Zhan looked at him with heavily lidded eyes. 

”You’re beautiful...fuck…,” Yibo muttered under his breath, “and all mine…”

Zhan blushed as Yibo’s eyes roamed every inch of his body before he lay on top of Zhan. 

”I am going to ravish you, Zhan-ge,” he bit the air between their lips before kissing him senseless.

Zhan breathed heavily when Yibo pulled back and sucked his way down his body again, his hands slipping underneath him and groping his ass. Zhan threw his head back as Yibo took him in his mouth and bottomed out. 

”Fuck...didi,” Zhan exclaimed in a low voice. 

Yibo hummed and moaned as he lapped his tongue along the bottom of Zhan’s erection, taking him in deeper each time.

”Ah...feels so good...fuck...don't stop, didi,” Zhan’s moans grew more desperate, filled with want and desire.

Yibo’s hands propped Zhan’s knees up and spread his legs wider, never once pausing his mouth. Without wasting any time, Zhan stretched out and grabbed the lube which he had kept in the drawer and tossed it to Yibo. 

Yibo sat up with a smirk and took a generous amount of lube on his fingers before wrapping his mouth around Zhan again. Zhan pulled his knees back, giving Yibo better access. Yibo went in deep as one finger suddenly entered Zhan simultaneously.

”Fuckkk….fuck...yes…,” Zhan moaned. “I’ve waited so long..ahhh...didi…,” Zhan turned his head one side into the pillow in an attempt to muffle his sounds. 

Yibo’s finger prodded Zhan and began stretching him out. He sucked on the tip of Zhan’s erection as his finger went in deeper. Zhan was going crazy with the pleasure both sensations gave him when suddenly there was a knock on the door.

”Xiao Zhan,” a familiar voice called out gently. 

”Fuck...it’s Hai Kuan,” Zhan jerked up. “Yibo...stop!”

Yibo pulled back to catch his breath for a second before shaking his head.

”No fucking way,” he announced before diving back in, this time with two fingers.

”Ahh...didi!

”Xiao Zhan...you’re awake? I tried calling but you didn't pick up…,” Hai Kuan continued.

”Umm,” Zhan shut his eyes as Yibo’s fingers scissored him open and fell back on the bed. “Uhh...yeah...what...ah...what is it?” Zhan tried keeping his voice steady.

Yibo smirked and began pumping Zhan’s dick with his free hand. Zhan glared at him but clutched the pillow, his body overwhelmed with the waves of pleasure that washed over him.

”We need to place the order for Zhoucheng’s cake...the surprise, remember? Can I come in? I don't want him to hear us.” Hai Kuan replied in a low voice.

Yibo began pumping his fist harder as Zhan’s erection throbbed in his hand. At the same time, he entered a third finger inside Zhan causing Zhan to clamp his mouth shut to prevent him from screaming out loud.

”I...I...fuck,” Zhan mumbled.

”I can't hear you,” Hai Kuan raised his voice.

”I can't come to the door right now, I’m changing!” Zhan blurted quickly.

”Oh okay...I just wanted to know what flavour you had in mind...what does he like? You know him better than me.”

”Fuck...didi….fuck...stop,” Zhan begged as sweat dripped down his face.

”Do you really want me to stop sweetheart?” Yibo whispered as his hands worked faster and ruthlessly.

Zhan bit his lips and groaned into his hand, not able to say yes to the question. Yibo smirked and bent down and took Zhan in his mouth, bringing him to the edge as his fingers managed to hit his spot.

”I’m not...I...not sure…,” Zhan tried to speak as calmly as possible despite his heavy breathing.

”Hmm...vanilla?”

”No…,” Zhan bit his lips harder as Yibo deep throated him.

”Red velvet?”

”Fuck...no!” Zhan nearly exclaimed as Yibo’s fingers attacked his prostate over and over and over again.

”Wow...okay...strong reaction but alright...how about…,” Hai Kuan paused as he thought of other options.

Zhan dug his fingers into the bed as he felt himself reach his climax. With one final push, Yibo’s finger flung him over the edge.

”Chocolate?”

”Yes! Fuck...yes! Yes!!” Zhan’s body lurched up as he came hard and fast into Yibo’s mouth.

”Okay...wow...he must really love that flavour."

”Yes!” Zhan exclaimed one last time before falling back onto the pillow, spent and satiated.

”Got it...will order that.” Hai Kuan replied before leaving.

Yibo sat up on his knees and licked the corners of his mouth with a big smirk plastered on his face. 

”You fucking brat,” Zhan grit his teeth as he caught his breath.

”How was it?” Yibo’s smirk widened as he crawled up Zhan’s body, arms on either side of Zhan’s head.

Zhan took a long deep breath and shut his eyes.

”It was good,” he muttered. “So fucking good...I lost my mind.”

”Good…,” Yibo pulled Zhan’s knees back once more and let two fingers in easily, curling them inwards. “Now, my turn.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FYI - They really did celebrate Zhoucheng's birthday during the fanmeet on stage. I'll share all these links soon!


	170. For fuck's sake

”Good…now, my turn.”

Yibo pulled Zhan’s knees back once more and let two fingers in easily, curling them inwards. Zhan reached for Yibo’s face and pulled him closer to envelop his lips. 

”I’m ready, didi,” Zhan whispered and sucked on Yibo’s lower lip one last time before letting go.

Yibo bit his lip, his hands massaging Zhan’s thigh. Zhan extended his leg and stretched it out, placing it over Yibo’s shoulder. He raised an eyebrow and ran one hand down Yibo’s chest before pinching it.

”I’m waiting, didi…”

Yibo’s eyes darkened as Zhan looked at him as if throwing him a challenge. Before Zhan knew what was happening, Yibo threw Zhan’s other leg over his other shoulder as well and sat upright, raising Zhan’s legs higher until his ass was lifted off the bed. 

With one swift motion, Yibo brought his hand down and smacked Zhan’s ass. The shrill sound rippled through the room along with Zhan’s moan. 

”You like that, huh?” Yibo smirked and slapped the other side. 

”Ah...didi…,” Zhan’s voice quivered, “...we have to keep it low...this isn't our home…”

Before Zhan could finish his sentence, Yibo grabbed both his legs and flipped him onto his stomach. Zhan yelped as he was pulled back up onto all fours.

Yibo reached for the lube and spread an ample amount on his erection. Zhan looked over his shoulder in anticipation and whined softly, pushing his ass back into Yibo impatiently.

Yibo grabbed Zhan’s hips and spread his ass apart. He bent down and kissed the skin where Zhan’s ass met his thigh, causing Zhan to shudder and drop his head in pleasure. He bit his ass cheeks hungrily and then nuzzled near Zhan’s opening before licking it with his tongue.

”Bo-di,” Zhan moaned as electricity shot down his spine. “Bo-di…” 

Yibo smirked and licked him again before inserting his tongue into the opening. He fucked Zhan with his tongue for a few seconds until he had Zhan begging for more.

”Didi…,” Zhan whined, “please...fuck me...now!”

Yibo sat up on his knees again and lined himself up behind Zhan. He teased Zhan, pushing in just the slightest bit before pulling out again. When Zhan whined and looked over his shoulder with big eyes and a desperate pout, Yibo’s heart fluttered.

”I need you inside me, didi…I need that big thick dick in me. Now.”

”Fuck.” Yibo gulped.

He was about to enter him when there was another knock on the door.

”Zhan-ge!” Yubin’s cheery voice called out. 

”Oh for fuck’s sake!” Zhan groaned.

Zhan looked at Yibo who grinned at him smugly, lining himself with Zhan’s opening and pressing forward. Zhan’s eyes widened and before Yibo could follow through with what Zhan knew he intended on doing, Zhan escaped from his grip and turned around, falling on his back.

”What is it, Yubin!!?” Zhan grunted almost impatiently.

Yibo fell forward on top of Zhan and caged him in.

”Don't you dare, Yibo!” Zhan whispered and turned his face away as Yibo swooped down to kiss him. 

”Zhan-ge! Come on out! We’re all going for brunch!”

Yibo spread Zhan’s legs wide and bent his knees to his chest. He lined himself up but just as he was about to enter, Zhan placed his hand on his chest and pushed him away.

”Wang Yibo! Are you even human? Wait!” Zhan whispered.

”Umm...not now, we...I’m not hungry!” Zhan managed to respond while holding Yibo off.

”Open up!” Yubin knocked on the door again.

”You heard what he said, gege,” Yibo wiggled his eyebrows. “Open wide.”

Yibo forced Zhan’s legs apart with a low growl. Zhan tried fending him off but Yibo pinned his arms down and lined himself up again.

”You may not be hungry, ge...but I am!” He crashed his lips against Zhan.

”Zhan-ge! We’ve heard amazing things about the brunch in this hotel. And Hai Kuan said you’ve been sleeping all morning. Come on, ge! Let’s go eat." 

As Zhan tussled with Yibo, Yubin kept talking to try and convince Zhan.

”Fuck, does he ever keep quiet!?” Yibo grunted as he pulled away and looked at the door angrily. “I’m gonna tell him to…”

Zhan slapped a hand onto Yibo’s mouth.

”Wang Yibo...you may be shameless but I don't have such thick skin. I won't be able to show my face to them if they know what we’re…”

”We need to actually be fucking first,” Yibo smirked and without warning, caught Zhan off guard and began entering him.

”Zhan-ge,” another more soft voice called out.

”Aah,” Zhan moaned as Yibo’s hardness began filling him. “No...Yibo...I can’t...that’s Zhou...ahhh.”

With a huff, Zhan pushed Yibo aside, surprising him.

”Zhan-ge, aren’t you hungry?” Zhoucheng asked and knocked gently. 

”I...not really, A-Cheng...why don't you guys head there….we...I’ll join you later.”

”Where’s Yibo?” Yubin’s voice called. “Has he arrived in Bangkok yet?”

Zhan turned around and caught Yibo just in time, wrestling on top of him and shutting his mouth with his hands. He sat on top, knees on either side of Yibo. 

”I’m not sure...if he is he must be in his room!” Zhan croaked.

Yibo began giggling underneath him and licked his palms sloppily. Zhan pulled back at the icky sensation and glared at Yibo.

”Hi Zhan-ge!” Cao Yuchen’s voice also joined the rest of theirs. “Why are we all standing outside?

Zhan rolled his eyes and began climbing off the bed but Yibo grabbed him by the waist and pulled him down once more.

”We are not leaving this room without fucking,” Yibo bared his teeth and ordered.

”Didi...everyone...literally everyone is outside…”

”No, Hai Kuan isn't…” Yibo grinned.

”Oh wow, looks like everyone is here but Yibo,” Hai Kuan’s voice chimed in as if in response to Yibo’s challenge. “Xiao Zhan...let’s go eat…”

Zhan and Yibo looked at the door and then at each other and then at the door again, exasperation and frustration written all over their face. 

”Come on!” Cao Yuchen knocked again. “Don’t be lazy, Zhan-ge!”

”Join us!” Zhoucheng added.

”It’s not like you have anything better to do!” Yubin’s voice cackled.

”Yes, yes you do,” Yibo gripped Zhan harder and pulled him closer, rolling his hips to grind against him.

Zhan moaned and sealed his lips with Yibo’s for a few seconds, allowing himself a few more moments of weakness before wriggling out of his arms. 

“We need to…”

”But we won’t get to…”

”Later, didi…”

”I’m gonna kill them…”

”Not if I kill them first,” Zhan grinned as he pulled his pants up and wore his shirt.

”So you’re really gonna leave me like this,” Yibo gestured to his erection and sat up.

Zhan bent down and placed kisses along Yibo’s length before planting more kisses all over Yibo’s face.

”The faster we go down and eat, the faster we can…,” Zhan patted his hair down but before he could finish his sentence, Yibo jumped out of bed and yanked his pants on.

”Sounds like a plan...let’s go fast…”

”Woah...hold on their cowboy,” Zhan placed a hand on his chest. “I’m going first...you have to join us down there a few minutes later, okay? And don't you dare touch yourself while I’m gone. Understood?” Zhan batted his eyelashes.

”Fine,” Yibo grunted.

Just as Zhan turned around to leave, Yibo grabbed him by the waist and spun him around. He enveloped Zhan’s lips and kissed him passionately. It lasted merely three seconds, but left Zhan dazed and breathless.

”Are you coming, ge?” Zhoucheng asked.

”Yeah!” Zhan replied, still dazed.

Yibo turned Zhan around and nudged him towards the door with a slap on his ass.

”I better be the one coming after brunch.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was wondering...a musing if you will...if I posted an original story (on a blog or somewhere, suggestions welcome)...one chapter at a time like we do on ao3...would any one y'all be interested in reading it? Not related to yizhan or any fandom. My own fantasy world that I have been working on for a while. Just curious.


	171. I'm still prepped

* * *

”There you are, Yibo!” Yubin exclaimed when Yibo finally joined them a few minutes later.

Zhan couldn't help but glance down at his dick to check if Yibo had managed to calm himself down completely or not. To his relief, Yibo was either completely normal or was hiding it really well in his baggy pants.

Zhan suppressed a chuckle as Yibo nodded with a poker face and sat between him and Zhoucheng. He shook his head and automatically made space for Yibo which didn’t matter as Yibo slid closer to him anyway until they were sitting side by side, thigh to thigh, shoulder to shoulder.

Zhan placed his plate closer to Yibo and picked up another sandwich and some fruits and put them on it, gesturing to Yibo to eat. Yibo smiled and dug into the sandwich hungrily.

 _Just a few minutes ago those lips were on me._ Zhan attempted to control his drool as he watched Yibo’s lips. 

As if sensing his thoughts, Yibo glanced at him sideways and grinned, increasing the speed at which he chewed and consumed the sandwich.

”Be careful or you’ll choke!” Yubin warned Yibo.

 _A few minutes ago, I was nearly choking on Zhan-ge._ Yibo smirked inwardly. _Gotta eat fast so we can go back to the room. Fuck, I wanna fuck him so bad!!_

Zhan nudged Yibo’s leg under the table as he caught him staring at him. Zhan swallowed a yelp when Yibo’s hand slid under the table and down his leg until it paused on his inner thigh. Zhan tried shuffling away, but he was already at the corner of the seat, as Yibo began massaging his thigh. He shot Yibo a warning glare but to no avail. Yibo kept roaming his hand up and down Zhan's leg, greedily.

As brunch progressed, they looked for several openings to interrupt the conversation and excuse themselves. Zhan pursed his lips in frustration as he was unable to find a way to do so when suddenly, Yibo stood up and announced abruptly.

”I need to go use the restroom!” He exclaimed. 

The conversation halted and everyone looked at him as if he had grown two heads.

”Uhh, thanks for keeping us in the loop.” Hai Kuan spoke, unsure and confused.

Yibo nodded and walked away but not before throwing Zhan a knowing glance. Zhan curled his lips inward to suppress his grin and gave him a discreet nod back.

* * *

Yibo paced the room, looking up at the clock every few minutes.

_It’s already been twenty minutes! It's almost noon!! Where is Zhan-ge!? The press conference is at 1:30!_

After fifteen more minutes of pacing, Yibo received a text message.

> _Zhan-ge: Sorry, didi...just managed to get away  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Your room or mine?  
>    
>  Yibo: Mine. Apparently your room is a magnet for anyone and everyone!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Okay, didi _😂 _  
>   
> Zhan-ge: I’ll be there soon_ 😘 

A few minutes later, Yibo heard a soft knock on his door. He flung the door open and grabbed Zhan by the collar with both hands, pulling him inside. He closed the door and pushed Zhan against it, plastering his body on him.

”Fuck, Zhan-ge,” Yibo growled in a low voice. “Any longer and I would have exploded.”

”Didi,” Zhan sighed as the kiss turned hot and heavy, “quick...no time for this…,” he turned around and slid his pants down, looking over his shoulder. “Come on…please...I’m still prepped….just fuck me already.”

Without wasting more time, Yibo ripped their pants off and pulled Zhan’s hips back, bending him forward. He inserted two fingers into him to make sure he was stretched out properly, and sure enough Zhan was ready for him.

”Fuck, ge,” Yibo muttered as he lined up with Zhan’s opening and began pressing inside with a long drawn out groan.

Just then, they heard a knock on Yibo’s door.

”Wang Yibo,” a mature woman’s voice called out. “I’m coming inside.”

The words were followed by the sound of a card swiping and Yibo’s eyes widened as he realized it was his manager trying to come into his room. Zhan looked at him, mortified and confused, as Yibo pulled away and placed both his palms on the door, caging Zhan in, to prevent it from opening.

”Umm...wait!!!” Yibo exclaimed. “I’m….changing my clothes."

”Oh, alright,” his manager replied. “I’ll wait here...hurry up...the Bazaar people want to do some quick shots of you and Xiao Zhan before the press con.”

Both Zhan and Yibo smacked their foreheads as they realized they had forgotten about the short video that Bazaar was doing on the both of them in the fanmeet. They wanted to get footage of everything - behind the scenes, rehearsals, getting ready, shots of them in the beautiful stadium. 

”Fuck,” Yibo shut his eyes and whispered. “You’ve gotta hide, ge. There’s no way they’re going away from out there….”

”Can't you try!??!” Zhan glared at him with widening eyes.

”Okay, okay,” Yibo bit his lips. “Umm,” he raised his voice again, “Can’t we do this somewhere else? I can meet you there.”

”Wang Yibo! I have hair and make up with me right now. It’ll be quicker to do it here. Now let us in...come come...quickly…”

”Ugh,” Zhan groaned and turned around to face Yibo.

”You know what,” Yibo looked at him with a determined look, “why can't they see you here...for all they know we’re just...hanging out…”

”Yibo, look at us,” Zhan turned them towards the big mirror in the hallway. “We don’t look like we were just ‘hanging out’. Plus, I don't want them to have even a small suspicion about us otherwise our managements will be on us like vultures.”

”Yeah...okay...sorry, ge,” Yibo frowned and pursed his lips. 

”It’s fine….where do I hide?” Zhan rolled his eyes.

”Two options - closet or under the bed?”

”They might open your closet,” Zhan shook his head. 

”So then...under the bed?” Yibo asked him with a sheepish grin.

”Yep,” Zhan popped the ‘p’ and grunted. 

After he had slid under the bed, Yibo lay down as well and crawled inside just enough to reach Zhan. He placed light kisses on his face causing Zhan to smile and giggle.

”Sorry, ge...I’ll make this quick,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s nose before slipping out and standing up.

Zhan saw him walk away and the next thing he heard was the door being opened and people walking in.

 _I swear to god...it’s like the whole universe is conspiring against us._ Zhan dropped his forehead onto the floor in frustration.

”Look at you!” He heard the manager exclaim. “You look so tired and your hair is a mess. Looks like we have our work cut out. First, change into these clothes..”

Yibo went into the bathroom and changed into the outfit for the press con. He came back out and then two people surrounded him and began doing his hair and make-up. 

Zhan was playing with the carpet fibers, bored and impatient, when the door opened again and a familiar voice spoke. 

”Wang Yibo? Have you seen Xiao Zhan anywhere? I can't seem to find him and the cast said he left brunch a while back.”

It was his manager this time.

 _Fuck. I need to get ready too._ Zhan dragged a hand down his face. _How the hell am I going to get out of here!?_


	172. You can talk to me, man

* * *

After what seemed like forever but was only a matter of a few more minutes, Yibo’s make-up was done. He tapped his feet anxiously and kept glancing at his bed with every passing second. As soon as his team stopped fussing over him, he announced in too loud a voice.

”Okay, we’re done! Let’s go, let’s go!” He began leaving the room.

”Hold on, where are you running off…,” his manager began but Yibo had already taken his phone and was out the door.

Bewildered, she followed him hurriedly, trailed by the hair and make-up team.

”I don’t want to be late,” Yibo exclaimed as he literally jogged down the corridor, drawing them away from the room quickly. He texted Zhan as soon as they entered the elevator.

* * *

Zhan tapped his finger on the carpet impatiently after Yibo and his team left the room. When he heard his phone ping, he sighed in relief on seeing Yibo’s message. 

> _Bo-di: All clear_

He scrambled out from under the bed and rushed to the door. Slowly, he opened it a little and was about to poke his head out when he heard noises. He shut the door once again and curled his lips inwards, remaining painfully silent. When the noises passed the room by, he let out the breath he had been holding. 

He opened the door for a second time and peeked out. On seeing an empty corridor, he scampered across the hall to his door which was right opposite Yibo’s room and reached into his pocket for his key card. As he began swiping it he heard the distant voice of his manager speaking on her phone.

”I can't find him...I have no idea where…”

Before she could notice him, he ran down the hallway towards her.

”There you are!” Zhan exclaimed. “I’ve been looking all over the hotel for you. Don't we need to get ready for the Bazaar thing? We’ll be late! Come on, come on…,” he took her by the arm and dragged her to the room.

”You have been searching for me?” The bewildered woman muttered.

”Yes and the rest of the team. I’ve been looking for you since brunch. But couldn't find you anywhere!”

”Oh,” she mumbled. “Sorry...I’ll call the hair and make-up…”

”No need to apologize! I should have waited here maybe...ah well! Let’s do this!”

* * *

Yibo bit his lips and looked around. Zhan was nowhere in sight.

_I hope he makes it on time!_

”Hey, bro...can I talk with you?” Yubin’s voice snapped Yibo out of his thoughts.

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and followed Yubin who led him to one corner.

”Is everything okay with you and Zhan-ge?”

”What?”

”You both seem...different...very agitated around each other...and it seems like you’ve barely spent any time with each other since you got to Bangkok.”

”Why would you think that?” Yibo frowned.

”Well, for one...you weren’t there with him this morning when we went to get him for brunch. And you joined us late and left early without him. And again now...you showed up alone and he’s nowhere in sight.”

”Oh,” Yibo replied as his brain exploded into laughter.

_If only you fucking knew, Yubin. If only you had a fucking clue._

”You can talk to me, man. It’s okay. We’re all here for you. If you two are having problems, I can talk to...”

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo smiled widely as he spotted Zhan appear backstage finally.

He ignored Yubin, forgetting he was mid sentence, and walked over to Zhan who, much to his own pleasure, was dressed in a similar color palette as him - a crisp white shirt and black trousers - the only difference being Zhan had tucked his shirt in.

_Only Zhan-ge and me are matching. All the others are in suits._ Yibo thought with a smug smile. _If only I could tell the whole world how strong and steady Zhan-ge and me are going. We’re almost reaching one year of this relationship. Wow. How did I manage to snag this man and keep him to myself for almost a whole year!? Now, if only I can manage to hide him away somewhere and fuck him..._

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed after calling the boy’s name twice and receiving no response.

”Huh…?”

”What are you thinking? I called out to you so many times!”

”Oh, sorry...nothing,” Yibo smirked. “Just thinking about how good you look. Zhan-ge is so handsome!” He announced.

”Bo-di! Are we starting this again?”

Yibo grinned and shook his head at a smiling Zhan.

They had to wait backstage for some more time before the host would announce them one by one and request them to join him on stage. As they waited, the cameraman shooting for the Bazaar video circled Zhan and Yibo and took several shots.

Zhan stood behind Yibo as he would be the last one to be called on stage. He fiddled with his belt, adjusting and readjusting his shirt that was tucked in. He was lost in his own world when he suddenly heard a voice emerge from behind the camera.

”Wang Yibo! I’m a big fan,” the man behind the camera poked his head to the side and smiled. 

”Thank you,” Yibo smiled politely and bowed.

Zhan resumed brushing lint off his trousers when the man spoke again.

”You’re looking good today!” 

”Oh,” Yibo grinned awkwardly. “Thank you.”

Zhan blinked twice and trained his eyes on the cameraman who was looking at them through the camera. But something told Zhan that his gaze was fixed on Yibo and not the entire frame. Perhaps it was the way he had spoken or perhaps it was the way he was smiling as he looked into the eyepiece. 

”I saw your race,” the man continued as if they were having a conversation. “You were amazing.”

Something in his voice, irked Zhan. There was a softness, a tenderness underlying the straightforward compliment.

”Ah, thanks!” Yibo lit up.

”It was breathtaking watching you race...go, tracer 85!!”

_Is this man...flirting?!? Is he flirting here with Yibo?! With my Wang Yibo!?_

”Thank you...do you like motoracing?” Yibo’s attention was now piqued as always if someone around him shared his interests.

”Not much...but I like...I mean I enjoyed watching you race! It was thrilling.”

”Thank you,” Yibo blushed.

_He IS flirting with MY boyfriend!_ Zhan’s brain fired up.

He took a step closer to Yibo and stared at the camera sternly. 

_No one flirts with my boyfriend. Not even when they don't know he’s mine._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bazaar documentary on Yizhan prepping for Thailand fanmeet (note the moment at 1:30 which I have used in this chapter) -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVGX4fdwZjA
> 
> (Also, just admire the smile Yibo has only when he is with Xiao Zhan at 1:24!!)
> 
> (Also, can we acknowledge that Bazaar is a yizhan shipper as well along with tencent hahahahaha)


	173. Do you know whose fan he is?

Zhan stared at the camera and as if on cue, the man shifted the camera towards him. He gave a stern, unimpressed look to the cameraman and didn't flinch. Unsurprisingly, the cameraman didn't engage in any conversation with him since his attention was still focussed on Yibo, as was evident when he swiveled the camera once more in his direction.

”It’s you next,” the cameraman smiled wider when Hai Kuan and Yubin were called on stage.

”Hmm,” Yibo rubbed his hands together and nodded.

”Are _you_ nervous?” The cameraman poked his head out to the side again and asked Yibo incredulously.

”Just a little,” Yibo smiled shyly.

”Don't be, didi,” Zhan stepped closer before the cameraman could reply and patted his shoulder and massaged the crook of his neck with his fingers.

”Hmm,” Yibo smiled wide and looked at Zhan happily.

_All his attention on me, as it should be. Stupid cameraman._

Yibo gazed at Zhan but then turned away abruptly when all the events of the morning came rushing back to him, reminding him of how naked and sweaty they had been just a while ago and how they had been interrupted. He could feel his hormones raging again but breathed in relief when his name was announced next.

 _Focus, Yibo._ He reminded himself as he walked out onto the stage.

Backstage, Zhan straightened his sleeves as he waited. His eyes never once left the cameraman, eyeing him from top to bottom.

”So you’re a Yibo fan?” He finally broke the silence.

”Oh, yeah,” the cameraman seemed flustered. “Who isn’t?”

”Do you know whose fan Wang Yibo is?” He smirked as his name was announced.

"Uhh...no..."

Zhan leaned in and whispered, before giving one final stern look to the man and then heading out on stage.

”Mine.”

* * *

Zhan walked onto the stage, a little sour at his own behaviour.

 _How could you do that?! So what if he was a fan and even flirting with Yibo!? It’s not like Yibo was flirting back! And how could you say that?! What if he misconstrued it. Well...wasn't that what you wanted to convey anyway!? Stupid stupid. I guess it’s all the frustration piling on._ Zhan grunted as he made his way to stand next to Yibo.

 _Wait, did I even bow!? Fuck._ Zhan stood there awkwardly, managing a last minute bow.

 _What’s wrong with Zhan-ge?_ Yibo eyed Zhan in confusion. _He looks a little off._

As the press con went on, the host asked them a bunch of questions about the show and their experiences. The event was organized well and they were done in the allotted 45 minutes.

”Guess we have to head straight for rehearsal,” Zhan sighed as he walked beside Yibo. 

”Guess so…,” Yibo pursed his lips dejectedly. “Oh, you won't believe what Yubin said to me!”

”What?”

”He thinks we’re having issues because he barely saw us together all morning,” Yibo covered his mouth and snickered.

”Oh!” Zhan chuckled and shook his head. “Well...technically...he isn't wrong...we have been having _issues_ ,” he coughed to cover up his expression.

They resumed their usual chit chat when the camera resumed filming them. Zhan kept one eye on the cameraman but he didn't seem to give Yibo any special attention since Zhan’s subtle warning.

As they entered the stadium, Zhan and Yibo once again were lost in their own world. Even when they were listening to the instructions for the night’s performance and sound arrangement, their eyes always found their way to each other.

Yibo couldn't help but stare at Zhan as he watched the man pay rapt attention to the sound engineer and music director for the night. 

_Fuck, he looks so sexy when he’s all serious. I just want to take him right here right now. I want to ravish those pouty lips and leaves bruise marks all over that damn muscle on his neck._

Yibo gulped and looked away as he realized he was staring at Zhan for longer than was proper and that there were cameras all around.

_Just need to get through this rehearsal, Yibo. We’ll surely get at least an hour’s break before the fanmeet!_

As they ran through the song, Zhan and Yibo couldn't help but smile at each other with every line they sang. Yibo’s heart fluttered each time Zhan smiled at him, gave him a thumbs up, nodded in approval as he hit a note, and made eye contact as they synced up for Wuji. 

_God, I love him so much._ Zhan thought. _I need him right here right now. I missed him so much. I missed that lean, toned, greek god body. I missed those big hands. I missed everything about his...no...can’t do this here. Patience. Patience._

* * *

After rehearsal, Zhan and Yibo left the stadium for the hotel and soon were walking hastily towards the elevator when they were met with the cast members who were lounging around in the lobby area.

”Oh god, not them again!” Yibo groaned.

”If someone had told me that one day I would hate my Untamed cast mates, I would have laughed at them,” Zhan mumbled grumpily. “But I do. I really do.”

The group grew excited on seeing the two and gestured for them to join them. Zhan waved half heartedly and walked towards them but Yibo stayed in his spot, annoyed, and pulled out his phone to pretend to be busy while he thought of an escape plan.

”Is everything okay?” Hai Kuan asked softly as he approached Yibo, Yubin following close behind.

”Huh?” 

”With you and Xiao Zhan...Yubin mentioned that you two are having some troubles. We’re all here for you if you need to talk…”

”Oh...yeah…,” Yibo smirked inside as an idea struck him suddenly. “We...do...we need to talk about it...a lot...might take a long time…so we should probably...go….up to our room...”

”I understand...good luck,” Hai Kuan patted Yibo’s back.

”Yeah, bro,” Yubin nodded with a concerned look on his face. “If there’s anything we can do...just let us…”

”No nothing!” Yibo blurted. “Just leave us alone...I mean give us some time...alone…to talk...through this difficult time...”

Yibo maintained a poker face as both men nodded with genuine understanding and sympathy on their faces. He found Zhan standing with the group and pulled him aside hurriedly.

”Zhan-ge...your room...now.” Yibo whispered.

”What’s the point?” Zhan pouted. “Someone or the other is going to come and disturb us again. It’s like the whole universe is conspiring against us!!”

”I’ll take care of that,” Yibo smirked and walked back to the group.

”Yibo...no...what’re you gonna do…,” Zhan followed him nervously.

”Hey guys,” he addressed the group, “as you all must have noticed by now, Zhan-ge and me need to...talk things out,” he eyed Zhan with a somber almost pained expression.

”Yeah...we didn't want to say anything but...we hope you both are okay...you seemed agitated...almost distant...sometimes.” Zhoucheng blinked innocently. “Zhan-ge, is everything okay?”

Zhan winced as he began following what Yibo was doing. 

”Yeah,” Yibo continued. “I mean no...we’re not...so we’re going to head upstairs to Zhan-ge’s room. And I would appreciate it if you all give us some privacy, to sort things out…”

Zhan suppressed his grin as he followed Yibo amidst replies of _yeah, sure man_ and _of course, we understand_ and _take your time, guys_.

”Oh, we will,” Yibo muttered under his breath. “We will take our time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Untamed Thailand fan meet highlights -  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/09/21/the-untamed-thailand-fan-meeting-highlights/
> 
> Bazaar documentary on Yizhan prepping for Thailand fanmeet (note the moment at 1:30 which I have used in this chapter) -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVGX4fdwZjA  
> (Also, just admire the smile Yibo has only when he is with Xiao Zhan at 1:24!!)  
> (Also, can we acknowledge that Bazaar is a yizhan shipper as well along with tencent hahahahaha)
> 
> Rehearsal BTS (note Yibo’s stare at 0:10 which I have used in this chapter) -  
> https://yoo.qq.com/m/video.html?id=d0929aurcv4
> 
> Thailand BTS Xiao Zhan focus -  
> https://www.facebook.com/theuntamedC/videos/2145797869049551/  
> https://www.facebook.com/theuntamedC/videos/xiao-zhan-in-thailand-fanmeeting-with-vlogserious-rehearsal-behind-the-scenes-to/2145797869049551/
> 
> Thailand BTS Yibo focus -  
> https://wetv.vip/hi/play/1oolmlqgswg5kk9/w0032omhh3s
> 
> The epic stare and other gifs -  
> https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2F66.media.tumblr.com%2F58bcff287bc388011d54927797d60391%2Ftumblr_py7t7jokBK1yva2jjo3_500.gifv&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tumblr.com%2Ftagged%2Fthe-untamed-fan-meeting-in-thailand&tbnid=-PLgONL6AeLK0M&vet=12ahUKEwjvnM7W29LoAhUI3awKHSC1BdUQMygEegUIARDhAQ..i&docid=m60a54stErkZ3M&w=500&h=231&q=untamed%20thailand%20wang%20yibo%20%20xiao%20zhan%20rehearsals%20behind%20the%20scenes&ved=2ahUKEwjvnM7W29LoAhUI3awKHSC1BdUQMygEegUIARDhAQ#h=231&imgdii=j7cHUVideLapzM:&vet=12ahUKEwjvnM7W29LoAhUI3awKHSC1BdUQMygEegUIARDhAQ..i&w=500


	174. You asked for it

* * *

”Fuck.” Yibo shut the door.

”That…,” Zhan turned him around and placed his hands on the door, on either side of Yibo, “was brilliant.”

”Oh yeah?” Yibo grinned and wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist.

”Yeah…,” Zhan rubbed their noses together.

”Now no one is going to bother us,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s chin.

”Alone at last…,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s chin back.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo sighed with a satisfied smile and leaned back against the door.

”Bo-di…,” Zhan smiled back and rested his forehead against Yibo’s.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo whispered as he turned them around and gently pressed Zhan against the door.

”So, what do you wanna do?” Zhan gave Yibo an innocent look.

”I have something in mind,” Yibo winked.

”Like what?” Zhan feigned ignorance.

”Like this…,” Yibo closed the distance and enveloped Zhan’s lips in his.

”Mmm,” Zhan melted into the kiss. 

This time, they took their own sweet time. They let the kiss deepen as they basked in its warmth. Lips warming lips, tongue warming tongue, body warming body, breath warming breath. Soon, they were wrapped up in each other’s arms, tangled limb to limb.

”I love you,” Yibo breathed as he rolled harder against Zhan’s body.

”Ahh...I love you too,” Zhan shut his eyes and threw his head back at the door with a soft knock. 

”I love it when you get jealous,” Yibo smirked as he bit Zhan’s lower lip.

”Wha...you...noticed?” Zhan pulled back and looked into Yibo’s eyes. ”I know I shouldn't have reacted, especially given where we were but…”

”You know what I would do if someone flirted with you in front of me?” Yibo’s eyes darkened.

Zhan made his eyes bigger and shook his head, heart racing in anticipation. Yibo’s tone and expression weakened his knees. He felt heat spread through his body, as if Yibo’s intense gaze was scorching him.

”I would mark you…,” Yibo’s lips traced a line down Zhan’s neck, pausing at the dip, “...so everyone knows….,” he caught the skin between his teeth lightly before letting it go, “...that you’re mine.”

They held each other’s gaze for a moment, lips shiny and wet, breaths silent but heavy. The silence of the moment was laced with their desires. Zhan gulped as he saw the lust in Yibo’s eyes. He felt like a prey, a more than willing prey.

”Mark me then,” Zhan whispered. “What are you waiting for?”

Yibo felt something primal stir inside him. He clamped his fingers around Zhan’s narrow waist and dug his fingers in causing Zhan to wince and sigh, his lips parted. 

With a low growl, he pulled Zhan closer and tortured his lips with his. Zhan moaned half in pain, half in pleasure as Yibo turned his lips a bloody red. He gasped in relief when Yibo peeled his pants off and yanked the rest of their clothes off them in the matter of a few seconds.

Yibo flipped Zhan around and pressed his chest against the door. 

”Stay.” Yibo ordered.

Quickly, he grabbed the lube from the bag and returned to Zhan. He lavished his fingers with the lube and pressed his body against Zhan’s back.

”I love your ass, ge,” Yibo whispered as he inserted a finger into a still ready Zhan. “It’s so plump and fleshy,” he entered another finger and within moments, had scissored Zhan open.

”Mmm,” Zhan rested his forehead against the door, his knees nearly caving.

Yibo rolled against Zhan’s ass, grinding on it hard and fast. He pulled Zhan’s hips back away from the door and Zhan bent forward eagerly. For what felt like the umpteenth time that day, Yibo lined himself up with Zhan’s opening and then without wasting another moment, finally, finally, finally entered Zhan. 

Zhan and Yibo sighed in union as Yibo bottomed out inside Zhan. Yibo couldn't resist any longer. His motions grew fast and rough almost immediately. He felt his entire body go crazy at the sensations of Zhan all around him.

He moved at a frenzied pace, unable to hold himself back.

”Yes...fuck,” Zhan moaned as Yibo entered him deeper each time.

”Fuck...finally…,” Yibo groaned as sweat dripped from his face onto Zhan’s back. “You feel so good, ge….”

”Harder, didi,” Zhan whined as he followed Yibo’s rhythm, “fuck...this feels so good...harder…don’t hold back….”

”I’m not gonna last long if I go any faster, ge…,”Yibo grunted even as he thrust into Zhan ruthlessly. 

”I don't care...I need you, didi...I need you to fuck me raw…”

”God, I missed you so much….,” Yibo smirked and rammed into Zhan a few more times before feeling his entire body start to climax.

He grabbed hold of Zhan’s erection and stroked it in time with his thrusts. They moved together, fast and erratic, heat pulsing through their sweaty bodies. Their skin stuck together and their moans grew louder and more lewd with every thrust. Within seconds, they both came with prolonged moans. Zhan’s cum dripped down to the floor as he felt Yibo fill him up. He sighed in pleasure as Yibo moved inside him in shudders and shivers, still coming. 

When they were spent, Yibo pulled out and Zhan began sinking to the floor, unable to hold himself up any longer. Grinning, Yibo held onto him before he could hit the floor and led them to the bed.

They crashed into the softness and immediately wrapped themselves around each other.

”Finally…,” Yibo pulled Zhan closer. “I think I just exploded.”

”Yeah you did,” Zhan chuckled. “I can still feel it. Need to clean up but you fucked me good...need some time to recover…”

”You asked for it,” Yibo smirked.

”I did,” Zhan let out a long satisfied sigh. 

”Is your back okay?” Yibo adjusted himself so he could look at Zhan and reached out for his lower back, massaging it.

”Mmm,” Zhan grinned. “Worth it. How much time do I have to recover though?”

”Umm,” Yibo stretched to pick his phone and glanced at the time. “Fuck,” he sat up abruptly, “we have ten minutes!”

Zhan groaned and dragged a hand down his face. He sat up and began getting off the bed but slowed down as he winced at the sensations still rushing through his back and the highly sensitive region in his posterior.

”This is going to be one long night, isn't it?” Zhan shook his head with a chuckle and stood up.

”Sorry, ge,” Yibo’s eyes widened and he rushed to help him. “Was I too rough?”

”You were perfect,” Zhan smiled and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s neck, pulling him in for a kiss.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo sighed into the kiss. “Don’t go tonight…”

Zhan pulled back and brushed aside a strand of hair from Yibo’s eyes. 

”I wish I didn't have to,” he gave Yibo a sad smile. “But let’s make the most of the next few hours, shall we? And I’ll only be there for 24 hours.”

”Yeah but we're still...I'm still at my old apartment...will you be able to...come over? And in two days I’ll head off to the shoot for Legend of Fei,” Yibo pouted. 

”Come on, Bo-di...let’s not make this harder than it is.” Zhan looked at Yibo a little exasperated.

Yibo looked like he was about to say something but he remembered how little time they had left. He nodded and kissed Zhan once again before they dressed up.

Once they were ready, they gazed at each other, holding onto the moment, knowing they wouldn't be able to say goodbye to each other properly after the event.

Zhan squeezed Yibo’s hands and kissed both his palms. He planted kisses all over his face and held his cheeks in his hands.

”I love you, sweetie,” Zhan hummed as he placed another kiss on Yibo’s nose.

”I love you too, ge,” Yibo let out a soft sigh filled with bittersweet feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MY XIAO ZHAN FINALLY POSTED YESTERDAY - FOR ANYONE LIVING UNDER A ROCK, check it out on [ my post](https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1248451523530510344). I tracked and live tweeted his post, its meaning and the progress of his likes! Our king! He's that man!
> 
> Untamed Thailand fan meet highlights -  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/09/21/the-untamed-thailand-fan-meeting-highlights/
> 
> Bazaar documentary on Yizhan prepping for Thailand fanmeet (note the moment at 1:30 which I have used in this chapter) -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVGX4fdwZjA  
> (Also, just admire the smile Yibo has only when he is with Xiao Zhan at 1:24!!)  
> (Also, can we acknowledge that Bazaar is a yizhan shipper as well along with tencent hahahahaha)
> 
> Rehearsal BTS (note Yibo’s stare at 0:10 which I have used in this chapter) -  
> https://yoo.qq.com/m/video.html?id=d0929aurcv4
> 
> Fan meet, Yibo telling Xiao Zhan to take care of his back -  
> https://yoo.qq.com/m/video.html?id=d0929rmytoz
> 
> Thailand BTS Xiao Zhan focus -  
> https://www.facebook.com/theuntamedC/videos/2145797869049551/  
> https://www.facebook.com/theuntamedC/videos/xiao-zhan-in-thailand-fanmeeting-with-vlogserious-rehearsal-behind-the-scenes-to/2145797869049551/
> 
> Thailand BTS Yibo focus -  
> https://wetv.vip/hi/play/1oolmlqgswg5kk9/w0032omhh3s
> 
> Some pics and gifs (in the third link you’ll have to scroll a lot or just for them by name to find the pics) -  
> https://www.tumblr.com/tagged/yizhan  
> https://www.tumblr.com/search/the%20untamed%20fan%20meeting%20in%20thailand  
> https://www.pinoyexchange.com/discussion/941623/ndech2ya-markim-diyue-pb-kyj-xzwyb-reba-dlun-ymi/p129
> 
> The epic stare and other gifs -  
> https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2F66.media.tumblr.com%2F58bcff287bc388011d54927797d60391%2Ftumblr_py7t7jokBK1yva2jjo3_500.gifv&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tumblr.com%2Ftagged%2Fthe-untamed-fan-meeting-in-thailand&tbnid=-PLgONL6AeLK0M&vet=12ahUKEwjvnM7W29LoAhUI3awKHSC1BdUQMygEegUIARDhAQ..i&docid=m60a54stErkZ3M&w=500&h=231&q=untamed%20thailand%20wang%20yibo%20%20xiao%20zhan%20rehearsals%20behind%20the%20scenes&ved=2ahUKEwjvnM7W29LoAhUI3awKHSC1BdUQMygEegUIARDhAQ#h=231&imgdii=j7cHUVideLapzM:&vet=12ahUKEwjvnM7W29LoAhUI3awKHSC1BdUQMygEegUIARDhAQ..i&w=500


	175. Take care of your back

* * *

After hair and make-up, they lined up backstage, seconds away from the beginning of the fanmeet. As they made their way onto stage, they split into two groups much to Yibo’s dislike. The fanmeet would begin with a segment of fun games but Zhan and him were in separate teams. 

_He’s all the way over there!_ Yibo frowned. _At least if I was next to him, I could occasionally brush my arm against him or steal a glance at him. But from all the way over here, it’s going to be so obvious if I stare at him!!_

When the games were about to commence, the teams walked over to wish each other good luck. Yibo walked to Zhan with a smirk and Zhan was surprised when Yibo pulled him in close and whispered in his ear.

”Take care of your back, Zhan-ge,” he patted Zhan’s lower back with the table tennis paddle.

Zhan glanced up at the big screen as Yibo pulled back and sure enough the cameras were on them and from where they stood, the angle had made it seem like Yibo had kissed him on the cheek.

Zhan looked at Yibo with a surprised look and barely managed to suppress his blush.

 _Fuck, that brat!_ Zhan thought. _He knew where the camera was! He did this on purpose. At least he didn't announce the condition of my back to the whole audience!_

But Zhan had spoken too soon. In the very next moment, when the hosts asked them to say a few words of warning to the other team, Yibo, without missing a beat, had beamed ear to ear while speaking.

”Zhan-ge!” The audience roared and cheered. “Be careful with your back!”

Zhan shook his head and looked down with a smile, hoping it would mask his blush. Yibo watched, satisfied, as Zhan’s eyes crinkled into half moons.

 _He’s right._ Yibo felt a warmth spread through his chest seeing Zhan’s radiant smile. _We should just make the most of the time we have._

* * *

Yibo waited backstage, smiling to himself as Zhan wrapped up his solo song. He readied himself in the marked spot which would, in a few seconds, be propped up slowly to get him on stage. 

All of a sudden he heard the audience grow silent.

 _He must be doing his finger on lips thing to hush the crowd so he can announce our duet._ Yibo grinned and shook his head.

Just as suddenly, he heard the audience erupt into cheers, laughter, and cooes. He looked around confused until a staff member, herself giggling, explained what had happened as she received the information in her headset.

Yibo’s platform began rising but he managed to catch some of her words.

”Looks like Xiao Zhan burst into his trademark 1000 watt smile on stage. The audience went crazy! How cute!”

 _Only I can call Zhan-ge cute!_ Yibo pouted internally. _But she isn't wrong...who wouldn't go crazy over the adorable smile._

As he emerged onto stage, his eyes immediately found Zhan who looked over to his spot to check on him. Zhan gave him a thumbs up and a bright smile while adjusting his ear piece. When Yibo joined him on stage, he walked beside Zhan and whispered as discreetly as he could.

”Heard you smiled at everyone here...and drove them crazy...don’t throw your smiles around so carelessly, Zhan-ge...us mere mortals can die.” Yibo half complained half teased.

”What?” Zhan threw Yibo a side eye and a flirty smile. “I can't even smile now?”

 _Fuck._ Yibo felt his heart flutter on seeing Zhan’s coquettish look. _I think I could go for a round 2 now!_

* * *

When the final Wuji performance was over, Zhan breathed a sigh of relief.

_We got through it. Although there were several close calls with the way Yibo was staring at me, we didn't fuck up in an obvious way! And I managed to not forget a single line of the lyrics!_

Zhan hurriedly fell into step with Yibo as they walked ahead of the others to go backstage, in the hope that they could get a few minutes alone. 

”You think we can get a minute in the dressing room, ge?” Yibo whispered. 

”Umm...maybe...let’s hurry,” Zhan whispered back, hastily walking towards the room.

But as soon as they reached the door, Zhan was interrupted by his manager. 

”Good...there you are...gather your things from the dressing room...we’ve got your bags,” she gestured to the bodyguard. “We have to leave like...now.”

”Uhh,” Zhan looked around, desperately trying to come up with a way to get a moment alone with Yibo. “I...I need to use the restroom real quick. Yibo, you know where it is?”

”Uhuh,” Yibo nodded, catching on, “I’ll show you, ge.”

They walked side by side to the restroom at the farther end instead of the one close by towards the exit. Once inside, Zhan turned to Yibo quickly and held his hand tightly. He wrapped his other hand behind his neck and pulled him close. 

Just then, the door opened and they sprang apart just in time as some staff members from the event walked in chit chatting merrily. They cleared their throats and pretended to wash their hands, doing their best to mask their frustration and nervousness.

When they stepped out of the washroom, a sullen silence prevailed. They were surrounded by event staff at every corner.

”Ge...I…,” Yibo began softly.

”I know…,” Zhan replied just as softly, eyes looking around carefully before adding, “Me too.”

Yibo looked at Zhan with shining eyes. Zhan felt the back of his eyes burn on seeing the devotion on Yibo’s face.

A few seconds later they were once again surrounded by the rest of the cast and their teams. Zhan’s eyes never once left Yibo’s form as they both stood in separate circles listening to their staff briefing them on their next moves. 

_Why does this get harder each time we have to go our separate ways. Even though I know we will see each other again, even though I know that we will be together for the rest of our lives, it doesn’t make it any easier to be apart._ Zhan held back his tears.

Zhan turned his attention to his manager who had, more than once, snapped her fingers at him to get his attention. The moment he looked away, Yibo turned around to look at him, finally released by his manager.

 _Why is this so hard? I can't bear to be away from him even for a minute. And it’s been so long since we were together for more than a day at a time. Even though I am so happy for him, sometimes I miss the old days, before our show aired, when he had so much more time. It’ll get better. We’ll find a balance. I hope so._ Yibo swallowed his emotions.

”Lao Wang,” Zhan cleared his throat but Yibo could hear the quiver in his voice as he pronounced the public nickname he had for him, “I...I’m going to leave now.”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and glanced at his impatient manager. “Have a safe flight, Zhan-ge.”

Before Zhan could say anything else, he was whisked away by his manager and bodyguard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thailand full fanmeet fancam -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddWpG00rPHM
> 
> Yibo telling Xiao Zhan to take care of his back -  
> https://yoo.qq.com/m/video.html?id=d0929rmytoz
> 
> Fan videos of the fanmeet yizhan moments -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxLSutYAkfU  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r8fY-0Ximxo  
> (at 5:52 in the above video is when some fans lip read them as saying a part of the dialogs that I have written in the chapter about Xiao Zhan’s smile) 
> 
> Untamed Thailand fan meet highlights -  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/09/21/the-untamed-thailand-fan-meeting-highlights/


	176. Don't forget

> _Zhan: Just reached Milan, sweetie  
>    
>  Zhan: The weather here is so good  
>    
>  Zhan: They’re going to be shooting a 24 hours with me sort of video  
>    
>  Zhan: So might not be able to check my phone too often  
>    
>  Zhan: Miss you _

Zhan sighed and looked outside the window as the car slowly carved its way through the crowd that was waiting for him outside the airport. It was early morning and he had a long day ahead of him. 

_Yibo will be busy at TTXS today. I hope we can live in the same place again soon._

As if on cue, Zhan’s phone pinged. Thinking it was Yibo, Zhan pulled his phone out excitedly but it was his property agent instead. Zhan grew nervous. He had been waiting to hear back on the house but two weeks had passed and he had heard nothing.

But when he read the message, his eyes widened in joy and surprise.

_We got it! We got the house! I need to tell Yibo!_ But Zhan’s face dropped when he read the rest of the message. _Oh...it won't be move-in ready for another few weeks. Fuck._

Dejectedly, he opened his chat with Yibo.

> _Zhan: So...I have some good news and bad news  
>    
>  Zhan: We got the house, Bo-di! Our new home!  
>    
>  Zhan: But it won’t be ready for another few days...okay, weeks  
>    
>  Zhan: But we’re only in Beijing at the same time for the next few days and then you’re off to Legend of Fei.  
>    
>  Zhan: It should be ready by the time you’re back  
>    
>  Zhan: Please don’t be upset, okay?  
>    
>  Zhan: I love you _

* * *

Yibo sat down with a huff in his chair. It had been a long day at TTXS, shooting multiple episodes to compensate for his time away at Legend of Fei in the following week. He pulled out his phone to check on Zhan.

When he saw Zhan’s last text, however, he frowned and felt a mix of irritation and dread rise inside him. His mind automatically jumped to worst case scenario.

_What if we have to live separately for way longer? What if it's for months?! I can't do this! No, be mature, Yibo. You promised Zhan-ge you would be more understanding of the situation. Don't forget why you’re doing this, what you’re protecting. I can't make it harder on him. I don't want him to feel guilty again. It’s just temporary._

> _Yibo: That’s great news, ge!  
>    
>  Yibo: I can wait...it’s okay...it’s just a temporary thing...we’ll manage  
>    
>  Yibo: And maybe we can find a way to sneak to each other’s apartments in the next few days before I leave  
>    
>  Yibo: I love you too _

Like he had said, Zhan hadn't been able to check his phone during his 24 hours at Milan. But Yibo followed him on Weibo. He saw short videos of Zhan at the fashion week, Zhan at the airport, Zhan at a photoshoot, Zhan at an interview, Zhan at the cathedral.

He must have been so excited to see the cathedral! He looks so tired, though. It must be hectic. He flew from China to Thailand to Italy in two days. And I think he’s going to begin shooting for Oath of love and Our song as soon as he is back. That's insane! 

With a sigh, he put his phone aside and resumed shooting the next segment. By the time he was done it was almost 11 pm.

> _Yibo: I’m home now. We managed to shoot a few extra episodes before I leave.  
>    
>  Yibo: Do you think you can video when you’re back at your hotel?  
>    
>  Yibo: I can get up...it will be early in the morning for me  
>    
>  Yibo: Just call me no matter what time it is  
>    
>  Yibo: I miss you, need to see your face. I don't know why, but it’s harder this time  
>    
>  Yibo: Being away from you _

* * *

Zhan reached his hotel room at midnight. He put his phone to charge and took a quick shower.

_Wow, that was a whirlwind of a day! Maybe I should wait to call Yibo. I’ll be seeing him in a few hours anyway. No, he asked me to call no matter what. He sounded restless. I should call him. I’ll stay up a little longer so it’s a more reasonable time in the morning for him._

Zhan made himself comfortable on his bed. He began scrolling through Weibo and saw recent photos of Yibo at the GQ event, on Elle and Bazaar and getting out of a shooting studio.

_It’s so crazy around him. The fans find us everywhere._ Zhan frowned. _Sometimes I wish I could have both - my success and my privacy. Is that too much to ask for?_

Zhan continued scrolling and before he knew it, his eyes were drooping shut. His body fell to one side with his phone still in his hand. A few minutes later, his phone rang but Zhan had slipped into a deep, long overdue slumber.

It was 4 am when Zhan’s eyes flung open. He saw his phone and groaned at the three missed calls but he had no time. His flight was in two hours and he was running late. He hurriedly texted Yibo his apologies but refrained from calling him since he knew he was at a fashion shoot. It was the morning of the next day when Zhan’s flight landed in Beijing. He had slept the entire flight so that he could be fresh in the morning since he had an early morning shoot. 

_I’ll get an hour or so with him if traffic allows._ Zhan bit his lip impatiently. 

* * *

Yibo woke up, still groggy. He glanced at the time and sat up on realizing that Zhan would be home any minute. He picked up his phone but his face dropped immediately on seeing the messages Zhan had sent an hour back.

> _Zhan-ge: Bo-di...I’m stuck in traffic. I have a shoot in an hour  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Looks like I can't stop by at your apartment before it  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’ll have to head to my place straight....so I can make it on time for Oath of love _

Yibo felt his heart drop. He lay back down and sighed.

_It’s okay, Yibo. You saw Zhan-ge day at the fanmeet and you’ll see him again soon before you leave._

> _Yibo: It’s okay, ge. I understand.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Thanks, didi...I’m so sorry  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I have to go now, just reached _

* * *

When night came, Yibo got to his apartment late. There had been no message from Zhan all day. He looked him on Weibo and saw videos of him entering the Our song studio at 8 pm.

_Did he go there straight from Oath of love? If he just started shooting at 8, there’s no way he’s going to be done before midnight. Why does it...why does it feel like our relationship is moving backwards._ He felt frustrated, disappointed, even slightly annoyed.

Yibo sighed and got ready for bed. He tucked himself in and messaged Zhan.

> _Yibo: Don’t forget, ge. I leave for Legend of Fei day after for two weeks  
>    
>  Yibo: Let’s make sure we meet before then _

_I won't even be here for his birthday._ Yibo suddenly sat up. 

”I know! I can surprise him before I leave! We can celebrate his birthday early together!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some snippets from Zhan's Milan trip -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymkjhnS8Lpo  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3g5qUWWO86g&t=46s  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3ut9J-1y8k


	177. I failed

The second night wasn't any better for Zhan. Much to his and more so Yibo’s frustration, Zhan was at Oath of love from 6 am to 7 pm and then at Our song for the remainder of the night till almost 1 am. Yibo kept it together, though, distracting himself with his own work and the last minute early birthday surprise that he was trying to put together for Zhan.

He had managed to order a cake from Zhan’s favorite bakery and somehow got his driver to buy some birthday supplies to decorate Zhan’s apartment without it looking too suspicious. The next day, his last in Beijing, he rushed as soon as he was done shooting TTXS and headed straight to his car.

”I need to pick up my bags from the old apartment and...uh...drop these things off at my current apartment.”

”Isn't your new apartment undergoing some work…,” his manager asked.

It hadn't been too hard to explain away why he was staying at his old apartment but now, sneaking into Zhan’s apartment required some sly excuses.

”Yeah but I need to get something that I forgot there and just make sure everything is okay. And I need to do some other...stuff...it won't take long...just an hour or two...we have time!”

”Fine...fine!” She threw her hands up. “Sometimes I don't know what goes on in your head. It’s good, actually...I’ll go have dinner quickly too.”

Once Yibo was at Zhan’s apartment, he felt nostalgia overwhelm him. He hadn't been at his apartment in so many weeks that he had almost forgotten what it smelt like. He walked through the space slowly, taking his time to admire the warmth and homeliness of the apartment. He entered their bedroom and lay down on it, snuggling with the pillow that smelt of Zhan. He felt a pang of hurt when he remembered how they would sleep together each night, cuddling, satisfied in each other's arms.

_Soon, we’ll have a new home but this will always be our first home together even if it is just Zhan-ge’s place._ He smiled fondly. _Okay! I should hurry up, Zhan-ge should be here in half an hour._

* * *

Zhan shut his eyes for a few minutes as the crew prepared for the next shot. He was excited about how Oath of love was turning out but it was exhausting. Exhausting to shoot two shows simultaneously while keeping up with his ever growing endorsements, magazine shoots and various meetings and events.

He had had only two days of working on Our song in which he had to record his solo song, Satisfied, and go in for fittings and costume trials. But he was excited for the next shoot when he would meet the other contestants and mentors. He glanced at the time and pursed his lips.

_Yibo needs to head to the airport soon. Fuck. I should message him. There’s no way I am going to make it back on time. He’s going to be so mad._

> _Zhan: Yibo...there’s been delays into today’s shoot...looks like I won’t be able to meet you on time  
>    
>  Bo-di: Oh…  
>    
>  Zhan: I’m sorry, didi...where are you now? _

Zhan waited for several minutes but the reply didn't come. He could see Yibo typing but it seemed like he was contemplating how to reply and couldn't quite come up with an adequate response.

_He’s probably mad but still trying to be supportive and understanding._ Zhan gave a sad smile. _I’m putting him through so much. I need to make up for this when he’s back from Legend of fei._

Zhan put his phone aside after giving it one final look when he was called for the next shot, hoping Yibo would send his reply but it never came.

* * *

Yibo sat at the dining table, surrounded by the balloons that he had spent the last half an hour blowing up. His fingers fiddled with his phone as he tried to respond to Zhan’s last message.

He looked around at the cake, the streamers, the balloons, and the single rose that was kept on the table beside the handwritten note. He felt a hot tear slide down his cheek which he wiped away immediately. He tried to calm himself down and resist the urge to tear the note and pop the balloons. Instead, he just grit his teeth as the anger still washed all over him. Through sheer willpower he managed to type out a message that didn't reflect his true turmoil and placed the cake in the fridge. 

> _Yibo: I’m on my way to the airport._

Then, without looking back, he left the apartment.

* * *

Zhan trudged down the corridor to his apartment. He had replied to Yibo’s message but knew he was in the flight and wouldn't respond any time soon. He felt guilt and sadness spread through his body as he reread Yibo’s last message. It had seemed cold, distant, controlled. As if Yibo was trying his best to not be angry but also couldn't find it in himself to be understanding.

_I don't really blame him. Three days in the same city between our schedules and I still couldn't find the time to meet him._

When Zhan entered the apartment, he paused mid-step in shock. The lights were on and dimmed down and there were balloons everywhere. There were colorful streamers and even candles. Confused and still processing the sight, he put his things down and walked inside.

_Fuck, did he...is he here? Did he postpone his trip. No. No. No!_

”Bo-di!? Are you here?” Zhan called out.

When there was no response, Zhan decided Yibo was probably, true to his word, on his way to the shoot. He walked to the table and noticed a note sitting on it. It was a folded note written in Yibo’s handwriting with a scribble that said, _’Your cake is in the fridge’_.

Zhan’s heart skipped a beat. He rushed to the kitchen and let out a gasp when he saw a birthday cake in it. He brought it out and placed it on the table. He unfolded the note and realized there was more written inside.

_Dear Zhan-ge  
I’m sorry I won't be able to be with you on your birthday  
Hope this birthday surprise makes up for it  
I’m not very good at expressing myself  
But all I want to say to you is  
You are my happiness  
You are my everything  
You make me feel free  
You make me  
Your love has woken me  
You mean the world to me  
And I will do anything...everything for you  
Happy 28th birthday, ge  
I love you the most. Always.  
No matter what. Nothing can come between us._

Zhan read and reread the words, his eyes growing mistier each time. He sat on the chair, slumping onto the table. He looked at the frosty message on the cake.

_To the love of my life._

After several seconds of silence, Zhan broke down. His tears and sobs filled the air and grew heavier with each passing second. Suddenly, it seemed like everything was falling apart. His whole world seemed to be caving in on him. He had thought he was somehow managing to keep it all together - himself, his work, his relationship - but in that moment he knew something was amiss. He could feel it in his heart and he could slowly feel it in his chest. He massaged it slowly, eventually clutching it. 

_If everything was together, I would be cutting this cake with Yibo. I let him down. I failed._


	178. Now I realize

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song I have mentioned in this chapter and I highly recommend listening to it while reading the chapter if you want to get in the mood I was in while writing (it has the lyrics in English too) -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4cxK3_Yw_0
> 
> Time wise, we are now around Sep 24, 2019.

* * *

When Yibo landed and turned his phone on, he received so many notifications that even his manager looked at him in bewilderment. He widened his eyes when he saw the numerous messages and missed calls from Zhan.

> _Zhan-ge: Didi...I don't know what to say  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Sorry doesn’t seem to be enough  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I loved it...the cake...the note...the balloons...everything  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I am sorry I didn't make it on time _

Yibo’s heart melted a little at the apology.

> _Zhan-ge: I know you’re probably still in flight but I don't know why I just wanted to call you...just wanted to let you know how sorry I am...it’s stupid  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Me apologizing again and again but  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I couldn't help it, Bo-di  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: You know how it is _

Yibo felt something clench inside him.

_Again with the work!!_

Before he could continue reading Zhan's explanation, his phone lit up with a call.

”Bo-di?” Zhan spoke when Yibo finally answered on the fifth ring. “Have you reached? How was your flight?”

”You’re still up, ge?” Yibo maintained an even tone. 

”Hmm,” Zhan replied. “Just...just wanted to hear your voice.”

Yibo felt his face soften but still couldn't find it in him to reply warmly. Silence prevailed for several seconds as he waited beside his manager for his bags to arrive.

”I’m sorry, Bo-di...are you mad?” Zhan’s meek, tired voice asked.

”I’ll be fine,” Yibo muttered but then spoke more gently. “You should get some rest,” he whispered trying to avoid his manager who seemed to be eavesdropping.

”I can’t sleep...I miss you...I’m feeling so bad, didi...I really am sorry...I couldn't get them to wrap up…”

”It’s okay,” Yibo replied a little too curtly. ”I said I’ll be fine.”

”Oh…,” Zhan spoke barely audible. “I...okay...let me know when you reach your hotel.”

”Mm.”

”I…,” Zhan began but then sighed. “I love you, didi. Let’s video when you...get a chance.”

Yibo felt himself tremble as he cut the call. He felt a sudden urge to cry. He had never felt this way before. He had never not wanted to talk to Zhan. 

_What is wrong with me? Why am I feeling so….angry. I didn't even...I was so rude to Zhan-ge. And it’s not even his fault. But I just...somehow I can't become okay. I can't say it’s okay, even when he’s apologizing over and over again. I need to find a way to let this go._

* * *

Zhan stayed still for several minutes. He had never been treated this coldly by Yibo before. Even when they had fought, Yibo had been able to communicate how he felt, even if it meant needing some time alone. He had never been distant and emotionless.

He felt warm tears dampen his cheeks. He sniffled as he wiped them away and leaned against the headboard and took in a deep breath. His chest began tightening so in an attempt to distract himself, he began sifting through the song list he had been given. He had been given four songs to practice for the first episode of Our song where he would be matched with a mentor after a blind audition. But he also had to pick a few song options to present to his future mentor for their first performance together in advance.

He browsed through the long list and one song title, a song by a famous singer Na Ying who he had grown up listening to, caught his eye.

_Loving You is Loving Loneliness_

His eyes welled up once more and before he knew what he was doing, he hit play.

_In the cold late autumn,  
With the leaves passing by as they fall  
How many days have passed by like lightning  
_

Zhan’s tears slipped out again as he realized that two months had passed them by since they had spent more than a day at a time together.

_The cold drops of rain hit my warm hands  
How many tears have fallen down my cheeks endlessly  
Yet my dreams are hidden deep inside my heart  
There’s a place with a sweet fantasy of you and me  
_

His tears turned hot as he remembered Yibo’s unwillingness or maybe his inability to cope with their situation and Zhan’s stressful schedule.

_But you say it’s too far away, that dreams aren’t enough  
For each other to find happiness  
_

His sniffles turned to sobs as he relived Yibo’s coldness on the phone and a sudden fear clutched his heart.

_I only want to hear you say you are willing to love me  
Until the end of the world and the next century  
_

Zhan sobbed harder as he wondered why Yibo couldn't find it in him to say anything over the phone. He wondered if he had upset Yibo so much that there was nothing affectionate left for him to say. Or even something soothing. Or even something normal and friendly.

”I just want you to hold me and hug me tight,” Zhan sang out loud, his tears now uncontrollable. “I only want to hear you say you are willing to love me...but you just lower your head in silence...I really just want to hear you say it...please, please...stop avoiding it.”

His heart ached with fear and longing as he tried to wait for Yibo to become okay enough to talk to him properly again. His tears had dried up by the end of the song but his heart hadn't healed and neither had his tightening chest.

* * *

As Yibo sat quietly in his room, listening to his bitter songs playlist in an attempt to get all his emotions out and feel better so he could get it together enough to talk to Zhan, an old song came on. His tears flowed as he felt each line awaken something raw in his heart.

_I only want to hear you say you are willing to love me  
Until the end of the world and the next century  
_

He wondered if saying such words is always enough. He wondered if actions really did speak louder than words, then what did his current situation imply.

_I really only want to hear you say  
What am I in your heart..._

Yibo began sobbing as he realized that for the past two months, he had only been waiting. Waiting for Zhan to be free, waiting for Zhan to spare any amount of time so he could feel like he was in a relationship.

_Now I realize that loving you…  
Is like falling in love with loneliness._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Yibo's bitter song playlist = when Xiao Zhan was on TTXS, both he and Yibo had mentioned they liked to listening to bitter love songs and Yibo even had a separate playlist for such songs. LOL.


	179. Follow the feeling

* * *

Zhan woke up the next morning, with the tightness in his chest mild but still intact. He grabbed his phone as soon as his vision cleared and opened to check for any messages from Yibo. There were none.

He let out a long breath and suppressed his own rising ego.

> _Zhan: Goodmorning, didi  
>    
>  Zhan: Good luck for your shoot  
>    
>  Zhan: I miss you _

Zhan got out of bed and headed to the shower. 

_Just be patient, Zhan. And find a way to make this up to Yibo._

* * *

Later that evening, Zhan entered the shooting studio for Our song after a long day on the Oath of love set. He had shot several emotionally draining scenes of him losing a patient and losing himself as Dr. Gu Wei. Zhan had always found it easy to cry in a scene. The problem this time was stopping. His mind inadvertently went back to Yibo and the lack of any messages all day.

When he reached the other set, he was shown to the room where the other contestants from Group B were present. To his utter and pleasant surprise, one of the other three contestants in his group was a familiar face - Ayunga.

”Xiao Zhan!” The lively man rushed towards him, arms spread wide and embraced him.

”Oh!” Zhan exclaimed. “I didn't know you were participating in this show as well!”

”Me neither! They did a good job keeping everything under wraps. We don't even have a clue as to who the mentors are! How are you? You look tired.”

”I’m fine,” Zhan forced a polite smile and bowed. “How are you? And how’s…”

”Zhan-Zhan,” Ayunga held Zhan by the elbow and took him aside, away from the crew. “What’s the matter? You look exhausted. Are you just...overexerting or is something wrong?”

”I…,” Zhan bit his lip, trying to reel his emotions in. 

The problem with having a secret relationship was that when things weren’t going fine, you couldn't talk to anyone. And even though Ayunga knew about him and Yibo, Zhan had always been a private person who didn't like burdening people with his problems.

”It’s alright, nothing I can’t handle.” Zhan managed a smile. “But thanks for asking.”

”Okay, okay,” Ayunga patted his back. “Just know I’m here for you.”

* * *

After Zhan had performed his solo, Satisfied, he was thrilled to have been picked by both the remaining mentors. He chose the one that seemed the most excited about him and had also let it slip that she was a teacher. His main goal for coming on the show despite his crazy schedule was to train harder as a singer as singing was his other love. 

_But my first love is Wang Yibo. Always. No matter what._

When he began the duet, he knew immediately who his chosen mentor was. It was the one and only Na Ying. As he sang the duet, his heart managed to get over the lack of messages from Yibo. He felt motivation and determination course through his veins.

_Follow the feeling  
Hold the hand of the dream  
Footsteps are getting lighter and more happy  
Let's smile  
Love will leave me anywhere._

With every line, his spirit soared.

_Follow the feeling  
Let it take me with you  
Hope is waiting for me not far away  
Follow the feeling  
Let it take me with you  
There's a dream everywhere._

When Zhan was done singing, his spirit felt uplifted. He felt more optimistic. He felt even more overjoyed when Na Ying and he both matched and selected each other without a second thought.

By the time the episode shoot ended, it was nearly 11 pm and Zhan was drained. As he was about to leave, Na Ying came up to him.

”Ah, Xiao Zhan...good to finally meet you! It seems you’re quite the hot commodity in the industry right now going by the audience’s cheers!”

”No, no, Na-jie,” Zhan flushed and bowed and shook his head. “I’m just so excited to be working with you. I look forward to learning so much!”

”So polite. You are sweet. Have you given thought to the song we will perform next week?”

”Actually,” Zhan grinned sheepishly, “I had selected one of your songs before even knowing it was you who would be my mentor.”

”Oh, which one!?”

”Loving you is like loving loneliness,” Zhan’s voice dropped as did his face as some of the pain from the fight came back.

”Oh wow. Such a bitter song for such a young, lovely boy. Any particular reason?” Na Ying asked, half teasing and half concerned.

”No…,” Zhan laughed nervously, “it’s just a beautiful song...I like bitter ballads.”

”Hmm,” she gave him a kind smile. “I look forward to getting to know you more Zhan-Zhan.”

* * *

Yibo sat in his hotel room and stared at the wall. The day had been long and not just because of the long shoot. It was nearly midnight and he knew from Zhan’s numerous messages that he was on his way back home. He was ridden with guilt for not messaging Zhan since their last strained conversation. But beneath the guilt, anger and frustration still simmered.

_I don't know if I am ready to talk to him yet. What if I say something stupid and make it all worse?! But I miss him so much, I just want to hear his voice. I just want to hear him say he loves me. But I’m so angry and I don't know why I can't seem to calm it down like I usually can by just thinking of him!!_

Just then, his phone pinged with a message.

> _Zhan-ge: I’m done with showering and all  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Do you want to...talk? Or video?  
>    
>  _

Yibo’s heart broke a little as he could sense the hesitation and hurt that Zhan was probably feeling while trying to wait patiently for Yibo to give him something, anything. 

His fingers lingered over the video call button but then moved to the phone call. With a long deep breath, he dialed Zhan’s number. The call was answered almost immediately.

”Hi,” Zhan’s unsure voice spoke first.

”Hi,” Yibo sat back on his bed and replied.

Silence prevailed for sometime as both thought of what to say.

”Umm...thanks for calling,” Zhan spoke softly.

”How was your day?” Yibo asked but half heartedly.

”It was...uh...fine...yours?”

”Long,” Yibo bit his lips. “Umm…”

”Bo-di…”

”Zhan-ge…”, both spoke simultaneously when the conversation had dwindled again.

”What were you going to say?” Zhan asked, hopeful.

”I was...uh...I was going to say I have to go...I’m really tired.”

”Oh…,” Zhan’s voice grew softer.

The tightness in his chest returned and his heart dropped, losing all the motivation he had gained earlier that day while singing.

”What were you going to say?”

”I…,” Zhan grit his teeth and tried to steady his voice, “I...was just going to say good night too…sleep well.”

”Oh…,” Yibo felt a heat of irritation sweep through his body. “Okay...yeah...good night.”

Zhan opened his mouth to say something more but the next thing he heard was the silence of the call ending. He found himself whispering into a one-sided call.

”I love you, didi...I’m sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY!!! Na Ying! She will show up more in the next few chapters. Team NaZhan forever!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> Our Song Episode 3 (first episode of Group B which includes Xiao Zhan) -  
> (Xiao Zhan singing Satisfied at 51:17)  
> (Xiao Zhan/Na Ying duet at 59:330)
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHjV6naczT0
> 
> Another short clip from the episode - 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wI8TxFC84V0
> 
> Follow your heart lyrics -
> 
> https://www.echinesesong.com/gen-zhe-gan-jue-zou-%E8%B7%9F%E7%9D%80%E6%84%9F%E8%A7%89%E8%B5%B0-follow-your-heart/
> 
> https://mojim.com/cny100090x5x8.htm


	180. Answer me

* * *

When morning came, Zhan sat up, still fully awake, and checked his phone. He had pushed it aside all night to stop himself from sending Yibo hundreds of messages and maybe even a few calls. But now it was 7 am and he had to finally get out of bed for work.

> _Bo-di: I’m off to the remote location now  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’ve been told reception will be negligible  
>    
>  Bo-di: So I might not be able to talk or message much _

The message was sent two hours back and Zhan cursed himself as he realized he could have probably had a short chat with Yibo before he had left for the remote location if he had kept checking his phone.

True to his words, Yibo wasn't available that much over the course of the week and Zhan couldn't help but think if the remoteness of the location wasn't the only reason behind that. It broke his heart everyday and kept him awake every night. He ached to hear Yibo’s voice say he missed him and loved him. Always. No matter what.

He crawled his way through the days, shooting for Oath of love, magazine covers, and the myriad interviews he was invited to along with practicing two songs with Na Ying remotely and by the time night would come, the ache in his chest would increase the slightest bit more. Nonetheless, he resisted the urge to take the same medications, remembering where it had landed him the last time.

By the time it was finally time to begin shooting for Our song’s next episode, Zhan had reached the end of his patience and endurance. He was miserable, heartbroken, and scared. He had made an effort to keep messaging Yibo during his breaks but the only messages he had received from Yibo were those informing him that he was fine and how many days were left till he had proper reception on his phone again. 

When he showed up in the studio, he was briefed about what was expected of them. They had to choose a team name and start practicing their song.

”Zhan-Zhan!” Na Ying embraced him but paused when she looked at him. “You don't look so good. Are you method acting for the sad song’s performance!?” She laughed.

”Just tired, Na-jie…”

”Come here,” she paused and took him to one corner. “What is it? For the past few days you have seemed low every time we have video chatted to rehearse, and now that I see you…,” she placed a hand on his shoulder gently, “...I can tell...something is wrong.”

”I...jie, I…” Zhan began to lose his composure hearing the kindness and concern in Na Ying’s motherly voice.

She reminded him so much of his own mother, amicable, playful and compassionate. Ever since his fight with Yibo, he had missed his mother and wanted to talk to her to ease his mind but didn't want to worry his family. 

”Wait here,” Na Ying stood up, determined.

He watched as she went to the director and seemed to be in deep conversation.

”Alright, come with me...I told them I need a half hour break before shooting.” 

She dragged him to her dressing room and sat him down. 

”You look like you need someone to talk to,” she patted his leg. “Now spill.”

* * *

After over a week of shooting at the remote location, Yibo reached his hotel room once again and walked back to his room, still sullen and low. He showered, ate, and sat by the window, silently looking at the night sky. He saw the lonely star he would look at some times. It had been a long time since he had searched for it. But over the last week, he had gazed at it every night. 

Inadvertently, his eyes would always find the other lonely star beside it and his mind immediately went to Zhan. He missed Zhan dearly but a part of him knew that he had not taken the few chances he had over the week to go to a place with enough network to contact Zhan. He wasn't sure why he didn't do it, if he was still angry, if he was still hurt, if he was just punishing Zhan, or if he just didn't know what to say to him any more.

With an exasperated groan, Yibo took his phone and finally decided to deal with his emotions. He sent a text message on the group chat with his TTXS brothers, frustrated and clueless.

> _Yibo: Anyone free for a quick call?  
>    
>  Yibo: Need relationship advice _

Within minutes, his phone lit up with a video call from Wang Han.

”Are you alright, Yibo?” Wang Han’s concerned voice spoke.

”No.” Before Yibo knew what was happening, he burst into tears.

”Ah, Yibo...Yibo...it’s okay...take your time, I’m here for you,” Wang Han spoke gently.

”I...I don't know what’s happening, ge...suddenly everything seems to be imploding!”

”What happened with Zhan-Zhan?”

”I messed...we messed...I don't know...how, why, when...but we’re messing this up!”

* * *

”A-Zhan, ah A-Zhan,” Na Ying shook her head and clucked her tongue when Zhan was done explaining the entire situation to her.

”I know...I fucked up...” Zhan’s eyes widened. “I mean I messed up.”

”It’s alright,” she laughed. “It’s good you know you messed up. But it’s okay...it happens...it’s not the end of the world.”

”Then why does it feel like it is?” Zhan whispered as he placed his hands on his thigh and looked down.

”I have never met your girlfriend,” she massaged his back to console him, “But I have had enough life experience to know one thing…”

Zhan felt a pang of guilt at his lie but he wasn't sure if he could trust Na Ying with the truth about him and Yibo.

”...all relationships are hard,” she continued, “but if it is true love...it’s worth it. You have to put in the work to make time for the relationship, for your partner, to build and strengthen the bond. You have to prioritize her. It takes true perseverance and determination to see a love through till the end. But what it gives in return….is irreplaceable. And most importantly, especially in this industry...which is so harsh and unforgiving. It demands everything from you but what it gives in return is never more valuable than what your loved ones give you.”

”I know, Na-jie...but I...I don't know what to do...I am just beginning my career...and I feel so passionate about my work...but I also love him…” Zhan’s eyes widened and he clamped his hand on his mouth.

”Oh,” Na Ying sat back and eyed Zhan carefully. “So it’s not a _girlfriend_?”

Zhan gulped and his fingers fidgeted with the hem of his shirt. 

"Answer me..."

Slowly, terrified, he shook his head and then waited for the axe to drop.

* * *

”Yibo, ah Yibo,” Wang Han smiled. “It’s okay...you need to calm down. It’s not as bad as you think.”

”It isn’t?” Yibo looked at Wang Han with wide innocent eyes.

”You’re still a child and you’re new at this. But relationships require understanding and compassion, especially when it’s not smooth-sailing. Do you think it’s easy being in this industry and having a relationship, any relationship let alone a secret one? But I've seen how happy Zhan-Zhan makes you. So it looks like it’s worth it. And you have to remember, Yibo...you were trained for this life. Zhan wasn't. You have had years of success and years of time to learn how to handle it and navigate this industry. Zhan has not. He is still new to his fame, still adjusting to the pace of his success. And don't forget about his problems with Wajijiwa, he barely has any control over his career right now. He has to take what he gets to build on the success of your show. What did he have to say for himself?”

”He apologized...a lot…”

”And?”

”I...I haven't spoken to him much since then,” Yibo looked away.

”Ah...the famous cold shoulder,” Wang Han smiled sadly. “How will anything ever get sorted if you block him out?”

”I...I was…unable to...”

”You know better than me if you really couldn't talk to him or didn't want to,” Wang Han interrupted Yibo. “All I will say is that you should give it time. Once he settles into it, he will find the balance. Do you think you have it in you to be patient and understanding till then? If not, then you’re wasting both your time.”

* * *

”Oh, A-Zhan!” Na Ying walked over to Zhan and knelt beside him. “You don't have to hide from me. I know we’re just getting to know each other but I understand...trust me...my son has a boyfriend too,” she lowered her voice but maintained a kind, loving tone.

”Oh, really?” Zhan met her gaze.

She nodded and then ruffled his hair.

”But either way...my advice remains the same. You’re old enough to handle all of this. You need to get it together. I know you can. You seem like a smart boy and it sounds like you love him deeply.”

”I do,” Zhan replied abruptly and then blushed. “I just feel like I’m failing him. All the time.”

”Oh sweetie,” she placed a hand on his cheek. “You’re not failing. You’re only human. As long as you two figure this out together as a team, it will all be okay. Trust me.”

”How can we figure this out as a team if he cuts me out every time he gets angry…”

”Talk to him when he’s ready...learning how to fight is a big part of learning how to be in a relationship,” she chuckled. 

Zhan smiled and wiped the tears that had stained his cheeks. He nodded and then stood up and shook off his last few sighs and tears and looked at Na Ying ready to go. She nodded with a smile and led him back to the stage.

"So what about our second song for this episode, are you sure you still want to do the one you picked?" She pursed her lips and looked at Zhan.

"Yes...I'm not backing out," Zhan nodded, determined.

"I'm guessing now...that this song also has something to do with your dearest one and only?" She chuckled and shook her head. "What was it called again?"

"Yes it does," Zhan smiled fondly, "and the song is called...Green Light."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Timeline wise we are somewhere in the period of Sep 26-Oct 4, 2019.
> 
> Our song episode 4, Xiao Zhan's second episode -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrM-OKZ4Dcg  
> (2:30 - 6:45 --- NaZhan come up with team name and just act so goddamn cute)  
> (13:15 - 23:45 --- NaZhan practicing and performing Loving you is like loving loneliness)  
> (1:04:30 - 1:14:00) --- NaZhan practicing and performing Green Light)
> 
> Just the audio recordings of them - 
> 
> Loving you is like loving loneliness -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4cxK3_Yw_0
> 
> Green Light -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gur-75bWLfw


	181. I'm still the same

* * *

When Zhan was done shooting Our song that night, there was still no text from Yibo.

_It’s okay, Zhan. He is off shooting in some remote location plus he has every right to be mad at you. But once Yibo is back, you both WILL talk about this and sort it out. Everything will go back to the way it was. Don’t worry!_

__

He scrolled through Weibo as he made his way to his next commitment, a short interview profile. He missed Yibo and so began looking him up online when he came across a fancam that froze him.

__

It was a short video of Yibo entering his hotel, bodyguard and bags in tow.

__

_He’s back to his hotel from that remote location?_

__

Zhan went back to his chat box with Yibo and refreshed it several times to see if any new messages would show up. But there were none.

__

_This was two hours ago. Maybe he was too tired to message me._ Zhan’s heart sank. _But not even one message?_

__

Zhan’s heart broke as he realized Yibo hadn't had an affectionate conversation with him for over a week now. He hadn't heard a _Zhan-ge_ or _sweetie_ let alone an _I miss you_ or _I love you_ from him and it hurt.

__

_Is what I did so bad? Do I really deserve this cold treatment of over a week?_

__

With a long sigh, he massaged his chest and decided to not jump to any conclusions. He had an important interview with Ma Wei Wei and it was a privilege to have a profile done by her. 

__

”Ah, Wei Wei jie,” Zhan smiled as soon as he saw the woman appear on set. 

__

”Ah, Xiao Zhan! So good to see you. The last time we saw each other was 2015!”

__

”No, 2017!” 

__

”Ah, maybe you’re right...alright, are you ready to do this?”

__

_No._ Zhan thought as he tried to suppress his emotions. _But I want to just get through this so I can talk to Yibo...hear his voice...just once._

__

”Yes, jie…” he nodded and sat down beside her.

__

As they breezed through the questions, Zhan began to relax. But one question caught him off guard. 

__

”We work so tirelessly,” she looked at Zhan carefully. “It must be for something right? I work for money. You work so much...what is it for?”

__

Zhan felt his breath hitch as he thought back to his ongoing issue with Yibo. He regained his composure as he began answering.

__

”When I began in this industry, I did this because I wanted to be seen, to be noticed and acknowledged. If you ask me now…,” he paused as his lips trembled thinking of an answer.

__

_Why am I doing this? Na-jie said in the end all that matters is your loved ones. I know that but I’m still going after my dreams like a mad man. Is that so wrong? All I am asking for is some time._

__

”If you ask me now, I am working so hard so that I can have the power of choice.”

__

_So that in time, I can pick and choose what I do and have some control over my career to maintain a work life balance and give the love of my life the attention he deserves._

__

He had to lie his way through the questions about relationships but he managed to draw on his ever growing acting experience.

__

_I have to lie about it to protect it. It’s just the way it is._ He reminded himself.

__

The next set of questions went smoothly enough until one came and knocked Zhan off his feet.

__

”Are there people who deliberately avoid you after your rise in fame?”

__

Zhan clenched his fist under the table. The words sent a jolt through his body. Even though the words were not directed at his current situation, they hit hard. Yibo had been avoiding him instead of communicating and facing the issue. And it hurt.

__

With a trembling nod, Zhan replied.

__

”There are.” His lips quivered. “And I understand. I don't like to trouble others or be a burden.”

__

_And if that’s what I’m becoming to Yibo...if he isn't happy...then what’s the point. He is totally justified in avoiding me if that’s how much I’ve hurt him._

__

”And you feel that some friends have drifted away?” She prodded.

__

Zhan saw no way around it. His emotions were beginning to spill over and he was never good at keeping his emotions reigned in.

__

”To be honest, it makes me very sad to talk about this.” He began choking on his words and he could feel the back of his eyes burn.

__

Zhan took a second to stop himself from crying.

__

_How do I show him that I’m still the same? What do I do?!_

__

”Sometimes,” he began slowly, “I just want to plead to the world...that I’m still the same...I’m still the same Xiao Zhan...I haven't changed..nothing’s changed.”

__

_Nothing’s changed, my love. Please. Nothing’s changed, didi._

__

”I’m the same as before. But they perhaps feel that I have changed.” He spoke dejectedly, more and more disappointed in himself. “Emotions are so...subtle. You can't pinpoint the exact point at which they begin changing. One slight off stroke and everything changes. Sometimes,” he took a deep breath, “reality is too cruel.”

__

Then, Ma Wei Wei asked another question.

__

”So what do you do when you have a breakdown?”

__

”I would...um...try to find some release...or cry...or drink till I drop…although I have low alcohol tolerance…”

__

_I need a drink. If he won't talk to me or even message me properly and there’s nothing else I can do until he is back, I need to be fucking drunk so I forget everything._

__

The remaining questions helped lighten Zhan’s mood. But he got emotional once again when he spoke about one of his fans who had found the love of her life and married him and had shared with Zhan how happy she was.

__

_That’s all I want too._ Zhan thought wistfully as his chest tightened further. _I just want Yibo. I want my love to last forever. I want to be with him forever. I want our happy ending. Is that too much to ask for?_

__

When the interview was over, Zhan exchanged pleasantries with Ma Wei Wei and then took his leave. It was nearly midnight and he rushed his driver to get home, picking up a six pack of beer on his way.

__

As soon as he reached home, Zhan didn't waste any more time. He grabbed a beer, crashed onto the couch, turned the TV on and drank quickly. The entire time, he had one eye on his phone waiting for it to ping with a message or a call or anything. Nothing happened even as he finished his second beer. With each sip, tears slid down his cheeks. He let them flow, unwilling and unable to console himself any more.

__

Zhan was almost through his third beer and it was almost midnight when his phone finally lit up with a video call. His heart hitched as he realized it was Yibo. He could feel the alcohol that had taken effect already, coursing through him. Flushed and flustered, he straightened his hair and patted his cheeks dry before answering the call. As soon as he did and before he could say anything, Yibo spoke first.

”Happy birthday, ge.”

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Xiao Zhan’s 7 question interview with Ma Wei Wei - 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5qqGYYhXRY  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFu0peT2dJs  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHqafVSNV5w  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGBoxIOF5AE  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EUsShNVWM58


	182. Why would he though

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY YOU GUYS! I've crossed 150 bookmarks, 200 subscriptions, 1200 kudos and 25k views!!???!!!?! 
> 
> WHAT EVEN IS MY LIFE?!?! THANKS!!!! 
> 
> I'm so happy imma post the next chapter now and maybe even more tonight!!!

* * *

”Happy birthday, ge,” Yibo managed a small smile.

”Birth….birthday?” Zhan blinked at the screen in confusion.

”It’s your birthday...wait,” Yibo seemed to be checking something on his phone. “Yeah...it’s past midnight now...officially your birthday...did you forget?”

”Oh,” Zhan pursed his lips, “I...I didn't realize…”

_How could I with everything going on?_ Zhan thought sadly.

”Are you...okay?”

”Na...I mean yeah...just tired...,” Zhan placed the phone against a book on the coffee table and laid down on the couch and gave him a tired but genuine smile.

”Ge,” Yibo looked at him carefully, “were you...are you drunk?”

”No, just a little tipsy...but I’m totally fine...I just need to release some stress...it’s been a long day.”

”Did something happen?” Yibo asked.

”No...just...,” Zhan looked at Yibo with a sad, lost face.

”Ge, I know that we haven't…,” Yibo began but looked away, “but...I…"

Yibo didn't know what to say.

”Bo-di, I…,” Zhan mumbled as his eyes began drooping.

When Yibo looked back at the screen, he saw Zhan’s closed eyes and sleeping face. Something in his heart fluttered for the first time in over a week. 

_He looks so tired and fragile._ Yibo gazed at him sadly. _And this fight is making it worse._

He thought back to Wang Han’s words.

_Do you think you have it in you to be patient and understanding?_

Yibo’s eyes roamed Zhan’s face. He observed the oily eyelids that indicated just how exhausted Zhan was. He noticed the dark undereyes that told him Zhan had probably not slept in a while. He saw the redness on Zhan’s cheeks and knew that he had been drinking alone which he only did when he was extremely stressed or extremely sad. 

He admired the long eyelashes that grazed the cheeks ever so lightly, the perfect nose and the soft lips that were slightly parted as Zhan slept soundly. His eyes couldn't help but pause on the mole at the corner of his lips. 

After allowing himself a few more seconds to gaze at Zhan, Yibo finally cut the call. 

* * *

When Zhan woke up, his alarm was ringing loudly. He scrambled for his phone, still half asleep, and when he found it on the coffee table, shut the alarm off with a grunt. He curled up on the couch, turning the other side, and sighed.

_I was having such a good dream. Yibo calling me...seeing his beautiful face again...smiling at me...he wished me happy birthday…wait..._

Zhan’s eyes flew open and he sat up with a jerk. 

”Did...that happen?!” He exclaimed. “Fuck.”

Zhan grabbed his phone and gasped when he saw that he had, in fact, been on a three minute video call with Yibo.

”Fuck….did he really wish me a happy birthday? Is it my birthday?” He checked the date. “Apparently it is.”

”What did we talk about for three minutes?!” Zhan groaned and dragged a hand down his face.

Zhan quickly opened his chat with Yibo and sure enough, there were unread messages from Yibo.

> _Bo-di: Happy birthday again, Zhan-ge_

Zhan’s heart skipped a beat when he saw Yibo address him as _Zhan-ge_ after such a long time.

> _Bo-di: I’m pretty sure you don't remember our conversation last night because you were drunk_

Zhan pursed his lips and frowned.

_Dammit!!_

> _Bo-di: So just to remind you, you dozed off almost immediately  
>    
>  Bo-di: So we didn't...get a chance to...talk  
>    
>  Bo-di: I have a long day at the studio today but will be back in Beijing late in the night  
>    
>  Bo-di: Maybe we can...talk then...I can come over or...you can come over...or whatever...anything works  
>    
>  Bo-di: I have to go now...I’ll...see you soon _

Zhan kept refreshing the chat to see if there was another last sentence but that was it.

_No I love you or I miss you but that’s okay. At least he’s messaging me again and he wants to see me and talk. It’s something!_

> _Zhan: Sorry, didi...I didn't realize when I fell asleep  
>    
>  Zhan: Thanks for calling me...I forgot it’s my birthday  
>    
>  Zhan: And yeah...umm...either way works for me too _

Zhan wanted to type more but at this point, wasn't sure of anything.

_What if...what if what he wants to talk about is not what I want to hear. What if...he’s decided to end things? I...I can't tell with the way he’s been behaving….does he even love me anymore? But then why would he call to wish me at midnight. But then why isn't he saying he loves me or misses me?!_

__

With a long exhale, he decided to end the message there and not push his luck with Yibo.

__

_At the very least he is chatting with me now. If he is still hurting or has decided to end things, I don't want to push him away by burdening him with my emotions._

__

Zhan noticed another notification on Weibo and to his surprise, it was of a post by Yibo. His eyes widened when he opened the app to see Yibo’s birthday post dedicated to him. It was a photo from the Untamed shooting where they were goofing around and laughing.

__

Zhan smiled a little as he thought of all the happy memories that were attached with that summer.

__

_He still cares about me._

__

Zhan felt a little silly for thinking that Yibo would want to break up and he felt even sillier for having dozed off on the video call. Chuckling at himself, he typed out his response.

__

_Thank you, Lao-Wang! I slept early and missed the whole world! 😂_

He opened his chat with Yibo again and typed another message.

> _Zhan: I'll see you soon, didi_

Zhan scrolled through his texts and was surprised when he received one by Xuan Lu. She wished him as well and let him know that she wanted to come over to his shooting location for Oath of love along with Zhoucheng. His heart warmed that she wanted to keep the tradition alive and celebrate his birthday with him. 

__

_Last year Yibo was there too._ Zhan sighed as he replied to her. _I hope that isn't the only the birthday I will ever celebrate with him._

* * *

__

That night, Yibo packed his bags in anticipation. He was too restless to sit and too impatient to get home once again. Zhan had been updating him all day and it warmed Yibo’s heart to see the effort Zhan was putting. But suddenly the messages had stopped after he had informed him that Xuan Lu and the rest were about to begin his birthday celebrations.

__

A little annoyed and miffed, Yibo decided to check Zhan’s whereabouts on Weibo when it had been a few hours. It was almost 8 pm and there was no further message from Zhan.

__

When he looked him up, however, he was left in shock. The first video, in fact the first ten videos, that showed up when he looked Zhan up on Weibo was of a crazed crowd clambering around Zhan’s car as he walked to it from a hotel. 

__

But what made Yibo gasp in horror was when he saw one of the fans reach out for Zhan and in an attempt to touch him, accidentally slammed him on the head. He saw Zhan place his hand on the offended spot above his forehead and rush into the car. 

__

All the videos were of the same incident from different angles and Yibo sat down on the bed abruptly when he saw, in one clearer and closer video, how affected and vulnerable Zhan looked.

__

Amidst the videos of the incident and photos of Zhan celebrating with Xuan Lu, Zhoucheng, Yang Zi and some other friends, Yibo stumbled across a few that made his eyes blow up wider.

__

They were of a very angry Zhoucheng storming to his car. When Yibo raised the volume of the video and read the comments, he realized what had pissed the otherwise angelic Zhoucheng off. Some antis and sasaeng fans of him and Zhan were badmouthing Zhoucheng and there were gossip rumors that Zhoucheng had come between him and Zhan which was why Yibo was not at Zhan’s birthday.

__

”FUCK.” Yibo grit his teeth. “FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. Who are these crazy people who call themselves our fans?!!??! What the fuck is wrong with them, coming at an innocent person like that?! Harming my Zhan-ge like that?!? What the fuck!?!?”

__

Yibo punched the bed and growled. It took him several minutes to calm himself down. When his phone pinged, he rolled his eyes and unlocked his phone again.

__

”Who the fuck is messaging me at this time of the…”

__

He paused when he saw a message from Zhan.

__

> __
> 
> _Zhan-ge: The birthday celebrations went well  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Can’t wait to see you  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: The X-Nine boys are throwing me a small party for my birthday and to celebrate the success of Jade Dynasty  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m sending you the address in case you want to come there  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: If not, let me know and I’ll get back home when you land  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Have a safe flight tonight, didi _
> 
> __

_  
_

Yibo couldn't help but soften at the way Zhan tried to shield him from what had happened but he also felt annoyed that Zhan wasn't sharing how he was feeling.

__

_Why would he though? I’ve been giving him the cold shoulder for so long...he probably just doesn’t want to burden me until we talk things out._

__

> __
> 
> _Yibo: I’ll be there, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: I’ll see you soon _

__  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The good -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e4l4RhvDfcU  
> https://twitter.com/zhanxiao1005_/status/1180164601503084549  
> https://lanzhanlanzhan.tumblr.com/post/188139832033/aaaawww-wang-yibo-greeted-xiao-zhan-on-weibo
> 
> The bad -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvCA_793VY8&t=8s
> 
> And the ugly -  
> https://twitter.com/yiboism0/status/1180754173698199553?lang=en  
> https://twitter.com/yiboism0/status/1180777813584093184


	183. Why can't I?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm seeing some new readers here now, so sharing my [twitter](https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan) again. 
> 
> Come find me and say hi!!!

* * *

It was midnight by the time Yibo landed. He raced through security and baggage claim and sat down in his car with a huff, rushing his driver to get him home. According to Zhan’s last message, he was still at the hotel where the X-Nine boys had arranged the celebration.

When he got home, he changed hurriedly and then picked up his helmet, the one that Zhan had gifted him and took his bike keys. On reaching the venue, his heart began racing. It dawned on him that this was the first time he was going to see Zhan since all the chaos and fighting.

_Is it even a fight if we didn't actually fight? I just...never said anything. For almost two weeks._

Suddenly, Yibo grew nervous. Nervous about meeting Zhan. Nervous about not knowing what to say. Nervous about everything that might or might not happen once they finally saw each other. His mouth felt dry and his fingers were fidgeting as he made his way to the back entrance. He shuffled around anxiously as the elevator made its way up to the top floor. 

When he reached the hall, however, he couldn't see Zhan anywhere.

”Yibo?” A cheery voice called out to him.

Yibo turned towards it and saw Wu Jiacheng making his way over to where he stood. Yibo nodded and shook hands with the boy.

”I didn't know you were coming! This is fantastic.”

”Hmm, I just landed...where’s Zhan-ge?”

”Actually,” Wu Jiacheng looked around, “I haven't seen him in a while. “Come inside first! I’m sure he’s around here somewhere. Come say hi to everyone...it’s been so long since we saw you!”

Yibo followed the boy inside and was greeted by the X-Nine boys. One by one he shook hands with them and was even introduced to the significant others of some of them. He noticed Chu Yue join them with a drink in his hand, alone.

”Oh,” Chu Yue stood beside Yibo, “you made it?”

”You knew I was coming?”

”Zhan-Zhan mentioned it...in passing,” Chu Yue shrugged. 

Yibo grit his teeth but then remembered something Zhan had said.

”So I’ve met everyone’s partners...where’s yours?” He asked Chu Yue while the others were engrossed in their own conversations.

”Who?” Chu Yue looked confused for a second. “Oh...yeah...my partner...he couldn't make it tonight…”

”Uhuh,” Yibo narrowed his eyes as he grew suspicious. 

”Yibo-ge!” Yan Xujia sauntered over and bumped his fist on Yibo’s shoulder. “How have you been? Everyone’s so busy...you...Zhan-ge…”

”Where _is_ Zhan-ge?” Yibo asked the pouting boy. “It’s been a while and I still don't see him,” Yibo tried to keep the annoyance out of his voice.

”He had to take a call,” Chu Yue answered. “Must have taken it to one of the other rooms down the hall.”

”He works too much!” Yan Xujia exclaimed. “He looked so tired and was even feeling sick…”

”Wait...what?” Yibo interrupted. “He’s sick?”

”Yeah...had a fever but of course he said he was just tired…,” Yan Xujia rolled his eyes.

”You didn't know he was sick?” Chu Yue asked bluntly with an astonished almost accusatory expression on his face.

”I...I was at…,” Yibo began but was interrupted by Chu Yue.

”At work? But why wouldn't he text you if he was sick?”

Yibo clenched his teeth. It took all his willpower to not react to Chu Yue’s words and implied jabs. He took his phone out and tried calling Zhan. But it seemed that Zhan was, still, on the other call. 

”I’m just going to go look for him,” Yibo put his phone back in his pocket and walked away without so much as a glance at Chu Yue.

He exited the banquet hall and walked down the hallway. With pursed lips, he peeked into the other halls but couldn't see Zhan in any of them. He bit his lips and pulled his phone out to text Zhan.

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge...I’m here  
>    
>  Yibo: Where are you? _

_Where are you, Zhan-ge?!_ He let out a long sigh and groaned.

Yibo decided to head to the restroom to be thorough in his search. He entered the washroom but there was no one there. He paused in front of the mirror and looked at himself.

_Zhan-ge is sick and didn't tell me. He got injured and didn't tell me. He hasn't been sleeping...even got drunk alone but didn't tell me. Is it my fault? Is it because of how distant I’ve been? He should have still told me. I was mad at him. I’m still mad at him. But I want to know if something’s wrong. I would never not want to know what’s wrong with him. But with the way I’ve been behaving, can I blame him?_

With a dejected look, Yibo splashed some water on his face and let out a long exhale. He let the water drip down as he continued to stare at himself in the mirror, unable to make sense of all the conflicted feelings inside him. The only constant was the words Wang Han had uttered.

_Do you think you have it in you to be patient and understanding?_

Yibo shook his head to disperse the chaotic thoughts in his head and made his way outside once again. When he was back in the hallway, he heard a door open and out walked Zhan.

Both of them froze in their spot as soon as they saw each other. Time seemed to stand still with them for a brief moment as neither knew if the other was really standing in front of them and neither knew what to say.

They stared at each other, eyes unmoving. 

_Yibo…? It’s...Yibo?! Is he actually here in front of me!?_ Zhan blinked in astonishment.

_Zhan-ge...is he actually really here right now...it’s him!?_ Yibo’s heart raced.

They stood in painful silence as neither knew what to do or say. 

_I wish I could just hug and kiss him like always but he has barely shown any affection towards me that I don't know if he would want it. Maybe I should be more patient and wait till we talk and sort everything out._ Zhan felt his entire body grow restless and heavy as he held himself back.

_I wish everything didn't feel so different, so unsure, so awkward. Why don't I know what to do or say? Why can't I just smile at him or just reach out and pull him into my arms. When did this distance come between us? When did this invisible wall come up?_ Yibo felt a heavy frustration overwhelm him. 

For several seconds, neither moved. Then, Zhan gulped and decided to make the first move.

”Bo-di...you made it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The success of Jade Dynasty, the movie that starred Xiao Zhan as the lead hero for the first time -
> 
> http://www.xinhuanet.com/english/2019-09/30/c_138436466.htm  
> https://variety.com/2019/film/news/china-box-office-jade-dynasty-in-front-1203336898/


	184. One day, you have to stop

* * *

”Bo-di...you made it.”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded. “Hi…”

”Hi…,” Zhan nodded back.

Another few seconds of painful silence followed which was once again broken by Zhan.

”Uhh...I was actually...I need to leave...do you want to...come too?”

”Uhh...yeah...no point in me staying…,” Yibo shrugged. “But you’re leaving already?”

”I just needed to stop by the studio for a quick minute and…”

”Are you kidding me?” Yibo chuckled in frustration and began walking away down the hallway. “I can’t...I can't have the same fight again…”

”Huh? What?” Zhan followed Yibo further down the corridor. “Yibo...wait…”

“Are you SERIOUSLY going to work...now?! At 1 am? On your birthday...when you’re injured...and haven't slept in forever...and have a fever…?” 

”Huh?” Zhan’s eyes widened, confused. “I...I’m not injured.”

”I saw the video, ge,” Yibo looked at Zhan as they stepped out onto the terrace, away from their echoes in the corridor.

”Oh...it’s nothing…just a small scratch...and I’m fine...I’m not sick….” 

”Xujia told me you have a fever…,” Yibo clutched the railing.

No...didi, I’m fine...it was because I was hungover and didn't get much sleep…,” Zhan stood in front of him.

”And how many nights has it been since you slept properly?!” Yibo clenched his jaw.

”Not too many, didi...just some late night shoots...and I don't need to work right now, I just need to stop by the studio and…”

”And what, ge?!!” Yibo’s voice flared.

Zhan froze, stunned at the outburst. He felt his chest constrict and his head throb. Yibo’s loudness sent a sharp pain shooting from his head to his chest.

”Why didn't you tell me any of this?! Answer me, ge. Why am I only hearing about all this from other people?!?”

”BECAUSE YOU CUT ME OUT!” Zhan felt himself explode as his head pounded harder with Yibo’s raging tone.

This time, it was Yibo’s turn to freeze. He could see Zhan breathing unsteadily and his own breathing had turned heavy.

”I…I…,” Yibo began but didn't know what to say.

”It’s been so long that we’ve been fighting like this and it hurts that you can't find it in you to talk to me about it. You cut me out. Completely!! For over a week. I was wrong in what I did, Bo-di...I know that...I do...I hurt you...I’m sorry...but I didn't do it on purpose…and…” 

“It’s never your fault, ge!” Yibo finally found his voice again. “But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt! That doesn’t mean I can have this same fight over and over again!”

”So what, didi...you’ll just never talk to me when you’re angry? What do you want me to do…,” an exasperated Zhan ran his hands through his hair, “...tell me...please...what will fix this?! I will do it. Anything. Just talk to me!”

”I want you to realize what you’re doing!!” Yibo exclaimed. “How overworked you are...how you’re letting your job take over your entire life...and because of it everything is getting affected...your health...your time with your family...even us!!!”

”What do you mean, Bo-di!? Am I...am I ruining us?!” Zhan’s voice quivered with fear and irritation.

”I don’t...I…,” Yibo fumbled for words but with a groan went on. “We have met each other like what?! Thrice barely in the last almost three months! That’s once a month, ge! Barely! And that too sometimes even when we’re in the same city! You’re never around….you’re never there…we’re not even...fuck, we’re not even living together any more!!!”

”You,” Zhan couldn't believe his ears. “You said you understood why we had to do that! Why are you throwing that in my face now? And you knew this when we started the relationship. Yibo! You knew how our jobs were. You know how crazy it can get.”

”But this has gone out of control! Your schedule is beyond crazy!!”

”The only difference is that earlier you were the more busy one, Yibo! And I was supportive then!”

”Ge! Even then we never had to wait months to meet! There is a balance...and you are nowhere close to it!! 

”I’m trying my best, Yibo!” Zhan threw his hands in the air. “I’m trying...I just need time…give me time…,” he pleaded.

“Look at your own health, ge. You’re weak, tired, and fatigued most of the time!!”

”I am fine! I am just working hard...you know how it is...I have this one chance to establish myself...I don't want to be a one time wonder...I want to get to a point where I can choose what I want to do...then my schedule will be better, Bo-di! I have to make it happen NOW...I’m already 28!”

”Enough with the age crap, ge! I’ve said this before and I’m saying it again… that’s all in your head. You will still get amazing offers because you are talented and handsome and hardworking. Fuck the age thing...these are all old rules that are meant to be fucking broken!”

”Just because you rebel against the rules doesn’t mean we’re all built that way, Yibo!”

”One day, you have to stop and realize that you need to maintain a balance in life otherwise you’ll end up wrecking everything.”

"What are you saying?” Zhan’s lips trembled and his voice went low.

”We can't go on like this, ge! This doesn’t even feel like a relationship anymore! You have to find the balance!”

”Yibo are you fucking serious?! Are you giving me an ultimatum?!” Zhan clutched his chest.

”No, ge….all I’m saying is...”

”What?! What are you saying?!” Zhan finally lost his ability to remain logical. “That I should stop working so much so I can stay at home with you!? Do you want me to go back to not working and struggling to find a job just so you can have a boyfriend to cuddle with!?”

”Xiao Zhan!!”

”Wang Yibo!”

Both shivered in the wind and stared at each other, angry and distressed.

”Why can't you be more supportive?!” Zhan broke the silence.

”Are you saying I haven't been understanding and supportive so far?! Is what I’m asking so big and unreasonable!?”

”What do you want from me, Wang Yibo!?? What? What do you want me to do! What do we need to do!?”

”Fuck! I can't deal with...I can't talk to you right now...maybe we need to take a fucking break!!!”

”A break from us?” Zhan quietened.

”I don't know….just a break,” Yibo groaned and ran his hands through his hair.

Zhan remained quiet, observing Yibo’s frustrated face. Then, without a word, he left the terrace. Yibo watched him leave and didn't stop him. After a few more seconds, he left the terrace and walked in the opposite direction and stormed off towards his bike.


	185. Then don't reject me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> content warning: panic attack

* * *

Zhan walked hastily as his heart began racing. He clutched his chest and entered the room at the end of the corridor, far enough that he could no longer hear the music and noise of the event at the party that was meant for him. 

He closed the door behind him and rushed to the window. He opened it and leaned forward, gasping for air. The cool breeze did nothing to calm his nerves. He grabbed the ledge and shut his eyes tight, trying to count down from ten. It didn't work.

Involuntarily, images of Yibo came up in his mind but this time they weren’t images of a smiling Yibo. Instead, they were of a hurt, angry, distant, cold Yibo. Tears began gushing down as he broke into sobs.

”Xiao Zhan?!” An alarmed voice entered the room behind Zhan.

”Wa...Wa…,” Zhan breathed heavily, “Wang Yibo?”

Zhan turned around still panting, gasping for air, and through his tears he saw, not the familiar figure that he was hoping for, but another familiar figure that was rushing towards him.

”Zhan-Zhan? What..are you...are you okay?”

”Chu Yue?”

”What...what’s happening? How can I help? Why are you...”

”I just,” Zhan began loosening his collar and opening the first button of his shirt. “I just need air...I need to calm down...I think I’m having a panic attack.”< /p>

”What?!?! I should get help...wait here,” Chu Yue turned around but was stopped by a trembling hand clutching his wrist.

”No...I don't want to cause a scene...please…”

Chu Yue gulped and nodded. He stood by Zhan and watched helplessly as Zhan tried taking deep breaths. He fell to his knees alongside Zhan when Zhan’s legs buckled, even as Zhan crushed his wrist.

 _Yibo._ Zhan’s mind chanted. _Yibo. Yibo. Please don't leave me. Please come back._

* * *

After what seemed like forever, Zhan felt his heart stop trying to run away from him. He sat back against the wall and let out a long exhale, dropping his head back.

”What the fuck was that?” Chu Yue sat beside him, his eyes fixed on Zhan.

”I just...I got a little claustrophobic and had to get some air.”

”Don't lie to me...you said you had a panic attack...and right after you had a fight with Yibo,” Chu Yue frowned.

”Huh? How did you...no...we didn’t…”

”I heard you guys fighting and saw him storm out. Then I tried finding you and ultimately got here….”

”Thank you, but we’re...I’m fine now,” Zhan stood up with a sigh.

”Wait,” Chu Yue stood up as well and caught hold of Zhan’s wrist to stop him.

”What’s going on? Have you guys been fighting? Why are you having a panic attack for a fight?”

”I said it’s fine...I need to go...I think I should go hom…,” Zhan paused as his mind suddenly dreaded the thought of going to his apartment.

”Wait...stop,,” Chu Yue grabbed him tighter and turned him around. “What’s going on, Zhan-Zhan?” 

”Nothing,” Zhan sighed and shook his head. “I really should go…”

Chu Yue drew closer and placed a hand on his cheek.

Zhan flinched and took a step back, pulling his face away.

”Please, Chu Yue. Let go.” Zhan whispered.

”I won't...until you tell me what’s going on. I’m worried, Zhan-Zhan...I care about you,” Chu Yue took another step closer and held both of Zhan’s hands in his. ”Are you happy, Zhan-Zhan?”

”Chu Yue.” Zhan spoke softly, gently pulling his hands back, “I am.”

”You don't seem happy,” Chu Yue placed his hands on Zhan’s arms and held him in place.

“Just because...,” Zhan stuttered, “just because Wang Yibo and I are going through a...,” he looked away, “it doesn’t mean that you and me...I still love him. Nothing can happen between...us…,” Zhan looked at Chu Yue and spoke with resolution but kindness.

”You don't mean that...you haven't even given us a chance...I can make you happy...I will follow you wherever you go, whatever you do...I won't demand anything...I just want to be your shadow…”

”Chu Yue…”

”I’ve held onto these feelings for years now, Zhan-Zhan...I’ve poured them into my songs...don’t you remember...the one you sang...the one I wrote for you...couldn't you tell...it was for you...it’s always been for you...we have always worked so well together...we have always created magic together...why can't we do that now too?”

”What are you talking about...what song...what words…?” Zhan looked at Chu Yue, confused.

Chu Yue took a deep breath and began humming a familiar tune.

_Following your way, secretly hoping you would see me behind you  
The wind has blown over and over, but you remain the same  
And I will never stop following you...  
...I just want to step on your shadow, with a smile on my face  
Persistently all my life, trying to carve you into my memory  
Following you for a long way, secretly hoping you would see me behind you  
The wind has blown over and over, but you remain the same  
And I will never stop following you…_

Zhan froze as his mind remembered the time they had worked on the song together. He hadn't noticed it then but now as he looked back knowing what he knew, he could see it. 

The long gazes, the soft smiles, the loving words. Chu Yue had been in love with him. Chu Yue had always followed him wordlessly. Chu Yue had never questioned him. Chu Yue had never walked away from him. He had walked away from Chu Yue.

”Please...don’t...don't make me reject you again.” Zhan gulped.

”Then don't reject me. Give me a chance,” Chu Yue took another step closer until his face was mere inches from Zhan’s face.

”I...I love Yibo…,” Zhan whispered.

”Then why are you here with me instead of with him? And where is he? He left you...” Chu Yue placed a hand on Zhan’s cheek gently.

Zhan flinched under the touch and took a step back unsteadily but was stopped when Chu Yue slid his hand to the back of Zhan’s head. Zhan watched in astonishment as Chu Yue began closing the gap between them and pulled him closer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Peng Chu Yue wrote and Xiao Zhan sang (one of my asbolute fav, they did create magic!) -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-yFFaK48N4 
> 
> Chu Yue and Xiao Zhan moments -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8he2Kw1qpI  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eLywh6ICKc


	186. Come with me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *SCREAMS IN YIZHAN!!!!!!!!!!*
> 
> 1\. WOW. JUST. WOW. 😅😅😅 Y'all really went bat shit crazy, huh? 😂😂😂 Love everyone's reactions and comments!!!! Made my day! Especially all the first time commenters who I guess were riled up enough by this chapter to finally leave a comment hahahahaha!!
> 
> 2\. And just to clarify, there’s no hate on Chu Yue from my side. I just used him for my plot. As I've said before, he's my second favorite X-Nine member. Also, shoutout to the person who commented that they were now wondering about the ChuYue-ZhanZhan ship! 😂😂😂
> 
> 3\. To those who love angst and have been requesting it for a while (lol), I hope you’ve been enjoying my writing and that I’m living up to the promise I made at the end of chapter 109! Writing this angst phase is really sucking the life and emotions out of me! I've been re-reading my fluff chapters just to feel better haha but it’s worth it with all the comments and opinions!!
> 
> Okay, back to reading! Enjoy!!

* * *

Zhan was shaking, overwhelmed by the situation at hand, and his mind was racing. He jerked his face to one side and placed both his hands on Chu Yue’s chest, attempting to push him away. Chu Yue held him tighter but Zhan resisted.

”Sto…,” Zhan began, his voice quivering, but before he could get the entire word out of his mouth, another louder, harsher, angrier voice thundered.

”Get the fuck away from him!!”

Both Zhan and Chu Yue startled and turned in the direction of the voice simultaneously. Zhan felt his vision blur because of the tears that flooded his eyes and he saw the outline of a raging figure make its way towards them. Before Zhan could make anything out clearly, he felt the figure grab his wrist and yank him away from Chu Yue, planting him behind itself. 

”How dare you?!” The voice growled and Zhan thought he saw two hands grab Chu Yue by the collar.

Zhan wiped his eyes and blinked repeatedly. His vision finally cleared just in time to see Wang Yibo raise his fist in the air and bring it down hard onto Chu Yue’s chin. Zhan gasped and covered his mouth as Chu Yue keeled over but straightened him up again and came for Yibo. Chu Yue grabbed Yibo’s shirt and Zhan could see blood dripping from his mouth.

”What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Chu Yue shouted at Yibo while shaking him violently and then pushed him aside, moving him away from Zhan. “Zhan-Zhan...come with me…,” Chu Yue pleaded, “I can make you happier…”

”You….,” Yibo growled again and came at Chu Yue angrily.

He pushed him back and crashed him against the wall, pressing his arm against his throat.

”Shut your filthy mouth!” Yibo yelled. “Or I’m going to…”

”You’re going to what? Hit me more?” Chu Yue grunted and tussled with Yibo, pushing him off of him.

He wiped the blood and covered the distance between him and Yibo. Before Yibo knew what was happening, he felt a fist make contact with his stomach. He let out a pained groan and clutched his stomach.

”Yibo!!” Zhan finally snapped out of his shock and rushed forward to Yibo.

But before he could do anything, Yibo’s hands flew at Chu Yue, one grabbing his collar and other punching his nose. With a scream, Chu Yue fell down and Yibo pinned him to the floor, kneeling beside him, livid with rage. Zhan watched in horror as the scene descended into further chaos.

”Xiao Zhan is _my_ boyfriend! We are in a committed relationship!! How dare you fucking lay a finger on him!? And against his fucking will??” 

”What committed relationship are you talking about?!” Chu Yue spat out even as Yibo held him down. “He’s miserable! Or have you not noticed? He hasn't slept for days….or could you not tell? He is obviously heartbroken and hurt….you must have made him this way!! He’s not the happy Zhan-Zhan I know and love!”

For a brief second, Yibo froze but then pinned Chu Yue down harder, pressing into his chest with his knee.

”That is between Zhan-ge and me. How fucking dare you come between us?” Yibo exclaimed, infuriated. “How dare you try to take advantage of him? Did YOU not notice him trying to reject you AGAIN...trying to push you away...he didn't want to be kissed by you!!”

Chu Yue couldn't argue with that. He looked away and let his head fall back against the floor and stared at the ceiling, finally giving up, tired and at a loss for words.

”Yibo,” Zhan spoke hastily as he walked to the enraged boy and placed a hand on his shaking shoulder.

Zhan knelt beside Yibo and his hand slid down from Yibo’s shoulder to his elbow.

”Hey,” Zhan spoke in as soothing a voice as he could muster and turned him around. “Look at me,” Zhan tried to remain calm despite his racing heart. “I’m okay...I’m fine...please don't fight.”

Yibo finally looked up and saw Zhan’s pleading eyes. There was pain and fear in them and something else, something like desperation. He felt his body shudder as Zhan moved his hand down to Yibo’s hand and held it gently.

Yibo,” Zhan whispered, “Let’s go home.”

Yibo nodded and clutched Zhan’s hand desperately. His head stopped spinning and he grounded himself in Zhan’s touch. He shut his eyes and clenched his jaw in an attempt to control his seething anger.

”Come on, sweetie,” Zhan began standing up and held onto Yibo’s hand firmly.

Meekly, Yibo stood up and tightened his grip around Zhan’s hand as if, any moment, Zhan would disappear. He took in a deep breath and finally looked at Zhan again. 

”Let’s...let’s go home,” Zhan nodded shakily and intertwined their fingers.

Without even sparing another look at Chu Yue, Zhan led Yibo out of the room. They made their way to the elevator in silence. Once outside, Yibo walked them to his bike and unlatched the spare helmet he brought along from the bike.

He placed it on Zhan’s head quietly and secured it in place. He proceeded to put his own helmet on but his hands began shaking. Zhan reached out and helped him buckle the strap and lock it in place. 

When Yibo got on the bike, he waited as Zhan climbed on behind him. With another long, deep breath, he kicked the bike to life but didn't trust himself enough to ride the way he normally would. They made their way to their apartment slowly, riding through the empty roads and the dead silence of the night. 

Zhan’s eyes never left Yibo the whole way home. He had never seen Yibo that angry. He was almost like a feral animal but at the same time had looked vulnerable and scared. 

Zhan himself had been overwhelmed with every emotion imaginable. Shock when Chu Yue had tried to kiss him. Fear that Yibo would misunderstand the scene he had walked in on. Shame that he had found himself in such a situation. Worry that things would go too far again. Joy when he had heard Yibo tell Chu Yue that they were still in a committed relationship. Sadness when he walked out knowing that he would never look at his old friend the same way again. Anger that things had spiraled out of control. But most of all, intense relief that Yibo had come back.

When they reached their building, the walk to the apartment was still filled with a heavy silence. When they entered the house, Yibo turned away to head to the bathroom but Zhan stopped him by the arm.

”I’m sorry I let it go too far, didi.” Zhan apologized not knowing if it was for their fight or if it was for what happened with Chu Yue or both.

”Are you not happy with me any more, Zhan-ge?” Yibo spoke in a low voice, slowly turning around.

”Wha…”

”Are you not happy with me any more? Do you want to break up?”


	187. Completely out of control

* * *

”Are you not happy with me any more? Do you want to break up?”

Zhan froze and stared at a furious and broken Yibo.

Of course not Yibo!” Zhan’s eyes widened.

Yibo’s shoulders relaxed the slightest bit and his lips trembled.

”Yibo...I am happy...very happy with you!” Zhan exclaimed in shock. “Why would you even ask me that?”

”Then why did he say that? Why did that bastard say you were miserable?” Tears formed in Yibo’s eyes.

”He was exaggerating! I never said I was miserable.” Zhan looked at Yibo desperately. 

He took a step closer to Yibo, hands reaching out for the boy.

”You know exactly how things have been between us,” Zhan continued as he held Yibo’s hand. “The fights. The last two weeks.” His voice dropped but he held Yibo’s hands tighter. “But I have never felt miserable or unhappy with you, Yibo. I was miserable because of myself. Because of what I did to you.”

Yibo shook his head and began turning away again.

Hey...hey,” Zhan held Yibo’s face firmly, “...look at me...I love you. I meant it when I said I love you no matter what. My love for you is unconditional. Even when we fight like we have been. We will get past this. We will figure it out. I will never give up on us.”

Yibo took a long look at Zhan. Before he knew what he was doing, he grabbed Zhan by the waist and pulled him into a rough kiss. He attacked Zhan with his lips, tongue, teeth. He nipped and licked at the plump lips, mouthing him all over, sloppy and harsh at the same time. 

Zhan let out a surprised gasp as Yibo’s fingers clutched his waist harder. He wrapped his arms around his neck and closed the gap, pressing his body against Yibo, desperately seeking the closeness he had missed. 

”Wang Yibo...” Zhan sighed. “Bo-di…I missed you….” he repeated again and again.

”You’re mine,” Yibo growled as he bit down on Zhan’s lower lip, eliciting a moan. “Do you understand that?”

”Ahh,” Zhan winced at the mixed feeling of pleasure and pain, “Yes...”

”Say you’re mine…,” Yibo bit and sucked his way down Zhan’s neck.

”I’m...ahh…,” Zhan hissed as Yibo bit down on his skin, “I’m yours, didi.”

”No one else can fucking touch you...fuck that...no one else can fucking come close to you!” Yibo grabbed Zhan by the neck and looked him in the eye. “No one but me.”

”Yibo…,” Zhan felt aroused by Yibo’s possessiveness, “I...ahhh,” he groaned when Yibo pulled his head back harder by the hair and sucked on his throat that was bobbing up and down as he swallowed the pain, “yes...yes...no one but you.”

Yibo pushed Zhan against the door and pressed his body against his, rolling his hip against his, plastering his lips against his. Zhan moaned again and again as Yibo kept grinding against him ruthlessly, sparing not even a second of relief to catch his breath.

”Do you know how crazy I felt, ge…,” Yibo pulled back and held Zhan’s face by the chin, “...how totally completely out of control I was when I saw that asshole come near you….when I saw him try to…,” 

Yibo’s eyes darkened as he looked at Zhan - lips wet, red and ravaged, face flushed and ravished, neck spotted with bruises. 

“I wanted to murder him.” Yibo spoke in a low, angry voice.

They stared at each other, the tension growing. Yibo could feel Zhan’s hot and heavy breath on his skin. Their lips lingered dangerously close but neither moved.

”Yibo…,” Zhan whispered in a soft voice and closed his eyes.

Yibo lost all self restraint after that and crashed their lips together. His hands groped every inch of Zhan’s body. Zhan pulled him closer, latching onto his ass, and rolled his hips against him. Yibo groaned into Zhan’s mouth and grabbed him by the collar.

They began walking further inside the apartment as he unbuttoned Zhan’s shirt impatiently. Unable to hold back any longer, Yibo ripped the shirt open with a grunt, sending buttons flying in all directions. Zhan gasped as Yibo yanked the shirt off him and parted their lips long enough to take his own shirt off. They stuck to each other once more as they made their way into the bedroom, mouths wet and hungry.

They clung to each other’s sweaty bodies, their bare skins sticking together. Their moans grew louder as they devoured each other. Zhan’s fingers dug into Yibo’s back, wanting more, craving more, begging for more as Yibo continued grinding against him.

They pulled back abruptly, gasping for air, breaths heavy, and clambered for each other’s pants, pulling them off hurriedly as they found the bed. Frantically, they assaulted each other’s lips again, kissing wildly and messily. 

Yibo grabbed Zhan and threw him on the bed, pulling the lube out of the nightstand. He followed Zhan onto the bed and soon they were a tangle of lips and limbs, lost in each other’s writhing bodies.

”Bo-di…,” Zhan breathed.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo panted as he began opening him. “Zhan-ge…”

”Didi…”

”I missed you, ge...fuck...I missed you,” Yibo sighed as he scissored Zhan.

When he was satisfied with Zhan’s stretch, he wasted no time in getting on top of Zhan. Zhan pulled his knees closer to his chest, willingly spreading his legs, and pulled Yibo closer, sealing their lips together. 

Yibo lined himself with Zhan’s opening and began entering him. Both groaned together as Yibo slowly bottomed out. Within seconds, Yibo began moving quickly as pleasure filled them both after weeks of longing and thirst. 

”Fuck...ge...you feel so good,” Yibo panted as he rammed into Zhan.

”Didi…,” Zhan threw his head back and moaned. “Fuck...more…”

Yibo thrust into Zhan mercilessly over and over and over again. Zhan’s voice filled the room as he begged Yibo for more. Their bodies moved together in a fast-paced rhythm as they let out weeks and weeks of want. Their bodies expressed everything they had not. 

As they lost themselves in each other, Yibo pounded into Zhan at a feverish speed. They clutched onto each other as their bodies were filled with heat and pleasure. Their moans resonated, their lips slotted together, their breaths blended into one hot heavy mess.

As their voices crescendoed, their bodies climaxed. 

”Bo-di...I’m…,” Zhan exclaimed and dug into Yibo’s back harder, “...fuck…aahh…!”

Zhan groaned as he came hard and fast with just Yibo’s fiery passion. Seconds later, Yibo followed him with a loud moan. He filled Zhan up until he was spilling over. Zhan threw his head back and let out a long deep breath as their bodies went limp. Yibo fell on top of him, resting his forehead in the crook of Zhan’s neck.

”Zhan-ge...fuck…,” Yibo panted, sweat dripping down his face.

For several minutes, they lay together, melting into each other as their bodies enveloped each other. Zhan ran his hand down Yibo’s back, caressing his damp skin. Yibo raised his head enough to come face to face with Zhan. 

They gazed into each other’s eyes, letting the moment sink in, letting their pleasure simmer down, letting their hearts calm down.

Yibo looked at Zhan and brushed his messy hair away from his sweaty forehead. He kissed the damp skin and sighed. Zhan held his cheek and pulled him into a gentle kiss.

”I love you, ge…,” Yibo whispered.

Zhan felt warm tears slide down his face on hearing Yibo finally, finally, finally say the words he had been starved for for so long.

”I love you too, didi...I love you so much.”


	188. Are we okay?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the lovely comments on the previous chapter! There was a lot of pressure writing that one, especially the smut because it was a much anticipated reunion and make-up!

* * *

Yibo wiped Zhan’s tears and placed soft kisses on his eyelids.

”Bo-di,” Zhan spoke softly. “I’m sorry.”

For a brief moment, both stared into each other’s eyes with vulnerable tenderness.

”I promise you, didi...I am not unhappy with you. Not even close. Even though we’ve been fighting, not once has the thought crossed my mind to break up. I thought _you_ were going to break up with _me_.”

__

”I would never dream of it…Zhan-ge...I can’t imagine...,” Yibo began but Zhan placed his finger on Yibo’s lips.

__

”I can't imagine my life without you either.” Zhan whispered.

__

”Are you...are you sure?”

__

”Of course I am,” Zhan pulled Yibo closer and rested his forehead against his. “You are my Wang Yibo. My baby lion. My puppy. My everything. I can't imagine myself with anyone but you.”

__

”I can't imagine myself with anyone but you too, ge,” Yibo began sobbing and hid his face in the curve of Zhan’s neck. 

__

Zhan felt hot tears slide down his neck and wet his shoulder. His heart broke as he felt Yibo crumble against him, his sobs growing louder.

__

_How did we get here? What have we been fighting about? Time? Work? They’re all external factors. Our feelings haven't changed. Our love hasn't changed. Our bond hasn't changed. We just don't have time. I don't have time. I don't make time. I’ve overbooked myself. I’m overworking myself. How could I let this happen?!_

__

”Sometimes...,” Yibo gathered himself together enough to say a few words, “... sometimes I feel like you’ve forgotten me, ge.”

__

Zhan froze as he heard the unexpected words. He pulled Yibo away from him and stared intently into his eyes. A heartbroken expression flooded his face when he saw how lost and scared Yibo looked.

__

_I did this to him. I made him feel this way. I once promised myself I’d do anything to make him happy for the rest of his life. And look where I’ve left him now._

__

”Wang Yibo,” Zhan whispered as his tears came gushing out. “Wang Yibo…”

__

Zhan could find no words. He crashed his lips onto Yibo’s and enveloped them, desperate and ardent. He deepened the kiss, pouring all his emotions into it, hoping his lips could express what his words could not.

__

After several seconds, he pulled back and held Yibo’s face in his hands.

__

”I’m sorry...I’m so sorry...I’m so sorry...can you forgive me...I failed...I’m sorry,” Zhan wept. “I never meant to hurt you like this...I’m so sorry...please...forgive me…”

__

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo exclaimed in alarm, sitting up as Zhan fell apart. 

__

He helped Zhan up until they were sitting face to face.

__

“Please...don't say sorry...there’s nothing to forgive...I’m sorry...I’m getting too emotional...I went overboard...I shouldn't have cut you out...I shouldn't have shut myself off like that...please Zhan-ge…”

__

”You’re not going overboard, didi...I went overboard...with my work...and my time...but I hope you know,” Zhan sobbed harder, “I could never...I never even once...forgot you. You were always on my mind even when it may have seemed like you weren’t…”

__

”I know that, ge...I know that,” Yibo pulled Zhan into a hug and massaged his back. “I’m sorry, ge...it’s not your fault...I don't blame you for anything...I should have understood...this is your career...you’ve worked so hard to get where you are...I’ve seen it...I know what you’ve been through...I’m so stupid...how can I be so selfish...if it was the other way around, I know you would have understood and supported me...don't cry, ge...it’s okay...it’s okay…”

__

”No...don't apologize...I need to be a better boyfriend,” Zhan sighed and began calming down.

__

”Me too, ge...me too,” Yibo took in a deep breath.

__

”Are we okay?” Zhan sniffled. “Are you...can you forgive me...can you really move past this?”

__

”Shh,” Yibo placed kisses on Zhan’s shoulder. “There’s nothing to move past...nothing to forgive...we are okay...we will always be okay...I promise.”

__

”Don't ever scare me like that,” Zhan began sobbing once again against Yibo’s chest. “Don't ever walk away from us...don't ever talk about breaking up...not even a break. You gave me a panic attack...I don't know what I would have done...”

__

”What?” Yibo pulled Zhan away from his chest and looked at him, concern written all over his face. “You had a panic attack??”

__

”I...no...I just,” Zhan cursed himself inwardly for accidentally slipping up, “No...it wasn't bad...I was just upset…”

__

”Ge? Did you...oh my god...I’m so stupid! I should never have left…”

__

”But you came back…”

__

”Of course I did...I was just angry but a few minutes later as I was riding away, I regretted everything I said and immediately came back...I’m so sorry, ge...I can't believe I left you alone...and made you have a panic attack,” Yibo pulled Zhan into a tight embrace. “I’m sorry...”

__

”No, it was me...I lost my cool...I walked away first...I said stupid things too...you are supportive...you do understand...and you were right...I need to find a balance…”

__

”I’m sorry, ge,” Yibo tightened his arms around Zhan protectively. “I’m so so sorry…”

__

”Why are you apologizing...I’m apologizing…”

__

”No, I’m apologizing…”

__

”No, me…”

__

”No, me…,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s cheek.

__

”No, me…,” Zhan sniffled and wiped his tears, letting Yibo rock him gently.

__

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s forehead.

__

”Bo-di,” Zhan managed a small smile and pulled away enough to gaze at Yibo.

__

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo’s voice grew softer as he gazed into Zhan’s red swollen eyes.

__

”Bo-di…,” Zhan whispered as he wiped the tears from Yibo’s puffy eyes.

__

”I love you,” they both said simultaneously, prompting them both to smile wider.

__

Yibo rubbed his nose against Zhan’s and held his wrist, lifting his hand to his lips.

__

”Oww,” Zhan massaged his wrist that was now mildly red.

__

”What happened, ge?” Yibo held the delicate wrist and looked at it worriedly.

__

”You twisted my wrist when you yanked me away,” Zhan winced as Yibo probed the redness.

__

”Oh,” Yibo paused from what he was doing and Zhan could see him grit his teeth. “I...I’m sorry,” Yibo took a deep breath and placed a kiss on the bruise.

__

”It’s okay,” Zhan lifted his face up by the chin. “I would have done the same.”

__

”I felt my blood boil, ge...I’ve never felt that much rage before.”

__

”It’s okay, sweetie…,” Zhan caressed his cheek, “let’s move on from this...let’s put it behind us and focus on mending what’s broken...I need to improve…”

__

”No, ge...I’m the one who needs to be more understanding…”

__

”But I need to be better at balancing my career and personal life…”

__

”That’s true,” Yibo smirked, “when we have kids, you’re going to have to actually be around.”

__

”Bo-di!” Zhan blushed furiously as Yibo’s smirk grew wider.

__

”What happened, ge? Why are you blushing?” 

__

”I am not blushing,” Zhan pushed Yibo and got off the bed to go clean up.

__

Yibo followed Zhan and turned him around by the arm and sealed their lips together. He wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and smiled against his lips as he felt Zhan melt into his arms. 

__

”I’m sorry, ge,” Yibo planted soft kisses all over Zhan’s face. “I was miserable with myself too and I thought about you all the time. I will never cut you out like this ever again.”

__

”And I won't walk away from you ever again.”

__

”Even if you do,” Yibo murmured softly, “I will follow you wherever you go.”

__


	189. So what have we learnt from this fight?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a filler chapter but with this chapter, my angst phase comes to an end for now. Boy was this exhausting to write. Drained me a LOT. But the finished chapters were worth it I think.

* * *

”I love you, didi…I love you so much.”

”I love you more, ge…so much more…”

”Not possible,” Zhan pulled away and gave Yibo a smirk.

”I’m sorry I ruined your birthday…”

”You didn't ruin my birthday...you’ve given me the best gift by talking to me and sorting this out.”

Yibo hugged Zhan and let out a long sigh. They stayed in each other’s embrace for several minutes until Zhan broke the comfortable silence.

”I think we should clean up,” Zhan whispered as Yibo held him close.

”Hmm,” Yibo hummed.

”And you need to sleep...you just landed today and came straight to the party…”

”Hmm…”

Zhan chuckled and walked with Yibo, backwards, towards the bathroom. Yibo clung to Zhan as they made their way inside. Even when Zhan leaned forward to turn the water on, he didn't let go. 

”Puppy,” Zhan smiled and kissed Yibo’s cheek. “I missed you so much...I missed holding you...I missed everything about you,” he peppered Yibo’s face with kisses.

”Mmm,” Yibo smiled, basking in the affection.

”Come here,” Zhan led him under the pleasantly warm water.

He lathered some shampoo and massaged it into Yibo’s hair. Yibos sighed as Zhan caressed him gently and washed the shampoo off. Zhan soaped Yibo’s entire body from head to toe, worshipping every inch.

Once he was done, Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and hugged him, letting the shower wash him off. Zhan took in a long inhale, revelling in the scent of Yibo, letting it surround him and overwhelm him.

Yibo took the shampoo and applied a generous amount on Zhan and smiled as Zhan sighed into his touch. He kissed both Zhan’s cheeks as he massaged him and then washed it off carefully. As he was soaping Zhan’s back, Zhan plastered his body against Yibo, mouthing at his neck playfully.

As Yibo washed the soap off Zhan, Zhan couldn't help but yawn. Several times.

”You haven't slept properly this entire time, have you?”

”I…,” Zhan bit his lips even as his eyes averted Yibo’s gaze.

”Don't even try to lie...that wasn't really a question…,” Yibo feigned a frown.

”I’ll sleep really well tonight, though,” Zhan smiled at Yibo and wrapped his arms around his neck.

After they were done showering, they dried off and got into bed. Zhan spread his arms wide and Yibo snuggled against him. They slotted together like the perfect puzzle. With a long sigh, they melted into each other’s arms and held on tightly.

”I’m glad this is over,” Yibo whispered. “I hated feeling like that.”

”Me too...hated every minute of it.” Zhan’s face dropped as he relived the pain.

”I’m just happy to move past this.”

”So,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s forehead, “what have we learnt from this fight?”

”That make-up sex is amazing,” Yibo raised his head to look at Zhan and smirked.

”Bo-di!” Zhan rolled his eyes.

”That I shouldn’t shut off when I’m upset or I’ll blow up all at once at some point,” Yibo looked at Zhan sheepishly.

”And that this may not be our last fight...we’re bound to have more fights but they don't have to be bad fights...they can make us stronger...if we just communicate.”

”But I don't want to fight again,” Yibo pouted.

”Neither do I,” Zhan chuckled and kissed Yibo’s nose. “But…”

”But what?”

”Didi,” Zhan pulled away from Yibo and rolled onto his side, propping his head up on his arm. “I know I need to balance my life better...but…”

Zhan bit his lips as fear took over him once again. Images of an angry, hurt, broken Yibo flooded through his mind.

”...but I can't do anything about my schedule for the next few months. I’ve already made commitments till December...and I wish I could change that….I really do but…”

”It’s okay, ge,” Yibo placed a hand on Zhan’s cheek. “I know...I’m not going to ask you to just cancel things…”

”I know but I just need you to know that the next 3 months are not going to be any different from what my schedule has been like so far.”

”I promise we’ll be fine...now that we know what the other feels...we’ll handle it better…”

”I’ll make more effort to be there and I promise that after December, I will strike a better balance…”

”Good...your health is more important…”

”You are more important.”

Yibo leaned in and enveloped Zhan’s lips. Zhan placed a hand behind Yibo’s head and pulled him closer. Zhan deepened the kiss and Yibo moaned as Zhan’s tongue explored him.

When they pulled apart, their lips shiny and breaths warm, Zhan brushed aside strands of hair from Yibo’s face and tucked them back.

”Didi…,” Zhan murmured as Yibo smiled in satisfaction.

”Hmm?”

”Will you move back in with me?”

Yibo froze. He stared at Zhan as if he had grown two heads.

”Wha..what?” Yibo held his breath.

”Will you move back in with me? Come back home.”

Yibo remained silent but Zhan could see his eyes turning red.

”This apartment will never feel like a home without you, Wang Yibo.”

”But…,” Yibo finally found his voice, “but what about the fans that might see me…”

”We’ll make sure they don’t...we’ll figure it out...I'll get more security here...we'll be more discreet...whatever it takes...I’m not going to make you stay at your old apartment any longer.”

Yibo’s lips trembled and his eyes reddened more. Zhan could see the tears that they held, waiting to be let out.

”Didi…? Answer me…,” Zhan smiled affectionately and caressed Yibo’s cheek.

”Yes!!” Yibo leapt at Zhan causing him to fall back on the bed.

Zhan chuckled as Yibo wrapped himself around him like a koala baby. `

”Yes!” Yibo’s muffled voice repeated as his face buried itself in Zhan’s chest.

”Good…,” Zhan sighed. “Good.”

 _I’m never going to let anything get in the way of his happiness ever again._ Zhan held onto Yibo protectively. _I will do everything I can to keep him happy, safe, and secure. His happiness is my happiness._

__

Zhan adjusted their bodies to a more comfortable position when he heard Yibo’s gentle, steady breathing. He turned him onto his back and tucked him in with the soft blanket. He gazed at the sleeping face and his heart hurt as he thought of what he must have put Yibo through for him to pull away the way he had.

__

He lay back beside Yibo with a deep exhale and placed both hands under his head as he stared at the ceiling. His mind was fixated on one thought and one thought alone and Zhan was determined to see it through the next day. 

__

He glanced at Yibo who was sound asleep, now on his side, facing Zhan. Zhan turned onto his side as well and gazed at him, happy and content. With the singular thought in his mind and heart, Zhan drifted off into his first night of peaceful slumber after over a week.

__


	190. Do you still remember that summer?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Definitely read the end notes for this chapter! Some juicy information there this time!

* * *

When Yibo woke up the next morning, the space beside him was empty. He rubbed his eyes and yawned as he looked around the room but there was no one. He reached for his phone and was surprised when he found a note tucked under it.

_Good morning, sweetie. Had an important errand to run before today’s work. Sorry, I didn't want to wake you. You were sleeping so soundly. Looking so cute! I’ve made breakfast for you, make sure you eat all of it! I love you, didi. Always._

Yibo smiled at the little cartoon doodles of a baby lion face and a bunny face and couldn't help but chuckle at hearts drawn all around them. He stretched and lay back on the bed for a few more minutes.

 _Somehow, I’m not feeling annoyed by this._ Yibo thought in wonder. _I feel lighter and more at peace than I have in a while. I know now...that Zhan-ge hasn't forgotten me. I’m not less important to him just because he is focusing on his career right now. I know now how much he thinks about me even when he is busy. I know how much he wants to do for more even when he has no time._

Yibo picked his phone up and began texting Zhan.

> _Yibo: Good morning, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: Did you finally sleep properly?  
>    
>  _

Yibo got out of the bed to freshen up and put his phone aside. He glanced at the note once more and smiled widely. He rummaged through his clothes and sighed happily as he looked around the room.

_I’m back home!_

* * *

It was 9 am when Zhan returned to his car after completing his errand. He yawned repeatedly but was satisfied and content with his morning task. As he made his way to the shoot, he pulled his phone out to text Yibo.

> _Zhan: Good morning, sweetie  
>    
>  Zhan: I slept really well...felt so nice having you by my side again _😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Also, be careful when you leave home today  
>    
>  Zhan: There were 10 or so fans outside when I left  
>    
>  Zhan: And that was at 6 am!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: What the fuck? Insane.  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’ll be careful_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: So what’s your schedule like...for the next few weeks?  
>    
>  Zhan: Oath of love this month and beginning of November…  
>    
>  Zhan: We’ll continue the shooting for Our song in two weeks  
>    
>  Zhan: They’ve been so accommodating to my schedule  
>    
>  Zhan: Oh, and I have the autumn gala in less than two weeks too  
>    
>  Zhan: And of course the usual photoshoots, interviews, events…  
>    
>  Zhan: Sorry, didi  
>    
>  Bo-di: Stop apologizing, ge! I don't want you to feel guilty anymore  
>    
>  Bo-di: I love you...I’m on board with everything this time  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m better prepared for the good, the bad, and the ugly  
>    
>  Bo-di: I want it all with you  
>    
>  Zhan: So cheesy, didi _😋 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Only for you, ge_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan: _ 😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan: But thanks, I feel much lighter knowing you’re on board  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m always on your side  
>    
>  Zhan: Me too...always  
>    
>  Zhan: What’s your schedule like?  
>    
>  Bo-di: I have Legend of fei stuff in the shooting studio here over the course of the month  
>    
>  Bo-di: So relieved I don't have to travel between TTXS and Legend of fei_ 😪 _  
>   
>  Zhan: That’s good, didi...good for me too _😉 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Okay...just reached the Oath of love studio...gotta go  
>    
>  Zhan: I’ll be home around 11 tonight  
>    
>  Zhan: Pleeaaassee don't wait for me to come home to have dinner  
>    
>  Zhan: You know what happens to your stomach  
>    
>  Bo-di: How about I eat a little before you come and the remaining with you  
>    
>  Bo-di: Deal?  
>    
>  Zhan: Deal_ 😘 _  
>   
>  _

* * *

When Zhan came home that night, Yibo was on the floor rug near the couch. He seemed engrossed in something and didn't realize when Zhan entered the apartment. Zhan raised an eyebrow at the lack of reaction and, not wanting to distract the boy, made his way to him as silently as possible.

When he got to the couch, he saw legos spread all over the rug in neat piles and a very focused and oblivious Yibo hunched over them, hands moving smoothly and quickly, with his tongue sticking out.

Zhan stood behind the couch, admiring the view. 

_It feels so good to come back home to him. This right here is everything I want._ Zhan sighed happily.

”Zhan-ge?” Yibo looked up on hearing the sigh.

”Hey…,” Zhan walked over and sat on the couch, ruffling Yibo’s hair on his way.

”Hi…,” Yibo smiled and crawled onto Zhan’s lap with his knees on either side of him.

Yibo leaned forward as Zhan rested against the back of the couch and covered the distance between them. Zhan smiled back and pulled him closer, hand at the back of his neck. They gazed into each other’s eyes and Zhan kissed Yibo’s nose.

Yibo giggled as Zhan planted more kisses all over his face before sealing their lips together. When they pulled apart, Zhan brushed a strand of hair away from Yibo’s eyes.

”Did you eat?”

”Hmm...a little…”

”Good boy,” Zhan pinched Yibo’s nose.

”Now you be a good boy and come eat dinner with me…you must be tired...you look drained.”

”Hmm...a little...by the way, I picked a song for the autumn gala...wanna hear? It’s for you.” Zhan grinned.

Yibo’s eyes lit up and he straightened himself and nodded eagerly. Zhan smiled and caressed Yibo’s cheek before he began humming a tune familiar to Yibo.

_Do you still remember that summer?  
The beach that was lined with coconut trees  
The rays of sunlight piercing our eyes  
You kissed my face softly  
A plane glides across the sea surface  
Leaving a trail of smiles  
In that moment between you and I  
There exists a century of separation  
But the fleeting time can't take away the images in my memory_

Zhan pulled Yibo closer and kissed him gently on the lips before singing again.

_You are the most beautiful scenery in this lifetime  
I am heartbroken yet enchanted  
Even if the world rocks full of despair  
I will have the courage to smile  
You are the most beautiful scenery in this lifetime  
To make me think of you always  
To have loved someone like this, is such a blessing_

When Zhan was done, Yibo had tears in his eyes. His cheeks were damp and his nose had turned red. 

”You really are the most beautiful thing in my life, didi,” Zhan smiled at the sniffling boy lovingly.

”Even when I’m a crying mess?” Yibo snorted and wiped his cheeks.

”Especially when you’re a crying mess,” Zhan chuckled and hugged Yibo.

”I’m so glad you’re back home,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s shoulder. “This is where you belong. With me.”

”Hmm.” Yibo hugged Zhan tighter.

With a long exhale, Yibo sat up again and got off Zhan’s lap. He dragged him up by his hands and led him to the dining table.

”Sit,” he ordered Zhan and then proceeded to bring food out from the kitchen.

Zhan rubbed his growling stomach and eyed the food hungrily. When Yibo set their plates, he dove in enthusiastically, much to Yibo’s amusement.

”Did you make this!?” Zhan asked in between mouthfuls.

”What do you think?” Yibo grinned. “I ordered of course.”

Zhan nodded and continued eating. When they were done, they cleaned the dishes together, one washing the other drying. Zhan rehearsed the song he had chosen for his performance and Yibo hummed along as they stood shoulder to shoulder, arm to arm, hip to hip. 

”What about the songs for Our song?” Yibo asked when Zhan had finished rehearsing the song three more times. “Did you pick those too?”

”Not all,” Zhan dried his hands as he finished washing the last dish. “But I know which one I definitely want to sing!”

”Which one?” 

”Summer breeze by J. J. Lin!!”

Zhan smiled excitedly and began singing the song.

_Remembering it like it was yesterday, that summer  
The instance the breeze blew past  
It seemed to toss everything into disarray  
Leaving only the silence to settle and stay  
Until today, the breeze is still blowing  
The summer rain follows in its way  
But the heat within the heart remains  
It seemed that if my eyes remain closed  
I’ll see that familiar face again  
My blue yearning suddenly transformed into a bright summer day  
The warmth in the air isn't far away  
It seems like the winter isn't wistful anymore  
My green yearning looked at me and said seasons don't change  
In the span of a season, it has travelled back to the summer wind that blew past _

”You know,” Yibo began when Zhan was done, “if you keep singing about summer love, our fans are going to catch onto us. You’ve already done this thrice….last year it was the 'best summer' song and now these two...” 

__

”That’s the whole point,” Zhan grinned.

__

”What?” Yibo looked confused. 

__

”Didi,” Zhan held Yibo’s hands and drew him closer. “If we can't acknowledge our relationship in public, the very least I can do is let our love show in these small ways...so that it can exist in the hearts of the people that love and support us.”

__

Yibo smiled and shook his head. He kissed the back of Zhan’s hand and intertwined their fingers.

__

”You’re crazy…”

__

”Crazy about you…," Zhan placed a hand on Yibo’s cheek. "I just want the people that love us to know how much we love each other...how much I love you."

__

”I love you more,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s palm.

__

”Not possible,” Zhan whispered before sealing their lips together.

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XZ’s autumn gala performance -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpKNWlwkZW8
> 
> Apparently XZ really wanted to sing the song Summer Breeze but didn't get a chance to in that particular episode of Our Song since they came first and didn't need to perform a second song. Na Ying kept saying that he loves the song. In fact, they did perform the song finally, in a later episode.
> 
> Video clip of XZ singing a small bit of the song on Na Ying and the audience’s insistence -  
> https://twitter.com/wenwen11113/status/1203897647909629952?lang=en
> 
> XZ and Na Ying’s rendition of the whole song with english translation -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IbXyIXZYe3M
> 
> Here’s the juicy part -
> 
> I came across a video (an audio clip that was taken by a fan during the shooting of that Our Song episode but was not included in the final episode cut) in which the host is asking XZ why he loves the song so much and was so persistent on singing it. 
> 
> XZ’s reply - ‘I feel the song describes a scene that is very wonderful. That is during the time of adolescence and awakening, the seeds of love begin to sprout. And then during a windblown summer, a relationship develops. I just really wanted to sing this for everyone to hear.’  
> (at this point all the fangirls begin getting excited!)
> 
> Na Ying’s response: ‘You’ve revealed everything!’
> 
> The said video -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wHRr3AdScic&feature=youtu.be  
> (the fact that they cut this segment out of the episode, makes my bjyxszd senses tingle!!!)
> 
> And finally, the other XZ summer related song - The best summer  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TYBt2S_MUZQ 
> 
> Lastly, the Kadian guide -  
> https://www.yellowbridge.com/chinese/pagercodes.php  
> (Kadian the practise in China of using numbers to depict words due to the similar pronunciation. So they’re kind of like acronyms and codes for common words and phrases. Apparently people use them as secret codes on Weibo and of course Yizhan shippers analyse the date and time that Yizhan post messages on Weibo to find secret messages in those numbers!)


	191. But where are we going?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short filler chapter only because I wanted to include these two small events/incidents in my story! For fun!

* * *

Zhan paced nervously backstage as he readied himself for his performance. In the last two weeks, he had been so busy that the only time he had to prepare for the autumn gala was in his breaks or when he travelled in the car. But that’s not what was making him nervous.

What was making him nervous was that any moment now, he would be seeing his idol, Stefanie Sun.

_What am I even going to say to her!? Oh god, please don't let me make a fool of myself!!_

As if on cue, he heard the door open and in walked none other than Stefanie Sun herself.

* * *

> _Zhan: Bo-di!!! I met her!!!! I actually met her!!!!!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Who?!  
>    
>  Zhan: STEFANIE SUN!!!! FUCK!!!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Wow! That’s awesome, ge! Did you get a pic with her?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yes! I’m just standing super awkwardly next to her  
>    
>  Zhan: And I didn’t know what to say so I kept bowing to her  
>    
>  Zhan: But most importantly….she replied to my Weibo post!!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Wow...that’s great….so happy for you, ge!  
>    
>  Bo-di: How was your performance?  
>    
>  Zhan: It went well...it was a little surreal...there were red signs for me everywhere...it was like an ocean of red. But guess what?  
>    
>  Bo-di: What?  
>    
>  Zhan: I saw some signs for us in that crowd!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Us?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yep! Bo Jun Yi Xiao  
>    
>  Zhan: And gg-dd-ai-ni  
>    
>  Zhan: I wonder where they got that from…_🤨 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Oh! _😋 _  
>   
>  Zhan: _😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan: I’m on my way home...see you soon  
>    
>  Bo-di: _😘 

* * *

Two days later, Yibo was in the studio shooting for the Legend of Fei. He was in between shots, scrolling through his phone while gliding around on his skateboard. As he scrolled through Weibo, he caught Zhan’s name in the trending section. 

When he saw why Zhan was trending, however, his curiosity turned to irritation and then anger. An actor had bad-mouthed Zhan in a Weibo post for no real rhyme or reason. The attack seemed random and was out of the blue.

_Who the fuck is this guy!? He’s never even worked with ge and is spouting nonsense about his talent and achievements. Such a scumbag trying to get attention because of Zhan-ge’s popularity!!!_

> _Yibo: Did you see it?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yeah...my studio informed me  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It’s no big deal, Bo-di  
>    
>  Yibo: No big deal?! He’s attacking your talent and reputation!  
>    
>  Yibo: What a fucking asshole!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Didi...it’s okay...calm down  
>    
>  Yibo: So you’re not going to do anything?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Would you? It’s better to just let these things pass away  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: You know that...I don't want to give him any attention  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: He doesn’t deserve it  
>    
>  Yibo: Fine...but if he keeps going…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Didi...don't do anything stupid  
>    
>  Yibo: Is this really not affecting you?  
>    
>  Yibo: And don't lie to me!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Okay...it does hurt...it took all my efforts to not respond to it in any way, directly or indirectly  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: But we have to rise above it  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Eventually it will pass  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It always does _

_Zhan-ge...Zhan-ge…_ Yibo frowned and shook his head. _Always the bigger person. But I’m not going to let him get away with this._

* * *

Zhan sighed and leaned back. He shut his eyes and let his mind rest for a bit as he made his way to run one last errand for the day before heading home. If he were to be completely honest, he was too excited to care about what one person thought of him. 

An hour later when he was finally done with the errand and on his way back home, he scrolled through Weibo to gauge the impact of the actor’s controversial post. It had dropped on the trending chart, much to his relief, and he was about to put his phone aside when he decided to login to his private account.

He used the account to keep in touch with his close friends and family, and indulge in some guilty pleasure such as following his and Yibo's cp fans and stalking Yibo. It was this indulgence that led Zhan to coming across Yibo’s post. What shocked him more was that the post was not on Yibo’s private account but on his public one.

”Bo-di!!” Zhan exclaimed as the car made its way home. “What did you do!?”

* * *

It was nearly midnight and Yibo was assembling his lego car in the bedroom when the front door flew open and in walked Zhan.

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan called out from the hall, as he toed out of his shoes hurriedly. “Come here right now!”

”Fuck,” Yibo muttered under his breath.

He walked out into the living room and sure enough, Zhan stood there, hands on his hips, tapping his foot impatiently. Yibo couldn't help but curl his lips inwards to suppress a smile.

_Why does he look so cute when he’s mad at me?_

”Don't smile at me,” Zhan frowned. “Why did you post that?”

”Post what?”

”Your last Weibo post,” Zhan’s frown deepened.

”It was just a post about my skateboard shoes and I posted it on Oasis,” Yibo shrugged and batted his eyes innocently.

”Don't act cute,” Zhan pointed a finger at Yibo and wiggled it furiously. “You know you selected the option to post it on Weibo too when you posted it on Oasis...you know exactly what I’m talking about. You never post such unedited, unfiltered, personal content on your public Weibo. It can't be just a coincidence that you posted that after my….issue.”

”But what do shoes have to do with your issue?” Yibo smirked.

”Yibo...you…,” Zhan grit his teeth. “It’s not the shoes but what’s written on them. SB….you were literally cursing at him. You think people who ship us won't notice the ‘coincidence’ of you posting something so random all of a sudden right after that man posted about me?”

”That’s the point,” Yibo grinned, mirroring Zhan’s words from a few weeks back.

”Huh?”

”Isn't that what you said? That we can still let our love exist and be known in the hearts of the people that love us and want us together?”

”Uhhh,” Zhan didn't know how to respond to that.

”Well...who do you think will be able to decode the significance of my post? Only those who know my feelings for you, only those that follow both our lives, and only those who read into our every interaction.”

”Didi…,” Zhan dragged a hand down his face.

”Relax,” Yibo walked over to where Zhan stood and took his hands in his. “It’s not too obvious. No one can prove anything.” He kissed Zhan’s hand. “You’re not the only one who can leave love clues about us,” Yibo winked.

”You’re crazy…,” Zhan laughed and shook his head.

”Crazy about you,” Yibo smirked.

”Now come on. We need to go somewhere…,” Zhan held Yibo’s hand and led him to the door.

”At this time? Together?” Yibo’s eyes widened as Zhan handed him a jacket.

”Yes...I’ve booked a different car than my usual one just to be safe. And there weren’t any fans outside when I got home today.”

”But where are we going?!” Yibo asked, bewildered.

”It’s a surprise.” Zhan smiled and placed a light kiss on Yibo’s cheek, pinching it lovingly before taking his hand and leading him out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XZ being a Sun Yanzi fangirl -  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhan_/status/1185606510396592128  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1198984639571873794  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1198607880351444994
> 
> XZ Autumn gala performance -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpKNWlwkZW8  
> (There may not be proof of any bjyx signs at the autumn gala event but there’s enough proof of both bjyx and dd-ai-ni signs at other events!)
> 
> Actor insulting XZ -  
> https://38jiejie.com/2019/10/22/chinese-actor-xia-fan-makes-mysterious-post-attacking-xiao-zhan/
> 
> Analysis of Yibo’s post the same day after that incident is in the caption of this video -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNh2ZMapOsw


	192. You're wrong this time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song I recommend listening to while reading this - Jay Chou’s love confession  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AxYLa5eqUhc

* * *

”Ge!” Yibo repeated for the third time as he sat in the passenger seat restlessly.

And for the third time, Zhan chuckled and shook his head as he drove them at 1 in the night.

”It’s been half an hour and we’re still driving around. What is going on?”

”Be patient, didi!” Zhan looked at Yibo, amused.

Yibo pouted and looked outside the window. They had left the crowded part of the city behind and he didn't recognize the neighbourhood they were currently driving through. A few more minutes had passed in silence when Yibo turned to Zhan ready to speak once more. 

He paused when Zhan placed a finger on his lips and then stopped the car at the side of the road. He pointed at something outside and gestured to Yibo to look. Yibo followed Zhan’s finger and looked outside the car. He couldn't see much in the dark except for a grove of trees. 

”Ge, I can't see anything...it’s all dark.”

Zhan smiled and got out of the car. He walked over to Yibo’s side and opened the door. He held his hand out and waited. Yibo, although still confused, placed his hand in Zhan’s and stepped out too. He gulped when he saw just how dark it was.

”Don't be scared…,” Zhan whispered and began walking in the direction of the trees, firmly holding onto Yibo’s hand.

For the next few minutes, they walked side by side, hand in hand down a brick path that was lit dimly. The night was silent but Yibo could hear crickets all around them and occasionally they would spot lightning bugs glowing and flitting about.

”Okay, you’re being really quiet and it’s weirding me out, ge.”

”Almost there,” Zhan whispered and Yibo could hear the smile in his voice. 

The path curved around and soon was completely lit up much to Yibo’s relief. But his sigh of relief turned into a gasp when he saw what lay ahead. He stopped in his tracks as he gaped at it.

”We’re here,” Zhan stood behind Yibo and wrapped his arms around him. “Welcome home, sweetie.”

* * *

”What...where...where are we?” Yibo stuttered. “Is this…”

”This is our new home,” Zhan smiled and kissed Yibo’s neck as he swayed them gently in the breeze.

”I thought it would take a few more weeks…,” Yibo’s voice trembled as he took in the sight of the magnificent yet warm home that stood before them.

”I made sure it didn't…,” Zhan grinned and held Yibo tighter when he felt the boy shiver. “Are you cold?”

Yibo turned around in Zhan’s arms and looked at him with shining eyes. Zhan wiped the tear that had slipped out and kissed his cheek.

”I didn't want to wait longer...so I met with the agent in person after my birthday and made it very clear that I needed the place as soon as possible.”

”You? You confronted someone?”

”Hmm,” Zhan let out a soft chuckle. “I said no when she asked for an extension.”

”I can't even imagine you being stern with someone let alone saying no. That’s so not you...why did you do that?”

”Because,” Zhan placed both hands on Yibo’s cheeks and kissed his nose, “I couldn't keep the love of my life waiting anymore. That night, after our fight, I promised myself that I would make this happen. I’m sorry it took two more weeks but it’s ready now. We can move in. And the timing worked out well…”

”Why?” Yibo managed to ask through his tears that had begun flowing again.

Zhan leaned in and took Yibo’s lips in his. He enveloped them lovingly and pulled Yibo closer. Yibo melted into the kiss as Zhan’s hands massaged his back. When they pulled apart, Zhan had a bright smile on his face.

”Happy one year anniversary, sweetie…”

Yibo’s eyes widened as Zhan’s smile grew wider but then he remembered something.

”That’s tomorrow, ge…,” he gave Zhan a smug grin. “You’ve never been good at remembering dates.” He teased.

”Actually,” Zhan smirked just as smugly, “ _you’re_ wrong this time.” 

”No way.” Yibo frowned and shook his head.

”Tomorrow will be the anniversary of our first kiss...but today is the anniversary of when I confessed first, remember?”

”Oh,” Yibo’s grin disappeared as he stood corrected, “fuck…you’re right! You confessed but I didn't say anything like an idiot and made you run away and then we sorted the whole thing out the next day when I slept outside your apartment waiting for you to come back.”

Zhan chuckled and nodded but then his expression turned somber.

”On this day, I did the bravest thing I’ve ever done and confessed my love to you, Wang Yibo. And every day I thank the gods above that they gave me the courage to do that.” 

Yibo smiled even as his tears flowed freely.

”I want you to know I remember everything...even if I forget dates,” Zhan chuckled. “I remember everything about you, about how you make me feel, about our first summer together, about what you like, what you don't like, what makes you smile, what makes you cry, what you want, what drives you,” Zhan leaned in and rested his forehead against Yibo’s. “I remember how our first kiss felt, how it felt to be one with you for the first time, how it felt to wake up with you in my arms for the first time….”

Yibo rubbed their noses together and placed a soft kiss on Zhan’s lips. 

”Are you ready to see our new home?”

”Yes!” Yibo exclaimed and threw himself at Zhan.

Zhan laughed and held onto him tightly, trying not to lose his balance. They stayed in each other’s embrace, enjoying the moment under the night sky. After several minutes, they pulled apart and walked inside together.

* * *

”Wow...this is huge, ge! It’s so spacious for a four bedroom home. Now our apartment feels cramped in comparison,” he laughed.

”There’s one more surprise,” Zhan bit his lower lip in excitement.

”Don't tell me there’s another house,” Yibo cackled. 

”Shut up! Come on!” Zhan grabbed Yibo’s hand and dragged him outside again. 

They walked towards what seemed like a smaller cottage but turned out to be a garage. Yibo watched in anticipation as Zhan pressed a button and the garage door opened. His eyes widened as the space came into view. It was empty but Yibo could see the workspace along the walls and the tools and equipment that lined it.

”This is for your bikes!!” Zhan exclaimed and threw his arms open wide, gesturing at the empty space.

”What the…,” Yibo gasped and walked into the garage. “It’s perfect.”

”You like it?” Zhan asked excitedly. “Do you really like it? I designed the home but I had this specially designed by someone else because I have no clue about bikes and I wanted it to be professional and big enough for both your… “

Before Zhan could finish his sentence, a set of lips crashed into his. Yibo held Zhan’s face in his hands and kissed him senseless. 

”I love it, ge...I love all of it...this..the house...everything…,” Yibo breathed heavily when they surfaced for air. “I love it. I love you.”

"I love you too...," Zhan caught his breath, "...so...this is it? You like it? Nothing you wanna change?"

"Nothing at all. Not one bit. It's perfect!!" Yibo kissed Zhan all over his face.

"Okay! That's a relief!" Zhan laughed as Yibo's lips tickled his neck.

"So...we're doing this?! We're really doing this? We're getting a house together!?" Yibo looked at Zhan with wide eyes, excited and nervous.

”Looks like it!" Zhan exclaimed. 

He ran his hands through Yibo’s hair and stole a few more kisses.

"When do you want to move in, sweetie?”

”As soon as we can, ge. As soon as we can.” Yibo sighed and melted into the kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Previous chapters when XZ and Yibo confessed to each other for the first time - chapters 41 to 44
> 
> * * *
> 
> Random set of images to help you visualize the place, pick whichever one you like haha - 
> 
> https://cdn1.i-scmp.com/sites/default/files/styles/og_image_scmp_explainer/public/images/methode/2018/01/03/f0662826-eb9e-11e7-8d3e-3515408466a8_972x_061418.jpg?itok=jF-SkRUH  
> https://photos.zillowstatic.com/p_e/ISnaapdkoga70e0000000000.jpg
> 
> https://static3.mansionglobal.com/production/media/article-images/b6c23f02835aabf480f0289cc592528c/large_large_17-1813-1.jpg
> 
> https://www.thesantabarbaragroup.com/wp-content/uploads/homes-for-sale-montecito-ca-1.jpg
> 
> https://cdn1.i-scmp.com/sites/default/files/styles/1200x800/public/images/methode/2018/01/03/774450ee-eb9e-11e7-8d3e-3515408466a8_1280x720_061418.jpg?itok=uQO6fIX9
> 
> I love the asian aesthetic of this home -
> 
> https://cdn.cnn.com/cnnnext/dam/assets/160825153722-china-luxury-house-20.jpg
> 
> * * *
> 
> XZ sang Love Confession on TTXS, it’s one of his favorite romantic songs  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9E72JweMpw  
> (the yizhan compilation in the above video is set to the UNIQ song Falling in Love)
> 
> Here he is singing it with X-Nine  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBtj6NVBFog
> 
> Silly video compilation of XZ and Yibo singing it at different times!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWnJkAL3CNA
> 
> And if anyone wants to get more angry at Peng Chu Yue (LMAO) -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VCGVv20Fdpg


	193. It's like music

* * *

When Zhan and Yibo got home, they both got texts simultaneously. 

”Woah!” Zhan exclaimed. “My manager just gave me some amazing news! You’ll never guess what it is!”

”I think I can!” Yibo exclaimed. “My manager just texted me as well!!”

”Isn't it crazy?! The Untamed is going international!?”

”I knew this was going to happen!” Yibo jumped in delight.

”Really? I had no idea we had such a huge following in America!”

”Wait, what?” Yibo stopped jumping. “What did you say?”

”Our show...being picked up by Netflix...in America and some other countries...isn’t that the news you got as well?”

”Holy fuck!” Yibo’s eyes widened. “No! That’s insane!”

”Wait, what news did your manager text you?”

”Our show will be aired in Korea as well!” 

”Holy….wow...that’s crazy too...we’re on a roll!”

They both high-fived and hugged each other in jubilation. They stayed in the embrace for a few seconds before pulling away but not letting go.

”It’s going to get crazier, isn't it?” Zhan sighed with a smile.

”Yeah,” Yibo chuckled.

”Come here,” Zhan whispered and drew Yibo closer by the back of his neck.

They enveloped each other’s lips and melted into the kiss. Zhan led them into the bedroom slowly. He paused at the door, pushing Yibo against it and deepening the kiss as his body pressed into him. 

”Bo-di,” Zhan breathed against Yibo’s neck. “This has been the best one year of my life.”

”Mine too, ge,” Yibo sighed as Zhan licked his way to his shoulder, pulling aside his shirt.

”You make me so happy,” Zhan nipped at Yibo’s skin before taking his shirt off.

”You make me so happy too,” Yibo moaned as Zhan pressed him harder against the door and rolled his hips against him.

”Didi...,” Zhan slowly undid Yibo’s pants and slid his hands inside, grabbing his ass. 

Zhan-ge…”

Zhan hands tugged at his pants and pulled them down swiftly. He massaged Yibo’s erection and mouthed at his chest hungrily. He left a trail of wetness as he knelt and kissed his way down to Yibo’s erection.

He caressed it and planted kisses along the length. He could hear Yibo’s breaths growing heavier with every inch he kissed. He looked up and smirked when he saw Yibo’s eyes shut tight and thrown back against the door.

He licked the length slowly, taking his time. Gradually he began taking it in his mouth. Yibo gasped in pleasure when Zhan licked the head, sliding his tongue over the tip and swirling it all around it.

”Ge…,” Yibo moaned as Zhan began engulfing his erection.

Zhan took Yibo in deeper with each moan and soon, had taken him in completely in his mouth. He worked the hardness slowly at first, but increased his pace as Yibo’s moans turned more erotic and pleading. He could feel himself get hard on hearing his groans.

After a few more seconds, Zhan let go and stood up, eliciting a whine from Yibo. But he took a few steps back and locked his eyes with Yibo’s as he slowly took his clothes off one by one. Yibo mouth remained partially open the entire time his eyes roved Zhan’s body.

When Zhan was completely naked he turned around to get the lube from the nightstand. When he returned to Yibo, he raised his hand and gestured to Yibo to turn around. 

Trembling with anticipation, Yibo turned around and placed both hands on the door. Zhan walked over and poured out some lube on his fingers. He stuck close to Yibo, plastering himself against his back and slowly inserted one finger into him.

”Aah,” Yibo moaned and rested his forehead against the door. “Ge…”

”Happy anniversary, Bo-di,” Zhan nipped at Yibo’s ear and whispered with a smile as he fingered him open.

Yibo turned his face towards Zhan and Zhan leaned forward to seal their lips together. They panted as they kissed each other wildly and messily. Yibo licked Zhan’s lips and mouthed at the corner of his lips, kissing his mole over and over again.

”I love you, ge...aah,” Yibo spoke breathlessly as Zhan began scissoring him. “I love you so much…”

”I can't believe it’s been a year,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s neck as he inserted a third finger. “I can't believe you’re mine and I’m yours.”

”Always,” Yibo threw his head back on Zhan’s shoulder as Zhan found his spot and probed at it repeatedly.

”Promise me,” Zhan reached out for Yibo’s erection with his other hand and began massaging it in sync with his fingering. 

”I...aaah...I promi...aah...promise,” Yibo writhed and arched as the double pleasure overwhelmed his entire body.

Zhan turned Yibo around when he was ready and grabbed him by the hair, kissing him rough and hard. He wrapped his other arm around his waist and pulled him closer as their bodies heated up. He kissed Yibo as if their lives depended on it.

He swooped Yibo off the ground, and Yibo wrapped his legs around Zhan quickly, deepening the kiss until they were gasping for air. Zhan sat on the bed with Yibo on his lap. 

”Didi.” Zhan moaned as Yibo lathered the lube on Zhan’s erection and massaged him. 

Yibo adjusted himself on top of Zhan’s lap and slowly lowered himself onto Zhan’s erection. They gazed into each other’s eyes, the corner of their lips turned up the slightest bit, eyes soft and loving, bodies sweaty and full of want.

Yibo began moving on top of Zhan at a steady rhythm. Zhan’s finger’s dug into his waist and he gradually increased his pace until they were both lapping at each other’s lips again, driven to the edges of their pleasure.

”You’re so beautiful, Yibo,” Zhan whispered in a husky voice as Yibo rode him harder. 

Yibo moaned as Zhan held him tighter and demanded more movement. He wrapped his arms around him tightly and kept going at a feverish pace. As their pleasure began peaking, Zhan stood up and held Yibo in place and flipped them over onto the bed.

He got on top of Yibo and pinned his arms above his head with one hand and grabbed his knee and pushed it up towards his chest, spreading his legs wider. He thrust into him again and again, slapping against Yibo’s body repeatedly.

Zhan moved his hand to Yibo’s erection and squeezed it, his motion in sync with his thrusts. He grunted as Yibo demanded more and gave it to him desperately and willingly. He thrust harder, moved faster, groaned louder. Yibo sank his fingers into Zhan’s back, clawing at the sweaty skin.

”Fuck…,” Yibo exclaimed as Zhan’s hand drove him to the edge of pleasure. “I’m going to come….”

”Me too, didi….,” Zhan’s low voice breathed as he stared at Yibo’s hypnotic face that was filled with pleasure and desire.

”Ge!” Yibo choked as he clutched Zhan harder and came into his hand.

Zhan thrust into Yibo and fucked him through his orgasm. He rammed into him ruthlessly, chasing after him, his senses overwhelmed as Yibo’s warm cum drizzled over his hand and Yibo clenched around him.

The tightness sent him over the edge within seconds and he came rushing into Yibo. They moaned together as Zhan filled Yibo up. Zhan mouthed at Yibo’s neck, licking the sweaty damp skin as Yibo wrapped his plush lips around Zhan’s shoulder. 

When their hearts and bodies had calmed down, Zhan got off Yibo and lay down beside him. With a long satisfied sigh, he pulled Yibo closer into him and Yibo happily cuddled against Zhan, throwing one arm across his chest.

”Happy one year anniversary, sweetie,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s forehead.

”Happy anniversary, ge,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s chin. “I’m so glad I met you.”

”Me too,” Zhan smiled and played with Yibo’s fingers. “I can't believe how lucky I got.”

”I’m the lucky one...the handsome, smart, kind Xiao Zhan that the whole world wants...is all mine!” Yibo grinned.

”Are we starting this, didi?” Zhan raised an eyebrow and grinned back.

Yibo laughed and shook his head. He got on top of Zhan and rubbed their noses together before laying on top of him. He placed his ear against Zhan’s chest and they lay in silence for a while.

”I can hear your heart beating,” Yibo whispered. “It’s so gentle and calm...just like you…except during sex when it goes wild and crazy like you,” Yibo chuckled.

Zhan smacked Yibo's back playfully and ruffled his hair.

”It’s like music,” Yibo whispered, pressing his ears against Zhan’s chest more. “It's like a soothing love song that makes me feel safe. It’s the sweetest melody I’ve heard.”

”So cheesy, Bo-di…,” Zhan chuckled.

”Only for you, ge," Yibo planted a kiss on Zhan's chest. "Only for you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since there are some new readers! Come find me on my twitter!
> 
> [ @jalpari_yizhan](https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan)


	194. Course through his veins

* * *

Zhan yawned as he entered the Our song set after a whole day shooting Oath of love. As soon as he walked in, however, his entire face lit up on seeing Na Ying. The show production team had been very accommodating to his schedule and had agreed to shoot all his episodes together in the span of a few weeks even thought it had been several weeks since he had shot his first episode with Na Ying.

As he saw Na Ying, he remembered their last interaction during which she had advised and helped him through his fight with Yibo. His heart still froze every time his mind went back to that time several weeks ago. He would relive the disappointment he had felt in himself, the fear he had gone through not knowing what Yibo was thinking, the devastation he had experienced when Yibo and him had fought and the panic he had felt when he thought he would never see Yibo again.

But as he walked towards Na Ying now, there was a lightness in his step as he thought of how Yibo and him had weathered that storm and were now stronger than ever. He was excited about their move to the new house over the course of the coming week and he was still on cloud nine from their small anniversary celebration. 

The day after he had surprised Yibo with the house, Yibo had revealed his own little surprise that he had planned. He had secretly been taking cooking lessons from Wang Han and surprised Zhan by cooking a whole meal for him. He had learnt two of Zhan’s favorite dishes and had even baked a simple but delicious cake.

And although the kitchen was a messy disaster after Yibo’s cooking escapade, Zhan had never felt happier and more loved, especially when after the dinner, Yibo had given him his surprise gift - a lego assembly in the shape of a heart with a mole-like dot in the lower left corner with the words _’Zhan-ge, didi ai ni!’_ spelled out with lego blocks.

Zhan had decided to proudly display the gift in his study room until they had moved to the new home and found a better place for it. Yibo’s words from that night still warmed his heart. His loving confessions and promises never failed to make Zhan’s heart flutter. It was even more special that night, given that Yibo had written the lyrics to a short song for Zhan himself.

__

_"You should write your own songs, Bo-di!”_

__

_”Really? You think so?”_

__

_”Yes...this was beautiful...you have the talent for it...maybe you could write your own rap!”_

__

_”I’ll...I’ll try…but…”_

__

_”No buts, didi...do it! I know you can. Now hum the song again...please!”_

__

Zhan couldn't believe that his heart could hold this much love for one person. He felt overwhelmed with the emotion that seemed to course through his veins. It was as if his entire life had conspired with the universe to lead him to Yibo. Two people, 6 years apart, with different careers paths, from different cities, with completely different interests, who probably would never have crossed paths in the way they had if it weren't for their fated roles in the Untamed.

”Ah, Zhan-Zhan!” Na Ying’s cheery voice brought Zhan back to the present. “You’re here!”

”Na-jie!!” Zhan rushed forward and straight into Na Ying’s open arms. 

They hugged each other and Na Ying patted his back affectionately.

”It’s so nice to see you again, Na-jie!” Zhan beamed from ear to ear.

”Same for me, Zhan-Zhan!” Na Ying placed a hand on his cheek. “You look so much lighter...happier...than the last time I saw you. Looks like you made up with your someone special?”

”Yes,” Zhan blushed and smiled. “We did...we sorted things out and are doing better than ever!”

”So that’s why you’re glowing!” She smiled at him mischievously. 

”Na-jie!” Zhan exclaimed and hid his face behind his hands. “We...we celebrated our one year anniversary two days back.”

”Ah, my sweet boy,” she gave him a fond smile, “I am so so happy for you. You deserve all the happiness. I would love to meet them sometime and make sure they’re worthy of my Zhan-Zhan!” She wiggled her finger, feigning strictness.

”Na-jie!” Zhan laughed and shook his head. “I’m the one who’s not worthy...he is perfect,” Zhan lowered his voice. 

”Aya! Young love!” Na Ying teased as she pinched Zhan’s arm.

Zhan giggled and looked at his feet, unable to meet her eyes..

”And I want you to meet him as well.”

”But on a serious note, how are you doing? You still don't look well rested...you look tired...lighter but tired.”

”Work’s been hectic but I have an evening off on November 10th!”

”Not even a whole day off? You call that a break?” Na Ying rolled her eyes. “Isn’t that the whole reason you both fought?”

”It was...but we’ve come to an understanding...he will be more patient and I will balance my schedule better after December...because I’m already booked until then….can't do anything about it,” Zhan looked at her guiltily.

”What am I going to do with you? You better take care of yourself...don't push yourself too hard or you’ll burn out…”

”Yes, Na-jie,” Zhan nodded and bowed slightly.

”So, ready to record today’s songs? I bet you’re super excited about the one you picked? The summer breeze one?”

”Yes,” Zhan couldn't help but smile widely as he thought of how perfect the song was to describe him and Yibo. “But I am also looking forward to the other song, Night at the naval port….my grandma used to sing it to me!”

He was excited about the entire line-up of songs he had in upcoming episodes as well as event performances. He took a special pleasure in the fact that their cp fans would have a field trip analyzing the songs just as they did with all the tidbits of clues he would leave behind.

As they rehearsed and recorded both songs, Zhan found himself at peace and satisfied with his life. He couldn't help but feel thankful for everything in his life. 

”Good job, Zhan-Zhan,” Na Ying removed her headphones after they were done. “You’ve improved so much since our last practice. You work so hard!”

”Thank you, Na-jie,” Zhan bowed.

Just then, Zhan’s phone rang. He apologized to Na Ying who waved her hand to dismiss his apology as he answered the call.

_It’s my driver...that’s strange. I wonder why he’s calling. I hope he didn't get into any accident!_

”Hello? Is everything okay?” Zhan asked hurriedly before his driver could say anything.

”Umm...actually, no...” the other voice replied.

”Oh my...are you okay?” Zhan asked in a concerned voice.

”It’s not me, laoban,” his driver replied, hesitantly before lowering his voice. “It’s Wang Yibo. He’s...he’s in the hospital.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *laoban = boss (apparently, xz's team calls him this! #zsww)
> 
> In reality, XZ didn't get a chance to in that particular episode of Our Song since they came first and didn't need to perform a second song. Na Ying kept saying that he loves the song. In fact, they did perform the song in a later episode.
> 
> Video clip of XZ singing a small bit of the song on Na Ying and the audience’s insistence -  
> https://twitter.com/wenwen11113/status/1203897647909629952?lang=en 
> 
> XZ and Na Ying’s rendition of the whole song with english translation -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IbXyIXZYe3M 
> 
> Here’s the juicy part -
> 
> I came across a video (an audio clip that was taken by a fan during the shooting of that Our Song episode but was not included in the final episode cut) in which the host is asking XZ why he loves the song so much and was so persistent on singing it.
> 
> XZ’s reply - ‘I feel the song describes a scene that is very wonderful. That is during the time of adolescence and awakening, the seeds of love begin to sprout. And then during a windblown summer, a relationship develops. I just really wanted to sing this for everyone to hear.’  
> (at this point all the fangirls begin getting excited!)
> 
> Na Ying’s response: ‘You’ve revealed everything!’
> 
> The said video -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wHRr3AdScic&feature=youtu.be  
> (the fact that they cut this segment out of the episode, makes my bjyxszd senses tingle!!!)
> 
> Just another fan analysis video for your viewing pleasure -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyJL03__F7c


	195. When did you figure it out?

* * *

“It’s Wang Yibo. He’s...he’s in the hospital.”

Zhan felt like the ground had been swept away beneath his feet. He felt his entire body turn numb and a ringing sound echoed in his head.

”Wha...what?”

”Wang Yibo is in the hospital,” his driver repeated. “I am outside if you..if you want to go see him.”

Zhan’s mind turned chaotic and his body turned to jelly.

”I...yes...I will be out in a minute...please...wait...I’ll be right there…,” he stuttered.

He ended the call and stared at an invisible point in the distance. Na Ying noticed the sudden change in his expression as he turned pale and trembled.

”Zhan-Zhan...what is it?” She placed her hand on his shoulder. “Is everything okay?”

”I...I need to go Na-jie…,” his voice shook. “I need to go to the hospital. He’s...I don't know what happened...all I know is that he’s in the hospital….”

”Oh no!” Na Ying exclaimed. “Go..go...we’re done recording here anyway...do you need me to come along?”

Zhan shook his head, still unable to move.

”Come...I’ll walk you to your car,” she held Zhan by the elbow and guided him to where his bag and jacket were kept.

Zhan sprung into action all of a sudden and snapped out of his trance. He grabbed his things and squeezed Na Ying’s hand.

”It’s fine...I’ll head out…,” he bowed lightly. “Thank you, Na-jie.”

”Don't thank me...you should rush...but don't worry...he’s going to be okay...I’m sure…,” she placated him with an encouraging smile.

Zhan didn't say anything in response. He rushed outside and sure enough, his driver was waiting for him upfront. He opened the door for him when Zhan’s shaking hands were unable to do so. Once inside, they made their way quickly and thanks to the time of the night, didn't encounter much traffic.

They drove in silence as Zhan checked his phone for any new messages from Yibo. There were none. Zhan fidgeted with the device and kept refreshing the chat. He went onto Weibo to see if there were any updates on Yibo. But there were no fan videos reporting his latest whereabouts.

”How...how much longer?” He asked his driver.

”Fifteen minutes, laoban.”

Zhan frowned and bit his lips nervously. Then, a thought crossed his mind.

”How…,” he cleared his throat. “How did you know that Bo-d...Yibo is in the hospital?”

”His driver informed me,” the man replied quietly.

”Why?” Zhan asked, thoroughly confused.

”Because there was no one else with him and he knows how...close you two are…”

Zhan eyed the man in the rearview mirror carefully. A few seconds later the man looked back at him in the mirror and then with a long sigh, spoke again.

”Laoban...please don't take this the wrong way….and remember that I respect you and am loyal to you...I would never let any harm come your way…,” he began carefully. “I...we both...know.”

Zhan froze. One part of his brain couldn't comprehend what the man meant while the other understood almost immediately.

”What do you mean?” He whispered, clutching his phone.

”That you and Wang Yibo are cohabiting...and that you are very close to each other.”

Zhan remained silent, fear engulfing his body.

”Don't take this the wrong way...but we drive you two everywhere...we didn't mean to pry but it became obvious after sometime and…,” he paused as he chose his next words, “...and we both arrived at the same...conclusion.”

”Oh…,” was all Zhan could say.

”But please don’t misunderstand…,” the driver added hastily. “We don't...we won’t let this get out...we understand the situation...and will do everything we can to protect you two…”

Zhan’s body relaxed a little at the assurance.

”Thank you,” he muttered, feeling some relief.

”There is no need for that, laoban. I just want you to be happy.”

Zhan smiled as he felt warmth replace the fear and leaned forward placing a hand on the driver’s shoulder.

”I appreciate that.”

”You have been very happy and it’s nice to see you like this after how upset you seemed a few weeks back...not today of course...but don’t worry. Although his driver didn't tell me much because he was in a hurry, I’m sure he’ll be fine.”

”Hmm,” Zhan looked out the window worriedly.

”So...when did you...figure it out? I thought we were being careful.” Zhan turned to look at the man again.

”That you’re together?”

”Hmm.”

”Well...we have a...bet going…,” he grinned sheepishly.

”What?! Zhan exclaimed despite his growing impatience for getting to the hospital.

”My guess is that it was around New year’s because you went straight from the airport to another apartment instead of yours and one day me and his driver began chatting outside your building and I realized it was his apartment that you went to that day. But Wang Yibo’s driver thinks it began last summer when the show was being shot…”

”Oh?” Zhan looked at him in the mirror, thankful for the distraction.

”Because apparently Wang Yibo always chattered about you since back then…,” he chuckled.

Zhan smiled sadly as his mind went back to Yibo. He began imagining all sorts of worst case scenarios and his entire body shuddered at his thoughts. He rubbed his legs nervously, and fiddled with his phone until he accidentally dropped it.

”We’re almost there,” the driver spoke in a gentle voice.

”Hmm,” Zhan hugged himself as he leaned against the window.

When they arrived, Zhan nearly ran out of the car and into the hospital but was stopped by his driver.

”Let me call them first...you might be recognized if we’re not...cautious..,” he held him by the arm as he dialled a number.

Within seconds, Zhan saw a man step out of a car nearby and rush towards them.

”Hello laboan,” the man bowed. “Let me take you to him.”

Zhan nodded and followed the man inside. He noticed the driver calling someone.

”Hello...yes he is here...we are entering the hospital now...should we take the front entrance?” 

He paused as the other person responded.

”Okay...good…”

The man ended the call and addressed Zhan.

”There are no fans here...yet...he’s coming down to escort you...to Yibo.”

Zhan couldn't do anything but nod and was soon met at the lobby by Yibo’s bodyguard who bowed at him when they reached him. 

”He’s still...unconscious…,” the tall bulky man informed Zhan.

Zhan was familiar with the man. He had accompanied Zhan a few times when Yibo had insisted on Zhan borrowing his car and one of his guards when Zhan’s company had refused to provide him with the necessary staff.

”Is he...is he okay? What happened?” Zhan asked in a low voice through his mask as he followed him into the elevator.

”He fainted suddenly...on the TTXS set...while rehearsing a dance...none of the other TTXS brothers were on set today. That’s why we...called your driver.”

”You did the right thing...thank you so much,” Zhan replied gratefully.

”I’m glad you made it,” he replied just as gratefully. “We haven't heard much from the doctor yet…”

Zhan followed the man out of the elevator and down the long white corridor. He hurried inside when the guard opened one of the doors to a private room.

Inside, Zhan stopped mid-step when he saw Yibo lying on the bed, unconscious, and looking more pale and weaker than Zhan had ever seen him. He heard the door being closed behind him.

_What happened to him all of a sudden. He seemed fine this morning. He had to rush out of the house but he seemed normal. Coming to think of it, he’s had early mornings for the last few days. But he came home at a relatively decent time...before me for sure._

Zhan made his way to the bed and pulled the stool so he could sit beside Yibo. He slumped his shoulders as he saw how innocent and fragile Yibo looked and took his limp hand in his.

”I’m here, didi,” Zhan kissed the hand. “I’m right here.”


	196. Given what's at stake

* * *

Zhan held Yibo’s hand gently and placed a kiss on the back. He ran a hand through Yibo’s hair and brushed some strands aside. He was surprised when he felt how warm Yibo’s forehead was. He placed his hand on his cheeks and neck and sighed when he realized that Yibo had a mild fever. 

”I should have paid more attention,” Zhan whispered. “I should have made sure you were taking better care of yourself…”

Just then, Zhan heard footsteps outside and the door knob turned. He placed Yibo’s hand back down just as the person entered the room. The doctor was visibly surprised to see Zhan in the room but smiled and bowed when Zhan stood up and bowed politely.

”I’m glad someone apart from his staff is here,” the man spoke. “Are you family?”

”Yes,” Zhan decided it was best to lie and keep his mask on.

He could see the doctor taking in Zhan’s presence and processing it but then seemingly deciding to not question him more, much to Zhan’s relief.

”So...why...what happened?” Zhan asked.

”Weakness and fatigue...nothing too severe. His blood sugar dropped and it seems that he has been very overworked especially over the last few days. I spoke to his staff and his schedule was very hectic. And from what I gather, he hasn't even eaten regular meals for over three days.”

”Oh,” Zhan’s eyes widened and he gasped.

_How did I not know he’s been skipping meals. I just assumed he grabbed breakfast on the go and ate dinner before I returned._

”I also went over his medical history records in the central system and he has had myocarditis in the past.”

”Yes,” Zhan nodded eagerly. “But it didn't have any long-lasting severe effects….did it?” Zhan added hesitantly.

”We need to check and make sure...so we’ll need to run some tests...but we need your permission….or someone else’s permission first...either direct family or a legal guardian.”

”His family is in Luoyang….I could let them know and sign on their behalf…”

”I don't think we can allow that,” the doctor shook his head. “We can wait for the patient to regain consciousness...the tests aren’t that urgent but we should do them before discharging him. His vitals all seem normal as of now.

”Oh...okay,” Zhan tried not to sound too disappointed. “Thank you, doctor.”

”No problem, also...visiting hours end in half an hour...just so you know.”

”I would like to stay the night in case he wakes up….he...he doesn’t like being alone.”

”I’m sorry...only family is allowed to stay overnight...hospital policy.”

Zhan was at a loss for words. His mind tried to come up with some excuse to stay when it suddenly hit him.

”Doctor…,” he began with a deep breath, “there is something you should know...but I need to know that doctor-patient confidentiality applies to whatever I need to tell you...since it’s sensitive information about the patient...and we’re both public figures.” Zhan stated matter of factly.

The doctor considered his words and then nodded with a kind smile.

”Good,” Zhan nodded before slowly removing his mask. “The truth is...he is my partner...and we are in the process of applying for legal guardianship...I can get the notarized documents for you in a few days but for now, can you please make an exception?”

Silence reigned for several seconds. Finally, the doctor walked over to the bed and spoke in a low voice.

”I will allow it. And you don't need to bring in the papers because otherwise they will become part of the official records. I recognize both of you and trust that you wouldn't lie about this given what’s at stake for you.”

Zhan let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and smiled gratefully. The doctor proceeded to tell Zhan more about the tests and the medicines he prescribed.

”I will tell the custodian to bring you the necessary bedding. But the remaining staff have to go, even the bodyguard.”

”I understand,” Zhan bowed when the doctor took his leave.

He felt a wave of relief spread over him and sat back down beside Yibo and held his hand. A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door.

”Come in,” Zhan replied and let go of Yibo’s hand thinking it was the custodian.

”The doctor just informed me that we have to leave...will you be staying?”

”Yes, I will,” Zhan smiled and took Yibo’s hand in his.

The guard looked relieved and at ease on hearing the words. Zhan told him everything the doctor had explained and then discussed a few more details about Yibo’s schedule for the next day.

”Could you tell my driver to leave as well and come over tomorrow morning at 8 am unless I text him otherwise?”

”I’ll do that,” the guard began to leave the room but then paused before opening the door.

”Is everything okay?” Zhan asked when he noticed the man turn around.

”I’m glad you’re here.”

”Me too.” Zhan smiled and nodded.

”Also…,” the man seemed to hesitate but then grinned and continued, “who won the bet?”

Zhan was taken aback but then tried suppressing his blushing smile. Unable to do so, he gave the man a beaming smile and shook his head.

”Neither of you,” he smirked. “Keep guessing.”

”Dammit,” the man frowned but then smiled again and took his leave.

Zhan chuckled and then turned his attention to Yibo. He massaged the back of his hand with his thumb and sighed.

”You stupid boy,” he murmured. “I’m going to have to take better care of you,” he kissed Yibo’s shoulder and then his cheek.

Reluctantly he let go of his hand pulled out his phone.

_Even though I lied to the doctor, this is something we’ve wanted to do for a while. Maybe now is as good a time as any other. It’s not going to be easy. Neither of us can just show up at the notary office. How are we going to do this?_

When there was another knock, Zhan put his mask back on. A nurse entered the room and handed him the bedding and Zhan thanked her. When she left, Zhan fiddled with his phone pondering over his dilemma. He grunted and then decided to make a call. He dialed a number and stood up and walked over to the window.

”Ayunga? Hi this is Xiao Zhan. I needed some advice...about legal guardianship….do you...have you and Zheng Yunlog….Oh! You have? That’s amazing...I need help figuring out the best way to do this...” 

For the next twenty minutes, Zhan was engrossed in the conversation. He ended it with a smile, feeling much better.

_So we can become legal guardians without revealing our relationship! That is such good news! Ayunga did the smart thing...I think that’s the best solution. Now if only I can figure out how to file the papers without drawing too much attention. Maybe I could use the same organization that Ayunga and Zheng Yunlong used….they seemed happy with their discretion._

”I wish we didn't have to hide so much from so many people...it makes it so much harder,” Zhan let out a sigh and returned to Yibo’s side. 

He bent over and kissed Yibo’s forehead lovingly and stroked his hair.

”But for you...it’s all worth it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some info on legal guardianship in China (do correct me if I got anything wrong!) -
> 
> In 2017 - guardianship was allowed in the context of minors and elderly  
> In July 2019 - it was allowed in context of “special people” ie lgbt  
> The exact wording in one of the documents:  
> “....spouse, parents, adult children, near relatives, closely connected relative or friend willing to bear the responsibility of guardianship…”  
> Note: they don't say partner...but at least have closely connected friend in there!
> 
> https://www.international-guardianship.com/pdf/GBC/GBC_China.pdf  
> https://theconversation.com/how-china-is-legally-recognising-same-sex-couples-but-not-empowering-them-122270  
> https://www.scmp.com/news/china/society/article/3022181/same-sex-couple-beijing-become-first-take-advantage-new-legal  
> http://www.sixthtone.com/news/1004427/how-legal-guardianship-made-my-same-sex-relationship-official


	197. It had to be you

* * *

Zhan suppressed a yawn and stretched his back. He lay out the bedding on the couch and fluffed the pillow before placing it at one end. He sat down with a huff and lay down, his feet dangling off the other end because, as always, he was too tall. But that had never been a problem for Zhan. He turned onto his side and folded into the foetal position, wrapping himself in the blanket like a burrito.

 _Yibo always found my way of sleeping funny._ Zhan reminisced. _Even when I would sleep like this, he would throw himself around me, sticking to me like glue._ Zhan chuckled.

He glanced at Yibo who was still as a rock and his heart dropped. Just then his phone pinged.

> _Ayunga: Is everything okay? Why were you asking me about the guardianship?  
>    
>  Ayunga: Also, here are the contacts of the organization and people I mentioned  
>    
>  Zhan: Thank you! It was really helpful talking to you about this  
>    
>  Zhan: Yibo fainted and is in the hospital...nothing too serious, hopefully  
>    
>  Zhan: But it got me thinking…  
>    
>  Ayunga: Oh! I hope he gets better soon! Let me know if you need anything else!  
>    
>  Zhan: Thank you! I appreciate it _

Zhan saved the contact information Ayunga had shared and then put his phone aside. With a sigh he snuggled into the blanket, eyes fixed on Yibo, when all at once he saw Yibo shift. He sat up, alert, and looked at him more carefully this time.

This time he was sure he saw Yibo move. In the blink of an eye, Zhan was by the bed.

”Bo-di?” He whispered softly. “Bo-di...can you hear me?”

”Mmpf,” Yibo mumbled and groaned as he woke up slowly.

”Didi?” Zhan looked at him in anticipation and massaged his forehead.

”Gege…?” Yibo whispered as his eyes flickered open.

”Yes, puppy,” Zhan smiled as his eyes welled up. “I’m right here.”

”Gege…,” Yibo looked at Zhan and gave him a small smile.

Zhan’s smile widened as relief washed over him. He bent down and placed a kiss on Yibo’s forehead, his nose, his chin, and his lips. He kissed the dry lips gently before pulling away.

”Hey…,” Zhan caressed his cheeks.

”Hi…,” Yibo whispered back.

”You scared me, didi,” Zhan felt a tear escape his eyes as he held Yibo’s hand firmly in his. “How’re you feeling?”

”My head is pounding...and I’m feeling a little weak...but not bad I guess.”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded. “Good. Let me call the doctor.”

Zhan stretched over Yibo and pressed the button near him. A small light lit up and Zhan stole another kiss before the doctor’s arrival.

”Once you get better, you’re in for a real scolding,” Zhan pinched Yibo’s nose lightly.

”Sorry…,” Yibo grinned sheepishly.

”You need to take better care...I need to take better care of you...you’ve not been eating properly...that won't do given how packed your schedule is, puppy…”

Yibo looked at him guiltily and nodded. They heard footsteps and Zhan sat on the stool. The doctor entered and much to Zhan’s relief it was the same one he had spoken with earlier.

”Oh! I see you’re finally awake.” He smiled. “Good...now let’s see how you’re doing…”

He checked Yibo’s vitals and nodded in approval. He made some notes on his chart.

”How’re you feeling? Do you feel dizzy or weak?”

”A little weak…”

”Why don't you try sitting up so I can check.”

Zhan helped Yibo as he sat up and rested against the back of the bed. After the doctor had checked his eye movements, his breathing, and asked a few more questions, he smiled at them satisfied.

”Looks like you’re all fine...I’ll check in on you once more in the morning and then will ready the discharge paperwork.”

”Can he really be discharged so soon?” Zhan asked, worried. “He fainted...he’s still weak…”

”He’ll have to return to work slowly and ease into it but there’s nothing else he needs the hospital staff for…”

”Are you sure...he had a fever a few hours back...maybe you should…”

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo interrupted with an embarrassed face. “I think the doctor knows better than you…”

”Hmm,” Zhan pursed his lips and backed off. “Fine…”

”It’s okay...your concern is understandable,” the doctor chuckled. “He will need the medicines we discussed...and eat regular meals and of course we need to get that test done...now that he’s up, he can authorize it himself.”

”What test?” Yibo asked.

”To make sure your past arrhythmia isn't causing any problems now. Ideally we would have wanted to do that over 24 hours but we needed family approval,” he glanced at Zhan, “but it’s okay, I couldn't feel any irregularity right now. We’ll still run some standard tests...like getting you on a treadmill...and the Tilt-table test to make sure your fainting wasn’t because of your heart.”

Zhan’s face sank at the mere thought of Yibo’s arrhythmia causing him troubles. The doctor noticed his expression and added hastily.

”But there may not be anything to worry about so let’s not jump to any conclusions. You should sleep now and get some rest.”

Yibo nodded and looked at Zhan, smiling as if to reassure him. When the doctor left, he tilted his head at Zhan.

”I’m surprised they let you stay...isn't that only allowed for family…”

”I lied and told him we’re...well I told him the truth, that you are my partner...but I lied about the part where I said we have filed for legal guardianship.” Zhan smirked.

”Wha…” Yibo’s eyes widened. “Is that...Zhan-ge! Is it safe..”

”Doctor patient confidentiality...plus he was very understanding...even allowed me to stay without needing to see the papers. He understands what’s at stake for us.”

”Oh,” Yibo digested the words but then processed the other half of Zhan’s words. “Wait...legal guardianship?”

”I’ve figured it out, didi,” Zhan smiled excitedly and sat beside Yibo on the bed. “I spoke with Ayunga...I want us to file for legal guardianship now...we’ve talked about it before and there’s not going to be any ‘good’ time to do it and I was so scared when you were...and I couldn't do anything...and…”

Yibo caught hold of Zhan’s neck and pulled him in for a kiss. He deepened the kiss immediately and held Zhan close for a few seconds. He smiled and pulled back and rubbed their noses together.

”You talk too much, ge…”

Zhan sighed, resting his forehead against his.

”So you’re on board?”

”Of course…”

”Good...there’s an organization that can help us file and we won't disclose our same sex relationship so we can avoid any...issues later...at least it’ll give us some level of plausible deniability…”

”Hmm,” Yibo looked disappointed but then smiled again. “Sounds good.”

”I know, didi...it’s not everything we want...but it’s…”

”It’s one step closer to what we want,” Yibo finished his sentence.

Zhan nodded and sealed their lips again. Yibo lay back against the back of the bed and Zhan followed. He wrapped his arm around Yibo’s back and held him close. They kissed deeper as Zhan dove further in Yibo with every passing second. Yibo whined when Zhan pulled back, not wanting the kiss to end.

Zhan chuckled and wiped the wetness of Yibo’s lips.

”You need rest,” he held Yibo’s chin.

”Can you…”

”Don't even think of asking me to sleep on this bed with you!” Zhan warned him.

Yibo pouted.

”But I’ll leave the light on...do you want some sound in the background?”

”No,” Yibo shook his head but then his eyes lit up with a sudden idea. “Sing for me?”

Zhan raised an eyebrow and poked his cheek with his tongue, feigning dismissal. But he stood up and tucked Yibo in with a smile. He sat on the stool and massaged Yibo’s chest as he began humming a tune - It had to be you.

_The person who knows how to make me smile  
Would undoubtedly bring out the deepest feelings  
You barged into my heart and left your mark  
But at the same time you lit up the stars  
The entire universe, the endless galaxies  
Every single speckled planet, revolves around you  
Love me...it had to be you  
I’m willing to protect the happiness you have given me  
Love me...it had to be you  
I smile when the tears fall  
Because it’s you, I’m not afraid of any hardship at all  
Many encounters, but you were the only one  
That created a miracle, forged by destiny  
Despite everything you were the only one that made my heart  
Fill up with endless miracles like it was destiny  
Love me...it had to be you  
Love me...it had to be you  
It had to be you... _

As Zhan sang softly, Yibo’s eyes closed and his breathing turned steady and gentle. Zhan smiled as Yibo drifted off into a restful slumber. When the song finished, Zhan stood up quietly and placed a kiss on Yibo’s forehead. He went back to the couch and slept on his side, facing Yibo.

”I love you, didi…,” Zhan whispered into the silent stillness of the room. “‘One day...I’ll give you everything you want...everything we want...one day we’ll be husbands and have a family together. It had to be you...it can only ever be you.”

With those wishful words, Zhan felt himself drifting into a dream world that held memories of the past and wishes for the future. All with Yibo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Arrhythmia test information (just citing my source) -  
> https://www.heart.org/en/health-topics/arrhythmia/symptoms-diagnosis--monitoring-of-arrhythmia/common-tests-for-arrhythmia
> 
> Xiao Zhan singing It had to be you (I highly recommend reading the lyrics I've included in the chapter, they're perfect for yizhan and so romantic and emotional!) -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wxTunMlvqM


	198. What is going on?

* * *

When Zhan’s eyes opened, it was half past six in the morning. He glanced at Yibo who was still sound asleep. He sat up with a yawn and stretched himself to get rid of all the stiffness and soreness from sleeping on the couch.

He had barely slept, waking up every hour to check on Yibo. But he had to leave for work at 8 and hoped the doctor would come before that so he could be there for the final check up.

As he was stretching out his kinks, he heard Yibo mumble something and wake up.

”Bo-di?” Zhan walked over to the bed. “Are you up?”

”Hmm…,” Yibo replied groggily and rubbed his eyes.

”How are you feeling, sweetie?” Zhan smiled and placed a kiss on his forehead.

”Better…,” Yibo smiled back. “As good as new.”

”We’ll let the doctor be the judge of that,” Zhan rolled his eyes but leaned in nonetheless for a kiss. 

He kissed Yibo gently and caressed his neck.

”Good morning,” Zhan whispered when he pulled back.

”Good morning, ge,” Yibo beamed and held onto Zhan’s collar.

”Are you going to let go?” Zhan smirked.

”Nope,” Yibo shook his head with a grin. “More.”

Zhan shook his head fondly and held Yibo’s cheeks in his hand. He leaned in and sealed their lips together. They kissed softly and played with each other’s lips at leisure. They were lost in the cozy sensations and deepened the kiss. Yibo moaned quietly as Zhan tasted him and explored him with his tongue. He clutched Zhan’s collar as Zhan’s hands moved to the back of his neck and ran through his hair.

”You stink,” Zhan rubbed their noses together when they pulled apart.

”You love me,” Yibo looked at him cheekily. 

”That I do,” Zhan chuckled.

Yibo beamed and pulled Zhan closer by the collar, slipping his other hand under Zhan’s shirt.

”Bo-di,” Zhan raised an eyebrow, “...behave.”

”It’s still early,” Yibo gave Zhan a side grin and ran his fingers over Zhan’s nipple. “No one’s going to come here.”

”And what exactly do you intend on doing here?” Zhan shot him a warning glare but didn't pull back.

Yibo massaged the nub, sliding his other hand from Zhan’s collar down his chest, stopping at the waistband of his pants. Zhan’s breath hitched as Yibo unzipped his pants slowly and slipped his hand in.

”Didi,” Zhan whispered. “This is a very bad idea…”

Yibo sat up completely and hung his legs off the side of the bed. He spread his legs and pulled Zhan in closer between them. He smirked and wrapped his hand around Zhan’s dick. Zhan’s breath hitched and he shut his eyes with a hiss as Yibo began moving his hand up and down the now erect dick. 

”Yibo…,” Zhan breathed. “I...I think you should…”

”Kiss me…,” Yibo ordered.

Zhan gasped as Yibo rubbed him harder and fell forward, bracing himself against Yibo’s shoulder. He leaned forward and kissed Yibo, messily and desperately. Yibo quickened his pace and mouthed at Zhan eagerly. 

”Didi…,” Zhan bit his lips as he separated from Yibo’s lips, leaving a wet shine. “Hurry up…”

Yibo smirked and grabbed at Zhan hungrily. He tugged him harder and Zhan moaned against his lips shakily. As he felt Zhan inch towards the edge, he grabbed for a tissue with one hand, his other hand working on Zhan hastily.

”Fuck!” Zhan gasped as he tipped over the edge.

Yibo caught Zhan just in time and used the tissue to gather and clean everything up.

”Fuck…,” Zhan let out a long breath, “you are such a brat!”

”I’m your brat,” Yibo gave him a shit-eating grin. “And you’re welcome!”

Just as Zhan was about to go in for a kiss, they heard footsteps approach the room. Zhan’s eyes widened and he jumped back just in time as the door opened, yanking his zipper up. He smiled awkwardly as the doctor entered, who paused mid-step. Zhan cleared his throat and bowed abruptly.

”Hello, doctor,” Zhan spoke in a flustered tone.

The doctor eyed him, a little unsure and awkward himself and then cleared his own throat before entering the room. He glanced at a smiling Yibo and walked over to him.

”Good morning, young fellow…did you sleep well?” He addressed Yibo with a kind smile.

”Yes,” Yibo curled his lips inwards to suppress his smirk at Zhan’s flustered face.

”Good, you look rested too. Let’s get you to those tests then, shall we?”

”Can I come?” Zhan asked anxiously as Yibo got out of the bed.

”Sorry...you can't enter that area but don't worry it won't take long,” the doctor replied.

”I could wait outside...the room or…”

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo interrupted him gently, “it’ll be okay,” he smiled and winked.

”Hmm,” Zhan surrendered and gave him a slight nod.

Zhan watched as they left the room and then looked around restlessly. With nothing to do but wait Zhan decided to channel his nervous energy in tidying up the room. He disposed of the juice bottles that he had survived through the night on and folded the bedding and kept it neatly in one corner of the couch.

He fluffed Yibo’s pillow and straightened his bedsheet. He gathered their knick-knacks and arranged them neatly on the side table. It took him all of fifteen minutes and then all he could do was wait. He called his driver to check on him and confirm his pickup at 8.

That took another two minutes. Zhan puffed his cheeks and plonked down on the couch with a huff. He fidgeted with the edge of the couch and twisted the fabric until it was knotted. Another five minutes passed this way.

He bit his nails and lips and paced the room. Just then he heard footsteps outside and the door knob turn. He looked at the door with a smile, partially relieved partially nervous.

His smile, however, was short-lived when he saw the person who had entered was neither the doctor nor a nurse. It wasn't even Yibo’s driver or bodyguard.

It was Yibo’s manager.

* * *

”Xiao Zhan?” The prim and proper woman mumbled with a bewildered look on her face. “What are you doing here?”

Immediately following behind her, he heard hurried footsteps and in came Yibo’s bodyguard. Zhan could tell from the look on his face that he had no idea she would be coming. He caught the apologetic look on his face and didn't know how to respond.

”Uhh,” Zhan did his best to act casual and school his expression to mask the shock and fear he was feeling.

”I...I didn't know you were…”

”Here? Yes!” Zhan blurted. “I...I came here to visit Yibo…”

He could see her glance at the bedding on the couch suspiciously and bit his lips as his mind raced to come up with a story.

”Oh…,” she nodded slowly, eyes narrowing, “That’s...nice of you…”

Just then, another person entered the room, calling out cheerfully.

”Zhan-ge! I told you it’ll be okay…,” Yibo exclaimed as he walked in, “you were worrying for no reaso…,” Yibo paused as he saw the crowded room.

”Wha…when did you...get here?” He asked the woman, his eyes darting between her and Zhan.

”Just now.” Yibo’s manager interrupted. “And what is going on?”


	199. The real question

* * *

”What is going on?” Yibo’s manager turned from Yibo to Zhan and back to Yibo again.

”Uhh,” Yibo mumbled, both him and Zhan panicking and at a loss for words.

”He fainted!” Yibo’s bodyguard intervened. “That’s what’s going on...he was too weak and fainted on set yesterday…”

”I know _that_ ,” she shook her head. “What I mean is…”

”How did you know?” Yibo interrupted her, trying to keep her away from the elephant in the room.

”I tried calling you and when you didn't answer I called your driver. He told me everything. I got here as soon as I could! But first, answer my… ” 

”Oh! Look at the time!” Yibo exclaimed. “Zhan-ge...don't you have to leave now?” Yibo bit his lips, staring intently at Zhan.

”Huh?” Zhan muttered and then glanced at the clock. “Wow...it’s 8 already…,” he looked back at Yibo who was nodding furiously. “I should...yeah...I should take my leave.”

He bowed quickly and grabbed his jacket. He walked past the woman, an awkward smile plastered on his face, and towards the door. He paused beside Yibo and spoke carefully.

”Umm...take care...Yibo...and let me know if you...you know...need anything.”

Yibo nodded casually and they clasped hands and bumped shoulders as nonchalantly as they could. With another bow to the manager, Zhan left the room and walked down the corridor.

_Fuck._ Zhan shut his eyes and cursed inwardly. _That was close. Hopefully not too close._

* * *

Silence prevailed for a few seconds after Zhan had left. Yibo’s manager crossed her arms across her chest and glanced once more at the bedding on the couch. She let out a long sigh and turned her attention back to Yibo and his bodyguard who stood right behind him.

”I would like to talk to Yibo alone,” she tilted her head and looked at the guard.

He didn't move and waited for Yibo.

”It’s okay…,” Yibo turned around and nodded. “Could you please get me some breakfast?”

With a nod in response, the man left the room and closed the door behind him.

”How are you feeling?” The woman asked, her face softening just a tad.

”I’m fine now...I just wasn't eating properly and needed some rest…”

She frowned and shook her head.

”Okay...I’ll see what I can do to ease your schedule for the next few days.”

”Thanks,” Yibo breathed a sigh of relief hoping that was the end of the conversation.

He walked to the bed and sat down, smiling when he saw that Zhan had made the bed. His manager sat on the couch and crossed one leg over the other and sat back, eyes fixed on Yibo.

”I was surprised to see Xiao Zhan here,” she spoke in an even neutral tone.

”Really?” Yibo cleared his throat. “He’s a friend...of course he would visit me since I’m here...in the hospital.”

”It doesn’t look like he just visited…,” she pointed at the folded blanket and pillow.

Yibo bit his lower lip and his mind raced to find an appropriate explanation.

”It wasn’t...he didn't...it was my bodyguard who stayed overnight…”

”I don't believe you…,” she stated pointblank. “It was him, wasn't it?”

”Even if it was,” Yibo grew irritated, “it does not concern you and it isn't a big deal.”

”What I really want to know is...how did they allow it...hospital policy only allows family to stay the night.”

”They made an exception,” Yibo shrugged, “since my family isn't here.”

”Hmm,” she narrowed her eyes at him.

”Don't make a big deal out of this…”

”I’ve been with you since you were 18, Yibo,” she stood up and walked over to him. “I’ve watched you grow over the last four years. I would like to think I know you well…”

Yibo gulped, nervous at her words and tone.

”...and I have also seen you with Xiao Zhan over the last year and a half. I’ve never seen you act...the way you act when you are around him.”

”We became close friends...that’s all,” Yibo replied with an unimpressed look. “Why are we still talking about this!?”

”Because...Wang Yibo,” she lowered her voice and looked at the door before going on, “...I don't think you two are _just_ close friends.”

Yibo froze at her directness and even though he had sensed where the conversation was going, he hadn't been prepared for such an upfront confrontation. He tried to calm his racing heart and maintain a poker face.

”First of all...you’re way off,” he replied. “And second of all, even if I am seeing someone, it’s none of your business. I’m not an idol anymore.”

”It _is_ my business. It’s not just your bodyguard’s job to protect you. I have to protect you too. And your career."

”What are you saying?”

”I’m saying...it’s going to be worse if I don't know...than if I know…”

Yibo blinked at her words. He processed them but was stumped by the ambiguity. He couldn't tell if it was a consolation or a threat. He couldn't make out if she was being supportive or not. 

”There’s nothing...to know,” he mumbled in a last ditch attempt.

”Wang Yibo,” she sighed and her face softened, “I…,” she looked down and then back at him, “I need to know...so I can protect you...how long do you think you two can keep this hidden without the help of your team...the people that surround you all the time...did you really think it was possible for us not to know eventually?”

Yibo looked away.

”If there is something you need to tell me…I won’t judge….”

Yibo remained silent.

”You do realize that if this gets out, it will be worse for him? Given the tensions with Wajijiwa….the lawsuit...his new found fame and fan base isn't as steady as yours and…”

”Zhan-ge is strong.” Yibo replied finally, giving in to the situation, knowing the futility of trying to deny it any longer. “He has thought this through just like I have.”

“How long has this been going on?” She groaned in exasperation.

”Long enough for it to be in your own best interest to not say what you are about to say next…,” Yibo grit his teeth.

”Yibo…”

Look...it’s too late to even bother asking me to rethink,” he looked at her intently. “The real question is...can I trust you?”

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: What happened after I left?  
>    
>  Yibo: She...knows  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: What?!?!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Fuck...I’m sorry...I should have gotten rid of the bedding  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: At least that way she would have bought the whole I was just visiting thing!!  
>    
>  Yibo: There’s no need to apologize, ge  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: How bad is it?  
>    
>  Yibo: She’s skeptical...but I think we can trust her  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Really?!!  
>    
>  Yibo: I also told her about us...living together...and the new house  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: What the hell? Yibo! This is all so sudden...I’m nervous, didi  
>    
>  Yibo: She made a good point though  
>    
>  Yibo: How long can we go without our staff knowing?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: That’s probably true…  
>    
>  Yibo: What’s happened has happened, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: All we can do is trust my team  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I trust you  
>    
>  Yibo: Good  
>    
>  Yibo: Are you going to tell your team?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m not sure yet  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: But this is fine...this is good...it’s okay  
>    
>  Yibo: Are you really okay? Don’t panic, alright?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I won’t, don’t worry…did she say anything else?  
>    
>  Yibo: No, that was about it. She seemed understanding...even gave me a small smile before she left...  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: That’s a good sign I guess?  
>    
>  Yibo: I guess so…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Guess we’ll just have to wait and watch. _


	200. What did you think would happen?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XIAO ZHAN POSTED A NEW SONG AND I AM STILL CRYING!!!! 
> 
> Couldn't help but sneak a reference to it in this chapter lol uwu
> 
> AND I am now on my 200th chapter y'all!!! Could my day get any better! THANK YOU to each and every one of you for the kudos, comments and support. I legit wouldn't have gotten this far. Special shout out to my regulars...you know who you are! Happy reading!

* * *

”Thank you so much, Ayunga,” Zhan breathed a sigh of relief as he spoke into the phone.

”No worries, A-Zhan,” the man replied. “Despite what we may think, there are many people in our shoes in this industry. Privacy is very important in such matters. And this organization is trustworthy. They’ve done this for many celebrities.”

”That’s reassuring,” Zhan nodded as he paced his room. “Because if anything...if this got out and anything happened to…”

”Wang Yibo seems like a strong boy,” Ayunga spoke in a gentle voice. “He may be young but he looks like he knows what he wants. I’ve been on TTXS twice and that boy is not afraid to speak his mind. If he wasn’t sure about this, he would have said so.”

”That’s true,” Zhan chuckled. “Sometimes...sometimes I just worry…”

”I understand….trust me. There’s a risk...but it’s worth it. Isn't it?”

Zhan looked out the window. He imagined Yibo’s face when he had told him about the legal guardianship. He remembered the helplessness he had felt at the hospital when Yibo had fainted. Not every doctor would be as understanding as the one they had encountered that time.

”It is,” Zhan whispered. 

_But why does it have to be so damn hard._

* * *

”You’re not backing out on me now, are you Zhan-ge?” Yibo teased, when he saw Zhan’s face as they went over the papers.

But Zhan could hear the hint of insecurity in his voice. He put the papers aside and turned to face Yibo on the couch. He took his hand in his and placed a kiss on the back. 

”Of course not,” Zhan smiled.

Yibo relaxed and smiled back. He intertwined their fingers and leaned forward. Zhan placed his other hand behind Yibo’s neck and pulled him in. They kissed each other gently and at leisure. Zhan’s tongue played with Yibo’s lips and he smiled when he heard Yibo moan softly. He enveloped Yibo’s lips in his and deepened the kiss, diving inside him, tasting him, drowning him in his passion.

When he pulled back, Yibo had a dazed look on his face much to Zhan’s satisfaction.

”Still think I’m going to back out?” Zhan grinned.

”Nope,” Yibo shook his head, still recovering. “That was pretty convincing.”

Zhan chuckled and turned his attention to the papers once more.

”They’ll be here soon,” he gathered the papers. “We should sign these now.”

”I wonder which other celebrities used their services,” Yibo smirked. 

”They’re supposed to be discreet and keep this information confidential. Knowing that would kind of beat the purpose.”

”It’s nice that organizations like this one are working so hard for our rights.”

”Even with such provisions, they know it’s still not completely safe to come out publicly. It’s nice to have this option, especially given...our jobs…”

”Hmm…”

”They looked at each other silently for a few seconds before Zhan let out a long breath and picked up the pen. He began signing the papers, everywhere that had been marked by an x. He read and reread the documents before signing each one. 

Then, he turned to Yibo and handed him the pen. Yibo took it eagerly and licked his lips, biting the lower lip as he sat at the edge of the couch. One by one, he signed each document, placing his signature carefully and diligently beside Zhan’s. 

When he was done, he placed the pen down slowly and stared at the papers. He turned to look at Zhan and then blinked a few times.

”What?” Zhan raised an eyebrow. “You have a strange look on your face.”

”I just...I feel the same…”

”Same? What do you mean?”

”I mean...nothing...changed…”

”I’m not following, didi,” Zhan frowned.

”I thought...once we sign this...it’s a big step...I thought it would feel like a big fucking moment when I signed it...like I would cry...or feel super emotional...or something!!”

Zhan began chuckling when he saw Yibo’s bewildered face. His chuckles turned into laughs the more he thought about what Yibo had said.

”What did you think would happen, didi?! That a breeze would blow and birds would start singing?” Zhan laughed hard as he fell back on the couch.

”Ge!” Yibo exclaimed. “Stop making fun of me!”

”Oh..oh..,” Zhan went on. “Or did you think music would fill the air...or that wangxian would start playing!?” Zhan laughed harder.

Yibo frowned and in one swift motion, pinned Zhan down on the couch and got on top of him.

”You want to laugh? I’ll make you laugh!” Yibo grunted as he poked Zhan.

”Ow!” Zhan choked as he laughed. “Bo-di!”

”Take that!” Yibo smirked and began tickling Zhan.

”Didi! No!” Zhan wriggled under the boy, his laugh interspersed with groans and exclamations.

Yibo continued wrestling Zhan down while tickling him mercilessly. Zhan squirmed and fought back until he couldn’t take it anymore.

”Okay! Okay! I give up! I’m sorry!” Zhan shouted.

Yibo pulled back and sat up, still on top of Zhan, triumphant and smug. He looked at Zhan who was clutching his sides and breathless. He admired Zhan’s flushed face and neck and his messy hair. His heart melted as he saw Zhan smile back and reach out for his shirt.

Yibo let Zhan pull him down again. When their faces were mere inches apart, Zhan brushed aside a strand of hair from Yibo’s eyes and caressed his cheeks.

”This is just paperwork, didi…,” Zhan whispered and rubbed their noses together, “...in our hearts, we’re already one.”

Zhan kissed Yibo’s nose, both his cheeks, and his chin. Yibo gazed at the man before him lovingly and let out a content sigh.

”What are you thinking?” Zhan asked as his fingers ran through Yibo’s hair.

”I’m just thinking about our promise…,” Yibo smirked suddenly.

”What promise?” Zhan tilted his head to one side, confused.

”Oh...you know...Taiwan...2020…,” Yibo spoke casually, smirk still in place.

”Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed with a blush as he tried to push Yibo and sit up.

”What? Feeling shy?” Yibo’s smirk widened and he pinned Zhan’s hands above his head.

”Shut up!” Zhan tried to free himself.

”Why are you blushing, ge?” Yibo teased.

”I am NOT blushing,” Zhan looked away.

”Oh really?” Yibo raised an eyebrow as he countered Zhan’s resistance and kept him pinned down. “I’m going to make you my husband, Xiao Zhan,” Yibo grinned.

”Bo-di!!” Zhan’s eyes widened even as a smile crept up on his face.

”What? I am!” Yibo exclaimed. 

He leaned forward and showered Zhan’s face with kisses. Zhan giggled and finally freed his hands from Yibo’s and placed them on Yibo’s chest. With one push, he made Yibo sit back and sat up himself. 

”Shut up, didi….,” Zhan blushed harder and began to stand up and walk away.

Yibo caught him by the wrist and stopped him.

”You're mine Zhan-ge...I'm gonna lock you down in October 2020…," Yibo announced, still holding onto Zhan’s wrist.

Zhan felt his entire face heat up and he was forced to turn around when Yibo tugged his arm. When he met Yibo’s gaze, he felt his heart flutter. Yibo’s eyes held so much love, loyalty, sincerity and hope. 

”Say it…,” Yibo tugged at Zhan’s hand once more.

”I'm gonna marry you in 2020...and make you my husband,” Zhan whispered shyly.

Yibo stood up, beaming from ear to ear. He wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and pulled him closer.

”Say more things like that,” Yibo whispered back.

Zhan placed a hand on Yibo’s cheek and touched his lips with his thumb, caressing them delicately.

”You’re going to be mine for life…,” Zhan smiled and pulled Yibo against his chest, enclosing him in his arms.

”Now this feels like a milestone moment,” Yibo sighed happily.

”Weirdo,” Zhan rolled his eyes and chuckled.

”I’m your weirdo,” Yibo snuggled in closer.

”You’re my everything.”

”Really?” Yibo looked up with big innocent eyes.

”Really…,” Zhan kissed his nose. “I was made to love you.”

”And I was made to love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone wondering what promise Yibo was referring to...I've written it in a previous chapter which is one of my fav chapters because it's the happiest one according to me...my heart burst into confetti while writing it!
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/22343227/chapters/55290493
> 
> Also...DID I MENTION XIAO ZHAN'S NEW SONG!?!?!?!?!?!!?!??!?!!?!? I'M STILL CRYING!!!!!!!!
> 
> P. S. I don't know much about the actual process for legal guardianship (except that it's done through a notary) so I have kept it simple and in the background of this chapter rather than make up details. And if it wasn't clear from the chapter, I have made up a pretend organization (based on actual LGBTQ NGO's in China that help people file for legal guardianship) that helps celebrities maintain privacy while helping them in this process. Sorry I couldn't depict this process authentically, plus I didn't want more of their teams and lawyers etc to know about them in my storyline just yet.


	201. Sending you a surprise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Timeline check - we are at the end of October 2019 now!

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Sending you a surprise  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Open them when you’re alone  
>    
>  _

Yibo cocked his head on reading the message. But as soon as he downloaded the photos and videos Zhan had sent, his eyes widened and he let out a gasp. He looked around quickly to see if anyone had noticed and thankfully, no one had. He was on set at TTXS and in between shots. He made an excuse to use the restroom and dashed away, seeking some privacy.

”Fuck.” Yibo muttered under his breath as he readied himself and opened the first pic again. 

”Fuck. Fuck.” He repeated as he swiped to the next video. 

He inhaled sharply as he kept going.

Yibo clutched his phone tighter.

He swallowed as heat spread through his body.

”God damn it,” Yibo muttered under his breath as he swiped back and forth between all the images over and over again.

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge! What the fuck are you doing to me?  
>    
>  Yibo: This is pure torture…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: _😏 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Fuck, ge...I want to fuck so bad right now  
>    
>  Yibo: I’m so fucking hard right now  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Don’t have fun without me, didi  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’ll be home in two hours  
>    
>  Yibo: I’ll be home by then too  
>    
>  Yibo: You better not be late _

* * *

Zhan smirked as he put his phone aside. He grabbed the towel around his neck and resumed drying his hair with it. The photographer walked to him with a smile and Zhan smiled back.

”Thank you,” he spoke first. “This was a great fan service idea!”

”Congratulations on your studio reaching 2 million followers!” She replied.

”I can't believe it,” Zhan chuckled. “It happened so fast...we just reached 1 million a month after launching and now in just two weeks since that, we’ve already reached 2 million!” 

”That says a lot about your star power,” she said as she cleaned her lens.

”No...no…,” Zhan smiled in embarrassment. “My team worked very hard and I have the best fans...they are so supportive.”

”Don’t short change yourself,” she took a seat beside Zhan. “You’ve worked quite hard yourself.”

”Thank you,” Zhan shook his head and stood up, “and thanks for executing this idea so well! I should go change,” he smiled politely and bowed. “I need to get home soon.”

The photographer sighed as her eyes trailed after Zhan.

”Whoever he’s going home to is one lucky bitch,” she whispered to herself and eyed Zhan’s ass until the very last moment before he disappeared into another room.

* * *

Yibo hurried to their apartment after his shoot ended. They were still in between the apartment and the new house and things were in general disarray but slowly and steadily, they were moving into their new home. In a few more days, they would begin living in a house they could call their own, together. The mere thought made Yibo’s stomach fill with butterflies.

Once inside the apartment, he sat on the bed, kicking his pants and socks off. He scrolled through the photos from Zhan’s shoot again for the hundredth time and groaned when his dick twitched impatiently. He yanked his shirt off and went in for a shower. A long, cold shower that was filled with his sighs as he prepped and stretched himself out with only images of Zhan’s photoshoot in his head.

When he was done, he dried himself hurriedly but not too meticulously since what he had planned involved him getting wet again anyway. He ransacked one of the boxes marked with things from Zhan’s study and pulled out his camera and tripod. With a smirk, he carried the items into the bathroom.

* * *

”Yibo?” Zhan called out as he toed out of his shoes. “Are you home?”

Within a fraction of a second, Yibo emerged from the bathroom with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. He took a few long impatient strides towards Zhan and before Zhan could even smile completely, attacked his lips.

”Finally,” Yibo growled as he devoured him.

”I take it you liked my surprise.” Zhan smirked.

Yibo pulled back, his eyes darkening as he noticed the slight dampness that still lingered in Zhan’s hair. He caught him by the wrist and led him straight to the bathroom.

Zhan raised his brows when he saw the setup. A bathtub filled with aromatic water. A camera sitting on a tripod, angled carefully. And a hungry, impatient Yibo glaring at him.

”Take your fucking clothes off.”

Zhan removed his clothes one by one slowly, making sure Yibo’s eyes followed his every movement. He saw Yibo gulp as his pants came off and as soon as Zhan was naked, he pushed him against the wall and spoke in a low angry voice.

”I can't believe you showed that side of you to the camera. Your dominant side is only for me. I hate that everyone will get to see that.”

Zhan smiled fondly and wrapped his arms around the half ill tempered and half pouty boy. 

”I’ll do you one better….you get to see all that and more...and I’ll be naked. They won't get to see me like this. Ever.”

Yibo’s eyes dropped to Zhan’s collar and he ran his finger over the bone and along the dip and curve. 

”Mm.” He nodded and then pulled Zhan into the tub. 

”I want to see your face do that again,” he picked up his phone and showed Zhan the images, “...but because of me...and not someone else telling you to do it.”

Zhan grinned as he sat in the tub and pulled Yibo down onto his lap. He let one hand travel to Yibo’s ass and play with his opening.

”Looks like someone’s already prepped,” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

”I wanted to ride you as soon as you got home,” Yibo whispered and without warning lined himself up with Zhan’s erection. “My boyfriend is fucking hot...can you blame me?”

He lowered himself onto Zhan, moaning as he bottomed out. Zhan threw his head back and groaned, feeling Yibo enclose him. 

”Fuck...didi…,” Zhan’s lips parted as pleasure rushed through his body.

He hit back against the tub over and over again as Yibo bounced on him, placing his hands on the tub on either side of Zhan’s shoulder. His eyes stared at Zhan with lust, watching his every microexpression as he felt the waves of ecstacy. 

He got more than he had wanted. Zhan moaned and looked at him through lidded eyes, smouldering and dark. It was ten times hotter in person than the camera could ever capture.

Yibo smirked in satisfaction as he rode Zhan into the night, their erotic sounds echoing through the bathroom, the water lapping against Zhan’s toned naked chest, leaving shiny beds of wetness all over his caramel skin.

* * *

”That’s hot,” Zhan spoke in a low voice as he replayed the video of Yibo riding him in the bathtub. “I should do more sexy shoots if it’ll get you going like this!” He smirked.

”No!” Yibo clung to him as they lay in bed, dried and refreshed. “One is enough, thank you very much. I don't want anyone seeing this side of you!” He pouted.

”So possessive!” Zhan exclaimed and ruffled Yibo’s hair.

”I have to be! Have you looked at you! People are gonna throw themselves at you…”

”Shut up!” Zhan chuckled. “Anyway, we have the Nanjing concert in a few days...excited?”

”Yeah! It’ll be nice seeing everyone again...but this will be our last Untamed event…,” Yibo replied in a dejected voice.

”Not unless we have more releases later that may require another fanmeet?” Zhan offered, trying to cheer Yibo.

”Hmm...maybe,” Yibo snuggled closer and yawned.

”Alright, let’s get some rest. I have an early morning tomorrow.” Zhan kissed Yibo’s forehead.

”Good night, gege,” Yibo whispered as he settled against Zhan’s chest.

”Good night, puppy,” Zhan replied and smiled in satisfaction as he drifted off with Yibo in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was completely self indulgent. I am thirsty for this Xiao Zhan photoshoot!! So much so that I want everyone to suffer with me, hence the images/gifs that I included in the actual chapter. HOW. IS. THIS. MAN. SO. SEXY.
> 
> Also, the only reason I included the bit with the photographer, is because I am the photographer. That is me, sighing and eyeing Xiao Zhan as he walks away, drenched in a white t-shirt and perfectly toned.
> 
> Xiao Zhan’s fan service for his studio Weibo reaching 1 million followers -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TbnOX5TwIpY
> 
> His fan service was the bathtub shoot for reaching 2 million -  
> https://twitter.com/38jiejie/status/1188843672542089219  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1237838114141245443?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1237838323437076481?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1237838519688523778?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/Wangxian247/status/1196352906590654466?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/B1ACKSW4NS/status/1227839611868721152?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/400flux/status/1214896568509222913?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/400flux/status/1214894966373150720?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/wenxlife/status/1196459901519712256?s=20


	202. We are so mad at you both

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I crossed 30k views!!! T_T

* * *

”This is so hectic! We still have these last few boxes to pack and there’s still a backorder pending for some of the new furniture for the house and we leave for Nanjing tomorrow!!” Zhan exclaimed.

”It’ll be okay, ge...we’ll...,” Yibo began but was interrupted by a chaotic Zhan who was walking all around the living room, gaping at the boxes.

”How are we ever going to finally move there...this is hopeless didi...I don't know what to do...it feels like we’ve been packing, moving, packing, moving...but it never ends!!!”

”Hey! Calm down!” Yibo spoke over a hyperventilating Zhan and caught his flailing arms. “Shh…,” he held his hands and soothed him. “Breathe...it’s going to be fine.”

Zhan took in a deep breath and let out a long exhale. With a grunt, he fell forward, letting his forehead fall on Yibo’s shoulder and his body went limp.

”I just want to start living in the new house...and not worry constantly about someone spotting you here…”

”I know,” Yibo massaged his back comfortingly. “Once we’re back from Nanjing, we will wrap this up once and for all before the Hunan TV Double 11 gala. Promise.” He kissed Zhan’s neck.

”But…,” Zhan sighed and lifted his head again to face a smiling Yibo.

”Come here,” Yibo pulled Zhan closer by his shirt and was about to seal their lips together when there was a knock on the door.

They glanced at the door and at each other, confused.

”Are you expecting someone?” Yibo asked.

”No...you?”

”Of course not...barely anyone knows I live here.”

”Go inside,” Zhan began walking to the door, nervous and cautious. 

He looked out through the peephole and immediately gasped.

”Huh?!?” Zhan exclaimed. “It’s...it’s our mothers…”

”What?” Yibo’s jaw dropped. “Both? Here? Together?!”

Zhan hurriedly opened the door as Yibo rushed to his side.

”Mama!? Aunty? Is everything okay? You didn't inform us you were coming! Did something happen?” Zhan asked anxiously.

”No...everything is not alright,” Yibo’s mom stormed in followed by Zhan’s frowning mother.

As soon as they were inside and the door was closed, Yibo’s mom grabbed Zhan by the ear promptly followed by Zhan’s mother who latched onto Yibo’s ear.

”Oww!” Both boys exclaimed as they were dragged further into the living room by their ears.

”You guys took such a big step!” Yibo’s mom scolded. “And all I get is a text, and jie-jie a short voice message?!!”

”No photos of the new house??” Zhan’s mother twisted Yibo’s ear.

”And no warning about the legal guardianship!?” Yibo’s mother wrangled Zhan by the ear.

”Mom!!! Let Zhan-ge go!” Yibo whined, while fanning his own burning ear.

”Mama!! You’re hurting Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed, while hissing at his own pain.

The mothers looked at each other and rolled their eyes. They let the boys go and sighed, smacking their foreheads.

”You two! Even now concerned only about the other!” Yibo’s mom chuckled.

”Sorry, mama…sorry aunty,” Zhan mumbled as he rubbed his red ear. “We...we didn't have time to…”

”That’s no excuse Zhan-Zhan!” Zhan’s mother wiggled her finger.

”Really Bo-Bo,” Yibo’s mother clucked her tongue. “We are so mad at you both!”

Zhan pouted and hung his head in shame and Yibo followed suit.

The mothers continued glaring at them but then gave up with a huff.

”How can we stay angry at these two idiots, jiejie...look at their faces!”

”This is exactly what Zhan-Zhan would do when he was a kid...first do the mischief and then act all cute and apologize.”

Zhan and Yibo looked at each other from the corner of their eyes and grinned. Zhan extended his hand and Yibo high-fived it before looking back at the exasperated but smiling mothers.

”Hello aunty,” Zhan chuckled and stepped forward to hug Yibo’s mother.

”So nice to see you, aunty,” Yibo embraced Zhan’s short mother and hugged her tightly.

After a long warm hug, both boys swapped places and hugged their respective mothers as well. 

”Congratulations you two,” Zhan’s mother squeezed Zhan’s cheeks. “I’m so happy you finally took the step.” 

”Looks like you’re still not done packing for the move though?”

”No!” Zhan pouted and sat down on the couch with a grunt, holding his head in his hands. “It’s hopeless. And we leave for Nanjing tomorrow!”

Yibo sat on the armrest beside Zhan and ran his hand over his back in an effort to console him.

”It’s okay, ge,” he spoke soothingly.

”Don't worry, A-Zhan,” Yibo’s mom sat beside him on the couch. “We’re here now...while you’re away we’ll finish packing the remaining items.”

”Really?” Zhan looked up at her, wide eyed and hopeful.

”Really,” she smiled wide and held his face in her hands. “Don’t fret, my dear boy!”

”Now…,” Zhan’s mother placed her purse down, “let’s get some food in you boys. You always look so thin!!”

* * *

After dinner was wrapped up, the four of them sat around the coffee table, sipping tea.

Zhan sat on the floor in front of Yibo’s mom as she massaged his head.

”The house looks beautiful,” Zhan’s mother beamed as Yibo showed her the photos on his phone. “I can't wait to see it in person.”

”Hmm…Zhan-ge picked it and designed the interiors himself! Isn’t it perfect?!” Yibo showed her more photos excitedly.

”Yes, yes, your Zhan-ge can do no wrong,” she chuckled and ruffled the boy’s hair.

”Yibo, can you pass me a tissue,” Zhan rubbed his nose and sniffled.

”Are you sick?” Yibo’s mom felt his forehead. “You’re a little warm. You might be coming down with something.”

”Maybe...my throat’s a little itchy.”

”That’s not good,” Yibo scooted closer and placed his hand against Zhan’s neck. “When did you start feeling sick? You never said anything.”

”It’s not a big deal...probably just from the late night shoots in the cold...for Oath of love.”

Yibo frowned and then stood up and went into the bedroom.

He returned with a medicine in his hand and grabbed a glass of water from the kitchen.

”Here...take this before it gets worse…”

Zhan nodded and took the medicine obediently. The rest of the evening was spent in packing and much to Zhan’s surprise and relief, their mothers were so efficient that they had everything packed except their essentials in the bedroom by midnight.

With the last box packed, they retreated to one of the guest rooms and prepared it for the unexpected visitors. They sat around in comfortable silence, as the women unpacked their bags and freshened up.

”What time do you two leave tomorrow?”

”We’re not going to be travelling together…,” Zhan replied. “I’ll be heading there first...and Bo-di will join me there a few hours later, right?”

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded. 

”You’re going to be there for two days, right?”

Both boys nodded in sync.

”We can all unpack together when you’re back then,” Zhan’s mother smiled.

”Uhh,” Zhan bit his lips. “I won't be here for the next few weeks after Nanjing?”

”Oh...yeah…,” Yibo remembered all of a sudden.

”Sorry,” Zhan eyed him cautiously, guilt and fear creeping up on him slowly. “I...I…,” Zhan fumbled for words as memories of their big fight began rushing into his mind.

”Zhan-Zhan!” His mother scowled. “How will you ever have time for yourself and your personal life if you keep running from one place to another for work.”

”Sorry,” Zhan looked down, sad and guilty. “It’s...just that...I made all these commitments a long time ago before we…”

”It’s okay, aunty” Yibo smiled and held Zhan’s hand, massaging the back with his thumb. “It’s just a matter of two more months… and then you’ll balance your schedule better, right?” He turned to look at Zhan.

”I promise,” Zhan squeezed Yibo’s hand and nodded.


	203. Are you trying to make it obvious?

* * *

After the concert's rehearsals were done, Zhan retreated to his room and lay on his back on the bed in a starfish position. He took in a deep breath through his clogged nose and reached for another tissue. He coughed as he tried blowing his nose open but to no avail.

When there was a knock on the door, he got up with a groan and walked sluggishly to the door.

”Zhan-ge,” a worried face greeted him when he opened it.

Zhan gave Yibo a tired smile and opened the door wide. Yibo walked in and shut the door behind him. He held Zhan by the arm and massaged it soothingly as his other hand reached for Zhan’s forehead.

”You don't look good…,” Yibo frowned.

”Are you calling me ugly, Bo-di?” Zhan pouted playfully.

Yibo smiled and shook his head and pinched Zhan’s cheek.

”My boyfriend can never look ugly.”

Zhan beamed, all his teeth on display, as he nodded in satisfaction.

”You become such a baby when you’re sick,” Yibo chuckled and led Zhan back to the bed. “We have a few more hours for the concert. You should sleep it off.”

”Only if you’ll sleep with me...oh wait...no...I don't want to get you sick.”

”I’m not going anywhere,” Yibo deadpanned. “Now, lie down.”

”Sweetie...I really think you should…”

”Ge! Have this tablet and lie down.”

”Fine!” Zhan gave up and did as he was told. 

Yibo tucked him in and got under the covers beside him. He pulled Zhan to his chest and massaged his back as Zhan snuggled closer.

”I can't believe I have to sing again in a few hours,” Zhan sniffled and cleared his throat. “I’ll have to do so much talking...and play all those games...and my eyes are watering.”

”I wish I could do something, ge…,” Yibo kissed the top of Zhan’s head.

”Mmm,” Zhan sighed and turned his face towards Yibo. “Don’t leave me while I sleep, okay?”

”I’m not going anywhere,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s nose. “Now close your eyes and get some sleep.”

* * *

When Zhan woke up, Yibo was still by his side. Zhan could tell he was awake and on his phone, but he had one arm around Zhan and it seemed like he had not changed his position the entire time Zhan slept.

”Hey, didi,” Zhan mumbled, still very drowsy and groggy.

”You’re up,” Yibo put his phone aside, “I was going to wake you in another fifteen minutes. How’re you feeling?”

”Same...I guess,” Zhan shrugged and sighed as Yibo felt his forehead and neck.

”Same is not good, ge.” Yibo pursed his lips.

He placed a kiss on Zhan’s warm forehead and raised himself up against the headboard. With another sigh, Zhan sat up with Yibo’s help.

”Maybe a warm shower will help...I should do some salt water gargling too…”

”Do you feel weak?”

”A little bit...I think if I take the medicine once more before we have to get on stage, I’ll be able to get through.”

”I’ll be right there by your side, okay?” Yibo helped Zhan stand up. "I'll help you when you're singing...even if it means singing lousily over you."

”Hmm,” Zhan chuckled and nodded. “I have the best boyfriend in the world.”

”No...I have the best boyfriend in the world…”

”I love you, you sap,” Zhan grinned. 

”I love you too, ge. And I love taking care of you.”

"I love you taking care of me too," Zhan grinned.

* * *

”There you are, I’ve been looking…,” Yibo’s manager walked hurriedly towards him but stopped when she saw Zhan walking alongside him.

It was the first time she was seeing Zhan after her conversation with Yibo. The conversation had ended as well as it could have but there had been a palpable tension every time she caught Yibo smiling at his phone or whispering into a call. She schooled her expression as they made their way to her. She could see an awkward smile planted on Zhan’s face but she could also see the heavy bags under his watering eyes and the redness of his sniffling nose.

”Hello, Xiao Zhan,” she nodded. “How are you? You seem ill.”

”Umm...hello,” Zhan bowed trying to mask his nervousness. “Do I look that bad?” He chuckled.

”No...no…I mean…”

”I was just joking...I am a little sick...but I’ve just take some medicines…”

”That’s good…”

”Xiao Zhan!” Another female voice called out from the distance.

They looked back to see Zhan’s manager rushing towards them. 

”I was just about to...what happened to you...you look horrible?!”

”Just a little under the weather,” Zhan replied.

”Oh good...you’ve gotta push through it...this is a very important event…”

”I know,” Zhan cleared his throat and sniffled.

”Good...plus you’ve got a lot on your plate right after...you go straight to Oath of love and…”

”He knows,” Yibo interrupted her abruptly.

Zhan’s manager looked at him in surprise but didn't say anything further, caught off guard by his sudden response. Up until then, Yibo had never spoken in front of her, let alone spoken to her.

Zhan cleared his throat once more to break the tense silence and began walking again. 

”We should head backstage,” he led the way.

Yibo loosened his expression a bit and nodded, following close behind Zhan. Zhan’s manager glanced at Yibo’s manager but received nothing in return. She blinked as Yibo’s manager followed the boys but didn't fail to catch the subtle nervousness on her face.

When Yibo’s manager caught up with them, she squeezed in between and whispered quietly despite the urgency in her voice.

”What was that, Yibo?”

”What?” Yibo feigned ignorance.

”You know what..,” she rolled her eyes. “Are you _trying_ to make it obvious to Xiao Zhan’s manager?!”

Yibo glanced at Zhan who was looking straight ahead, saying nothing, as they walked at a brisk pace.

”Sorry,” he whispered, more at Zhan than his manager.

Zhan finally turned to face Yibo on hearing the sincere apology.

”It’s okay, Bo-di,” Zhan smiled reassuringly.

Yibo’s body relaxed on seeing Zhan’s bright face and he smiled back.

”Xiao Zhan,” the woman addressed Zhan who now looked at her properly for the first time, without a hint of anxiety. “I know this is none of my business...but I don't think it’s a good idea for your manager to know…”

”And why is that?” Zhan cocked his head, curious.

”Well, firstly there’s...your issues with Wajijiwa...and secondly…,” she glanced back and noticed that Zhan’s manager was preoccupied on her phone, “secondly, she has a bit of a reputation,” she lowered her voice further, prompting Zhan and Yibo to both lean in to hear her.

”What do you mean?” Yibo frowned. “Get to the point.”

But before she could continue any further, they heard footsteps catching up with them and a voice call out.

”Alright, guys!” Zhan’s manager exclaimed. “They’re ready for you...we need to hurry. And have a good show!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XZ really was sick for the Nanjing concert. Videos and BTS coming in the next chapter!


	204. I was just doing my job

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: The parts about both managers are completely fictional. There is no information out there, to the best of my knowledge, that tells us anything about Yibo and Xiao Zhan's managers and their nature. It's all just made up by me for the sake of the plot. 
> 
> And as usual, I'm a slow burn kind of gal and will let the managers' roles in all of this build slowly.

* * *

Zhan somehow managed to get through the day. Mainly due to Yibo. True to his word, Yibo was on his side the entire night. During the game segment, Yibo looked out for Zhan and spared him, ensuring that his participation was kept to a minimum. 

Even when they were singing, Yibo had, once again true to his words, sung his parts with him to mask his breaking voice. They had sung the entire second half of the song together, instead of alternating the lines as was the correct way. Zhan couldn't help but smile widely at Yibo who grinned along as he belted the words over the track.

After they were done with the first day’s performances, Zhan sat down backstage unable to move. His head was spinning and he was flush and sweating due to all the exertion. As he closed his eyes to rest them for a bit, he felt a presence close by.

He smiled and looked up, expecting to see Yibo but was taken aback when it was Yibo’s manager instead. 

”Yibo is on a call with the CEO of Yuehua...he asked me to give you this tablet…,” she smiled and sat down beside him, handing him the medicine and a bottle of water.

”Thank you,” Zhan smiled back and took the tablet.

”You did well out there,” she spoke kindly. “Hopefully this,” she pointed at his flushed face, “means you’re sweating it out and should ride it out overnight.”

”Hope so too,” Zhan sighed.

They sat in silence and Zhan could tell she wanted to say something more, so he waited patiently.

”Yibo is…,” she began, “...he is...he can be rash. It doesn’t help that he is both a Leo and an Ox. Impulsive and stubborn. Not a good combination.”

”The way I see it,” Zhan replied softly, “is he knows what he wants and goes after it with determination. That’s why he is where he is in his career today. Both his careers.”

”That’s also true,” the woman huffed and leaned back in resignation. “But he’s young...only 22…”

”He was younger when he left home for Korea to become an idol...and he was only 20 when he decided to pursue a second career. Yibo has seen and done more in his 22 years than either of us did at that age.” Zhan spoke firmly.

”Hmm,” she processed his words, seeing that he would counter everything he said. “But…,” she tried one final time, “this could end his career...at least one of them...maybe both.”

Zhan froze at the words for a brief moment. He drank some more water and took a deep breath. Finally, gathering all his will power, he spoke again.

”And you think he doesn’t know that?”

”I just wanted to make sure _you_ know that.”

Something in Zhan flinched at her words. A sense of dread crept up on him.

”What’s his call with the CEO about?” Zhan asked, suddenly scared.

”Don't worry,” she replied hastily. “I would never...I would never do something like that. I am here to protect him...and his career. And that’s what I am trying to do...right now. One of you has to be smart about this...think rationally...and make the right choice...it might be difficult but...”

”Do you think I would hurt him by leaving him just out of fear of what may happen if this gets out? Do you think we haven't thought about that possibility?”

She remained silent.

”Do you really think that he would be happy if I made this decision for him? Do you really think his happiness comes only from his career? If you do, then you don't know Yibo at all.”

There was no response.

”Yibo is an adult. If he ever wants to choose his career, he can make that decision on his own.” Zhan trembled at the mere thought but kept going. “If one day, this isn't what he wants, he can walk away. You or I are no one to make this decision for him. He is not a child.”

”Fine,” she raised her hands in surrender. “I was just doing my job as his manager. But…,” she turned to him with a small smile, “it’s good to know that you think this way. You truly understand and respect him.”

Zhan was baffled by her sudden soft tone and kind smile. 

”I…”

”I’m sorry...even though I want his happiness, every now and then I will put the manager cap on and do my job of keeping you both in check. But I will never bring... _this_ topic up again. Truce?” She extended her hand out towards Zhan.

Zhan’s face softened and he shook her hand.

”Truce.”

* * *

Zhan was nearly ready for bed when there was a soft knock on the door. With an excited smile he rushed to open it and was overjoyed to finally see Yibo.

”Sorry, ge…I had to take some work calls,” Yibo looked at him guiltily.

”You don't have to apologize for that, didi,” Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo and rested his head on his shoulder. “I’m glad you’re here.”

”Me too...I was worried you had already slept and I would disturb you.”

”I was just about to sleep...you’ll sleep here tonight?”

”Of course, ge,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s temple. “You did so well today...I bet no one could tell you were so sick.”

”I sang horribly though...but thanks,” Zhan snuggled closer.

”No you didn’t...now come on...get in bed...I’ll take a quick shower.” 

Zhan nodded and got into bed, cozy under the warm blanket. When Yibo emerged from the bathroom, he opened his arms wide, beckoning him to join him.

Yibo smiled and crept under the thick blanket and laid one arm across Zhan’s chest, pulling him closer.

”Did you take your medicine?”

”Your manager gave it to me,” Zhan leaned in closer, tucking himself comfortably against Yibo’s neck.

”Oh, yeah...sorry if she’s been weird...I hope she hasn't...said anything to you?”

”Don’t get angry….but I’m not going to lie to you...she expressed her concerns...and told me about all the bad things that could happen to you…”

”What the...I told her not to go there…,” Yibo grit his teeth and reached for his phone. “I’m going to…”

”No, sweetie,” Zhan pulled him back and wrapped his arm around his waist once more. “She was only doing her job. We ended the conversation on a good note…”

”Are you sure? Are you lying to me to protect me?”

”I would never do that, Yibo...you can protect yourself...I would never keep anything from you.”

”Promise...promise me you won't do something stupid just to...protect me...whatever that may be…,” Yibo asked and Zhan could see a hint of vulnerability and fear in his eyes.

”Never,” Zhan placed a kiss at the corner of Yibo's mouth lightly, steadfast and sure. “Breaking up with you...leaving you...just out of fear or to protect you in some way is not an option.”

Yibo looked at Zhan in relief.

”The only reason that would happen is if you choose to...if you want to...I would never make that decision on your behalf.”

”Don't say that...I would never want to break up with you...ever…,” Yibo caressed Zhan’s cheek and placed a kiss on it.

”Good,” Zhan basked in the affection. “I would never want to break up with you too.”

”Now get some sleep...enough of this heavy conversation.”

”Hmm,” Zhan turned onto his side and pulled Yibo closer.

Yibo lay behind Zhan, snuggled up close and hugged him, spooning him to his satisfaction. He massaged him and planted loving kisses on his shoulder and back until he heard Zhan’s steady breathing interspersed with light snoring thanks to his blocked nose.

”I’ll never let you go, Zhan-ge...especially not because of this stupid society and its rules.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nanjing concert  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJ1HqVdAmIo  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsUaOfubEzA 
> 
> BTS  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFwqQTtqzeQ  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsrYomhPBME  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wbKUh7wI1g  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPgBTNJfHIw  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Vam4fT8k2Y  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHg4m_Clt2w


	205. I want you

* * *

”Didi…,” Zhan mumbled groggily when he woke up the next morning. 

”I’m right here, ge,” Yibo whispered. “You should sleep in today...we don't have anything in the first half today.”

”Mmm…,” Zhan cuddled closer. “Don't go…”

”I kinda have to go for some time, ge...have some work stuff,” Yibo planted a kiss on Zhan’s nose. “But I’ll come back as soon as I’m done.”

Zhan grumbled and pouted and held onto Yibo by his shirt.

”No,” he whined.

Yibo smiled fondly and leaned forward and showered Zhan’s face with kisses.

”I have to go, sweetheart…”

Zhan giggled as Yibo’s lips tickled his skin.

”Say it’s okay for me to go,” Yibo troubled Zhan’s neck.

”Okay...okay!” Zhan giggled louder. “It’s okay...go...go! Just come back soon.”

”I will...and looks like your fever is gone,” Yibo smiled brightly. “How do your nose and throat feel?”

”Better...not as blocked and itchy...doesn’t hurt that much when I talk,” Zhan brushed his fingers along his throat.

”Alright...good...take the medicine even so...okay?” Yibo placed a kiss on Zhan’s forehead before getting off the bed and going to shower.

When he returned, Zhan was already fast asleep, much to his relief. He walked over and placed a light kiss on his cheek. He set an alarm on Zhan’s phone and then carefully left the room.

* * *

When Zhan woke up, Yibo was still not back. He stretched and spread across the bed with a grumpy sigh. He reached for his phone and looked at the time. He still had ten more minutes for the alarm Yibo had set. He turned the alarm off with a smile.

_Always so thoughtful, my Bo-di...I wonder why he hasn’t returned yet._

He opened WeChat and sure enough, there were messages from Yibo.

> _Bo-di: I’m still stuck with my manager, ge  
>    
>  Bo-di: Sorry, ge!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Hope you’re feeling better now  
>    
>  Bo-di: I should be there in half an hour  
>    
>  Bo-di: I promise I’ll make it back before we have to get ready for tonight’s concert _

Zhan smiled fondly and sat up. He saw that the messages were sent fourty minutes back.

> _Zhan: It’s okay, sweetie  
>    
>  Zhan: I’m feeling much better!  
>    
>  Zhan: I think the nap helped  
>    
>  Bo-di: That’s so good, ge  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m on my way to your room  
>    
>  Bo-di: I have your key card  
>    
>  Zhan: Okay, didi...come quickly!  
>    
>  Zhan: I miss you_☹️ 

Just then, the door opened and Yibo entered and hurried to Zhan’s bed.

”Hey,” he smiled and sat beside Zhan, immediately placing a hand on his forehead. “You look much fresher...and healthier…”

”I feel better…,” Zhan leaned into the touch.

”Good, guess I don’t need to fuss over you anymore,” Yibo smirked.

”Noo!” Zhan pouted. “I’m not completely fine yet,” he batted his eyelashes.

”Come here,” Yibo shook his head with a chuckle and pulled Zhan into a kiss.

Zhan sighed happily as Yibo deepened the kiss but whined a little when he pulled back sooner than Zhan would have liked.

”We need to leave now…”

”Just a quickie?” Zhan pouted.

”Ge!” Yibo chuckled and shook his head. “No! You’re still sick…”

”Fine,” Zhan sighed, “I can't believe you’re denying a sick man his one wish...”

Yibo smacked his forehead as Zhan deepened his pout and stood up.

”That’s not fair, ge...don’t act cute…”

”I’m just sad,” Zhan made his eyes bigger and let his bunny teeth show. “My boyfriend doesn’t want me…”

”Ge…,” Yibo licked his lips and stood up as well. “I do...want you…”

”Then show me…,” Zhan whispered, running his finger over Yibo’s lips.

”I want you...,” Yibo stepped closer until their faces were mere inches from each other, “...I want you to get your cute ass in the bathroom and freshen up so we can go get ready!”

Yibo rotated Zhan around in the direction of the bathroom and smacked him on his ass lightly, pushing him towards it. Zhan yelped in surprise and turned to see Yibo cackling at him.

”You!” Zhan began and bared his teeth at Yibo. “You…”

But before he could finish, a soft set of lips enclosed his. Yibo planted a gentle kiss on his lips and pulled back smiling.

”Later, Zhan-ge...we’ll do whatever you want later...when you feel better.”

Zhan grunted in partial annoyance even as his lips couldn't help but smile at Yibo’s sweetness.

”Fine!” He walked to the bathroom. “Day two...here we come!”

* * *

The first half of the concert was an interview of the entire cast. Zhan was comforted by the fact that most of the cast was present on day two and he wouldn't have to do all the talking as everyone would answer each question one by one. 

He sat through the questions, dazed and lost in his own world most of the time, always brought back to the present by Yibo who made sure Zhan was awake and paying attention every now and then. 

As the hosts went through the long list of questions and a longer queue of people to answer those questions, Zhan couldn't help but drift off into his own thoughts.

_It seems like Yibo’s manager is on board with us as of now. She seems trustworthy. I wonder what she meant about my manager...I’ve had no trouble with her yet...but of course she’s been appointed to me by Wajijiwa...maybe if I interviewed and picked my own manager I would know them better inside out...but this one...she might be more loyal to Wajijiwa than me._

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo’s low voice brought Zhan back to reality. 

”Huh?” Zhan’s eyes snapped onto Yibo.

”We’re done…where’s your attention?”

”Oh...yeah,” Zhan picked up his mic and stood up a second after Yibo.

As they waited to exit the stage, Zhan couldn't help but cough a little and Yibo glanced at him sidewards with a frown.

_He’s still so sick. And we still have to sing!_

After several minutes of waiting and photo taking, they were finally let off stage. As soon as they were backstage, Yibo placed a hand on Zhan’s elbow and led him towards the dressing rooms. 

”Bo-di...what are you…”

”I got an extra tablet just in case,” Yibo walked over to his things and pulled out a strip.

He popped one slot open and handed Zhan the pill. Zhan smiled gratefully and took the medicine with the water bottle on the table. 

”And here are some cough drops...suck on them when your throat feels itchy...they should get you till the end of the show…,” Yibo placed a handful of cough drops beside Zhan’s bottle.

Zhan looked around and pursed his lips on seeing some staff members walk in as Yibo rambled on about always having the right medicines at hand especially when travelling. He swallowed the rising heat in his body and took a step closer to Yibo and lowered his voice.

”Stop being the perfect boyfriend or I’ll have to fuck you right here…”

Yibo paused mid-sentence and his eyes widened as Zhan whispered the words to him.

”Huh?” A flustered Yibo raised his eyebrows.

”I said,” Zhan leaned forward and covered his mouth with one hand to repeat himself. “Stop being the perfect fucking boyfriend...or I won't be able to control myself any longer…”

”Zha...Zhan-ge…,” Yibo bit his lips nervously and looked around.

”Bo-di,” Zhan purred softly before stepping back and popped a cough drop in his mouth.

Yibo gulped and adjusted his tie. He cleared his throat when Zhan smirked. 

”I should go get ready now,” Zhan shrugged. “Unless there’s something you want to do...real quick?” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

”N…no…,” Yibo loosened his tie and shook his head. “I should get ready too...we literally only have a few minutes…”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded slowly. “It’s a shame. I was in the mood for something….hot,” Zhan whispered as he leaned forward and placed the wrapper in Yibo’s hand.

”Uhh,” Yibo’s mind drew a blank as he felt the heat rush from Zhan’s hand through his entire body.

”Oh by the way,” Zhan pretended to continue casually, “you do realize I’ll be leaving directly after this performance right?”

”Huh?” Yibo’s jaw dropped.

”Pity.” Zhan clucked his tongue. “Your loss.”

With that he turned around and sauntered away, leaving behind a gaping Yibo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nanjing concert  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJ1HqVdAmIo  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsUaOfubEzA 
> 
> Full fancam  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7JFFRQRn2I


	206. Their final bow

* * *

They got through their performances smoother this time around. As Yibo was rising onto stage on the platform, Zhan walked to greet him with his trademark smile. Yibo could never resist that smile each time he joined him on stage for Wuji. He would always smile back softly and the cameras would always click the moment perfectly.

This time was no different, Zhan’s radiant smile welcomed him onto stage and they began their duet for what would be the final time. They breezed through the song, looking at each sometimes playfully and sometimes bashfully. As always they messed up the ending and couldn't help but gaze into each other’s twinkling eyes and laugh as the music died.

One note of Zhan’s open, heavenly laughter and Yibo’s heart melted. 

_I would give anything in this world to keep that smile on his face forever. Anything._

Zhan’s eyes crinkled into half moons as he placed his mic back down and giggled. He saw the soft look on Yibo’s face and knew exactly what he was thinking.

_My didi...always so soft and sappy._

They made their way backstage, still chuckling about their goof-up. Yibo couldn't help the wave of affection that rose in his chest and raised his hand to Zhan’s back, massaging it gently. Although a little taken aback by the physical contact in public, something they had been very careful to avoid up until that point in their appearances in front of the fans and cameras ever since the rise of their cp, Zhan patted him back and shook his head fondly.

_Sometimes, even after all these months, he still can't help but let his affections show._

They walked backstage and were almost immediately herded into a line with the rest of the cast for their final bow. As they stood on stage once more, waiting for everyone to say their goodbyes, Zhan and Yibo stood silently beside each other.

With each goodbye, they felt their hearts break a little. As the rest of the cast bid the audience their farewell, Zhan and Yibo held back their tears. Finally, it was Yibo’s turn. 

”Lan Wangji. Gusu Lan sect. Goodbye.”

With a soft yet firm goodbye, he clasped his hands together and bowed for one last time as the one and only Lan Wangji. 

_Nothing I say or do can thank the universe enough for giving me this one in a lifetime opportunity to be a part of something this magical. That summer changed my life. This role changed my life._

Yibo glanced at Zhan sideways as he straightened himself up once more.

_It feels like everything I have done in my life led me to this role, this show, and this man. I am forever grateful to the strange cosmic forces that brought us together. We may be saying our goodbyes to these characters, but I will carry them forever in my heart. Nothing can make me forget this time. Lan Wangji will forever be in me and I will always carry a piece of him wherever I go. The love our fans have given us has forever intertwined us together._

Next, it was Zhan’s turn to bid farewell. He smiled shakily, his eyes shining with unshed tears.

”Wei Wuxian. Yunmeng clan. Goodbye.”

Zhan’s voice cracked towards the end of his goodbye as he clasped his hands in front of him and bowed with finality. He curled his lips inwards to stop their trembling but to no avail. He looked around, a little lost, very emotional, and completely overwhelmed.

_I can't believe this journey of almost two years is finally coming to an end. Who knew that this show would change my life completely...in every way possible. My career has taken off in ways I could never even imagine. My personal life...what do I even...how do I even begin to tell people how much this show means to me._

__

He glanced at Yibo who raised his hand to wave at the audience and followed suit.

__

_I found the love of my life. I found a meaning to everything I did to get here and will do from now on. Xian-Xian will forever live in my heart even though I have now left him to the one he loves. Just like he brought me to the one I love. All his past hurt and miseries have now ended. Just as mine have. I hope no one goes through the pain he did and that everyone finds the peace and happiness and love that he did in the end._

__

With a nod to Yibo, Zhan led the way off stage and together, they left the stage that was their last connection to their beloved Untamed audience.

__

The entire cast sat in the dressing room in silence. Some were on their phones and some were in small groups, chatting quietly. There was a heavy sadness in the air and once the staff announced that it was time to leave, everyone turned to face each other.

__

Zhan gathered everyone in a circle, with Yibo and Haikuan by his sides. He wrapped his arms around their backs and everyone followed suit. 

__

”I’m so glad I had the chance to work on this show with all of you,” Zhan began softly, tears still lingering in the corner of his eyes.

__

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and sad smiles graced everyone’s faces.

__

”I will never...ever...forget our summer together,” he continued. “And I can never forget my time with each and everyone of you.”

__

”This show changed all our lives,” Haikuan smiled and nodded.

__

They went around the circle, reliving fond memories and saying their goodbyes. One by one their managers came to get them and with long hugs, they began dispersing. 

__

When the cameras found Zhan and Yibo again, Zhan gave Yibo a knowing look.

__

_Camera face on._ Zhan sighed. _Need to leave now and I can't even give him a proper hug._

__

Zhan nodded at his manager and walked ahead with his team as Yibo followed behind, listening intently to his manager as she briefed him on his next set of commitments.

__

”I’m leaving, Lao Wang,” Zhan called out, sucking on the cough drop Yibo had given him, before he exited the backstage area.

__

”Bye bye!” Yibo replied with a wave.

__

”Bye bye!” Zhan waved back and turned around to leave.

__

_Zhan-ge said he has to leave immediately. And I still have to finish this discussion with my manager._ Yibo sulked.

__

As if sensing Yibo’s thoughts, his manager leaned in closer and whispered.

__

”Wait for the cameras to leave...I can buy you a few minutes if you want to head back to the hotel to say goodbye.”

__

Yibo’s eyes widened and he looked at her, astonished yet gratefully.

__

Once he was done with his meeting and went outside, he rushed to his car and was escorted back to the hotel in record time.

__

When he reached Zhan’s room, none of his team members seemed to be around much to his relief. He knocked on the door impatiently.

__

”Bo-di?” Zhan looked surprised and took a few steps back as Yibo barged in.

__

Without wasting any time, Yibo held Zhan by his face and sealed their lips together. Zhan smiled against Yibo’s lips and melted into the kiss. He moaned as Yibo dove into him hurriedly and urgently. 

__

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo breathed.

__

Zhan pushed Yibo against the door and plastered his body against him. He ran his hand through his hair and rolled his hips against Yibo. Yibo moaned into his mouth as Zhan kissed him passionately, never letting him surface for air.

__

Just as Zhan’s hand reached to undo Yibo’s overalls, there was a knock on the door.

__

”Xiao Zhan? Are you done yet?” Zhan’s manager’s voice interrupted them. ‘It’s time to leave.”

__

Zhan growled and pulled back reluctantly and stared at Yibo, pursing his lips.

__

”I’ll be right there…” He replied.

__

”Guess we’ll have to continue this next time,” he grunted.

__

”Hmm,” Yibo grinned and ran his hands down Zhan’s back. “Guess so...I just came to say a proper goodbye.”

__

”I’m glad you did...didn't think you had the time.”

__

”My...manager made sure I did…”

__

”Oh…,” Zhan raised his eyebrows. “That’s...nice…”

__

”Looks like we have an ally in her…”

__

”Hmm.” Zhan looked at him thoughtfully. 

__

”I wonder if we...can trust your team too...it might make things easier for us...little less sneaking around…”

__

”Let’s hold off on that a little longer?”

__

”Okay,” Yibo nodded and kissed Zhan’s cheek. “Whatever you think is best.”

__

”Thanks,” Zhan smiled and placed a soft kiss on Yibo’s lips. “I should get going now...leave after a few minutes, okay? Just to be safe.”

__

”Yep,” Yibo smiled back and placed more kisses on Zhan’s face before he let him go.

__

With one final kiss, Zhan grabbed his bags and left the room. Yibo sighed and rested his forehead against the door, a tired smile on his face.

__

_I love you, Zhan-ge...it never gets easier to be apart from you._

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some more random bts  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WSSeN2HkbA  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrSYDr5X4aA  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xJ7Nls6Mu4
> 
> The goodbye at the end of the concert  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3uxoBpMf-0w  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ub7KMokq0oc
> 
> End of wuji back pats  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-hML8AWiLY


	207. I could go again

* * *

”Bo-bo,” Yibo’s mother walked into his bedroom as they unpacked the last remaining boxes in the new home.

”You forgot this box...it’s marked bedroom...and I dare not open this?” She smirked.

”Mom!!” Yibo groaned. “Just...put it down wherever, I’ll get to it after this one.”

Just then, his phone lit up with a video call.

”It’s Zhan-ge!” He smiled brightly and answered it immediately.

”Hey sweetie,” Zhan’s tired voice spoke first. “God...I miss you so much...it’s so good to see your face after the day I’ve had…”

”Ge!” Yibo cleared his throat. “You’re on speaker and my mom is right here,” Yibo blushed.

”Oh..fuc...I mean...hi aunty!” Zhan called out, biting his lips in embarrassment.

”Hello, Zhan-Zhan,” Yibo’s mother chuckled and walked into view as Yibo tilted the phone to include her in the frame.

”How’s the unpacking going? I’m so sorry I can’t be there to help.”

”It’s okay...your mom and I are glad to help…don’t worry about it.”

”Is that Zhan-Zhan?” Zhan’s mother rushed into the room.

”Mama!” Zhan exclaimed as she joined the call and waved excitedly at her.

”When are you going to be back?” She waved back.

”Another week, mama,” Zhan smiled sheepishly. “Sorry.”

”No need to apologize, ge,” Yibo interjected with a kind smile. “We’ll meet at the Hunan TV gala on the 11th, right?”

”I…,” Zhan beamed suddenly. “I adjusted my schedule by half a day, so I’ll actually be back the night before the event instead of the day of.”

”Really?” Yibo perked up.

”That’s good,” Zhan’s mother nodded in approval. “You can get a good night’s rest. You look so tired and sleep deprived.

”Alright, we should get back to work,” Yibo’s mom sighed and stood up. “Let these two love birds talk alone,” she winked.

”Aunty!” Zhan giggled but couldn't help his blush.

Once the mothers left, Yibo closed the door and fell back on the bed, resting his head on his arms and smiled fondly at Zhan. They sat in silence for a few seconds, gazing at each other lovingly.

”Hey,” Zhan smiled wide and blew a kiss to Yibo.

”Hi,” Yibo pretended to catch the kiss and placed it on his cheek.

”Missing you a lot...how’s the new house?”

”Miss you too,” Yibo sighed. “The house is coming together really well...but it’ll feel like home only when you’re back.”

”By the way, I loved your dance rehearsal video for the Hunan tv gala...it was so hot...and perfect.” Zhan licked his lips.

”Yeah?” Yibo grinned. “How hot?”

”So hot I jacked off to it immediately...” Zhan’s eyes darkened.

Yibo gulped and his breath hitched as his mind conjured up images of Zhan jerking off to him dancing. He glanced at the door and then bit his lips. He stood up and walked to the bathroom and locked the door behind him.

”I could go again,” Zhan raised an eyebrow and smirked.

Before Zhan could say anything more, Yibo yanked his t-shirt and shorts off and placed the camera on the bathroom counter. He backed up against the wall so Zhan could see his entire naked body.

Zhan shuffled his pants lower and pulled out his already erect dick. He licked his lips and began moving his hands on it slowly, eyeing every inch of Yibo’s toned body.

”Fuck, Bo-di...you’re so hot,” he spoke in a low voice.

Yibo’s breathing grew heavier as he massaged his own erection, eyes never once leaving Zhan’s long hardness. They increased their pace in sync, staring at each other with lust.

”I can't wait to come back and fuck you in every room of the new house,” Zhan growled.

Yibo moaned and threw his head back against the wall. His other hand reached lower and cupped his balls. Zhan bit his lips and began stroking himself harder and faster.

Yibo put on a show. He writhed against the wall, rolling his sinuous body seductively. He ran one hand down his chest, pinching his nipples along the way and moaning louder.

”Fuck…,” Zhan grunted in a raspy voice and stroked himself faster.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo sighed, breath wet and heavy. 

”First...I’ll fuck you in the balcony...we haven’t done that yet,” Zhan smirked.

”Hmm,” Yibo tugged at his hardness. “And then…?”

”Then I’m going to fuck you in the kitchen...eat some chocolate syrup off you…”

”I..fuck, ge...I want that now…”

”Soon, didi,” Zhan groaned as he began inching towards the edges of his pleasure. “Soon...fuck…”

”Hmm,” Yibo’s voice came in broken gasps, “Can’t wait…”

”Turn around,” Zhan ordered even as his breaths became heavier. “I wanna see that ass.”

Yibo smirked and did as he was told. He slapped one hand against the wall desperately as he stroked himself furiously.

”I can't wait to eat that ass, Bo-di,” Zhan grit his teeth.

Yibo looked over his shoulder and flushed. The images Zhan’s words conjured in his mind were enough to throw him over the edge. With a loud moan, he came fast and hard on the wall.

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo panted as his climax sent a shockwave through his body. “Fuck…,” he clenched his fist and pressed it further into the wall. 

He turned around, breathless and sweaty, and watched as Zhan pushed himself over the edge with a deep growl. He could feel his dick twitch as Zhan’s entire body flushed and he came all over his stomach. He licked his lips, wanting to lick every droplet off Zhan’s shining damp skin instead.

”Aah…,” Zhan fell back against the headboard of his bed with a satisfied sigh. “Bo-di,” he panted. “Fuck…”

Yibo grinned as he finally came back down from his high. He ran his clean hand through his sweaty hair and let out a small laugh.

”Six more days, ge…”

”Six more days,” Zhan chuckled as he wiped himself down.

”What’s next on your list?” Yibo grabbed a tissue.

”So many more roles to play…,” Zhan winked.

”Fuck yeah,” Yibo picked up the phone and smiled at Zhan. 

”Love you, Bo-di!” Zhan snuggled with his pillow and exclaimed.

”Love you too, Zhan-ge,” Yibo grinned wider as he put his shirt back on.

”By the way, I picked a song for the Hunan tv gala.”

”Let me guess..it’s for me?” Yibo teased.

”Always.” Zhan gave him a soft smile.

Yibo put on his clothes and walked out of the bathroom back to the bed. Zhan tucked himself in cozily and watched as Yibo showed him how much he had unpacked and arranged and how many boxes were still left. He gazed affectionately as Yibo pulled out some old trinkets that held many memories.

Photos with the entire cast of the Untamed, photos from their Greece trip, keepsakes from the Untamed set, shells that they had collected from the beaches in Greece, souvenirs from their travels, handwritten notes that Yibo would leave around the house, and so on.

”It looks great, didi,” Zhan spoke when Yibo was done.

”It’ll look even better when you come back and finish the decor.”

”Hmm,” Zhan yawned and nodded. “Okay, didi...I should get some sleep now. Have an early morning tomorrow.”

”Good night, ge...sweet dreams...only of me,” Yibo puckered his lips.

Zhan shook his head and laughed.

”Only of you, didi...always only of you.”


	208. It's just part of our job

* * *

”Bo-di! I’m home!” Zhan exclaimed, as he walked in, luggage in tow. “Finally! In the new house!” He added excitedly.

He looked around but couldn't see Yibo anywhere. He walked upstairs and dropped his bags in the bedroom and walked through all the rooms happily. It finally began sinking in that this was their new home.

But soon, his smile turned into a frown when he didn’t see Yibo anywhere. 

”Yibo?” He called out. 

”Out here,” he heard a soft voice respond as he walked past the balcony.

Zhan walked out and immediately lit up on seeing Yibo. The boy stood at the edge of the balcony, his back to Zhan, gazing out at the scenery. Zhan embraced him from behind and kissed his neck.

”Hey sweetie…,” Zhan whispered and planted more kisses along his shoulder.

Yibo kept on staring ahead and didn't respond.

”What happened?” Zhan looked at him carefully, sensing the dullness. “You seem...upset.”

Yibo looked down and still didn't say anything. Zhan turned him around by the waist and tilted his face up by his chin. 

”Hey,” he spoke softly. “What is it, sweetie?”

Yibo looked at Zhan, and Zhan could see the tears welling up in his eyes. He looked at him, eyes widening, and cupped his cheek.

”Bo-di?” Zhan asked worriedly. “Talk to me...what happened, didi?”

Yibo took in a deep breath and shook his head.

”It’s silly.”

”I don't care...if it’s upsetting you this much, I want to know!”

”I...I saw the photos…”

”What photos?” Zhan asked in confusion.

Yibo sighed and took his phone out. He pulled up some photos and turned the phone towards Zhan. Zhan froze when he saw the images Yibo was referring to. He took the phone and swiped, his surprise turning into a frown and then into a resigned exhale.

The photos were of him and Yang Zi, on location shooting for Oath of love. Some were promotional photos taken in the form of candids and polaroids, of them posing as a couple, side by side, cuddling, kissing. Others were behind the scene videos of them talking, smiling, laughing, playing around, even seemingly flirting. And then there was the footage of them kissing for a scene. Several takes, in fact, of them kissing.

”Didi…,” Zhan whispered. 

”I don't want to hear it...nothing you say will make me feel better,” Yibo looked away, letting the tears finally slide.

”Bo-di,” Zhan pleaded and caressed his cheek. “You know this is all just…fan service...to generate interest….in the show...in us as a pair...”

”I know…,” Yibo whispered almost inaudibly. “Doesn’t make it any easier…”

Zhan remained silent. 

”Did you really have to…,” Yibo spoke after several seconds, “...get so close to her?”

Zhan felt a pang of guilt.

”Didi...it was just fan service...I promise...we did become good friends...but it was all for the cameras...of course we grew comfortable with each other...but she has a boyfriend...she’s committed...just like I am...to you.” He massaged Yibo’s cheek with his thumb.

”It’s...it’s still hard to see…”

”I know didi...but it’s just part of our job…”

Yibo’s tears flowed more freely and he remained silent.

”Wang Yibo...look at me...please…”

Yibo looked up slowly, with innocent pained eyes.

”I love you…,” he rested his forehead against his. “Only you...I’m sorry you had to see this...but just know that...none of this is real…”

”I know...I know that, ge...but I don't know why I can’t...I just can't get over it...it hurts so much.”

“I know, sweetie,” Zhan pulled him closer against his chest and massaged his back. “I know...I would feel the same...but you have to...we have to get used to this...it’ll get easier…”

”It won’t…”

”It will, puppy...maybe next time...maybe we shouldn't look at these things from now on...it’ll spare you the hurt.”

”Hmm,” Yibo wiped his cheeks and buried his face into Zhan’s chest. “You’re right.”

Zhan kissed Yibo’s forehead and held him tight. They stood in silence as he swayed with him gently in the evening breeze.

After several minutes, Yibo pulled back with a long breath. He looked at Zhan and traced his face with one finger. He ran the finger along Zhan’s jaw and over his lips. 

Zhan ran his fingers through Yibo’s hair and rested his hand behind his neck. He pulled him into a kiss and enveloped his lips. Yibo sighed and melted into Zhan’s tender lips. Zhan kissed him slowly, lovingly, endlessly.

He wrapped one arm around Yibo’s waist and pressed their bodies together, diving deeper into him. He played with his tongue, lapping at him softly, licking his lips, tasting every inch of him until they were breathless.

When Zhan pulled back, he looked into Yibo’s eyes and lifted his hand to his lips, kissing the knuckles repeatedly.

”Wanna go inside now?” He whispered as he planted more kisses on the back of Yibo’s hand.

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded, still visibly dull.

Zhan held his hand firmly and led him inside. As they walked to the bedroom, Zhan spoke quietly.

”The house looks amazing...already feels like home. Thank you for doing so much of the unpacking.”

”It was fun with mom and aunty helping me,” Yibo managed a small smile and sniffled.

”There’s the smile I love,” Zhan stopped mid step and placed a quick on Yibo’s lips. 

Yibo’s smile grew wider and they entered the bedroom which still had some unpacked boxes.

”Do you want me to help unpack these now?”

”No, ge...you should get a good night’s sleep...you look so sleep deprived. Plus, we have a long event tomorrow. You gotta be fresh for it.”

”Do you know how crazy our fans are going knowing that we both are appearing at the same event?” Zhan chuckled. “There’s so much speculation on whether we’ll be performing together or interacting even.”

”Shame we’re not performing together,” Yibo pouted. “We’ll barely be able to be backstage at the same time since I’m hosting. Will you even get to watch my dance?”

”Of course! I wouldn't miss it! I go on right after you...I’ll be by the stage watching you,” Zhan grinned and took his jacket off. “Now come on...I wanna shower with my handsome boyfriend…,” Zhan smirked and walked backwards to the bathroom, pulling Yibo with him.

”Just a shower?” Yibo teased as he followed Zhan.

Zhan shook his head, his smirk growing wider. 

”Why don't I show you what else I wanna do with you…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oath of love leaked photos and videos -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fG4_VwEFkKc
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPakRCivWh8
> 
> https://www.facebook.com/232466350860085/posts/655217445251638/
> 
> https://scontent-yyz1-1.cdninstagram.com/v/t51.2885-15/sh0.08/e35/s640x640/83366394_174029623902488_7479788693889874877_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-yyz1-1.cdninstagram.com&_nc_cat=108&_nc_ohc=Y4sMz4vWv0EAX-2W3Zx&oh=c619065e69d8160beef5f192d321d813&oe=5ECC29E8
> 
> * * *
> 
> Some yang zi news and rumors - 
> 
> https://www.hotpot.tv/news/yang-zi-spotted-on-a-date-with-a-mystery-man
> 
> https://www.sporela.com/index.php/latest-entertainment-news/7467-yang-zi-and-boyfriend-one-night-in-beijing


	209. With soft smiles on their faces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick question: I have a handful yizhan one shots and also a yizhan AU that I'm writing. Would you prefer me posting them once this story is done (or at least caught up to the present)? Or should I post it simultaneously?

* * *

Yibo shivered as he felt the cold of the tiles against his cheek and chest as Zhan pressed his body into the wall. He moaned as Zhan scissored him opened, massaging his weak spot over and over again each time.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo’s helpless voice echoed in the bathroom.

”Does that feel good?” Zhan whispered and nibbled on Yibo’s ear from behind. “Want more?”

”Mmm,” Yibo whined and then moaned louder when Zhan inserted a third finger and fingered him mercilessly.

After a few more seconds, Zhan pulled his fingers out and lined up with Yibo. Yibo rested his forehead against the tiled wall and arched his back, pushing back into Zhan eagerly.

Zhan began entering Yibo slowly, both letting out long drawn out groans as they finally became one after weeks of separation. Zhan mouthed at Yibo’s back as he bottomed out and began moving at a gentle pace at first.

”Fuck I missed you,” Zhan moaned against Yibo’s wet skin as he rocked back and forth, entering him deeper each time.

”I missed you too, ge...so much…,” Yibo bit his lips and threw his head back onto Zhan’s shoulder as he increased his pace.

Zhan grunted with every thrust and rammed into Yibo, his grip on Yibo’s hips tightening, leaving red marks on the soft skin. He pulled Yibo harder each time and closed his eyes, savoring the sensations he had been craving for so long.

”Faster, ge...I need more….please,” Yibo’s shaky voice pleaded.

Zhan was more than happy to oblige. He thrust harder and harder, sending shockwaves through their bodies. Yibo moaned and his hands found their way behind Zhan and landed on his ass. He clawed at the toned muscle, begging for more, needing more.

Zhan growled and entered Yibo ruthlessly, drowning in the tightness that surrounded his throbbing erection. As he hit Yibo’s spot over and over again, he could feel Yibo nearing his climax. With one final thrust, he had Yibo coming against the wall as he bent forward, the orgasm spreading through his entire body.

Zhan fucked him through it, breathing heavily as he chased his own pleasure. He came hard and strong and fell forward onto Yibo as he reeled in the after shock. He bit down on Yibo’s shoulder, pulling him closer by the waist as he filled him up.

”Aah…,” Zhan shuddered through the last few waves of his orgasm. 

When he pulled out, Yibo turned around and Zhan fell forward against him, resting his forehead on his shoulder. They stayed that way for several seconds as their breathing became normal once again.

”God I love fucking you,” Zhan exhaled and stood back. “Feels so good inside you…”

Yibo laughed and nodded. He walked them back and turned the shower on, holding onto Zhan as they let the water drench them.

* * *

”I love you, ge,” Yibo whispered after they tucked themselves in bed.

”I love you too, didi,” Zhan pulled Yibo closer. 

Yibo threw his arm and leg around Zhan’s body, clinging to him like a koala.

”I don't think...I don't like having to share you…”

”You’re not sharing me with anyone...I’m yours and only yours…”

”You know what I mean.”

”Yibo…,” Zhan pulled away and turned onto his side, coming face to face with Yibo. “You’re going to have to do this too you know...and then I’ll be the one at the receiving end...and we’re just going to have to...accept that...I know how possessive you are...but sweetie...are you going to make yourself miserable over this every time….?”

”I don't want to be miserable...but I don’t know how to let go…”

”You just have to keep reminding yourself that I love _you_...and I belong to you...and am loyal to you...and only you can make me feel this way...everything else is just me acting...playing a character that isn’t me.”

”Hmm,” Yibo once again snuggled into Zhan and sighed. “Okay…”

”Good puppy….now let’s sleep...we have a long day tomorrow…,” Zhan yawned.

”Good night, ge,” Yibo yawned along and cuddled closer.

Zhan smiled as he held Yibo’s warm body close to his. He glanced around the room and felt complete in the moment, not wanting to be anywhere else.

_This is my life. I can’t believe it. Yibo in my arms. Sleeping in our new home. I don't need anything else in my life. This is all I want right here. Everything else that comes my way is just a bonus._

”Good night, didi,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s temple and closed his eyes.

They fell asleep with soft smiles on their faces, as they lay in each other’s arms, happy and content.

* * *

When Zhan woke up the next morning, Yibo was still in his arms. He looked down and smiled when he saw the way Yibo was sleeping - his cheek squished against Zhan’s chest, one arm and one leg flung across Zhan while the other leg was entangled with Zhan’s leg.

Zhan chuckled at his clinginess and tried to slowly shuffle out from underneath him only to be pulled closer with a soft whine.

”Good morning, didi,” Zhan attempted to wriggle out of Yibo’s grip again. “I have to get ready...have some meetings before the gala.”

”No…,” Yibo grabbed Zhan’s shirt and shook his head. “Five more minutes…”

Zhan sighed and lay back and he could feel Yibo smile against his chest. He shook his head and stretched as he settled in again.

”What are you going to be wearing at the gala tonight?” Zhan played with Yibo’s hair.

”A grey three piece suit with a white shirt and a pink bow and pocket square…for when I’m hosting.”

”Aww,” Zhan cooed, “you’re going to look so cute...I mean handsome in that!”

”I’m not cute!!” Yibo pinched Zhan’s stomach.

”Handsome!” Zhan yelped. “I meant handsome!”

”Hmm,” Yibo settled down again and continued. “And a black ensemble for my dance performance...with a turtleneck and a hat...and actually…,” Yibo trailed off. 

”Actually what?” Zhan adjusted them so he was lying beside Yibo on his side, facing him.

”I got these necklaces to wear...like metallic chains...and thought we could both wear them?”

”Like a matching set?” Zhan grinned. 

”Hmm,” Yibo smiled shyly as they kept gazing at each other. “Like a perfectly matched set.”

”I like that...my stylist gave me three options...I’ll pick the black and white monochromatic look...our performance clothing can match too…”

”I wish I could be on stage when they interview you after your performance...but I’ll be changing after my performance…”

”I know didi...you’re performance is right before mine...you won't make it back on stage in time to join us,” Zhan stroked his cheeks softly.

”Plus, I think…,” Yibo hesitated, “Han-ge seems to think it’s smarter that we don't have too much interaction on stage…”

”Oh...why?” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

”He said that since the Untamed promotions are done, we should let our cp craziness calm down a bit so there isn’t that much spotlight on us and we can...have a little more freedom you know?”

”Maybe he’s right,” Zhan turned onto his back and stared at the ceiling. “It would be nice to meet you in public and not have to watch every single move or have a thousand people scream and bring everyone’s attention to us,” he chuckled.

”I don't know if that will stop but he thinks there needs to be less talk about us and our cp so that...nothing bad happens.”

”Hmm…”

”Are you mad?” Yibo sat up and asked worriedly.

”Of course not, puppy,” Zhan sat up and pinched his cheek. “He’s right. We’ll be careful and we need things to go back to some form of normal so that if we’re seen together in public it won’t wreak havoc all over Weibo.”

”Mmm...still wanna leave love clues?” Yibo grinned as he sat on top of Zhan and leaned forward.

”Always…,” Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo and pulled him closer. “Let’s do the necklace.”

”That the only thing?” Yibo pouted.

”I could leave some more...clues,” Zhan spoke in a low raspy voice as his tongue made its way from Yibo’s ear and down his neck. “Want me to?”

”Mmm,” Yibo moaned softly as Zhan’s lips wrapped themselves around the skin where his neck curved and dipped. 

”Good thing you’ll be in a turtleneck then,” Zhan grinned and then sucked on the skin gently.

”Fuck,” Yibo whispered as Zhan sunk his teeth in further and rolled them over, getting on top.

”Okay, didi…,” Zhan smirked and bit his lower lip as his hand made its way down to Yibo's ass. “Since you asked for it…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So excited for the 11-11 Hunan TV gala in the next chapter!!
> 
> Also, the necklaces -
> 
> https://twitter.com/dramapotatoe/status/1193529938013376512  
> https://twitter.com/tuziwwx/status/1193533618783576065  
> https://twitter.com/dramapotatoe/status/1193698504163479552  
> https://img.youtube.com/vi/9l1sq1tZ3tY/0.jpg


	210. He's singing for me

* * *

”Zhan-Zhan!” Qian Feng called out when he saw the familiar smiling face enter the dressing room backstage.

”Feng-ge!” Zhan rushed forward and embraced the happy man. “So nice to see you again.”

”How’ve you been? You look so fresh...you’re almost glowing!”

”I...uh...I rested really well...last night,” Zhan cleared his throat and blushed.

”Coming to think of it,” Qian Feng smirked, “Yibo’s been glowing since he got here this morning too…”

”Feng-ge!” Zhan giggled and shook his head. “Where is he by the way?”

”He should be here soon...he’s running through the light and sound check for his performance. Come, sit here...chat with us too...your precious Bo-di will be here soon.”

Zhan blushed and took the seat that Qian Feng was patting beside him.

”So, how’s it going?” Qian Feng patted his back. “You’ve been busy...and your career has just taken off like crazy...how are you coping?”

”I’ve been lucky...everything is happening so fast...but I’m grateful,” Zhan sighed. “And it helps having Yibo by my side through this...he’s so...supportive.”

”It must be difficult...but congratulations...you deserve every bit of your success...and congratulations on the new house!”

”Thank you!” Zhan beamed. 

”Zhan-ge!” An excited voice interrupted their conversation. “You’re here…,” a visibly pumped up Yibo joined them. 

Yibo looked around and bent down, swooping in with a smirk. Realizing what he intended on doing, Zhan’s eyes widened and he ducked.

”Yibo! Are you even human?!” Zhan exclaimed and pushed Yibo away, looking around frantically.

Yibo and Qian Feng chuckled at the flustered man.

”I need to go change, ge...you’ll be watching from here?”

”Yeah. I wish I could sit with Han-ge and the rest but there are going to be too many cameras there...I’ll just watch on the screen here,” Zhan shrugged.

With a nod, Yibo followed Qian Feng and Zhan made himself comfortable.

When the event began, Yibo joined the other hosts on stage, his prompts in hand. At first he looked uncomfortable but everyone around him put him at ease and soon he found his groove.

_His smile is the most beautiful, brightest thing I have ever seen. It’s a good thing he doesn’t do it too often in public otherwise everyone would fall in love with him!_

__

Halfway through, Wang Han entered the room and brightened up on seeing Zhan inside.

__

”Zhan-Zhan! Come here!” Wang Han pulled him into a warm hug that Zhan leaned into happily.

__

”No wonder Yibo is doing so well on stage! He knows his Zhan-ge is watching,” Wang Han smirked.

__

”He’s doing amazing! Despite what he thinks, he is so good at anchoring and hosting...all thanks to his time with you all on TTXS.”

__

”He has improved a lot,” Wang Han nodded and then took a seat.

__

A few minutes later, Yibo left the stage, presumably to get ready for his performance. Zhan and Wang Han chatted as the rest of the event unfolded. Soon, a staff member knocked and entered the room and requested Zhan to follow her.

__

”It’s almost time for your performance, Xiao Zhan,” she announced. “Please come with me to take your spot...we need to get you ready.”

__

Zhan nodded and bowed to Wang Han and then followed the short woman. He was taken to the side of the stage just as Yibo’s performance began. He was ushered to a spot from where he luckily had a good view of the stage and the big screen where he could watch Yibo’s dance.

__

He was joined by Yibo’s bodyguard who smiled at him and shielded him from the fans behind them.

__

”Hello,” the guard addressed Zhan, “Yibo asked me to…”

__

”Protect me,” Zhan chuckled. "I have my own guard too now...I think he thinks I'm more famous than I actually am!"

__

Both bodyguards laughed along with the amused Zhan.

__

Zhan shook his head and then proceeded to watch the remaining performance. He was in awe of how Yibo’s body moved.

__

_He has so much control over his body! And he’s so flexible. I want to try some new positions with him._ Zhan smirked inwardly. _He’s so beautiful. And all mine. He’s so talented. So fucking good at everything he does._

__

”Xiao Zhan,” a staff member came in front of him. “We need to go to your stage position...Wang Yibo’s dance is almost done.”

__

Zhan walked behind them as Yibo wrapped up his dance. As he walked to the spot, he noticed Yibo still on stage. He watched him from the corner of his eyes, careful not to make it too obvious.

__

It seemed like Yibo was looking for something, maybe the hat he threw midway through the performance or maybe he was lost and didn't know which way to exit the stage.

__

But all those explanations were erased when Zhan noticed Yibo looking in his direction blatantly. He froze when he caught a glimpse of a subtle wave that Yibo sent in his direction.

__

_That brat! He still found a way to interact with me on stage despite what we had decided earlier today!_ Zhan rolled his eyes even as a bright smile spread across his face.

__

Yibo licked his lips and smirked as he saw Zhan notice him. He finished his fake lost walk and turned around just as a staff member rushed to escort him off stage.

__

_All the best, Zhan-ge...this stupid stunt was totally worth it._ Yibo chuckled to himself.

__

He walked off stage and joined Qian Feng, Wang Han and the other hosts backstage. With a long exhale, he finally relaxed on the couch, still riding the high of his amazingly successful performance.

__

”That was the best performance I’ve seen of yours,” Wang Han patted Yibo’s thigh proudly.

__

”Thank you, Han-ge,” Yibo smiled, “I feel good about it…”

__

”You did well, Yibo!” Qian Feng exclaimed. “We’re so proud!!”

__

”It’s Zhan-ge’s turn now!” Yibo sat up eagerly. “Do you know this song...it’s Stefanie Sun’s Best days of my youth…”

__

”Oh...that’s such a romantic song,” Qian Feng tilted his head and looked at Yibo smugly.

__

”Hmm,” Yibo smiled shyly.

__

”Is that for you?” Qian Feng grinned.

__

”Yes,” Yibo blushed but stated with pride and joy. “He’s singing it for me.”

__

”Well then,” Qian Feng smiled affectionately, “I’ll let you watch it in peace...without any disturbance!”

__

”Feng-ge!” Yibo laughed and sat back in anticipation.

__

He looked around with a sigh, readying himself for Zhan’s song. Suddenly, he spotted some fans off to his right that caught his eye due to a bright headband worn by one of them.

__

_WangXiao?!_ Yibo looked up from his phone and noticed the words on a fan’s headband. _Our fans really are crazy about us._

__

He chuckled and smiled at the fan before diverting his attention to Zhan’s upcoming performance.

__

”Everyone put your hands together...for the one and only Xiao Zhan!!” The hosts announced.

__

_I wish that was me out there...announcing Zhan-ge’s performance at the top of my voice. Letting everyone see how proud I am of him._

__

When the lights came on and Zhan emerged on stage, Yibo felt his breath catch and his heart flutter.

__

_He looks so beautiful. And that smile. If looks could kill, we’d all be dead right now._

__

The entire stadium roared with cheers and applause as Zhan broke into a bright smile.

__

_That’s my man._ Yibo smiled just as brightly. _All mine._

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've taken some liberties with the order of events (and added some of my own) since we're not sure about them but here are the links for the bjyx moments and fan cams and analysis of each moment.
> 
> Yibo performance full HD -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8C_BwTmo9UA
> 
> Yibo’s performance and XZ waiting side stage for his turn next -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5UFdpLznI0
> 
> BTS moment when Qian Feng and Yibo talk and some one lip read it as Yibo saying that the song XZ was singing was for him, and Yibo smiling at WangXiao fan -  
> https://twitter.com/npcturtle/status/1231284032270290945
> 
> XZ watching Yibo’s performance backstage -  
> https://twitter.com/SenoritaXX1/status/1193680334971228160  
> https://twitter.com/dZcheeZe/status/1194421352737886209


	211. Am I interrupting something?

* * *

Zhan took in a deep breath as the audience chanted Yibo’s name. He grinned to himself and shook his head.

_I wish I could join them in cheering for him._ Zhan readied his mic for his performance. _I would cheer the longest and loudest._

”Everyone put your hands together...for the one and only Xiao Zhan!!” The hosts announced.

Zhan looked up and smiled as the audience roared and cheered for him next. 

_I still can't believe the Untamed has brought me to this point in my career._ Zhan looked around at the sea of red that held signs with his name everywhere.

He began singing, his entire body felt warm and he imagined Yibo in front of him as he let the words flow.

_The best days of my youth are all about you  
No matter how far, I will follow you  
If the pelting rain did not bear witness to our snuggles by the sea  
How could our clothes get drenched_

His mind went over all their time together - memories of them on the beaches of Greece, walking hand in hand freely, memories of them growing closer and closer over the Untamed summer - everything flooded him as the song’s words took over.

_The best days of my youth are all about you  
There isn't a moment when I don't miss you  
Even if I could, at the right moment, encounter you who is right for me  
How can I return to the days of youth gone by?_

Just then, Zhan’s attention was caught by a bright yellow sign that shone alone amidst the sea of red.

_’Zhan-ge, didi ai ni’_

Zhan couldn't help the blush that immediately spread across his face. He smiled wide at the sign that made his heart leap with joy. He kept looking in its direction, admiring the words that were like a soft balm to his heart.

_Please...please remember that there is someone waiting for you at the edge of the world  
No matter how fierce the wind, I will not surrender, willingly for you  
Until the moment I can truly protect your heart  
Even if you don't understand this, it won't be in vain  
Please...please remember that there is someone waiting for you at the edge of the world  
No matter how far the journey, please do come back… _

__

Zhan found himself turning back to see the yellow sign over and over again throughout the song. And each time, the blush returned. His eyes lit up every time he read the words that Yibo had uttered in jest during their shooting.

__

_Who knows? Maybe he wasn't entirely joking then._

__

* * *

__

Yibo sat in the dressing room, watching Zhan’s performance with a radiant smile. As the cameras panned about, he noticed the yellow sign too.

__

_Zhan-ge, didi ai ni!?_ Yibo read with surprise. _I can't believe they released all those behind the scenes footage! Everyone has so much content on us to analyse! No wonder the cp fans go crazy. Who wouldn't with all that evidence out there. Only an idiot would still be blind to our affections for each other._

__

When Zhan’s performance was done, some of the hosts interviewed him on stage.

__

_I wish I could be there on stage beside him, asking him questions, teasing him. I wonder why Han-ge thinks it’s better if we reduce our interactions a bit. The ratings for this gala would be off the charts if we were on stage together right now. But if Zhan-ge thinks he’s right, I’m going to go with his judgement._

__

Yibo smiled fondly as Zhan answered all the questions cutely, acting out his responses to the situations they were giving him. Once the segment was done, it was his turn to return to stage with the rest of the hosts and wrap up the show.

__

As they said their goodbyes, all the brothers pulled him into a hug and he obliged shyly. Qian Feng patted his back and whispered in his ear before pulling back.

__

”Are you both going to be coming to the afterparty?”

__

”Umm...I didn't know there was one…”

__

”It’s a big deal...but you two...can’t come together I would think...but of course you don't have to stay away from each other either,” Qian Feng smiled kindly.

__

”Oh,” Yibo tried hiding his dejection, “yeah...I’ll try and stop by...I’m not sure about Zhan-ge…”

__

”I’ll make your Zhan-ge come too,” Qian Feng chuckled and wrapped one arm around his shoulder. “Let’s go!”

__

* * *

__

Yibo walked beside Wang Han and Qian Feng as they entered the party.

__

> __
> 
> _Zhan-ge: I’ll join you guys in some time...have a call with the lawyers right now, okay?  
>    
>  Yibo: Okay, ge...your performance was so so so good!!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yours was better, didi _😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: No! I loved your song...and your smile...and your cheeks…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Bo-di! Are we starting again?  
>    
>  Yibo: Come soon_😘 
> 
> __

_  
_

Yibo put his phone away and smiled. 

__

”Do you want a drink?” Qian Feng nudged Yibo out of his reverie. 

__

”Hmm...okay,” Yibo nodded. “What do you want, ge? I can get the drinks for both of us.”

__

”I’ll just have a beer,” Qian Feng shrugged. 

__

With another nod, Yibo took off in the direction of the bar.

__

”Two beers, please,” he leaned forward on the bar top and gestured to the bartender.

__

”It will take a few minutes, sir...we just ran out of beer but a staff member is on his way with more.”

__

”No problem,” Yibo smiled and took a seat at the bar.

__

> __
> 
> _Yibo: Hope the call with the lawyer is going well  
>    
>  Yibo: How much longer do you think you’ll take?  
>    
>  Yibo: I don't think I want to stay here too long  
>    
>  Yibo: I want to go home and cuddle!_ 😋 
> 
> __

__  


”Wang Yibo?” A voice lifted Yibo’s attention from his phone.

__

Yibo looked up, confused at the stranger who was approaching him at the bar.

__

”Yes?” Yibo put his phone aside and stood up out of politeness.

__

”Hello, I’m Li Jun,” the man beamed and extended his arm out for a handshake.

__

Yibo couldn't place him but, ever the polite man, bowed and shook his hand. The man who called himself Li Jun seemed to be older than him but probably still in his twenties. He was well built and just a tad taller than Yibo himself. He held Yibo’s hand firmly and introduced himself.

__

”I’m head of marketing for your skateboard brand campaign…,” he bowed and kept shaking Yibo’s hand.

__

”Oh, hello,” Yibo awkwardly extracted his hand from Li Jun’s slowly. “Nice to finally meet you.”

__

”It’s my honor,” the man stood a little too close for Yibo’s comfort. “It’s a pity we haven't been able to launch your brand yet...but I guess you’ve been very busy…”

__

”From what I remember, the designs haven’t been approved yet,” Yibo plastered on his trademark poker face.

__

”Oh, yes! The designs you sent over that were designed by some friend of yours?” The man laughed pretentiously. “They don't meld with your image..your cool, handsome guy image,” he nudged Yibo. “We were thinking of using our in-house design team instead. But we haven't heard back from your team yet.”

__

”That’s probably because,” Yibo took a step back to reduce his discomfort at their proximity, “my team knows I want to use the designs made by my friend...who is also a professional designer. I think they fit my image perfectly.”

__

”We should discuss this further over a drink or dinner some time.” The man smiled and patted Yibo’s shoulder.

__

Yibo swallowed his irritation at the man’s excess touchiness.

__

”How about I take you out tonight? We could head somewhere nice after this party? I know a great place where we could get some...privacy...to discuss this.” The man squeezed his shoulder as he took another sip of his wine and Yibo could see the oily smile he was flashing. 

__

Something in the pit of Yibo’s stomach churned and he was about to take another step away when the man seemed to glance over Yibo’s shoulder.

__

”Hello, Wang Yibo,” A deep, low voice spoke from behind Yibo. “Am I interrupting something?”

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: there is no evidence that Yibo saw the same sign that XZ did. I just made that up.
> 
> XZ’s performance and stage time -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JOUlZU87q4g&t=285s
> 
> XZ seeing the the zhan-ge dd ai ni sign and reacting and other yizhan/bjyx sweetness -  
> https://youtu.be/JLq13TFv9sE?t=150
> 
> XZ and Yibo same 520 hand gesture?  
> https://twitter.com/SenoritaXX1/status/1194224081735802881
> 
> Yibo-XZ indirect interactions and fancam footage of yizhan/bjyx moments -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3V2djkcz-U&t=256s  
> https://twitter.com/kaowiichan/status/1194328522254422018 
> 
> Refer to chapter 128 where I mention the skateboard thing. This skateboard brand announced itself in July 2019 and most people were convinced it's Yibo but there is still no update about it. I am just going to use this for a subplot -  
> https://www.instagram.com/mm_____official/


	212. It'll take some time

* * *

”Hello, Wang Yibo,” A deep, low voice spoke from behind Yibo. “Am I interrupting something?”

Yibo recognized the voice immediately and was part relieved and part nervous when he saw Zhan standing behind him.

”N...no,” Yibo gulped when he saw the intensity in Zhan’s eyes.

_Fuck. He’s angry._

It was only then that Zhan realized that Li Jun’s hand was still resting on Yibo's shoulder. As if stung by a bee, Yibo immediately took a step towards the bar, letting the hand drop away. He scratched the back of his neck and cleared his throat.

”Zhan-ge...,” Yibo began, a little flustered and uncertain about what Zhan’s reaction was going to be.

”Hello,” Zhan ignored Yibo and walked towards the man, putting himself between him and Yibo. “I am Xiao Zhan...and you are?”

Li Jun, after a moment of hesitation where his face wore an expression of confusion as if he couldn't read Zhan, schooled his face and smiled formally.

”Hello Xiao Zhan...no need to introduce yourself...who doesn’t know you? I am Li Jun, I am Yibo’s close colleague.”

”That’s funny,” Zhan gave Li Jun a curt side smirk, “He's never mentioned you before.”

Li Jun’s smile faltered for a brief moment.

”He works for the company that we will be collaborating with for my skateboard brand…,” Yibo interjected in an attempt to dissipate some tension. “He was just talking to me about how we need to move forward with some of the design decisions if we want to ever launch the skateboards,” Yibo feigned a chuckle.

”Ahh,” Zhan raised his eyebrows. “I see.”

A tense silence followed which was soon interrupted by the bartender.

”Your beers, sir,” he addressed Yibo. “Would you like anything?” He turned his attention to Zhan who was still staring at a now very uncomfortable Li Jun.

”I’ll have a scotch on the rocks,” Zhan gave a brief nod to the bartender, his eyes still fixed on the visibly fidgeting man.

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo bit his lips as he grabbed both beers. “Wang Han….Han-ge wanted to talk to you,” he made up an excuse, “...we should...go find him…”

”I heard you want to take Yibo out for dinner....some place private?” Zhan ignored Yibo once again, “...for work?”

”Oh,” Li Jun laughed nervously. “I...I was just...I meant…”

”That doesn’t sound very professional now does it Mr. Li Jun,” Zhan’s words had a bite to them. “If I didn't know better….I would think you were being...pardon my bluntness...sleazy.”

”What?!” Li Jun’s eyes widened as they heard a low gasp from Yibo who’s breath hitched.

Zhan smiled in a controlled and authoritative way, as he picked up his drink and took a sip.

”I...I…,” Li Jun flustered and they could see him begin to sweat. “Of course...not...I...I…”

”Of course you would never do such a thing, now would you, Mr. Li?” Zhan’s tone turned smooth and dripping with overt sweetness. “I was just pointing out that it would appear that way to someone else…”

Li Jun swallowed anxiously and glanced around, jittery and flushed.

”Of course not…,” he chuckled loudly in an attempt to mask his shaky voice, “I would never…”

”That’s what I thought,” Zhan smiled with his lips pressed together tightly and bowed, “now if you’ll excuse us, we have other matters to attend to.”

Li Jun bowed back, sweat dripping down his temple from being called out so blatantly yet discreetly by Zhan.

”It was nice meeting you, Xiao Zhan...and you, Wang Yibo,” he mumbled as he straightened up again.

”Same here,” Yibo resumed his poker face, “my team will get in touch with your company soon. And as I mentioned, we will use the designs I have selected that were made by my friend.”

”It was nice talking with you,” Zhan raised his glass to Li Jun. “Here’s to professionalism and a fruitful collaboration with Wang Yibo which I am sure would do wonders for your little company. Hope he sees it through.”

With another bow, Zhan turned around and walked away, followed hastily by Yibo who finally let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding.

* * *

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo mumbled as he trailed behind Zhan.

Zhan didn't respond and made his way through the crowd of people with quick, long strides, Yibo had to nearly break out into a jog to keep up with Zhan. A few seconds later, he looked about him and realized Zhan was heading away from the party.

Pretty soon, Zhan was leading them down an empty corridor.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo tried again but stopped when he saw Zhan clench his teeth.

Zhan turned the corner and Yibo bit his lips when he pushed through a door and entered into a private restroom. As soon as the door closed behind Yibo, Zhan stepped into his personal space, pressing him against the door.

”Zha...Zhan-ge…,” Yibo gulped and looked down, unable to meet Zhan’s intense stare.

Zhan trailed one finger down Yibo’s jawline and paused at his chin. He lifted Yibo’s face up until his eyes met him once more. Yibo’s lips trembled as Zhan leaned closer and ran his thumb across Yibo’s lips.

”I...I…Zhan-ge, I...”

”I won't let anything bad happen to you...ever,” Zhan whispered and closed the gap between them.

He took Yibo’s lips in his and kissed them gently. Yibo whimpered softly when Zhan’s other hand slipped around him and groped his ass firmly. Yibo moaned as Zhan deepened the kiss and rolled his hips into him.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo sighed as Zhan moved his hand from Yibo’s chin to the back of Yibo’s neck.

Zhan pulled him closer by his neck and pushed his tongue deeper into him, engulfing every inch of Yibo’s lips.

Just then, there was a knock on the door. Zhan pulled back and let out a low huff of displeasure.

”This restroom is occupied,” he cocked his head towards the door and stated loud enough for the person outside to hear.

”And it’ll take some time…,” Zhan looked at Yibo with a soft smile and rubbed their noses together.

”Oh, alright…,” the man outside replied and they heard footsteps walk away.

Zhan rested his forehead against Yibo’s and let out a small chuckle. Yibo grinned and kissed Zhan’s nose and laughed along with him.

”You okay?” Zhan whispered.

”Hmm...you?” Yibo placed a hand on Zhan’s cheek.

”Sorry if I said too much...kinda got very angry at that disgusting…”

Yibo leaned in closer and sealed their lips together. Zhan smiled into the kiss and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s waist. They kissed for several seconds, melting into each other, seeking comfort and pleasure.

”That was hot,” Yibo rested his head back against the door and sighed. “But yeah…he was disgusting...I feel icky,” he gave a small pout.

”Come on,” Zhan intertwined their fingers. “Let’s go home. I’ll make you feel better.” 

”Mmm,” Yibo moaned softly as Zhan enveloped his lips once again. “Let’s go home,” he murmured. “I want to cuddle.”


	213. Lots and lots of vinegar

* * *

> _Bo-di: How’s the shoot going, ge?  
>    
>  Zhan: Fine...tiring...but I’ll be back in two more weeks  
>    
>  Bo-di: Miss you_ 😔 _  
>   
>  Zhan: I miss you too, didi_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Really?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Of course, didi  
>    
>  Bo-di: How much?  
>    
>  Zhan: So much that I want to catch the next flight back  
>    
>  Bo-di: I wish you could  
>    
>  Zhan: I wish I could too, sweetie_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Okay, shot’s ready...I have to go now  
>    
>  Zhan: Love you_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Love you more, ge  
>    
>  Zhan: Not possible _

* * *

”I’m so excited for you to meet Na-jie!” Zhan bubbled with enthusiasm as they made their way up the elevator to Na Ying’s home.

”Who else is gonna be there?” Yibo smiled and left Zhan’s hand reluctantly when the elevator door opened at the topmost floor.

”I think Ayunga and Zheng Yunlong should be there as well...maybe some of the others from Our song...Kai-di…”

”Who’s Kai-di?” Yibo raised an eyebrow.

"Wang Linkai...he’s a member of Nine percent? He’s a rapper in fact!” Zhan’s face lit up. “He’s so funny...and eccentric...but very cool. You’ll like him. His stage name is Lil Ghost,” Zhan chuckled and shook his head.

”Hmm,” Yibo pursed his lips. “You call him Kai-di?”

”Actually, he’s the youngest one on the show...you know how it is...he’s everyone’s didi,” Zhan smiled fondly.

”Is he your didi?” Yibo frowned.

”He’s not _mine_ , Yibo!” Zhan guffawed. “He’s just a didi.”

”I don't like you calling him didi,” Yibo’s frown grew as they Zhan knocked on the door and waited.

”Didi! So possessive,” Zhan rolled his eyes.

Before Yibo could respond, the door opened and a bright face greeted them.

”Zhan-Zhan!” Na Ying exclaimed and opened her arms wide.

”Na-jie!!” Zhan rushed into her arms and embraced her.

Yibo’s face softened at the affection between the two and he smiled.

”And I’d like to officially introduce you to my boyfriend, Na-jie!” Zhan gestured towards Yibo who raised his eyebrows in surprise.

”A-Bo!” She walked past Zhan and pulled a stunned Yibo into a hug.

”Hel...hello, Na-jie,” Yibo stuttered still reeling from the shock but when Zhan smiled at him reassuringly, he relaxed and hugged her back.

”It’s so good to see you here!” She led them in by their hands.

”A-Zhan!” Ayunga walked towards them with a bright smile on his face. “Yibo! Glad you could make it, Mr. Busy-bee!”

Yibo frowned and moved closer to Zhan, firmly holding onto his hand. Zhan suppressed an amused grin and rolled his eyes internally. Ayunga, however, noticed the subtle action and laughed.

”I gather that you have seen the posts on Weibo?” Ayunga grinned.

”What posts?” Zhan asked, confused.

”Of you and me...when we caught the flight together...and some footage of us from Our song…,” Ayunga replied.

”What’s the big deal in that?” Xiao Zhan still looked confused.

”Some people ship us,” Ayunga smirked.

”What?!?!” Xiao Zhan burst into laughter and let go of Yibo’s hand. 

He covered his mouth in an attempt to control his laughter but in vain.

”Yibo! Did you know about this?”

Yibo looked embarrassed when he nodded. He caught hold of Zhan’s hand once again.

”Oh my god!” Zhan smacked his forehead.

”Don't worry,” Ayunga waved his hand in dismissal, “I had to face the same thing,” he chuckled and glanced over his shoulder at Zheng Yunlong, who sure enough was staring at them.

When Zhan glanced over at him as well, Zheng Yunlog seemed flustered and plastered a smile on his face. He stood up and walked over to the trio and bowed.

”Sorry,” Zhan bit his lower lip to suppress a smile.

”Umm, sorry? For what?” Zheng Yunlong cocked his head to the side.

”For you know,” he wiggled his eyebrows in the direction of Ayunga, “the whole ship thing,” and with that Zhan and Ayunga burst into a cackle.

”Is there a ship name?” Zhan asked Ayunga, now thoroughly devolving into a fit of laughter.

”I don't know...Ga-zhan?” Ayunga raised his hand up for a high five.

”Oh! Oh! Zhan-ga?” Zhan giggled and clapped his hands against Ayunga’s loudly.

”You two are having way too much fun with his,” Zheng Yunlong frowned and smacked Ayunga’s arm.

”Yeah,” Yibo smacked Zhan’s arm as well. “It’s not funny.”

”Ow! Bo-di!” Zhan smacked Yibo back. 

A back and forth of slaps and pinches followed much to the amusement of Ayunga and Zheng Yunlong.

”What is going on here?!” Na Ying appeared out of nowhere, hands on her hips, a mock stern look on her face. ”Are you two fighting again!?” 

”No Na-jie! He started it first,” Zhan smirked and tattled.

”I....I…,” Yibo blushed in embarrassment.

”Come on, you two! Zhan-Zhan...you’re older! Anyway, dinner is ready...let’s go!”

”Hope you have a ton of vinegar Na-jie...Yibo likes vinegar in his food,” Zhan smirked. “Lots and lots of vinegar.” He winked at Yibo.

Before Yibo could defend himself, the doorbell rang and when Na Ying opened it, it was Wang Linkai. His eyes lit up when he saw the rest of the group and he walked hastily towards them after hugging Na Ying.

”Ga-ge!” He gave Ayunga a side hug. “Zhan-ge!!” He rushed and wrapped his arms around Zhan.

”Didi!” Zhan laughed at the squealing boy. “So good to see you.”

Yibo clenched his teeth and cleared his throat.

”Wang Yibo, wow.” LinKai gushed. “It’s so cool to finally meet you. I’m a huge fan.”

Yibo’s jaw unclenched just a tad at the praise but tightened again when he saw LinKai intertwine his arms with Zhan.

”Come on, gege,” he yanked Zhan with him. “I’m famished.”

Zhan curled his lips inwards and looked back at Yibo with an apologetic yet mischievous smile.

Yibo felt anger and irritation spread through his body as he watched LinKai grab a seat beside Zhan. He strode towards the dining table and stood between their chairs.

”Hey, bro,” he addressed LinKai as casually as possible. “Mind if I sit here? Next to my boyfriend?”

Zhan froze at the unexpected declaration. His mind raced as he stared at LinKai and then Na Ying. He balled his fists under the table, gripping his napkin.

”Of...of course,” LinKai smiled nervously and scooted over one seat.

”Thanks,” Yibo nodded and took the seat beside Zhan.

He reached for Zhan’s hand under the table but Zhan smacked his hand away, much to Yibo’s surprise.

”Come on,” Na Ying chuckled and broke the tension in the air, “let’s begin…”

”Everything looks so delicious, Na-jie,” Ayunga chimed in.

As everyone began eating, Yibo glanced at Zhan several times but Zhan’s eyes remained fixed on his plate. Eventually the conversation flowed and everyone was having a good time, except Zhan and Yibo. When dinner was done, everyone moved to the living room. Zhan went up to Na Ying and smiled apologetically.

”Na-jie,” Zhan began, “We need to leave...I have an early morning tomorrow.”

”Oh, that’s a pity,” Na Ying sighed. “It’s okay,” she placed a hand on his cheek. “I’ll see you at the shoot in a few days.”

”Thanks, Na-jie...goodnight.”

With another bow, both Zhan and Yibo took their leave and made their way to their car. Once inside, Yibo turned to Zhan.

”Zhan-ge, are you angry at me?” 

”Let’s talk about this when we get home.”

"But, ge...," Yibo protested.

"I said," Zhan turned to face Yibo with fire in his eyes, "let's talk about this when we get home."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayunga and XZ hugging at new years while Zheng Yunlong looks at them lol -  
> https://youtu.be/aUcilPyRIQU?t=5  
> And the second hug -  
> https://youtu.be/aUcilPyRIQU?t=179
> 
> And XZ grabbing Ayunga when he slipped on the stage -  
> https://twitter.com/nahz_oaix/status/1257144202749603840
> 
> Ayunga teaching XZ a Mongolian dance -  
> https://twitter.com/XDAYTOYZ/status/1221804603924041729
> 
> Ayunga and XZ took the same flight once -  
> https://twitter.com/rischassie/status/1216998140642983937  
> https://twitter.com/AnnieTabinas/status/1216948900952772613
> 
> I’ve seen a small fraction of people ship Ayunga and XZ but it never caught on. Most people just see their friendship, including me. And not every friendship is a cp! Just using this for this sub plot.  
> https://twitter.com/Lanbojier/status/1216888345915248641
> 
> Here’s some Yizhan content to shake off the Ayunga/LinKai/XZ content LOL -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OanGpLztbQQ
> 
> Also, there wasn’t any real gg-dd interaction between Wang Linkai and Xiao Zhan in Our Song but since he was the youngest on the Our Song set, I am using him for this sub-plot! 😈


	214. What happened

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two notes -
> 
> 1\. Just my two cents on the chapter with the sleazeball Li Jun - my way of thinking about Zhan's behaviour was that he was being protective not possessive. Just thought I'd share my mindset about it.
> 
> 2\. I love bringing conflict into the story only so I can see everyone's opinion, people taking sides, discussing who's right and who's wrong. Haha! Keep 'em comments coming!

* * *

As soon as they entered the house, Yibo closed the door behind him and caught Zhan by the wrist.

”What happened, ge? Why are you so angry?”

Zhan yanked his wrist out of Yibo’s grip and turned to him with glaring eyes.

”What happened?! Do you really not know what happened...what you did!?”

”No,” Yibo looked bewildered. “What did I do!?”

”I can't believe you, Yibo!!” Zhan threw his arms in the air in frustration. “Wow...you really have no clue!”

”Then tell me!” Yibo walked closer to Zhan only for Zhan to take a few steps away.

”You outed us in front of someone neither of us know well enough!!!” Zhan exclaimed loudly, causing Yibo to flinch.

”I...I thought you’re close to him…,” Yibo mumbled.

”Just because I know him and joke around with him doesn’t mean we are close or we know each other well enough to share such sensitive information about our private lives, Yibo!” Zhan snapped.

”Just know him?!” Yibo responded in an irritated tone. “It didn't look like you _just_ knew him! He called you gege….you called him didi...he fucking hugged you and intertwined your arms like you were best friends!!”

”We are different people, Yibo! While hugging may seem like a big deal to you, it isn't for me! I have always been a hugger! And are you kidding me?! He’s just a child, Yibo! He’s barely 20!!” Zhan looked at him in disbelief. “Are you really that jealous?!”

”And I was 21 when we started dating!!” Yibo raised his eyebrows at Zhan in challenge. 

”It’s not the same!” Zhan rubbed his forehead in exasperation. ”What is with you!?”

”You knew how uncomfortable I was with you calling him didi...I even said so...and then with the whole Ayunga thing…and still you joked about it with them...and laughed about the shipping…”

”Because it _is_ funny...it’s funny because we are just friends...it’s funny because no one knows we’re seeing other men and it’s funny because it’s so far from the truth!!” Zhan placed his hands on his temple helplessly.

”But it made me uncomfortable...you should have respected that and stopped joking about it!”

”You were not uncomfortable...you were jealous...and possessive...so fucking possessive in fact that you were acting like a petulant child!” Zhan grit his teeth and took a step towards Yibo.

”I am not a child!” Yibo took a step towards Zhan as well in defiance.

”Then stop acting like one! Your behaviour was so petty! And what makes it worse was it wasn't in the privacy of just our friend circle! This was a dinner party at someone else’s house. A senior in the industry! My colleague! And you embarrassed me! In front of everyone and…,” Zhan ranted on.

”So now I embarrass you?!” Yibo’s voice grew louder as well. “Are my feelings embarrassing?!”

”That’s not what I mean and you know it!! Stop twisting my words.” Zhan groaned and turned his back on Yibo. “You couldn't control your jealousy for a few hours?! If I did something wrong, we could talk about it after the party. Privately. Not make a scene in front of everyone!!” He leaned against the dining table.

”How was _that_ making a scene?!” Yibo yelled back. “All I did was ask for the seat beside you!”

”That was NOT what you did,” Zhan clenched his teeth and fist. “You were staking your claim!!! Why the fuck did you announce that I am your boyfriend just to get a seat?!?”

Yibo remained silent.

”I’ll tell you why!!” Zhan slammed his fist into the table. “Because you wanted him to know I’m yours...you wanted to tell him to back off...that was your way of dealing with your jealousy!!”

”So what if that’s why I did it?! So what if I wanted to tell him to back off?! How is that wrong. You _are_ my boyfriend! Why can't I say that!??!” Yibo frowned and exclaimed.

”YOU KNOW WHY!!!” Zhan thundered. “Because it’s not safe to go around telling anyone and everyone! We need to know who to trust with our truth. We can't just be careless like you were today. This is how rumors spread. This is how things become an open secret in the industry!!!! And we can't take that risk!!”

”Everyone else in that room knew!! Na-jie….Ayunga and Yunlong...they all know!!”

”But not LinKai!! He doesn’t! I didn't want him to know. We are not close! I wasn't ready to come out to someone I barely know!!”

”Did you not want him to know because you’re not close or because of some other reason?” Yibo’s voice grew quiet.

Zhan’s eyes widened and his jaw dropped.

”Are you for real? Are you fucking kidding me?! How can you still be so insecure after over a year together?! It’s not cute anymore, Yibo! Do you not trust me?!”

”I’m sorry…,” Yibo shook his head, immediately regretting his words. “I didn't...I didn't mean that...I was just...it was a moment of anger…I didn't mean to imply…”

”A moment of anger! Just like back at the party. An impulsive moment of jealousy! You risked our relationship for petty jealousy! Do you have no self control!? If something was bothering you...if I did something to upset you...you should have waited till we were alone and discussed it with me now instead of making everyone uncomfortable at dinner. It was so obvious what you were doing. What must Na-jie think...that my boyfriend is…”

”I don't care what others think!” Yibo interrupted Zhan abruptly. “I don't give a fuck…”

”But I do!!” Zhan slapped the table in anger. “Not everyone is like you, Yibo!” 

Yibo looked away, having nothing to say in return.

”Do you know what could happen if he blabs to someone else...don't you know what would happen if this spreads to other people now?!” 

”Ge...I…,” Yibo swallowed his emotions as fear began rising in him.

”Of course you didn't…,” Zhan stood up once more and paced around, “because you did that in the spur of the moment! Without pausing to think about the consequence of your actions!”

”What about you?! It’s not like you haven't done this ever?!” Yibo retorted. “What about that cameraman at the Thailand fanmeet…???”

Zhan took a deep breath and composed himself.

”Although that was not my finest moment,” he spoke carefully, “I did not blatantly tell him the nature of our relationship...there was still plausible deniability!”

”That’s not the point, ge! You have been jealous too and you have acted on impulse too!”

”I have never given anyone concrete proof of our relationship, Yibo!!! _That_ is the point! _That_ is why I am angry!! No one can say Xiao Zhan is dating Wang Yibo! At the most what they can say is that we are close or that I am protective! But now...people can say Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan are in a relationship!!!”

Silence hung heavy between them as Yibo processed Zhan’s words.

”I don't like someone else touching you the way I would...or calling you gege...or you calling someone didi...the way you call me…,” Yibo finally broke the silence. “Call it jealousy, possessiveness, or insecurity...I don't care...that’s how I feel…,” Yibo levelled his gaze on Zhan unapologetically.

”And I don't like embarrassing myself in front of my colleagues and being rude to them. Call me a people-pleaser, too nice for my own good or whatever...that’s how I am…,” Zhan returned Yibo’s stare obstinately.

”So what now?” Yibo resumed his poker face and didn't budge.

”Looks like we’re at a crossroads...,” Zhan frowned and crossed his arms across his chest. "The real question is...which direction do each of us want to go in..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Side note -   
> There are several videos of XZ out there hugging all his friends except Yibo of course because they have to be careful in public ;)


	215. Where is all this coming from?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FIRSTLY, XIAO ZHAN HAS APPEARED IN PERSON AND GIVEN US A WHOLE ASS INTERVIEW!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I have a whole ass thread with translations and more info on my Twitter - [@jalpari_yizhan](https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/)
> 
> SECONDLY....WOW. 😲😲😲😲😲😲 All y'alls comments. WOW.
> 
> I love seeing everyone's opinions and discussions on what's right and wrong! Just a gentle reminder, to be kind to each other always! Glad everyone is so invested in my story and enjoying the chapters! As Xiao Zhan says, always focus on yourself, your life, your work first and we'll all move forward together, getting better every day!
> 
> Happy reading! ❤️❤️❤️

* * *

”So what now?” Yibo resumed his poker face and didn't budge.

”Looks like we’re at a crossroads...,” Zhan frowned and crossed his arms across his chest. "The real question is...which direction do each of us want to go in..."

”I want to go in the same direction as you,” Yibo stated point blank, expression unchanged.

Zhan opened his mouth as if to say something, then closed it at a loss for words, and then opened it again. After several more seconds of fumbling, he finally let out a long grunt.

”Damn it, Yibo!” Zhan dragged a hand down his face. “How can I stay mad at you when you say things like that?!”

”But it’s the truth,” Yibo remained poker-faced and serious. “You said it...as long as we talk and communicate, we can figure anything out.”

Zhan let out a long sigh and covered his face with both hands. He let his shoulders drop and took in deep breaths to reign in his anger and frustration.

”Zhan-ge…”

Zhan dropped his hands and looked at Yibo. He could see the vulnerability through the poker face and he knew that Yibo wasn't as composed internally as he was pretending to be externally.

Zhan walked towards him with a huff and stopped a few feet away, crossing his arms across his chest. 

”What?” He cocked his head to one side and asked.

”I’m sorry,” Yibo looked down.

”For what?” Zhan sighed.

”For revealing our relationship to someone outside our circle...without discussing it with you first.”

”So you get it?” Zhan’s voice softened a tad.

Yibo nodded but kept looking down.

”I’m sorry too,” Zhan spoke gently and took another step closer to Yibo.

”For what?” Yibo looked up.

”I should have respected your feelings,” it was Zhan’s turn to look down. “I screwed up...and hurt you.”

”Even though I was just being possessive…?”

”The thing is,” Zhan looked at Yibo tiredly. “Neither of us can change completely...and neither should we have to.”

”What does that mean?”

”It means that all we can do is try to work on the things that get in our way,” Zhan shrugged. “I can't remove the possessiveness from your nature...all I can ask of you is to think before you…”

”I will...I’ll think before acting next time, ge,” Yibo finished his sentence and took a step closer to Zhan. “And I can't ask you not to be friendly with new people but…”

”There’s no other didi for me,” Zhan smiled and closed the distance between them, wrapping his arms around Yibo’s waist. “Only you.”

”Promise?” Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan as well.

”Of course...if it means so much to you, I won't call him didi...but I can call him Kai-di and I can call actual children below the age of twenty didis?” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

”Yeah,” Yibo laughed. “It sounds silly when you say it like that…”

”It’s not silly if it matters to you...I’m sorry I overreacted...it’s just that when you told him you were my boyfriend...I got so scared...I suddenly had visions of it being all over Weibo the next day and our lives just turning upside down in the blink of an eye…I thought I would lose this...us...everything...”

”I’m sorry...I know now that it was careless of me…”

”Hmm,” Zhan rested his forehead against Yibo’s, “I’m so sorry, didi...I didn't mean to make you that uncomfortable. I’ll be more careful next time too.”

Zhan sighed and stayed silent for a few seconds.

”I just wish…,” he whispered, barely audible.

”You just wish what?”

”I wish you weren’t so insecure, didi...I mean I don't like seeing you scared of losing me or hurt by other people’s presence around me. Why do you get _so_ insecure? What are you scared of?”

”I don’t want to lose you.” Yibo looked at Zhan with big innocent eyes.

”I don't either, didi,” Zhan placed a kiss on Yibo’s nose. “But why do you think you’ll lose me because of someone else? Why do you get so possessive?”

”I feel like…,” Yibo struggled to find the words, “I feel like if others come to know just how wonderful you are...if they see what I see...they’ll come for you...and the more people you interact with...the more you’ll realize there are better people out there for you.”

”Didi,” Zhan gasped and he pulled back a little to get a good look at Yibo’s face, “do you really think there is someone out there who is better for me?”

”I don't know...I haven't met everyone in the world,” Yibo shrugged.

Zhan couldn't help but chuckle a little at his honest response.

”I don't think there is any such person out there…,” Zhan replied firmly. “And even if there is someone who is better for me on paper...I don't care...I want you...I pick you.” Zhan placed a finger on Yibo’s heart.

Yibo looked at Zhan closely as if trying to decide whether to believe him or not.

”I believe in fate, Yibo. And fate led me to you. There are so many reasons why we shouldn't have even met each other….I was a designer in Chongqing...I am 6 years older than you...we have very different hobbies and very different circles...but yet somehow...everything I chose to do led me to you...and here we are.” Zhan spoke softly as he brushed aside a strand of hair from Yibo’s eyes.

Yibo felt the back of his eyes burn and well up.

”It seems to me...that the problem isn't that you’re scared I’ll find someone else...the problem is that you don't think you’re good enough. And for the life of me, I can't understand why you...Wang Yibo...would think that.”

”I...I…,” Yibo bit his lips. 

”What...tell me, sweetie...why do you feel that way?”

”I’ve just...I haven’t done so much...I never went to college like you...I didn't even have a normal schooling...I don't know and understand so many things...all I know is how to be an entertainer…and if the comments are anything to go by….sometimes I’m not even good at being that...”

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan’s eyes widened. “Where is all this coming from? Why have you never said anything about this to me before?”

”I wasn't trying to hide anything from you,” Yibo replied hastily. “I just...I’m not good enough in so many ways...and you...you are perfect...in every way.”

”Wow. Okay. There’s a lot to unpack here,” Zhan exhaled and took a step back. “Come here.”

He grabbed Yibo by the hand and walked them to the couch. He placed both hands on Yibo’s shoulders.

”Sit.” He forced him down.

”First and foremost. I am _not_ perfect. I may seem perfect to you….because you love me...but I am not. Don't put me on a pedestal. I have my flaws, weaknesses, things I don't know, things I’m not good at. And you know what they are. How can your definition of perfect be different for me than for yourself?”

”Ge, I…”

”That was a rhetorical question and I’m not done yet,” Zhan held one finger up. “Secondly, I get it now. Your life has been anything but conventional. You’ve been on a rollercoaster ride since you were thirteen. You’ve been judged, scrutinized, criticized, attacked, ridiculed, provoked for such a long time that you’ve internalized it somewhere deep inside you. And it doesn’t help that you’re such a perfectionist.”

”Ge, I…”

”Wait, didi…all I want to say is...all the hate comments by the antis, all the criticism by people who can't say anything good about anyone, all the times you have failed...they don't make you less worthy of anything. Just keep moving on, don't show them any emotion...keep getting better...that is the best response. Your self esteem needs to be stronger than them. Only then will you feel like you deserve the happiness and love in your life.”

”But ge, I…”

”Okay, what...what is it, didi?” Zhan paused his rambling. 

”What does ‘rhetorical question’ mean?” Yibo blinked innocently.

Zhan blinked twice at Yibo and then curled his lips inwards.

”It just means...I didn't expect you to actually answer my question, didi…,” Zhan spoke with great difficulty.

”Are you laughing at me?!” Yibo exclaimed.

”No…,” Zhan kept his lips pressed tightly together.

”You are!” Yibo pouted and began getting up from the couch.

”Come back here,” Zhan smiled brightly and yanked Yibo down on him and fell back on the couch.

”Let go of me, ge!!” Yibo tried to free himself from Zhan’s grip.

”Never!” Zhan laughed and tightened his arms around Yibo.

After several seconds of struggling, Yibo gave up and huffed as he remained stuck on top of Zhan. Zhan smiled and held him close.

”No matter what you think, Wang Yibo...your whole is better, kinder, sweeter, smarter, stronger than the sum of your parts. And there is nothing in this world that should make you doubt yourself. You deserve all the good things in your life. Including flawed old me.”

”You’re not flawed or old!” Yibo exclaimed in protest. “And it’s hard to believe I deserve these things sometimes…,” He muttered under his breath.

”We all feel that way sometimes, sweetie,” Zhan caressed Yibo’s cheek. “I’m sorry if my behaviour tonight somehow reinforced that feeling in you. Now that I know where this is coming from, I promise...I won't make light of it ever again.”

”I’m sure I’ll...I’ll try...with time...that this feeling reduces...I don't want to feel this way...it’s suffocating sometimes…”

”I’m sure it is,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s cheek. “But now you can talk to me about it and I’ll be there for you...in whatever way you need.”

”Hmm,” Yibo rested his chin on Zhan’s chest.

”What are you thinking?” 

”That I need to hear this everyday to keep my self esteem up…,” Yibo smirked.

”Brat!” Zhan smacked Yibo’s ass lightly. “You just want to be praised everyday!” 

”Ow! Yibo pouted playfully. “Zhan-ge! It’s your responsibility to keep my self esteem up!!”

”No...but it is my responsibility to keep something else up,” Zhan grinned and squeezed Yibo’s ass.

”Oh yeah?” Yibo wiggled his eyebrows and grinned back.

”Yeah,” Zhan replied before flipping them over in one swift motion.

Yibo yelped and landed on the couch laughing wholeheartedly. Zhan smiled fondly at the radiant laugh and gazed at Yibo lovingly.

_His laugh is all I need to keep pushing forward. His laugh makes it all worth it._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wondering if anyone picked up the clues/candy that I inserted here for a future chapter? Hint, they're in some of the words that XZ says to Yibo :P


	216. You're still the one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Firstly - Yes, the clue/candy was that I used some Wugan lyrics in XZ's dialogues in the previous chapter!
> 
> Secondly - I have an important announcement - I have realized mizmelodrama is my long lost sister and we have been reunited and are very happy to have found each other through this exquisite fandom!!
> 
> Lastly - I highly recommend listening to this song while reading this chapter if you want to get a feel of the mood I was in while I was writing this. I played it over and over again as I wrote this part!!! If you read at the pace of the melody (you know what I mean), it'll all come together beautifully (hopefully). So enjoy this slow slow slow read!
> 
> [Purple Rain Instrumental cover](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_caCWJL4bk)

* * *

Yibo laughed as Zhan continued to gaze at him lovingly.

”What?” Yibo asked, bright eyed, as his laughter slowly subsided.

”I want to make love to you,” Zhan stated, simply and quietly with a soft smile.

”I want you to make love to me too,” Yibo smiled back shyly.

Zhan leaned forward and pressed his lips against Yibo in a quick yet tender kiss.

”Come here,” He stood up and led Yibo to the bedroom by his hand. 

Yibo smiled as he followed Zhan, engulfing his delicate fingers with both his hands. He looked at the back of Zhan’s head and felt a warmth spread through his body.

Zhan turned around when they entered the room and held both of Yibo’s hands as he walked in backwards. He smiled softly at Yibo, their eyes never leaving each other for a moment.

When the back of Zhan’s leg touched the bed, he pulled Yibo into a warm embrace. They held onto each other for several seconds, swaying silently in each other’s arm.

Zhan pulled back eventually and placed kisses on Yibo’s cheeks. He grazed his skin lightly as his lips traced the soft skin and planted more kisses on the smiling face.

He ran his hands up and down Yibo’s back soothing him, lifting his shirt up a little each time. As his lips made their way down Yibo’s neck, Yibo’s arms tightened around Zhan’s waist. Zhan lifted up Yibo’s shirt and pulled it off over his head.

He wrapped his lips around the part where Yibo’s neck met his shoulder and kissed every inch of it. Yibo sighed and rested his forehead on Zhan’s shoulder. Zhan smiled against his skin and sucked on it lightly as he left a wet trail down to the edge of his shoulder.

Yibo unbuttoned Zhan’s shirt as Zhan kissed his way around to the other side of his neck, lavishing the same devotion on it. He slid the shirt off and laid his hands on Zhan’s warm naked chest. Zhan pulled him closer and swept his tongue up Yibo’s throat, sucking down on it as Yibo swallowed.

Zhan’s hands moved to unbutton Yibo’s jeans and pushed his remaining clothing off, letting Yibo step out of them. He unbuckled his own pants and slipped out of them as well. He pressed their naked bodies together and sighed into the kiss. 

”I love you, Wang Yibo,” Zhan murmured against his lips, sending a shiver down Yibo’s spine.

Zhan pulled back just enough to gaze into Yibo’s eyes. He held his face in his hands and smiled. Yibo could see the dedication and sincerity in Zhan’s eyes and something in him stirred. He felt a warmth radiate between them that sent a wave of happiness through his entire body.

”Zhan-ge…I...I…,” He felt overwhelmed with all the emotions swirling inside him.

”Shh,” Zhan ran his thumb over Yibo’s lower lip. “I know, sweetie...I know…”

With those words, Zhan enveloped Yibo’s lips once again and wrapped his hands around the back of his head. He pulled him deeper into the kiss, wrapping every inch of him with his tongue. Yibo moaned as Zhan explored his mouth relentlessly for what felt like hours. He drowned in the endless pleasure and dug his fingers into Zhan’s back.

Gradually, Zhan’s hands skated down Yibo’s body and cupped his ass. He held them firmly and massaged them harder with every gasp that escaped Yibo’s lips. Yibo’s hands clutched at Zhan’s back and helpless moans emanated from his being.

At long last, Zhan pulled back from the kiss. Their hot and heavy breaths skimmed the surface of each other’s lips. Zhan’s eyes took in the sight of Yibo - red lips ravished and bee stung, his glowing, damp and flushed skin, disheveled hair, ragged yet satiated breathing. He was a sight to behold.

Zhan climbed onto the bed, bringing Yibo with him, and lay him down on his back. He kissed his way around Yibo’s body, from his neck to his shoulder, to his collarbone, to his chest, to his nipples, to his stomach, to his hips. Wrapping his lips around every inch of Yibo, worshipping his body, inhaling his scent.

His hand reached for the drawer as he continued showering him with all his love and soon made its way to his pink opening. While Zhan’s lips lavished Yibo’s nipple with kisses and nibbles, his fingers entered Yibo slowly and at leisure.

He scissored him open at his pace, gently exploring him until he found the spot he now knew so well. He curled his fingers in and knead into the spot over and over and over again until Yibo was a mess of moans and whimpers. 

When he felt Yibo open up to him willingly and compliantly, he kissed his way back up to meet Yibo’s wet lips. He engulfed the trembling lips as he readied himself to become one with the writhing body beneath him.

He got on top of Yibo and ran his thumb across his panting lips. With one hand placed by his head, he guided himself into Yibo slowly with his other hand. He gazed into Yibo’s eyes, his own breathing growing heavier by the second.

Yibo placed a hand on Zhan’s cheek as he felt heat spread through his body and when Zhan entered him completely, he wrapped his fingers around his neck and pulled him in for a desperate kiss.

His muffled moans reverberated through Zhan’s body as Zhan began moving inside him. Zhan kissed his lower lip, then his upper lip, he played with them, bit them, then ran his tongue over them. He kissed every patch of skin he could reach and poured all his emotions onto them.

Yibo threw his head back against the pillow when Zhan thrust deeper into him, bottoming out, each time harder and faster than the last. He shut his eyes, pleasure taking over his entire body. He moaned Zhan’s name over and over and over again. 

Zhan felt tremors spread through his entire body as he felt Yibo’s warmth all around him, welcoming him, begging him, needing him. He plunged deeper each time, thrusting into Yibo, craving to be closer every single time.

Their shared sense of euphoria carried them up and over each wave of pleasure, riding higher and higher each time. Yibo grabbed Zhan’s neck, his shoulders, his back, his hips, his ass, anywhere he could find purchase to get Zhan to drive in deeper. He clutched the pillow and his lips parted as Zhan rammed into him, giving him exactly what he wanted the way he wanted it.

Zhan’s lips roved over Yibo, leaving a wet trail as they quivered. He pushed into Yibo repeatedly, overwhelmed with the erotic pleasures sweeping his body. He felt Yibo reach the edge and plunged in one final time. With a loud groan, Yibo erupted into a long release. He pounded into him through his climax, prolonging every shudder, every pur, every sigh.

Zhan moved faster, harder, deeper until he saw white. His entire body lurched forward as shockwaves shot through him. He lost all self control and fucked into Yibo as he rode his high. When he fell back down, inundating Yibo with his cum, his heavy breaths met Yibo’s in a sloppy messy reckless kiss.

After several minutes, when they had caught their breaths, Zhan and Yibo looked into each other’s eyes.

”I love you too, Xiao Zhan,” Yibo finally uttered the words. “I love you more than you will ever know."

Zhan smiled and gently kissed Yibo’s bruised lips. 

”I only ever want you, Wang Yibo,” Zhan murmured as he raised Yibo’s hand to his lips. “You’re it. You’re still the one.”

Yibo felt tears gather at the corner of his eyes. 

”You’re still the one for me too, ge,” Yibo’s shaky voice replied.

”That’s good,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s wrist. “Because it’s too late for any take backs,” he bit into the taut skin playfully.

”I don't need the option,” Yibo laughed as Zhan bit into him again. 

Zhan leaned forward and kissed away his lingering tears. He placed a kiss on Yibo’s forehead, his nose and his lips. He hummed a tender melody and sang to Yibo.

”My heart beats in your chest...and your heart beats in mine…we were made to love each other, darling...together forever until the end of time.”


	217. Full of emotion and feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I MIGHT DROP A YIZHAN AU THIS WEEKEND !!!! 
> 
> I'M ALMOST DONE WRITING IT AND AM DYING TO SHARE IT WITH Y'ALL !!!! 
> 
> WHO'S IN ?!?!?!?!!

* * *

When Yibo woke up the next morning, Zhan was not beside him. He rubbed his eyes and sat up. He yawned and stretched several times before getting out of bed. After freshening up, he made his way downstairs to the kitchen and sure enough, Zhan was there.

Yibo smiled and walked to him, wrapping himself around him from behind, and rested his cheek on Zhan’s shoulder.

”You’re up! I wanted to get you breakfast in bed!” Zhan exclaimed and placed one hand over Yibo’s that were around his waist. 

”Goodmorning,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s back.

”Goodmorning, puppy,” Zhan turned his head sideways and planted a kiss on the top of Yibo’s head.

”What are you making?”

”Just some steamed buns...I have to leave soon…”

”Mmm,” Yibo took in a long inhale, “smells good.”

Zhan turned around in Yibo’s arms and kissed him. They swayed together as the kiss deepened and Yibo sighed happily as Zhan pulled him closer. When they pulled back, Zhan brushed aside a strand of hair on Yibo's forehead. 

”Okay, I really do need to leave…but I’ll see you tonight?”

”Hmm,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s cheek. “I’ll be home by 10.”

”I’ll probably be a little later than that so don’t…”

”Don't even bother telling me to eat before you come...you know I don't like eating…”

”Alone? Yeah…I know,” Zhan rolled his eyes. “Fine!”

”Good gege,” Yibo teased.

Zhan slapped Yibo’s ass prompting Yibo to yelp and giggle.

”Okay, see you soon,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s nose and took off, leaving behind a starved Yibo who proceeded to stuff his entire face with a steamed bun.

* * *

When Zhan got home that night, Yibo was playing video games on the couch. As soon as he heard Zhan walk in, he threw his controller aside and rushed to the hallway to welcome him.

”Hey,” Zhan smiled in surprise at the enthusiasm with which Yibo hugged him. “What’s going on, puppy? Why are you so excited?” 

”I’ve been waiting for you to get home!” Yibo dragged him into the living room. “I wanted to show you something!!”

”What?” Zhan looked at him in confusion as he was forced to sit down on the couch.

”It’s finished…”

”What’s finished?” 

”I...I wrote a song…”

”What?! You did?! That’s amazing, didi!!” Zhan jumped up and held Yibo’s shoulder. “Show me!!!”

”It’s a hip-hop song...I wrote most of the rap...and I’m going to work with some producers and drop it right at new years!”

”Oh my god!!! This is brilliant. I can’t wait, didi!” Zhan hugged him and lifted him off the ground.

Yibo laughed and wiggled until Zhan had placed him down again.

”Do you wanna see it?”

”OF COURSE!” Zhan gaped at the boy. 

Yibo nodded and pulled his phone out. He turned it around to show Zhan but Zhan shook his head.

”Sing it,” Zhan sat back with a smile.

”There’s no music yet, ge...I have to still work with my team to…”

”Your rap, didi,” Zhan looked at Yibo intently. “It’s your rap. Rap it the way your heart feels.”

Yibo gulped and looked down at the phone.

”You can do this...these are your words...remember what you felt when you wrote them...and rap.”

* * *

When Yibo finished his rap, he looked up from his phone at Zhan. The entire time he had not looked up, afraid to meet Zhan’s eyes, nervous about forgetting his own words, embarrassed that he didn't sound good enough.

Zhan remained silent as their eyes met and Yibo gulped once again, unsure of how to break the silence.

”When?” Zhan finally spoke. “When did you write this?”

”I’ve been making notes and jotting things down ever since I wrote that short song for you on our anniversary….you said I should write my own rap that night...and so I...tried…do you...do you like it?”

”Do I like it?” Zhan shuffled to the edge of the couch and looked intently at Yibo. “I love it. I love every single word.”

”Zhan-ge!” Yibo chuckled and put his phone aside with a sigh, “of course you’ll love it…”

”No...I wouldn't lie to you...I really think it’s well written...the meaning behind those words...you’ve expressed so much!”

”Really?” Yibo looked at him, hesitant yet hopeful.

”Really...you’ve shown your struggles...your experiences...your life philosophy...you’ve laid your heart bare…” 

”And it doesn’t make me seem cold?”

”Are you crazy?” Zhan looked at him, perplexed. “There’s so much emotion in these words! This is you. This is your life laid out in the form of words. The good, the bad and the ugly. You’re so brave for expressing yourself so boldly. I am so proud of you.” 

”Oh...ok...ok,” Yibo let out a long breath of relief. “Good...I was...I was worried the lyrics would be misinterpreted as me telling people to be emotionless.”

”Those people who think that are stupid. It’s full of emotion and feelings,” Zhan held Yibo’s cheeks in his hands. ”Just like you.”

”Good…,” Yibo smiled. “I can't wait to record this!”

”I can't wait to hear the final song...just hearing you rapping was kinda hot,” Zhan bit his lips and let go of Yibo’s face as he slid back onto the couch.

”Oh yeah?” Yibo grinned and followed him until he was sitting on top of Zhan, face hovering inches from him.

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded with a mischievous smile on his face. 

Yibo reached for Zhan’s shirt and began sliding it up his body to take it off when he gasped out loud and fell off to one side on the couch.

”Zhan-ge!!” Yibo exclaimed.

”Wha...what?!?” Zhan asked, startled by Yibo’s reaction.

”Where did it go?!” Yibo lifted Zhan’s shirt and ran his hand over his skin.

”Where did what go?!” Zhan looked at his body where Yibo was staring.

”Your...here...this…,” Yibo pointed at Zhan’s stomach.

”My stomach?!?”

”No your….,” Yibo ran his finger down from Zhan’s naval to the waist of his pants. “Your happy trail!?!?”

”What?!” Zhan barked out loud and began laughing. “My happy what?!”

”Your happy trail...you know,” Yibo touched the area over and over again, “your hair...here…”

”Oh...is that what you call it?!?” Zhan giggled and fell back on the couch. “Actually...I shaved it off today...for a photoshoot….and my stylist thinks I should keep it this way,” Zhan shrugged.

”What!? No!!” Yibo blurted.

”What the fuck?” Zhan exclaimed. “What do you mean no?!”

”No means no. I don't like it like this...I like your happy trail! I want it back!!”

”What?!?” Zhan burst into laughter as he looked at Yibo’s genuinely upset face. “Are you serious?”

”Yes.” Yibo deadpanned.

”Bo-di!” Zhan sat up finally and levelled his gaze on Yibo. “I’m sorry,” he suppressed his laughter. ”But this is...umm...it’s gonna be like this...for the sake of my stylist…”

”I hate your stylist.” Yibo frowned. “I liked it...it was cute.”

”Bo-di!” Zhan blushed and smacked his arm. “I can't tell her that, now can I?!”

”Well...does she know your fans liked it too!?” Yibo smirked. 

”What!?” Zhan’s eyes widened. “What nonsense!”

”I swear, ge...go on any xfx account, there’ll be at least one post about your happy trail...here...I stalk some of them from my private...I’ll show you…,” Yibo whipped his phone back up and made a few swipes.

”No!” Zhan pushed his phone away, “I don't want to see people talk about my body...hair...what even...how do you...why do you…,” a very flustered Zhan started rambling.

Yibo grinned and before Zhan could finish any of his incomplete sentences, he enveloped his lips and wrapped his arms around his waist, pushing him back with his body until he was laying on the couch.

”They don't just talk about your happy trail you know….,” Yibo winked. 

”Yibo!! Are you even human!?” Zhan covered his face in embarrassment.

Yibo cackled and moved his hand away.

”They talk about where it leads to…..they talk about everything…,” he smirked mischievously.

Shut up, Yibo!!” Zhan grabbed the cushion and smacked his face with it.

Yibo cackled louder and threw the pillow aside. He got on top of Zhan and pinned him down.

”But they can only talk...I’m the one who gets to see...touch...and do…,” Yibo’s eyes darkened.

Zhan stopped squirming when he saw the expression on Yibo’s face. He bit his lips and smiled at Yibo who was eyeing him hungrily. 

”Then see…,” Zhan stretched his arms higher to pull Yibo closer, “touch…,” he rubbed their noses together, “and do…,” Zhan whispered as he rolled his hips upwards against Yibo.

”Fuck…,” Yibo shut his eyes and pressed into Zhan’s hips. “You’re going to be the death of me one day, Zhan-ge.”

Zhan grinned and bit Yibo’s lower lip.

”Well then you better fuck me before that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to talk about the missing happy trail!!! T_T Did y'all notice its absence in XZ's new year rehearsal video or are you normal?
> 
> Happy trail present (yes imma spam you) -  
> https://twitter.com/yibolwji/status/1232433894839869442  
> https://twitter.com/douxsuga/status/1220875637428191235  
> https://twitter.com/drunkwxngji/status/1222177742952652805  
> https://twitter.com/wwuxiansmile/status/1245208483772813312/photo/1
> 
> Happy trail gone (!!!) -  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhanism/status/1228155334524469249  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1228143443819606016
> 
> In case someone was interested -  
> Chapter 194 was where Yibo writes a small song to surprise Zhan (no such song exists in real life, it was just a subplot).
> 
> Wugan English lyrics woooooooooo -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaRzDMK6DfM
> 
> Also, now we are at the end of November 2019.


	218. Soon means soon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 1 of my new Chef!Xiao Zhan and Idol!Wang Yibo AU is out now!!. 
> 
> [Chef's kiss](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24098911)
> 
> Warning: It's a shameless rom com!

* * *

”Bo-di…,” Zhan moaned and dug his hands into the bed. “Fuck…keep going…”

Yibo grabbed Zhan’s hips tightly and groaned and fell forward as he continued to enter Zhan, who despite all the prepping and lube was still taut, sending electric jolts through Yibo’s body as every inch of him was engulfed. Zhan was on all fours by the time Yibo bottomed out. He sank his fingers into Zhan’s back as Zhan rolled his ass against his hip. 

”Fuck, ge….you feel so good…”

”Move, Bo-di,” Zhan sighed into the bed. “Fuck...please...move…”

With a smirk, Yibo began pulling out at an excruciatingly slow pace.

”Wang Yibo,” Zhan growled at Yibo’s torture. “Don’t fucking tease me,” Zhan tried pushing back against him but was held in place by Yibo’s hands. 

”I love it when you beg, ge,” Yibo whispered as he moved his hands down to Zhan’s waist, holding the petite frame in his big hands.

”I’m literally on all fours,” Zhan sighed as Yibo pinched his nipples. “Please….move….”

Yibo bit his lips and groaned as he finally thrust into Zhan, with full force. He spared no mercy. Pulling out again and ramming harder each time until Zhan’s head dropped helplessly and he collapsed onto the bed, raising his hips higher, arching his back.

Yibo growled as the new angle sent ripples of pleasure through his body. He raised his hand and brought it down recklessly on Zhan’s ass, leaving behind a bright red mark. He repeated the action, this time leaving a bruise.

”Yibo....,” Zhan’s body lurched forward but was pulled back harshly by Yibo.

Zhan pounded his fist into the bed as Yibo pounded into him.

”Faster, Bo-di...faster…,” Zhan yelled as he began reaching the edge.

Yibo thrust into him again and again as sweat dripped from his face onto Zhan’s back, trailing down his sides. As Yibo increased his pace, Zhan began letting out lewd sounds and filthy words that were driving Yibo closer to the edge at a maddening pace. 

Zhan matched his rhythm and followed it, desperately chasing his climax. When his screams grew louder, Yibo knew he was close. He pulled his hips higher and spread him and entered him deeper. With one final thrust, Yibo sent Zhan free-falling and as his orgasm peaked and began crashing, he fucked him through it mercilessly. 

Zhan saw stars as Yibo thrust into him three more times before he fell forward coming inside Zhan forcefully, filling him up until he was overflowing. Zhan felt the warm cum dripping down his ass. 

After several seconds of riding their high, both fell onto the bed and Zhan moaned in satisfaction at the sensation of Yibo still inside him as his warm weight enclosed him.

Eventually Zhan flipped around and Yibo hugged him from the top. Zhan encircled his arms around Yibo’s sweaty panting body and placed a kiss on his head.

”Zhan-ge…,” Yibo sighed and looked up, placing his chin on his chest.

”Bo-di…,” Zhan smiled and pushed his damp hair to one side.

”I’m going to miss you…”

”Me too, didi...it’s just a few weeks…”

”Four weeks,” Yibo pouted.

”I’ll video as much as I can...and we can have a lots of phone sex!” Zhan grinned.

”Everyday?” Yibo wiggled his eyebrows.

”Shut up!” Zhan lightly smacked his shoulder.

* * *

> _Bo-di: Zhan-ge!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Ge!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Gege!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: XIAO ZHAN!!  
>    
>  Zhan: What is it, didi!?  
>    
>  Zhan: Sorry, I was shooting all day without break  
>    
>  Bo-di: I miss you!  
>    
>  Zhan: I literally just left Beijing yesterday!!  
>    
>  Zhan: But I miss you too _😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Yeah, but you’re going to be gone for almost four weeks again  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’ll only see you next at the Tencent awards!!  
>    
>  Zhan: Sorry, didi...but like I promised...my schedule will be better from Jan  
>    
>  Bo-di: I know _😘 _  
>   
>  _

Zhan sighed and rested his head back against the wall as he sat on his chair and waited for the next shot. A few more weeks and he’d be done with the Oath of love. He had vowed to himself to not go overboard with his work schedule after that. Even now, he would shudder at how close he had gotten to ruining his relationship with Yibo.

_Never again._ Zhan thought to himself. _Nothing I do will ever harm us again. I’ll do whatever is in my power to prevent anything bad from happening to us. No matter what it is._

* * *

This time, their four weeks apart went smoother than before. There were no fights, no cold wars, no pain, no frustration. The only fights they had was about Yibo’s eternally pending unpacking and his unending nagging for a very special request.

”No.”

”Yes.”

”No.”

”Ge!!!!”

”Didi!!!”

Yibo pouted at his phone as Zhan rolled his eyes. They had been on the video call for half an hour and still had come to no resolution. Just as they had come to no resolution on the last three video calls.

It was nearing the end of December and Yibo had been begging Zhan for a very specific new years gift.

Ge, please!” Yibo deepened his pout and batted his eyelashes.

”It didn't work last time and it won't work this time, Yibo!” Zhan shook his head.

”But why, ge? I know you want it too.”

”I do, didi,” Zhan sighed, “but it’s not practical...it doesn’t make sense for us...especially right now...with our careers.”

”In that case, we’ll never do it…,” Yibo’s voice grew serious.

”We will, didi,” Zhan’s voice softened. “I promised, didn't I?”

”Then when?” Yibo’s voice reduced to a whisper.

Zhan let out another long sigh and gazed at Yibo’s disheartened face.

”Soon, didi...please give me some time. Once my schedule stabilizes?”

”Hmm,” Yibo mumbled. “Okay…”

”I have to go now,” Zhan spoke gently. “Okay? I’ll message you later.”

”Okay…”

”I love you, sweetie…,” Zhan smiled at him.

”No, you don't,” Yibo poked his tongue out.

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan chuckled at his childishness. “I said I love you.”

”Then say it…”

”Didi…”

”Say it…”

”We’ll do it…”

”Do what?”

Zhan groaned and ran a hand down his face.

”We will get a pet soon, didi…”

”No...be more specific,” Yibo frowned.

”Fine!” Zhan rolled his eyes. “We will get a puppy soon.”

”Good!” Yibo’s eyes lit up and he smiled in satisfaction. “Soon means soon.”

”Yes, didi,” Zhan saluted at the camera. “Soon.”

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: I’m really nervous, didi!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Just five more days for new years!!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: And I still don't feel ready with my dance!!  
>    
>  Yibo: Relax, ge...  
>    
>  Yibo: You’ll be back tomorrow  
>    
>  Yibo: I can come over and help you rehearse at the studio after the tencent awards  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Okay...okay...I’ll make sure no one else is there  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: BUT I NEED YOUR HELP!  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes, ge...don’t worry...you’re going to be amazing!  
>    
>  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the sudden jump through December but I'm super excited about Tencent awards and there's also another plot brewing!!!


	219. Tencent is a huge fan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the love for my [other Yizhan chef AU](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24098911)!!!!!

* * *

> _Yibo: I’m stuck in traffic...I don't think I’ll make it in time for the red carpet!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Oh, that sucks...was hoping I could you meet you before we had to take our seats  
>    
>  Yibo: Me too _😓 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: But I have some interviews to do so maybe I’ll be stuck with those after the red carpet anyway  
>    
>  Yibo: Wow...couldn’t they have postponed that for later? You’re already coming straight from the airport! _😠 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: It’s okay, didi  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Okay, I’m about to reach...I’ll see you there then  
>    
>  Yibo: In front of dozens of cameras with no privacy  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: But we’ll get all the privacy we want at home afterwards_😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Yeah, you’re right...I wish I could walk the red carpet with you though  
>    
>  Yibo: Hand in hand  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I know, didi...me too  
>    
>  _

Yibo sighed and looked out the window of his car. They were still stuck in the typical Beijing traffic. All his hopes of catching Zhan alone in the restroom and stealing a few kisses were now out that very window.

 _Can’t believe we haven't seen each other for four weeks and I don't even get to hug my boyfriend let alone do anything else!!!_ Yibo pouted internally.

Half an hour later, he reached the venue. When he got to his seat after walking through the line of photographers, there was no sign of Zhan. Mildly disappointed, Yibo sat down on the couch that they would occupy for the rest of the show.

 _Zhan-ge must still be in his interview._ Yibo looked around, bored and blank.

At long last, as Yibo was looking around aimlessly, his Zhan-radar spotted a movement to his left from the corner of his eye. He looked in the direction as discreetly as possible and sure enough, Zhan had arrived.

Yibo’s face lit up but he quickly schooled his expression and reigned in his urge to run and hug and kiss the man senseless. Zhan approached the couch and snapped his fingers at Yibo and Yibo could see that Zhan was trying to play it casual and cool.

_Fine, if that’s what he wants!_ Yibo groaned inwardly.

As the event progressed, the cameras never left them for a single moment. But eventually they grew more relaxed and began talking to each other, keeping it professional of course. When Zhang Bichen came on stage to perform Yuji, Yibo gave a little frown. 

_I wish we would have gotten to perform Wuji together. But they had a certain vision for this piece apparently and it would have been too risky for us to be together for that. I wonder what it is!!_

As her performance progressed though, Yibo understood exactly why they couldn't have performed. On stage were two male dancers, one in Wei Wuxian’s colors and the other in Lan Wangji’s colors. Both were contemporary dancers. Both were dancing in gentle, delicate, beautiful ways. And most importantly, both were dancing together, in very intimate ways.

 _Yeah._ Yibo thought. _If people weren’t sure that the Untamed was a love story between two men….then us on stage singing together, looking at each other the way we do...with those two guys dancing together in the background...would have done it!_

* * *

Zhan looked up at the screen as soon as Zhang Bicheng’s performance began and sure enough the cameras were on Yibo and him. He shook his head in amusement as the screen kept alternating between Zhang Bicheng and them. 

_Are you kidding me?_ Zhan groaned inwardly. _I can barely stand sitting this close to him and not holding his hand or kissing him senseless! And now they’re not gonna even let us have a proper conversation!!?_

Zhan adjusted himself in his seat repeatedly, smoothing his pants, fiddling with his sleeve, shuffling his collar. As soon as the performance was done, the hosts announced the award for Yibo and him. They stood up, in sync as always and made their way to the stage.

The audience, to put it lightly, went completly bat shit crazy. The noise levels were berserk. They could barely hear the hosts and each other when they gave their thank you speeches.

In the crowd, they could see the red, green and more importantly yellow signs. Yibo was sure he caught a _’Zhan-ge, didi ai ni’_ sign in the distance and couldn't help but feel a surge of pride and joy.

When they were done with their speeches the hosts asked them to wish tencent a happy birthday. Zhan couldn't hear the request over the shouts and screams all around them. After several failed attempts, Yibo stepped closer to him and whispered in his ear to let him know.

”And also,” Yibo couldn't stop himself from adding, “I fucking missed you so much, ge! You look so hot.”

Zhan did his best to control his flush as he nodded and they wished Tencent together. They looked all around, bowing to their ecstatic fans and then pointed in different directions as they tried to figure out which way the exit was.

They continued chatting as they exited the stage and walked backstage completely in sync to their respective dressing rooms to get ready for their performances. 

When they reached Zhan’s room first, Zhan paused and raised an eyebrow. Right next to his room was Yibo’ room. Both their names were adjacent to each other. Zhan turned around and looked at Yibo in surprise. Yibo shrugged his shoulders and raised his hands.

”Wasn't me,” Yibo muttered. 

”Let’s just say,” Yibo’s manager caught up with them. “Tencent is a huge fan of yours and it wasn't hard to convince them to give you rooms side by side.” She smiled with a wink.

Yibo and Zhan looked at her, astonished, and then cracked into smiles as well. 

”Thank you,” Zhan bowed as Yibo’s smile widened.

”Ah, good.” Zhan’s manager joined them just then, speaking into her phone busily. “Yes...yes,” she continued to respond to the person at the other end of the line. “He will be there immediately after this event….yes, no we can do it as late as you want tonight, not a problem….thank you...see you soon.”

”What was that?” Zhan asked his manager.

”We’ve had to bump another meeting up to tonight...so we gotta go there directly from here.” She shrugged.

”But I…,” Zhan inhaled and managed his tone, “I just came here straight from the airport. Is there no way I can do it tomorrow?”

”Sorry. It’ll only take an hour.”

”Alright,” Zhan swallowed his irritation. “It’s fine.”

From the corner of his eyes, he saw Yibo’s fists clench. A nervousness spread through his body when he couldn't make out if Yibo was angry at him or his manager or perhaps both.

”Let’s go to your dressing room,” she barged into the room before Zhan. “We need to discuss a lot.”

Behind him, Zhan could feel Yibo’s frowning face and intense eyes following him. As he entered the room, he turned around and gave Yibo an apologetic look and closed the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My fav Yizhan analysis at the event -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iptLJeOSzs&feature=youtu.be
> 
> All yizhan moments -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7zB5GJdF-U&  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShAveRjV2RQ  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FTy4SCCgTf8  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNw9YQwcrI8  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxX84u6Dv9s
> 
> In depth analysis of their swollen lips at the event LMAO -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLy63e7lntc
> 
> YIZHAN backstage rooms were side by side for one of the award nights which I’m pretty sure was Tencent!  
> https://twitter.com/lightxiaozhan/status/1210856385740541952
> 
> In case anyone wants to watch the whole awards show -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zK041gbuBXU
> 
> Zhang Bichen singing Wuji (and the two male dancers!!!!!) at the event and Yizhan (one cam was always on them LMAO!!!!) -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1PnyeODIZj8  
> (I love how they keep checking the screen to see if they are on it and look relieved when they realize they’re not. Little did they know the camera was still recording them for us hahahaha! And maybe the reason Yizhan couldn’t perform Wuji, which I’m still salty about is because then they wouldn’t be able to have two men dancing so lovingly with each other!!)
> 
> Better look (sort of) at the two male dancers that performed a very intimate routine to Wuji. You can see yizhan sitting in the background so they could probably see these two guys dancing!  
> https://twitter.com/yiboism0/status/1216839020157816834  
> https://twitter.com/yizhan10585/status/1225869459715391493


	220. I need to discuss something important

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 of my new Chef!Xiao Zhan and Idol!Wang Yibo AU - [Chef's kiss](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24098911) \- is out now!!

* * *

Zhan paced the room and massaged his forehead as his manager briefed him on the upcoming meeting and his schedule for the rest of the week. His mind had begun racing at the mere thought of the back to back commitments. As he walked towards the opposite end of the room, something caught his attention. There was a door inside his room that he hadn't noticed before. And what was more interesting was that it was in the wall he shared with Yibo’s room.

At long last, when she stopped talking, he turned to her and before he knew what he was doing he made what could only be interpreted as an announcement more than a request to his team.

”Can all of you please give me the room? I want to change and then do some vocal warm ups in peace. My head is hurting.” Zhan spoke in a soft yet firm voice.

Although visibly taken aback, his manager conceded and Zhan thought he saw a roll of her eyes as she and the team stepped out. He locked the door and quickly changed into his next outfit. Then, after several hesitant moments, he walked towards the shared connecting door and slowly, very cautiously turned the knob. 

He opened the door a little and peeked into Yibo’s room. With a knock, he poked his head inside and to his relief and slight embarrassment, saw Yibo, his manager and his hair and make-up team inside. 

”Umm…,” Zhan cleared his throat and took one step inside. “May I...may I come in?”

”Ye...yes, of course, Zhan-ge,” Yibo replied first in as formal a voice as possible. 

On seeing Yibo in his next outfit, black pants, a black shiny velvet shirt with a white inshirt, and bangs that framed his face, something stirred in Zhan. He wasn't sure if it was the rising frustration because of his manager or the sight of Yibo looking delectable or the longing of four weeks apart that took over, but he found himself walking inside confidently, all hesitation gone.

”I need to discuss something important with Yibo,” Zhan adjusted his cuff while looking Yibo’s manager straight in the eye, calmly and cooly. “Can we please have the room for a few minutes?”

Yibo couldn't take his eyes off Zhan, who walked towards him, walking with his trademark long strides. He looked tall, dark and handsome in his black pants, black shirt, and fitted black and silver jacket; his hair a little messy as if he had run his hand through it several times.

”Of course,” Yibo’s manager recovered and spoke. “You had that important matter to discuss...I totally forgot...my apologies,” she lied to break the awkwardness in the room, “But make sure you don't take too long...you go on stage first.”

Zhan nodded and bowed and the staff left the room. He walked over and locked the door and then turned to face Yibo. As if on cue, Yibo walked hurriedly towards Zhan and as soon as he was within arm’s reach, Zhan reached out and wrapped his hand around Yibo’s neck and pulled him in roughly for a kiss.

Both moaned as soon as their lips met, starved for weeks for each others’ taste. They dove into each other, sloppy and wet. Zhan wasted no time and flipped them around, slamming Yibo into the door and proceeded to devour Yibo, sucking hard on his lower lip. His hand slid down Yibo’s sides and groped his ass.

Yibo breathed into Zhan’s mouth and angled his head to one side when Zhan kissed his way down his jaw and to his neck. He sighed happily and a little breathlessly as Zhan’s hands grabbed at every inch of his body.

”Ge,” Yibo spoke in a raspy voice, “don’t...don't leave a mark…”

Zhan growled against his neck and pulled away. He squeezed Yibos’ ass and pushed against his hips, rolling forward to meet him. Yibo bit his lips to suppress his groan and crashed his lips against Zhan once more.

”I missed you so much, sweetie,” Zhan said in a low voice in between reckless kisses. 

”I missed you too, ge…fuck….”, Yibo whispered as Zhan rolled against his hips over and over again, pressing down into him.

”I want to fuck you right now….,” Zhan nipped Yibo’s lower lip, sucking on it harshly.

”Aah...ge...no time...no...no lube…,” Yibo clutched Zhan’s jacket, his dick slowly giving in nonetheless.

”Looks like someone wants it bad too,” Zhan smirked as he kissed Yibo’s neck all over, grinding against him greedily. 

”Always, ge...but…”

”But what, didi,” Zhan bit down on Yibo’s collar bone through his shirt.

As Zhan bit everywhere on his chest, Yibo forgot every reason why they shouldn't be doing what they were doing; why they shouldn’t let it get out of hand.

”Ge...it’s been so long...if you keep...ahh,” Yibo mumbled through his moans, “if you keep doing this...I won't last...I won't be able to stop from coming…”

”What do you think I’m trying to do here, didi…,” Zhan smirked as he grinded into Yibo, “....fuck you’re beautiful...I missed your dick…”

”Zhan-ge….ge,” Yibo bit his lips hard to keep himself from screaming as Zhan slid one hand smoothly into his pants.

”Fuck…you’re so hard...I wish I could eat you up,” Zhan bit Yibo’s ear.

”Ge….you have to sing in a few minutes….Zhan-ge,” Yibo fell forward and rested his forehead on Zhan’s shoulder.

Zhan moved his hand on Yibo quickly, hard and fast. He enveloped his lips once more and kissed him passionately. He reached deep into Yibo with his tongue as his hand worked him mercilessly, making Yibo go weak in the knees.

After several more seconds of torture, Yibo bit down on Zhan’s shoulder. He stifled his scream as he came gushing into Zhan’s hand. Zhan shut his eyes and stroked Yibo slowly, enjoying every second of Yibo’s warm cum filling up his hand.

”Fuck, ge….you’re gonna get us in trouble one day,” Yibo chuckled and placed a kiss on Zhan’s shoulder. “What if someone notices your...”

”Good thing I’m wearing black,” Zhan licked Yibo’s sweaty neck and brushed against his lips, making him shudder.

Just then, there was a soft knock on the door.

”Almost time for your performance Xiao Zhan,” Yibo’s manager spoke in a very soft voice.

”Just a minute, thank you,” Zhan replied in a calm and collected manner despite his heavy breathing.

He grabbed Yibo by the hair and pulled him into one last rough kiss.

”I’m sorry...you’ll have to wait a little longer tonight,” Zhan spoke in a deep, husky voice, still catching his breath. “Thought I’d give you a little preview…”

”You’re worth it,” Yibo whispered.

”So cheesy, didi,” Zhan smiled and rubbed their noses together. 

”Only for you, ge,” Yibo smiled back, pecking at Zhan’s lips one last time.

Zhan sighed and pulled out of Yibo’s pants and picked up a face wipe from the make-up table to clean his hands with. With one last look at Yibo and a caress of his cheek, he began walking back to his room. 

”Fix your make up, ge,” Yibo chuckled.

”Clean your pants,” Zhan retorted back and closed the door behind him.

When Zhan got to his room, he locked the connecting door behind him. He quickly applied his lipstick again and tried to straighten his hair when there was an urgent knock on his door. He grit his teeth and composed himself before opening the door

”Finally!! Did you get enough of a _break_?” Zhan’s manager began with a sting to her tone. “We need to get moving, it’s your turn to…”

She paused mid-sentence as she looked at Zhan. Her eyes scanned his face and hair and her eyes narrowed. He swallowed and tried to maintain a poker face.

”Yes, I’m done with my rehearsal,” Zhan stated quickly. “Let’s go.” 

As he walked out of the room, Zhan’s manager followed behind him but not before turning back one last time. She glanced around the room and suddenly a strange look appeared on her face when her eyes fell on the connecting door. After a second of assessing the situation, she left the room and closed the door firmly behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that you guys have seen the Tencent videos, is it just me or did Yizhan look happier and chattier in the second half of the event after their performances? hehe
> 
> YIZHAN backstage rooms were side by side for one of the award nights which I’m pretty sure was Tencent!  
> https://twitter.com/lightxiaozhan/status/1210856385740541952
> 
> In depth analysis of their swollen lips at the event LMAO -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLy63e7lntc
> 
> Proof that Xiao Zhan has gorgeous melanin that gets whitewashed almost always :(  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1245925030434766859
> 
> Xiao Zhan performance at the event -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mg66CFuREj4
> 
> This song is “Remaining years” from the Joy of Life and is sung by XZ. Here are the english lyrics -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2R4Z3q5vzbw
> 
> Yibo dance performance at the event -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sE7figKdp5g  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t1ArouZKamE


	221. Silly gege

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 of my new Chef!Xiao Zhan and Idol!Wang Yibo AU - [Chef's kiss](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24098911) \- is out now!!

* * *

Yibo was busy gathering himself in his room after Zhan ravished him when there was another soft knock on the door.

”Yeah, come in!” He called out.

The door opened and in walked his manager and the rest of his team. She walked right up to Yibo and looked him up and down. With a roll of her eyes, she turned to hair and make-up.

”You have five minutes…,” she directed them. “Fix that,” she jerked her thumb over her shoulder towards a sheepishly grinning Yibo.

”So…,” she sighed as they worked on Yibo, “looks like it’s an open secret among your team.”

”Pretty much...driver...bodyguard…”

”And now hair and make-up,” his make-up jie winked. 

Yibo blushed and looked at his legs as they finished setting his hair and doing touch ups on his face.

”Who else…,” his manager asked. “I need to know…”

”Some of our closest friends, our parents...no one from his team except his driver and I think his bodyguard has a hunch but Zhan-ge hasn't confirmed anything with him yet.”

”Wow...okay...that’s a lot of people...I’m sure there are many more people who have ‘hunches’ about you two…,” she pursed her lips.

”What are you thinking?” Yibo asked her, suddenly alert and nervous.

”Just playing out all the various scenarios that could happen and how I would put the fire out and do some damage control.” She shrugged.

”Done with his hair and make-up,” the other lady announced. “Good luck with your performance, Yibo!”

”Thanks, jie,” Yibo smiled and stood up again.

He took a long look at himself in the mirror and on close scrutiny found that, despite all the lipstick and liner, his lower lip looked significantly swollen and plush. He felt a hot flush creeping up his neck - a mix of embarrassment and pride.

With another adjustment of his shirt, he followed his team, hoping to catch the tail end of Zhan’s performance. But by the time he reached backstage, Zhan’s performance was done and he was leaving the stage. 

They were surrounded by a lot of staff and Zhan was heading back to his dressing room. As they passed each other by, Zhan and Yibo spared each other a fleeting glance and a subtle nod, formal enough to not arouse any interest of the staff whose eyes were already on them like hawks.

Yibo thought he saw the corner of Zhan’s lip curl up in a side smirk and his heart fluttered at the hotness that Zhan radiated just by one look.

As he got on stage, he focussed his mind on his performance and gave it his all. He knew Zhan was probably still in his room and unable to watch him perform but he still imagined that Zhan’s eyes were on him and moved his body in all kinds of ways.

By the time he was done with the performance and done changing to his next outfit of the night, Zhan was already in his seat again. This time they were not going to be alone. This time there were other award recipients sharing the couch with them. 

When Zhan took his seat, Yang Yang was already occupying one corner of the couch. They smiled and bowed to each other formally as Zhan took his previous seat towards the center of the couch. 

”Nice to finally meet you, Xiao Zhan,” Yang Yang leaned over. 

”Same here,” Zhan smiled amicably. 

”I just caught your and Wang Yibo’s performances,” Yang Yang continued. “I must say, your singing is beautiful...and of course, no one dances like Wang Yibo.”

”Thank you,” Zhan grinned in embarrassment. “I still have much to improve on but Bo-d...Yibo is undoubtedly the dance king of Asia,” Zhan added fondly.

”That he is,” Yang Yang looked at the stage as if Yibo was still on it.

Something in his tone made Zhan sit up and take notice. He eyed the man carefully and when he turned to look at him again, Zhan thought he saw an expression that was something like interest and intrigue. He felt his guess was right when Yang Yang spoke to him for a few more minutes about Yibo.

”You two are good friends, right? What is he like? I’ve heard he is aloof and distant but also very hardworking...which isn't surprising given how much he has accomplished at such a young age…”

”Uhh...yes...that he has,” Zhan spoke as courteously as he could. “He is very hardworking and even though he may seem aloof, he’s actually very good natured and kind once you get to know him.”

”Ah,” Yang Yang nodded, “I’m looking forward to getting to know him better then...hopefully we can work together in the future.”

”Of course, it was a pleasure working with him,” Zhan replied politely but he found himself seething inside as something in the man’s tone irked him.

”I’m sure it will be a pleasure for me too,” Yang Yang smiled, but it seemed more like a smirk, as he licked his lips and adjusted his pants and posture.

 _Don’t do something brash, Zhan!_ Zhan controlled himself. _Maybe you’re reading too much into his comments._

When Yang Mi and Dil Reba joined them at their seats, both men stood and bowed as they took their seats. Zhan had just begun to feel at ease when Yibo appeared and joined them as well. This time, he noticed Yang Yang’s gaze linger longer than necessary.

Yibo bowed to the women and Yang Yang, who noticeably shifted as if making space for Yibo. Zhan grit his teeth but to his satisfaction, Yibo crossed him and sat on Zhan’s other side. Zhan looked down as if fidgeting with his jacket to hide his smug smile.

As they waited for their award to be announced, Yibo was engrossed in a conversation with Zhan. Zhan didn't miss the glances Yang Yang threw Yibo’s way and he also noticed the ice cold expression that was suddenly plastered on his face as Yibo showed no interest in him.

When they got up to head to the stage for their award, Yibo waited behind for his co-star, Zhao Liying, to join him since he had been instructed to walk on stage together to promote their pairing. His eyes kept roving to Zhan, wanting to walk up with him instead.

Zhan also turned around to look for Yibo when he was lagging behind but on realizing he was waiting for her, moved up quickly. When Yibo finally joined him on stage, he stood once again, on the other side of Zhan, away from his co-star instead of beside her.

Zhan couldn't help but feel happy at Yibo’s involuntary preference for him. He chuckled inwardly and when Zhao Liying tried talking to Yibo, he put his hands on both of Yibo’s shoulders and shoved him gently in her direction, putting him beside her and moving to the end of the line himself.

Yibo looked at Zhan, a little astonished at the action, but continued talking to her. Once their conversation ended, he shuffled closer to Zhan once more and leaned in.

”Sorry, I had to wait for her.” Yibo whispered.

”No need to apologize, didi,” Zhan smiled and whispered back.

Zhan couldn't wipe the smile on his face at how much attention Yibo showered on him the next several minutes. 

_It was so stupid of me to get insecure and angry at Yang Yang. Even if he was interested in Yibo, there is no way he even has a shot. Yibo has eyes for me and me alone._

”What are you smiling so much about, ge?” Yibo asked as the line was made to shift to begin posing for the numerous photographers.

”Nothing,” Zhan’s smile became even brighter as his voice grew even quieter. “Just realized how much you love me.”

”Ge!” Yibo chuckled and whispered carefully. “Be careful, there are so many eyes on us. And you _just_ realized it?!?!” 

”Do you even know how many people have their eyes on _you_? How many people want you? Men included.” Zhan turned slightly to face Yibo whose head was completely turned towards him, both forgetting that they were supposed to look at the cameras.

”Really?” Yibo laughed. “I don't care. I only have my eyes…”

”On me?” Zhan beamed.

”Hmm,” Yibo leaned in closer and spoke in Zhan’s ears. “I only ever want you.”

Zhan curled his lips inwards to prevent himself from smiling any wider. Yibo turned back in front finally and they posed for the cameras. They were then instructed to walk to a podium for another set of photos. Yibo and Zhan made their way at leisure, still engrossed in each other.

”So...it was Yang Yang wasn’t it?” Yibo whispered. 

Zhan looked down as he walked beside Yibo and nodded. 

”Silly gege,” Yibo smiled softly. “He’s no match for you.”

After the photos, they made their way back off stage. Yibo followed close behind Zhao Liying and Zhan followed him, giddy with happiness. They were led backstage to their dressing rooms but to Yibo’s dismay, Zhan’s manager got to him before he could enter the dressing room..

”We need to get going for the meeting,” she spoke fast and urgently. “We got all your things from the room...let’s go.”

Zhan let out a long exhale and nodded. He turned back to catch Yibo just before he entered his dressing room. They smiled and nodded at each other before Zhan turned around and followed his team towards the exit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: the dialog between Yizhan on stage is all made up by me. There is no fan lip reading for it as far as I know. And I've taken liberties with the order and placement of the other actors on the couch.
> 
> Fancam of all of the actors arriving at their seats -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYdGXLpgkes
> 
> Yizhan, Yang Yang, Yang Mi, Zhao Liying, Dilreba receiving their awards  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJxcHwzcXrc  
> (Note timestamp 3:00 when XZ turns around to look for Yibo who was waiting for his Legend of Fei co-star to come)  
> (Note timestamp 4:00 where Yibo is standing beside XZ, literally stuck to his side haha)  
> (Note timestamp 4:15 where Yizhan is in their own world chatting while the rest of them are posing for the photographers)  
> (Note timestamp 4:50 where Yibo shuffles closer to XZ again and this time Zhao Liying, his co-star, notices lol)
> 
> Their speeches on receiving the award  
> https://youtu.be/p94TQ_uI3wE?t=447  
> (Notice XZ’s smile when Yibo is giving his speech and Yibo’s LWJ style faint smile when XZ is giving his speech)  
> (Note timestamp 8:22 when Yizhan is once again shuffling closer to each other and chatting while everyone is making their way to the podium for another photo, they are of course the last to reach lmao)
> 
> The videos linked in the previous chapter also show the other yizhan moments after this like where Yibo leaned in towards Zhan for the photo at that same podium, when their hands touch, when they walk off stage together etc.


	222. That was too close

* * *

That night, Zhan came home well past midnight. Yibo had already passed out from exhaustion and didn't stir when Zhan got into bed. Zhan smiled tiredly at his fast asleep boyfriend. Yibo was sleeping on his side, almost in a foetal position, one hand cushioning his cheek, the other tucked between his legs that were bent at the knees. 

Zhan slid closer to him under the blanket and let out a long sigh of relief and satisfaction when he spooned him from behind. He lined himself up behind Yibo and threw one arm over him, pressing against him cozily. He buried his face in the curve of Yibo’s neck and took in a long inhale, taking in the scent of the person he had missed for four weeks.

Zhan made himself content with a gentle kiss on Yibo’s soft skin. Just then, Yibo stirred and Zhan cursed inwardly at having disturbed him. Yibo turned around in Zhan’s arm and came face to face with him.

”Hey…,” Yibo smiled sleepily at Zhan with drooping eyes.

”Hi…,” Zhan smiled back and kissed his nose.

”I tried staying up,” Yibo rubbed his eyes.

”It’s okay...sorry my meeting went late...go back to sleep…”

”I missed you,” Yibo shuffled closer and tucked his face against Zhan’s chest, wrapping his arm and leg around him tightly.

”I missed you too, sweetie,” Zhan placed a kiss on Yibo’s head and held him close. “Now close your eyes…”

It didn't take long for Yibo’s breath to even out and before Zhan knew it, Yibo was fast asleep once more.

Zhan smiled to himself and closed his eyes as well. It was the fastest he had ever fallen asleep and he couldn't tell if it was because of sheer exhaustion or because of the satisfaction of holding Yibo in his arms.

* * *

> _Bo-di: Almost there, ge  
>    
>  Bo-di: See you in ten minutes  
>    
>  Zhan: Okay, come soon  
>    
>  Zhan: I’m freaking out  
>    
>  Zhan: The show is in three days, didi!!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Don’t worry, ge...you’re just nervous...I’ll help you rehearse today  
>    
>  Bo-di: Your new years performance is going to blow everyone away  
>    
>  Bo-di: They won't see it coming!  
>    
>  Zhan: Hmm...okay...just get here soon  
>    
>  Bo-di: 5 more minutes_ 😘 

Zhan took in a deep breath and adjusted his cap. He bit his lips and waited and sure enough a few minutes later, the door to the dance studio opened and in walked Yibo, dressed to dance.

They spent the next hour going over the choreography slowly, just like they did in the past whenever Yibo helped Zhan to rehearse. The difference was this time Yibo had all the right in the world to touch Zhan. And touch him he did. Everywhere.

”I hope this is not how you teach everyone choreography,” Zhan teased. 

”Only you,” Yibo whispered as he was standing behind Zhan adjusting his shoulders for a move.

Zhan giggled as Yibo wrapped his arms around him and bit his ear playfully.

”Stop!” Zhan wiggled in Yibo’s embrace. “We need to focus….we don't have much time,” he laughed.

”Fine...fine…,” Yibo let go of Zhan and played the music again.

He watched as Zhan went over the steps to the music, noting where he needed improvement and where he did well. He licked his lips when Zhan raised his arms above his head and his shirt flew up, revealing his thin waist. He gulped and kept himself in check, reminding himself how crucial it was for Zhan to focus on rehearsing.

When Zhan got stuck, Yibo would stop the music and show him the step slowly until he could do it at the speed of the song. When Zhan nailed a section, Yibo would clap and cheer. 

Slowly, with several repetitions, Zhan gained more confidence than he had over the last several weeks rehearsing with the choreography team. When he was done, he asked Yibo to record him doing the whole piece at one go.

”I want to wear your shirt…,” Zhan pointed at Yibo’s black and white chequered shirt…”

”Why?! You’re already wearing a sweatshirt and sweating so much!” Yibo asked, bewildered.

”Just another candy for our cp fans,” Zhan grinned and winked.

Yibo rolled his eyes but smiled and complied. They did several takes until Zhan was satisfied with his performance. Yibo walked up to Zhan and they hunched together as they reviewed the video on Yibo’s phone.

Yibo’s eyes wandered to Zhan who was reviewing the video intently. Something about how focussed and serious he was, made Yibo’s heart flutter. When the video was done, Zhan smiled and turned to Yibo.

”I’m feeling much better now….thanks, Bo-di,” Zhan sighed in relief.

”Where’s my thank you gift?” Yibo smirked.

”How about I give it to you when we get home?” Zhan chuckled.

”No, I want it now!” Yibo pouted.

Zhan shook his head but leaned forward and placed a kiss on Yibo’s cheek. Yibo turned his face to show Zhan his other cheek which Zhan kissed with a laugh as well. Yibo then turned his face to Zhan and puckered his lips and waited. 

”Wang Yibo!” Zhan slapped Yibo’s face gently and pushed him away. “Stop it!”

”I need my thank you gift, ge….I helped you so much!”

Zhan pinched Yibo’s cheek and then leaned in and kissed his lips. It was meant to be a chaste kiss but Yibo quickly wrapped his arms around Zhan’s waist and pulled him closer. Zhan let out a soft yelp as Yibo immediately deepened the kiss, running his hands all over his body. 

”Didi,” Zhan breathed and gulped as Yibo sucked on his lips and then trailed kisses down Zhan’s neck. “Let’s go home...we don't have the things here…”

”Mmm,” Yibo mumbled. “Can't control...just need a taste…,” he spoke in between kisses and nibbles.

”Didi…,” Zhan sighed as Yibo turned his attention to his throat.

”Mmm…,” Yibo continued making his way up Zhan’s neck and licking his favorite spot below his ear.

”Didi...we should...ahh,” Zhan hissed as Yibo groped his ass and bit down on his neck, “...we should go home…”

Their bodies were plastered against each, Zhan moaning, Yibo exploring, when suddenly they heard the door open. They jumped apart just in time as they heard the click of heels enter and in came Zhan’s manager.

”Oh...Wang Yibo?” She paused mid-step when she saw the boys standing at the other end of the studio near the mirrored wall. “I didn't know you would be here,” she spoke in a calm and collected way which threw Zhan off.

”He’s here to help with the choreography...you know...I still need to fix some parts and Yibo here is a…”

”Great dancer…,” she finished his sentence and tilted her head to one side, eyeing them carefully.

”Hmm, exactly,” Zhan replied in as calm as a tone as hers. “So what are you doing here?”

”Thought I’d bring you some coffee since you’re rehearsing late...and go over some important...never mind,” she walked to them and handed him the coffee cup. “I can see you’re busy. Good luck with your...rehearsal,” she slowly ran her eyes over Zhan’s face and hair. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

After she left and closed the door behind her, Zhan and Yibo let out a breath they didn't know they had been holding. Zhan looked at Yibo in silence and Yibo returned his gaze. After a few seconds of silence, Yibo managed a small smile and massaged Zhan's arm.

"It's okay, ge....nothing bad happened. Although, that was close," he chuckled.

"Hmm," Zhan looked down at the floor and then the door, "that was too close."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Xiao Zhan new years performance rehearsal video -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cE0n8D8S6Ug  
> (Timestamp 0:19 - XZ waist, you’re welcome)


	223. Happy 2020

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the love for Chapter 2 of my Chef!Xiao Zhan and Idol!Wang Yibo AU - [Chef's kiss](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24098911)

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Your stage rehearsal is so good, didi!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I didn't know you were going with a water theme!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: And were going to dance in it  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It’s so cool...I’m doing a fire theme on my stage!!  
>    
>  Yibo: I know, ge...I did it on purpose _😏 😎 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Candy for our cp fans _😛 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Didi! You’re crazy!  
>    
>  Yibo: Also, have you seen our cp online?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: No, why?  
>    
>  Yibo: It’s blown up...they’re going crazy after the Tencent event!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: But why?  
>    
>  Yibo: Look at the pics from the event, ge!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Oh my god! Didi!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: There’s almost no photo where you’re not looking at me!  
>    
>  Yibo: Hey! It’s not just me….the same goes for you!  
>    
>  Yibo: We were BOTH just talking to each other  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: You’re right...this was...too much  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: We need to be more careful  
>    
>  Yibo: Why? We were just talking  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Didi...have you seen all the fan analysis of our lips?!?!!?  
>    
>  Yibo: Yeah _😏 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: It’s nothing to be smug about! I can't believe I was so reckless  
>    
>  Yibo: It was hot  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: But reckless  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: And I was reckless when I let you come over to the studio to help me rehearse  
>    
>  Yibo: Did something happen with your manager?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: No...but it’s just...we’re getting careless  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Anyway, I have to go now for rehearsals.  
>    
>  Yibo: Good luck, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: I love you_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: I love you too, didi _

Yibo looked at his phone, suddenly uneasy. 

_Is Zhan-ge right? Are we becoming reckless? Even my manager bugged me about how all the focus was on us instead of Zhao Liying and me._

But before he could think about it any longer, his choreographer called out to him and he returned to rehearsing for his New years performance.

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Didi!!!! You did it!!!!  
>    
>  Yibo: Thanks, ge….I’m so nervous  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Don’t be! Your song is selling like the hottest thing in town!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Which it is!  
>    
>  Yibo: Thanks, ge!! I can't believe I wrote and put out a song of my own!!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’m so proud of you didi! The song, your rap...it’s so hot!  
>    
>  Yibo: How hot?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Bo-di!  
>    
>  Yibo: How hot?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: So hot I want you to fuck me right here in my car.  
>    
>  _

Yibo gasped and dropped his phone and was at the receiving end of a weird look from his manager.

”Everything okay?” His manager asked.

”Hmm,” Yibo gulped and nodded as he picked up his phone hurriedly.

> _Yibo: Fuck, ge...you made me drop my phone...now my manager is looking at me all weird.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: You asked for it!  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes, yes I did...when the fuck are you getting home tonight?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Late, very late unfortunately  
>    
>  Yibo: I’ll wait up  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Maybe this time we can use the vibrator on me….  
>    
>  Yibo: Fuck. _

* * *

Finally, it was New years eve and Zhan was excited for his first new year stage ever. He had several performances lined up but he was the most excited for his set to ‘Magic’, a song by his favorite artist. It was going to be a huge surprise for his fans, seeing him sing and dance like he used to during his X-Nine days.

The only thing that made him sad was that he wouldn't be able to bring in new years with Yibo. Not only were they on different stages but also in different cities. 

_I couldn't bring in new years with him last year either. I met him only the morning after!_ Zhan frowned. _I should do something special for him when we are both home!_

”Come on, Zhan-Zhan,” Na Ying’s voice interrupted his thoughts. “You’re on next...good luck!!”

With a hug by Na Ying, Zhan made his way to the stage, pumping his fist in the air, ready to take the stage by storm. Several kilometers away, Yibo was pumping himself up backstage as he readied himself for his performance. As they both stepped onto the stage with their cues, one thought passed through both their minds.

_Good luck, Zhan-ge._

_Good luck, Bo-di._

* * *

”Zhan-Zhan!!” A loud deep voice caught Zhan’s attention as everyone gathered on stage for the new year countdown.

”Ayunga!” Zhan exclaimed and hugged him and smiled at Zheng Yunlong as they joined him. 

But before any more words could be exchanged, the host announced the start of the countdown. He stood beside Na Ying while Ayunga and Yunlong stood closely behind them. 

Zhan held his hand out and counted down alongside Na Ying, laughing, giggling, and enjoying the moment. When the countdown ended, they all yelled out in unison and Zhan felt a wave of gratitude and joy wash over him.

He startled, however, when there was a burst of confetti and glitter that rained down on them. He looked up at the falling shiny stars and began thinking of his own lonely star who was several kilometers away. 

_Happy new year, didi...here’s to living in love and harmony. Here's to many many many more years together. Here's to all our firsts that are yet to come. Happy 2020._

* * *

Yibo stood beside his TTXS brothers on the caravan that was travelling around the stadium, waving at the cheering crowd. This time, everywhere he looked were signs with his name on it. He remembered how lonely he had felt last time when there were none. He remembered how sad and dejected he had felt as he had gone back to the room that night.

He remembered how Zhan had left his family early the next morning and shown up at his door just to comfort him. As he waved and smiled and sang into the mic, Yibo could feel his absence more strongly with every passing minute and then, he made up his mind.

When everyone yelled as the clock struck midnight Yibo smiled wide and hugged his brothers and greeted everyone. He bowed and shook hands with all the other hosts and turned his attention back to the audience. He could hear them chanting his name and he felt a sense of pride and accomplishment.

_Zhan-ge was by my side when there was no one in the audience for me. I wish he was here. I wish he could see how right he was. I wish he could share this moment with me. Happy new year, Zhan-ge. Here's to another year of peace and harmony. Here's to our love and life together. Happy 2020._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Xiao Zhan New year both performances -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBS5kJI0BBM
> 
> XZ focus fancam for the Magic dance -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g50cdf-wXk0
> 
> XZ and Lay Yixing duet at the new year gala -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQtlCBDliHU
> 
> XZ singing Laughter of the sea (the song he and Yibo sang together on TTXS), although I’m not sure if this was also at the new year gala or another event -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6jkVdkEyatE
> 
> Yibo new year dance performance -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jWKsOqu4iQ
> 
> Yibo new year dance fancam -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F9YVtKen2_E 
> 
> Yibo official Wugan lyrics video -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-WeU9aWArE
> 
> Wugan english translation -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaRzDMK6DfM
> 
> XZ new year countdown -  
> https://youtu.be/aUcilPyRIQU?t=5


	224. Everything is fine

* * *

Zhan tossed and turned in bed. He was exhausted from the new year gala but somehow he wasn't able to fall asleep. It didn't help that he was in an empty hotel room all alone, without Yibo to cuddle with, instead of their warm home on the first day of the new year. He glanced at the time on his phone.

_6:13 am. Fuck. I need to leave in less than an hour!_

Zhan groaned and threw his blanket off, kicking his long legs about in frustration. He sat up eventually and looked around the room blankly. With a sigh he got out of bed and walked over to the window. He sat there gazing at the sunrise and was lost in his thoughts for a long time. As he gazed at the disappearing moon, he was surprised when his phone began to ring.

Zhan’s eyes widened when he saw who the caller was.

”Bo-di!?” Zhan exclaimed in glee. “Why are you up so late? Couldn't sleep either?”

”Yep, couldn't bear to sleep on the first night of this year without you in my arms.”

”Me too, “Zhan sighed and leaned against the window sill. “I miss you so much…all I wanted when the clock struck twelve was to hug you and kiss you.”

”I missed you too...so why don't you tell me which room you’re in so I can come up and hug you and kiss you.”

”What?!” Zhan stood up straight and exclaimed abruptly. 

”I’m here, ge,” Zhan could hear the smile in Yibo’s voice.

”520! 520!” Zhan blurted. 

”I love you too, ge but what’s your room num...”

”My room number is 520!! Now get your ass up here...now!!”

”Oh,” Yibo chuckled. “Coming.”

Zhan flung the door open and poked his head, looking on either side impatiently. Several minutes later, Yibo emerged from around the corner and Zhan’s entire face lit up. 

Yibo jogged towards his room and Zhan, unable to keep his patience, dashed towards him. As soon as he reached Yibo, he threw his arm around Yibo’s neck and wrapped himself around him. Yibo grinned and wrapped his arms around Zhan’s thin waist, pulling him closer.

”You came,” Zhan nuzzled against Yibo’s neck and tightened his grip on him.

”Of course I came,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s shoulder. “Thought I’d surprise you like you surprised me last time.”

”Mmm,” Zhan hummed as he cuddled into Yibo.

”Ge, we should really go inside...remember? No more reckless behaviour.”

”Oh!” Zhan pulled back immediately and glanced about the empty corridor. “Yeah,” he grabbed Yibo by the wrist and pulled him along until they were safe inside.

As soon as Yibo shut the door behind him, Zhan pounced on him. He pushed him against the door and grabbed him by the hair, his lips locked with Yibo’s, his tongue barging in, his breaths already hot and heavy.

”Looks like someone missed me a lot,” Yibo smiled into the kiss and let Zhan have his way, giving back as good as he was getting.

”I missed you so much,” Zhan managed to speak when they parted to catch their breath before latching onto Yibo again.

”I missed you too,” Yibo ran his hands down Zhan’s back and tightened them around Zhan’s waist again.

He walked them in backwards and when they reached the bed, gently pushed Zhan back onto it. He crawled on top of him, without parting their lips for even a moment.

Zhan lay back and held Yibo close. When Yibo pulled back, he looked at Zhan carefully and brushed the hair on his forehead aside. He smiled down at him and caressed Zhan’s cheek.

”Happy new year, ge,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s nose.

”Happy new year, didi,” Zhan pulled Yibo in for a hug and they stayed in each other’s embrace for several minutes.

”I’m so glad you’re here...but,” Zhan glanced at the clock, “I have to get ready and leave in fifteen minutes…sorry,” he looked at him guiltily.

”It’s okay, ge...I just wanted to see you and hug you and wish you in person...and I came here straight from the gala but maybe we can make those fifteen minutes count, in other ways,” Yibo smirked and leaned in, kissing his way down Zhan’s cheek to his neck.

Zhan sighed and moaned, arching his neck to give Yibo better access. Just then, his phone rang. Zhan glanced at it and it was his manager. He ignored the call and let it go to voicemail.

Zhan adjusted his body under Yibo as he kissed a trail down Zhan’s chest, lifting his shirt up to leave wet kisses on his stomach. Zhan giggled when Yibo nibbled around his stomach in a ticklish way and blew a raspberry kiss on his skin.

”Bo-di!!” Zhan exclaimed and wiggled under Yibo’s grip. 

Yibo grinned and gave him more raspberry kisses and nibbles until Zhan could take it no more.

”Stop! Stop! I give up...please!”

A knock on the door abruptly ended Zhan’s laughter. He froze and looked in the direction of the door, immediately sitting up.

”It could be my manager...hide in the bathroom,” Zhan stood up urgently. 

”Relax...I ordered some food at the reception….it could be that… but yeah….I’ll go in to be safe…”

Zhan nodded and hurried to the door. He straightened his hair and shirt and then slowly opened the door. To his immense relief it was a staff member with a tray of all his favorite baked goods.

Yibo reappeared when Zhan closed the door and called out to him.

”Thank you!”

”Break your diet for now, I got two of everything.” Yibo grinned.

They sat on the couch and Zhan took a photo of the plate of delicious goods, immediately posting it online. As they cuddled and ate, Yibo’s eyes fell on Zhan’s sweatshirt that was draped on the couch.

”I want that,” he said casually as he took another bite.

”My pink hoodie? But you don't like wearing pink!”

”I want it,” he shrugged.

”Fine,” Zhan rolled his eyes. “But why?”

”I just feel all...pink,” Yibo smiled and kissed Zhan’s cheek.

Once again, Zhan’s phone lit up with a call from his manager and Zhan ignored it resolutely. He was about to silence his phone when Yibo stopped him.

”It must be urgent if she’s calling more than once. Answer it,” Yibo handed him the phone.

”But you...we just have a little time and… you came here all the way and…”

”It’s okay, ge,,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s forehead and smiled. “Now answer it.”

Zhan nodded and swiped the screen to answer the call.

”Hello?”

Yibo watched as Zhan’s face turned into a mild frown.

”But don't I have a few more minutes?”

The creases on Zhan’s forehead deepened as he frowned more.

”What? Why?”

Zhan’s frown turned into a scowl. Yibo instinctively reached out and massaged Zhan’s arm to calm him down and Zhan gave him a small smile and Yibo noticed his shoulders relax slightly.

”What? Who’s here?”

Zhan sat up in shock, his eyes wide and his mouth open in disbelief. 

”What could be so important?”

Now Yibo began to worry as well. He held Zhan’s other hand and massaged it with his thumb gently.

”Fine...okay...I…I’ll be there.”

When Zhan ended the call, he took in a deep inhale and massaged his temples.

”I’m sorry didi….I have to leave as soon as possible...something’s come up apparently. I don't know much but she said it was very important.” Zhan looked at Yibo apologetically.

”It’s okay, ge. Don’t apologize.” 

”I think you should leave too...just to be safe…,” Zhan bit his lips, nervous about Yibo’s reaction. “Plus check out is in two hours.”

”That’s fine...my flight back is in a few hours as well...I just came to...see you,” Yibo shrugged and smiled.

Zhan looked at Yibo with a teary smile. He placed one hand on his cheek and leaned forward to place a long, loving kiss on Yibo’s lips.

”You’re the sweetest boyfriend ever,” Zhan whispered as he rested his forehead against his.

Tears slid down Zhan’s face and he wiped them off quickly.

“Is everything okay?” Yibo looked at him in concern.

Zhan took one look at Yibo’s worried face and put on a smile and intertwined their fingers.

”Don't worry...everything is fine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The said photos of the food, two of each item, and the pink sweatshirt which was odd because Yibo has been known to avoid pink (on TTXS when they made him wear a pink apron or at the Sina interview where XZ took the blue hand fan and Yibo had to take the pink one) -
> 
> https://twitter.com/MayXian3/status/1211282220310126592
> 
> Also these photos were actually taken on the day after the Tencent awards and it was suspected that Yizhan spent the time after the event together (cough ahem cough). I just put it after New years for the sake of my plot.
> 
> Also, once on TTXS, when Yibo was asked what it's like to be in love, he said everything is pink. *squeals in yizhan*


	225. I know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3 of my Chef!Xiao Zhan and Idol!Wang Yibo AU - [Chef's kiss ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24098911) \- is now out!!!

* * *

With one final kiss, Zhan and Yibo parted ways. Zhan walked down the stairs to the first floor while Yibo took the elevator all the way to the parking lot to meet his bodyguard and car.

Zhan’s face grew grim as he neared the conference room his manager had asked him to meet her at. With a long sigh, he straightened his shoulders and opened the door. As soon as he took a step inside, Zhan froze in his spot. Beside his manager, sat another familiar figure. The President of Wajijiwa - Long Danni.

”Hello, Xiao Zhan,” Long Danni smiled and gestured to the seat opposite her. “Come in. Have a seat.”

Zhan bowed and composed himself from his initial shock. He gave them a small polite small and sat down in front of the two women.

”It’s nice to see you, Danni-laoshi,” Zhan began as calmly as he could. “What brings you here?”

”Some very urgent business. I need to have a discussion with you…”

”What about? You know we can’t discuss certain matters without the presence of our lawyers,” Zhan spoke respectfully, yet firmly.

”I am well aware of _that_ ,” Long Danni’s face steeled for a second before resuming the smile. “It’s probably for the best that the lawyers aren’t present for this though.”

Something in her tone sent a chill down Zhan’s spine. He tried to maintain a neutral expression but his mind was racing to figure what she could possibly be here for, suddenly and unannounced. 

_Is this about the lawsuit? Is this my annual review? Is she going to create further obstacles in my career?!_

”I suggest you get comfortable, A-Zhan,” Long Danni sat back in her seat. “This might take a while.”

”Can it wait? I have work commitments today.” Zhan tried to make up an excuse.

”Your manager has rescheduled those. This meeting is more important.”

Zhan glanced at his manager who was looking away resolutely and focusing on her phone, typing away.

”Alright,” Zhan sat back. “What _is_ this about?”

* * *

When Yibo landed in Beijing, there was still no message from Zhan.

_It’s been a few hours. I wonder why he hasn't messaged. Maybe he had to go to work straight from the meeting._

Thus placating himself, Yibo got into his car and was taken straight to Yuehua where he had his annual review meeting with the Yuehua CEO, Du Hua. When he arrived at the office, he went through his usual routine and grabbed something to eat for lunch, and then relaxed in the lounge.

Ten minutes later, the door opened and his manager announced that Du Hua was ready to meet with him. As he walked towards her, he sensed some nervousness in her demeanour. A sudden uneasy feeling came over Yibo as he thought about his impending meeting.

_Is this about the annual review? Did I do something wrong? Does she have some complaints? Have some of my projects been shelved?_

When he entered the room, he was greeted by his CEO, Du Hua, in her usual calm and collected manner. But this time there was no smile. His nerves began to fire up as he walked towards her desk.

”Ah, Yibo,” she came forward and patted Yibo’s arm.

 _No hug?_ Yibo’s brain observed.

”Du-Mama,” Yibo gathered himself and smiled. 

Yibo thought he saw a crack in her composed expression but he couldn't read it and it vanished just as quickly as it had appeared.

”Sit,” she gestured. “Do you want something to drink? Have you eaten?”

”I’m good, thanks...just had lunch,” Yibo began to calm down as her motherly nature appeared once again.

Du Hua had always been like a mother figure to Yibo and the other trainees. She was always ready with a smile, words of encouragement and comfort, and most importantly, a fierce and unconditional protectiveness for her young trainees.

Yibo’s initial uneasiness disappeared when she sat down and asked his manager to sit down as well. She smiled at him kindly and sat back in her chair. 

”You have done well, Yibo,” Du Hua opened a file and browsed through it. “Very well...I’m so proud of you...all your hard work is paying off.”

”Thank you, Du-mama,” Yibo smiled sheepishly but accepted the compliment. 

”I have no complaints,” she went on, “but I do have something very important to discuss,” her face grew grim.

* * *

”What!?” Zhan stared at Long Danni, his mouth agape in disbelief at what he had just heard. "What did you just say? I am hiding something from you?"

”You heard me correctly. And don't even try to lie. Just the lawsuit in itself has marred our reputation in this industry. We can't allow this. It has gone on long enough.”

Zhan looked at his manager but she kept her gaze fixed on her phone. Long Danni, on noticing this, spoke up once again.

”Don’t look at her. What do _you_ have to say about this?”

”The lawsuit is a legitimate course of action I was forced to take for very valid reasons and you know that. Everything else is unfounded.” Zhan stood up ready to leave.

”Sit down, Xiao Zhan,” Long Danni spoke sternly yet quietly. “I am not finished yet.”

Zhan sat down again and huffed.

”What else is there to say. You have said what you wanted. And I am saying it is unfounded and a joke. I can't believe you!”

”The thing is,” Long Danni placed her elbows on the desk and leaned forward. “I don't think it’s a joke. I have very good reasons to believe it is true. And I don't think you should lie to me anymore.”

”Well, I am telling you one more time,” Zhan leaned forward as well, “that this is a preposterous insinuation. I will not give this conversation any more of my time because there is nothing else left to discuss.”

”Is that so? You leave me no choice. Looks like I’ll have to spell it out for you. And you won't like what you hear.”

”Get to the point,” Zhan began losing his patience and his cordiality.

”I know, Xiao Zhan.” Long Danni assumed a poker face.

”Know what?” Zhan matched her expression with his own unreadable face.

”I know about you and Wang Yibo.”

* * *

”Wha...what do you want to discuss?” Yibo stuttered, his apprehension returning.

Du Hua walked over to his side of the desk and sat at its edge.

”Tell me, Yibo...have I not taken care of you since you were 13?”

Yibo nodded.

”Have I not treated you and the other trainees as my own children?”

Yibo nodded again.

”And have I ever mistreated you, taken advantage of you, or given you any reason to not trust me?”

”N...no, Du-mama...never,” Yibo shook his head vigorously. “Why are you asking me this? Have I done something to upset you?”

”Yes, you have.” Du Hua crossed her arms across her chest and sighed. “I am very upset with you. Not only have you been reckless but you have also broken my trust...”

”Me? How?” Yibo felt his heart race and he glanced at his manager who was looking at him with a look of concern and pity.

”By lying to me.”

”I...Du-mama, I haven't lied to you.” Yibo’s voice grew soft and hesitant as he glanced from one to the other repeatedly.

”You’re doing it again.”

”What have I lied to you about?” Yibo finally gathered the courage to ask and braced himself.

”You know our rules. You know how the industry works. And yet you have kept such an important thing hidden from me.”

Yibo looked at her helplessly, his entire body going numb.

”You know exactly what I’m talking about, don't you? 

Once again, even though his brain was caving, Yibo took one last shot of hope and shook his head.

”Fine. We’ll do it your way then,” she walked back to her chair and took a seat. “I know, Wang Yibo.”

”Kno...know what, Du-mama?”

Du Hua sighed and looked at Yibo intently.

”Are you or are you not in a relationship with Xiao Zhan?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimers:  
> \- I do not endorse the judgement that women who don't smile as much are not friendly or amicable.  
> \- I don't know how either of these women are in real life. All I know is they are killing it in an industry mostly dominated by men.  
> \- The only reason I am showing them in whatever light I will show them is for the sake of my plot and is complete fiction.
> 
> Just a reminder - XZ's lawsuit against Wajijiwa is real and was filed in 2019. Stay tuned, I will include updates on that in the next few chapters.
> 
> * * *
> 
> Du Hua interviews (summary: she seems very smiley and amicable, she is like a mother to her trainees, they call her du-mama, she praises wang yibo a lot) -  
> https://twitter.com/zhengtingbae/status/982563187940667392?lang=en  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmrj0R5I0Ic  
> https://twitter.com/SgWangyibo/status/1258626694274904066  
> https://twitter.com/uniq5s/status/1258633300362444801  
> https://twitter.com/uniq5s/status/1258642967465652225  
> https://twitter.com/uniq5s/status/1258646008570900485
> 
> Long Danni photo -  
> https://www.gettyimages.com/detail/news-photo/wajijiwa-entertainment-president-long-danni-speaks-during-a-news-photo/1021725144
> 
> Long Danni intro on X-fire (she is in all black, short hair)-  
> https://youtu.be/84ZkkrdRHyg?t=242  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84ZkkrdRHyg&feature=youtu.be&t=329
> 
> Long Danni feedback on XZ first time on X-fire -  
> https://youtu.be/84ZkkrdRHyg?t=3228


	226. Don't even bother

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 4 of my Chef!Xiao Zhan and Idol!Wang Yibo AU - [Chef's kiss ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24098911) \- is out!!!
> 
> Also!!! Finished my first submission for the BJYX Prompt Fest - ["A game of chicken"](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjyx_fest/works/24222661)

* * *

”Are you or are you not in a relationship with Xiao Zhan?”

Before Yibo could remember to school his expression, his eyes widened and he stared at Du Hua, his mouth agape. For several seconds, he couldn't find his voice or any words. He looked at her, feeling a mix of many emotions - shock, nervousness, guilt, and most of all fear.

”Your face says it all,” Dua Hua sighed and leaned back, resting her head on the chair.

”Du-mama….,” Yibo finally spoke. “I...it’s not...I…”

”Out of respect for both me and your relationship, don’t lie about this anymore Wang Yibo!” Du Hua exclaimed and sat back up.

Yibo had never heard her raise her voice before. He flinched a little, and looked at his manager who was now looking down, and readied himself for the inevitable. At that moment, he didn't know if he was accepting his fate or resigning himself to it. But whatever it was, a sense of calm and peace took over Yibo. 

He was prepared for the worst.

 _If this means the end of my career. So be it. Nothing is more important than Zhan-ge._ Yibo took a deep breath and looked at Du Hua.

”Yes. I am in a relationship with Xiao Zhan. Go ahead,” he resumed his stoic face. “Do it.”

”Do what?”

”Whatever you called me here to do…do your worst.”

”What do you think I called you here for?!?”

”Threaten my career? End my contract?”

”Are you for real?! You crazy child!! Wang Yibo!!”

Yibo looked at her, astonished and perplexed.

”Wha...what?”

”I don't want to end your _career_!”

”Oh...so that’s how it is...I am going to make this very clear…,” Yibo stood up, angered and fierce. “I will not end my relationship with Xiao Zhan.”

* * *

”I know about you and Wang Yibo.” Long Danni spoke quietly and calmly.

Xiao Zhan froze.

Long Danni’s smile widened. She knew she had Zhan exactly where she wanted him. She clasped her palms together and leaned forward on her elbows. 

”I see you’re not denying it…”

”I...I…” Zhan’s mind raced for a response.

”Don’t even bother, Xiao Zhan.” Long Danni’s smile turned smug.

Zhan grit his teeth in frustration at himself. He looked straight at his manager and frowned. But then a sense of peace and calm overtook him. It was as if a giant weight had been finally lifted. He was face to face with his worst nightmare but at least now he could deal with it and get it over with, instead of living in fear of it.

”Fine...” Was all Zhan said.

”Fine what?” Long Danni asked with a small smile.

”You tell me,” Zhan continued to play her game of ambiguity.

Long Danni frowned and glanced at the manager.

”Alright then, if you want me to come out and say it...I have been informed,” she turned her attention back to Zhan, “that you are in a relationship with Wang Yibo.”

”And?” Zhan asked, maintaining a neutral, if slightly smug face, knowing he wasn’t giving Long Danni the reaction she had hoped for.

”Is there anything else that is needed? I think this is enough to…” she smirked.

”To?” Zhan raised his eyebrows with a cocky smile. “Please go on...what is it you intend to do?”

Long Danni frowned again but then, gritting her teeth and finally losing her composure, she looked at Zhan with a threatening face.

”I will out you, unless you give me what I want.”

* * *

”Wang Yibo!” Du Hua sighed and shook her head. “Sit down. You silly boy.”

Du Hua began laughing helplessly as she rolled her eyes and looked at the manager and then back at Yibo.

”Is that all you think of me after all these years?

Yibo looked at her in utter confusion.

”I’m mad at you for not trusting me with this information earlier. I’m mad at you for hiding this and risking everything so recklessly. I’m mad at you for not realizing that I love you like family, unconditionally. Do you not get it? It is better for us to know this than for us to not know. We can protect you.”

Yibo sat in silence, stunned to his very core. His mind was unable to process her words. He gaped at her and his manager who now looked more at ease as well.

”Don't look at her...she was doing her job…,” Du Hua’s voice had lost its edge.

”Du-mama…” Yibo began mumbling.

Du Hua walked over to Yibo and knelt by his side. She placed one hand on his cheek and smiled.

”I’m not going to lie. I wasn't pleased at first. I am not happy with the complications you have brought upon yourself. But I have to respect your life choices and can't control that. All I can do is support you and be smart about how we handle this moving forward.”

Yibo still had no words. But his eyes were welling up. Before he knew it, he was hugging Du Hua and silently letting his tears out and letting go of the breath he had been holding.

”Thanks Du-mama,” Yibo whispered.

”I’m glad you found happiness...next time, don't hide anything from us. By the way, technically you breached your contract by keeping this from us,” she pulled back and feigned a stern face, “but I’ll let it pass this time.”

Yibo chuckled and nodded, wiping his tears. He sighed and looked at his manager again who walked towards him finally.

”I’m sorry,” she began, “I was worried we wouldn't be able to handle it alone if something got out.”

”It’s okay...I guess you did the right thing after all,” Yibo shrugged. “How about next time you give me a heads up?”

”Sure,” she smiled and relaxed. 

”Good...this is good,” Yibo’s smile grew. “Everything should be fine now on.”

* * *

”What?!” Zhan finally lost his composure, caving in and letting Long Danni have the upper hand.

”I will out you, unless you give me what I want.”

Zhan's mind raced faster and faster and her words echoed in his head. He was at a dead end. He felt like there was no way out. He tried hard, digging in every direction, to find a way. Any way. Anything to counter her attack. He felt the familiar tightening of his chest but resolved to keep strong and face this head on.

”So what do you want?” Zhan asked quietly, trying to control his breathing that was growing shallower every minute.

”It’s simple. Withdraw your lawsuit against us or else we will have no option but to terminate your contract and you will have to pay the penalty fees", she paused and smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I don't hate or know much about these women in real life. This is all for the plot. And also, to the people who were able to predict some of this --- I hate you LOL.


	227. It's simple

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finished my first submission for the BJYX Prompt Fest - ["A game of chicken"](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjyx_fest/works/24222661)
> 
> Also, I am such an idiot. I just made a minor change to the end of the previous chapter because I posted an old draft and gave too much away at the end FML. But anyway hope this chapter is still enjoyable!

* * *

”It’s simple.” Long Danni fixed her eyes on Zhan. “Withdraw your lawsuit against us or else we will have no option but to terminate your contract and you will have to pay the penalty fees,” she smiled.

Zhan looked up at her in disbelief. But something in her words had stirred a pot of anger and self confidence and he stood up with new found strength.

”I am the biggest and highest earning star Wajijiwa has right now. 

Zhan felt a sense of triumph when he saw the smile on her face falter just the slightest. 

”Terminate me if you want…” Zhan went on, “I will pay your penalty fee!!” 

Long Danni’s smile faded.

”Do you think your threats will scare me? I’ve come into this industry as a normal average person who had a normal education, a normal job, a normal life. I am not scared of losing this and going back to that.”

Long Danni frowned.

”You have done nothing to help my career. I have built everything myself...on my own blood, sweat, and tears. And you can't take anything away from me. I will walk away from all of this myself before caving to your demands. Lawsuit be damned. Penalty fees be damned. Your entire company be damned!!”

Zhan slammed his palms on the table and seethed with anger. He rejoiced internally on seeing the flash of nervousness and bewilderment on Long Danni’s face.

”So,” Zhan stood up straight and straightened his clothes and collar, “if that is all...I will take your leave. And you can do as you wish. Do your worst.”

Zhan turned around to leave and had almost turned the knob to open the door when Long Danni’s low voice spoke.

”Be careful what you ask for, Xiao Zhan…”

His confidence diminished ever so slightly when he turned around and saw Long Danni sit back in her seat and eye him silently as if choosing her next words carefully.

”What...what do you mean?” Zhan steeled himself for more threats to his career.

”Surely you know what I mean….” she spoke finally, “we will have to state the reason for the termination…when we do it.”

Xiao Zhan’s breathing grew heavy and his heart raced.

”And of course I would never want to but you give me no choice. I can’t lie in the court of law. So I would have to tell them the truth….”

Zhan stared at her, willing away the horrible thoughts that circled in his mind.

”...that the reason we are terminating your contract is due to your immoral behaviour and illegitimate relations with Wang Yibo.”

* * *

Yibo walked out of Du Hua’s office lighthearted and cheery. He made his way home and texted Zhan.

> _Yibo: Zhan-ge! Call me as soon as you see this!  
>    
>  Yibo: I have some really good news!  
>    
>  _

Yibo’s smile turned into a frown, however, when he saw the time and realized it had been hours since Zhan had gone for his meeting. There was no reply, no missed calls, nothing. 

_It must be a very serious conversation._ Yibo pursed his lips. _I wonder what it’s about. Hopefully they aren’t giving him a hard time again! Those morons don't deserve Zhan-ge! I should do something to cheer him up when he’s back!_

__

Suddenly, an idea struck Yibo and his eyes lit up. His entire face softened and his eyes welled up at the thought and his heart fluttered. He picked up his phone and made a call.

”Mom? I need some help!!!” He smiled as he spoke eagerly.

”No No,” he continued in response. “I’m fine. Don't worry….yes mom...even Zhan-ge is fine….just listen to me!!!”

“I need a favor...and I can't do it myself because if someone sees me, it’ll be all over the internet but you could do it for me instead?”

”Okay, okay...I’m getting to the point...I want you to buy me a ring.”

”What do you mean why?! Why do you think I need a ring, mom!?” Yibo rolled his eyes.

”Yes, ma!” He smiled shyly. “That’s exactly what I need it for.”

”Okay, I have to go…,” he rushed to end the conversation. “I’ll text you the details later. I have to make another call now.”

Yibo hurriedly dialed another number excitedly.

”Hello...aunty...hi...yes it’s me….” Yibo began, suddenly nervous.

”I missed you too, aunty...“

”Don't worry….we are fine...I just...I just…I’m calling for something else...umm...I wanted to…I needed a favor...I want you to buy a ring that will fit Zhan-ge's ring finger.”

* * *

Xiao Zhan froze. Immediate terror filled his entire body and mind and felt his legs turn into jelly. He clutched the edge of the table to steady himself. His throat went dry and his mind was a jumble of incoherent thoughts and fears.

”You...you wouldn't…”

”Oh, but I would,” Long Danni smirked. “I’m sure Yuehua would not be happy either with such a...relationship.”

At the thought of their relationship ruining not just his but also Yibo’s career, Zhan’s belief in his commitment to putting the relationship above everything else faltered.

His mind raced as he grappled with the implication of her words. His head hurt as he imagined the repercussions of her actions on his Yibo. He felt his resolve collapsing when he thought of Yibo not only being fired from Yuehua but never being able to dance or act or even race ever again.

He shuddered at the thought of Yibo being ridiculed, attacked, ruined, even unsafe because of the actions of his company. And he would be helpless and unable to do anything to protect him.

Except he could. He could do something to protect him. He remembered his promise to Yibo that he would never do something extreme in order to protect him. But now that the situation was upon him, now that he had to make a decision, he was not sure of anything anymore.

How was he supposed to choose between his relationship and Yibo’s career. How could he take a step that would ruin the love of his life. How was he supposed to know if he could trust that she wouldn't blackmail him at every stage of his career now that she knew. How could he be sure that she would honor her word.

Zhan looked down and shut his eyes. He saw the image of Yibo in tears. Yibo bidding goodbye to his dance, to his acting, to his reputation, to the life he had worked so hard to build. 

Zhan’s resolve crumbled. Everything came crashing down. And his mind narrowed down to one thought and one thought alone. And he felt that he had no other option. He had truly reached a dead end.

”So...have you made up your mind yet or do you need more convincing?” Long Danni smirked.

Zhan looked at her and felt the back of his eyes burn.

His mind had come to a complete halt.

_I’ll do anything to protect Yibo. Anything._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Details (not official) about XZ withdrawing his lawsuit in Jan (yep, he really did withdraw it, reasons not clear, hopefully he was able to negotiate a good deal with Wajijiwa) -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ilgvLuWzCb0


	228. And one more thing

* * *

Zhan sat down, exhausted and heartbroken. He lowered his head in resignation.

”I have to go to another meeting,” Long Danni spoke. So you only have ten more minutes to give me your answer.”

Zhan looked up and reigned in his tears.

”And don't forget...a big company like Yuehua kicking him out...his career would never recover.”

Suddenly, a spark went off in Zhan’s head. His breathing paused as his brain restarted and honed in on her words. His gears started turning as the fog in his mind began clearing.

”Five more minutes,” she tapped her finger on the table.

Zhan looked up and took a long, deep breath.

”No.”

”No?” Long Danni raised an eyebrow.

”No.”

”Alright then,” Long Danni got up with a long exhale. “I guess I know what I have to do then.”

As she began leaving the room, Zhan spoke in a low but sure voice.

”You wouldn't dare…” Zhan turned around and faced her, expressionless but firm.

”I wouldn't?” She looked at him, amused.

“I know you won't do that...you wouldn't risk your relations with a company as big as Yuehua.”

Long Danni’s smile faltered.

”Wajijiwa can't afford that.”

Zhan looked at Long Danni and then at his manager who was standing in the corner of the room, now with a nervous expression on her face.

”That’s not true,” Long Danni began but Zhan could hear the slight quiver in her voice.

“Without rock-solid proof, coming at their shining star with such strong allegations...there is no way you could take that risk. I’m calling your bluff,” Zhan stood up and looked her straight in the eye. 

For several seconds, neither spoke. But Zhan could see her brain working at breakneck speed, assessing her options. His expression finally gave way and a relief washed over his entire body.

”So…,” he sat back down, “if it’s a deal you want...we will make a deal. But on my terms.”

Long Danni walked back and sat opposite him, her expression cold and stoic.

”I’m listening.”

”Here’s my offer…I will withdraw the lawsuit,” Zhan clenched his fist under the table, still unsure of what other tricks she had up her sleeve, “ _but_ I have some conditions…that I want in writing…”

”Fine...go on…”

”I want to hire a manager of my choosing…,” he tested the waters slowly, his gaze fixed on his manager who was shrivelling in one corner.

”Done.” Long Danni replied without hesitation.

I want more freedom,” Zhan began feeling confident, “in the projects I choose and more control over my schedule…”

”Okay...but...then our commission will go up from 35% to 50%.” She raised an eyebrow.

”40.” Zhan spoke in a steely voice, trying his luck.

”45.”

”Fine,” Zhan agreed in resignation but relieved when it dawned on him that in the end, she was doing this for money and not out of spite.

”If that’s all then,” Long Danni began to stand up.

”I am not done yet,” Zhan stopped her sternly.

With clenched teeth, she sat down again and waited.

”I want all of this written and signed in my new contract…”

”Sure.”

”And one more thing.”

”What’s that?”

”Never...and I mean NEVER again...will you bring up Wang Yibo...he stays out of all this. I want my contract to state specifically that neither me nor my partner, Wang Yibo, will ever be blackmailed using the knowledge of our relationship. I will have my lawyers make sure of these new clauses. Understood?”

”I can agree to that…”

”Good...because if you try to drag us through the dirt…,” Zhan leaned forward, placing his hands on the desk, “I will not hesitate to drag you through even more dirt...you will not only lose your only shining star that’s making you more money than you can imagine...but you will lose all your reputation...if you make me lose mine...if you make Wang Yibo lose his. If we go down, we’re taking you down with us.”

”You can be rest assured, Xiao Zhan,” she leaned forward as well, “I do what is best for my business. And this deal...is good for both of us.”

She extended her hand and smirked.

Zhan stood up, not accepting the handshake, and without another word, left the room.

* * *

As soon as Zhan reached his hotel room, he fell to his knees clutching his chest. His breathing grew out of control and sweat began pouring down his temples. He shut his eyes tightly and willed himself to calm down. He could hear Yibo’s loving voice whispering to him.

_Just remember to breathe, Zhan-ge. Just remember to breathe. Can you do that for me?_

”Yes,” Zhan whispered as he tried to take in a deep breath. “Yes, I can.”

Zhan took in a few more broken breaths before his chest began loosening. He sat down slowly as his breathing grew even and finally rested his head against the door, heaving a sigh of relief.

Everything inside him went silent. His mind couldn't believe everything that had just happened. How close he had gotten to his worst nightmare. How close he had gotten to making a very very bad decision. And maybe he still hadn't made a very smart decision by agreeing to withdraw the lawsuit and the raised commission but at that time, he would have given her everything she wanted if it assured him that Yibo would never get hurt.

_Nothing matters. No amount of money in the world is more important than him. I would have given her all of it if needed._

A shiver ran down Zhan’s spine as his mind went over the meeting repeatedly. He shuddered and chastised himself for having even allowed himself to think of leaving Yibo when Long Danni had threatened to let the cat out of the bag.

Zhan pulled out his phone and fumbled with it as he dialed Yibo. All he needed in that moment was to hear his voice and ground himself in it.

”Zhan-ge!! Finally!” Yibo exclaimed as soon as he answered the call. “Where have you been?! I tried calling and texting!!”

”Hi, didi,” Zhan spoke softly trying to keep his voice steady, as he found comfort and solace in Yibo’s lively and warm voice. “Sorry, the meeting….went long.”

”Zhan-ge? Are you okay? You sound tired. What was the meeting about?” Zhan could hear the growing concern in his voice.

”Just a very long annual review,” Zhan decided to not reveal and rehash the conversation with Long Danni over a phone call.

”Oh...okay...I know what’ll cheer you up! Wanna know some good news!?”

”Yes, please…I could use some good news.”

Yibo went on to inform Zhan of his entire meeting with Du Hua. Zhan’s eyes widened and his expressions ranged from shock to surprise to disbelief to amazement. By the time Yibo was done, Zhan’s jaw had dropped to the floor.

”Wow…I...I...don't even know what to say...I’m so relieved….so happy for you, didi.”

”Me too!!! I just wanna hug you so bad!! I guess I can in two more days! But I am so happy, ge! Everything will be okay now!”

Zhan smiled tiredly and ran a hand through his hair. He looked at his phone screen that held Yibo’s contact photo and placed a light kiss on it.

”Yes, didi...everything will be okay now. Everything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if the direction I took this in disappointed y'all but I'm in no place right now to deal with heavy angst. Plus, I think XZ is strong and smart and won't cave easily without a fight!


	229. Where do I need to sign?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My first submission for the BJYX prompt fest - ["A game of chicken"](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjyx_fest/works/24222661)
> 
> Some people have asked me what "gay chicken" means. Yizhan (who in that story still think they're straight during the filming of Untamed) keep challenging each other with very gay challenges (giving the excuse of their characters) to see who would back down first. The game gets very competitive of course and escalates quickly.
> 
> If you want to know what happened and who wins the game, go read the story above. Hehe!

* * *

> _Bo-di: Zhan-ge!! Where are you? You should have been home by now  
>    
>  Bo-di: Your flight landed hours ago!  
>    
>  Zhan: Sorry, didi...had some tire trouble. I’ll be there soon_ 😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Oh...okay...come soon!_ 😘 _  
>   
>  _

Zhan smiled to himself as he put his phone in his pocket. He looked around the sophisticated formal office-like room he was seated in at the moment and adjusted his collar nervously. He felt a slight guilt at having lied to Yibo but before he could dwell on it, a suited man was approaching him. He stood up and shook hands with the gentleman.

”Thank you so much for doing this on such short notice,” Zhan smiled apologetically. 

”Not a problem...this is a very important matter...and you’re my nephew’s college friend after all.”

”And thank you for the discretion. This is a very sensitive issue and I wanted to make sure it was handled well.”

”It’s completely understandable, given the position you’re in. I’m glad I could be of help.”

”Where do I need to sign?”

”Just here and then we will be done with the formalities.”

Zhan nodded and then, feeling a wave of relief, took the man’s leave. When he got back to the car, he smiled and for the first time since his conversation with Wajijiwa, he felt pure joy and reassurance that things were indeed going to be okay. He felt like he had taken charge of things and was in control of his life again. 

* * *

”Zhan-ge!!” Yibo ran towards the tired man as soon as he entered the house.

”Hi, sweetie,” Zhan smiled as Yibo ran into his arms and hugged him tightly. 

After a few seconds of embracing, Zhan chuckled and kissed Yibo’s temple.

”You’re kinda crushing me, Bo-di.”

”I’m just really happy to see you,” Yibo pulled back a little and faced Zhan.

”We just saw each other two days ago,” Zhan rubbed his nose against Yibo’s.

”Okay, ever since my conversation with Du-mama, I’ve been feeling like a hundred kilos lighter! I’ve felt so so so happy ever since!” Yibo exclaimed as he pulled back.

Zhan’s smile faltered just a bit but he schooled his expression immediately. Yibo, however, didn't miss the subtle expression.

”What? You don't seem as excited.” Yibo eyed Zhan.

”No, of course I am, sweetie,” Zhan held Yibo’s chin. “I’m just tired.”

Zhan maintained his hold on Yibo’s chin and smiled. He leaned in and closed the gap between them, sealing their lips together. Yibo wrapped his arms around Zhan’s neck as Zhan pulled him close, immediately deepening the kiss but suddenly, Yibo pulled away with an unsure look.

”What is it, ge? You’re not just tired...something’s up...I can tell…you seemed off when we video chatted too.”

”Nothing, Bo-di...I…”

”Don't lie to me, ge,” Yibo pulled back completely and looked at Zhan with a deepening frown. “I can tell.”

Zhan huffed and rubbed his forehead.

”Can I at least come in before you start grilling me?” Zhan tried to smile lightly.

”Hmm,” Yibo nodded and led the way in. “Sorry...I’m sorry...I just...you look…”

”How about I take a shower first? I really am tired.”

Yibo pursed his lips but then nodded and conceded.

”Okay, but then we'll talk about it right after!” He called out as Zhan disappeared into the bathroom.

* * *

When Zhan was done with his long shower, Yibo had set dinner. They ate together catching up on Yibo’s day. Zhan remained silent throughout except for the occasional hums of approval and nods.

”Okay,” Yibo put his chopsticks down. “Your turn…”

”Huh?”

”You’re not yourself. You’ve been...different over the last two days and you look...so distant even now. What is going on, ge?”

”Didi...it’s just the stress of the annual review...you know how things are with Wajijiwa...and my schedule...that’s...that’s all,” Zhan pushed his plate aside.

Yibo stared at Zhan for several seconds in silence. Zhan picked up the plates and headed to the kitchen. He was washing the dishes slowly when a pair of arms wrapped themselves around his waist. 

”Hey…” Yibo whispered.

”Hmm,” Zhan pressed his elbows into Yibo’s arms and continued washing the dishes.

”I love you,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s shoulder.

”I love you too.” Zhan whispered as he wiped down the last dish.

”Then don't hide from me,” Yibo turned Zhan around after he was done and placed a hand on his cheek.

Zhan looked into Yibo’s earnest eyes and sighed. He bit his lips and leaned back against the kitchen sink.

”What’s going on, ge?” Yibo asked softly. “What’s bothering you?”

Zhan shook his head and managed a small smile.

”Nothing, didi...everything is okay now.”

”But what had happened?”

Zhan remained silent, unsure of how much to reveal. He didn't want to trouble Yibo with more details than were necessary.

”Don't overthink it, ge...I’m your partner...we’re in this together…equally. What is it?”

”Fine,” Zhan let out a long exhale and hung his head. “Long Danni and my manager know about us.”

”What?!” Yibo’s eyes widened. “How...how did they…”

”I guess my manager was onto us…” Zhan shrugged. “And of course she’s more loyal to the company than to me…”

”So...so what happened? What did they do? How is everything...okay?” Yibo asked Zhan suspiciously.

”I...negotiated with them.”

”What did they want?”

”Don't worry...they won't be able to harm us...they will never be able to harm you.”

”What did they want, ge?”

”They threatened me that they would out us…”

”Oh!” Yibo covered his mouth in shock.

”But they won't...they can't anymore…I made sure of it,” Zhan added hastily and held Yibo’s shoulders. “Don't worry.”

”What did you...agree to.” A frown began appearing on his face.

”I...I…”

”Ge?”

”I dropped the lawsuit.”

”What?!? How could you...they’ve been so unfair to you...this is your career at stake!” Yibo exclaimed.

”This was my relationship at stake!” Zhan blurted abruptly. “I don't care about anything else.”

”Ge…” Yibo eyed him worriedly. “What were the terms of negotiation?”

”Yibo,” Zhan sighed and caressed his cheek, “it’s all done now…I promise it’s all okay.”

”If it’s all okay, then tell me what you negotiated.” Yibo scowled deeply.

”I told her I would withdraw the lawsuit but I also...I know she would never come at you and Yuehua so recklessly if she wants to stay in this industry. So I made a deal. I fired my manager and asked for more freedom in my career and of course made sure she would never threaten you again.”

”That’s...that’s good,” Yibo relaxed a little. “And she just agreed?”

”Well, she knew I knew she was bluffing.” Zhan shrugged.

”Ge…she wanted something else too, didn't she? That's not the entire truth. What else did she ask for?”

"That's all, Bo-di," Zhan replied meekly. "I...I..."

"I can't believe you're trying to lie to me." Yibo grit his teeth and began walking away.

"No! Wait," Zhan grabbed Yibo's arm and turned him back to face him. "It's not a big deal. Please don't be mad."

"If it's not a big deal...tell me. What did she want?"

”All she wants is money, Bo-di,” Zhan sighed as he caved. “And I don't care about that stuff.”

”How much?” Yibo clenched his fists.

”Forty five percent.” Zhan looked down and mumbled.

”That’s nearly half your earnings?!?” Yibo stepped away and exclaimed in anger. “Ge...they’re leeching off you.”

”I don't care,” Zhan pulled him closer and wrapped his arms around him, resting his face in the crook of his neck. “I was so scared. I was so worried about you,” Zhan began to unravel. “I could see the end when she said she would out us. I thought I would have to end everything and I got scared. I would give it all up if I had to….I just couldn't….I couldn't risk you getting hurt,” Zhan sobbed.

”Hey...shh,” Yibo held Zhan tightly and massaged his back. “It’s okay.”

”Yibo...I don't care about money...I made sure that she can never hurt us again. I promise.”

”Ge,” Yibo whispered soothingly. “I know...I trust you. I trust you. It’s okay. I’m okay.”

Zhan cried profusely and let his tears flow freely. Yibo showered him with kisses and wiped his tears away slowly, patiently, until the only thing left was Zhan’s soft sniffles.

”Are you mad?” Zhan asked Yibo.

”Not at you,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s nose and smiled. “I just wish...I wish there was something I could do. Are you okay?”

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded and wiped his nose. “But this also means...we need to be more careful now. I still don't know what else she may have up her sleeve… ”

”We will.” Yibo nodded gently.

”We have the Weibo event coming up soon…”

”Du-mama told me the same thing...that we should lay low now, especially since we need to start shifting attention from us to our other projects.”

”Okay…,” Zhan stood up straight with a long exhale and wiped his cheeks. “We can do this….it’s all under control.”

”Yes it is,” Yibo lifted Zhan’s hands to his lips and kissed them. “It’s alright now.”

”I’m exhausted...I’m so tired of them.”

”I know,” Yibo massaged Zhan’s back. “But I’m here...with you...right by your side...we’re in this together.”

Zhan wiped his tears but they didn't stop.

”Hey,” Yibo smiled and whispered. “Guess my favorite number.”

”I don't know…” Zhan grinned back.

”520,” Yibo wiped Zhan’s cheek.

”520.” Zhan whispered back and sealed their lips together.

As Zhan deepened the kiss, a sudden thought entered Yibo’s mind. He pulled back and stared at Zhan with a strange look on his face.

”What?” Zhan asked.

”You said you thought you would have to end everything… “ Yibo narrowed his eyes.

”Huh?” Zhan began to get nervous.

”When she threatened to reveal our relationship...you said you thought you would have to end everything. What did you mean?”

”Noth...nothing…” Zhan bit his lips and felt his breathing grow shallower.

”Xiao Zhan,” Yibo gasped. “Did you mean...were you thinking of ending our relationship?” His eyes widened. “Did you want to break up with me?”


	230. This is all wrong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters 5 and 6 of my Chef!Xiao Zhan and Idol!Wang Yibo AU - [Chef's kiss ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24098911) \- are out!!!
> 
> Also, my story about a series of gay challenges between a "straight" yibo and "straight" xiao zhan is out - ["A game of chicken"](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjyx_fest/works/24222661)

* * *

“Did you want to break up with me?”

Yibo looked at Zhan in disbelief, his eyes wide and his mouth agape.

”Answer me!” Yibo took a step back and exclaimed when there was no response from Zhan. 

Zhan looked down, nervous and ashamed. He bit his lips, unable to come up with the courage to reply to Yibo. His mind relived the exact moment the thought had crossed his mind. He shuddered involuntarily at the memory.

”You did, didn't you?” Yibo’s voice lowered and Zhan could hear the horror and hurt in it.

Zhan looked up and felt his entire body shudder when he saw the blank look on Yibo’s face. He knew Yibo had his defenses up. But he didn't miss the pain in his eyes. The eyes that expressed everything that his face didn't.

”You were going to break up with me…” Yibo repeated as the realization sunk in.

When Zhan still didn't speak, Yibo felt his heart sink to his feet. His heart stopped beating and his entire body grew heavy. He turned away to leave the kitchen, unable to look at Zhan anymore.

”No, Yibo! Wait!” Zhan grabbed Yibo’s arm to stop him from leaving. “I...I...it’s not like that…”

”Then tell me what it’s like…” Yibo clenched his teeth and pulled his arm out of Zhan’s grip.

”Yibo...I…” Zhan began but couldn't find the right words.

”It’s a simple yes or no, Zhan-ge!” Yibo snapped. “Did you think of breaking up with me?”

Zhan shut his eyes and took a deep breath.

”Yes…” he opened his eyes and looked at Yibo urgently, “but it’s not what it sounds like…” he reached out for him.

Yibo’s eyes turned red and he jerked away from Zhan and stormed out of the kitchen. Zhan cursed inwardly and ran a hand through his hair.

”Xiao Zhan, you idiot,” he shook his head and muttered to himself. 

He rushed outside and saw Yibo walking upstairs, heading to their room. Zhan ran up after him and managed to catch up just as Yibo entered their bedroom.

”Yibo, wait!” Zhan darted forward but before he could say anything more or follow him inside, Yibo slammed the door in his face.

Zhan placed his palm on the door and sighed. He could hear shuffling sounds and he knew Yibo was probably pacing back and forth, enraged.

”Yibo… please hear me out… “

No response came and the shuffling sounds continued.

”Bo-di…” Zhan’s voice grew softer. “Please don't be mad at me. I… “ Zhan hesitated. “I was just… scared. For you.”

The shuffling sounds stopped but no reply came. Zhan rested his forehead against the door.

”When she said she would out us, the first thing that crossed my mind was you. Of how it would affect you…”

Yibo still didn't say anything in response. Zhan turned around and rested his back against the door.

“I’m not proud of it. But in that moment I did...I did let myself think of letting you go to protect you.”

No sooner had the words left Zhan’s mouth that he heard something slam inside. He jumped at the loud sound and knew it was Yibo venting on the furniture.

”Didi! Sweetie! Please…” Zhan begged. “Try and understand. It was the only thing I could think of in that desperate moment.”

Yibo still didn't say anything but Zhan could hear some sounds coming from the room although he couldn't make them out clearly. But at least the slamming had stopped.

Zhan leaned his head back against the door and went on.

”But I wouldn't have gone through with it, didi….there’s no way I could have done it.” Zhan continued softly, his tone apologetic yet firm.

The rummaging sounds continued but no reply came.

”I promised you, didn't I?” Zhan spoke. “That I would never make that decision for you? I haven't forgotten that promise. You can protect yourself, I know that.”

There was absolute silence in the room after that. No reply, no movement, and the door remained shut. Zhan sank to the ground and let out a long exhale.

”I’m sorry...I know it was wrong to even think that.” Zhan brushed aside a small tear and paused. “I promise you it wasn't something I actually wanted to do. You have to believe me, didi. I am very very sorry.”

Then with a long sigh, he hung his head low. Zhan sat there alone, in silence, as there was no sound from the room for several minutes. For a brief second, his mind thought the worst and he stood up abruptly.

_Is he...is he going to break up with me!? Is he going to leave me?_

”Yibo!” Zhan knocked on the door. “Yibo! Please say something, didi… “

_No… no… I can't lose him over this… this is so… this is all wrong…this can't be it…not now when I…_

Zhan’s body sprung to life and he ran to the study. He flung himself at a drawer in his desk and then ran back out to the bedroom again, all in a matter of seconds. By the time he was back outside the shut door, he was panting and sweating. Suddenly the door flung open and Yibo stood there, upset and teary eyed.

”Yibo…” Zhan whispered and took a step inside but Yibo retreated away from him.

”You don't get it,” Yibo spoke in a low, hurt voice. “You just don't get it.”

”Don't get what, didi?”

”The fact that you can even think about breaking up means you can imagine a life without me… that I’m an option in your life.”

”Of course not!!” Zhan exclaimed and rushed towards Yibo.

But Yibo stepped further in, away from Zhan.

”You are NOT just an option. You are not disposable. And I cannot imagine a life without you. As soon as I thought about it, my heart crumbled to pieces thinking that it was the only choice I had left. But I would never...never have acted on it, didi… trust me… it was out of fear… just an impulsive thought when she threatened me with you.”

Yibo didn't move. Tears gushed down his face. He looked at Zhan accusingly, feeling betrayed and defeated.

”I’m sorry… I never meant to hurt you… and I never ever intended on actually breaking up with you.”

”But what if you couldn't find a way out that time? What would you have done then? What if she comes up with something else next time?”

Zhan remained silent for a while and Yibo’s rage and hurt deepened.

“You actually think ending this...our relationship...could be a solution to a problem we knew we would face one day.” He spoke through clenched teeth. 

”No, didi…that’s not it…I just...I…”

”You what!?” Yibo snapped.

”I realized I was willing to give up everything for you…” Zhan stated slowly. “I realized I would’ve sacrificed it all for you. But… but I didn't know if… ”

”You didn't know if I would?” Yibo raised an eyebrow, his breathing growing shallower by the second.

”I wasn't sure if you could let go of your career… I mean this is what you’ve been doing since you were a child. This is your whole life. I came from a normal life…I can do the normal 9-5 job… but this is…”

”This is my life… and I get to choose what to do with it.”

”I know…I’m sorry…I know…but I am… ”

”You’re not in this one hundred percent, Xiao Zhan.”

Zhan froze. He stared at Yibo, a heat slowly rising in his body. Before he knew what he was doing, he moved his hand that had thus far been behind his back and brought it up front. Yibo’s eyes followed his movement and when he saw Zhan’s hand, his expression changed.


	231. Definitely not like this

* * *

Yibo’s eyes followed Zhan’s movement and when he saw his hand, his expression changed.

"What's that?" Yibo managed to find his voice as he stared at Zhan’s hand.

"Proof that I'm in one hundred percent." Zhan spoke softly but firmly.

"Papers?" Yibo finally dragged his eyes back up to Zhan’s face.

"My new contract. With all the new clauses. Including the one that says that they can never harm my partner, Wang Yibo, ever again." Zhan met Yibo’s gaze.

"You… you put that in the official contract?" Yibo’s eyes widened.

"Yes." Zhan nodded.

Zhan held the papers out for Yibo who finally took a step closer and took them from him. He began reading the contract carefully and slowly. With each page his heart raced as he saw with his own eyes how much of a clamp they had on Zhan's neck. He paced back and forth as he read the new conditions Zhan had laid out including the increased pay cuts and commission stipulations. 

His heart stopped, as did his steps, when he saw the line that Zhan mentioned. 

_...Xiao Zhan's life partner, Wang Yibo…_

Yibo froze at the words. 

_...Xiao Zhan's life partner, Wang Yibo…_

_...life partner…_

He blinked at the words, not knowing what to make of them. 

"Ge," Yibo began to turn back towards Zhan as he read and reread the line, "this...this says...it says…"

Yibo looked up from the document and this time his heart completely stopped. There in front of him, was Zhan. Down on one knee. 

”It says my life partner, Wang Yibo,” Zhan stated with a soft smile on his face. 

Zhan took hold of Yibo’s hand and kissed the back of it. 

”Wang Yibo…” Zhan took a deep breath and then went on, “…I love you. I am so helplessly and hopelessly in love with you. I fell in love with you when it was the last thing I wanted or expected. I was powerless. Before I could even know what hit me, you had all my heart. ”

Zhan held onto Yibo’s hand firmly with one hand and met Yibo’s stunned gaze.

”And while falling in love with you was not a decision I made, being in a relationship with you was. Beginning a life together was. Asking you to move in with me was. Getting a home together was. Everything I’ve done since I fell in love with you was a decision. A decision I made with eyes wide open. Wanting every second of it with all my heart.”

“People say you either follow your heart or your mind. But both my mind and heart are filled with only you, Wang Yibo. All of me chose you. I choose you. I will always choose you. Even when things are tough. Even when things aren’t going our way. Even when it’s hard to choose us. I will always always always choose us.”

”I _am_ in one hundred percent, my love. I always have been…do you remember when we were at that lighthouse in Greece? And we saw that shooting star? Do you know what I wished for?”

Yibo shook his head, still dazed, eyes moist.

”I wished for nothing.” Zhan smiled and shrugged. “Because I had everything I wanted with me right there. I thanked the universe for that. And I asked it to grant you whatever you wished for. That’s all I want…ever. For you to get everything you ever want. And I will do everything in my power to give you everything you want. To keep you happy. To keep you safe. To make sure you are always loved. ”

Yibo’s lips quivered and tears slid down his cheeks.

”Wang Yibo,” Zhan paused and held his breath. “You are my star. My asteri. And today I want to wish upon you.”

He pulled out an object from his pocket and held the shining ring up for Yibo to see.

”Will you marry me?” Zhan smiled radiantly.

”No.”

Zhan’s smile faltered and his heart skipped a beat and he looked at Yibo, unable to decipher his expression.

”No?” Zhan’s voice betrayed a slight tremble.

”No…” an annoyed expression overtook Yibo’s face. 

Zhan was rendered speechless and was about to let go of Yibo’s hand when Yibo spoke again.

“How do you always beat me to this?”

”Huh?”

Yibo dragged a hand down his face and groaned. He walked to the closet and dug in all the way to the back. He retrieved a box and pulled out a ring from it and held it in front of Zhan’s face.

”I was supposed to propose…but not here…not now…and definitely not like this…” he gestured to the room.

”Wha…what?”

Yibo turned their hands around and held Zhan’s hand in his. He knelt in front of him and laughed and shook his head.

”This is so _not_ how this was supposed to go…but then again when has anything with us ever been normal.”

Zhan stared at the ring in Yibo’s hand.

”Looks like we’re both doing this today…” Yibo laughed more.

”You…you were going to…”

”Marry me,” Yibo interrupted Zhan.

Zhan froze at the sudden words. He looked at Yibo who held his gaze, firm and gentle.

”Will you be my husband, Xiao Zhan?”

Zhan remained frozen, unable to grasp the turn of events. 

”You still owe me that Taiwan trip you promised,” Yibo grinned.

They stared at each other, a slow grin appearing on Zhan’s face. He looked around the room - messy, dimly lit, mundane. He looked down at himself - in night clothes, barefoot and sweaty, cheeks stained with tears from their fight. He gazed at Yibo - in night shorts, an overused stretched out t-shirt, and equally tear-stained cheeks.

He began laughing, tears still sliding down his cheeks. He sat back on his heels and let go of Yibo’s hand. He began laughing harder and finally looked up at Yibo who’s shoulders began shaking as well and soon, they both devolved into a fit of laughter.

”Of all the times…“ Zhan giggled.

”We had to do this now…” Yibo covered his mouth to suppress his laughter.

”So anticlimactic…” Zhan covered his face and shook his head.

”It’s your fault…” Yibo clutched his sides as he laughed harder. “Why the fuck did you decide to do it here, now, like this!??”

”I know…I know…” Zhan nodded and wiped the tears that were now from laughter than with the overwhelming emotions he had felt a few moments ago. “Something came over me…”

”And what was that?” Yibo sat back down on the floor as well.

Zhan’s laughter subsided slowly and he looked at Yibo with a thoughtful gaze.

”A strong urge to…”

”A strong urge to?” Yibo asked, still chuckling.

”To make you my fiance.” Zhan spoke evenly, now back on his knees. “To lock you down forever. Officially.”

Yibo sobered up immediately with the words. He watched Zhan hold his hand once more and bring him up to his knees as well. 

”So…Wang Yibo,” Zhan massaged the back of his hand with his thumb. “What do you say? Do you want to make this promise official? Will you be my husband one day?”

Yibo’s heart fluttered but he recovered quickly on seeing Zhan’s loving wide smile. He walked himself forward on his knees until he was mere inches from Zhan’s face and wrapped his arms around his neck.

”I’d be your husband right now this very moment if I could, Xiao Zhan.” He rubbed their noses together.

Zhan blushed and pulled him in for a hug. They held each other close, hugging each other tightly. When they finally pulled back, Zhan caressed Yibo’s cheek and placed a kiss on them.

”I love you.”

”Put the damn ring on me already, Zhan-ge,” Yibo shoved his hand in Zhan’s forcefully and smirked.

Zhan chuckled and shook his head. He kissed the back of Yibo’s hand and slowly slid the ring in. He felt Yibo freeze for a microsecond before relaxing again when Zhan looked up at him.

”Your turn.”

Yibo nodded and took Zhan’s dainty hand in his. He slid the ring on and marveled at the sight of it on Zhan’s finger for several seconds.

”We did it,” he whispered as he stared at the engagement ring on Zhan’s finger. “We made it.”

”We were always going to make it,” Zhan whispered and pulled Yibo’s face up to him by the chin. “There’s no way we wouldn't get here.”

Yibo smiled and let Zhan pull him in closer. He closed his eyes as Zhan closed the remaining distance and sealed their lips together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song I was listening to to get some inspo - it's a beautiful multilingual cover of a whole new world from Aladdin!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmb8_Bh-frg
> 
> References to past chapters -  
> Where they wish on a shooting star - Chapter 81  
> Where XZ beats Yibo to it - Chapter 115
> 
> Also, this story won't have daily updates for now but they will still be frequent! This is mainly because I am working on more stories for the BJYX prompt fest. So don't worry you will still be getting constant Yizhan updates from me. And of course there's the ongoing AU - Chef's kiss!


	232. This is so unexpected

* * *

”Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

”Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!”

Zhan and Yibo dug their fingers into their ears as the shrieking went on for a whole minute straight.

”Bo-boooooooooo!!!!!!!!!”

”Zhan-Zhaaaaannnnnnnn!!!”

Zhan and Yibo shut their ears harder as the screaming escalated.

”Congratulations!!!!!!!” Both mothers screeched and jumped for joy on the other end of the video call.

”Mom!” Yibo opened one eye and looked at the screen. “Can you stop screaming already?”

”Mama!!” Zhan rubbed his temples and groaned. “Please stop shouting.”

”How can we not!?” Zhan’s mother exclaimed with a wide smile.

”Our babies are engaged!!!” Yibo’s mom clapped her hands together in excitement.

On hearing those words, Zhan and Yibo looked at each other and smiled softly. Yibo held Zhan’s hand and ran his thumb over the ring. Zhan smiled shyly and intertwined their fingers.

”This is so unexpected!” Yibo’s mom interrupted their moment. “I thought Bo-Bo was going to propose on Valentine’s day?”

”I was!” Yibo sighed and looked at Zhan, “but Zhan-ge had other ideas apparently.”

”So he got rings as well?!” Her eyes widened.

Yibo nodded and showed them the ring on his finger.

”And what about the one we sent?” Zhan’s mother asked.

Zhan raised his hand to the camera and showed them the ring Yibo had put on him.

”Aww…you two!” Yibo’s mom gushed.

”I’m so happy for you both,” Zhan’s mother cooed.

”What prompted this sudden proposal, Zhan-Zhan?” Yibo’s mom wiggled her eyebrows.

Zhan’s face fell and he gulped, as he recalled the fight they had been having. As if sensing his hesitation, Yibo held his hand and brought it up to his lips.

”Zhan-ge just couldn't wait any more, mom!” Yibo smirked. “Can you blame him? I’m a catch!”

Yibo’s mom rolled her eyes.

”That is true...finally Zhan-Zhan did something sensible!” Zhan’s mother nodded in approval.

”If you ask me,” Yibo’s mom spoke, “Yibo is the lucky one…smart of him to lock Zhan-Zhan down. A brat like him…got an angel like A-Zhan!”

”That’s enough, you both!” Zhan’s father nudged his wife to one side so he could fit in the frame as well.

”Congratulations you two,” he beamed.

”We’re so happy for you,” Yibo’s dad finally got a word in as well. 

”Thanks,” Zhan smiled, “We wish you all were here…to see the new house…to celebrate with us…”

”Maybe in a few weeks, I have a few days off before Legend of Fei resumes…” Yibo scrolled through his calendar. “What about you, Zhan-ge?” 

Zhan pulled out his phone and frowned a little.

”I have some stuff,” he began slowly but then looked up at Yibo with determination on his face, “but I’ll make time for it.”

Yibo smiled and his eyes lit up.

”Okay, that sounds perfect…let us know when exactly and we will be there!” Zhan’s mother exclaimed. 

”Okay, okay,” Yibo spoke hurriedly. “We have to go now.”

”Fine, we can take a hint,” Yibo’s mom grinned. “Enjoy you two! And Zhan-Zhan…welcome to our family…officially.”

Zhan felt the back of his eyes burn and he nodded.

”Thank you, aunty.”

”Ah…that won't do,” she wiggled her finger. “You can call me mom too!”

”Umm…” Zhan blushed. “Okay,” he replied. “Thanks…uhh…mom.”

”And I’ll call you ma!” Yibo grinned wide. “Okay aunty?”

”I’d like that a lot,” Zhan’s mother looked at him fondly.

”Okay, you two…we’ll talk to you later,” Yibo’s mom sighed. “Go have fun!”

* * *

Zhan and Yibo lay in the bed together, on their sides facing each other. Yibo’s hand was on top of Zhan’s and his eyes wandered to the ring every few seconds.

”What are you thinking?” Zhan asked softly.

”How, despite this not going the way I planned, it was still perfect…”

”What had you planned?” Zhan eyed Yibo curiously.

”You really wanna know?” Yibo grinned.

”Hmm,” Zhan nodded enthusiastically.

”Come here,” Yibo turned on his back and pulled Zhan closer.

Zhan snuggled, resting his head in the crook of Yibo’s neck and his hand on his chest.

”Remember how I surprised you on Valentine’s day in Greece?”

”Yeah…you took me to a secluded beach and had a shamiana set up with lights and food and music.” Zhan kissed Yibo’s chest.

”Yeah,” Yibo smiled as he reminisced. “I wanted to recreate that moment on our balcony. I was going to ask for Han-ge’s help to get some props from TTXS and set things up in the balcony.

”Oh…” Zhan’s eyes softened. “That…would have been something…” he smiled. 

”Maybe we should visit Greece sometime when we can…if we can…”

”We should…” Zhan placed a hand on Yibo’s cheek. “We will.”

”So…” Yibo suddenly smirked and rolled Zhan off him and got on top. “How do we celebrate in the meantime.”

”I don't know,” Zhan stretched and laid back, feigning laziness, “I’m kinda tired.”

”Oh,” Yibo sat up, “that’s okay then…”

Zhan laughed and looked at Yibo who was trying to hide his dejection. With one swift motion, he flipped them over and pinned a surprised Yibo down.

”You’re so cute…” Zhan smirked. “And so sweet,” he pecked the corner of Yibo’s lips. “And all mine,” Zhan left a trail of kisses up Yibo’s jawline.

”Mmm,” Yibo hummed as Zhan turned his attention to his lips.

They locked lips and Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo. He pressed their bodies together and deepened the kiss. Yibo purred with pleasure as Zhan explored him lovingly. He tasted Yibo inside out and ran his hands down his sides and began pulling his shirt up.

Yibo let Zhan take his shirt off. Zhan sat up with his knees on either side of Yibo, staring at him.

”What?” Yibo smiled, even as he felt a small blush spread across his face.

”Nothing,” Zhan grinned. “Can't I just stare at my fiance?”

Yibo flushed all the way down his neck.

”Zhan-ge!” He smiled shyly.

Zhan took his shirt off and bent down, caging Yibo with his arms on either side.

”My fiance is the most beautiful man in the world,” he whispered and kissed Yibo’s ear. “I could stare at him all day,” he licked the curve of Yibo’s neck.

Yibo shuddered under his touch. He moaned softly as Zhan kissed his way down. He lavished Yibo’s chest with kisses and nibbles. He poured all his attention on his sensitive spots until Yibo was a writhing mess. 

He pulled Yibo’s shorts off and looked at his erection hungrily. He grabbed the lube and kissed Yibo one more time before making his way down again. With lube on his fingers, he began opening him up. His mouth teased Yibo’s dick and Yibo moaned as he licked the underside and the tip. 

He began scissoring him open and simultaneously took his entire length in his mouth. Yibo groaned as Zhan worked both rapidly, taking him deep and entering him deep each time. 

When Yibo was ready, Zhan lay on top of him, spreading his legs wide. He entered him slowly and both moaned as they finally felt the pleasure they had been craving for days. All the upset, the overwhelming incidents, the conflicting emotions, everything seemed to melt away as their bodies moved together.

”I missed you so much,” Zhan whispered as he rocked back and forth. “I never want to let go of you, Yibo…”

”Then don't…you have me…forever,” Yibo breathed heavily. 

Zhan smiled and took Yibo’s lips in his, thrusting into him, deeper, harder, absorbing all the lewd sounds that escaped his mouth. When he pulled back, he lifted one of Yibo’s legs over his shoulder and raised himself up, supporting himself on one arm.

He towered over Yibo and began ramming into him, angling himself just right to send Yibo spiralling as he hit him in his weak spot again and again.

”Fuck…I love how flexible you are…” Zhan panted as he went in deeper each time.

Yibo threw his head back, clutching the pillow. He lifted his body higher and Zhan sat back on his knees, grabbing him by the hips. He thrust into him after Yibo wrapped both legs around Zhan.

Yibo groaned as Zhan sank his nails into him and rammed in him mercilessly.

”Zhan-ge…” Yibo moaned and bit his lips. “I’m…it’s…too hard…”

Zhan smirked and before Yibo knew what was happening, he had pulled out of him and turned him around. Before Yibo could find his bearings, Zhan thrust into him once more from behind. 

He reached for Yibo’s erection and worked him hard and fast. Yibo dropped his head and shut his eyes with the double pleasure and pretty soon, he was nearing the edge. Zhan felt his body lurch forward as he came all over the bed and Zhan’s hand with a loud moan.

Zhan fucked him through his high, not sparing him even a second. He slapped his ass and groped it as he thrust into him. Yibo matched Zhan’s rhythm even as he felt his knees go weak, held up only by Zhan’s firm grip.

A few minutes later, Zhan grunted and bent forward onto Yibo’s back as he came inside him, filling him up till he was overflowing. Eventually they fell forward onto the bed, Zhan to one side.

He was about to pull out when Yibo held him in place by wrapping one arm around him.

”Stay,” Yibo whispered.

Zhan smiled and spooned him, hugging him closer to his chest. They lay together for several minutes, until Zhan thought he heard a sniffle. Startled, Zhan finally pulled out and turned Yibo over.

”Hey,” his eyes widened when he saw that Yibo’s eyes were moist. “What happened?”

”Promise me you won't ever think of separating again.”

Zhan’s face softened and he kissed Yibo’s shoulder.

”Never.”

”Pinky swear,” Yibo lifted his pinky finger and waited.

Zhan chuckled and intertwined his pinky with Yibo’s.

”I swear.”

”Good.” Yibo grinned as Zhan shook his head and wiped his tears.

Zhan kissed him all over his face and ran his hands down his body, caressing every inch of it. Suddenly felt something against his leg. He looked down and saw Zhan’s partial erection.

”Really, Zhan-ge?” He looked at Zhan in surprise.

”Hey…can you blame me,” Zhan smirked. “I just got engaged to a very hot man.”

Yibo smirked back as Zhan’s hand made its way down to his now erect dick, giving it a gentle tug. His breath hitched as Zhan cupped his balls and raised an eyebrow.

”How about this time,” Zhan bit Yibo’s earlobe. “You fuck me.”


	233. Let it all out

* * *

”How about this time,” Zhan bit Yibo’s earlobe. “You fuck me.”

Yibo’s eyes darkened and he turned around to face Zhan.

”Yeah?”

”Yeah,” Zhan gulped on seeing Yibo’s hungry expression.

Yibo bit his lips as if hesitating to say the next words.

”What?” Zhan tilted his head.

”I…there was something I…wanted to do…”

”What is it?” Zhan raised an eyebrow.

Yibo bit his lower and smiled. He got off the bed and walked to their closet. Zhan stared at his toned ass as he left, curious and confused. Yibo ruffled through their things and reached for something at the back of the closet. He pulled out a box and walked back to the bed..

”There’s something on your list we haven't done yet,” Yibo smirked slightly but Zhan could see the nervousness in his eyes.

”And what is that?” Zhan raised an eyebrow as he sat up on his knees and shuffled over to the edge of the bed towards Yibo.

”You…uhh…you said that you wanted me to…uhh…”

”Hey…” Zhan placed a hand on Yibo’s cheek and smiled, “it’s okay…tell me…what did I want you to do?”

”Choke you.” Yibo whispered and then fell silent as his eyes bore into Zhan, analysing his reaction.

”Oh,” Zhan’s eyes lit up even as his expression slowly morphed into something Yibo couldn't quite read.

”But you don't have to--”

”Show me,” Zhan instructed in a low, deep voice.

Yibo’s breaths grew shallow as he opened the box. He pulled out a black object at the sight of which Zhan’s entire body began heating up. It was a leather collar. Zhan’s breath hitched as he eyed the object, fascinated. 

”What else is in the box?”

Yibo took out the other which was also black but seemed to be bigger and coiled up. He unravelled and Zhan’s eyes widened. It was a leather leash. He gulped and reached out for it with his hand and traced the length of the leash. 

He ran his fingers up and down it and then up Yibo’s arm all the way to the back of his neck. He pulled him closer by the neck and grazed his cheek with his lips before leaning forward to whisper in his ear.

”I love you so fucking much…”

He felt Yibo’s body relax and smiled as he turned his attention to Yibo’s lips. He took his lower lip between his teeth and pulled at it slowly. 

”What do you want to do to me, didi…” Zhan purred.

”I…I want to…I want you to surrender to me.”

Zhan’s eyes darkened and he remained quiet and still for several seconds. Then he bent forward so that he was on all fours and nuzzled his face against Yibo’s hand. Yibo’s mouth parted in surprise when Zhan, still on all fours, looked up at him and stretched his neck upwards.

”Collar me,” Zhan spoke softly.

Yibo was stunned and frozen in his place. When he didn't move, Zhan sat up and waited. Then he licked his way up Yibo’s chest and nuzzled against Yibo’s neck.

”I’m your slave,” Zhan whispered.

Yibo snapped out of his shock and eyed Zhan. On seeing the slight vulnerability in Yibo’s eyes, Zhan placed a hand on his cheek and kissed him. He kissed his way across Yibo’s cheek and whispered in his ear.

”I trust you, didi. And my safe word is red. Do what you want with me, Wang Yibo. Let it all out.”

Yibo came alive with the words. He ran one hand through Zhan’s hair and grabbed it and yanked his head back. Zhan let out a soft gasp when he saw the new confidence in Yibo’s eyes.

”Sit.” Yibo ordered.

Zhan sat back on his heels and waited.

Yibo unbuckled the collar and wrapped it around Zhan’s neck. When he began buckling it in, he could feel Zhan’s throbbing pulse. As he tightened it more and more, he felt Zhan gulp. He paused and looked at Zhan with a questioning look. Zhan nodded and Yibo went on.

When he was satisfied with the compression, he took a step back and admired the view. A very naked Zhan with a very taut black collar around his neck. Yibo marvelled at the sight and he could see Zhan arch his neck to give him a better view.

_There’s that supermodel instinct. He knows his angles._ Yibo smirked.

Yibo walked close to Zhan and held the leash up. He draped it around Zhan’s shoulder and pulled him forward harshly, crashing his lips against him. Zhan whimpered a little as the leather rubbed against his bare skin. 

Yibo pulled Zhan in until their lips were pressed together and began kissing Zhan with fervor. He sucked on his lips passionately and attacked his tongue. He deepened the kiss when Zhan came up for a breath, not sparing him even a second of relief.

When he pulled away, Zhan let out a soft whine and Yibo ran a finger down his face all the way to his neck and tugged on the collar.

”Aah…” Zhan gasped.

Yibo let go of the collar immediately but Zhan shook his head and raised his hand and placed it back on the collar. Yibo gave it another tug, this time harder, and watched as Zhan shut his eyes and both pain and pleasure washed over his face.

His eyes darkened and he held the ring that hung from the collar. He hooked in the leash and gave another tug. This time the collar tightened a little more. He gave a few more experimental pulls on the leash, each time observing Zhan’s reaction carefully.

Finally, he gave it a tug down and Zhan fell forward, bracing himself with his hands on the bed. He was now on all fours, his face levelled at Yibo’s erect dick. He looked up at Yibo with big innocent eyes and waited.

”You know what to do.” Yibo ordered.

Zhan nodded and turned his attention to his erection. He licked it several times from the base to the tip. He played with the head and nibbled and sucked on it. When Yibo pulled the leash, tightening the collar around his neck, he took him in deep and began sucking on his faster and harder.

Yibo groaned as Zhan increased his pace. He hollowed out his mouth and deep-throated Yibo’s length. He nearly gagged but kept going when Yibo yanked on the collar a little. He only stopped when Yibo pulled him back by the leash.

”Turn around and get on all fours,” Yibo commanded.

Zhan did as he was told. As soon as he was in position, Yibo got the lube and began opening him up. He scissored and stretched him open as Zhan moaned into the bed. Occasionally, he pulled him up by the collar and enjoyed watching Zhan sigh in pleasure as his neck turned red.

When Zhan was ready, Yibo pulled him backwards on the bed by the leash and stood behind him. Zhan crawled back and stopped when he felt his ass touch Yibo’s erection. Yibo lined up with him and without any warning, in one swift motion, entered him completely.

Zhan gasped and his body lurched forward but he was yanked back by the leash. Yibo spared him no mercy and began ramming into him, holding the leash with one hand and digging his other hand into Zhan’s hip.

Zhan moaned louder when Yibo pulled on the leash, forcing him to throw his head back and arch his back. Yibo grunted and thrust into him harder at the sight. He went in harder each time and eventually found the spot. 

Zhan nearly collapsed as Yibo rammed into it ruthlessly but was held up by the leash. After several minutes of fucking him roughly, Yibo inched towards the edges of his pleasure. 

”Yibo…” Zhan whined. “I need to…I need you…it’s too hard…”

”You better not come,” Yibo tugged at Zhan. “Not until I say so.”

Zhan grunted and bit his lips as Yibo gave him one final thrust and fell over, panting and breathing heavily. He collapsed onto Zhan and rode his high by grinding into Zhan for several more seconds. When he stood up again, he pulled on the leash and turned Zhan around. 

”Stand up,” he instructed and Zhan stood up on the bed on his knees. 

He unhooked the leash and then scanned Zhan’s body.

”I wanna watch as you make yourself come…”

Zhan whined but then stopped when Yibo wrapped his big hands around Zhan’s neck.

”Do it,” Yibo smirked and pressed Zhan’s neck a little.

Zhan’s breath hitched as Yibo choked him. His hand rushed to his dick and he began tugging at himself hurriedly. 

”Good,” Yibo nodded in approval and began choking Zhan more and licking his lips teasingly. 

Zhan moaned and worked himself harder and faster until he was nearly there. Yibo slid his hand up Zhan’s neck until he was right under his chin. He spread his fingers and tightened his hold severely.

”Now…” Yibo whispered. “Come…”

Zhan choked as he gushed out and came all over. He groaned and felt his body cave but was held up by Yibo, who leaned forward and kissed him through the orgasm.

When he was finally spent, Zhan sighed into Yibo’s mouth. At long last, Yibo let him go and Zhan fell back on the bed with a huff. Several seconds later, Yibo joined him on the bed and sat on top of him, knees on either side.

He towered over Zhan and smiled. He unbuckled the collar and slid it off Zhan’s neck. Zhan opened his eyes and looked at Yibo who was gazing at him fondly. He reached for him and Yibo came closer and kissed Zhan’s cheek. He kissed him all over his face, making his way to his neck.

Yibo licked and caressed and lavished the red line with kisses. He enveloped every inch of the bruise with his lips and left soft damp touches on it.

”Did it hurt too much?” Yibo asked when he slid off Zhan and lay down beside him.

Zhan turned on his side and faced Yibo and shook his head.

“But what about the marks? Don't you have work tomorrow?”

”Just meetings and interviews…I can wear a turtleneck.” Zhan grinned. “Plus, you’ll be gone for the next few weeks…so this will remind me of you.” 

”I’ll fly in for Weibo night,” Yibo smiled back and kissed Zhan’s hand. “That’s in a week.”

”But then you’ll leave directly after that for another shoot,” Zhan pouted.

Yibo lay back and pulled Zhan closer to his chest. Zhan scooted closer and fit against him snugly.

”Did you…like it?” Yibo asked hesitantly.

”A lot,” Zhan smiled and ran his thumb over Yibo’s lower lip.

”Good,” Yibo sighed in relief. 

”I love you, Bo-di,” Zhan whispered and looked up at Yibo with gleaming eyes. “You make me happier than I ever thought I could be.”

”I love you too, ge,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s forehead. “Now I can spend the rest of my life making you happy.”

Zhan hummed and basked in Yibo’s affection.

”We should shower and clean up though,” Yibo finally pulled back.

”Yeah,” Zhan chuckled and then looked at him with a naughty look, “maybe we can go for a quick round three…”

”Zhan-ge!!!”


	234. A small price to pay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter of my Chef!Xiao Zhan and Idol!Wang Yibo AU is out!
> 
> [Chef's kiss](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24098911)
> 
> I am so going to miss these characters. Thank you to everyone who read the story and supported me!

* * *

> _Zhan: Guess who’s at my table at the Tencent white paper event?  
>   
>  Bo-di: Who?? Peng Chu Yue??  
>   
>  Zhan: Oh. My. God. Can you please get over that already? _🙄 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Okay, okay…sorry  
>   
>  Bo-di: Who is it then?  
>   
>  Zhan: Your boss. Du Hua-laoshi  
>   
>  Bo-di: Oh, I didn't know, Du-mama would be there!  
>   
>  Bo-di: Say hi from me!  
>   
>  Zhan: Bo-di, you know I have never spoken to her right?  
>   
>  Bo-di: But you’ve worked with three Yuehua artists!  
>   
>  Zhan: Yeah, but I never had the chance to meet her  
>   
>  Bo-di: Go say hi…she won't bite…plus don't forget she is supportive of our relationship, ge…I’m sure she’ll be nice to you  
>   
>  Zhan: Okay…I’ll try…I don't know why I’m nervous…  
>   
>  Bo-di: Don't be, ge…everyone likes my fiance…just flash your smile!  
>   
>  Zhan: Oh, that reminds me…does she know about us being engaged?  
>   
>  Bo-di: No! Not yet…  
>   
>  Zhan: Okay…I’m gonna go talk to her now  
>   
>  Bo-di: _😘😘😘 _  
>   
> Bo-di: Love you, ge  
>   
>  Zhan: Love you too, sweetie  
>   
>  _

Zhan put his phone back in his jacket pocket and took in a deep breath. He glanced up and noticed that Du Hua was finally done talking to the person beside her. As soon as the person left the table, Du Hua turned towards Zhan and smiled kindly.

”Xiao Zhan!” She spoke first and shifted to the chair beside him. “How are you? Congratulations on all the success! It’s so good to finally meet you in person.”

”Good evening, Du Hua-laoshi…it’s very nice to meet you too. Thank you for your well wishes!”

”You can call me Du-mama too, A-Zhan,” Du Hua leaned in and spoke in a low voice. 

Zhan blushed and nodded.

”A-Zhan,” Du Hua looked at him intently and grew serious. “I know you know how…complicated your situation is and how fragile your position is…” she began softly.

Zhan gulped and looked around, unsure of where the conversation was headed.

”Don't worry…I am not going to try and change your mind,” she chuckled and reached out to place her hand on Zhan’s arm. “All I want to say is…Yibo can be reckless…you have to be the smart one. You have to be more cautious.”

”I…I understand, Du-mama,” Zhan nodded slowly.

”Which is why I think…you two should tone down your interactions at the Weibo awards night.”

Zhan stilled at her words. It took a few seconds to register what she meant.

”We all saw what happened after the Tencent night. You two were all over social media. There was barely any attention on Yibo and Zhao Liying. You know how this industry works. Every new project depends on publicity and cp fanservice.”

”Uhh…yes…yes, Du-mama…of course…I understand.”

”It’s time the focus shifts from you two to other cp’s. And it will help you two as well…lesser eyes on you…less speculation on the nature of your actual relationship.’’

When the event ended, Zhan mulled over her words in the car. His new manager, on noticing how preoccupied he was, couldn't help but check in on him.

”Everything alright, laoban?” She interrupted his thoughts.

”I was just thinking,” he sighed and turned to face her. “About my conversation with Du Hua-laoshi.”

Zhan recounted her words and watched as his manager thought over them carefully.

”So…” he pursed his lips and raised his eyebrows. “What do you think?”

”I see where she is coming from,” she replied. “It’s practical…and important for both of you professionally and maybe even personally.”

”So you think we should keep our distance at the event?”

”I’ll be honest…because that’s what you hired me for. I support your relationship and my loyalty lies with you, laoban. But I think she’s right. It’s high time the yizhan ship cooled down.”

Zhan cleared his throat on hearing her refer to their ship name.

”Sorry,” she curled her lips inward to control her smile. “I mean…the focus has to shift from your cp to the other cp’s in your future projects.”

”Hmm,” Zhan looked out the window and frowned.

”I trust your judgement, laoban. Whatever you do, I will support the decision.”

* * *

”I’m sorry, what?!” Yibo raised his eyebrows and exclaimed.

”Didi…calm down,” Zhan took a step towards Yibo and massaged his arms. “It’s only one night.”

”But…that’s such a stupid idea,” Yibo frowned. “And unnatural. Everyone knows we know each other, everyone has seen how close we are. Won't it look strange if we sit apart and don't talk to each other at all?!”

”It’s a high profile event…everyone is going to be formal. It’s not like the tencent event where everyone is more relaxed and chatty. So it won't stand out as much.”

Yibo’s shoulders sagged and he looked at Zhan, dejected.

”It’s just one night, didi,” Zhan held Yibo’s chin. “Just a few hours. Can you do that for me?”

Yibo pouted and looked away. Zhan sighed and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s waist.

”Sweetie,” Zhan spoke in a gentle, loving voice, “We’ve been so lucky so far. And we finally have the support of our managements…as best as it could be at least…we can do this much for them…especially since your Du-mama requested it.” 

Yibo sighed and turned to look at Zhan. He nodded silently and Zhan pulled him into a warm embrace. 

”It’s not such a big deal,” Zhan whispered and kissed Yibo’s temple. “It’s just a boring award ceremony.”

”But that’s exactly why I want you by my side. So I can chat with you! Plus it’ll be so difficult to see you just a few feet away and not look at you, not talk to you…”

”I know…” Zhan pulled away and kissed Yibo’s nose. “But we can do it…it’s a small price to pay.”

Zhan enveloped Yibo’s lips and held him close. He deepened the kiss and entwined their lips together. Yibo moaned softly as Zhan caressed his cheek and ran his hand down his back.

Zhan sucked on Yibo’s lips and his tongue, he explored every inch of Yibo, leaving him wet, dazed and breathless. When they pulled apart, Zhan planted sloppy kisses all over Yibo’s face. 

Finally, Yibo gave in and smiled.

”There’s the smile I love,” Zhan murmured and planted a small kiss on Yibo’s lips.

”Fine…I’ll do it,” Yibo rolled his eyes but his smile grew wider as Zhan played with his lower lip.

”Good boy,” Zhan teased and laughed when Yibo smacked his arm.

”But I need a big reward for my sacrifice!”

”Only if you are on your best behavior. I’ll reward you after the event,” Zhan brushed aside a strand of Yibo’s hair.

”Okay then,” Yibo let out a long exhale and fiddled with Zhan’s collar.

”My gouzai,” Zhan kissed Yibo’s forehead. “It’s going to be fine. It’s just a few hours at a boring award show. No one’s even going to care.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are now at Jan 7, 2020
> 
> Tencent white paper ceremony - XZ meets Du Hua -  
> https://twitter.com/YiboW13/status/1215323504616398848   
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhan_/status/1214489197286813698 
> 
> XZ has worked with 3 Yuehua artists by this time -  
> https://twitter.com/yiboism0/status/1172329935815368704


	235. I'll make it happen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Yizhan AU!!!! - [Enchanted](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24466354)
> 
> Flower shop owner Yibo and bakery owner Xiao Zhan have their own love language. The question is will they understand each other or not?
> 
> Warning: Tooth-rotting fluffy fluff.

* * *

”It’s just a few minutes…for appearances and some photos…” Zhan whispered into the phone as he made his way to the Headline awards in his car. “You know how it goes…” he glanced at his manager and assistant who seemed to be busy on their phones. 

”Come on, sweetie…don’t be like this…” Zhan lowered his volume further, not wanting the others to hear him struggling to handle Yibo, “she is my co-star for Oath of love…of course we need to do such appearances for publicity.” 

”I’ll be seated with Lay Zhang the rest of the night,” he tried placating Yibo.

”What?! No!” Zhan exclaimed loudly as his words backfired.

Zhan’s eyes widened and he settled into his corner again on seeing the bewildered faces of his team.

“I did NOT have a crush on him! I just liked EXO.” Zhan muttered under his breath into the phone.

He looked at them from the corner of his eyes when he thought he heard them stifle a giggle.

”Sweetie, can we talk about this later?”

”Yibo! Don't cut the call on me like that. Fine! I’ll keep texting you when I’m there.”

”God, why are you so clingy today? Did something happen?”

”It’s not piling up, didi…yes, Yang Zi and me will sit together tonight and at Weibo night too…but that means nothing.”

”Come on, Yibo. You’re being unreasonable. What happened? Why are you so sulky today?”

”I miss you too. You’re the one who’s flying in and out just for the Weibo night, didi. You won’t have time to see me before or after the event.”

”Okay…I promise you that we will get a chance to meet for some time at Weibo night, okay? I’ll make it happen.”

”Wow…you sound so happy now. Was all of this just a ploy to get me to promise you that we’ll meet at the event? Brat.”

”Okay, I’m at the Headline event now…gotta go. Bye.” Zhan covered his mouth over the phone and lowered his voice further. “I love you too.”

With a long sigh, Zhan got out of the car and headed down the red carpet. When he got inside, he was directed to his seat where Yang Zi was already present. He smiled as he approached her and sat down beside her as the photographers went crazy taking their shots.

When the event began, he was directed to another seat beside Lay Zhang. He sat through the event and was kept entertained by Lay Zhang. Every now and then he took his phone out to text Yibo as he had promised.

> _Zhan: How’re you doing, sweetie?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Tired. Ready to sleep.  
>    
>  Bo-di: How’s the event? Still sitting next to her?  
>    
>  Zhan: Didi! Stop it now!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Okay, okay…sorry  
>    
>  Bo-di: And how about Lay Zhang? You happy to be beside him?  
>    
>  Zhan: DIDI! What is going on with you today? You’re clingier than usual.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Sorry, ge  
>    
>  Zhan: Tell me  
>    
>  Bo-di: My management thinks we should do more fan service with others to drive attention away from us to other cp’s  
>    
>  Bo-di: When I said I didn't want to force such things, they said you’re smarter and would agree to this  
>    
>  Bo-di: Will you? Will you do excessive fan service to start another cp?  
>    
>  Zhan: Didi…nothing can replace us and the bond we have  
>    
>  Zhan: We became a cp out of our natural chemistry  
>    
>  Zhan: Every other cp we’re in is because of carefully orchestrated interactions for fan service  
>    
>  Zhan: It’s part of the job  
>    
>  Zhan: I won't go overboard, I promise…but we have to do this…not just to reduce interest in us…but just to promote our other projects in general  
>    
>  Yibo: They want me to interact with Lay Zhang and Jackson Wang on stage at the Weibo awards  
>    
>  Zhan: Oh…wow…and you were getting pissed at me?!  
>    
>  Bo-di: I don't want to do it, but I thought you were going to do it  
>    
>  Zhan: I’m not doing anything, didi…we’re just talking and sitting together and letting them take photos of us  
>    
>  Zhan: And I understand that you need to do the same  
>    
>  Bo-di: Doesn’t it bother you at all?  
>    
>  Zhan: I’m not gonna lie…if I had to sit there and watch you giving excessive fan service with someone else, I would be bothered  
>    
>  Zhan: So I’m gonna make sure I’m not there when you’re on stage with them  
>    
>  Zhan: I trust you  
>    
>  Bo-di: I trust you too, ge  
>    
>  Zhan: Good, we need to get used to this  
>    
>  Zhan: Weibo night is the last event we have scheduled together…after this we may not have any appearances together even if we are at the same event  
>    
>  Bo-di: Hmm  
>    
>  Zhan: Okay, I have to get back to paying attention to the event, okay?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Okay, I love you  
>    
>  Zhan: _😘 

Xiao Zhan sighed and turned his attention back to the event, thankful for the company of Lay Zhang to get him through the night.

* * *

When Zhan got home that night, he was exhausted beyond measure. His face hurt from smiling for the cameras. He moved around slowly and when he finally got in bed, Zhan let out a long sigh and stretched his body.

Just then his phone rang with a video call from Yibo. Zhan answered the call immediately and before he could say anything, was greeted by Yibo’s sleepy face.

”Gege?” Yibo’s groggy voice murmured.

”Hi, sweetie,” Zhan smiled, tired and sleepy. “Did you wait up for me?”

”Hmm,” Yibo lay on his side and adjusted the phone. “Just wanted to see your face,” he smiled but then a yawn caught up with him.

”Well now you’ve seen it, now go sleep.” Zhan turned on his side as well.

”One more minute,” Yibo suppressed another yawn. “I just want to hear your voice.”

”Want me to sing for you?” Zhan snuggled with his pillow.

”Yeah!” Yibo’s face lit up.

”Which song?”

”Kepler…”

Zhan smiled and began humming the familiar tune. He sang the lyrics in a soft, mellow voice that lulled Yibo to a drowsy state once again. And once again, he changed the lyrics at the end to confess his love to the man on the other side of the video call. When he was done, they gazed at each other fondly in comfortable silence.

”I’m sorry, ge.” Yibo finally broke the silence.

”For what?”

”For the way I behaved today…for giving you shit about Yang Zi and Lay Zhang.”

”It’s okay, didi,” Zhan let out a yawn. “Don't think too much about these things…”

”I’ll see you on Weibo night then,” Yibo sighed.

”Hmm…” Zhan nodded. “Catch,” He blew Yibo a flying kiss.

Yibo caught the kiss and planted it on his cheek, prompting Zhan to smile radiantly despite his exhaustion.

”I love you, sweetie,” Zhan caressed the phone screen.

”I love you more, ge.”

”Not possible.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Yizhan AU!!!! - [Enchanted](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24466354)
> 
> Flower shop owner Yibo and bakery owner Xiao Zhan have their own love language. The question is will they understand each other or not?
> 
> Warning: Tooth-rotting fluffy fluff.
> 
> * * *
> 
> Headline awards XZ interactions -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0uJNKLclosM  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c31ccSBlBBw  
> https://twitter.com/mayxian3/status/1214899296161665024?lang=en  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1bu_xxTqgY


	236. I'm leaving now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are now at Jan 11 in my timeline now.

* * *

> _Bo-di: Still stuck in traffic, ge…looks like I’ll be late!  
>    
>  Zhan: How was the flight?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Was fine…can’t wait to see you!  
>    
>  Zhan: Remember, didi…no interaction…not even looking in my direction  
>    
>  Bo-di: Yeah, yeah…I remember_🙄 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: I’ll try and control myself  
>    
>  Zhan: And don't wear the ring  
>    
>  Bo-di: How did you know?  
>    
>  Zhan: I know you, you brat!  
>    
>  Bo-di: _😋😋😋 _Bo-di: You said we’d meet before I leave…  
>    
>  Bo-di: You promised you’d make it happen!  
>    
>  Zhan: Yes, don't worry_😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan: After we receive our award, I am going to excuse myself  
>    
>  Zhan: You can come find me when you’re done with your next award Bo-di: You don't want to see me getting my other award?  
>    
>  Zhan: I don't want to see Lay Zhang flirting with you to move focus off our cp_🙄 _  
>   
>  Zhan: Anyway, once you leave, I’ll head back to the event because I have one more award to receive  
>    
>  Bo-do: Yeah…with Yang Zi…king and queen apparently!  
>    
>  Zhan: Shut up! Do you want to meet me or not?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Yes, ge! Yes! Sorry…I want to!  
>    
>  Zhan: Good boy…I’ll see you soon_😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: _😘 

Zhan put his phone aside as he was shown to his seat. He sat down with a huff and smiled at Yang Zi. As the event progressed, Zhan looked around subtly yet eagerly, waiting to catch a glimpse of Yibo. Twenty minutes later, he caught a movement to his left. His eyes lit up when he noticed Yibo walk in and duck down as he crossed the front row, making his way to his row.

Zhan did his best to school his face, worried that the cameras might pan to him to get his reaction, but he felt a warmth spread inside him on seeing Yibo. Yibo sat down, two seats from him, and Zhan smiled inwardly when Yibo did not throw even a side glance at him.

 _This must be so hard for him. Just like for me._ Zhan sighed. 

Much to his relief, it wasn't long before their award was announced. Zhan stood up and straightened his suit. He made his way out the row and was surprised when he saw Yibo waiting for him before going on stage. 

_This isn't just us getting the award!_ Zhan groaned inwardly. _Why is he looking at me and waiting for me…Bo-di!!_

Yibo began walking when Zhan caught up with him but Zhan resolutely avoided gazing at him and pretended to adjust his suit instead. They walked onto stage and once again, Yibo stood beside him. Zhan let out a discreet sigh and decided to just accept Yibo’s behaviour.

 _At least he isn't looking at me for too long with that dopey lovestruck look on his face._ Zhan trained his eyes onto the person who was handing them their awards.

Over the course of the next several minutes, the host did some activities with the award recipients and Zhan grit his teeth in order to control his smile when Yibo managed to sneak a glance or two at him.

 _What am I going to do with him!_ Zhan sighed internally.

As the activity progressed, Zhan couldn't help but sneak a few glances at Yibo himself.

 _It’s not like I’m any better._ Zhan sighed inwardly. _How can I not look at him when he’s right beside me. And his look today…god damn it…he looks like an innocent virgin! All I can think about is just fucking him senseless. No! I need to focus. Can't think about that now!!_

When they got off stage, Yibo let Zhan enter their row first and Zhan could feel his eyes boring into his back and knew he was probably staring at his ass as discreetly as he could. He walked to his seat and decided it was time to head backstage to avoid watching Yibo getting his next award.

After much explaining and requesting, he managed to retrieve his bottle from his seat and took his leave. As he began walking to leave the row, he couldn't help but glance at Yibo. 

”I’m leaving now,” he whispered.

Yibo nodded subtly. Zhan left, bottle in hand, and made his way backstage. As soon as he found the private restroom at the other end, he texted Yibo. And then he waited. As he waited, his mind couldn't help but wander to what must have been happening on stage at that very moment.

He remembered Yibo’s words. He remembered that Yibo was expected to interact with the other two guys on stage. He knew it wasn't a big deal. He knew it wasn't even going to be romantic. But yet something in him was irked. Irked at the image of others being able to interact with Yibo normally unlike him. Irked that Yibo and he would probably never have the freedom to just be friendly to each other the way they had during the Untamed.

And that hurt. And the hurt turned into irritation. And the irritation turned into anger.

* * *

After getting his second award, Yibo got off stage and returned to his seat. He decided it was best to sit for a few minutes and leave when the lights had dimmed once more. 

_Fuck…how long is long enough to leave without it seeming like I’m following Zhan-ge!?_ Yibo sat restlessly. _It’s been a week! I just wanna hug him…and touch him…and see his smile…and feel his lips._ Yibo smiled at the thought. _He looked so hot in that power suit! God…I want him so bad!_

His mind went to when Lay Zhang had pulled him by the wrist and was glad Zhan wasn’t there to see that.

 _No matter what Zhan-ge says, he wouldn't like seeing someone else hold my wrist._ Yibo smirked.

When he thought enough time had passed he got up to leave. But before he could leave, Du Hua came forward and took the seat in front of him along with Yang Xia, the Untamed producer.

”Ah, Yibo!” Du Hua beamed. “Congratulations on the awards!”

”Thank you, Du-Mama,” Yibo smiled and leaned forward.

”Come, let’s take a photo together,” she gestured. “You too Yang Xia.”

Yibo obliged and they began taking a selfie. Then another, then another, and so on. He looked at the exit impatiently as seconds turned into minutes. Eventually, he spoke up.

”Du-Mama, I actually have to leave now…have a flight to catch.”

”Ah, my hardworking boy,” she smiled kindly.

Yibo took his leave and was immediately followed by his manager.

”Alright, we have one interview before we have to leave for the airport,” she began as she scrolled through her phone impatiently.

”Umm…I need to use the restroom,” Yibo mumbled.

”Okay, sure no problem. There’s one right over…”

”Actually I need to go to the one right at the back,” Yibo drew closer to her and whispered.

”Why…” she began but then paused. “Oh…”

”Please I haven't met him in a week and I’ll be flying out again tonight.”

”Fine!” She groaned. “But I can only give you a few minutes. And…” she added hastily as Yibo began to take off, “be careful. VERY careful!”

Yibo nodded and broke into a jog as he made his way to the place Zhan had texted him.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jan 11 - Weibo awards - Du Hua, Long Danni, Untamed producer  
> https://twitter.com/yiboism0/status/1216247228559450112   
> https://twitter.com/NiFan31472752/status/1217386602114142209 
> 
> Jan 11 - Weibo - Du Hua and Yibo interaction   
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rsHbZDjpAAY
> 
> Jan 11 - Weibo - Du Hua talking to XZ  
> https://twitter.com/YizhanBR/status/1216001067521134592   
> https://twitter.com/ZhanGeBoDi/status/1245429203127996416
> 
> Jan 11 - Weibo - Du Hua talking to XZ and Yibo separately pics -  
> https://www.instagram.com/p/B7aKs6wg2IY/
> 
> Jan 11 - Weibo - Yibo pulled by hand -  
> http://centkent.blogspot.com/2020/01/zhang-yixing-pulls-wang-yibo-by-hand-at.html 
> 
> Weibo awards analysis -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDMEZu-mXss 
> 
> Weibo awards Wang Yibo full cut -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4j_pYwK5Og


	237. This is how it's gonna be now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XIAO ZHAN POSTED AND I AM SO HAPPY ESPECIALLY BECAUSE HE DREW A WHALE WHICH IS MY MOST FAVORITE ANIMAL IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD!!!!
> 
> More info on Xiao Zhan's post -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1268935006690217984  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1268788249348071424  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1268777348205293568
> 
> Also, the travel show he is reportedly going to be appearing on posted an announcement about their upcoming episodes and there is a clue that Xiao Zhan will be showing up (hopefully soon!) -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1268942524489453568
> 
> * * *
> 
> And I have finally organized my Yizhan works into series which you can subscribe to so you get notified every time I add a new Yizhan story -  
> [Yizhan diaries](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1611649)  
> [Yizhan AUs](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1773988)

* * *

”Zhan-ge…” Yibo whispered as he entered the private restroom.

Before he could fully enter, he was pulled in by a hand. Yibo’s body jerked forward and the door was shut and locked. Yibo was pushed back against the door and in the blink of an eye, a set of lips were on his. 

Yibo smiled as the familiar lips devoured him desperately. He clutched the lapels of Zhan’s suit as Zhan licked him thoroughly. Before long, Zhan was kissing his way down Yibo’s neck. He pulled Yibo’s collar down and began sucking on the pale skin.

”Ge…” Yibo breathed, “I have an interview after this…”

”You’re wearing a turtleneck,” Zhan growled. “I’m going to take full advantage of that.”

”Aah…” Yibo moaned as Zhan bit down on the curve of his neck.

”I didn't want to watch your fan service with Lay Zhang…but I couldn't stop thinking about it,” Zhan pulled Yibo’s head back by the hair once he was satisfied with the bruise.

”What did you let him do?” Zhan growled in a low, raspy voice as he rolled his hips into Yibo, rubbing their partial erections together.

”Aahh,” Yibo shut his eyes in pain and pleasure as Zhan kept grinding against him and grabbing at his hair. “Nothing, ge…” 

”You’re lying…” Zhan grit his teeth and let go of Yibo’s hair.

He groped Yibo’s ass and thrust against his hips, hissing with pleasure as their now fully erect dicks rubbed together.

”We just talked…and paired up for the stupid modeling activity on stage.” Yibo breathed heavily, inches from Zhan’s lips.

”And…?”

Yibo gulped and looked at Zhan who was staring at him intensely.

”He…he grabbed my wrist to pull me onto his side on stage…but I made sure he let go as soon as I could,” Yibo added hastily.

”Hmm,” Zhan let go of Yibo and took a step back. 

”Ge…” 

”It’s okay,” Zhan smirked. “It’s not as bad as I was imagining in my head. It’s a good thing I’m friends with him.”

”So…you’re not…mad?” Yibo straightened himself and narrowed his eyes on Zhan.

”No,” Zhan adjusted his jacket and smiled. “And you shouldn't get mad either when I have to do some fan service.”

”Are you really using this to make your point?!” Yibo’s eyes widened in disbelief.

Zhan laughed and walked closer to him and patted his cheek.

”Didi…you’re my fiance now…I’ve never felt more secure in our relationship ever. Don't you feel it too?”

Yibo thought over Zhan’s words and then nodded. 

”Good…”

”I love it when you call me your fiance,” Yibo grinned.

”I love it too,” Zhan smiled and rested his forehead against Yibo’s. 

”Kiss me some more…before I have to go.” Yibo whispered.

Zhan smiled against his lips before slotting them together. He wrapped his arms around Yibo and pulled him closer. Yibo sighed and melted into the kiss, his hands resting on Zhan’s chest. 

Zhan’s lips caressed Yibo’s, kissing them softly. Yibo sucked on Zhan’s lips and moaned when Zhan’s tongue played with his. Zhan walked him back against the door and his hands roamed all over Yibo’s body as he deepened the kiss. Yibo moaned helpessly as Zhan's hands grabbed at him hungrily and his teeth nibbled on him mercilessly. When they finally pulled apart, breathless, Zhan ran his thumb over Yibo’s wet and red lips. He kissed both his cheeks and his nose.

”I should go now,” Yibo sighed. “I have a flight to catch after the interview.”

”Hmm,” Zhan smiled sadly. “Message me when you reach the airport.”

Yibo’s eyes lit up and he nodded happily.

”I’ll miss you,” Zhan brushed a strand of his hair aside.

Yibo kissed Zhan’s lips once more and then they straightened their clothes. Yibo left the restroom first and found his waiting manager.

”There you are…if you’d arrived any later, I would have barged in there myself!” She rolled her eyes. “You two…” she shook her head. 

Yibo grinned and followed her. A few minutes later, Zhan stepped out of the restroom cautiously and made his way back to the event. As he neared the seating area, he noticed Long Danni sitting with Du Hua. They seemed to be talking amicably and Zhan paused in his tracks and clenched his fist.

When he approached his seat in the row behind them, Long Danni turned to face him and smiled. She stood up and bowed to Du Hua and took her leave.

”Xiao Zhan!” Du Hua beckoned Zhan.

Zhan leaned forward with a genuine smile.

”Congratulations,” she patted his shoulder. “I’m so proud of you.”

”Thanks, Du-Mama,” Zhan smiled sheepishly.

Du Hua leaned in closer and covered her mouth with her hand as she spoke in Zhan’s ear.

”Thank you for doing what we asked tonight,” she whispered.

”No problem, Du-Mama,” Zhen shook his head and then bowed. “I won't question your judgement.”

”That makes one of you,” she chuckled. “Anyway…I think your cp thing should blow over soon…especially after tonight.”

When Zhan leaned back into his seat, he felt a sinking feeling in his heart.

_I know what she said was right. And it would only benefit us if there was less attention on us and our every move. But why do I feel sad that our cp might dwindle and fade away? Why do I take pride in the fact that people love us together?_

Just then, he was called on stage along with Yang Zi to receive his next award. He went on with her and performed the necessary formalities. When they returned off stage Zhan looked at Yibo’s now empty seat. Instead of returning to his own seat, two places down, he sat down as casually and naturally as he could in the seat beside Yibo’s and placed his award on Yibo’s seat and took his phone out.

> _Zhan: Miss you…  
>    
>  Bo-di: Just reached the airport…miss you too  
>    
>  Zhan: I love you  
>    
>  Bo-di: Ge…are you okay?  
>    
>  Zhan: Yeah  
>    
>  Bo-di: No, you’re not  
>    
>  Zhan: I just realized that this is how it’s gonna be now on  
>    
>  Bo-di: What do you mean?  
>    
>  Zhan: No public appearances together, no interviews together  
>    
>  Zhan: Even if we do appear somewhere, who knows if our managements will ever allow us to just be ourselves  
>    
>  Zhan: Hell, who knows if we’ll ever work on a project together again!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Well, the joke’s on them…because they will make it so obvious if they do so  
>    
>  Bo-di: Any other popular cp would be exploited for their popularity and given many chances to appear together and even work with each other  
>    
>  Bo-di: If we star together again, that shit would be a mega success  
>    
>  Bo-di: The fact that they won't do that despite our popularity will make people suspicious at the very least and absolutely sure about our relationship at the most  
>    
>  Bo-di: They’re just fanning the flames more by keeping us so carefully apart  
>    
>  Zhan: I guess you’re right…  
>    
>  Bo-di: But you’re still not feeling better, are you?  
>    
>  Zhan: I just need you…I need a hug  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m right there with you  
>    
>  Zhan: Hmm…  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’ll video you when I land and get to my hotel room  
>    
>  Zhan: Do you have the ring?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Always…it’s around my neck  
>    
>  Zhan: Mine too  
>    
>  Bo-di: Cheer up, ge! I’ll be back in a few days and then you’ll get to come to my racetracks, remember?  
>    
>  Zhan: Oh yeah…totally forgot…but are you sure it’s safe?  
>    
>  Bo-di: We’ll go there late at night, ge…there won’t be anyone except my crew…and they don’t care about all this celebrity crap…that’s why I like hanging out with them so much!  
>    
>  Zhan: Okay, if you say so  
>    
>  Bo-di: Okay, boarding’s starting… gotta go  
>    
>  Bo-di: I love you, ge…I’ll see you in a few days!  
>    
>  Zhan: I love you too _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another Yizhan AU!!!! - [Enchanted](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24466354)
> 
> Flower shop owner Yibo and bakery owner Xiao Zhan have their own love language. The question is will they understand each other or not?
> 
> Warning: Tooth-rotting fluffy fluff.
> 
> * * *
> 
> Jan 11 - Weibo awards - Du Hua, Long Danni, Untamed producer  
> https://twitter.com/yiboism0/status/1216247228559450112  
> https://twitter.com/NiFan31472752/status/1217386602114142209 
> 
> Jan 11 - Weibo - Du Hua and Yibo interaction  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rsHbZDjpAAY
> 
> Jan 11 - Weibo - Du Hua talking to XZ  
> https://twitter.com/YizhanBR/status/1216001067521134592  
> https://twitter.com/ZhanGeBoDi/status/1245429203127996416
> 
> Jan 11 - Weibo - Du Hua talking to XZ and Yibo separately pics -  
> https://www.instagram.com/p/B7aKs6wg2IY/
> 
> Jan 11 - Weibo - Yibo pulled by hand -  
> http://centkent.blogspot.com/2020/01/zhang-yixing-pulls-wang-yibo-by-hand-at.html 
> 
> Weibo awards analysis -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDMEZu-mXss 
> 
> Weibo awards Wang Yibo full cut -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4j_pYwK5Og


	238. Where will this stop?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have organized my Yizhan works into series which you can subscribe to so you get notified every time I add a new Yizhan story -  
> [Yizhan diaries](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1611649)  
> [Yizhan AUs](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1773988)
> 
> I have so many new Yizhan stories coming up, it's not even funny! And [mizmelodrama](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mizmelodrama/pseuds/mizmelodrama) is such an enabler so all of you can thank them for the insane number of fics I am writing! Also, check their fics out if you like SuperM/WayV/NCT and the SM boys!
> 
> I have one last deadline for my semester on Monday and then will post the next new Yizhan story!!! Wish me luck for my deadline!

* * *

”I can't believe it!” Yibo rested his head in Zhan’s lap as they wrapped up for the night.

Zhan sat against the headboard, reading, while Yibo lay in his lap scrolling through Weibo.

”Bjyx has shot to number one on the cp board…and zsww is at number 3!” Yibo exclaimed. “Looks like their ploy at Weibo night backfired,” he chuckled.

”What’s zsww?” Zhan asked casually as his attention remained on his book.

”Apparently bjyx means I am the top and zsww means you’re the top. There’s another one…lsfy…which means we switch,” Yibo sat up and smirked.

”What?!” Zhan’s head jerked up from the book and his eyes widened.

”Yeah…” Yibo shuffled closer and straddled Zhan. “And most people tend to think I am the top!” He wiggled his eyebrows. 

”I can't believe people…people talk about…our….positions,” Zhan stuttered as Yibo wrapped his arms around his neck.

”I can't believe people think you bottom more…” Yibo rubbed their noses together. “But I understand why they would think that…after all, you maintain such a sweet, cute, squeaky clean image in front of the public.”

”And you put up this cool, casually sexy image, what with all your biking and skateboarding…is that what is, then?” Zhan rolled his eyes and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s waist. "Such nonsense..." 

”But really…it’s crazy…” Yibo sat in Zhan’s lap comfortably, “how much speculation is going around about us because of Weibo night. Now people are even more convinced that are together and that we are being forced to maintain a distance!” Yibo giggled. “There was no way our managements would have thought their strategy could backfire…and how!”

”Yeah,” a slow smile spread across Zhan’s face, “our fans aren’t blind. Or at least not easily deterred.” He chuckled.

Zhan’s hand slid up Yibo’s body and cupped the back of his neck. He pulled him in close and enveloped his lips. Yibo pushed down against Zhan, rolling his hips, causing Zhan to gasp softly. He took Zhan’s glasses off without breaking the kiss as Zhan leaned back and slid down onto the bed. 

Zhan’s hands circled Yibo’s ass and grabbed at them, forcing him to move harder against him. He deepened the kiss as Yibo began grinding down on him and his hands tugged Yibo’s t-shirt off hurriedly.

When their lips stuck to each other again, Zhan dove in with his tongue, hands running up and down Yibo’s naked back. They found their way up into Yibo’s hair and Zhan pulled at them, throwing Yibo’s head back. Yibo moaned as Zhan bit his way down his neck and mouthed at his soft pale skin.

Zhan raised himself up and in the blink of an eye, flipped them over. He eyed Yibo hungrily and was about to slide his hand into his shorts when his phone rang. Zhan groaned and stretched away from Yibo to look at it.

”It’s my manager…” he raised an eyebrow. “I wonder what she wants at this time of the night…” he huffed and answered the call.

Yibo clung to him, not letting him sit up while talking.

”Hello…yeah…is everything okay?” Zhan grinned at Yibo and let himself be pulled on top of Yibo again.

”Oh…okay…yeah I saw that too…” Zhan moved his neck away from Yibo who had started licking his skin teasingly.

”But what can we do…we did what you said…and we don't have any other events or public appearances together.” Zhan tried to maintain a steady voice as Yibo rolled his hips up into him, again and again.

”What?!?!” Zhan sat up suddenly, causing Yibo to pull back in astonishment.

”No…that is NOT a good idea…” Zhan looked extremely angry.

Yibo eyed Zhan nervously and sat up as well.

”I am not going to- ” he grit his teeth when he was interrupted.

”Fan service is different…this is not the same!” Zhan exclaimed.

“Where will this stop?” Zhan thundered. “Are you going to get me married to someone else next to hide this?!!” 

Yibo’s eyes widened and he felt his heart race at Zhan’s words that shook him to the core.

”NO!” Zhan got off the bed and paced around the room. “I can't do this.”

”I am not overreacting,” Zhan tempered his tone. “But I am not going to agree to this.”

”This isn't necessary…so what if we are trending…there are several other cps that trend.”

”Whatever,” Zhan rubbed his temple, “my answer is no.”

”I am not being impractical. I can't do this. Period.”

”Why? What do you mean why? Because I am already in a relationship!”

”I don't care if she has already agreed!” Zhan fumed.

”How will this help us? It’s only going to hurt Yibo.” He lowered his voice and looked away. “I thought you were on my side…unlike my previous manager.” 

Yibo bit his lips as he struggled to follow the conversation.

”Well…if Du-mama asks him to do this and he agrees,” Zhan glanced at Yibo for a second before continuing, “…then that’s his decision. I won't do it.”

”I can't pretend to…especially not now.”

”I don't want to talk about this any more. Good night.”

Zhan ended the call and kept standing with his back to Yibo. Yibo could see his shoulders sag and his head hang low. He walked to the edge of the bed on his knees and wrapped his arms around Zhan’s stomach, hugging him from behind.

”Everything okay, ge?”

”Hmm,” Zhan replied after a long exhale.

”What happened?” Yibo turned him around.

”Nothing…it’s not important.”

”That sounded _very_ important,” Yibo pointed to Zhan’s phone.

”You’re not gonna like it…”

”Tell me.”

”They want to start a rumor about me and someone…maybe ‘leak’ some shots of us…as if we were in a secret relationship…to promote- ”

”Let me guess…with Yang Zi?” Yibo flattened his lips.

”I said no…” Zhan cupped the back of Yibo’s head and kissed his forehead.

”Why did you mention Du-mama?” Yibo’s displeased look turned into a frown.

”This may or may not be a joint idea between our managers. And Du-mama may or may not be on board with this. I’m not really sure at this point.”

”I don't think she will…Du-mama won't cross that line.”

”What if she does…what if she asks you to do something like this?” Zhan looked at Yibo nervously.

”She wouldn’t…”

”What if she did?”

Yibo fell silent and thought over the question. He gazed at Zhan, whose face was dropping with every passing second.

”I don't think it would help us in any way so I won't do it.” Yibo smiled and placed his hand on Zhan’s cheek.

”And what if it did help us?” Zhan didn't smile back.

Yibo’s smile faltered but he continued in a soft soothing tone.

”Didn't you only say, ge…we’re more secure in our relationship now? And if we have to do something to protect it, we should? This is just like fan service.”

”But there’s a line. Fan-service is different. This is…”

”None of it matters, ge…it’s all just for the public eye. We know what’s real behind this whole circus show.”

Zhan took a step back, letting Yibo’s hand slide down his face.

”Ge?” Yibo blinked in confusion.

”Where does it stop?”

”What do you mean?”

”Where does this all stop? Even if we do get married…our marriage won't mean anything in China…so when people start asking us why we’re still single and unmarried at 45…what will they do? Make us get married to other women just for appearances?!?” Zhan’s voice rose with every word.

”Ge?!” Yibo’s eyes widened. “You’re taking this to a whole other level…we’re not talking about several years down the line- “

”But eventually we will…eventually _they_ will. What happens ten years later? Twenty years later? Will you do it then? Whatever is necessary just because it will ‘help us’?”

”Ge, I didn't mean that…” Yibo began but paused when he saw the flare in Zhan’s eyes.

”Why are you getting so angry?”

Zhan closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. When he calmed down, he took a step towards Yibo once again and spoke although he couldn't keep the irritation out of his voice.

”When I was flying back from my shoot the other day, I bumped into Ayunga. We switched seats so we could sit together and catch up.”

”I know…you texted me.” Yibo cocked his head to one side and waited.

”Well…when we landed…he walked with me and…”

”And?”

”All my fans were there…and it was crazy as always…and he just was so shocked. Later on he texted me…and he said he can't imagine what it must be like for us…and he said he understood why it’s near impossible for us to be in public together… ”

”Hmm…but I still don't get why you got so mad at this?”

”Don't you see!? Being together, working together, being seen together is easier for them than it is for us…maybe because their cp isn’t number 1. They can still go places together and somehow…it’s okay. Why is it not okay for us?! Why is everything so complicated?!” Zhan’s voice grew louder again.

”Hey…shh…” Yibo pulled Zhan into a hug and held him close. “You’re just getting frustrated right now because of the conversation. I know it’s overwhelming. And if it makes you feel any better…I wouldn't do anything that you weren’t comfortable with. Even if it is something that would help us.”

”Okay,” Zhan sighed and hugged him back. “I’m sorry…I don't know why I got so…I’m just feeling so…”

”I know what you need…” Yibo pulled back and smirked.

”What?” Zhan’s eyes narrowed.

”You need to silence all the chaos in your head. You know how I do it?”

”Biking.”

”Yes! So that’s where we are going now,” Yibo jumped off the bed and pulled Zhan along.

”Now? It’s past midnight!”

”Even better. There won't be anyone at the tracks except my crew.”

”They work this late?!”

”They are on the tracks late every Tuesday and Thursday…come on! It’s been so long since we’ve been together and you still haven't seen this part of my life!”

”You know why, Bo-di.” Zhan stopped him for a second. “Is this safe?”

”I have spare helmets and- “

”You know what I mean.”

”It’s just going to be my crew. We don't need to tell them anything. I can just say I wanted to show my friend around. They won't ask any more questions. And no one’s going to take any photos…don’t worry.”

”Umm…okay…”

”Come on, ge! You’ll love it. You need to see how good your fiance is on the tracks!”

”Fine!” Zhan smiled finally as Yibo threw clothes at him to change into. “Let’s go to your tracks.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayunga and XZ took the same flight once -
> 
> https://twitter.com/rischassie/status/1216998140642983937  
> https://twitter.com/AnnieTabinas/status/1216948900952772613


	239. It's sickening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My next submission for the BJYX prompt fest - [Follow you](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24633400) \- Yibo is being stalked. Xiao Zhan gets angry and protective and suggests Yibo stay with him for a while.
> 
> Let me know what you think!!!!!

* * *

Zhan stood in the stands by the tracks where Yibo had instructed him to. His jaw dropped with every zoom that came and went as Yibo ran laps. His heart stopped every time Yibo leaned in for each turn and corner. He held his breath as Yibo’s knee touched the ground and didn't release it until he was upright again.

Finally, when Yibo came to a halt near the stands, he gestured for Zhan to join him. Zhan jogged towards him and Yibo took him to the room where all the gear was kept along with a lounge for the team to relax among other amenities.

”Take this one, ge…it should fit you,” Yibo handed him a jacket and protective gear.

”Excuse me?” Zhan blinked at Yibo.

”I’m taking you for a ride!” Yibo grinned.

”Umm…no,” Zhan took a step back.

”Come on, ge…it’ll be fun!” Yibo shoved the items into Zhan’s arms. “You’ve been on my bike before!”

”Yibo…it’s different sitting on your bike on a normal road…but this a proper racing track!”

Zhan glanced around at the handful of staff that was present and could see amused grins on some of their faces.

”Trust me, ge,” Yibo lowered his voice and his face softened. “You’ll be fine…I know you’ll enjoy it!”

”Okay…” Zhan muttered, only partially convinced.

* * *

Nothing could have prepared Zhan for what came next. After some initial instructions and trial rounds at slow speeds, Yibo took off like a jet. Although according to Yibo it wasn't the proper racing experience and they were going at a much slower pace than the real deal, it was enough for Zhan.

He clung to Yibo for the whole ride. But with each passing second, thrill replaced the fear. He felt a rush pass through his body that he had never felt before. An exhilaration that made no sense to him. He had never been an adrenaline junkie. But the kick he was getting out of the experience was reckless and exciting.

When Yibo stopped the bike at the far end of the tracks, away from the lounge and crew, Zhan took his helmet off and let out a long exhale. 

”Wow.” Zhan rested his forehead against Yibo’s back. “Just. Wow.”

”I’m assuming you loved it,” Yibo looked at him over his shoulder.

”I don't know what I felt…but it was amazing!” Zhan got off the bike and stood in front of Yibo. “I think I get why you love this so much. It’s more than just the adrenaline…it’s…it’s…” Zhan struggled to find the right words.

But before he could even try to finish his sentence, Yibo grabbed him by the collar and crashed their lips together. He kissed him, rough, haphazard and quick before pulling away and glancing around quickly.

Zhan glanced around as well and then, having not had enough, grabbed Yibo’s hair and pulled him in for another hasty kiss. Yibo gasped as Zhan enveloped all of him, his tongue lewd and desperate. When the kiss ended, Zhan wiped Yibo’s wet and shiny lips.

”How about when we get home…I ride you?” Zhan murmured in a low voice that sent a heat wave down to Yibo’s groin.

”Uhh…fuck yes,” Yibo hurriedly put on his helmet and started the bike.

Zhan got on with a chuckle and held on tight as they returned to the pit. When they were done returning all the gear to the staff and were about to leave, a voice called out to Yibo from afar.

”Otouto?!”

Yibo turned around immediately in the direction of the voice. His face lit up when he saw the man grinning at him.

”Ge!” He exclaimed and walked over to him excitedly.

Zhan watched as Yibo approached the familiar looking man and they hugged affectionately.

”What are you doing here?!” The man smiled widely.

”Just came for some quick laps and to…” Yibo turned to gesture to Zhan to come join them, “…show…uhh…a friend around.”

”Ah…Xiao Zhan,” the man side-stepped Yibo and met Zhan halfway. “Nice to finally meet you in person,” he bowed and extended his hand out.

Zhan shook his hand bowed politely with a small smile on his face.

”Zhan-ge, this is Yin Zheng-ge,” Yibo beamed.

”Nice to meet you too,” Zhan nodded.

”So are you a biker too?” Yin Zheng asked.

Zhan broke into laughter as Yibo curled his lips inwards.

”Oh god no!” Zhan shook his head. “I can't even ride a bicycle!”

”Oh then were you just watching Yibo?” 

”Yeah but I also gave him a ride around!” Yibo chirped.

”You?” Yin Zheng raised an eyebrow. “Gave another man a ride on your bike?!”

”Yeah…” Yibo shrugged.

”What happened to a ‘man should ride his own bike’?”

”I never said that!” Yibo exclaimed, suddenly nervous.

”I had to convince you so much to ride together on a scooter!”

”I just…I just…really wanted Zhan-ge to know what it feels like!”

Yin Zheng eyed him in amusement.

”Alright,” Yibo cleared his throat. “We should get going…we have…I have an early morning tomorrow.”

”How about we grab a quick beer from the fridge and relax in the lounge for a bit? I haven't seen you in ages!”

Yibo glanced at Zhan as if seeking permission and Yin Zheng smiled inwardly at the moment. He suppressed a chuckle and turned to address Zhan.

”Looks like it’s your decision. What say, Xiao Zhan?”

”No, no!” Zhan flushed a deep red. “Of course…I don't mind. I can just head home…I mean go back myself! You two should catch up. ” 

”No, stay with us. I would love to hang out with you as well.” Yin Zheng smiled kindly.

”Umm…sure,” Zhan bit his lips and glanced at Yibo.

”Come on then, let’s get some beer.” Yin Zheng led the way to the lounge.

* * *

They sat around the comfortable private lounge, beers in hand. Zhan sat quietly for the most part as Yibo and Yin Zheng caught up. He observed how happy and light Yibo was around Yin Zheng and he felt warm with affection at how at ease Yin Zheng put Yibo.

When Zhan was nearly done with his beer, Yibo and Yin Zheng were already on their second. Unlike them, however, Zhan could already feel the tipsiness creeping up on him. He knew he had probably turned red, especially on his cheeks and ears. He didn't miss the occasional glances Yibo threw his way to keep checking in on him and the way those smiles grew softer as he probably noticed Zhan’s flush. 

_God, I must look so stupid. Grown man looking like a little child who can't hold more than half a beer!_ Zhan grumbled inwardly.

”So what about you, Xiao Zhan?” Yin Zheng’s voice broke his thoughts. 

”Huh?” Zhan looked up again, embarrassed at having zoned out of the conversation.

”Are you okay, ge?” Yibo asked, unable to keep the fondness out of his voice.

”Yeah,” Zhan grinned. “Sorry…was just thinking about…work.”

Yin Zheng and Yibo chuckled and Yin Zheng, on noticing his empty beer bottle, opened another one for Zhan.

”You need to relax,” Yin Zheng clinked their bottles together. “I’ve seen the craziness around you…both of you…you worked your ass off in 2019!” 

”Thank you…it was…a crazy year,” Zhan nodded as he took a sip.

”It’s nice that you two have remained…friends,” Yin Zheng eyed them as he took another sip.

Zhan and Yibo glanced at each other and stayed silent for a few seconds, until Yibo spoke first.

”You know me,” Yibo smiled, “if I find someone in this industry worth my time…I keep them close.”

Zhan rolled his eyes but couldn't help the giggle, which he blamed on his happy high, that escaped his lips.

”I’ve seen the madness around your cp…” Yin Zheng smirked, “I’ve always wanted to ask if there’s any truth to it.”

Yibo took in Yin Zheng’s expression for some time before making a decision.

”Yeah…” Yibo replied casually and took another swig of his beer.

”Yeah? That’s all?” Yin Zheng raised his eyebrows.

Yibo grinned and shrugged.

”Xiao Zhan?” Yin Zheng tried his luck with him instead. “So?”

”Uhh…we…” Zhan couldn't help but flush harder and look at Yibo for help.

”Yeah, alright, ge!!” Yibo groaned finally. “We are together.”

”I knew it!” Yin Zheng pumped his fist in the air. “This is awesome.

”Wow…you’re really excited.”

”I am a shipper of bjyx.” Yin Zheng winked.

”But are you bjyx or zsww?” Yibo winked back.

”Yibo!!!” Zhan exclaimed in horror. ”Can you two not talk about this,” He downed his second beer. 

”How about you go easy?” Yibo walked over and sat beside Zhan, taking his empty beer bottle for him.

”Ugh,” Yin Zheng snorted and downed his beer as well. “You guys are so cute together. It’s sickening,” he rolled his eyes.

Yibo smirked as he opened the bottle of water for Zhan and handed it to him. When Zhan took a sip, he noticed the fondness with which Yibo was looking at him. He began giggling and for some reason couldn't stop once he had started. He fell back against the couch, unable to reign in the fit.

"Are you okay, ge?" Yibo asked him, a little incredulously.

"Hmm," Zhan managed to nod before choking on his own laughter.

"Looks like someone's a light weight," Yin Zheng chuckled.

"That is accurate," Yibo chuckled along and shook his head as Zhan continued to devolve into a puddle of giggles.

"I guess you should take him home then," Yin Zheng stood up and extended his hand out to Yibo. "Catch you on the tracks next time?"

"Yep," Yibo nodded and bumped fists with Yin Zheng, "and ge...sorry I didn't tell you sooner...we...it's just..."

"I know how it is," Yin Zheng sighed. "But I'm happy for you, otouto! Are you both happy?"

"Very happy!" Zhan exclaimed all of a sudden and threw his arms around Yibo, pulling him into a clumsy embrace.

Yibo laughed fondly as Zhan clung to him and somehow managed to stand him up without peeling him off himself.

"Okay!" Yibo announced. "It's time for us to go home, ge," he huffed as he adjusted Zhan in his arms. 

"I'll see you two around," Yin Zheng nodded and headed to his bike to take to the tracks.

Yibo looked at the giggling mess in his arms and rolled his eyes, unable to control his own smile.

"What am I going to do with you, Zhan-ge?" He brushed Zhan's hair away from his eyes and walked out the exit.

"Everything!" Zhan grinned from ear to ear and planted a kiss on Yibo's cheeks as soon as he had been deposited in the passenger seat. "You are going to do everything with me!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My next submission for the BJYX prompt fest - [Follow you](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24633400) \- Yibo is being stalked. Xiao Zhan gets angry and protective and suggests Yibo stay with him for a while. Let me know what you think!!
> 
> * * *
> 
> I had to bring Yin Zheng-ge into the story at some point especially after he outed himself as a fanfic and shipping fan!! hahaha! To those who don't know of him ---
> 
> Yibo and Yin Zheng friendship -
> 
> https://twitter.com/sumoeri/status/1241047041016397824  
> https://twitter.com/Angela_Tiwi/status/1160789722966265856  
> https://twitter.com/WYiboW/status/1258424939339583488  
> https://twitter.com/uniq5s/status/1159808157641609216
> 
> Yin Zheng interview where he talks about fanfiction, shipping, and if he ever asked his close friends if a ship/rumor about them is true (he gave a smirk and said he won't say but we know who he thought about!) -
> 
> https://twitter.com/bonbonruru/status/1251014248425312256?s=19


	240. You're not helping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My next submission for the BJYX prompt fest - [Follow you](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24633400) \- Yibo is being stalked. Xiao Zhan gets angry and protective and suggests Yibo stay with him for a while.
> 
> Let me know what you think!!!!!

* * *

When Yibo pulled the car up their driveway and turned to look at Zhan, he had dozed off in the passenger seat. He smiled and reached his hand out to touch his cheek. Barely had his fingers grazed Zhan’s skin, that he stirred awake and opened his eyes sleepily.

”Hey,” Yibo unbuckled Zhan’s seat belt, “let’s get you in bed…”

”Mmm,” Zhan hummed and smiled. “No.”

”What?” Yibo paused, surprised at the response.

Zhan bit his lip and stared at Yibo. Then, with a laugh, he launched himself towards Yibo and crashed their lips together. Yibo gasped in astonishment and froze at the unexpected attack. Zhan crawled forward as he sucked on Yibo’s lips, his hands clutching Yibo’s shirt.

”Zhan-ge…” Yibo stuttered. “What are you-”

”You’re so tasty!” Zhan giggled into Yibo’s mouth as he crossed over and got onto his lap.

Yibo grinned and reached for the handle to pull his seat all the way back. He wrapped his arms around Zhan to steady the man and adjust him on his lap..

”Zhan-ge,” Yibo chuckled fondly as Zhan kept kissing him sloppily.

”Mine…” Zhan murmured as he trailed kisses all over Yibo’s face and neck.

”Yours,” Yibo smiled and let Zhan cling to him as he nipped and sucked.

Zhan cupped Yibo’s neck and turned his attention back to his lips. His giggles stopped as he enveloped Yibo’s lips thoroughly and kissed him fervently. 

”All mine,” Zhan muttered as he mouthed at Yibo desperately.

”All yours,” Yibo whispered back.

Zhan paused and sat back, looking at Yibo intently, breaths still shallow. Yibo ran a finger down his face slowly and watched as Zhan shuddered under his touch. Zhan stayed in Yibo’s lap and gazed at him. As Yibo’s finger made its way down Zhan’s cheek, Zhan turned his face to the side and caught it mid-trail with his mouth.

Yibo’s breath hitched as he felt a sudden warm wetness around his finger. His eyes darkened as Zhan took the finger in his mouth and sucked on it at an excruciatingly slow pace, eyes fixed on Yibo. Yibo felt heat pool around his growing erection as Zhan opened his mouth wide and took in another finger in his mouth.

”Fuck…Zhan-ge…” Yibo breathed as Zhan continued sucking on both digits, tongue sliding up and down the long fingers. 

Zhan batted his eyelashes as he kept up the lewd motion. When he saw Yibo shake, Zhan closed his eyes and let out a long deep moan as he began moving on top of Yibo’s erection. 

”Fuck…” Yibo swallowed and shut his eyes as Zhan kept grinding on him. 

Yibo’s other hand dug into Zhan’s hip as he rubbed against him.

”Promise me,” Zhan panted as he sunk his teeth into Yibo’s chest.

”Aahh,” Yibo groaned, “promise what?”

”Promise me you will never agree to a fake relationship.”

Yibo’s eyes opened wide and he pushed Zhan back so he could get a better look at him.

”Is that still on your mind?!”

”Promise me…” Zhan met Yibo’s gaze and pouted.

”I promise, sweetheart,” Yibo looked at him worriedly and tucked a strand of hair away from his eyes.

”Good,” Zhan’s lips trembled. “Good.”

”Hey,” Yibo held Zhan’s face up towards him by the chin. “Are you…crying?”

”I…no…I’m just…” Zhan fumbled as he felt his eyes burn, “I’m just angry at that call…and at the thought of you pretending to…” Zhan rambled on, “and that we still have to…but we can't…” 

”Shh…shh…” Yibo stifled his chuckle and wiped Zhan’s now damp cheeks. “You’re drunk…”

”No…you’re drunk!” Zhan poked his tongue out.

Yibo laughed softly and shook his head.

”Come on,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s nose. “Let’s get you inside…”

”Nooooo,” Zhan whined and wrapped himself around Yibo like a koala bear.

”What no? You don't want to go in?” Yibo massaged Zhan’s back indulgently.

”Zhan-Zhan doesn’t want to go in,” Zhan giggled once more.

Yibo, though taken aback at the sudden childishness in Zhan’s voice, felt a warmth spread across his chest. He smiled as Zhan nuzzled closer and clung to him. Then, with a determined look, he wrapped his arms around Zhan and unlocked the car door.

”Well… _Zhan-Zhan_ …” Yibo steadied his arms under Zhan before sitting up straight. “You are going in whether you want to or not…it’s almost three in the morning.”

Zhan feigned a whine but giggled again when Yibo stepped out of the car with him still in his arms. Yibo struggled with the weight at first but then, readjusted Zhan in his arms with a huff, and began walking, slowly and carefully. Zhan kept his legs wrapped around Yibo tightly and sighed happily.

When they got to the front door, however, Yibo was not able to hold onto Zhan and unlock the door at the same time. Zhan slid off him and stood between Yibo and the door. He played with Yibo’s hair as Yibo struggled to get the key inside the lock.

”You’re not helping, _Zhan-Zhan_ ,” Yibo groaned as Zhan licked his ear.

”Mmm,” Zhan purred and nibbled on Yibo’s now red ear.

”Seriously, ge…” Yibo gulped as Zhan licked his way down his neck. “Give me one second…I just need to…”

Zhan pulled back with a huff and Yibo finally got the key in.

”Now…” Zhan raised an eyebrow and hooked a finger on the waistband of Yibo’s pants. “Zhan-Zhan wants…” he slid his hand inside and cupped Yibo.

”Yeah?” Yibo smirked and tugged his jacket off and then pulled Zhan’s hoodie off.

”Mmm,” Zhan nodded and licked his lips.

Yibo pulled Zhan close and sealed their lips together. Zhan clawed into Yibo's back and deepened the kiss almost immediately. They entered the house tangled up in each other, lips wet, breaths shallow. For the next several minutes, Zhan and Yibo covered the distance between the front door and the bedroom in bursts and sprints, interrupted with heavy kisses and heavier grinding against any surface they could find. 

Yibo pinned Zhan against the wall halfway up the stairs and devoured his lips greedily. By the time they reached the top, their shirts were off and their pants were undone. By the time they reached the room, the pants were forgotten somewhere along the corridor and their naked bodies were pressed hard against each other.

”Grab the lube…” Zhan managed to mutter in between hungry kisses. 

Yibo nodded breathlessly and did as he was told. He spread a generous amount on his finger and was about to enter Zhan when he was stopped. Zhan shook his head with a mischievous grin and pulled out of Yibo's embrace. He turned around and began walking out the door. Yibo watched in confusion as Zhan left the room but not without turning around one last time to gesture for Yibo to follow him.

”Come on,” Zhan spoke in a deep, sultry voice.

"Uhh...where?" Yibo's eyes stared at Zhan's toned ass, alluring and inviting yet so far away. 

"We didn't buy this giant estate in an uber private and secure neighborhood for nothing..."

"Huh?" Yibo blinked.

"You’re fucking me outside.”


	241. I forgot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the last week or two have been a little tricky for me, mental health wise, and it has definitely had an impact on my ability to write! It sucks that it's getting in the way of me doing something I love to do but all the comments have helped me! So a big thank you to all you readers! And a big shoutout to mizmelodrama for literally staying by my side as I trudged and pushed my way through my mental block. 
> 
> The second chapter for my other fic - [Follow you](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24633400) \- is out as well! Let me know what you think!!

* * *

Zhan shivered as the cool night breeze caressed his damp skin. He whimpered again as Yibo’s long fingers searched deep inside him.

”Yibo…” Zhan sighed helplessly. “More…more…”

Yibo sucked harder on Zhan’s nipple as he drove his fingers further into him.

”Aahh…fuck…yeah…” Zhan bit down on his lip and hissed.

They lay atop each other in the bare night on their porch. Zhan was sprawled across the sofa, writhing under Yibo who was attacking him with his fingers and lips and teeth.

”Zhan-ge…” Yibo rasped as he kissed his way down Zhan’s neck, “you look so fucking beautiful like this…”

Yibo ran his eyes down Zhan’s long naked body that glowed under the moonlight. He marvelled at the sight and felt his entire body surge with the heat at the thought that he was all his to take. 

”Quit staring at me and fuck me already, Wang Yibo!” Zhan groaned and clawed at Yibo in an attempt to get his hand, which had stilled, moving again.

Yibo laughed and leaned forward to plant a kiss on Zhan’s pouting lips. 

”So impatient, gege,” Yibo grinned as he hooked his fingers inside Zhan, pushing into Zhan’s weak spot again.

”Aah,” Zhan threw his head back, “now replace those fingers with something better…” he bit his lips as Yibo fingered into him once more.

Yibo smirked and pulled his fingers out. The next moment, before Zhan could whine, he was filled almost immediately by an equally impatient Yibo.

”So bossy and demanding when you drink,” Yibo murmured against Zhan’s skin as he bottomed out.

”You like it,” Zhan breathed heavily as Yibo began moving.

”I love it.” Yibo sunk his teeth into Zhan’s skin and thrust into him repeatedly.

Zhan hissed as Yibo rammed into him harder and deeper. His eyes raked over the scenery all around them as he fell deep into the throes of pleasure. Yibo pounded into him in the dead silence of the night, as their voices rang throughout the open space of their garden.

”And I love you,” Yibo grunted as he kept thrusting.

”Stop…sit back…” Zhan breathed heavily as he kissed Yibo back until he was seated against the patio sofa.

”Huh?” Yibo muttered in confusion even as Zhan rearranged them abruptly.

”I wanna ride you…” Zhan straddled him.

Yibo grinned and watched as Zhan lined up with his erection and began lowering himself on it. Zhan held Yibo’s gaze as he slowly took him in. Yibo’s mouth went dry as he watched Zhan bite down on his lower lip and moaned softly with every inch that he engulfed.

Zhan clutched the back of the couch and hovered over Yibo’s lips as he bottomed out and began bouncing. Yibo’s hands clenched down harder on Zhan’s hips as he moved faster, pushing Yibo deeper into him each time. Yibo threw his head back and Zhan jumped at his neck, sucking on it harshly as he edged them on.

”I should get you drunk more often,” Yibo smirked and groaned as Zhan kept mouthing at his body as he rode him. 

”I should watch you ride your bike more often,” Zhan sighed back as Yibo thrust up to meet him halfway.

”Maybe you should…” Yibo grabbed Zhan by the hair and crashed their lips together as he began thrusting up into him harder and rougher.

”Aahh…” Zhan moaned into Yibo’s mouth and began riding him at a feverish pace. 

Yibo gripped Zhan’s erection that was leaking copiously and began stroking it fervently to match the pace at which Zhan was moving. Zhan’s moans grew louder as he shivered in Yibo’s hand. Zhan bounced frantically and soon Yibo was reduced to relentless moans as well. They moved together in perfect sync, bodies heated and sweaty, mouths wet and hungry. 

”Fuck, ge…” Yibo grunted as Zhan inched him towards his climax, digging his fingers into his hips. 

”Yibo…” Zhan moaned over and over again as he chased their pleasure.

After one particularly rough stroke of Yibo’s hand accompanied by a deep thrust, Zhan found himself falling over the edge. His loud groan spread through the dark garden as he came in furious spurts all over Yibo’s stomach. He kept riding Yibo through his orgasm and clenched around him, sending Yibo rushing over the edge soon as well.

Yibo came with a powerless groan and clung to Zhan tighter as he filled him up. Zhan shuddered as his orgasm prolonged at the sensation of Yibo coming inside him. He moaned softly against Yibo’s shoulder as he slowly came off his high and fell limp. Yibo fell back on the couch and Zhan followed. They stayed wrapped up in each other’s arms for several seconds.

”Zhan-ge…” Yibo spoke finally and let out a long exhale. 

”Hmm,” Zhan hummed as he sat back up, tired and spent.

Yibo enveloped Zhan’s lips in his and pulled him closer. He kissed him tenderly and Zhan smiled into the kiss. 

”I love you,” Yibo whispered and brushed aside some hair from Zhan’s damp forehead. 

”I love you too,” Zhan smiled, his eyes crinkling into half moons. 

”I love you more,” Yibo added softly and caressed Zhan’s cheek.

Zhan gazed into Yibo’s eyes lovingly as his mind cradled Yibo’s words.

”Not possible, Bo-di,” Zhan laughed gently and rubbed their noses together. “Not possible.”

* * *

Zhan stirred at the sound of the doorbell ringing the next morning. He flinched at the sudden noise and turned onto his other side with a grumble. He felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around him and pull him closer. Zhan groaned when the doorbell rang again and hid his face in the crook of Yibo’s shoulder.

”Who the hell is disturbing us this early in the morning!?” Zhan grunted.

Just then, Yibo’s phone began ringing. Zhan finally opened his eyes and glared at the now fully awake boy.

”Sorry…” Yibo scrambled to answer the call. “I…I’ll get it now…”

Zhan threw the pillow over his head and buried his face in the bed.

”Hello? Who is…jiejie!?” Yibo sat up all of a sudden. “Hi…hi…umm…oh shit…yeah I…I forgot…” he scurried out of bed and began pulling on his pyjamas with one hand. “I’m coming…sorry jiejie…”

Yibo ended the call hurriedly and yanked on a t-shirt.

”Ge!” Yibo jumped back onto the bed and shook Zhan awake. “You have to wake up…it’s jiejie…my jiejie is here…!!”

”Wha…what?” Zhan sat up confused and bewildered. “Who?!”

”Mei-jie…my cousin from Guangzhou…I totally forgot she was supposed to be visiting us!”

”Yibo!!” Zhan’s eyes widened and he snapped awake immediately. “How could you forget?! The house is a mess and I haven't even prepared the guest room for her!”

”It’s okay, ge,” Yibo kissed his cheek quickly and got out of bed. “She’s cool…and it’s just gonna be her…she’s only in town for two days. She has some work related things here. She’ll barely be around!”

”Fine…we shouldn’t leave her waiting at the door! Let’s go!” Zhan rolled his eyes and Yibo followed him as they ran downstairs.

”Just a second, jiejie!” Yibo yelled out as they approached the door.

Zhan stopped in front of the door and hastily brushed down his hair and smoothened his night clothes.

”Don't worry, ge…she’s super sweet and she’s been dying to meet you,” Yibo planted a quick peck on Zhan’s lips and smiled. “It’ll be fun…just us three hanging out!”

With another kiss, Yibo turned around and opened the door.

”Hi jiejie!!” Yibo announced with a broad smile that froze on his face as soon as the door was fully open. 

Zhan and Yibo blinked at the sight in front of them and then at each other and then back at the woman that was currently standing in front of them with two bags at her feet and a baby in her arms.

”Hello, Bo-bo!” Wang Mei smiled. “Nice to finally meet you, Xiao Zhan!”

”He…hello,” Zhan managed a smile and bowed.

”Oh yeah,” Yibo finally muttered in realization, “I forgot…she was going to bring her new baby.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yibo has a sister who he visited in Guangzhou in 2015. I couldn't find any more information on her so am not sure if she is his sibling or cousin. I am going to treat her as a very close first cousin for the sake of my story.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLeoweCYP3c  
> http://weibointl.api.weibo.com/share/151896084.html?weibo_id=3880395785314937


	242. Well what do you know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted the third chapter for my other fic - [Follow you](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24633400) \- yesterday. Go check it out!
> 
> But posting a new chapter here feels like homecoming. Thank you to everyone who leaves such thoughtful, encouraging, and warm comments here and on my twitter. And thank you for being so patient. I am doing better and making progress everyday, slowly but surely. It's been good and bad but I am pushing through. It feels good to be able to write again and share my work again and interact with you all again. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

* * *

“You forgot that your cousin was going to visit us with her infant baby??” Zhan gaped at Yibo and then back at his cousin who just sighed and rolled her eyes.

”I knew I should have reminded you,” she shook her head and adjusted the baby in her arms. “It’s just been so crazy, preparing for this trip and my client meetings, and my nanny dropped out in the last minute, and…”

”Oh no!” Zhan exclaimed as he suddenly sprung into action. “I’m so sorry to keep you standing here!” He bent down and grabbed her bags. “Please…please…come in…Yibo!” He nudged the blinking boy with his elbow. “Let’s go inside and welcome your sister into our home!” He emphasized the words, finally jolting Yibo awake and into action as well.

”Oh…yeah! Sorry, jie!” Yibo placed his hand around his cousin’s shoulder and led her in. They followed Zhan upstairs as he led them to one of the guest rooms that had thus far been unused. But thankfully, due to Zhan’s insistence on doing up every room of the house before completely moving in, the room was in a livable condition.

”I’m so sorry,” Zhan placed the bags beside the bed and scuttled around the room, checking for dust and clutter, “I will have this room completely clean and ready within the hour…”

”It’s perfectly fine, A-Zhan…and you can call me jie as well,” she cradled the baby and giggled. “This room is going to turn into a mess pretty soon with this little one here and all her things!”

”Are you sure? We don't have anything ready…do you need any more- ”

”I’m sure we have everything we need…” she laughed and gestured to Zhan to come join her and Yibo on the bed.

”Oh…okay,” Zhan shuffled closer hesitantly. “I can prepare breakfast for you soon if you’re hungry?”

”Sure…but first…come, sit…I want to see you both…I haven't seen Bo-bo in so long!” She placed her hand on Yibo’s cheek, who up until then was just watching Zhan flutter about in confusion and nervousness. 

”Sorry, I forgot jiejie,” Yibo bit his lips sheepishly. 

”It’s okay…I know how crazy your schedule is. But I have some bad news. It looks like you’ll need to watch the baby while I’m gone for my meetings during the day for today and tomorrow. Or I'll have to…cancel the meetings…” 

She pursed her lips and looked at them both one at a time. Her eyes hovered over them as they looked at her and then at each other and back at her. Their eyes travelled from her beseeching face to the baby that was still sleeping in her arms. 

”I am free today, jie and I’ll figure something out for tomorrow too,” Yibo reassured her. “But I…can’t watch her alone…”

They both turned to Zhan who bit his lips and immediately pulled his phone out to check his calendar.

”How old is she?” Yibo shuffled closer to his cousin on the bed and stared at the baby, curious and intrigued.

”She turned one a few weeks back,” she smiled at the baby.

”What’s her name?” Zhan leaned forward to get a better look.

”A-Lin,” she looked up at Zhan and beamed.

”A-Lin,” Zhan whispered and watched, mesmerized, as the baby seemed to stir at his voice.

He reached his hand out and gently caressed her cheek with a feather light touch. The child opened her eyes slowly and before Zhan knew what was happening, five tiny fingers wrapped themselves around his index finger. The girl looked at Zhan and broke into a brilliant smile and hummed.

”Well what do you know…” Yibo’s cousin whispered, “you’re a Xiao Zhan fan too, huh?” 

”Who isn’t?” Yibo chuckled at him as Zhan’s eyes crinkled into half moons as he smiled radiantly at the baby girl. 

He watched in delight as the child played with Zhan’s finger and made joyful sounds each time Zhan wiggled her hand and cooed at her.

”I’m sorry to ask this of you two,” she sighed as she watched them play, “but, Zhan-Zhan, is there any way you can- ”

”Of course, Mei-jie,” Zhan spoke softly as he gazed at the child and then at Yibo who was looking at him expectantly. “We’ll rearrange things to fit your schedule. We’ll make time. After all, I promised someone that things would be different starting this year,” he winked at Yibo.

Yibo’s eyes lit up and he smiled brightly back at Zhan.

”That’s great! Don't worry, jie!” Yibo chimed in. “Zhan-ge is amazing with children and he said he’ll make time.”

Zhan smiled and shook his head at the enthused boy and then stood up straight. 

”Alright, let’s go over all the instructions while we have breakfast,” Zhan announced. “This is going to be an interesting day,” he chuckled.

* * *

”Okay…I think that’s all of it,” Yibo’s cousin huffed as she finished rattling off to Yibo and Zhan. “She’s an easy child to handle. And I’m only one call away if anything happens!”

”Sounds fine to me,” Yibo threw her a thumbs up and then proceeded to gather all the plates when they were done eating.

By the end of the hour, his cousin was standing at the front door once more, adjusting her laptop bag and files hurriedly.

”My driver is at your disposal for the day, jie,” Yibo smiled at her reassuringly. “Don’t worry, A-Lin is in safe hands! Zhan-ge is with her even though she is still sleeping right now. We’ll be fine!”

”Yeah, I’m not worried…” Yibo’s cousin smiled and patted his cheek. “Zhan-Zhan seems to be completely at ease with her.”

”Yeah…kids love him…everyone loves him,” Yibo chuckled.

”Wow…never thought I’d see my dear Bo-bo so smitten!” 

”Jie!” Yibo cackled and pushed her hand away. “Aren’t you getting late?”

”Alright, I’ll see you later tonight,” she sighed and nodded.

Yibo shut the door when she had taken off in his car and headed back to the guest room where Zhan was keeping the sleeping baby company. He strolled down the hallway and noticed humming in the bedroom as he entered it. 

Zhan was arranging and folding all of the baby’s items neatly in the room when Yibo entered. Yibo glanced at the baby who was asleep on the bed surrounded on all sides by pillows and cushions. He walked up behind Zhan and wrapped his arms around him slowly, making Zhan pause his folding.

”Thanks,” Yibo whispered.

”For what?” Zhan tilted his head sideways to look at Yibo.

”For making the time…”

”I promised you I’ll balance my schedule better starting this year, didn't I?” Zhan smiled and turned around, wrapping his arms around Yibo in return.

”It’ll be a nice relaxing day," Yibo beamed at Zhan. "Just us at home with this angel- ” 

”Yibo,” Zhan raised an eyebrow, “you really think this is going to be an easy task?!”

”It’s going to be fun! Doing this…with you,” Yibo kissed Zhan’s nose and replied.

”I didn't know you liked kids so much!” Zhan narrowed his eyes at Yibo. 

”They’re cute…and you’re cuter with them,” Yibo grinned.

”Shut up,” Zhan rolled his eyes.

Yibo grinned wider and leaned in. He pulled Zhan closer and placed a kiss on the mole at the corner of Zhan’s mouth. Just then, a soft sound interrupted them. Yibo and Zhan turned towards the direction of the sound.

”Looks like your angel is awake,” Zhan chuckled. “Come on, let’s see how _fun_ this is going to be.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update (July 25) -  
> I have NOT abandoned this fic!! Haha!! Like I mentioned in my notes before, I WILL resume posting here soon!! 😊😊😊❤️❤️❤️💚💚💚


	243. Something different

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO EVERYONE! So much to say!! So many reasons to return to posting YTTY!!
> 
> 1\. XZ APPEARED AND I WAS ABLE TO WATCH HIM LIVE AND SCREENSHOT HIM IM BLESSED AND DEAD  
> 2\. ONE OF MY DEAR READERS GAVE ME SOME REALLY GOOD NEWS REGARDING THEIR HEALTH AND IT MADE ME SO HAPPY  
> 3\. I CROSSED 500 FOLLOWERS ON TWITTER, WHAT?!  
> 4\. I MISSED IT  
> 5\. I MISSED IT A LOT!!!
> 
> Thanks for being patient as always! i've been doing okay, up and down, but trying my best to keep a balance and doing my best, whatever that may look like each day. Like I mentioned on twitter and at the end of the last chapter, although it's been a while since i updated ytty, i have NOT and will NOT abandon this fic!

* * *

Yibo followed Zhan as he walked towards the bed. A-Lin was slowly stirring awake but her face still held the peace of slumber. 

_She looks so cute!_ Yibo’s mind gushed. _And Zhan-ge looks even cuter when he looks at her and smiles._

He watched as Zhan leaned forward to check on the wriggling baby and was mesmerized by the way in which Zhan’s entire attention was focussed on the child. 

_There’s something different in his expression._ Yibo pondered. _He looks so-_

But before Yibo could finish the thought, a loud, shrill sound pierced through his brain and forced him to snap his eyes away from the gorgeous face. It was A-Lin. And she was no longer looking or sounding peaceful. Yibo’s eyes widened as he saw her entire tiny face scrunch into a wrinkly red crouton as her voice rose higher and higher with every passing second.

“Well?” Zhan nudged his shoulder. “Go on…”

“Huh?” Yibo whipped his head around to look at Zhan in disbelief. “Me? Go? Where? What?”

“She’s an angel, right? Your angel is beckoning now, Yibo!” Zhan smirked even as he cringed as A-Lin let out another long wail.

Before Yibo could even begin to think of what he was supposed to do, Zhan rolled his eyes with a grin and crawled onto the bed.

“Ayaa…there there,” he cooed as he scooped up the child and cradled her in his arms. “I know…” he soothed her softly, “I know…it’s okay…gege’s here.”

If not for his sheer mortification at the painfully loud and heartbreaking wails of the baby, Yibo would have melted at the sight and sound of Zhan pacifying the girl. But currently, his heart was racing at a hundred miles per hour and he was torn between running away and joining her and crying in one corner. 

”Yibo! Don’t just stand and stare! Help me,” Zhan muttered under his breath. “Aww…it’s okay, A-Lin,” he kept rocking her and murmuring with a smiling face.

Yibo snapped out of his initial shock and walked closer to them. Zhan was now standing by the bed and A-Lin had begun to quieten down. She was watching Zhan carefully but slowly a smile began emerging on her flushed face.

”That’s a good girl!” Zhan gushed and encouraged her. “Such a good girl!”

Yibo watched, now much calmer himself, as A-Lin began grinning as if responding to Zhan’s words. 

“A-Lin is a good girl!” Zhan smiled brightly and poked the girl’s cheeks. “A-Lin will listen to gege!”

A giggle erupted from A-Lin as she began jumping in enthusiasm in Zhan’s arms. Yibo was just about to smile at the playful sight when his eyes widened in alarm as A-Lin seemed to leap out of Zhan’s arms and it almost seemed as if she would fall. But Zhan had been prepared and with a huff, held onto her and readjusted her in his arms.

“Oh, you’re a feisty one, aren’t you?!” Zhan grunted as A-Lin grabbed at his shoulders in an attempt to climb on top of them. “Just like your Jiù-jiu.”

 _Jiù-jiu._ Yibo’s mind repeated the word several times to test it out. _Uncle. Sounds strange._

Somehow, despite being around several Yuehua trainees who addressed him as _laoshi_ or _Yibo-ge_ , this new title sounded different now. 

“Aaayyyybbrrrrrr,” the girl sputtered and pointed at Yibo.

“Yes, that’s your Bo jiù-jiu,” Zhan encouraged her and grinned at Yibo. “Come on,” he beckoned to Yibo, “come play with her. Or did you get scared with just one scream?” Zhan teased.

Yibo cleared his throat and gave Zhan an unimpressed look. He stood by his side and poked A-Lin’s finger with his own. Much to his surprise, she latched on to his finger with her entire hand and shrieked, delighted at herself. 

Seeing the twinkle in her eyes, the radiant smile on her face, and her unbelievably tiny fingers wrapped around his fingertip, Yibo finally felt himself easing and relaxing again. He smiled and chuckled as she tried to bring his finger to her mouth, resisting just enough to avoid being drooled and chewed on. 

“Ahh,” Zhan tapped her hand, “no…no A-Lin…you can’t eat your uncle's finger,” he turned his attention to Yibo. “She must be hungry. Let’s go downstairs. Mei-jie left her entire feeding schedule on the fridge.”

Yibo nodded and followed them down, walking half a step behind Zhan as A-Lin draped herself over Zhan’s shoulder and looked back at Yibo with grabby hands. 

_This will be okay. Probably not as easy as I thought it would be but Zhan-ge seems to know what he’s doing. All I need to do is enjoy their cuteness!_

Ten minutes later, Yibo was eating his own words as he sat in front of A-Lin, who was seated on Zhan’s lap, with a bowl of mashed food in his hands that had less food inside it, but only because most of it was either all over A-Lin or all over him. The entire time, Zhan had not even attempted to keep his giggles in.

Yibo had huffed and grunted as he kept trying to feed the girl, only to have the food either slide down her face, spit out on her clothes, or thrown back at him, followed by delightful giggles by both the child and the man holding her. Yibo glared at Zhan who immediately schooled his expression and finally intervened.

“Aya, A-Lin…come on now…” Zhan held her in place, “stop playing…it’s time to eat properly!”

Yibo narrowed his eyes on them and then tentatively reached out again with a spoonful of food. 

“Aaaa…come on…say aaaa,” Zhan kept talking to her as Yibo tried tempting her with the spoon by making all kinds of absurd sounds - sometimes a plane, sometimes a train, sometimes a bird, sometimes a cat.

Finally, after several more minutes of playing, struggling, and almost begging, A-Lin took her first real bite of the food that was ingested and not spat out. Almost in sync, both Zhan and Yibo cheered out loud and high fived each other and gushed and cooed at the child who broke into giggles and claps herself, mimicking the two overly-satisfied men.

By the time they managed to get enough food in her and clean after the whole mess, an hour had passed and their own stomachs were grumbling. 

“Why don’t you eat first?” Zhan offered as he paced the kitchen with A-Lin in his arms. “I can eat later once you’re done and can watch her.”

“Or,” Yibo took out a plate, “I could feed you too. I’ve become quite the pro in the last hour,” he smirked.

“Is that so?” Zhan rolled his eyes but didn't refuse the offer.

And so it came to be, Yibo feeding himself and Zhan alternately as the latter kept A-Lin engaged and occupied. Yibo found a repeat telecast of an old motogp race and suddenly Zhan found himself and A-Lin at the receiving end of an hour long commentary on everything grand prix. 

Zhan watched fondly as A-Lin sat against him between his sprawled legs and Yibo lay his head down on his thigh. Pretty soon, as Yibo kept up his endless narration of the race, A-Lin found her way from Zhan’s lap onto Yibo. Yibo was startled into silence mid-sentence when a tiny body crawled over his face and proceeded to settle down comfortably on his chest.

Zhan rushed to place a hand on her back, as she lay on top of Yibo, to steady her. He glanced down at Yibo, who was still stunned, and then watched with unbearable fondness when his arms slowly wrapped themselves around the girl, holding her safely in place. When Zhan was sure that Yibo was fully alert, he let go of her and moved his hand towards Yibo’s.

Yibo felt Zhan’s fingers interlock with his and he met Zhan’s warm gaze. They stayed in that position - Zhan seated on the couch, Yibo laying down, head on Zhan’s lap, A-Lin snuggling on top of him, hands intertwined with Zhan’s on her back - for the rest of the race.

 _There’s something different in his expression._ Zhan mused and his eyes stayed on Yibo and A-Lin as he caressed Yibo’s hair with his other hand. _He looks so…satisfied._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How have you been? let me know in the comments, i soooo miss seeing familiar usernames in the comment section haha!
> 
> Hope you guys got a chance to check out the other yizhan fics i posted in the meantime!  
> \--- [Follow you](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24633400): finished the story finally yay  
> \--- [The plant on Xiao Zhan's head](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25172752): super creative prompt that i picked up and wrote a cutesy, fluffy, lovey yizhan oneshot  
> \--- [Since when](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25299574): slightly angsty/pining oneshot  
> \--- [Kintsugi](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25315300): very angsty oneshot i wrote for a rejected yibo/jealous xz prompt that turned into a whole thing  
> \--- [Gouzai](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25324192): fluffy fluff to soothe your yizhan thirsty soul


	244. What did you say?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New submission for the bjyx prompt fest - [One day](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25758865)
> 
> Yibo gets transported 10 years into the future. He ends up spotting future Xiao Zhan and decides to follow him.

* * *

“Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispered when the race ended. “I think she’s asleep.”

Yibo dared not speak louder or move an inch.

“Do you want me to move her?” Zhan asked softly.

Yibo thought for a second, then shook his head. Zhan leaned forward and placed a kiss on his forehead. Yibo tilted his head back on Zhan’s lap and puckered his lips. Zhan chuckled and shook his head but leaned forward nonetheless and enveloped his lips. 

Their lips met upside down, awkwardly, and they smiled against each other’s lips as Zhan playfully kissed Yibo over and over again. At long last, he trailed more kisses all over his face before sitting up once again.

“You know…if I’m her jiu-jiu,” Yibo mused out loud, “that means you’re more than just a gege to her.”

“Is that so?” Zhan replied absentmindedly as he flipped through channels.

“You’re her jiu-ma!” Yibo proclaimed and proceeded to giggle silently.

“What!?” Zhan whipped his head down to look at a snickering Yibo. “I am NOT your wife!”

“Oh yeah? Then what are you!?” Yibo smirked mischievously. 

“I _will_ be,” Zhan leaned forward and hovered over Yibo as he whispered, “your husband.”

Yibo felt a shiver run down his spine as Zhan uttered those words. 

“Yeah?” Yibo gulped and arched up, reaching for those tempting lips.

“Yeah,” it was Zhan’s turn to smirk now.

“But there’s no term for uncle’s husband,” Yibo went on before he could process his own words.

Zhan froze. Yibo froze. The silence went from comforting to heavy.

“You’re right,” Zhan recovered first and sat back up slowly. “There’s no term for that.”

He resumed flipping through the channels quietly and Yibo remained on his lap, equally quiet.

 _I’m such an idiot. Who says something like that!?_ Yibo grumbled inwardly.

He reached out for Zhan with one hand and fumbled around until he found Zhan’s hand that was clutching the remote a little too tightly. Zhan didn't let go of the remote but Yibo’s fingers kept themselves wrapped around his hand insistently. 

A few seconds later, Zhan sighed and loosened his grip around the remote, though his eyes still remained glued to the TV. He let Yibo hold his hand and felt his entire body relax when Yibo gave his hand a small squeeze.

“Sorry, ge,” Yibo brought Zhan’s hand to his lips and gave it a light kiss.

“You don't have to apologize. You didn't say anything wrong,” Zhan shook his head and glanced down at Yibo. "There's no term for her uncle's husband."

When their eyes met, Yibo could see the shine in Zhan’s eyes. 

“You’re her jiu-jiu too,” Yibo smiled and kissed his hand again.

“Hmm,” Zhan nodded and gave Yibo a small smile but Yibo noticed the way it didn't reach his eyes.

“Zhan-ge,” he tugged at his hand gently. 

“Hmm?” 

“Wo ai ni…”

Zhan let out a soft laugh and pulled Yibo’s hand up to his lips, kissing the back of it for more than just a few seconds.

“Wo ye ai ni, gouzaizai.”

Zhan leaned down and was about to seal their lips together when a sudden movement caught their attention.

“Awwaaaa,” A-Lin’s shaky voice mumbled as she woke up slowly. 

“Ay, gouzaizai,” Zhan cooed as A-Lin tried sitting up.

“I thought I was your puppy!” Yibo frowned and glared at Zhan. 

“Yibo!” Zhan laughed in disbelief. “Are you really jealous?”

“Call her something else,” Yibo pouted and sat up when Zhan took the child off his chest and in his arms. “Only I’m your gouzaizai.”

“Oh dear god,” Zhan rolled his eyes. “A-Lin, what kind of a jiu-jiu do you have?”

A-Lin jumped in Zhan’s arms with a giggle and waved her hands about. 

“Is it time to play, Lin-lin?” Zhan wrinkled his nose and rubbed it against hers which prompted the child to squeal and smack both her hands on Zhan’s cheeks with a loud slap.

“Aahh!” Zhan feigned pain. “Lin-lin is so strong!”

A-Lin giggled some more and kept patting Zhan on his cheeks with both her hands. Zhan puffed up his cheek, bonking their noses together, only letting his cheeks flatten when A-Lin patted them again. Each time, the child giggled harder. Each time, Yibo’s heart melted further, unsure whether it was the child that was causing him to melt or the man that held her.

* * *

“Okay, she’s been screaming bloody murder for the last twenty minutes!” Yibo yelled over the crying child.

“Language, Yibo!” Zhan exclaimed. “And it’s been a whole day, she just misses her mother!” 

He rocked and swayed the child back and forth as he tried distracting her with toys and keys and books, but nothing helped. 

“Jie said she will be here soon,” Yibo kept talking loudly.

“Stop screaming, Bo-di…it won't help her calm down,” Zhan addressed him in a sing-song voice to mask his irritation.

“Okay, okay,” Yibo sighed and pressed his temples. “Sorry.”

“Come on, A-Lin,” Zhan turned his attention back to the weeping child. “Let’s try another game. How about gege-”

“Jiu-jiu,” Yibo corrected immediately.

“Jiu-jiu,” Zhan repeated with a shy smile, “…let jiu-jiu sing for you…”

“And dance!” Yibo winked.

“Shut it,” Zhan dismissed Yibo. 

He began singing a tune but A-Lin’s cries grew louder immediately and Zhan changed the tune at once. Four songs later and A-Lin still wasn't impressed by any of them. 

“Please, sweetheart,” Zhan pleaded, nearly on the verge of tears himself. “Please stop crying!”

Yibo finally approached them and wrapped one arm around Zhan’s waist to comfort him while placing the other hand on A-Lin’s back, massaging it gently. He smiled at Zhan’s distraught face that, despite the exasperation, looked cute and adorable. 

Yibo didn't know what prompted him to do it, but he began humming a tune. Much to his surprise, A-Lin started to calm down a few seconds later. Zhan and Yibo looked at each other, with raised eyebrows and mild disbelief. Then a smile spread on their faces and Zhan joined Yibo in singing the familiar, comforting tune.

_“...bù rú xiāo xiāo sǎ sǎ lì biàn fēng hé làng  
tiān yá yī qǔ gòng yōu yang…”_

Zhan’s eyes crinkled into half moons as their voices united once more with the gentle melody that held more meaning than they could ever explain to the world.

_“...zhǔ yī hú shēng sǐ bēi huān jì shào nián láng  
míng yuè yī jiù hé lái chàng wǎng  
bù ruò tǎn tǎn dàng dàng lì biàn fēng hé làng  
tiān yá yī qǔ gòng yōu yang…” _

They held each other’s gaze, and readied themselves for the last line, tracking each other’s lips.

 _“...tiān yá yī qǔ…”_ Zhan began but paused and smiled, _“...tiān yá yī qǔ gòng yōu yang.”_

“We always mess that up,” Yibo smiled back.

“Always,” Zhan replied softly and then glanced at A-Lin in his arms.

The girl was resting her head against his shoulders, her eyes open and observant, now quiet and content.

“It worked,” Zhan whispered. “A-Lin likes Wuji.”

“Wangxian,” Yibo corrected.

“Wangxian,” Zhan kissed her on her forehead and let her snuggle.

Yibo stepped closer, wrapping his arms around Zhan further and leaned against Zhan’s other shoulder, until he was face to face with the child. 

“What are you thinking?” Zhan steadied A-Lin in his arm, holding her tighter against him, and then wrapped his other arm around Yibo.

“Nothing,” Yibo replied in a barely audible voice. “She’s so cute. But you’re cuter.”

“Yibo!” Zhan chuckled. “You’re such a brat.”

Yibo laughed and looked up at him.

“Juu…” a tiny voice mumbled.

Both men stilled and turned their eyes to the source of the sound.

“Wha-what did you say?” Yibo stood up slowly.

“Say it again, Lin-lin,” Zhan tried to keep his voice steady and calm.

“Juuuuu…” the child pouted her lips and sputtered happily.

“Oh my god…did she just…say jiu?!?” Yibo gasped.

“Juu!!” A-Lin repeated as if to prove him right.

“She called me uncle!” Both Zhan and Yibo exclaimed simultaneously.

“No, she called _me_ uncle,” they repeated again.

Then, with eye rolls and amused snickers, they both leaned in and pressed a kiss on the child’s cheeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CRY WITH ME OVER WUJI/WANGXIAN
> 
> [The first fanmeet](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOJSBUwDDq0)  
> [Thailand fanmeet](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=53gn1QVFtv4)  
> [Nanjing concert day 1](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=klgrMgfNYpw>)  
> [Nanjing concert day 2](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QLK5n1j8bG8)  
> [AND THE BIG ONE FEAT. YIZHAN](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcVNSPXM2Nc)


	245. This year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SOMEHOW I found myself posting another Yizhan AU over the weekend - [Life as we know it](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25812217) \- where professional bike racer!Yibo and designer!Xiao Zhan unexpectedly find their entire lives turned upside down when they are named as the legal guardians of the baby of their now deceased best friends.

* * *

“She said what?” Yibo’s cousin sat in front of the two with her mouth wide open.

“She called us jiujiu!” Yibo exclaimed once more.

“She said something that sounded awfully like ‘jiu’,” Zhan smiled excitedly.

“Well…she is due for her first words,” she looked at the boys and spoke, careful not to pour water over their joy. “Maybe she’s getting there!”

“What do you mean getting there?” Yibo asked her, bewildered. “She said her first words!! Jiu!!”

“Yibo,” she chuckled, “it’s hard to say if she was just repeating a familiar sound or saying an actual word and associating it with you until she does it again, more deliberately and intentionally.”

“Is that true, ge?” Yibo turned to look at Zhan, hoping for some support.

“Ah, Yibo,” Zhan scratched his nose nervously, unsure of how to respond, “maybe Mei-jie is right…maybe A-Lin was just repeating a funny sound and not actually calling us-”

“Juju!!” A-Lin sputtered just then as if to settle the matter once and for all as she lunged from her mother’s arms towards Zhan.

Everyone’s eyes widened as the girl wriggled and stretched, while repeatedly calling out the same word.

“Juju! Juju!”

Zhan reached out and picked her up onto his lap, finally putting an end to her struggles. The girl snuggled in his arms and settled down happily. 

“See,” Yibo nudged Zhan’s arm lightly, “I told you you’re here jiu-jiu too.”

“Of course A-Zhan is her uncle! Why wouldn't he be!? He’s family after all,” Yibo’s cousin smiled and patted Zhan. 

“Apparently he’s more her family than either of us,” Yibo pouted. “She said her first words for him!”

Zhan chuckled even as he felt himself overwhelm with emotion. He shook his head and adjusted A-Lin in his arms.

“Alright, you two,” Yibo’s cousin sighed. “Time for some dinner!”

* * *

When they finished dinner and before they turned in for the night, Zhan and Yibo confirmed their schedule changes to make sure they could stay with A-Lin for half of the next day as well. Mei-jie would be done with her meetings by lunch time and then had an evening flight back.

“I’m so glad I could come even if only for a short bit,” she smiled at them before saying goodnight and heading into her room with a sleepy A-Lin.

When they retired to their room, Zhan and Yibo let out long, tired sighs. 

“This felt like one long ass day,” Yibo muttered and suppressed his yawn. “She really tired me out!”

“Wow…young, sporty, cool guy Wang Yibo…taken down by a one year old child!” Zhan announced with a mock gasp. 

“Shut up!” Yibo grinned and face planted into the bed, letting out a long, relieved groan.

“Come here,” Zhan crawled onto the bed and moved Yibo’s head onto his lap.

“Mmm,” Yibo hummed as Zhan ran his hand through his hair, gently massaging his head. “All your attention was on Lin-Lin today. When we have a baby, you’ll need to balance your time better between us,” Yibo murmured.

Zhan’s hand stilled. A few seconds later, Yibo tilted his head up in Zhan’s lap and on seeing Zhan staring down at him, sat up hurriedly.

“What?” Yibo bit his lip.

“You…you think about that?” Zhan asked slowly.

“About what? Having a baby?” Yibo asked.

Zhan nodded.

“I was just…joking…you know like…hypothetically…it’s not like I want one now,” Yibo shrugged. “But isn’t that what will happen eventually? At some point? A home, a marriage, a family…like everybody else…”

“You know it’s not that simple, Yibo,” Zhan spoke in a low voice.

“I know,” Yibo shuffled closer and held Zhan’s hands. “I know that. But I thought it’s what you want too.”

“Some day…” Zhan’s voice grew thicker with emotion and he spoke with difficulty.

“One day then,” Yibo smiled softly. 

“Come here,” Yibo placed a hand on Zhan’s cheek and brought his face closer.

They were about to seal their lips together when a loud shrill scream rang through the house.

“Wow,” Yibo huffed, “she sure has some strong lungs.”

“Hmm,” Zhan managed a chuckle and then they both winced as A-Lin’s cries grew louder.

The next second, silence resumed. They stayed face to face, mere inches apart, their eyes trained on the shared wall between their room and A-Lin’s. When the silence persisted, they turned their attention back to each other and smiled. 

Yibo leaned in and enveloped Zhan’s lips and both let out soft sighs as they finally got a taste of each other. But just as Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo to pull him closer, the loud cry erupted once again. 

“Maybe one day _way_ into the future,” Yibo grunted and paused their kiss, resting his forehead against Zhan.

“Maybe,” Zhan laughed silently and shook his head. “Mei-jie has an early morning tomorrow as well. Maybe we should-”

“Don't say it,” Yibo clamped his hand over Zhan’s mouth. 

Zhan looked at Yibo knowingly and tilted his head.

“No,” Yibo shook his head.

Zhan kept his eyes fixed on him and crossed his arms across his chest.

“Fiiinnneee,” Yibo groaned and let go of Zhan’s mouth.

The next minute, they knocked on the guest room and were met with a surprised yet apologetic look when it was opened.

“I’m sorry!” Mei-jie frowned. “She’s just-”

“Anything we can do to help?” Zhan beamed.

“Umm, really?” She looked at the smiling Zhan and then at the grumpy Yibo.

Zhan nudged Yibo with his elbow, prompting him to plaster a begrudging smile on his face as well.

“Yeah, of course, jie. You need to sleep properly for your work meetings tomorrow,” Yibo shrugged.

“Well then,” she grinned and made way for them to enter the room. “She’s all yours.”

* * *

The last time Zhan had had this much trouble keeping his eyes open was towards the end of the shooting for the Untamed. He fought the heaviness and opened his eyes with a groan. It took him a few seconds to remember where he was, but when he turned his head and saw Yibo sleeping against his shoulder as they both sat leaning against the headboard of the bed, it all came screaming back.

They had spent the night in the guest room with A-Lin so that Mei-jie could go to sleep in another room. And A-Lin had made the most of their company. They had been woken up every two hours by her screaming and had done everything they could think of to keep her entertained or to make her sleepy once again.

He winced as he stretched the soreness out of his neck, careful not to move too much and disturb Yibo. But Yibo stirred anyway and with a long groan of his own, slowly opened his eyes and sat up.

“Sorry, go back to sleep properly if you want,” Zhan whispered and squeezed his thigh.

Yibo turned to look at him, blinking away his grogginess.

“That was one hell of a night,” Yibo yawned.

“I don't think I have ever felt this tired,” Zhan stretched and agreed.

“How does Mei-jie do this every night!?” Yibo rubbed his eyes.

Zhan picked up his phone to look at the time and was alarmed when he saw that it was already past 9.

“Oh my god, it’s late!” Zhan sat up, fully alert now. “Did Mei-jie-”

“She left me a text,” Yibo interrupted as he checked his phone as well. “She didn't wake us up before leaving. And she says thank you and that this was an unusually bad night for A-Lin and doesn’t happen normally. Lucky us,” Yibo rolled his eyes.

“Well at least she’s still asleep,” Zhan peeked at A-Lin who was sleeping at the center of the bed.

“I hope she stays asleep for some more time,” Yibo suppressed a yawn. 

“It’s just a matter of a few more hours,” Zhan sighed. “And then it’ll be time for her to leave.”

“Hmm,” Yibo mumbled. “Alright, then,” he huffed and sat up finally, “let’s-”

His words were cut short when a hand grabbed him by the neck and turned him back. Before Yibo could think, Zhan’s warm lips were on his and he was being kissed thoroughly and eagerly. When a soft moan escaped Yibo, the mouth tightened around him more and Zhan plunged deeper into him to absorb any further sound. 

Several seconds later, when Zhan pulled back, Yibo let out a choked breath as he looked at the smirking man. 

“Good morning,” Zhan pecked a still dazed Yibo once more before getting off the bed carefully.

“Very good morning, indeed,” Yibo smiled back and licked his lips.

* * *

As the day progressed, Yibo grew more comfortable holding A-Lin as they altered between playing with her and catering to her needs. While Yibo had managed to avoid changing any diapers the previous day, he ran out of excuses this time.

“It doesn’t get cuter with the baby talk, ge!” Yibo wrinkled his nose as he wiped A-Lin’s butt. 

“I’m just telling you what to do,” Zhan kept the baby voice going, “since jiu-jiu has never changed a baby’s diaper before,” he prattled on. 

“Shut up!” Yibo barked.

“Shhh!!!” Zhan smacked Yibo’s arm and looked at him in alarm. “She will start repeating whatever we say. Don't teach her to curse!!”

Yibo smirked but kept quiet. When he strapped on the new diaper after many corrections by Zhan, he held A-Lin and shook her.

“Stays on and everything!!” Yibo exclaimed in triumph.

“Genius,” Zhan rolled his eyes.

“No reward for my achievement?” Yibo pouted as he pretended to speak with A-Lin.

Zhan giggled and leaned in to plant a kiss on Yibo’s cheek.

“That’s all?!” Yibo feigned disbelief, still looking at A-Lin.

“Brat,” Zhan muttered but turned Yibo to face him by the cheek and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

“Your brat,” Yibo whispered back and stole another quick peck.

“Aaarfffbbrrrr,” A-Lin chimed in and leaned in without warning, nearly knocking into their faces.

“Gonna miss her though,” Yibo sighed once she had settled in his arms again.

“We can plan another visit sometime,” Zhan offered. “It’s just January, I’m sure we can find more time over the course of this year.”

“Hmm,” Yibo nodded. “This year…” he suddenly grew quiet.

“This year what?” Zhan repeated when Yibo didn't continue.

“It’s 2020,” Yibo spoke slowly as if suddenly realizing the fact.

“Yeah? So?” Zhan looked at him, amused.

“We have so much happening this year…work projects…spending more time with our families…and…”

“And?”

“October…”

“Oh…” Zhan stilled and they stared at each other in silence.

Slowly, a small smile appeared on their faces.

“You still wanna do it?” Zhan asked finally.

“Of course,” Yibo’s smile grew wary. “Don’t you?”

“No, no. I do!” Zhan rushed to clarify. “I…I just wanted to make sure you-”

“If I had my way, Zhan-ge, we would get married right here right now,” Yibo stated.

Zhan couldn't help the flush that crept from his head to his neck.

“Okay then,” he shuffled closer and intertwined his fingers with Yibo’s. “This year is gonna be amazing,” he smiled from ear to ear. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, in case any one forgot, we are close to the end of Jan in my timeline. And we all know what comes next. Brace yourselves, folks. 2020 is going to shit soon.


	246. What if

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> few important notes!
> 
> 1\. trigger warning: covid
> 
> 2\. i will, henceforth, correct my usage of xz's name and write xiao zhan instead of zhan. i am also going to (slowly) correct this mistake in the previous chapters too. after writing my other fics, it has started to feel weird to use zhan here just for the sake of consistency. 
> 
> 3\. XIAO ZHAN ROSEONLY FML I HAVE QI DEVIATED WITH HIS SOFTNESS AND CUTENESS AND THE YIZHAN CANDIES and in keeping with tradition: when xz appears, so does a new ytty chapter.

* * *

Xiao Zhan dialled the number again but yet again was greeted by the voicemail recording. With a huff, he threw his phone aside and frowned. It had only been a few days since Yibo had left for his TTXS shoot but suddenly, it felt like a whole lot longer. The very next second, he grabbed his phone again and was about to redial when the phone lit up with an incoming call.

“Yibo! Thank god!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed in relief as soon as he answered the call. “I’ve been trying to reach you ever since I saw the news! Are you alright?!”

“Sorry, ge,” Yibo’s muffled voice replied hurriedly. “I’m just wrapping up with the TTXS shoot.”

“Are they still shooting? Didn't they hear the news?” Xiao Zhan’s voice grew increasingly worried.

“They did…everyone’s suddenly buzzing with talks of Wuhan and…” Yibo sighed, “We were close to wrapping up anyway so we finished the episode. What about you?”

“I got done with my dubbing for the day and just got home a while back. So are you flying back to Beijing now?” 

“I…I’m not sure…the travel restrictions are still all over the place and-”

“I checked,” Xiao Zhan interrupted, “and there shouldn't be any restriction between Changsha and Beijing yet, even though you’re really close to Wuhan.”

“But,” Yibo began hesitantly, “mom wants me to quarantine myself in Louyang before-”

“What?!” Xiao Zhan sat up, now fully alert and panicked.

“The Legend of Fei shoot at Hengdian has been cancelled for now,” Yibo explained. “And TTXS shoots have been cancelled too. So…mom wanted me to-”

“To come home,” Xiao Zhan completed with a resigned sigh. 

“I can tell her no-” Yibo spoke softly.

“No, she just wants to see you safe in front of her and you…won’t get another chance like this to spend time with her while your work is on pause.”

“Are you sure? It’s okay, Zhan-ge…I would rather-”

“No, no, it’s okay,” Xiao Zhan tried to speak reassuringly. “Just be safe.”

“Okay…I’ll call you later, alright?”

“Okay,” Xiao Zhan bit his lips and kept his voice steady.

“I love you, ge,” Yibo’s voice reduced to a barely audible whisper that told Xiao Zhan that he was not alone at that moment.

“I love you too, puppy,” Xiao Zhan chuckled and shook his head.

When the call ended, however, Xiao Zhan’s smile faded and he kept the phone down with shaky hands. He unmuted the television and resumed watching the latest news on the lockdown measures that were being increasingly taken in the Hubei province.

As the reporter and panelists discussed the growing cases, the severe implications of the spread of the virus outside Wuhan and even China, and the need for more such measures to better contain the virus and handle the cases, only one thought plagued his mind.

“But what if travel shuts down completely later and you’re stuck at Louyang?” Xiao Zhan whispered to the empty room.

* * *

Yibo was scrolling on his phone, his eyebrows furrowing more and more with every passing second. He kept reading, clicking, and reading some more and only snapped out of his reading spiral when his manager’s hand shook him by the shoulder.

“Yibo!” She called out louder, making him think that she had probably been trying to get his attention for a while. “Are you ready? Your ticket has been rebooked.”

“Thank you,” Yibo picked up his bag and grabbed the ticket. 

“Are you sure?” She eyed him as she let go of the ticket. 

“Yeah,” he nodded and then bit his lips. “I think.”

His manager rolled her eyes and picked up her own bag.

“Come on then,” she led the way. “Guess you’re going home.”

* * *

_“New hospital to be built in Wuhan to control the outbreak.”_

_“Passengers checked for fever at Beijing railway stations.”_

_“Lunar New year public celebrations cancelled in Beijing.”_

_“Close to a thousand cases in China.”_

_“First confirmed cases internationally.”_

_“Fever, tiredness, continuous cough, difficulty breathing.”_

Xiao Zhan sat in front of the television on the rug between the coffee table and couch, knees pulled up to his chest, arms wrapped around himself. He sat rooted to his spot and the hours passed him by as he absorbed all the news and information he could find on the outbreak.

 _Yibo already has a fragile constitution._ Was all Xiao Zhan’s mind could supply.

 _He already coughs so much and his childhood illness- No. Stop thinking pessimistically! He wasn't even in Wuhan._ Xiao Zhan shook his head in an attempt to shake the thoughts out of it. 

_But Changsha is just a few hours away from- No!_

With a grunt, he turned off the television and stood up. He did a double take when he noticed it was past midnight and realized he hadn't had dinner. He checked his phone but there was no new message from Yibo.

_He must still be in flight. I just need to hear his voice. To know he’s okay. Hopefully, we can video call when he reaches his parent’s- no, that’s his home too._

With a long sigh, Xiao Zhan pushed the mild resentment aside and went to the kitchen to prepare himself a meal. But cooking for one seemed loathsome and unappealing suddenly. At that moment, he heard his phone ring and he dashed towards it.

“Yi- oh, hi mama,” Xiao Zhan tried to hide the disappointment in his voice. “No, no, I’m happy you called,” he rushed to explain when his mother caught his tone.

“How are you doing?” She asked sweetly but he could hear the concern and worry in her voice.

“I’ve been following the news too, mama,” Xiao Zhan let out a chuckle. “Guess we both dug ourselves into a hole of worry and stress.”

“Yes,” she chuckled along, “your father finally snatched the remote from my hand and turned the damn TV off.”

“But take care of yourselves and follow all the necessary precautions, okay?” 

“You too…and make sure Yibo does as well. Where is he now?”

“Umm…he is on his way to his parent’s home from Changsha. Aunty wanted him to be at home for some time given…everything.”

“I can understand,” Xiao Zhan’s mother sighed. “I wish I could hide you here as well and make sure you’re safe.”

“I’m safe, I promise,” his voice softened. “I just…I wish-”

“That you could do the same for Yibo?” He could hear the smile in her voice.

“Yeah,” he leaned against the kitchen wall and closed his eyes. “In one of the interviews when we were promoting the Untamed, we were asked which superpower we would want. Both of us wished we could teleport because it would make traveling for work so much easier and less crazy with the fans and everything. Now, I just wish I could teleport him here and keep him safe.”

“He’ll be fine,” she tried to assure him. “Anyway, I just wanted to check on you.”

“I’m okay. For now, my work commitments are going to be put on hold as well. I had some auditions lined up, guess those will have to wait. And some of the projects that were supposed to be finalized…guess those will have to wait too since we don't know when we can start shooting. Things will be clearer in a few weeks, I’m sure...” 

“Okay, but don't forget,” his mother spoke in a stern voice, “that safety and civic sense come first!”

“Of course, mama,” Xiao Zhan grinned. “I know that.”

“Good boy. We’re going to sleep now. I just wanted to hear your voice.”

“Good night, mama. And try not to worry yourself too much!”

As Xiao Zhan kept his phone aside, he thought he heard a sound in the distance. He paused and waited but heard nothing more. Shrugging, he resumed his attempt at cooking some semblance of a meal for himself but then gave up and decided to heat some instant ramen. 

_Some cook I am._ Xiao Zhan snorted at himself. _Maybe when Yibo is back, I can spend more time cooking for us! If we have a few days off work, we could actually spend time together. But that depends on when he’s back of course._ His heart grew heavy. _Hopefully he won't get stranded in Louyang._

Xiao Zhan stood at the kitchen counter, fingers fiddling with the lid of the ramen bowl that was supposed to go in the microwave. He fought the anxious thoughts that were crowding his mind. He willed himself to stop the growing anxiety that was beginning to take the form of a tightness in his chest. 

Just then, he felt a sudden coldness around him. He jumped as he felt a pair of cold arms wrap themselves around his waist and a cold body pressed against his back. He turned around with a yelp but froze with wide eyes when he saw the figure smiling back at him.

“Zhan-ge,” the voice he had been craving to hear spoke.

“Yibo!?” Xiao Zhan croaked. “You…how are you…when…aren’t you supposed to be at your home?”

“I am at my home,” Yibo said in the softest voice.

Xiao Zhan couldn't help but wrap himself around Yibo’s body that was still cold from the weather outside. He embraced him tightly, pulling him closer to his own warmth. 

“But your mom…” Xiao Zhan managed to speak as he gulped down the overwhelming sense of relief he felt.

“She understood,” Yibo placed a kiss on his shoulder and hugged him back.

Xiao Zhan clung to him and planted kisses all over his shoulder, neck, ears and face until their lips finally met. He inhaled Yibo's scent as he wrapped his lips around him desperately. Xiao Zhan smiled when they pulled apart for a brief moment and brushed his nose against Yibo's cold nose lovingly.

"Welcome home." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had seen some info way back that yibo was in louyang for a few days before returning to beijing for the lockdown but there was no real confirmation for the same. 
> 
> P.S. - drop your favorite yizhan rumors/candies from the covid quarantine time period and i will try to incorporate as many as i can in the coming chapters!


	247. Tell me you want me out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With this chapter, we are done with January 2020. 
> 
> Also, chapter 3 of - [Life as we know it](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25812217) \- is out!

* * *

“I can't believe this is our life now,” Yibo smiled and yawned as he stretched all over their bed. “This is what normal couples do? Spend as much time together as they can!”

“Good morning to you too,” Xiao Zhan chuckled. 

It was three days into lockdown and Yibo still hadn't adjusted to the fact that they had all the time in the world together now. It had been everything they had wanted despite the circumstances in which they were granted this blessing. 

Getting up when they wanted, having breakfast together, spending the whole day doing just as they pleased, curling up around each other on the couch, watching movies they had meant to watch in forever, playing games with each other, reading, assembling legos, talking, fighting, making love. It was heaven. 

Although he did have a bet going with himself that Yibo would tire of being stuck indoors by the end of the week. He almost chuckled at the thought of Yibo pouting wistfully at the thought of his motorbike, sitting idly in the garage. 

“What’s funny?” Yibo’s voice brought Xiao Zhan back to reality.

“Nothing, just wondering when you’ll get bored of...all this _normal_ stuff,” he chuckled.

“Never,” Yibo stated stubbornly and pulled Xiao Zhan back into bed before he could leave. “If I had to choose, I would choose this over working any day!”

“Aya gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan laughed fondly, “you don’t know what you’re saying. You would be bored out of your wits if you didn't have work to do.”

“I wouldn’t!” Yibo insisted stubbornly again. “I would still choose this.”

“Fine! Fine!” Xiao Zhan relented. “It’s a good thing you don't have to choose. A few weeks and things should go back to normal…our normal.”

“Wouldn’t you?” Yibo snuggled against Xiao Zhan, forcing him to settle back into bed.

“Wouldn't I what?”

“Wouldn't you choose this…over working?”

“Do you want a serious answer or is this just pillow talk?” Xiao Zhan smirked.

“You!!” Yibo whined and smacked him with a pillow.

“I’m going to get back at you for that!!” Xiao Zhan growled happily and lunged at Yibo, pinning him down.

“No…no tick-tickling!!” Yibo stuttered between laughs. “Please, ge!!!”

“How about another form of punishment?” Xiao Zhan whispered as he rolled his body against Yibo and buried his face in his neck, sucking kisses onto the bare skin.

“Mmm…” Yibo angled his neck further. “Much better.”

“Brat,” Xiao Zhan grinned against his skin but kept kissing his way around the vast expanse of Yibo’s throat. 

Yibo hummed and sighed happily as Xiao Zhan lavished him with kisses all over. 

“Wanna…?” Xiao Zhan murmured against his ear as he licked the soft lobe. 

“Hmm,” Yibo nodded once, breathless and aroused.

Xiao Zhan interlaced their fingers together and pinned Yibo’s hands to the bed as he took him by the lips. He deepened the kiss immediately and kept rolling his hips against Yibo’s growing erection. 

“Zhan-ge…” Yibo breathed as Xiao Zhan’s tongue made its way along his jawline. 

“I can leave all the marks I want now,” Xiao Zhan whispered.

“All the marks you want,” Yibo moaned as Xiao Zhan sank his teeth below Yibo’s adam’s apple. 

He sucked yet another fresh red wilt into Yibo’s pale skin and pulled back to admire his work. 

“Ge,” Yibo mewled as he writhed underneath him. 

Xiao Zhan’s eyes darkened as he watched Yibo’s lips part and tremble. 

“Think you’re still loose from last night?” 

“Mn,” Yibo nodded and grabbed Xiao Zhan by the neck pulling him in for another rough kiss. 

Xiao Zhan hurriedly took off their pyjamas which were the only things between their naked bodies at the moment. He ran his hands all over Yibo as they kissed furiously, spurred on by the memories of the previous night.

They tussled and tumbled around the bed, attacking each other with their lips and hands, until they were a tangle of limbs and hot, heavy breaths. 

“Fuck, I love you so much,” Xiao Zhan growled and he bit into Yibo’s chest as his hand found Yibo’s now fully erect length. 

“Ge…” Yibo groaned in satisfaction when Xiao Zhan gave him a light tug.

Xiao Zhan grabbed some lube and with his other hand, explored Yibo’s rim. 

“Still pretty loose,” Xiao Zhan grinned and inserted two fingers in easily.

“You-ahh,” Yibo gasped as Xiao Zhan found his prostate and began pleasuring him right away.

“I what?” Xiao Zhan smirked.

“Ge…I…you…” Yibo was reduced to a blubbering mess as one hand prodded his spot while the other worked his erection in the perfect rhythm. 

Xiao Zhan watched the beautiful body that lay in front of him, writhe and shiver at his every touch. He felt his own dick twitch with renewed interest at the gorgeous sight his boyfriend made.

“I want to come with you inside me…please…” Yibo moaned when Xiao Zhan didn't stop his ministrations. 

“Why? Don’t think you can go twice?” Xiao Zhan winked but he was already getting himself lined up with Yibo’s opening.

“Just put it in, Xiao Zhan,” Yibo grunted as his hips buckled up, pushing his rim against Xiao Zhan’s dick impatiently.

“Fuck,” Xiao Zhan hissed as he began penetrating Yibo. “Fuck, you’re so good…you feel so fucking good.”

Yibo sighed in satisfaction and threw his head back on the pillow as Xiao Zhan bottomed out.

“Fuck, Yibo…” Xiao Zhan moaned in return as he began moving. “You can't get me into the habit of fucking every single day,” he spoke breathlessly as he thrust into Yibo.

“You were the one who started this,” Yibo grunted back as he began stroking himself in time with Xiao Zhan’s thrusts.

“Can you blame me?” Xiao Zhan smirked as he changed his angle just the slightest to go in deeper.

“Aahh!” Yibo exclaimed, drowning in pleasure, his hands faltering for a bit.

“My fiance has an ass that makes me wanna rail the fucking daylights out of him,” Xiao Zhan growled yet again as he clamped down on Yibo’s hips and began thrusting harder.

“Fuck!” Yibo cried as he came gushing into his hand and all over his stomach on hearing Xiao Zhan’s words.

Xiao Zhan fucked Yibo through his orgasm and when he came with a helpless gasp, he planted himself deep inside him. He knelt forward and rested his forehead on Yibo’s chest as they caught their breath once more. 

Yibo grabbed a tissue and wiped his hand and stomach so that Xiao Zhan could lay on top of him as they calmed down. Xiao Zhan stayed embedded in him as Yibo wrapped his arms around him, pulling him closer.

“I love you too,” Yibo whispered as he let out a long exhale.

“I don't want to get up,” Xiao Zhan confessed as he moved ever so lightly inside Yibo. “Feels comfortable and warm in you.”

“Shut up!” Yibo giggled even as he flushed redder than he already was.

“Tell me you want me out,” Xiao Zhan grinned mischievously.

“Shut up,” Yibo whispered this time and tightened his arms around him, holding him in place. 

* * *

“Ge!” Yibo called out from the front door. “There’s a package here from ma!”

“My ma?”

“Yeah,” Yibo rushed upstairs two steps at a time with the box in his hand.

“What is it?” Xiao Zhan peered over Yibo’s shoulder as he opened it.

“Some bottles and packets of…ohh…herbs…?” Yibo mumbled. “Does she want us to be more fertile so we can give her grandchildren, Zhan-ge?” Yibo cackled.

“Shut up!” Xiao Zhan smacked the laughing boy and rolled his eyes. “There’s a note in here. These are chinese medicines to help with our immunity. Because of all this virus stuff,” he sighed and smiled at the thought of his sweet mother and her concern for both him and Yibo. 

Just then, Yibo’s phone began ringing.

“Hello, Han-ge! Yes, we’re doing good. How are you, Han-ge?” Yibo smiled happily as Xiao Zhan put the box aside and kept the medicines in the cabinet.

“Oh…every day? From home?”

“No, of course I’ll do it, Han-ge.”

“I’m sure I can manage it!”

Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow when Yibo ended the call.

“Since TTXS is going to be off air for a while, they want to do an online spin off of sorts. With everyone joining the group video call from their homes.”

“We have spare rooms,” Xiao Zhan thought it over. “You should be able to do it from one of them.”

“Really? You don't want me to go to my old apartment for the taping?”

“In this situation? No way am I sending you anywhere unnecessarily!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed. 

“But the viewers will get to see me in my home,” Yibo countered even as his heart rejoiced over Xiao Zhan’s words.

“You can keep a plain wall in the background and we can prep some of the guest rooms and kitchen if needed to pull it off.”

“And what if my staff needs to come over to help set up and do make up and all?” Yibo probed further.

“Well, your immediate staff already knows and if they need to be here, then they need to be here,” Xiao Zhan smiled and cupped Yibo’s face in his hands. 

“Are you sure?”

“Of course, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan rubbed their noses together and placed a soft kiss on Yibo’s lips. “It’ll be fine. The viewers won’t be able to tell that we live together. Now come on, let’s cook something. I’m going to feed you properly while I can!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Candy referenced (please remember this is all cpn/fake candy/delulu) - 
> 
> When Yibo said he is having mom's herbal medicine during lockdown, everyone speculated that he might have been referencing XZ's mom because he normally references his mom as 'my mom' and not just 'mom'.
> 
> https://twitter.com/Ventus1821/status/1276534223831052288?s=20
> 
> Also, watch me squint @ the way he looks off screen before saying that he was having the chinese medicines mom sent him and the grin after that!!!!


	248. Like what you see?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG I AM LOSING IT Y'ALL SO MUCH XIAO ZHAN UPDATE AND YIZHAN CANDY IM DYING!!! IN HONOR OF 8.23 (kadian for bo ai zhan) DAY AND OF ALL THIS NEW CONTENT, I AM POSTING ANOTHER CHAPTER!!
> 
> 1\. XZ DOUYIN UPDATE - he tried beijing snacks, he made cute faces, he flexed his arm muscles akkdkankjjdnsn AND WEARS A RING AND HE HAD IT ON HIS NECKLACE IN THE VIDEO. MY HEADCANON IS TRUE. IM DYING. PART OF YTTY CAME TRUE Y'ALL!!!!!  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhanfanclub/status/1297078947826540545?s=19  
> https://twitter.com/GusuLan8125/status/1297524570929287169?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/yizhanity/status/1297437825617391616?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1297432370811932673?s=20
> 
> 2\. Apparently, 8.23 is also the anniversary of the wrap up of the shoot of untamed (of course it! the coincidences with these two smh).  
> https://twitter.com/GusuEdits/status/1297517346085654528?s=20
> 
> 3\. Yibo douyin update - he selected the numbers 3 (zhan) and 8 (bo) on this day of all days of course. (he also did another weibo post kadian at time marker 13:00 which is 'yizhan'.)  
> https://twitter.com/renaurrr/status/1297487463154294785?s=19
> 
> AND SO HERE WE ARE, WHEN XZ APPEARS, SO DOES A YTTY CHAPTER!!!!

* * *

Much to Xiao Zhan’s surprise, as the days passed them by, Yibo didn't get sick of being in quarantine. He did get bored from time to time especially since he couldn't be as physically active as he was used to but he found ways to keep himself occupied with his dancing and legos. For Xiao Zhan himself, he was getting exactly what he wanted - time. 

Time that he had been so desperate for in 2019. Time to spend with the love of his life. Time to stay in touch with his friends and family. Time to learn how to cook new dishes and paint more. Time to read. Time to breathe and just be, so he could figure out who he was once again. 

He had begun to feel like he had lost touch with himself in the chaos of his rise to stardom. And now he was getting back in touch with everything that made him Xiao Zhan. All the parts of him in addition to his role as an entertainer that made him the whole he was. 

As he kneaded the dough for the bread he was attempting to bake that morning, he felt two arms snake their way around his waist.

“Good morning,” Xiao Zhan smiled and kissed the temple of the sleepy head that rested against his shoulder now. 

“Mmm,” Yibo replied and nuzzled against his back.

“Let me finish this, hold on,” Xiao Zhan chuckled and wrapped up the dough unhurriedly.

Yibo glanced every now and then but remained quietly at his back for the most part. When Xiao Zhan tried to move to the side to wash his hands in the sink, Yibo followed, stuck to his back like a koala. Finally, Xiao Zhan wiped his hands on a towel and turned around.

“Hey,” Xiao Zhan smiled brightly.

“Hey,” Yibo smiled back and leaned in for a kiss.

They sealed their lips together and Xiao Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo as he played with his lips.

“I’m gonna grow fat if you keep baking new things everyday,” Yibo murmured against his lips as they planted kisses on each other. “We’ll have continuity issues when I go back for Legend of Fei.”

“Then there’s just more of you to love,” Xiao Zhan replied back as he lost himself in the soft touches of Yibo’s lips against his. 

“Oh yeah?” Yibo grinned as he sucked on the corner of Xiao Zhan’s mouth.

“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan grinned back and snapped at his chin playfully. 

The two hours of wait for the dough to rise went by quicker than Xiao Zhan had imagined as they spent the time together. Yibo sat atop the kitchen counter and Xiao Zhan stood between his legs, as they alternated between talking about anything and everything under the sun and pecking at each other’s lips and neck and ears. 

It was heaven. 

* * *

They had fallen into a routine. Xiao Zhan would always wake up first since Yibo tended to stay up later than him most nights. He would enjoy the alone time in the house, starting his day off with a warm beverage and some reading. He would prepare breakfast for himself and Yibo around which time Yibo would wake up and cling to him for a bit. Sometimes, he would manage to go back to bed to announce that breakfast was ready and wake Yibo up himself which would inevitably lead to more clinging and then some. 

The mornings would go by in idle chatter, Yibo assembling his legos or watching anything to do with sports and racing while Xiao Zhan would spend the time sketching or reading. After having lunch together, they would usually spend some time by themselves for work. Yibo would condition himself by dancing and rehearsing his lines for Legend of Fei and the other upcoming shows while Xiao Zhan would condition his vocal cords, exercise and go over the never ending stream of potential projects his manager would somehow keep sending him.

They would come together again towards early evening and resume their conversations or spend the time watching a movie or show or playing games against each other until it was time for dinner. Xiao Zhan got back to his old habit of going for a run at night. It used to be one of his favorite things to do before he got too famous to be able to run outside freely. But now, he could run outside in the security of his property late at night and no one would know. It was the best way to clear his mind.

It was perfect. Everything about their time together in quarantine was perfect. 

* * *

Yibo turned the music off and wiped his face and neck with the towel at hand. Having finished his dance conditioning for the day, he stepped out of his makeshift studio room and sought out Xiao Zhan.

He found him in the living room, exercising. Doing push ups to be precise. Doing them shirtless in just sweats to be completely accurate. 

And it seemed that he had been working out for a while because Yibo could see the sweat glistening on his naked skin. Yibo gulped at the sight and took another sip of the water from the bottle in his hand. 

“Like what you see, Lao Wang?” Xiao Zhan spoke suddenly, his eyes still facing down as he did a few more reps.

Yibo startled at being caught and at the use of an old nickname from their Untamed days.

“It’s been over a year since you called me that,” Yibo chose to reply instead.

“Yeah not since the untamed shoot, huh?” Xiao Zhan finally looked with a grin but then paused when he saw Yibo.

Yibo was a sweaty mess himself having just danced for an hour. He was in basketball shorts and a sleeveless shirt with a towel hanging from his neck. 

“Done dancing?” Xiao Zhan stood up and walked to Yibo.

“Hmm, you finished exercising?” Yibo swallowed again as Xiao Zhan stood dangerously close.

“Yeah, for now,” Xiao Zhan replied and took the towel from Yibo’s neck and wiped himself with it.

“For now? You gonna work out some more?”

“Maybe,” Xiao Zhan spoke slowly as he dabbed Yibo’s neck lightly with the towel, “there’s this one exercise I’m dying to try but I can’t do it alone.”

“I can help,” Yibo offered with a smirk of his own this time, “after all, what else are fiances for? Where do I need to hold you to support you through this exercise?” He asked as he ran his hands all over Xiao Zhan’s sweaty body. 

“Shut up!” Xiao Zhan laughed and pushed Yibo’s hand away. “This exercise is different. Needs us to shower first. And then wear some different clothes.”

“Huh?” Yibo raised his eyebrows, now thoroughly confused. 

“Come with me,” Xiao Zhan leaned in and pressed a quick hot kiss against Yibo’s lips before leading him to their room.

When they reached the bedroom, Xiao Zhan pulled out two bags from the storage unit in the closet and handed one to him after peeking into it. 

“Go to the other room and shower and wear this,” Xiao Zhan instructed. “Come back here when you’re…ready.”

“Ge, I am so confused! What is thi-”

“No peeking!” Xiao Zhan slapped Yibo’s arm lightly. “Just go to the other room…you’ll understand soon.”

“But why can't we shower together?” Yibo crowded Xiao Zhan into the corner of the closet as he ran his hand up his naked chest with a pout.

“Because,” Xiao Zhan leaned forward and whispered in Yibo’s ear, “otherwise we’ll end up doing part of the exercise in the shower.”

“Oh…”

“Mhmm,” Xiao Zhan pulled back and shot Yibo a knowing look.

“Fuck…what’s in the bag, ge?” Yibo’s lips whispered back, hovering over Xiao Zhan’s smirking lips.

Xiao Zhan closed the distance and sealed their lips together. Yibo pushed him back against the wall, crowding in on him further, and grabbed at his naked torso hungrily as the kiss turned messy and heated. Just as Yibo started grinding against him, Xiao Zhan pushed him back and shook his head with a mischievous smile.

“Wait a bit, Lao Wang,” he chuckled.

“Ge!!” Yibo whined but was turned around and given a smack on the butt.

“Get out…come on, trust me.”

“Fine!!” Yibo rolled his eyes and left, leaving behind an excited Xiao Zhan who jumped into the shower alone and impatient for what was to come.

* * *

Xiao Zhan had to wait for several minutes even after getting ready himself. He was about to go outside and check on Yibo when he heard footsteps approaching the room.

When Yibo appeared, his jaw dropped. With the rustling of fabric, in walked Yibo dressed from head to toe as Lan Wangji.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (we are in the first week of feb right now in the story)
> 
> finally got to incorporate this headcanon of mine into the story sksksksksk - https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1284625118757412864?s=20
> 
> and yes, lwj-wwx roleplay is finally happening sksksksksksksksksk


	249. Only ever for you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> new fics i've posted recently:
> 
> 1\. [i feel pink](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26086720) \- soft, fluffy zsww smut fic!
> 
> 2\. [safe space](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25981042) \- short yizhan au one shot
> 
> 3\. [life as we know it](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25812217) \- chapter 4 is out!

* * *

“Fuck,” Xiao Zhan muttered under his breath as Yibo stepped into the room.

He was in full costume minus the wig, but it didn't matter. Yibo’s entire countenance had transformed. He was in character from head to toe, from his eyes to his little pinky, from his expression to his body language. There was no mistake. He was Hanguang-jun.

“Cursing is forbidden in Gusu,” Yibo spoke in a solemn, low voice, his eyes glancing at Xiao Zhan for the briefest of seconds before resuming to look at a vague point between them.

He stood gracefully one arm folded behind his back, chin poised, back straight, and expression carefully blank. 

“Wei Ying,” he spoke again and then proceeded to bring his hands together in front of him and bow. 

Xiao Zhan snapped out of his daze and smirked. 

“Lan Zhan, ah Lan Zhan,” he chided the man, “no need for such formalities with your soon to be husband,” Xiao Zhan feigned a pouty whine. 

Yibo visibly froze at the sentence, although it was a very miniscule reaction, noticeable only because of Xiao Zhan’s extensive experience with him as Lan Wangji. Xiao Zhan grinned and stepped towards Yibo who finally met his gaze and took another step forward as well. 

Xiao Zhan’s eyes roamed Yibo’s entire being and he drank in the sight that stood before him. Yibo’s pale skin, his intense eyes, his pressed lips. His eyes trailed down the lean figure wrapped in blue and white, reminding him of the blue sky and white clouds. He felt a sudden thirst for what lay beneath all those layers of clothing. He looked back up and his eyes were immediately drawn to the ribbon tied neatly and perfectly around Yibo’s forehead.

Xiao Zhan reached out to run his fingers over it but Yibo moved aside to dodge him.

“Wei Ying, behave,” Yibo spoke.

“Ah Lan Zhan,” Xiao Zhan pouted flirtatiously, “I have every right to touch your headband now. After all, we are to be husbands,” he added with a whisper.

“Not yet,” Yibo murmured back in a thick, low voice.

“Aya!” Xiao Zhan placed a hand on his chest and exclaimed. “You wound me, Hanguang-jun! I am hurt!”

“Wei Ying,” Yibo said with a scolding in his voice.

“What else can I not do yet, Lan Zhan!?” Xiao Zhan went on anyway. “Do we have to wait for another 16 years!?”

There was a flicker of emotion in Yibo’s eyes suddenly. A mix of pain and fear that was unmistakable. 

“Never,” Yibo replied quickly as he stepped closer to Xiao Zhan. “Never separating again.”

* * *

Yibo ran his hands down the costume one last time before finally stepping into the door to their bedroom. He froze instantly when he saw Xiao Zhan dressed from head to toe as Wei Wuxian in red and black. 

His breath caught when Xiao Zhan looked at him and suddenly it was summer 2018 again. Suddenly, they were Lan Zhan and Wei Ying again. Suddenly, it was before everything again. Suddenly, he remembered what it had felt like to want Xiao Zhan all that time and not have him.

And when Xiao Zhan said those words, his brain sounded alarm bells.

“Never,” Yibo replied quickly as he stepped closer to Xiao Zhan. “Never separating again.”

Yibo watched with a tightness in his chest as Xiao Zhan’s face morphed from a pout to surprise to that familiar smile he had reserved for Wei Ying and Lan Zhan. Yibo’s heart thudded in his chest as Xiao Zhan placed a hand on his chest and whispered.

“I’m not going anywhere, Lan Zhan. Not this time. Not ever.”

“Wei Ying,” Yibo couldn't help himself as he felt a multitude of emotions sweep him as he thought of how, despite it all, Xiao Zhan and him had ended up together and would be together always. “Stay with me.”

“It’s always a yes from me, Lan Zhan!” Xiao Zhan laughed softly and nodded. “I’ll do whatever you say,” he added with a wink.

“Wei Ying,” Yibo sighed, “behave.”

“Lan Zhan!” Xiao Zhan threw his arms around Yibo’s neck and drawled. “Don’t stop! You were being so romantic!”

“Only for Wei Ying,” Yibo cupped Xiao Zhan’s cheek prompting the man to burst into a radiant smile. 

“Lan Zhan!” Xiao Zhan rubbed their noses together. “What else is only for me?”

Yibo let his lips curve into the smallest of smiles as he gently touched Xiao Zhan’s ear.

“This smile,” Xiao Zhan spoke softly.

“Only for you.”

“Your touches,” Xiao Zhan whispered as he leaned into Yibo’s touch.

“All of it, only ever for you,” Yibo whispered back and he slid his hands down Xiao Zhan’s neck, arms, sides, and rested them at his thin waist that was now highlighted beautifully by the costume.

“Then touch me, Lan Zhan,” Xiao Zhan’s lips hovered over Yibo’s.

* * *

Xiao Zhan began breathing heavily. He felt a heightened sense of need and want as Yibo’s words turned his insides into knots and his knees weak. 

“Wei Ying,” Yibo tightened his grip around the man’s waist.

“Lan Zhan,” Xiao Zhan pressed closer.

Yibo wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan until their bodies were pressed against each other with no space to spare. Xiao Zhan looked into the face that was so distinctly Lan Wangji’s yet still of his Yibo. He remembered how much he had desired and pined for when they were shooting A-Ling and how much he had held back. All he wanted then was for Yibo to want him back. 

And now he did. And the sheer thought made Xiao Zhan dizzy with delight. He couldn't imagine going through a separation like Lan Wangji and Wei Ying. Nothing the world could throw at them could separate him from Yibo. It was another thing that Xiao Zhan couldn't even begin to relate to what Wei Wuxian had been through. And he was thankful for that and never wanted to find out.

“Kiss me, Lan Zhan,” Xiao Zhan found himself begging as he craved for Yibo.

Yibo pushed Xiao Zhan back, walking with him, until he had him up against the wall. He eyed him hungrily as Xiao Zhan rested his head back and raised his chin up, exposing his neck. Yibo looked down the bare skin with a gulp and licked his lips. 

“Do you not want me, Lan Zhan?” Xiao Zhan feigned a pout and rolled his body up to meet Yibo.

Yibo shut his eyes and took in a deep breath before pinning Xiao Zhan’s hands over his head and glaring at him.

“I will always want you,” Yibo replied in a voice that made Xiao Zhan feel something hot boil in the pit of his stomach.

“All lies!” Xiao Zhan teased and goaded. “If Lan Zhan wanted me, he would have kissed me by-mppff!”

Xiao Zhan’s eyes widened before closing when Yibo suddenly jumped forward and crashed his lips against him. Xiao Zhan moaned and Yibo plunged in without hesitation. There was something familiar yet new about the kiss. It was a taste he recognized but a desperation he didn't. And Xiao Zhan let himself drown in it.

He was yanked out of the drowning state only when Xiao Zhan found himself being suddenly flipped around. He gasped in surprise as he felt himself being pushed against the wall and Yibo pressing up behind him. Even through the layered robes, he could feel Yibo’s erection and Xiao Zhan swallowed the pure lust that was now coursing through his veins.

“Lan Zhan…” he found himself begging, “Lan er gege,” he mewled as he moved his ass into Yibo’s hips, rolling around and pushing back, drawing silent groans from Yibo who held him in place firmly.

“I want Wei Ying,” Yibo finally managed to say as he kept grinding against Xiao Zhan’s ass. 

“You have me,” Xiao Zhan groaned as Yibo palmed his own hardening length through the robes, “Do what you want, Lan er gege!”

Xiao Zhan didn't have to repeat himself again. He was dragged to the bed and pushed forward onto it until he was on all fours. Yibo reached for the lube and then reached inside Xiao Zhan’s robes with the lubed hand. He was about to carefully begin prepping him when his finger slid in easily. 

Xiao Zhan looked over his shoulder and grinned. Yibo raised an eyebrow and slid two fingers in easily. Curious, he tried adding a third finger and it slipped in fairly easily as well. Someone had prepared well.

A sudden urge to take what was his took over Yibo and he rolled Xiao Zhan’s robes up to his hips and pushed his own robes up as well. Both could feel the heat rising in their bodies as Yibo applied lube on himself and then then lined himself with Xiao Zhan.

“Lan er gege,” Xiao Zhan hummed pleadingly and that was enough to throw any last reserves of Yibo’s patience out the window. 

He drove into Xiao Zhan, bottoming out quickly, causing Xiao Zhan’s body to lurch forward. But he kept his vice grip on his hips even as Xiao Zhan moaned in pain and pleasure. Xiao Zhan shook with the force of Yibo’s intrusion. But a few seconds later, he moved his hips, begging for more. 

Yibo smirked and began moving inside him, pulling out and thrusting back in, deeper each time.

“Aahh,” Xiao Zhan moaned as he arched his back. 

Yibo grabbed the enticingly thin waist and rammed into him again. Xiao Zhan twisted around to face Yibo while keeping his lower body crouched beneath him. Their lips met hungrily as Yibo pounded into him over and over again while palming Xiao Zhan over the robe menacingly.

“Lan Zha-aaahhh,” Xiao Zhan’s moans grew louder and unbearably more erotic. “Have mercy, er gege!”

Yibo turned red from his ears to his neck as Xiao Zhan spoke in the most flirty and pouty Wei Ying voice he could summon. But something about him calling him ‘gege’ felt different and hit him in all the right places.

His thrusts became harder and faster as Xiao Zhan begged him for mercy. With every plead, he just went faster and deeper. 

“Wei Ying,” Yibo managed to grunt as Xiao Zhan’s hands found their way behind him and wrapped themselves around whichever part of Yibo’s body they could find.

He slid one hand inside Xiao Zhan’s robes and played with his nipples as they kissed desperately. Xiao Zhan could feel himself chasing the high with Yibo inside him and he needed to feel Yibo all around him, he needed to feel Yibo enclose all of him, he needed to see, hear, feel, smell only Yibo and nothing else.

“Er gege,” Xiao Zhan repeated over and over again, his voice growing more helpless with every thrust. “Spare me,” he clutched Yibo’s robes and sighed and winced as Yibo drove into him relentlessly.

With one final, particularly maddening, thrust of Yibo's hips, Xiao Zhan fell forward onto the bed as he came followed soon after by Yibo who lost all control of himself as Xiao Zhan turned into a writhing mess of _‘er gege’_ and _‘Bo-ge’_. 

“Aahhh,” Yibo grunted and fell on top of Xiao Zhan.

He came furiously and endlessly until there was no energy within him to move. Yibo let out a low groan as he finally collapsed beside Xiao Zhan.

“You…you called me Bo-ge,” Yibo breathed out when he finally managed to catch his breath.

“Came in the flow,” Xiao Zhan uncoiled and turned around to face Yibo. “But I’ve called you that before.”

“That was different…we were joking around then…and now…this time…”

“Didn’t like it?” Xiao Zhan rested his chin on Yibo’s chest and asked.

“I didn't say that,” Yibo blushed hard.

“Oh,” Xiao Zhan smirked, “so you liked it a little too much, Bo-ge?”

“Stop it, ge…I can't go again yet!” Yibo ran a hand down his face as Xiao Zhan trailed a finger down his neck.

“Okay, but I’ll keep this in mind,” Xiao Zhan kissed Yibo’s cheek before whispering in his ear one last time, “ _Bo-ge_.”

“God!!” Yibo groaned and then clamped a hand on Xiao Zhan’s mouth.

“So…how did you like the surprise?” Xiao Zhan chuckled and moved his hand aside.

“Fuck, ge,” Yibo raised his head and planted a strong, rough kiss on Xiao Zhan’s lips. “It felt so…different…”

“Good-different?” Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow.

“Great-different,” Yibo reassured him and nodded.

“Good,” Xiao Zhan smiled and leaned back in, “maybe next time…we can manage to do the wigs as well,” he grinned before sealing their lips together. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XZ calling Yibo Ge/Bo-ge -
> 
> https://twitter.com/GNana2030/status/1197337773989974016?s=20


	250. My entire world

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe this story is 250 chapters old now!
> 
> Also, thank you for the love you have given to - [I feel pink](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26086720). If you liked mizmelodrama and my collab and would like to read more stuff we may write and post soon, subscribe to/bookmark our series - [MizPari Tales](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1896949) \- where we will post our collab fics! It will have more Yizhan and also other ships!!!

* * *

Before they knew it, it was already time for Yibo to begin his daily cloud time episodes. He would be on daily for an hour or so and chat with his TTXS brothers and the guests. Yibo felt conflicted. He was happy to have some work related thing to focus on once more, but he was definitely not looking forward to showing people a glimpse of his personal life or keep up with conversations with every new guest. 

In the end, though, his excitement for working again won over and he enthusiastically set up a space in their study room for him to join the video calls from. Xiao Zhan sat in the room as well, on Yibo’s insistence-

“So that I can look at you when I’m bored, ge!” Yibo put on a pout as he tried to convince Xiao Zhan to keep him company.

“What’s the use, Bo-di? It’s not like I can talk to you when you’re bored or join you!” Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes, but he relented as always.

“I’m going to wear the pink hoodie,” Yibo grinned when he realized he had won the argument.

“Are you cold?” Xiao Zhan inquired with mild worry. 

“No, I just…feel pink,” Yibo smiled and leaned in for a kiss.

Xiao Zhan smiled against the soft lips that were gently kissing him. He wrapped Yibo in his arms and cupped the back of his neck, deepening the kiss until Yibo’s lips were sufficiently red and plump.

“I love you,” Xiao Zhan kissed his nose and then proceeded to turn him around in the direction of the desk and push him towards it with a pat on his bum. “Now go, it’s almost time.”

“I think I’ll show them some of the new card tricks!” Yibo exclaimed as he set up the camera.

“Thank god! I could use a break from being your constant guinea pig!” Xiao Zhan raised his hands to the sky dramatically and then smirked.

“I thought you enjoyed me practising my magic with you,” Yibo asked, suddenly serious and a little hurt.

“Aya! Of course, I do. I was joking!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed.

“Hmm,” Yibo replied and proceeded to finish setting up in silence.

“Oh my god!” Xiao Zhan sighed and stared at the dejected boy. “Come here,” he pointed to the space in front of him as he stood on the other side of the desk.

Yibo trudged over and stood with his arms across his chest.

“I was joking, gou zai zai,” Xiao Zhan cupped his cheek and repeated.

Yibo looked into his eyes for several seconds before smiling and nodding finally.

“I know!” He grinned.

“Brat!” Xiao Zhan smacked his arm and chuckled.

“I love you more,” Yibo grinned wider and kissed Xiao Zhan.

“Not possible,” Xiao Zhan ruffled his soft, messy bands and smiled softly.

* * *

The episodes went by quickly enough, much to Yibo’s relief. It was fun seeing everyone over video everyday even if sometimes the topics and chatter got boring. There were times when Yibo wished he could bring Xiao Zhan on the video beside him like the other guests did with their family members. 

Several times, Yibo found himself close to accidentally letting on that he was not living alone through quarantine. He had to pick his words carefully and even though it annoyed him no end, sometimes he had to lie. Like when they asked him about his eating habits during quarantine, Yibo had to remind himself to answer appropriately. 

Or when they asked if he celebrated anniversaries and had a sense of ritual with loved ones, and Yibo had replied, keeping his single image in mind. But sometimes, he would find ways to frame his words smartly. Like when he almost spilled the beans on Xiao Zhan’s mother sending them medicines to boost their immunity. 

It had been a good idea to have Xiao Zhan around, because he got bored often and found it pleasing to have something else to focus on every now and then. But after his TTXS brothers teased him about looking off camera too often in the first few episodes, he kept that habit under control as well. It was hard with Xiao Zhan sitting across him, engrossed in a book or sketching something and smiling at him each time their eyes met. But Yibo was nothing if not a professional.

That professionalism almost went out the window twice. Once when he laughed so hard that he accidentally tugged on the camera and it tilted to one side, revealing two drinks on the desk - one his and one Xiao Zhan’s. He quickly adjusted the camera again, thankful that it hadn't fallen completely or else the whole of China would have seen Xiao Zhan sitting across him. 

The other time, during a game, when Yibo had to repeat a particularly cheesy line - ‘I can’t give you the whole world, but I can give you my world’ - and Xiao Zhan’s eyes had boggled at hearing him utter those words out of context since he had earphones on. Yibo had blushed and giggled, hiding his face, and Xiao Zhan had, without thinking, spoken.

“Lao Wang!?” Xiao Zhan blurted and then slapped his hand on his mouth, frozen in terror.

Yibo recovered quickly and kept a poker face then on and prayed to all the gods that the chaos of the group conversation had somehow absorbed Xiao Zhan’s words and prevented him from being heard clearly. 

“Well, that was close,” Xiao Zhan smacked his forehead when the episode ended. “Sorry!” He sighed.

“I don't think anyone picked up on it,” Yibo shrugged and chuckled. 

“What was that line for!? So random!” Xiao Zhan questioned him, looking perplexed.

“They asked me to repeat a cheesy line Feng-ge said,” Yibo grinned sheepishly. 

“All your fans are gonna swoon at that one,” Xiao Zhan winked and teased.

“I don't care who else swoons…did you swoon?” Yibo threw his arms around Xiao Zhan’s neck and wiggled his eyebrows cheekily.

“Say it again,” Xiao Zhan feigned a serious face. “I’ll need to hear it once more to judge.”

“I might not be able to give you the whole world, but I can give you my entire world,” Yibo repeated, this time putting all his emotions behind the words.

Xiao Zhan was taken aback by the sincerity with which Yibo said it this time and couldn't help the fond smile that crept up on his face.

“I would be satisfied with even a small part of your world, Wang Yibo,” Xiao Zhan replied. “I would be satisfied with whatever you could give me, no matter how small. As long as it’s from you.”

“I wish you could be on those episodes with me the way the other couples sit together and attend too,” Yibo sighed suddenly.

“Ah, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan kissed his cheeks and hugged him close. “Just because we don't hold hands or kiss in public or can't call each other our partners in public doesn’t make us any less of a couple.”

“I know,” Yibo whispered. “But sometimes I wish we could just be in public as well.”

“Me too,” Xiao Zhan admitted. “But I’d rather protect what we have.”

“Oh, I almost forgot,” Yibo straightened up and let out a long exhale to shake off the emotions. “My manager texted, work is starting back up soon. I’ll have to go to Hengdian soon. I think at the end of this month.”

“Oh, guess our little quarantine heaven is coming to an end,” Xiao Zhan pouted.

“I’m gonna miss this,” Yibo rested against his chest again.

“It’s okay, didi. It’ll be okay. You’ll be busy with your work and I’ll be busy with all my projects soon too. It’ll be just like our normal routine again.”

“Mn,” Yibo tightened his arms around Xiao Zhan as a sudden inexplicable sense of dread crept in him. “It’ll be okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are officially at the end of Feb 2020 now.
> 
> Daily cloud time episodes (couldn't find the entire episodes subbed) (Yibo appears in the first 8 episodes only) -  
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpB25clmoEwRQOb_jztcDHCY5EOueMqs7
> 
> Random clips from this time period for your enjoyment -  
> https://twitter.com/BXG08051005_/status/1285462720888725506  
> https://twitter.com/joey_duli/status/1230497225848999938?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/joey_duli/status/1230516252742807552?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/SenoritaXX1/status/1230491661420990465?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/joey_duli/status/1230489800467087360?s=20
> 
> Wang Yibo cuts from the episodes -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xng-znzzcu8  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=plxuL6NUq2Q  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rph2GWOQdDg  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHjwHpzbA8g  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Brj5FdJ3j6c  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12-yVRwhjGI  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptoFTyq-AfU


	251. What's today's date?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter content warning: xiao zhan's ao3 scandal (otherwise known as: 227 scandal)
> 
> xiao zhan has graced us with a video on the first day of september - [video here](https://twitter.com/xiaozhvns/status/1300726413071273985?s=20) \- and as promised, when xz appears, a new chapter of ytty appears!
> 
> disclaimer reminder, although my story is based in the real world timeline and follows real world events, it is ultimately a work of fiction. please keep that in mind as we head down the road of march 2020 events. 
> 
> i have a few people to thank for being wonderfully helpful in gathering information on these events but i will not name them here just in case any haters decide to trouble them. but i appreciate all the help from them and the positive comments here and on twitter that keep me going. the next several chapters are hard for me to write. but we will get through this chunk together! 
> 
> jiayou, reader!

* * *

> _Yibo: Just boarding the flight  
>    
>  Yibo: I’ll call you from the hotel  
>    
>  Yibo: Already miss you  
>    
>  Yibo: _😘😘😘 

“Quick. What’s today’s date?” Yibo’s manager asked hurriedly as she was busy typing an email out on her phone.

Yibo checked his phone.

“February 29th, 8 am,” Yibo responded like a robot and then grinned when his manager rolled her eyes.

He shut his phone as they made the final boarding announcement for his flight and followed his team to the craft. 

When he landed at the airport two and a half hours later, his phone didn't turn on.

“Fuck! It must have died,” Yibo groaned. “Does anyone have a power bank?”

“Yeah, I’ll give you mine in the car and anyway, it’s only an hour’s drive to the hotel near Hengdian,” his manager spoke fast as they collected his bags. “Let’s go quickly before too many people notice you’re here and a crowd gathers.”

“Hmm,” he nodded and followed them to the car once the bags were collected.

He was going to be finishing the shooting for Legend of Fei finally in Hengdian. 

When they got to the car, Yibo connected his phone to the power bank immediately and waited for it to charge enough so he could turn it on. But before he could do that, he found his eyes growing heavy from having woken up early for the flight. He had managed to get some sleep in the flight but before he knew it, he had dozed off in the car again. 

An hour later, Yibo woke up to his bodyguard gently shaking him awake. He suppressed his yawns and followed the team into the hotel. As they rode the elevator up, Yibo turned his phone on and returned the power bank back to his manager.

No signal.

With a grunt, Yibo took his bag and took their leave to his room where he would be in self quarantine, alone, for the next 14 days. 

Inside the room, Yibo stretched and fell onto the bed. 

_14 days of this. Me, alone, in this room, doing nothing. It’s going to be so boring!_

Suddenly, his phone caught network once again and began buzzing with never ending notifications. Yibo startled and hastily grabbed his phone in an attempt to silence it. His eyes widened as notification after notification invaded his screen and overwhelmed the otherwise silent room. 

“What the-” Yibo struggled to keep up as his phone updated with the notifications from the entire time it had been shut off and without signal. 

Finally, when the pings stopped, he swiped down and began taking stock. 

There were missed calls and messages from several people including his TTXS brothers, UNIQ brothers, his parents, and finally Du Hua herself. Yibo’s mind boggled and he was about to open them one by one as the sense of dread he had felt a few days back returned, when he received an incoming call from his manager.

“Hello, yeah?”

“Have you seen the news yet?”

“What news? My phone just started working and I have a shit ton of messages and missed calls. What happ-”

“It’s Xiao Zhan.”

Yibo’s heart froze. 

“What do…what do you mean it’s Zhan-ge? What happened to him?” Yibo’s heart went from zero to a hundred at once.

“He…there’s a…” the manager fumbled.

“What happened?!!?” Yibo exclaimed.

“There’s been an incident. He-”

“Like an accident?! Is he okay? Is he in the hospital?!” Yibo stood up, now completely panicking.

“No! No no no,” the manager repeated urgently. “It’s not like that. He is at home, safe and sound. It’s just…there’s been an incident online and he’s receiving a lot of hate.”

“Oh,” Yibo relaxed and deflated as all the panic drained away. “You scared me, jie! What’s new about haters. He always has a group of them targeting him every now and then. We all do,” Yibo almost let out a relieved chuckle.

“Yibo…this is…different,” something in the manager’s voice made Yibo stop pacing and still, “this is…big.”

“I need to talk to Zhan-ge,” Yibo blurted just as the manager began attempting to elaborate.

“Oh…okay…yeah, sure.”

He ended the call and stared at his phone.

_Is that why everyone was contacting me?_

He swiped at the notifications and sure enough, most of them were either texts or voicemails, all along the lines of - _are you alright, is xiao zhan okay, we heard the news, so sorry for this bullshit, stay strong._ And all ending with - _Jiayou!_

Yibo felt himself grow heavy with dread again. 

_What the fuck is going on?_

He dialled Xiao Zhan’s number and waited. 

No one answered.

He dialled again.

Still no answer.

With a frustrated grunt, Yibo did the next best thing he could think of. He didn't want the sugar coated version from his manager. He went online.

As soon as he opened Weibo and searched for Xiao Zhan, Yibo gasped. 

He scrolled, kept scrolling, but it was all more of the same. There were several searches trending. And they all came down to one thing. 

People were hating on Xiao Zhan and his fans. A lot. 

“What the fuck happened!??!?!!?” Yibo roared in the empty room as he randomly clicked on one post.

He paused for a moment, torn between trying to call Xiao Zhan again and looking into whatever was going on for himself. 

After a moment’s thought, he dialled Xiao Zhan again. But once again, there was no answer. With an exasperated sigh, Yibo decided to go for the second option. He gathered his wits and readied himself for whatever he was about to learn.

_What’s going on? Why are they complaining so much about ge’s fanbase!? What’s fanfiction?_

As Yibo kept skimming, his eyes widened a little.

_There’s a…they’re…reporting a story someone wrote about ge and me?_

Yibo’s mouth dried. He opened the artwork that was made by a fan and read about the comments that people had left on it. He read about a lot of things people had said about the story itself and it was enough to give him an idea about what the story contained. He read about the outrage of people at the websites being banned and shut down. Yibo felt himself trembling. 

_But…at least most of the talk is about how people shouldn't be demanding censorship and freedom of speech,_ Yibo tried to rationalize. _Mostly, people are attacking XFX and their behaviour. It won't be the first time that a fanbase has reacted strongly leading to a whole issue. It will pass._

Yibo scrolled some more and sighed.

_Okay, so it’s mainly about freedom of speech, censorship, and this thing…fanfiction, whatever that is!_

He was about to breathe a sigh of relief when another search caught his eye. It wasn't high on the list just then but the words made Yibo clench.

_Boycott Xiao Zhan._

“What?!?!” Yibo exclaimed. 

His scowl deepened with every word.

_Why are they asking for Zhan-ge to be boycotted!??! He’s not even at fault or to blame?!?_

“This is such bullshit!” Yibo closed Weibo and frowned. 

He looked at his notifications once more and noticed a new message from Du Hua.

> _Du-mama: Yibo, I know by now you must have seen what’s going on  
>    
>  Du-mama: I want to make one thing very clear  
>    
>  Du-mama: Although I care very much about Xiao Zhan, I care about you more  
>    
>  Du-mama: So you are not to do or say anything about this incident to anyone  
>    
>  Du-mama: Not on Weibo or any other app  
>    
>  Du-mama: No posting, no commenting, not even liking any post in support of him  
>    
>  Du-mama: And the less you talk about this to people, the better  
>    
>  Du-mama: He is a big boy. He and his team can figure this out  
>    
>  Du-mama: Are we clear? _

Yibo looked at the message, puzzled. 

_Isn’t she overreacting a bit? She makes it sound like he’s in some kind of quicksand and I’ll get dragged under too if I speak up. But I guess this is part of the we-need-to-keep-distance-in-public charade we have to play anyway._

With a frustrated groan, he threw his phone aside and face planted into the bed.

“What bad timing!! Why did this have to happen just when I left home!?!?” Yibo screamed muffled sounds into the bed.

_At least it’s not that big an issue. It’s just the usual thing with fans overreacting and hyping up something. It will die down soon._

Yibo bit his lips nervously, repeating those words to himself over and over again. 

_It will die down soon._

He scrolled by a few more posts and his mind kept chanting.

_It will die down soon._

He decided to text Xiao Zhan.

> _Yibo: Call me when you can, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: Just saw the stupid shit online  
>    
>  Yibo: Don’t worry, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: It’s the usual drama that comes and goes _😘 

Yibo gulped and hoped that those words sounded as genuine as he wanted them to feel. But he wasn’t able to convince himself wholly. Nonetheless, he was sure that things would die down. They always did. 

_In a few days, something new is gonna catch their attention. That’s how this always goes. Everything will be fine in a few days._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also, new fic alert - [Yizhan Moments](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26233429)!  
> and new chapters updated in - [Life as we know it](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25812217).


	252. It's tricky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter content warning: xiao zhan's 227 scandal, mention of behind the scene character death
> 
> disclaimer reminder, although my story is based in the real world timeline and follows real world events, it is ultimately a work of fiction. please keep that in mind as we head down the road of march 2020 events.
> 
> current date in story: feb 29, 2020
> 
> jiayou, reader!

* * *

“I don’t understand.”

“I know…it’s…tricky.”

“It’s not my fault.”

“It’s not.”

“Then what are we even doing!?” Xiao Zhan groaned again and let out a long sigh. 

The conversation was going in circles. He had shut his phone off due to the incessant calls he was getting from news outlets and media reporters. 

“We need to make a statement of some sort,” his manager looked at him through the video call on his laptop before resuming typing something on her phone. 

“But what are we supposed to say?!” Xiao Zhan looked at her, utterly perplexed. 

His manager sighed and sat back in her chair, at a loss for words herself. 

They sat in silence for a few minutes. 

“I really don't understand though,” Xiao Zhan spoke again, more to himself than to her. “It wasn't like I did anything. I…I’m so confused.”

After a few more seconds of silence, Xiao Zhan looked at his manager.

“You would think that with everything going on, because of the virus, that people would have more perspective and prioritize things.”

His manager smiled sympathetically. 

“I feel so bad,” he went on. “I feel responsible for somehow taking up the public and government’s time for dealing with this when every resource should be directed towards the relief efforts.”

“That’s it!” His manager suddenly perked up. 

“What?”

“That’s what our statement will be about. We will apologize for the unnecessary need to use public resources for handling this issue. And ask everyone to be more rational.”

Xiao Zhan mulled her words over in his mind and nodded.

“I need to speak to Yibo,” he muttered finally and said his goodbyes before ending the video call.

Then, he cautiously turned his phone on. Ignoring the dozens of missed calls and unread messages, he video called Yibo. As soon as the call rang, Yibo answered as if he had been clinging to the phone and waiting.

“Zhan-ge! Finally! I tried calling you.”

The knot in Xiao Zhan’s chest loosened a bit. 

“Hi,” he sighed and walked to the balcony.

“You look tired. Are you okay, sweetheart?” Yibo’s tone changed completely and Xiao Zhan’s chest loosened some more on hearing the soft concern. 

“I…I’m just confused,” Xiao Zhan let out a long exhale and leaned back against the balcony railing.

“I’m sorry I’m not there,” Yibo replied in an apologetic voice. 

“It’s not that big a deal,” Xiao Zhan mustered a smile on seeing Yibo’s pained expression. “My team is handling it.”

“You don't have to smile for me, ge,” Yibo stated quietly.

Xiao Zhan’s smile faded and he walked inside and made his way to their bedroom in silence.

“What is your team going to do?” Yibo asked once Xiao Zhan had settled into their bed.

“Issue an apology for using the government’s resources and asking the public to be more rational.”

“What the f-” Yibo began but paused on seeing the exasperation on his face. “I guess you’ll have to make some statement or the other eventually. So be it.”

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan nodded and curled into himself. “How was your flight? How’s the hotel?”

“It’s all fine…gonna be stuck here for fourteen days now.”

“Are you still gonna do your TTXS episodes?”

“Yeah, although I won't be able to do much for it like I could from the Yuehua office. And I don't even have a team to do hair and make up so I can look presentable on camera,” Yibo pouted.

Xiao Zhan couldn't help the grin that appeared on his face.

“But Wang Yibo always looks so handsome, even without make-up,” he countered with a line Yibo had said to him during the shoot of A-Ling. 

Yibo grinned back as he reminisced and silently celebrated his triumph at distracting Xiao Zhan.

“But no one can match Xiao Zhan’s natural youthfulness. So handsome, so beautiful, unbeatable, blinding-”

“Okay, shut up! Are we starting!?” Xiao Zhan barked a laugh. 

Yibo spent the next hour chatting about useless things and bantering with Xiao Zhan until his smile didn't seem as strained anymore. 

“Ge,” Yibo decided to finally ask the question he had been wanting to, now that Xiao Zhan seemed more relaxed, “did you see the…fan work?”

“You mean the artwork and fanfiction?” Xiao Zhan grinned in amusement.

“Mn…”

“I saw the artwork…and I read what the fanfiction was about,” Xiao Zhan shrugged.

“Are you mad at them?”

“What’s the point of me being mad at them? And what kind of an artist would I be if I didn't respect people’s creative freedom?”

“But now because of that, you’re going through-”

“Yibo,” Xiao Zhan sighed and interrupted him, “the problem is not that someone wrote a story about us or drew me a certain way. The problem is that other people thought it was their moral obligation and right to demand that work be taken down.”

“But why are people blaming you!? It’s not like you asked for those websites to be shut down!”

“I don’t know…” Xiao Zhan replied quietly and looked into the distance with another sigh. “I guess people just need to pin the blame on someone. Or maybe my antis are just using this as another excuse to bash me. Or maybe people think it’s part of a celebrity’s job to manage their fans.”

“That’s stupid!” Yibo snorted and rolled his eyes. “They’re all a bunch of morons.”

“Whatever the reason is, I can’t avoid it,” Xiao Zhan let out a resigned chuckle. “I’ll just have to wait it out.”

“Don’t worry, ge!” Yibo rushed to placate Xiao Zhan who was now visibly low again. “It’ll be over in some time. Soon, the next hot mess will happen and everyone will run to attack that.” 

“Alright,” Xiao Zhan yawned. “I need to finish reading this script before bed.”

“Is this the one you’re really excited about?”

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan nodded with a wider smile. “I hope it works out, it’s really fascinating. I’ll tell you more when I’m done tomorrow!”

“Okay,” Yibo smiled fondly on seeing Xiao Zhan’s enthusiasm back. “You can tell me all about it tomorrow, my cute bunny.”

“What are you going to do now?” Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes and giggled at the pet name.

“Play some games…maybe build some legos. It’s a good thing I brought some along!” Yibo rolled his eyes.

“Bo-di…it’s only the first day of your self quarantine. Pace your frustration,” Xiao Zhan giggled. 

Yibo huffed and poked his tongue out at Xiao Zhan, making him giggle harder.

“Okay, I’ll talk to you later. Love you,” Xiao Zhan blew a flying kiss into the camera.

“I love you more,” Yibo pretended to catch the kiss and placed it on his cheek.

“Not possible,” Xiao Zhan shook his head and smiled brightly.

Just as he ended the call and was about to put his phone aside, he noticed a text from Long Danni.

_What does she want now!?_ Xiao Zhan was taken aback. _Does she just want to remind me that she is still my boss despite me having a studio?! Does she want to gloat!?_

> _Long Danni: I approved the message your studio is going to put out  
>    
>  Long Danni: Although I find it interesting that, in all this, not once has Wang Yibo’s name been dragged through the mud  
>    
>  Long Danni: Isn’t it interesting? _

Xiao Zhan stilled for a moment as his brain wrapped itself around her words. He had been so caught up in handling his own affairs that it hadn't occurred to him to see if this had affected Yibo, although nothing had popped up when he had scrolled through everything online himself earlier. He hurriedly typed a few more searches with Yibo’s name included and to his immense relief, nothing showed up. 

His brain went back to Long Danni’s words.

_Isn’t it interesting?_

> _Xiao Zhan: What do you mean?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Don’t even try to drag Yibo into this!  
>    
>  Long Danni: I would never.  
>    
>  Long Danni: Like you said, a small company like Wajijiwa can’t do much against a bigger, more influential company like Yuehua _

Something in her words irked Xiao Zhan. He thought there was more to what she was trying to say and was about to ask her what she meant when he received a call. It was his mother. 

Xiao Zhan took a deep breath, preparing himself to put on a steady, brave voice for his parents. He had texted them about the ongoing issue to forewarn them, saying he would call later. 

_Guess they couldn't wait any longer. I won't let them worry. Need to put a smile on my face so they know it’s not that bad!_

Xiao Zhan answered the phone call and spoke as cheerfully as he could manage to.

“Hi mama! Sorry I was going to call but-”

“It’s me, son,” Xiao Zhan’s father spoke in a deep, grave voice. 

“Oh, hi papa!”

“We have some bad news,” his father skipped over any form of greeting. 

“Wha-what happened? Is mama okay!?” Xiao Zhan sat up straight on his bed.

“It’s your mother’s father…you know he’s been sick for a while…”

“What…what happened to grandpa?” 

“Xiao Zhan,” his father’s voice cracked with emotion, “your grandpa…he’s no more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also, new chapters have been posted for - [Yizhan Moments](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26233429) and [Life as we know it](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25812217).


	253. I know you're hurting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter content warning: xiao zhan's 227 scandal, grieving loss
> 
> to address the comments: yes, apparently a friend of xz posted that his grandfather passed away during this time. there was no confirmation from xz or xz studio. i will share links i have used as resources at the end of a few more chapters.
> 
> disclaimer reminder, although my story is based in the real world timeline and follows real world events, it is ultimately a work of fiction. please keep that in mind as we head down the road of march 2020 events.
> 
> current date in story: mar 1, 2020
> 
> jiayou, reader!

* * *

Yibo woke up to his phone ringing. He looked at the caller id. It was an unknown number.

“God, I hope my number isn't leaked again!” Yibo mumbled groggily as he ignored the call. 

A few seconds later, his phone rang again. And again. And again.

On the fourth call, Yibo gave in and answered. 

“Wei?”

“Yibo?” A woman’s voice spoke. “Sorry to disturb you. This is Xiao Zhan’s manager. I…I am trying to get in touch with him regarding posting the statement to the studio Weibo but I haven't been able to get a hold of him. Have you spoken with him yet?”

Yibo barely caught half her words in his sleepy state. He looked at the time.

11:13 am.

 _Zhan-ge doesn’t wake up so late usually._ He wondered. 

“Maybe he was on another call…or away from his phone…”

“I’ve been trying him for two hours.”

“Oh…” Yibo shook the fog of sleep away and sat up. “I just woke up…I’ll try calling him.”

“Okay…please tell him to call me back.”

“Mn.”

 _No good morning message from him either._ Yibo noticed after he ended the call. With another yawn, he rubbed his eyes and dialed Xiao Zhan’s number. After what seemed like an eternity, Xiao Zhan answered the call.

“Ge?” Yibo spoke when Xiao Zhan didn't say anything when answering the call. 

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan replied in what was barely over a breathy hum.

“Go-goodmorning, ge,” Yibo felt confused. “Did I disturb you? Were you still sleeping?”

“Hmm…”

“Oh…sorry…your manager called me…said she’s been trying to get in touch with you about posting the statement.”

There was no response.

“Ge?” Yibo was now wide awake and utterly lost. “What happened?”

“I need to sleep,” Xiao Zhan spoke using words at long last but his voice was dead and distant. 

“Oh…umm…okay,” Yibo mumbled. “Umm…take some rest. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Hmm.”

And with that the call ended.

 _He must be really sleepy. But something felt off._ Yibo frowned. 

He browsed through the messages from his manager. He raised his eyebrows when she mentioned that the dates for posting his ads for his Safeguard, Colgate, and Swarovski endorsements had been moved up but shrugged and kept scrolling. 

He went back and forth between wanting to call Xiao Zhan again and something nagged at him but he couldn't put a finger on it. He opened the chat with Xiao Zhan and his fingers hovered over the keypad, struggling with the decision of what to text. 

Just then, his phone lit up with a call from Xiao Zhan’s father. 

“Hello,” Yibo answered immediately despite his bewilderment at the sudden unexpected call. 

“Hello Yibo,” a tired voice replied. “Sorry to disturb you, son, but have you spoken to Zhan-Zhan yet?”

_Why is everyone calling me about Zhan-ge suddenly!?_

“Umm…not really,” Yibo bit his lips, “he said he needed to sleep some more. Is everything okay?”

There was a long sigh at the other end of the line and Yibo waited. 

“I was worried this would happen. He’s all alone there…and with everything else going wrong…and now this unfortunate-”

“What happened?” Yibo’s heart began racing.

“His grandfather passed away last night,” Xiao Zhan’s father replied quietly.

Yibo felt like the ground had slipped from under him. He froze and his brain repeated the words over and over again as if unable to understand their meaning.

“Yibo? Hello?”

“So-sorry, I’m here…does ge know?” Yibo asked with bated breath. 

“Yes…and now he isn't answering our calls…we just want to make sure…he’s okay…” the man broke down into soft sobs. “His mother wants to hear his voice.”

“I’ll call him, papa…I’ll check on him…don’t worry.”

After they had ended the call, Yibo held his phone with shaky hands as he tried calling Xiao Zhan. Once again, he answered on the last ring. 

“Hmm?” Was all Xiao Zhan said. 

“Ge…I know…” Yibo’s voice trembled. “I’m sorry, sweetheart…I’m so so sorry…I know how close you were to him. I am so sorry for your loss, sweetheart.”

There was silence at the other end of the line. 

“You don't have to talk to me if you don't want to yet. It’s okay,” Yibo spoke in a soft voice. “Just know I’m here…I am here, ge…I will stay on the phone with you the whole time…you don't have to say anything. I’ll tell them you’re okay.”

He heard muted sobbing at the other end of the line. 

“You don't have to be strong for me. I’ll let them know you’re fine and you don't have to pretend in front of them,” Yibo continued as tears began rolling down his cheek.

The sobs grew more audible as he heard Xiao Zhan sniffle. 

“I know you’re hurting, baobao,” Yibo went on as he wiped his own eyes. “I love you.”

“I couldn't be with him,” Xiao Zhan’s meek, empty shell of a voice finally spoke.

 _And I couldn't be with you._ Yibo thought bitterly. 

“He knows how much you loved him,” Yibo let out a silent gasp of relief on hearing Xiao Zhan’s voice. “He knew, baobao. Trust me.”

“Mama must be hurting so much,” Xiao Zhan sounded almost disappointed in himself. “I should be consoling her.”

“And you will. In just a little bit. Once you feel better. Until then, I’m here for you. Always.”

Xiao Zhan broke down into sobs and every sound of him weeping cut through Yibo’s heart like daggers. He sounded so forlorn, so broken, so alone. Suddenly, Yibo felt every meter of the distance between them. 

Suddenly, he felt a fear creep up on him.

_What if something happened to Zhan-ge. Then I won't be able to be by his side either. I’d be stuck here. Helpless._

He shook the morbid thoughts out of his head and turned his attention back to Xiao Zhan who was still crying. 

He waited patiently as he had promised and stayed on the line. Seconds turned into minutes and Xiao Zhan’s sobs slowly began fading into gentle sniffles.

“Yibo…” Xiao Zhan spoke at long last. 

“I’m right here, sweetheart…” 

“I’m gonna miss him…”

“I don’t know what to say, ge…I’m so sorry for your loss,” Yibo replied desperately.

“This is enough,” Xiao Zhan took a long sigh and said. “You…being on the phone…waiting for me…this is enough.” 

“Okay,” Yibo sighed in relief as well. “I’m glad. But there is one thing my mom says about loved ones leaving us.”

“What’s that?”

“People we love never truly leave. They leave a part of them behind with us in our memories, in our hearts, in our lives. No one can erase that. No one can take that away even when the person has gone.”

“That’s beautiful,” Xiao Zhan’s voice quivered, “and…reassuring. Thanks.”

“Always, ge.” Yibo leaned back and held the phone close as if hugging Xiao Zhan himself. “Always.”

“I think I’m ready to talk to them…and my manager.”

“You don’t have to deal with the hate stuff right now, ge…it’s not that important.”

“It’s part of my job. And my family always taught me to be a professional,” Xiao Zhan let out a long exhale and Yibo could hear him finally getting up and out of bed.

“Call me whenever you need, okay?” Yibo relented.

“Mn,” Xiao Zhan replied and he can hear him pad his way somewhere.

“I love you…and I am so sorry, ge.”

“I love you too,” Xiao Zhan spoke softly, almost a whisper. “I wish…”

“Me too, I wish I was there too,” Yibo replied with a lot of regret and longing. 

_Two months is a long time to be without you anyway, ge. And add your loss on top of that, it just…it’s so unbearable!_ Yibo grew dejected. 

“I’ll keep the call now,” Xiao Zhan said reluctantly. “I should…I should call them.”

“Okay…and don't forget…I’m right here if you need to talk or message. Just let me know what you need.”

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan sounded quietly. “I love you.”

“I love you too, sweetheart. Always and forever.”

Yibo found it exceptionally hard to get through the day but a few hours later he received a text from Xiao Zhan’s father.

> _Papa: Thank you  
>    
>  Yibo: You don’t need to thank me, papa  
>    
>  Papa: I’m so glad he has you _

The worry in Yibo’s core loosened just a tad on seeing the message. But by the time it was evening, he began getting restless again on receiving no message from Xiao Zhan. 

_He just needs time. He’s dealing with a lot._ Yibo reminded himself. _And I can't even be there!_

He looked around the hotel room, disgruntled and upset. Even though work had resumed, there were still several restrictions in place due to the pandemic. Things had gotten worse globally and China was doing their best to recover from the blow. He along with the rest of the crew and staff were to be in self quarantine for two weeks. 

And this was just his second day. 

A knock on the door drew him out of his thoughts. The hotel staff was there to drop off his dinner meal. He thanked them and unwrapped the food with disinterest. He took a bite but stopped mid chew. He had no appetite. 

Just then, his phone pinged. 

> _Zhan-ge: It’s done. We’ve posted the apology.  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Hopefully this all just dies down soon now. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> three important announcements:
> 
> 1\. i've started a new twitter account (rip me) - [@yizhanmood](https://twitter.com/yizhanmood) \- where i write short soft musings about things i imagine yizhan do, follow me if you like such content!
> 
> 2\. the fic - [life as we know it](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25812217) \- is now complete!
> 
> 3\. a new chapter is up for - [yizhan moments](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26233429) \- about the behind the scenes of yizhan recording wuji (and holding hands).


	254. A rabbit hole of hate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter content warning: xiao zhan's 227 scandal, cyber bullying
> 
> disclaimer reminder, although my story is based in the real world timeline and follows real world events, it is ultimately a work of fiction. please keep that in mind as we head down the road of march 2020 events.
> 
> current date in story: mar 2, 2020
> 
> jiayou, reader!

* * *

Xiao Zhan had barely gotten any sleep all night. After posting the apology to his studio’s Weibo, his manager had told him to stay off social media for a while. Which he had. But he had stayed up with memories of his family and time with his grandfather growing up. He was in conflict. He was debating whether he should fly to Chongqing or not. One part of him wanted to be present for the final farewell but another part of him didn't want to be a burden to the family by attracting any unwanted attention. 

When morning came, he was leaning towards flying home to be with his family in this time of need. He could self quarantine in Chongqing. It was the better alternative than being alone in Beijing for two months without Yibo. It wouldn't interfere with his work since covid had slowed things down anyway on his new projects. He got up with a sigh and stretched out the kinks. As he twisted and turned, his eyes fell on his phone. 

This time, curiosity won. 

News circulated fast in the industry. There were private messages from many people within the industry, all positive and supportive, encouraging him to remain strong and optimistic and ride out the storm. Xiao Zhan’s heart warmed. 

He was also surprised. Somehow, the news of his grandfather’s passing had circulated among his friends including some of his close friends in the industry. In a way, he was relieved that he did not have to inform them. He guessed his team must have contacted his closest friends. He felt his eyes well up on seeing their loving messages and condolences. 

His Weibo was flooded with notifications. 

His public account was filled with opinions. Lots and lots of opinions on the studio’s apology post. There was a deluge of support with fans asking other fans to be rational and to not blame Xiao Zhan for something that wasn't in his control. But there was a lot more hate. More than he had ever seen in his career thus far. The volume of notifications and posts were mind boggling. And soon, Xiao Zhan found himself falling down a rabbit hole of hate.

_‘Has your internet collapsed, Xiao Zhan? Why not make a statement yourself?!’_

_‘You apologize for using public resources yet you are on so many hot searches. Shame!!’_

_‘Why so silent, Xiao Zhan? Hiding behind your fans and studio?!?’_

_‘Why such a late response?!?! It is not enough!!’_

_‘You call this a statement? It is rubbish. It doesn’t talk about anything real and major!!’_

_‘You used to be a real person. Fame has changed you Zhan-Zhan!’_

_‘Are fans your bullets or shield!? Hiding behind them, letting them take the blame! Such bullshit!’_

_‘Idols are supposed to set good examples! Shame on you!’_

_‘Where is your so-called good character!? Say something Xiao Zhan!!’_

_‘Using your family as an excuse to appear helpless?!?! Such a disgusting human being.’_

“What?” Xiao Zhan stopped breathing. 

He clicked on the last post and read further before letting out a silent breathless gasp. 

“Who-who…how did they…know about grandpa!??!!?” Xiao Zhan exclaimed. 

In the heated debate in the post’s comments, Xiao Zhan saw a screenshot of a post made by another account. An account he knew.

_Wang Jingli!? He posted about my family’s personal matter!? Without asking my permission!?_

Xiao Zhan felt hot tears and rage build up and he went to his friend’s Weibo and sure enough, there was the post. Without thinking, and with trembling hands, Xiao Zhan texted Wang Jingli and tried to regain his composure as he waited for his reply. 

He refreshed Weibo when he saw that his message had been read and a few seconds later, the Weibo post on his friend’s account was gone. His phone pinged soon after.

> _Wang Jingli: I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you!  
>    
>  Wang Jingli: That’s the last thing I want to do right now!  
>    
>  Wang Jingli: I just got so angry seeing the hate, I just wanted to tell them to back off  
>    
>  Wang Jingli: I am so so so sorry _

Xiao Zhan gathered all his decency and patience and wrote back.

> _Xiao Zhan: It’s alright. I appreciate the sentiment  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Thank you for deleting the post  
>    
>  Wang Jingli: Of course, not a problem!  
>    
>  Wang Jingli: How are you doing? I am so sorry for your loss. _

Xiao Zhan huffed and threw his phone aside and fell back on the bed, tears flowing freely. 

When he had settled down once more, Xiao Zhan picked up his phone with the intention of booking flight tickets to Chongqing. He wiped his eyes till they burnt and by the time he could see clearly enough to use his phone, there was an incoming call from his manager. 

“Hello?” Xiao Zhan spoke in a thick voice, hoping it would mask his current state. 

“Laoban,” his manager began in a very hesitant voice. “There’s been a…we have a problem.”

“I know…I saw Weibo…I’ve seen the…comments.”

“Oh…you shouldn't have,” she replied in a displeased tone and then sighed. “But that makes my job easier. With the momentum of the boycott campaign, I guess we-”

“Wait, what?”

“What?”

“Momentum of what campaign?”

“I thought you said you saw Weibo?”

“Yeah, I saw the comments on our studio apology and some other stuff, but nothing about the boycott campaign…what-”

“There’s a boycott Xiao Zhan campaign that’s been trending,” his manager replied bluntly, maintaining as neutral a tone as she could muster. “It has a ridiculous amount of views and posts…in the hundreds of millions…and it’s…starting to make a difference.”

“What kind of difference?” Xiao Zhan pressed his forehead, trying to keep up with the barrage of information coming his way.

“Well…” she took a deep inhale and began, “It’s…Olay and Crest…they’re-”

“They’re dropping me?”

“No, no brand has yet come forward to drop you,” she tried to reassure him, “but they are going to take down your photos and ads for now to try and dissipate the attacks on them.”

“Okay…I…understand,” Xiao Zhan replied in a small voice.

“People are lowering the ratings of your work on Douban…the Untamed ratings have dropped as a result as well,” she went on.

“Okay…” Xiao Zhan felt a stab of pain in his gut.

"And some of the projects you were looking at, aren't on the table any more..."

"What about the one I really liked?" Xiao Zhan held his breath.

"It's been postponed...indefinitely...is what they said but I think that they might be...looking for someone else..."

"Okay..." Xiao Zhan swallowed the lump in his throat.

“And people are demanding that you…” here she hesitated.

“That I what?”

“That you be blacklisted from the industry.”

“Oh…okay…” Xiao Zhan stilled as he felt gooseflesh suddenly trail all over his neck and arms. 

There was silence on the line for a few seconds.

“Laoban?” The woman called out gently.

“I’m here. I have two questions,” Xiao Zhan sat up and cleared his throat.

“Sure…what are they?”

“Do you think it’s a good idea for me to fly to Chongqing for my grandfather’s funeral given…all this?”

“I will be honest with you. As much as it pains me to say this…no. I don't think it will be wise. It might bring unwanted attention to your family as well.”

“Mn, that’s what I thought. And my other question…take your time to answer this and be honest for this too.”

“Okay…”

“It’s not so much a question as a gentle reminder. I will completely and totally understand if you or any member of the studio team wishes to resign right now. None of you will be under any contractual obligations from my end if you wish to resign under these circumstances.”

There was silence again. 

“Did you hear me?” Xiao Zhan checked in. “I’m just saying I would understand-”

“No one is resigning, laobaon,” the woman’s voice seemed shaky yet resolute. “We are all in this together.”

“I appreciate the sentiment, jie, but-”

“But we are a team…a family,” her voice was definitely trembling this time, “and family doesn’t abandon one another in times of need.” 

Xiao Zhan closed his eyes and let his tears fall again. He regained his composure in a few seconds and swallowed his emotions before whispering.

“Okay…okay, jie. Thank you.”

When he ended the call, Xiao Zhan curled up in the bed and pulled the blanket over him. He was not ready for the day. He was not ready for anything. But at least he was not alone.His mind immediately conjured up an image of Yibo. 

_Yibo. I miss you._

As if reading his mind, his phone lit up with an incoming video call from his boyfriend.

“Hey…” Xiao Zhan whispered when he answered the call, still laying tucked inside the comforter.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Yibo mustered a smile. “Are you still sleeping?”

“No, just…didn’t feel like getting out of bed.”

Yibo blew him an air kiss and smiled considerately as Xiao Zhan adjusted himself and the phone in his hand. Xiao Zhan wanted to crawl through the phone and straight into Yibo’s arms. He wanted to feel his warm embrace. He wanted to forget everything else.

“What have you been upto?” Yibo asked softly, laying down with the phone so it felt like they were side by side.

“Talking to my manager…about everything.”

“What did she say?”

Xiao Zhan let out a bitter chuckle before replying. 

“So it looks like I might need another career change again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also, i've started a new twitter account - [@yizhanmood](https://twitter.com/yizhanmood) \- where i write short soft musings about things i imagine yizhan do, follow me if you like such content!


	255. It's just business

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter content warning: xiao zhan's 227 scandal, homophobia, cyber bullying
> 
> disclaimer reminder, although my story is based in the real world timeline and follows real world events, it is ultimately a work of fiction. please keep that in mind as we head down the road of march 2020 events.
> 
> current date in story: mar 2, 2020
> 
> jiayou, reader!

* * *

An hour later when Yibo ended the call, Xiao Zhan didn't seem any better but at least he had been able to talk his heart out to him. Although Yibo had been scared at the beginning on hearing the way Xiao Zhan felt helpless about the circumstances, he realized the bigger issue plaguing him was how this would affect his family and his staff. 

_Typical Zhan-ge._ Yibo shook his head and sighed. 

He stretched and twisted his body, trying to shake off the lethargy that came with being cooped up in a room endlessly. He still had a long way to go before his self quarantine ended. A notification on his phone for a message from his manager reminded him that he was supposed to post his endorsement posts on Weibo. 

_What was it today? Safeguard? Colgate? Swarovski?_ Yibo groaned. 

He checked her instructions and prepared the post for Safeguard.

_This just feels so wrong. Posting like everything in the world is normal. Like we aren’t fighting against a major pandemic. Like Zhan-ge isn't going through a hate fest online and a personal loss in his life. If people knew we were together, they wouldn't expect me to- wait, what if this makes people think we aren’t together? What if this confirms it?_

Yibo’s fingers stilled and he texted his manager instead.

> _Yibo: Can we not wait a little longer to start posting work stuff?  
>    
>  Yibo: It just…doesn’t feel right with everything going on _

He was about to put the phone aside when his manager’s immediate reply caught his eye. 

_What does she mean it’s a ‘direct order’ from Du-mama?!_

Yibo’s eyes boggled at her next words. 

_The right time to capitalize on this opportunity!?? What opportunity?!?!_

Yibo knotted his eyebrows and dialed her number.

“Hello…I don't understand,” Yibo began as soon as she answered. “What opportunity?”

“Yibo…all she meant was that we need to build on your rising popularity.”

“And?” Yibo waited. 

He heard his manager sigh.

“Yibo, it’s just business…”

“What is?”

“It’s strategic…to cement your popularity now that…”

“Now that?”

“There’s an opening to get ahead,” she said in a barely audible voice.

“What?!?!” Yibo stood up and spoke angrily. “Ahead of who? Zhan-ge? Is that what this _business_ is all about!? Taking advantage of someone else’s misfortune and poach-”

“No one is poaching anything from Xiao Zhan! He has been rejecting new offers for endorsements and it only makes sense for them to approach others. And as for you posting now, those are professional commitments you have already made and have to fulfil no matter what is going on.”

Yibo grit his teeth and clenched his hand around the phone. 

“I won’t do it,” Yibo spoke in a guttural tone and then ended the call, throwing his phone on the bed. 

* * *

Yibo’s fuming had subsided somewhat as he made progress on his latest lego endeavor. As he finished the small piece with one final placement, he got distracted by a phone call. 

_I don't care what they say. I don't care if it’s Du-mama herself. I’m not gonna-_

The phone rang again and this time, Yibo spared it a glance. 

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo exclaimed hurriedly as he answered the call. “Sorry…I thought it was-”

“Your manager?” Xiao Zhan’s tired voice spoke from the other end. 

“Uhh…yeah…how did you…” Yibo stuttered but then paused as realization struck. “She called you?!”

“Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan sighed and Yibo’s remaining anger vanished and was replaced with concern and helplessness.

_He sounds so defeated._

“Zhan-ge…I’m sorry…I didn't know they would call you. I promise I won’t do anything to hurt your career and-”

“Take the endorsements.”

“Wha-what?”

“Do your job, Bo-di…”

“But ge…I can’t…just pretend like everything is normal…it feels wrong…and-”

“It’s just being professional. This _is_ a business. I know you’re not doing this to hurt me.”

“But ge, it doesn’t feel right.” Yibo choked on his own voice. 

“I’m proud of you, didi,” Xiao Zhan spoke gently. “They told me all the brands lining up for you. You’ve worked hard and now you’re just reaping the benefits. The timing may be slightly off but I’m sure this has more to do with you than with me.”

“Ge…” Yibo felt his lips tremble. “I would feel like I’m…I don't know…it would feel like we’re not…”

Silence prevailed for several seconds.

“In the eyes of the public, we’re not. And it’s better that way.”

Yibo felt a sting in his heart and eyes. 

“You don’t mean that.”

“Right now…with the way things are unravelling…I do,” Xiao Zhan’s voice was firm. “And I am thankful that you are not being dragged into this. I am so thankful none of this is undermining you or your work. If I wasn't sure about us keeping our distance in public before, I am now. This is good, didi.”

“I would rather it did affect me if it meant I could show solidarity with you,” Yibo replied just as firmly. 

He heard a soft sigh at the other end. 

“Bo-di…I have asked all my friends and family to not engage with anyone on social media or say anything on my behalf. Don't make me ask you to…”

“To what?”

“Keep yourself away from me too. I don't want to have to ask that of you. So just…please don't do anything rash.”

“I won't, ge…I won't do anything to make this harder on you,” Yibo clutched his phone. 

“Okay…good…now go do your job and we’ll do a video call later, okay?”

“Mn,” Yibo gave in with an exhale and nodded. 

When Xiao Zhan ended the call without another word, Yibo texted his manager and then logged onto Weibo, mechanically preparing the ad and then posting it after a quick review. 

_It’s just business._ He reminded himself. _It’s just work. I have to be professional like Zhan-ge wanted._

* * *

Yibo stepped out of his shower, rubbing the towel on his wet hair. He pulled on a pair of shorts and hurriedly picked up his phone to see if Xiao Zhan was ready for their video call. He clicked through Weibo as he waited and soon realized that that was probably a bad idea. 

All he saw was more hate for Xiao Zhan. 

The 227 supertopic had gained more followers and was now flooded with messages such as _‘R.I.P. Xiao Zhan, she will be missed’_. 

Yibo’s eyes widened as he misunderstood the message at first. His heart nearly stopped.

But the more he saw the more he realized that this was their way of mocking the incident with the fanfic, the characterization of Xiao Zhan and hating on Xiao Zhan all at the same time. 

Some people even went as far as to post condolence messages for the character, for Xiao Zhan and for his career. 

He noticed some celebrities had come out in support of Xiao Zhan but had been flooded with hate themselves, some even forced to delete their posts later on or make their public accounts private afterwards.

_This is getting so out of hand._ Yibo thought helplessly. _This is so fucking messed up._

He read over all the messages of support and a tinge of bitter regret invaded his heart.

_That should have been me. I should be the one saying these words for Zhan-ge. I should be out there fighting for him too._

More hate posts popped up in the search each time he refreshed it. They were all over the place. 

_'Xiao Zhan secretly initiated the demand for the ban!'_

_'Xiao Zhan wants to distance himself from Chen Qing Ling because it’s BL!'_

_'Xiao Zhan supports the ban in private!'_

_'Xiao is homophobic!'_

_'Xiao Zhan is a puppet!'_

Then, a particular search caught his eye. The words made his stomach curl. Many variations of the same on so many posts.

_'Revealed! Xiao Zhan’s secret life!'_

_'Hidden secrets of superstar Xiao Zhan come to light!'_

_'Immoral idol!'_

_'How China’s it boy is in real life!'_

_'Exposed! Xiao Zhan is not as righteous as he claims to be!'_

Yibo opened a post with trembling hands, preparing himself for their secret to be tossed around like laundry in front of the whole of China. But to his initial relief and the consequent confusion and disgust, he found old photos of Xiao Zhan with his college friends and partners. People had dug through his old social media accounts and pulled up proof of all his past relationships with girls and also ‘exposed’ photos of him with his friends and called them his ‘boyfriends’. 

There seemed to be no end to the number of reasons to hate on Xiao Zhan according to the internet.

_What. The. Fuck._ Yibo froze. _They’re accusing Zhan-ge of everything under the sun!_

“THIS IS RIDICULOUS!” He screamed into his room. “NONE OF THIS MAKES ANY SENSE!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for sticking with this fic through these miserable chapters. i was so sure i would lose readers. there will be light soon at the end of this dark, long tunnel.


	256. Enough is enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XIAO ZHAN POSTED A PHOTO OF HIS CAT, JIANGUO, ON OASIS and as promised, when xz appears, so does a chap of ytty!
> 
> current date in story: mar 13, 2020
> 
> i cannot promise only light yet, but it won't be all dark any more.

* * *

Nothing made sense. Not to Xiao Zhan’s fans, not to Xiao Zhan’s team, not to Yibo and least of all to Xiao Zhan. Just like that, time kept passing him by. The whole world was moving ahead, slowly trying to get back onto its feet, but Xiao Zhan felt stuck in exactly the same place. 

> _  
> Bo-di: Just done shooting the TTXS episode, ge_
> 
> _Bo-di: Can’t believe I begin shooting in Hengdian studios tomorrow_
> 
> _Bo-di: It’ll feel weird being back in costume and hair and makeup_
> 
> _Bo-di: Want to video?  
>  _

Xiao Zhan stared at the message and then remembered his phone call with his manager. 

_‘Nothing yet, laoban. But there are some good offers for singing. And that might be the safest route for now.’_

She was right, Xiao Zhan knew that. It had been his decision to refuse any new endorsement ads since the boycott Xiao Zhan campaign was still running with full force and the 227 supertopic also didn't seem to be losing any momentum any time soon. He didn't want to jeopardize any brand with the backlash.

But it was at times like this that he wished he had some surety of what he would be doing a few months later, that he had some certainty with which he could say that he would have acting projects lined up once again. 

Singing was his first love but acting had become his true passion. And now, he found himself empty handed. The few projects that he had become excited about were now postponed indefinitely and many of the others had just gone with other actors. Not that Xiao Zhan blamed them. 

With a sigh, Xiao Zhan turned onto his stomach and hid his face in the pillow. Each and every day in the last two weeks had blended into one big blur. He couldn't tell day from night. Everything was one giant mess and Xiao Zhan felt helpless, like he had no control over his life any more. 

He recalled what a friend of his had told him over text when reaching out with words of encouragement and motivation.

_Work when you’re focussed, read when you’re puzzled, think when you’re alone, sleep when you’re sad._

So far Xiao Zhan had followed the last bit well enough. All he did was sleep and think and sleep and then think again. Yet nothing made sense. He had no sense of direction any more. And no sense of routine.

“Enough!! Aarrrghhhh!!!” Xiao Zhan suddenly screamed into the pillow and gripped it tightly. 

He sat up on the bed on his knees and let out a long, frustrated, desperate, angry, cleansing scream. He screamed with his entire body. He screamed loudly and freely. Just like he had when he had to get into the angst for Wei Wuxian. 

Several seconds later, when the silence settled around him and his throat and heart calmed down once more, he jumped off the bed. 

“Enough, Xiao Zhan.”

He picked up his phone and dialled his manager once again.

“Hello, yeah…I’ve made up my mind. Say yes to the red plum blossom song, and I want to release a new single, so let’s find me one. Also, I have another idea, I want to establish a Xiao Zhan fans charity project. This shit has gone on for too long. I know who my true fans are and I know that they are capable of good. I want to give them an official way to show their support for me. All these hot searches, super topics, popularity rankings, voting systems…it’s all bullshit. That is not how I want to be judged any more, and-”

“Woah woah, laoban, hold on…slow down,” his manager interjected his bullet train instructions. 

“Look,” Xiao Zhan paced his bedroom, eyebrows knitted, body tense, “I know it’s still too soon and I’m still-”

“No, no!” She rushed to correct him. ““Let me open my laptop and note these down!”

Xiao Zhan could hear the smile and eagerness in her voice. He let his shoulders relax in relief and sighed. 

“And laoban,” the older lady said after a pause, “it’s good to see you finally back on your feet. Everything else, we’ll figure out together.”

“There’s still gonna be hate…”

“There is.”

“Probably even more once I start putting out work again.”

“Probably.”

“Let’s do this.” 

* * *

When the call ended, Xiao Zhan felt several kilos lighter and his head felt more clear than it had in the last two weeks. The constant knot in his chest loosened and his breath finally made it all the way down to his core when he inhaled.

_I should call Yibo. He’s been so patient with me these few weeks, listening to me rant endlessly and cry and complain and sometimes shut him out. I’ve been so moody and lost in my own thoughts that I don't even know how things have been for him. And he’s gonna be busy with his shooting from tomorrow. I should make the most of this day._

Xiao Zhan decided to do something special for Yibo. Nothing big, a small special gesture - he wanted Yibo to see a happy, smiling Xiao Zhan before heading off to work again. He hopped into the shower after two days and scrubbed himself thoroughly until he was pink and fresh. He put on one of Yibo’s shirt and with one last look in the mirror, video called his boyfriend. 

“Zhan-ge! I was just about to-” Yibo greeted him but then paused mid sentence when he saw Xiao Zhan on his screen. 

Xiao Zhan smiled and waved at him as he sat in their porch swing just in time for the sunset. 

“About to?” Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow and waited for Yibo to go on.

“Call you…” Yibo mumbled. “You…you’re…not in bed.”

“I am not,” Xiao Zhan smiled. 

“You showered?”

“I did,” Xiao Zhan’s grin widened.

“And you’re smiling…a lot,” Yibo gasped. “Is everything okay, ge? What happened all of a sudden?”

“I just got sick of being sad and lost,” Xiao Zhan’s smile faltered but then flickered back to life. “I decided enough was enough. Granted that certain things are out of my control right now but I can still do some things and so…I did.”

“Ge…” Yibo’s eyes grew watery.

“Yibo! Are you crying??”

“You have no idea how happy it makes me to see you like this…after so long…I just…I’m so happy you’re feeling better slowly.”

“Aya gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan caressed Yibo’s face on the screen. “You must have been so worried for me. Why didn't you say something?”

“I didn't want to pressure you to feel better just for me. I knew you just needed time.”

“I love you,” Xiao Zhan blew a kiss at the phone.

“I love you too, baobao,” Yibo smiled and caught the kiss, placing it on his cheeks.

Xiao Zhan giggled and brought the phone to his lips, placing a loud kiss on Yibo’s face on the screen. 

“I miss you so fucking much,” Yibo sighed when Xiao Zhan’s face came back into view. “You look beautiful in this light,” he marvelled at the way Xiao Zhan’s face was lit up by the setting sun. 

“I miss you too, sweetie,” Xiao Zhan smiled shyly and looked at the face that was staring back at him, overflowing with love and gratitude. “I’ll weather this storm, Yibo. Don't worry so much. You need to focus on your work now…are you excited about returning to the Legend of Fei set?”

“Mn,” Yibo shrugged. “I’m excited to get out of this room. But I wish I could see you instead.”

“Few more weeks,” Xiao Zhan tried reassuring him. 

“SIX more weeks,” Yibo pointed out with a pout. 

Xiao Zhan chuckled and shook his head.

“Instead, I’ll have to see a bunch of old men and women in face masks and fling myself around in ropes and cords!”

“Yibo! Don't call them all old!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed but couldn't help laughing harder.

“And don't get me wrong, Liying-jie is amazing but she talks less than me even! It’s gonna be so boring!!” Yibo made a deeper pout and sulked.

Xiao Zhan couldn't handle the cuteness and laughed heartily at his childish complaints.

“It’s so good to finally hear your laugh, ge,” Yibo whispered suddenly. 

Xiao Zhan glanced at him on hearing the words and his laughter subsided when he saw how sincere and emotional Yibo looked. 

“It’s good to hear myself laugh too, didi,” Xiao Zhan touched his cheeks feeling the unfamiliar stretch of a smile after a long time. “I was starting to think I’d forgotten how.”

“I’ll never let you forget how to laugh, ge…” Yibo replied with so much passion in his voice that Xiao Zhan felt overwhelmed with emotions.

“Hmm,” he managed to say even as a warm tear slid down his cheek. 

“Even in this world, with all this hate, there is one person who still loves and trusts you unconditionally, ge.”

“Wow!” Xiao Zhan placed his hand on his chest dramatically. “Did you just go all Lan Wangji on me!?”

“It’s true though,” Yibo grinned sheepishly and Xiao Zhan felt a warmth spread across his chest.

“I know, sweetie…” Xiao Zhan leaned back in the swing and watched his beautiful boyfriend smile back at him as the final rays of daylight lit up the evening sky. “I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for all my zsww and lsfy enthusiasts, we may be hosting zsww/lsfy week in the future (once the bjyx week is done) and to get things rolling and start spreading the word, we created a twitter account - [@zswwlsfy_events](https://twitter.com/zswwlsfy_events%22). 
> 
> If you are a creator and might want to participate, please follow the twitter account and join the [ao3 collection](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/zsww_lsfy_week_2021/profile) (link also in twitter bio). You are not committed to anything by doing either! This is just to gauge interest! More info will follow later.
> 
> If you are a zsww/fan and want to keep track of the content coming out of this event, please follow us and bookmark the collection so you can see when we post the works!


	257. The more hate the world gives you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter content warning: talk of death and suicide topics in the hate storm

* * *

The next day, Yibo returned to the set with a lighter heart and a stronger determination and Xiao Zhan had made his return in the most Xiao Zhan way possible. He launched the Xiao Zhan fan charity project.

What was even more satisfying to Yibo was seeing Xiao Zhan creating again. He designed the logo for the charity project and even got it patented.

Xiao Zhan’s mood had visibly improved as he resumed his cooking, painting, reading and exercising. Although the hate was still swirling like a storm on the internet, they kept themselves cocooned in their little bubble as best they could.

Xiao Zhan had gone back to work. Even if it wasn't an acting project, it was still something dear to his heart. Yibo could tell how special and important this was to him. He recorded the song ‘Red Plum Blossom’ and even wrote an essay on his thoughts on it and his hometown Chongqing. 

_Red plum blossoms bloom on the red rocks_  
_Thousands of miles of ice and frost underfoot_  
_What is there to fear of the bitter cold after the Winter Solstice_  
_The loyal heart blooms toward the sun_

 _He has the fiercest, most loyal heart there. And he is my sun._ Yibo immediately lost himself in the words sung by Xiao Zhan’s heavenly voice in the rough cut he had shared with him. _He is singing this song to China but also to himself._

 _Red plum blossoms bloom_  
_Each blossom radiating_  
_Holding head up in full bloom_  
_The fragrance travels afar_  
_It awakens all flowers to bloom in unison_  
_Singing in celebration for the coming of spring, сoming of spring_

 _He is the national pride. No one better than him to do this._ Yibo smiled as he imagined Xiao Zhan motivating himself with these words. _And when he blooms again, the entire world will be enchanted by the fragrance once more. Slowly, Zhan-ge will show all his haters._

 _Red plum blossoms bloom on the red rocks_  
_Thousands of miles of ice and frost underfoot_  
_What is there to fear of the bitter cold after the Winter Solstice_  
_The loyal heart blooms toward the sun_

 _He certainly has the Chongqing spicy and stubborn spirit flowing in his veins. Never giving up, never backing down._ Yibo smiled wider when he thought over how much pain Xiao Zhan fought through without saying a word to anyone in public. _They don’t realize how much courage it takes to remain silent sometimes and let things pass._

 _Red plum blossoms bloom_  
_Each blossom radiating_  
_Holding head up in full bloom_  
_The fragrance travels afar_  
_It awakens all flowers to bloom in unison_  
_Singing in celebration for the coming of spring, сoming of spring_

 _Zhan-ge’s voice is beautiful._ Yibo felt his heart and eyes well up. _Everything about him is beautiful. How can someone so pure be hated. Why did all these bad things happen to him of all people!?_

> _Yibo: The song is beautiful, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: Your voice and singing just take it to another level  
>    
>  Yibo: This style suits you so well  
>    
>  Yibo: And the art for this…I can’t believe you made it, ge  
>    
>  Yibo: So talented!!!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Oh my god, enough with the rainbow farting, Bo-di!  
>    
>  Yibo: It’s all true! I mean it! That artwork is so…I don't have words for it, Zhan-ge!!  
>    
>  Yibo: This is gonna blow up when it’s released!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Aya enough! Stop!  
>    
>  Yibo: I love you _😘  
>    
> 

Yibo grinned as he imagined Xiao Zhan’s flustered face on being complimented.

_The more hate the world gives you, the more love I’ll give you, Zhan-ge._

* * *

Two more weeks passed them by and Yibo kept counting down the days till he would be back in Beijing.

 _Three weeks still to go_!!?? Yibo groaned when he checked his phone. 

He had gotten back to the hotel in the evening from his shooting in the Hengdian studio and had just come out of his shower. 

_I can't believe time is moving so slow right when I need it to move faster so I can be back home with Zhan-ge!!_ He grunted and fell back on the bed in his hotel room. 

> _Yibo: I wanna see your face  
>    
>  Yibo: Missing you a lot _

Yibo sighed and opened the menu to order some room service. He hadn't eaten lunch and was starving. 

_If Zhan-ge were here, he would scold me for not taking better care of myself._ Yibo huffed a smile as he picked out two dishes for dinner. 

After placing the order, he checked his texts but there was no reply from Xiao Zhan.

 _Has he gone to sleep? No, there isn't any goodnight message and we always talk before sleeping._ Yibo frowned but decided to wait some more. 

He played a few rounds of a video game until the food arrived and then ate it hungrily, eyes constantly glancing at his phone instead of paying attention to the race that he was watching on TV.

_Why hasn’t he replied?_

A sudden thought crossed Yibo’s mind.

_Did something more happen? Is he avoiding his phone again?_

Yibo put his chopsticks down and grabbed his phone, hurriedly opening Weibo. Hesitantly, he typed in Xiao Zhan’s name and clicked on the search bar. 

Something had happened again.

Hunan TV had posted a message directly in support of Xiao Zhan and the internet was blowing up over it. It seemed that the haters had come in renewed forces to criticize both Xiao Zhan and Hunan TV for coming out in support of him.

As had become the usual, the hate was all over the place. People hated for all kinds of reasons, sometimes contradicting each other as well. But everyone could agree on one thing - no one must support Xiao Zhan in the industry any more. 

Yibo knitted his eyebrows as he read some of the comments. Just when he thought he was getting used to the sheer level, volume, and intensity of hate against Xiao Zhan, he would be shocked all over again.

_Death threats?? There are people saying he shouldn't be seen again??_

Just then another post caught his eye. 

_A handful of people have threatened to commit suicide!!??? What the fuck??!! People are blaming Zhan-ge and saying it should be him instead?!!_

“What the fuck??!” Yibo exclaimed and shot up in shock as his eyes read the unbelievable words on his screen. “What is wrong with people!???”

Yibo shuddered at the morbid thoughts and images that the posts brought up inside him and shook them away immediately. 

“Fucking assholes,” he spat out and threw his phone down on the bed and sat down with a few more choice curses escaping his mouth as he scowled at the TV angrily. 

_Oh no._ Yibo suddenly realized. _Did Zhan-ge see all this? Is that why he isn’t responding to my texts!?_

“No, no!” Yibo picked up his phone hastily again. “He was getting to a better place and starting to finally be himself again!”

Yibo dialled and waited. There was no answer. He tried again and again and still no response. Yibo felt a chill run down his spine as the hateful words and wishes echoed in his mind. 

_I can't even imagine what it must be like to have other people’s death’s blame put on you._

Yibo began getting more nervous as time passed by with no reply or call back from Xiao Zhan.

_It’s been hours since I texted him! Maybe he really did fall asleep early today. Yeah, it’s past midnight now. He might have dozed off and now it’s too late._

Yibo tried consoling himself and settled down once again.

 _Please, Zhan-ge._ His brain couldn't help but add on. _Please be alright. I’m here for you. The more hate people throw at you, the more love I will give you. Just please be alright._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> xz fans charity project -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1241451102802833408?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1241424323690164224?s=20 
> 
> song of red plum xz version -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYobu2AkSWI
> 
> xz red plum artwork -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1248451523530510344?s=20
> 
> xz red plum and chongqing essay -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1250086917783207937?s=20
> 
> some of the sources for the xz 227 scandal (please be warned, it is very upsetting to read about all the backlash and hate) -  
> https://www.vox.com/2020/3/1/21159275/china-ao3-archive-of-our-own-banned-censorship  
> https://jingdaily.com/the-dark-side-of-chinas-idol-economies/#.XmYrpSsnSiM.twitter  
> https://contentcommerceinsider.com/blog/beauty-brands-face-chinas-cancel-culture  
> https://38jiejie.com/2020/03/03/xiao-zhan-continues-to-suffer-backlash-from-the-ao3-controversy/


	258. Why am I nervous?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> song i listened to on loop for this chapter: [Yisa Yu's 記恨](https://youtu.be/A-55okGvz4E?t=4%22)
> 
> note: the song's meaning and music video have nothing to do with this chap. it's more the music and melody that set the tone for this chap.  
> 

* * *

Xiao Zhan took a deep breath and adjusted the hood of his black jacket over his head. When the door opened, he stepped out of the car and with a few quick strides, he was inside the building.

_That wasn’t too bad. Barely anyone noticed me. They probably don't expect to see me out and about anywhere at this point._

He was followed by one bodyguard, the one who had helped him arrange all of this. When the elevator reached the right floor, he gave a grateful bow and walked to his destination. 

A few seconds later, he stood in front of a door, heart racing, and knocked. 

_Why am I nervous?!_

“Yes?” The door opened and a head poked out, a pair of eyes landing on him and then instantly flying wide open.

“Zhan-ge??” Yibo gasped in a low, confused voice as his face turned from indifference to recognition to utter bewilderment.

And just like that, Xiao Zhan felt like he could finally let out the breath he had been holding ever since he left their home in Beijing to fly to Hengdian.

Five weeks. It had been five weeks since he had seen Yibo. 

They had gone longer than that without seeing each other. But this time was different. This time had felt different. This time, the whole world had turned upside down in the time they had been apart. Or at least that’s what it felt like to Xiao Zhan. 

He felt like a whole different person.

“Yibo…” Xiao Zhan pulled his mask down and managed a breathy voice as he smiled in relief on seeing the face he still loved so much. 

Without another word, they stepped towards each other and engulfed each other with their arms. Xiao Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo and rested his head on his shoulders as Yibo encircled his waist. As soon as he felt Yibo’s warmth around him he felt all his muscles finally, finally, finally relax and let go of their burdens. He melted into the hug and let out a soft sigh as he buried his face in the crook of Yibo’s neck.

“We should go inside, baobao,” Yibo whispered and pulled Xiao Zhan closer, holding him tighter. 

“Mn,” Xiao Zhan nodded, still hiding in the curve of Yibo’s face, unwilling to part.

Yibo walked them in backwards and pushed the door gently shut once they were inside his hotel room. He held Xiao Zhan as close as was physically possible and sank his face into his collar, inhaling his scent.

Xiao Zhan pressed into Yibo further and nuzzled closer, both unsatisfied with the closeness despite being wrapped around each other like a vacuum seal. 

No words were said. No words were needed as they held each other and Xiao Zhan let himself be swayed slowly, gently from side to side as Yibo massaged the back of his head, cupped his neck, soothed his back, kissed his shoulder, hugged him harder with every comforting touch. 

And Xiao Zhan let himself be comforted. 

He let himself believe that he was safe. He let himself trust that everything was going to be alright. He let the caring touch of someone who loved him unconditionally ground him in the present. He let the tenderness radiating from Yibo wash over him and drench him to the bones until all he felt was happiness. He dug his fingers into Yibo’s back and held on for life as the tears began rolling out. 

“It’s okay, sweetheart,” Yibo murmured softly, “it’s okay…you’re okay.”

Yibo held him close and whispered the words as he planted feathery kisses on his cheek, ear, neck, collar and shoulder.

“You are so strong, baobao. So strong. You pushed through.”

Xiao Zhan shut his eyes harder and sobbed into Yibo’s shoulder.

“I’m here. I’m right here. It’s okay now.”

When they finally pulled apart, neither let go of the other. 

“Hey,” Yibo finally spoke again.

“Hi,” Xiao Zhan replied, a mix of emotions.

“You came,” Yibo cupped Xiao Zhan’s face.

“I came,” Xiao Zhan shrugged and kissed Yibo’s palm.

“I was so worried when you weren’t responding,” Yibo’s hands trembled a little. “I thought…I saw all the new shit and-”

“I’m sorry I worried you,” Xiao Zhan placed one hand over Yibo’s and rested their foreheads together. “I just…I wanted to see you…and thought it would be a nice surprise.”

“It is,” Yibo whispered. “The best.”

He closed the gap between their lips and pressed a soft kiss against Xiao Zhan’s mouth. His fingers curled behind Xiao Zhan’s head and got lost in his lush, wavy hair. He pulled him closer and kissed him again and again on the lips, thankful for having him in front of him. 

“I love you,” Yibo murmured against his lips and lavished the lips and Xiao Zhan’s mole with more kisses. “I love you so much and I’m so glad you’re here. I feel…”

He couldn't find the right words so he showed Xiao Zhan instead. He leaned in and enveloped his lips with his and this time kissed him deeper. He could feel Xiao Zhan relaxing under his touch and took his time kissing him until he could feel him calming down finally. 

This time, when they pulled apart, Xiao Zhan’s smile was brighter and reached his eyes. 

“I needed that,” Xiao Zhan sighed and embraced Yibo again.

“Come on,” Yibo led him in by the hand, “let’s get you settled in so you can tell me how the hell you managed to pull this off!”

“It wasn’t too hard actually. Yanyan helped.” Xiao Zhan grinned. “It’s a good thing our staff members have become good friends.” 

“Oh,” Yibo raised his eyebrows in surprise as he sat down on the bed, pulling Xiao Zhan down with him. “I didn't know they were. I should take advantage of that too,” he smirked.

They chuckled and Xiao Zhan settled into the bed tucked into Yibo’s side as they lay together.

“I missed this,” Xiao Zhan spoke after a while and cuddled Yibo closer.

“I missed this too,” Yibo kissed Xiao Zhan’s forehead. “Ge…” Yibo hesitated.

“Hmm?” 

“Han-ge said Hunan TV will take down their message of support for you.”

“I expected as much. It’s okay…I don't want them getting any unnecessary hate.”

“And…umm…did you see the threats?”

“Yeah.”

“And you still came?”

Xiao Zhan raised his head and partially sat up on his elbow and looked at Yibo.

“Are you implying I shouldn't have come?”

“No! No!” Yibo sat up hurriedly and clutched Xiao Zhan’s hand. “I am so happy you are here. But it’s probably not safe-”

“You think I don't know that?” There was a tinge of irritation in Xiao Zhan’s tone. 

Yibo sighed and dropped his head.

“I know, baobao,” he spoke soothingly. “I just…I’m just worried.”

“I did everything right,” Xiao Zhan sat up completely and looked at his hands as he clutched harder onto Yibo’s. 

“Huh?”

“I’ve been thinking a lot. And I did everything they told me to. I did everything everyone wanted me to. Even when it was hard for me. And I never…hurt anyone…intentionally at least,” his voice broke. “And still…this happened…to me.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” Yibo sat beside Xiao Zhan and placed a kiss on his temple, holding his hand firmly in his. 

“So now,” Xiao Zhan took in a deep breath and wiped his tears with his other hand, “I’ve decided to not care as much about what others think.”

Yibo stilled and he observed Xiao Zhan’s face carefully, trying to decipher his expression. There was no bitterness or vengeance, neither was there resignation or surrender. It was just filled with determination and certainty. 

“Good,” he smiled and brought Xiao Zhan’s hand to his lips to place a kiss on it. 

“I’m gonna do what I want…and I wanted to come see my fiance.”

“Your fiance is a very lucky man,” Yibo smiled and entwined their fingers together.

“I’ve also made another decision,” Xiao Zhan spoke with a firm tone.

“What’s that?” Yibo asked, a little warily.

“I don't want us to hide as much any more…”

“What?” Yibo froze. 

“I’m saying…I am okay with being an open secret in the industry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rumor - xz visited wyb in hengdian on april 8th and there's a video of him (apparently) entering his hotel building
> 
> also, i started a new fic (another kidfic sorry lol) for the bjyx prompt fest - ['love thy neighbor'](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26408098) \- where xz is a single dad and moves in next door to wyb!


	259. Whatever you want

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XIAO ZHAN NEW DRAMA ANNOUNCED AND TRAILER RELEASED AND SO OF COURSE I HAVE TO POST YTTY!!!
> 
> xiao zhan cut -   
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhvns/status/1305384205220601857?s=20
> 
> full trailer -  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1305420204579708929?s=20
> 
> more info -  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1305367970571603969?s=20

* * *

“What?”

“You heard me right,” Xiao Zhan placed a finger on Yibo’s chin and smiled. 

“Ge…do you…what…where is this…suddenly coming from?”

“I was thinking about a lot of things since…” Xiao Zhan sighed and looked at their joined hands. “And I realized something.”

“What?”

“We starred in a bl drama together.”

“Did you just realize that, ge?” Yibo smirked and Xiao Zhan bared his teeth playfully and smacked him on the arm.

“No! What I mean is…” Xiao Zhan pinched Yibo’s nose, “in this industry…that means we may never work together again.”

“Oh…” Yibo’s face dropped. “That’s not necessa-”

“Maybe, maybe not…but we know how our last public appearance went,” Xiao Zhan gave Yibo a knowing look. 

Yibo bit his lips as he remembered Weibo night and the instructions they were given. 

“And there’s a good chance, that it’s unlikely we’ll be allowed to appear together or be near each other at any public event for a long time.”

“But eventually, enough time will pass-”

“Yeah, but until then what? We just don't see each other unless we’re at home?” Xiao Zhan huffed a sarcastic laugh. 

“Are you breaking up with me?!?” Yibo looked at Xiao Zhan in utter bewilderment.

“Yibo!!” Xiao Zhan smacked his forehead and exclaimed. “Stop being silly!”

Xiao Zhan pulled him close by the collar and kissed him. 

“That is not an option. That will never be an option. Understood?” Xiao Zhan looked at him square in the eyes and raised an eyebrow.

“Okay,” Yibo nodded and grinned sheepishly.

“Your year is already booked. You have Street Dance coming up right after you finish here with the Legend of Fei. Then you’re going to get back to Being a Hero and end the year with Luoyang, right?”

Yibo nodded again.

“But I’ll make time, ge…” he argued.

“And you have your appearance on the…surf show…”

Both hesitated for a second as Xiao Zhan stated that fact. Yibo felt a sudden discomfort as he remembered how Xiao Zhan had also been invited for the show but now, that plan had fallen through, just like many other work plans had for Xiao Zhan. 

“Hey,” Xiao Zhan cupped Yibo’s cheek and spoke softly, “it’s okay. I don't feel bad about it. They did what they had to do.”

“I…I-”

“Don't say your sorry,” Xiao Zhan kissed him gently, “this has nothing to do with you. It’s just business, remember?”

“Mn,” Yibo flattened his lips and said nothing more.

“Anyway and you also have TTXS to keep up,” Xiao Zhan continued.

“You’ll get back to work in full force soon too, ge,” Yibo clutched Xiao Zhan’s hand desperately.

“I know, didi…it’ll take time but that’s not why I’m-”

“And until then, I promise I won't let my work get in the way of us spending time together. I’ll make sure to make time-”

“Yibo,” Xiao Zhan clamped Yibo’s mouth shut, “listen to me. It’s okay. You don't have to take responsibility alone. Until I have more time, I can meet you…wherever you are.”

Yibo’s eyes widened as Xiao Zhan smiled naturally at him.

“You’d…you’d come visit me? Like now?”

“If that’s okay.”

“And you’re okay with people seeing you with me in public?”

“Sweetie…you know we’ll still have to be careful, right? But if I have to come to a set to see you so we don't have to go two months without seeing each other…I will.”

Yibo let the implications of what Xiao Zhan meant sink in. 

“What if…people think-”

“Let them.”

“What if someone asks-”

“We’re friends for all they need to know.”

“What if-”

“We’ll handle it together. I’m sick of others dictating what my life looks like…I’m sick of trying to please everyone and not living my one life the way I want it to…I’m done letting others narrate the story of my life.” 

* * *

They lay in silence, cuddling, soaking in each other’s presence. Yibo held Xiao Zhan in his arms, planting kisses on his head every now and then, until he had dozed off.

_He must be so tired and so sick of everything to say that. The fact that he has reached this point where he’s okay with being an open secret._ Yibo mused. _He must have felt so powerless and out of control. But is his decision right?_

Yibo went back and forth in his mind about Xiao Zhan’s wishes before ultimately chuckling inwardly. 

_Who am I kidding? If I had my way, everyone would know that this man is mine and I am his!!_

He remained still so as to not wake Xiao Zhan. He held him close and thought about what their future may look like if they were an open secret. 

_He could come visit me on the SDOC set. Maybe I could even hold his hand when it’s safe. Yixing-ge, Jiaer-ge shouldn't be a problem…I’ll have to wait and see who the fourth captain is and if he or she can be trusted. I can wear the ox necklace again!_ Yibo grew excited. _I could wear the ring sometimes! Maybe even on my finger._

Before his mind could get ahead of himself, Yibo felt Xiao Zhan stir. 

“Go back to sleep,” Yibo whispered. 

“No,” Xiao Zhan opened his eyes sleepily and cuddled closer.

“It’s okay, baobao,” Yibo laughed softly and kissed his forehead. “We have time, don't we?”

“Mn,” Xiao Zhan nodded and tilted his face up to look at Yibo. “But I’ve waited long enough.”

He leaned closer and placed a kiss on Yibo’s lip. He pulled back and looked into his eyes deeply for a few moments before closing the distance once again. He adjusted himself and crawled on top of Yibo as he deepened the kiss. Yibo wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan and pulled his face closer by the back of his neck.

They kissed unhurriedly for several minutes as Xiao Zhan’s body lay plastered against Yibo. 

“I missed you,” Xiao Zhan spoke in a needy voice. “I missed you.”

He moved against Yibo, rubbing against his hardening erection, generating more heat between them, not holding back on the full mouthed kisses. Yibo moaned as Xiao Zhan dove in deeper. He flipped them over and got on top, grinding down hard against Xiao Zhan’s erection. 

“Aah,” Xiao Zhan moaned as Yibo made his way down his jawline and neck, licking and kissing every inch of his skin. 

“I missed you too, sweetheart,” Yibo whispered as his hands slid under his shirt and caressed his warm skin.

Slowly, their shirts came off, their shorts and pants slipped off, until they were completely naked. 

“I just want to feel your hands on me,” Xiao Zhan breathed shakily as Yibo ran his hands down his back and grabbed his ass.

Yibo smiled against his lips and pulled back for a brief moment.

“Your wish is my command.”

“And I want your lips all over me…”

Yibo’s eyes darkened and he nodded.

“Anything else?”

“Not tonight…if that’s oka-”

Yibo kissed Xiao Zhan before he could apologize and licked him inside out, showering him with all his love and affection.

“Whatever you want, baobao…we’ll only do whatever you want.”

Xiao Zhan smiled as Yibo kissed his way down his body and wrapped his lips around every inch of him. He sighed and clutched the pillow as Yibo left a wet trail all over him, kissing, sucking, licking, and kissing some more. 

Yibo’s tongue dipped in and out of every curve and licked its way along every edge of Xiao Zhan as his hand played with Xiao Zhan’s erection lightly, teasingly, lovingly. He moved his hand along the erection, pumping it every now and then with gentle twists, as he traced and tracked every erogenous part of Xiao Zhan.

His hands kneaded into Xiao Zhan’s ass as he kissed all around his length before licking it generously. 

“Yibo…” Xiao Zhan moaned as he trembled under Yibo’s touches. 

Yibo engulfed Xiao Zhan’s erection with his mouth and increased his pace. He cupped his balls and stroked and massaged them as he worked his length. Soon, Xiao Zhan’s hands were clutching Yibo’s hair and he was coming in his mouth helpessly. Yibo took it all, lapping up every ounce of Xiao Zhan, wringing his orgasm out of him to the very last drop before resuming to lick and kiss the length.

“You’re gonna kill me if you’re trying to get me to go again,” Xiao Zhan let out a breathy laugh and pulled Yibo back up.

“Just wanna make you feel good,” Yibo whispered and kissed his way back up.

“Now it’s your turn…”

“We don't have to-”

“It’ll make me feel good…”

“Yeah?” Yibo eyed Xiao Zhan and brushed his hair aside. “It’s really not necessary.”

“It’ll make me feel so good,” Xiao Zhan whispered and stroked Yibo with his hand. 

Yibo shut his eyes and hissed at the contact.

“Okay…” he managed to say as Xiao Zhan began working him feverishly, “if you insist.”

Xiao Zhan stroked him passionately and kissed his neck as Yibo groaned helplessly.

“We haven't done this in a while,” Yibo managed to speak as Xiao Zhan’s hands worked him in ways so familiar yet so different.

“Mmm,” Xiao Zhan lay him back and crawled down. “Just wanna taste.”

Yibo breathed heavily as Xiao Zhan took his hardness in his mouth and sucked on it like his life depended on it. He gasped when Xiao Zhan deep throated him and felt his eyes roll all the way to the back when his hands teased his rim. 

Before he knew it, it was too much and he was coming like a crashing wave into Xiao Zhan’s mouth. When he opened his eyes, Xiao Zhan was licking the corners of his mouth clean with a satisfied smile on his face. 

“Come here,” Yibo sighed and extended his hand out for Xiao Zhan.

Xiao Zhan nuzzled against his neck and entangled their limbs together as they slept side by side. As their sweaty bodies stuck together, they clung to each other, letting sleep slowly take over.

"Ge..."

"Hmm?"

"So you're sure that's what you really want? To be an open secret?"

“Mn...I love you,” Xiao Zhan whispered.

“I love you more,” Yibo smiled.

“Not possible.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also, chapter two of ['love thy neighbor'](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26408098/chapters/64431883%22) is out!


	260. That's the song

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEW PROMO MATERIAL OUT FOR XZ'S DRAMA AND HE IS IN A SHORT MILITARY HAIR CUT HELP ME
> 
> https://twitter.com/loeyxzhan01127/status/1306212851858599937?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1306235403062501378?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1306235066423472129s=20  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1306250100386062337?s=20

* * *

“I think you broke the internet.”

“I didn't break the internet.”

“Look at that, ge,” Yibo pointed. “You’ve just posted the red plum art a few hours ago and it’s taken over social media”

Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes and put his phone aside.

“I wish I could like it,” Yibo sighed and stared at the painting. “It’s so beautiful.”

“Yibo…” Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow in warning.

“But I won’t,” Yibo smirked and put his phone aside as well. “Come here…”

He cuddled and buried his face in Xiao Zhan’s neck.

“Still not ready to reinstall Weibo on your phone?”

Xiao Zhan didn't reply. He let out a soft sigh and hugged Yibo closer. 

“It was just so much hate,” Xiao Zhan broke the silence after several seconds. “I don’t think I’m ready.”

“And that’s okay,” Yibo whispered and kissed Xiao Zhan’s cheek. “You have your studio account to post all the work stuff anyway…and Oasis seems to be more suited to you right now…do what feels right.”

“Thanks,” Xiao Zhan smiled and kissed Yibo back.

They went back and forth exchanging kisses until both were reduced to giggling messes, each trying to outdo the other with the next kiss.

“Ge,” Yibo spoke again when they finally caught their breaths.

“Hmm?”

“How long has it been since you went a single night without waking up from a nightmare?”

“It’s been like this since…” Xiao Zhan shrugged, “but it’ll be okay soon. Don't worry.”

“I just wish I could help…” Yibo turned onto his back and stared at the ceiling.

“You _are_ helping,” Xiao Zhan entwined their fingers together and looked at him. 

“I wish I could help _more._ ” Yibo turned to face him.

“You have no idea how much of a difference you’ve made in my life, Wang Yibo,” Xiao Zhan placed a hand on his cheek and whispered. “You give me strength when I can't find it in myself. You _have_ helped more than you’ll ever know.”

Yibo rushed closer and sealed their lips together on hearing Xiao Zhan’s words. He placed his hand on Xiao Zhan’s and leaned into the touch as they kissed. Xiao Zhan lay back and Yibo followed and soon they were a mess of lips and limbs, as their hot breaths mingled.

“Aren’t you gonna be late for your shoot?” Xiao Zhan grabbed Yibo by the hair and pulled him back for a moment.

“Have a few minutes,” Yibo breathed heavily, looking at Xiao Zhan with lidded eyes.

Xiao Zhan eyed the lines and curves of Yibo’s face and neck and gulped, resisting the urge to mark him. 

“Let’s make them count then,” Xiao Zhan grinned and pushed Yibo back on the bed.

* * *

Xiao Zhan opened the latest email from his manager as he lounged in the hotel room alone. He pursed his lips when he saw that she had sent him another potential solo song. So far, none of the options had struck a chord with him. But her words in the email caught his attention.

_This is the one._ Was all she had said in the email.

With a heavy exhale, he opened the email to listen to the demo.

_Believe in your instincts  
they have never changed.  
That first face from the star  
has weathered through changes,  
too much that can't be predicted  
quietly overcoming  
Welcoming a future no matter how far it is  
Zooming in and focusing on each and everyday  
Every moment has to be filled with passion_

Xiao Zhan felt his heart resonate immediately on hearing the upbeat tune and opening words. He could feel his spirits being uplifted with the song and also saw the past one month flash in front of his eyes. 

_Cause we've got one life one world  
So let's come together  
We'll weather the storm  
A rain of colors  
Look up to the sky  
We're all made of shooting stars  
We are made to love_

The words felt like they could have been written by him. His heart soared with the message the song was conveying and he realized he was humming along with the rest of the song. 

Just as the song ended, he heard a sound behind him and turned to find Yibo standing in the hallway. 

“When did you get back?” Xiao Zhan pulled his earphones out and stood up with a smile, walking over to Yibo.

“That’s the song, ge,” Yibo answered instead.

“What?”

“I heard you humming along with the words…it’s perfect for you,” Yibo replied, his voicy deep and thick with emotion. “And it seemed to make you very happy.”

Xiao Zhan paused and took in Yibo’s words. It was true. Right from the first beat in the song to the last word, he had felt a wave of joy and positivity. The song had conveyed a large part of what he would have wanted to say to his fans and everyone regarding the hate. 

“It’s the best way to shut them up, Zhan-ge,” Yibo closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around his waist. 

“You really think this song is right for me?”

“It’s light yet meaningful, it’s upbeat yet soulful, and the words…from what little I heard seem to be positive yet moving.”

“Mn,” Xiao Zhan nodded and then smiled wider. “I think so too.”

“So then take it,” Yibo brushed aside a strand of Xiao Zhan’s hair. 

“Okay, but that means I’ll be heading back to Beijing,” Xiao Zhan teased and kissed Yibo’s finger.

“I take it back then!” Yibo encircled his arms around Xiao Zhan tightly, not letting him go. “Stay! I can earn enough for the both of us!!”

Xiao Zhan laughed and pretended to think about the offer. 

“I wouldn't mind a sugar daddy!” Xiao Zhan smirked. “But if I were to have a sugar daddy, shouldn't he be someone older than me?” He wiggled his eyebrows. 

“You!” Yibo’s eyes widened in surprise and he pulled Xiao Zhan closer by his waist, digging his fingers in.

“Ow!” Xiao Zhan laughed and tried to break free from Yibo’s grip. “Stop it!”

“Take it back then!” Yibo kept poking into Xiao Zhan’s sides. “Take back what you said!”

“Okay, okay…” Xiao Zhan cackled but surrendered. “I don't need another sugar daddy!”

“Say you only want me!” Yibo tickled Xiao Zhan even as he fell to the floor in his fit of laughter.

“Ayyaaa! I do…I only want you!” Xiao Zhan tried fighting Yibo off.

“Say you only need me…” Yibo pinned Xiao Zhan to the ground and loomed over him. 

“I only need you,” Xiao Zhan whispered when he finally caught his breath and gazed into Yibo’s darkening eyes. 

They stared at each for several moments before Xiao Zhan managed to suddenly free his hands from Yibo’s grip. He yanked at Yibo’s shirt and pulled him down until their lips crashed together.

“I only ever want you, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan breathed against his lips before moving to his ear and whispering. “I also want to fuck you. Now.”

Yibo’s eyes widened and he pulled back a little to look at Xiao Zhan.

“Are-are you sure?”

“Mhmm,” Xiao Zhan grinned.

Yibo scrambled off Xiao Zhan and led him to the bed eagerly. Xiao Zhan laughed as his clothes were ripped off impatiently and when Yibo struggled to get out of his pants. Finally, when they were naked, Yibo raised an eyebrow at Xiao Zhan.

“I brought the lube,” Xiao Zhan gestured to the drawer and Yibo hurriedly took it out. 

When he tossed the lube to Xiao Zhan, he tossed it back and Yibo looked at him confused.

“I want to watch you prep yourself,” Xiao Zhan spoke firmly as he slid his hands up and down Yibo’s leg. “I want to see you touch yourself.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The red plum blossom song -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYobu2AkSWI&ab_channel=FefeH
> 
> Light spot song -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrgOWlm-xAM&ab_channel=TheLotusHeart


	261. Answer the call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this crack chapter in a fit lol you have been warned. also, now that xz is resuming working slowly, i might not always update each time he appears! yay for him though! so excited for actor xz to be back! his cctv drama might release on tencent and even youtube (with subs) if reports are to be believed!

* * *

Yibo swallowed his protest when he saw the hunger in Xiao Zhan’s eyes. His mouth turned dry when Xiao Zhan’s eyes traced an invisible line on his body, stopping at his now leaking erection. He felt like a prized possession and he was going to give him a show. 

Xiao Zhan crawled forward and pushed Yibo onto his back until he was laying down. He spread Yibo’s legs and placed himself between them. Yibo watched as Xiao Zhan grabbed his hand and squeezed out a generous amount of lube onto Yibo’s fingers. 

Yibo was about to insert one finger in when Xiao Zhan’s voice interrupted him.

“Wait…”

Xiao Zhan crouched between his legs and spread them wider. He pushed Yibo’s knees to his chest and bent down placing kisses all along his inner thigh, his crotch, his dick, his balls, until he was at the pink rim. 

Xiao Zhan licked a strip straight across the opening, making Yibo shudder at the sudden wet contact. When a soft moan escaped his lips, Xiao Zhan’s tongue repeated the action a few more times before licking the periphery of the rim teasingly.

“Ge…” Yibo whined, helpless and aroused.

“Now,” Xiao Zhan dragged his length over the rim, eliciting a hiss from Yibo, “touch yourself.”

“More ge…” Yibo sighed when Xiao Zhan pulled his dick back, craving the heavy warmth.

Xiao Zhan dragged his erection over the rim a few more times and teased it open with it just enough to draw more moans from Yibo. 

“If you want this inside, you have to touch yourself first, _Wang Yibo_ ,” Xiao Zhan’s voice trailed sweetly.

Yibo gulped and bit his lips as he inserted a finger inside him. He locked eyes with Xiao Zhan and pushed his finger in and out, watching in satisfaction as Xiao Zhan’s dick twitched in interest. 

Xiao Zhan ran a lazy hand over Yibo’s erection while stroking himself with his other hand. Yibo groaned at the building pleasure and began scissoring himself open, eager for more. He never once left Xiao Zhan’s stare, lidded and dark. 

“Like what you see, ge?” Yibo asked in a raspy voice with a small smirk.

“Always,” Xiao Zhan replied thickly. “More.”

Yibo inserted a third finger and dove deep within himself. He threw his head back at the sensations and moaned loud enough for Xiao Zhan to lean forward over him and press their mouths together. 

Xiao Zhan eyed his face as Yibo thrust his fingers into himself. Lust clouded his eyes and he stroked them harder with every thrust that sent Yibo gasping and reeling. 

“Wanna…wanna come with you in me, ge…” Yibo managed to speak in broken breaths as Xiao Zhan worked them at a fervent pace. 

Xiao Zhan kissed him hungrily, laying wet kisses all over his mouth, neck, and chest and before Yibo could demand more, he swiped Yibo’s hand away and thrust his fingers into him. Yibo moaned and dug his fingers into Xiao Zhan’s shoulders. 

“Someone’s ready,” Xiao Zhan growled and pulled his fingers out. 

He lined up with Yibo and entered him, nearly folding him in half. 

“Always,” Yibo breathed heavily and clawed his way down Xiao Zhan’s arm. 

“Impatient much?” Xiao Zhan hissed at the marks Yibo left on his skin.

“Fuck me, ge…”

Xiao Zhan pushed in with the full force of his body weight on top of Yibo. He growled when he bottomed out and Yibo groaned at the depth of contact. He adjusted his hips, thrusting upwards, begging Xiao Zhan to move.

Xiao Zhan grabbed his legs for leverage and positioned Yibo just right. He rammed into him mercilessly, prompting Yibo to moan and shudder, his fingers clawing at the pillow now. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful when you’re getting wrecked by me,” Xiao Zhan rasped and thrust in harder and faster.

Both men groaned as they inched towards their climax. Just then, Yibo’s phone rang and Xiao Zhan’s hips stuttered with the interruption. 

“Ignore it,” Yibo whined as he tried to reach the phone to turn it off. 

“Take it,” Xiao Zhan paused his movements and smirked. 

“What? Fuck no! Finish what you started, Xiao Zhan!” Yibo grit his teeth and rolled his hips up desperately. 

“Answer the call or I pull out…” Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow.

“You mean…if I answer…you’ll…” Yibo huffed in impatience.

“I’ll fuck you real good if you take the call right now, Wang Yibo,” Xiao Zhan spoke in a low, deep voice.

Yibo felt a strong urge of arousal at his words and images they conjured. With nervous excitement, he picked up the phone and answered the call. 

“Wei?” Yibo managed to speak despite his thundering heart. 

Xiao Zhan gave him a side grin and resumed moving. Yibo’s breath hitched at the first thrust and he nearly choked on his words.

“Yeah…umm…” Yibo spoke with great difficulty as Xiao Zhan began ramming into him in full earnest, “okay…I’ll be uhh there mmm earlier tomor-aaahhh I mean…tomorrow…”

Xiao Zhan didn't suppress his smirk. He hovered over Yibo’s trembling lips and thrust into him one more time hard and fast. 

“YES!” Yibo screamed. “I mean…yes yes…I got it.” 

Yibo threw his phone aside and Xiao Zhan crashed their lips together as he fucked Yibo through their orgasms. He stifled every groan into his mouth and let the sound of their sweaty skins slapping together get louder and more lewd. 

When they finally pulled apart, Xiao Zhan and Yibo let out long, drawn out, satisfied sighs and separated. Xiao Zhan fell beside Yibo and let out a short breathy chuckle.

“What the fuck,” Yibo turned to him, panting and astonished, “was that!??”

“It was fucking amazing,” Xiao Zhan giggled and turned to plant a kiss on Yibo’s confused lips. 

“You’re going to be the death of me,” Yibo chuckled and wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan’s damp body.

“Sorry,” Xiao Zhan whispered as he kissed Yibo’s sweaty forehead. 

“Don't be,” Yibo whispered back and pecked at his lips, “it was fucking amazing.”

* * *

Xiao Zhan dropped his packed bag by the door and then turned around to face a sullen Yibo.

“I can't believe it’s already time to go,” Yibo sulked with a pout.

“If you act this cute, I won't be able to leave, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan smiled sadly and tried curving the pout into a smile with his fingers. 

“Then don't,” Yibo hugged Xiao Zhan and sighed. 

“Don’t you want me to go back to work?” Xiao Zhan laughed. 

“I just don't want-” Yibo began but hesitated.

“Don't want what?” Xiao Zhan kissed his forehead. 

Yibo pulled away and looked at Xiao Zhan solemnly.

“The last time we separated…”

Xiao Zhan understood. The last time he and Yibo had parted ways, his life had turned upside down and there was nothing Yibo could do.

“I just don't want something bad to happen again,” Yibo muttered softly. 

Xiao Zhan pulled him into an embrace. 

“Nothing bad is gonna happen to me. Even when things are going wrong. Understand?”

“Mn,” Yibo’s muffled voice replied against Xiao Zhan’s chest. 

“I’ll see you again at the end of the month, right?” Xiao Zhan asked in a cheery voice. 

“Okay,” Yibo straightened his face and nodded with a small smile.

“I love you,” Xiao Zhan kissed Yibo’s nose. “I can't wait to see you at home.”

“I can't wait to be home too,” Yibo sighed and hugged Xiao Zhan again. “I can't wait to come back home to you.”


	262. This too shall pass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New fic for the bjyx prompt fest - ['If you had to do this all over again'](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26535265) \- Xiao Zhan goes to bed the day he rejects Yibo's confession telling himself that he's made a difficult decision for the good of them both. Then he has to make that decision all over again, and again, and again. (Or: Groundhog day AU).

* * *

Xiao Zhan was busy for the rest of April. Busy trying to get his life and career back on track, tackling each day one problem at a time. 

“First things first,” his manager spoke in the meeting over video. “We need to take legal action against the hate accounts that are targeting you. This kind of cyber bullying must be stopped.”

“So that it can't happen to anyone else,” Xiao Zhan added with a nod.

“We have a law firm in Beijing willing to take your case. We can post an announcement to the studio’s Weibo,” she confirmed. 

“Sounds like a plan,” Xiao Zhan replied with a nervous grin. “Just got out of one lawsuit and now I’m launching into an even bigger, more public one,” he sighed.

“This one is different, laoban,” the woman smiled encouragingly. “This one will help more people in the long run. The government has been very vocal about taking precautionary measures to make these social media platforms safer and more positive.”

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan gave a brisk nod of approval. “Okay.”

“Now,” she cleared her throat, “in regards to work…the red plum blossom song is being received very well and it’s the perfect time to plan your single.”

“I’ve chosen my song,” Xiao Zhan smiled, trying to contain his excitement. 

“The team likes it too…so should we go ahead and schedule the recording?”

“Yes!”

“Great! Was there anything else?”

“One more thing,” Xiao Zhan looked at her thoughtfully. “I want to donate some money and supplies to the relief efforts.”

“That’s perfect, it would look great if we post-”

“I don't want to post about it…just donate anonymously,” Xiao Zhan shook his hands in dismissal.

“But it would be very good for-”

“No,” Xiao Zhan spoke with finality. “I don't want to use this for my professional gain.”

“Are you sure? This could do wonders for your reputation.”

“I’m sure. Charity is not about personal benefits…I just want to do my bit for the greater good.”

When the call ended, Xiao Zhan let out a long exhale and stretched his neck. He played the new song he was to record on loop to rehearse when a sudden idea struck him. 

_Why not make some art work for this one too? It was such a satisfying experience, painting for the red plum blossom song._

With those thoughts, Xiao Zhan jumped up and rushed to his study, where he buried himself for the rest of the day.

* * *

Before he knew it, the weeks had flown by and he had worked on much more than just the art for the song. His creativity had begun to flow once more and he sighed in relief when he realized that. 

It was also time to record the song and Xiao Zhan found himself inside a recording studio once again. It felt strange meeting people outside of his family, Yibo, and his team. His team was by his side the entire time and much to his relief, there was no awkwardness or mention of the scandal, when he met the rest of the people. 

Yet, Xiao Zhan couldn't completely silence the nagging voice that lingered in his head telling him that this would be a huge failure. That there was no point in trying to resurrect his career. That he was only risking the reputation of his collaborators by working with them. 

Xiao Zhan did the one thing he could, he forced his mind to focus on the words he was singing. 

_Have all the extreme moments_  
_Experience my own change_  
_Walking through the scars that become my spotlight_

_That we’ve got one life one world_  
_So let’s come together_  
_We’ll weather the storm_  
_A rain of colors Look up to the sky_  
_We’re all made of shooting stars_

_We are made to love_

_Nothing is permanent._ Xiao Zhan reminded himself later that day as he decided to post one of his drawings to Oasis. _I can't hide inside forever. Everything comes and goes. This too shall pass._

With those thoughts, he decided to post a drawing that he had made inspired by a photo of Yibo and his favorite book, the little prince, both sources of positivity and hope for him. 

_I should only focus on what I can control. I want to come back into the public eye on my own terms._ He decided when he settled into bed. _And I will let my art speak for me._

* * *

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo jumped into Xiao Zhan’s open arms when he rushed into the house. “I’m home!”

“Finally!” Xiao Zhan embraced Yibo and squeezed him tightly.

They stayed in the hug for several minutes, swaying silently. Yibo nuzzled closer as Xiao Zhan wrapped his arms around to pull him further into the embrace. 

“You were supposed to be here tomorrow,” Xiao Zhan finally broke the silence. 

“I thought I’d surprise you,” Yibo smiled and looked up at him. “So I took the flight out as soon as we wrapped up.”

“You must be exhausted,” Xiao Zhan brushed aside the stray strands of hair on his forehead, leaning forward to kiss it softly. 

“I wanted to be here with you when you dropped your single,” Yibo grinned and placed a gentle kiss on Xiao Zhan’s lips. 

“I wanted you here with me too,” Xiao Zhan kissed him back.

He cupped Yibo’s cheek and deepened the kiss. As they melted in each other’s arms, Xiao Zhan let out a long, happy sigh. 

“I’m right here, ge,” Yibo whispered against his lips. “I’ll be right by your side while you do this now.”

“Mn,” Xiao Zhan nodded and finally released him. “Let’s do this.”

They sat side by side on the bed as Xiao Zhan waited for the confirmation from his team that the song was officially available on the music platform. When the text came, Xiao Zhan felt a sudden dread creep up on him.

“What if…what if no one buys it?”

“People will buy it, ge. It’s a great song. And there are many people who love you despite the fact that the hate seems louder now,” Yibo squeezed his arm and smiled.

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan bit his lips. “I think…I’m just gonna turn my phone off. Otherwise I’ll drive myself crazy wondering and checking again and again.”

“Come here,” Yibo lay back and beckoned to Xiao Zhan. 

Xiao Zhan adjusted himself against the curve of Yibo’s body and snuggled closer. 

“It’s going to be alright, baobao,” Yibo kissed him on the head. “You’ll see.”

With those words, they let themselves drift off into a deep slumber. 

* * *

When Xiao Zhan woke up, he was still in Yibo’s arms and his phone was still off. He felt the most relaxed he had felt in a long time and decided he wanted it to stay that way. Instead of turning his phone back on, he turned onto his side and cuddled Yibo and closed his eyes again. 

Yibo stirred in his sleep at the movement and opened his eyes slowly. 

“Zhan-ge?” He mumbled groggily.

“Sorry…go back to sleep,” Xiao Zhan whispered and pulled Yibo closer. 

“Aren’t you curious about your song?” Yibo ran his hand down Xiao Zhan’s back soothingly, coaxing him back awake. 

“No,” Xiao Zhan lied.

“It’s okay to be scared,” Yibo smiled and kissed Xiao Zhan’s temple. “Let’s have a look…”

“No!” Xiao Zhan whined and crawled on top of Yibo, trapping him under. “Sleep more. You’ve got only one day off before you start working again. We’ll check later-”

“Uhh, Zhan-ge,” Yibo’s voice interrupted him flat and hard, “you’re going to want to check it now…”

“How did you even reach your phone!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed when he looked up and saw Yibo staring at his screen.

“Ge…”

“What?” Xiao Zhan rolled off and huffed in disappointment and disinterest. “Okay, tell me.”

“You’ve done 13.5 million in sales in just twelve hours.” 

“What?”

“Ge…at this rate, you’ll be breaking all the previous sale records.” 

“Ha ha…very funny, Yibo…” Xiao Zhan smacked him on the chest lightly, unamused.

“I’m not joking, ge,” Yibo sat up and shoved his phone in Xiao Zhan’s face. “Look!”

Xiao Zhan eyed Yibo cautiously as he sat upright. He bit his lips and looked at the app page Yibo had open. It was his song and the number below the song title was ticking up with every passing second. 

“What the fuck,” Xiao Zhan blurted. “This can’t be…there’s a bug in the app,” his eyes widened.

“SUCK ON THIS, HATERS!” Yibo screamed as he jumped on the bed. “EAT SHIT WHILE YOU WATCH MY ZHAN-GE FLY HIGH!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XZ studio lawyer notice -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1253299748716417024?s=20
> 
> XZ posted more art work to his oasis -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1252252798948831234
> 
> XZ light spot sales -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1254078576481103873?s=20


	263. I'm scared something bad will happen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XIAO ZHAN OATH OF LOVE TRAILER IS OUT!  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1308270243052097536?s=20
> 
> AND YIBO BEING A HERO PREVIEW IS OUT TOO!  
> https://twitter.com/ZhanGeBoDi/status/1308250155045531649
> 
> ALSO XIAO ZHAN BTS FOR CAI DING (IN THE COVID DRAMA) IS OUT  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhvns/status/1308398738755338241?s=20
> 
> AND LAST BUT DEFINITELY NOT THE LEAST, XZ POSTED TO OASIS AND WEIBO AND THAT TOO A FUNNY MEME OF HIMSELF FROM THE OOL TRAILER!!! HE'S FINALLY BACK TO BEING MORE OF HIMSELF ON SOCIAL MEDIA, JOKING AROUND AND SHARING PERSONAL MESSAGES!!!!!!!! IM CRY!!!!  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1308303020900249600?s=20
> 
> happy reading, hope all this good news makes up for the chapter that you are about to read lol.

* * *

By end of the day, Xiao Zhan had, in fact, broken the digital sales record to become the fastest selling artist by selling 24.3 million copies across all platforms and making 73 million yuan. Or so Yibo told him. 

“ZHAN-GE!!!!” Yibo shouted. “WHAT A COMEBACK!”

Yibo launched himself at Xiao Zhan who stood in the balcony sipping his tea. 

“Wha-umpppffff,” Xiao Zhan’s question was cut short when Yibo’s body slammed into him. 

“Congratulations, ge! You’ve surpassed everyone and set a new record!” Yibo hugged him hard. “You’ve claimed all the sales titles and plaques those platforms have to offer - silver, gold, platinum - it’s all yours!!” 

Xiao Zhan remained silent and when Yibo pulled back, he saw tears in his eyes.

“Baobao,” Yibo softened immediately and cupped Xiao Zhan’s cheeks. “It’s okay…are these happy tears or…?”

“I’m scared something bad will happen,” Xiao Zhan whispered and looked away. 

“Hey,” Yibo caressed his cheeks and turned him towards him again, “what do you mean?”

“I’m worried that the haters and antis will find something to criticize me on with this as well and-”

“Don't forget what you promised yourself, ge.” Yibo spoke firmly and gently. “That you are not going to worry about what others think any more. Haters will always find something to hate about. Don't let them overshadow your insane achievement.”

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan took in a deep breath and nodded.

“Now smile for me,” Yibo placed a kiss on the corner of his lips and whispered.

Xiao Zhan managed a watery smile as he wiped his tears. 

“Good,” Yibo smiled back and planted another kiss on his lips. “Congratulations, Zhan-ge…you’re the best selling artist in China.”

“I’m going to ask the studio to post a thank you message and also ask the fans to be rational when buying!” Xiao Zhan took out his phone and began texting.

“Wait, what? What do you mean to be rational when buying?” 

“I don't want my fans to reach beyond their practical means to make a point about my career,” Xiao Zhan explained with a serious look. “Otherwise there’s no difference between the extreme hate and extreme love I am getting. It has to be rational and realistic to be sustainable.”

“You’re the first celebrity who’s telling their fans to not buy their product,” Yibo rolled his eyes. 

“I’m not telling them to not buy it…I just want them to be practical in the way they express their love for me,” Xiao Zhan chuckled. “And if I had my way,” he put his phone aside and wrapped his arms around Yibo’s waist, “I would do away with these hot searches, and super topics, and voting systems too!”

“You’re really reaching now, ge,” Yibo shook his head in amusement.

“Maybe,” Xiao Zhan shrugged. 

“But I love you for exactly this reason…you’re not after all these superficial things most celebrities chase,” Yibo rested his forehead against Xiao Zhan’s and smiled. “You’re real.”

“I love you because you’re real too,” Xiao Zhan replied with an affectionate smile that was reserved only for him. 

* * *

Xiao Zhan wasn’t completely wrong. And as if to prove him right, the haters’ response in the coming days was threefold.

His single soon became embroiled in a controversy that his fans were forced into buying the single in bulk by fan clubs even when it was beyond their means. He watched in silence as the music platforms and social media were bombarded with hateful comments.

_How much money did Xiao Zhan pay these so-called fans to buy his song?!_

_Who would pay to buy his song!? I hate him!!_

_These fan clubs are running like mafia rings!_

_I heard he’s plagiarized this song. What else can one expect from him!? Shameless!_

_Which bastard sang this song!? Take it off the shelf now!_

_Everyone who buys this song is wicked and must be cursed._

The only thing Xiao Zhan could do was follow Yibo’s advice and not pay attention to the haters who would find anything they could lay their hands on to turn into a point of contempt and hate. It took all his will power to not respond to the hate and defend himself.

But the self restraint broke when the second blow came, not to him but to someone he cared about deeply. He received an unexpected message from his team, informing him that He Jiong, the host of Happy Camp, with whom Xiao Zhan had worked on in Who’s the Murderer as well, had received some backlash for showing support to him by inviting him on his variety show. 

“We had barely begun discussing my appearance on Back to Field,” Xiao Zhan exclaimed into the phone call with his manager. “I can't believe someone found out so quickly and already attacked him for it!!”

“I know, laoban, but-”

“I can't keep quiet anymore! Jiong-ge was just being nice and trying to be supportive!” Xiao Zhan’s lips trembled as he read the hateful words written against He Jiong on social media as well. 

“Laoban, please-”

“No. Cancel my appearance on the show. And for now, reject any other appearances and brands coming my way. No one deserves to get caught in this hate storm.”

“But what about you, Xiao Zhan?!?” The manager finally exploded. “This is supposed to be your first appearance since the scandal. Hunan TV supports you and wants you on their show. What about you!?”

“I’ll be fine, jie!” Xiao Zhan replied quietly. “Please. I won't be able to live with myself if others suffer because of me. Trust me. Please cancel this appearance. I’ll call him and explain it myself.”

Twenty minutes later, Xiao Zhan got off the call with He Jiong and decided to break his Weibo silence by posting an appeal to his account asking people not to slander others. In his short but direct post, he apologized once again for taking up public resources but asked people to refrain from attacking others.

The last blow came later that night when he received yet another frantic call from his manager.

“What is it now?” Xiao Zhan asked in a dull, tired voice as he sat in the porch swing in the dark.

“They’re saying that we never made donations to the relief efforts and are making fake claims-”

“Wait…” Xiao Zhan stood up, eyebrows knitted in confusion, “how do they know about our donations?”

There was silence at the other end. 

“Jie?”

“We released an anonymous tip to the media and the fan clubs got wind of it and shared the information.”

Just then Yibo walked out onto the porch, having just returned from his shoot. The smile on his face vanished immediately when he saw the angry look on Xiao Zhan’s face. 

“I thought I made it very clear that I did not want my donations to be used for professional leverage!” Xiao Zhan grit his teeth and seethed in rage. 

His manager stuttered and remained silent. 

“This is absolutely unacceptable behaviour from my own team!!” Xiao Zhan screamed, startling both Yibo and the manager. “You broke my trust!”

“Laoban…sorry…we didn't mean to,” the manager fumbled for words, “...it was all my fault. I take responsibility for this.”

Yibo rushed to Xiao Zhan’s side and placed a hand on his arm in an attempt to calm him down. Xiao Zhan flinched at the contact and Yibo was taken aback by the glare on his face. But on seeing Yibo, Xiao Zhan finally let out a slow exhale and tried to relax his temper. 

“I will deal with this breach of my trust later,” Xiao Zhan grit his teeth and tempered his tone, “but for now, please release proof of our donations so that no one can accuse me of lying and bragging.”

“Yes, I will do that first thing tomorrow morning,” the manager spoke eagerly.

“Is there anything else?” Xiao Zhan shut his eyes and massaged his temple.

“No, and once again, I am very sorry, laoban.”

“Good night,” Xiao Zhan replied curtly and ended the call. 

For several seconds, there was just the silence interspersed with the sound of the crickets in the night. Xiao Zhan leaned over the porch railing and let out a long, exhausted sigh. 

Yibo, unsure of what had happened and still trying to piece everything together from the bits he had heard, stood quietly with both hands on Xiao Zhan’s shoulder. He massaged him gently and waited. 

“Just when I think I’ve taken a few steps forward…” Xiao Zhan whispered.

Yibo’s heart broke hearing how defeated Xiao Zhan sounded. It broke further as Xiao Zhan explained everything that had gone down since the release of the song. 

"There doesn't seem to be any end to the hate they have for me," Xiao Zhan said meekly and hung his head, disappointed and defeated. "Where is this hate coming from? Who are these people who hate me so much?!"

“Come here,” he turned Xiao Zhan to face him and pulled him into a long, warm embrace. “We’ll get through this,” he whispered back and kissed Xiao Zhan’s cheek. “You _will_ get through this.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> with this chapter we are at the end of april 2020. also, all three issues mentioned in this chapter did happen after xz's song release.
> 
> source -  
> https://www.todayonline.com/8days/sceneandheard/entertainment/chinese-actor-xiao-zhan-was-accused-making-fake-donation-covid-19


	264. I felt confused

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone interested in ZSWW (top xz, bottom yibo) or LSFY (switching) or just reading more yizhan fics in general, check [this](https://twitter.com/zswwlsfy_events/status/1320146302047432709) out! 
> 
> Also, for anyone who missed it - my [new yizhan fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26535265) is out and it has some angst sprinkled with a happy ending!

* * *

“Hey,” Xiao Zhan whispered into the phone as he sat in the car. “I know you must be busy with TTXS. Do you have a few minutes?”

“Hey, baobao,” came Yibo’s soft reply, “yeah...just taking a break in between shots. How are you feeling?”

“Nervous,” Xiao Zhan responded, slouching further into his corner of the car.

“Where are you now?”

“In the car…on the way to the interview.”

 _My first proper public appearance since the scandal and that too for an interview to address the whole thing!_ His brain added to his misery. 

“Just remember to keep breathing,” Yibo spoke calmly but Xiao Zhan could hear the worry in his voice. “I know you can do this.”

“Really?” Xiao Zhan sighed and rested his head against the window. 

“Really,” Yibo sounded certain. “You are smart, intelligent, and very capable. You know how to navigate the press way better than I do. And you have your own special way of telling the truth without being rude or evasive. I _know_ you can do this.”

Xiao Zhan let a small smile appear on his face at the encouraging words. 

“Okay,” he nodded. 

“And when I fly back from Changsha to Beijing, I’ll show you just how much I love you for being so strong and brave.”

“Really?” Xiao Zhan chuckled and his smile widened.

“Really. I love you so much, baobao,” Yibo replied. “Okay, I have to go now, ge. But don't worry, okay? Good luck with the interview.”

“Mn,” Xiao Zhan straightened himself in his seat and let out a deep exhale. “Thanks, sweetie.”

 _I’ve only become stronger after this whole experience._ Xiao Zhan reminded himself when he ended the call. _I may have remained silent up until now, but now is my chance to tell my side of the story. And I will do it with my dignity and grace intact. I will never forget the values my family taught me. I will never give the haters the satisfaction of thinking they can break me._

* * *

“On April 25th, you posted a Weibo, _‘Keep it in your heart and thank you for all your kind criticisms and corrections. Growing up on the road.’_ There are various interpretations on the internet. What was your thought when you posted this?” The interviewer, a kind looking woman, asked. 

Xiao Zhan took in a short inhale and began.

“When I was 23 years old, I entered the entertainment industry as an amateur. For me, the more important thing was the change in mentality. I have always asked myself to be a state of continuous improvement and continuous learning. Some controversies related to me occurred some time ago, and the controversy occurred at the most critical moment in the nation's fight against the epidemic. In fact, when I was self-isolating at home, I was very upset and apologetic. If these controversies have brought some influence and distress to netizens, I would like to say to them sincerely, sorry.”

 _That wasn't so hard._ Xiao Zhan steadied his breathing and maintained his composure.

“What do the criticisms and corrections that you mentioned refer to?” She asked with a gentle smile. 

“In the beginning, as an amateur dancing and singing, many friends around me, my predecessors, and some netizens, all pointed out a lot of kind criticisms and corrections to me. I myself accept it very much, because I think such corrections will make me progress. But then of course, there are some malicious criticisms, especially some rumors and slanders. I think they are not just for me, they are more to disturb my friends around me, even my family, and do some harm to my family.”

“How did you feel when you first saw these malicious rumors and slanders? Would you feel wronged?”

Xiao Zhan’s lips trembled as he began remembering the two months that had passed amidst utter chaos and hate. He remained silent as he gathered his thoughts and tried to distil them into sensible words.

“I didn't feel wronged…I felt confused.”

* * *

When the interview was released to the public, Xiao Zhan sat alone in his balcony. It was a mixed response. But he chose to focus on the positive and unexpected outcome. A flurry of support from people that called themselves new fans of Xiao Zhan or passerby fans who turned into his supporters because of the scandal.

There was a deluge of comments about how unfair the entire incident was and how Xiao Zhan was at no fault. His manager kept him updated with the reception of his interview as he had no intention of downloading Weibo on his phone anytime soon yet. But hearing about the love and support from fans, both old and new, warmed Xiao Zhan’s heart. 

_Slowly but surely, I’ll get back on my feet. Even if it means taking one step back for every two steps I move forward. I'm going to fight these haters back in my own way._

* * *

A few days later, Xiao Zhan readied himself for yet another public appearance. This time he was singing for the medical workers at the frontlines. As he sang the powerful song, Bamboo in the rocks, for them, he felt the words resonate with him as well. 

_All its nodes, all its internodes, green throughout the four seasons, growing in the winter  
After the spring rain, flourishing across the mountains  
No matter how the winds blow, No matter how the snow blankets over  
It remains straight and unyielding  
Concealing its unyielding spirit, standing upright within the mountains_

_Biting onto the mountains, never loosening its hold  
Its firm roots originating from within the fractured rocks  
The thousands of hardship only bring about greater fortitude  
Never relenting to winds from any direction_

When he got off stage, he was cheered on by the crew and members of his own staff and congratulated for his performance. With half smiles and full bows, he made his way back to his car and then with a long, deep exhale, sat back as they made their way home. 

_I’ve taken my two steps forward. Let’s see what they do now to send me back one step again._ His tired mind thought. 

When he reached home, however, all his exhaustion went flying out the window when he was greeted by three smiling faces.

“It’s mother’s day, ge,” Yibo’s smile widened as he turned towards Xiao Zhan holding the laptop which held the smiling faces of both their mothers on video. 

“I could never forget,” Xiao Zhan smiled in surprise and waved at both the women on the screen. “Happy mother’s day, mama! And you too, aunty-I mean mom.” He grinned sheepishly. 

“How are you, Zhan-Zhan!?” Both women cooed and beamed.

“I’m fine…just back from work.”

“Is it…safe to go back to work now?” Xiao Zhan’s mother asked hesitantly.

“Of course it is, jie!” Yibo’s mother replied with a hand wave. “They just couldn't wait any longer to have A-Zhan back!” 

Xiao Zhan smiled gratefully for her encouragement and relaxed his shoulders when he felt Yibo take his hand in his. 

“You’re right, mom,” Yibo echoed her sentiments. “Everyone’s just dying to have Zhan-ge back in business…all he needs to do is say yes.”

“Well, that’s good,” Xiao Zhan’s mother smiled warmly but Xiao Zhan could see the unshed tears in her eyes. 

When the conversation ended half an hour later, Xiao Zhan decided to post yet another piece of art he had been working on for mother’s day. 

“It looks beautiful,” Yibo murmured as he leaned over Xiao Zhan’s shoulder to get a glimpse of the sketch on his laptop. 

“Thanks, just gonna post it real quick.”

“How did it feel to be back on stage?”

Xiao Zhan’s hands stilled on the keyboard and he remained silent for a while.

“It felt good,” he finally spoke and turned around to face Yibo. “It felt really good.”

“Why do I feel like there’s a but in there?”

“ _But_ ,” Xiao Zhan added with a tired smile, “It made me realize how much I miss acting. It’s been two months, three if you count the initial quarantine…I want to get back in front of the camera…not to apologize and give scandal interviews, not to sing even though I am grateful for that too, but to act…to sink my teeth in a new role and be part of that creative process with a team of artists once again!”

“And you will…soon…” Yibo stood in front of Xiao Zhan and insisted, “I can feel it…something good will come your way and all you have to do is say yes. What about the script you were really excited about?”

“None of those shows seem to be back on track for production, and that one…they haven't gotten back to us since…” Xiao Zhan’s voice trailed off and he let out a sigh. 

He wrapped his arms around Yibo’s hips and buried his face in his stomach. Yibo stood between Xiao Zhan’s legs and massaged his hair, letting him sink into him. He wrapped his arms around him protectively, wishing there was more he could do. 

“Zhan-ge…”

“Hmm…”

“Didi ai ni.” _And tonight I want to show you just how much I love you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> xz economic view interview may 6th -  
> http://www.jwview.com/jingwei/html/05-07/316694.shtml  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzytSWrPeTE&ab_channel=FefeH
> 
> bamboo rock performance on beijing tv may 9th -  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhvns/status/1259101636254855170?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/dramapotatoe/status/1259115569061621760?s=20
> 
> mother’s day art may 9th -  
> https://twitter.com/LANERGONGZl/status/1259351938073796609?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/xiaozhan911005/status/1259334147601911810?s=20


	265. Anything you want

* * *

Xiao Zhan looked up at Yibo who was looking down at him with a soft smile. He stood up and wrapped his arms around his waist, resting his forehead against him. 

“Wo ye ai ni,” he whispered and they smiled at each other.

“Remember when I yelled this on set?” Yibo chuckled. “And you pretended to puke in response?”

“I do,” Xiao Zhan laughed along. “It feels like so long ago but also like it was yesterday. Time is strange.”

“It is, isn’t it?” Yibo sighed and hugged Xiao Zhan.

“I never asked you,” Xiao Zhan began slowly, “what made you scream a love confession on set in front of an entire crew? That too twice!”

Yibo pulled back and looked at Xiao Zhan with a grin.

“You looked really tired that day and I just wanted to cheer you up…” he smirked and shrugged.

“So you were just saying it to cheer me up? No other intentions?” Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow.

“I guess some part of me wanted to say it out loud, scream it from the top of the mountains,” Yibo replied softly, running his hands down Xiao Zhan’s back soothingly. “And not give myself away.”

“Well you certainly caught me off guard…all I could do was balk and pretend to be grossed out by the joke. But if you were any closer, I bet you would have been able to see me blush.”

“Maybe it’s a good thing I didn't see it,” Yibo’s spoke in a low rasp, “otherwise I wouldn't have been able to control myself,” he nipped at Xiao Zhan’s lower lip. 

“Oh, really?” Xiao Zhan smirked. “I don't think you’d have known what to do…”

“Oh I could have done plenty with this body,” Yibo ran his hands down, grabbing and squeezing at Xiao Zhan’s ass. 

“I remember someone being slightly nervous when I was grinding against them the first time,” Xiao Zhan whispered and nipped back at Yibo’s lips. 

“I’ve learnt a lot since our first hand job,” Yibo growled and grabbed Xiao Zhan’s ass and rolled against him.

Xiao Zhan groaned as their hardening lengths rubbed against each other. 

“Yeah?” He teased and began removing Yibo’s pants. “Show me what you’ve learnt, _Lao Wang…_ ” he bit his lower lip seductively. 

Yibo felt the sultry tone go straight to his dick. As soon as Xiao Zhan pulled his shorts down, his erection sprung to life, hard and eager. He watched as Xiao Zhan removed his own jeans slowly next. 

“Show me,” Xiao Zhan repeated as he kissed Yibo’s ear and neck while removing his shirt. “Show me what you wanna do with my body,” he flashed him a smile as he removed his own last shreds of clothing. 

Yibo looked at Xiao Zhan’s naked body with darkening eyes. Then, with a grin, he pushed him back until he was falling on top of the bed. Xiao Zhan scrambled back on the bed as Yibo chased after him, crawling on top. 

“Still waiting, Lao Wang,” Xiao Zhan managed to tease, a little breathless with anticipation. 

Yibo leaned down and wrapped his lips slowly, carefully, around every inch of Xiao Zhan’s body. He found each curve, each edge, each dip, each bulge, and kissed it lovingly. Xiao Zhan gulped and his erection hardened unbearably as Yibo took his time kissing and licking his way down his long body. 

When he kissed his way around Xiao Zhan’s length, Xiao Zhan threw his head back, relishing the sweet torture, craving more. As he let out soft moans, Yibo’s kisses moved lower and lower, until he spread his legs wide and began rimming him.

“Fuck!” Xiao Zhan nearly shot up at the first contact.

In response, Yibo smirked and tongued him harder before inserting a wet finger inside his opening. As he began scissoring him open, Xiao Zhan grabbed his hair and pulled him up to him. Yibo’s eyes trailed over his sweaty body and relished the sight as he writhed under his touch. 

“Wang Yibo,” Xiao Zhan moaned helplessly when Yibo inserted a third finger and began prodding his spot. 

He massaged him exactly there over and over again until sweat was beading down Xiao Zhan’s face. 

“Yibo, get inside me _now_ ,” Xiao Zhan hissed in pleasure.

Yibo flipped Xiao Zhan onto his stomach without warning and grabbed him by the hips, pulling him up on all fours. Xiao Zhan yelped as Yibo manhandled him into place. His breath hitched when Yibo lined up with his opening and began entering him. 

Both men groaned as Yibo moved inside Xiao Zhan. Xiao Zhan fell onto the bed, clutching the sheets as Yibo rammed into him. 

“Fuck…more, Yibo…more…” Xiao Zhan moaned into the bed, arching his back and thrusting back into Yibo rhythmically. 

They moved as one and Yibo thrust faster and harder into Xiao Zhan. 

“It feels so good inside you,” Yibo groaned as he felt a surge of pleasure overwhelm him. 

“Yes! Yes!” Xiao Zhan goaded him on until he was a hot mess, coming with a final sensitive jolt. 

“I wanna come on you, ge,” Yibo panted heavily as he pulled out when Xiao Zhan was spent with his orgasm. 

He flipped Xiao Zhan onto his back and crawled up his body, working himself with his hand. Yibo brought his erection closer to his face and Xiao Zhan gazed at him with lidded eyes, tongue darting out for an occasional lick. 

Yibo breathed heavily as Xiao Zhan ran his hands down his body and locked eyes with him. As drops began falling on Xiao Zhan’s face, Yibo felt his orgasm rain down on him all at once. He painted Xiao Zhan’s face with his cum, coming with a long drawn out groan. 

When he fell forward, bracing himself on either side of Xiao Zhan, he watched as Xiao Zhan wiped strands of cum off his face and licked it, never once looking away. 

“Fuck…” Yibo let out a sigh when he recovered and fell to one side. 

“Looks like you’ve learnt a lot,” Xiao Zhan giggled and turned onto his side.

“Learnt from the best,” Yibo winked before capturing Xiao Zhan’s lips. 

Yibo deepened the kiss as their bodies entangled together. 

“We should take a shower,” Xiao Zhan managed to mutter between kisses. 

“Mn,” Yibo responded without letting go. “Together…”

“Fine,” Xiao Zhan chuckled. “Together.”

* * *

A few days later, as Yibo prepared to fly to the shoot of the Surf Shop show on which he was to be a guest, Xiao Zhan received a call from his manager. 

“Wei,” Xiao Zhan answered the call as he lay beside Yibo’s bag that was being packed. 

“What?” Xiao Zhan sat up. “When?”

Yibo glanced at him, pausing his folding. 

“Oh, he did? I hope he didn't get too much hate for it,” Xiao Zhan sighed. 

When the call ended, Yibo raised an eyebrow.

“All okay?”

“Meh,” Xiao Zhan shrugged. “My Esquire shoot won't make it to the cover.”

“The one they shot in March and had to postpone?”

“Yeah…someone leaked the shoot and now they are canning the whole thing.”

“Even the interview?!”

“Yeah…guess they were worried the antis would make things difficult for that issue.”

“That’s bullshi-” Yibo began raging but paused when he saw Xiao Zhan stare at his phone listlessly. 

Yibo sat beside Xiao Zhan and pulled him into an embrace. 

“It’s okay,” Xiao Zhan spoke against Yibo’s chest. “I’m okay.”

“Are you sure?” Yibo kissed the top of Xiao Zhan’s head. 

“Yeah,” he let out a long exhale and sat up straight, forcing a smile. “I’ll be fine. Plus, the photographer said some really nice things about me on his live apparently.”

Yibo cupped his face and planted a kiss on Xiao Zhan’s nose. Before he could say anything more, his phone pinged. Xiao Zhan resumed folding the clothes as Yibo attended to the text message.

“Who is it?” Xiao Zhan asked offhandedly as he packed. “And do you really wanna take this hoodie to a beach shack?” He rolled his eyes at the bulky sweatshirt Yibo had picked out. 

“Whatever you think, ge,” Yibo shrugged as he typed away. “It’s Elvis-ge.”

“Who?”

“Han Dongjun,” Yibo looked up and smiled. “He’s on the Surf Shop show too, he’s a regular cast member though.”

“Why is he texting you?” Xiao Zhan glanced at Yibo.

“He connected with me online because he likes bikes and skateboarding too,” Yibo beamed and showed Xiao Zhan his Weibo. “We’ll finally get to meet in person now!”

“That’s good,” Xiao Zhan smiled and zipped the bag. “Alright, all done.”

“Thanks, ge!” Yibo hugged Xiao Zhan from behind. 

Xiao Zhan turned around in his arms and hugged him back. 

“I’ll miss you,” Yibo sighed. 

“When will I see you next now?” Xiao Zhan feigned a disappointed pout. 

“I’ll be heading to Street Dance right after the Surf Shop but I can try and fly home between Street Dance and Being a Hero at the end of the month maybe?”

“Or maybe I could visit you?”

Yibo’s face lit up at Xiao Zhan’s words.

“Yeah, that would work too…you could come to the street dance set and maybe we could-”

Xiao Zhan smiled and cut Yibo’s excited rambling short by sealing their lips together. When he pulled back, he kissed Yibo’s nose and whispered.

“Anything you want, gouzaizai.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> with this chapter, we are now in mid-may 2020 in the timeline
> 
> xz leaked esquire photographer talks about him -  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tsgxUNy9xQ&ab_channel=FefeH
> 
> yibo and elvis on summer shop -  
> https://twitter.com/87Keyra/status/1278911707520413698?s=20


	266. I heard that you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. XZ's studio posted a video to celebrate their one year anniversary!! And they ADMITTED TO DOING KADIAN!!!!  
> https://twitter.com/ZhanGeBoDi/status/1310945073941696514?s=20
> 
> 2\. XZ posted a funny ass douyin for his debut anniversary. 4 years of xz!!!  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1310381322355916822?s=20
> 
> 3\. XIAO ZHAN ARMS. ENOUGH SAID.  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1310443506528219136?s=20

* * *

Yibo slung his bag on his back and picked up his skateboard and got out of the car. He had just arrived at the location of the beach shack where the participants of the variety show, Summer Surf Shop, were staying. 

The crew was filming his arrival and he tried his best to contain his nervousness of meeting everyone for the first time while cameras were recording. 

_This is so exciting!_ Yibo thought. _I can't believe I get to spend a few days relaxing by the beach for my job! This is such a good break before the craziness of my shooting schedule after this. If only Zhan-ge were here too...then this would be perfect._

When Yibo managed to shake the door open and enter the shack, the main cast was already outside, ready to greet him. One by one he greeted them - Huang Xuan, Bridgette, Justin and finally Elvis. 

With a broad smile, the well built man greeted Yibo and immediately ushered him inside. 

“I would like to thank the producers,” Elvis grinned once everyone had settled down with drinks in their hands. “I can finally meet Yibo now!”

“You two are familiar?” Bridgette asked.

“We are online friends,” he laughed and Yibo nodded along, taking another sip of his beer. 

After some fun games and more chatting over drinks, Yibo was finally given a tour of the shack. As a joke, Elvis called out to the production staff.

“Where’s the tent? I’ll sleep in the tent!”

“No!” Yibo laughed in embarrassment. “I can share the room with you,” he offered. 

Elvis beamed back at him and looked around, pleased with himself. When they finally bid everyone goodnight and turned in for the night, Yibo followed Elvis to their room.

“There are cameras in the rooms,” Elvis pointed to the two in their room, “but when we sleep we just cover them with our stuff,” he cackled and removed his shirt, dumping it on the camera. 

“Oh,” Yibo adjusted his cap and nodded, “umm...okay.”

“Which side of the bed do you prefer?” Elvis sat down on the bed with a huff. 

“I don’t have a preference, ge,” Yibo smiled politely.

“So you like both sides?” Elvis smirked suddenly and Yibo felt a shift in his tone of voice. 

“Huh?”

“Nothing,” Elvis chuckled to himself and began removing his shorts.

Yibo’s eyes widened slightly as he realized the man was disrobing down to his boxers. 

“Uhh,” Yibo cleared his throat and turned to his bag to retrieve his night clothes, “I think I’ll need to use the shower before sleeping.”

“Oh, good idea!” Elvis stood up and clapped his hands together, “we should shower.”

“We?” Yibo blurted.

“I mean…it’s not a big deal, right?” Elvis shrugged nonchalantly.

“I think…I’ll go after you,” Yibo tried replying as casually as possible. “You can go first, it’s okay.”

Elvis shrugged again and headed out. When he left, Yibo checked his phone and found a voice message from Xiao Zhan. 

_“Sometimes fans don’t realize that their actions make things worse.”_ Xiao Zhan rambled angrily _._

“Uh oh…what did they do now?” Yibo muttered to himself.

_“Some teachers who are my fans made a video with their school children…little young kids, Yibo! And made them say words of support for me. During school time! And of course the haters are just going to town with this! Saying I’m disrupting and corrupting them into following idols blindly!! I swear to god, I am going to make it crystal clear what I think it means to be a fan and what I do and don’t expect of my fans!!!”_

Yibo looked at the phone, distraught and helpless. 

_This is so...out of hand._ He thought. _This is not how it normally goes...so much hate for such a long time._

When Elvis returned, Yibo nearly choked as he saw the man walking in in just a towel. 

_What is his deal?!! Why is he always half naked around me!?!?_

Just as Yibo thought so, Elvis removed his towel, revealing his naked body. Yibo’s eyes boggled out of his head and he turned away immediately, unsure of what to say or do.

“Now I’ll get some proper sleep,” Elvis smiled and stretched as he pulled on his boxers. “You should shower too…the water’s nice and refreshing!”

All Yibo could do was nod and grab his clothes before heading out hurriedly. 

_Or maybe he’s just really comfortable with his body._ Yibo tried to reason with himself. _It’s been a while since I’ve stayed with other guys. Maybe he’s just a total bro dude type of guy._

When Yibo returned, Elvis looked up from his phone and flashed him a smile. 

“You look much better now…not as tired,” he commented.

“Did I look tired?” Yibo raised an eyebrow as he got into his side of the bed.

“Yeah…but it’s understandable I guess.”

“Why is it _understandable_?” Yibo paused and looked at Elvis.

“Well, you know…your schedule is crazy from what I hear,” Elvis sat up and faced Yibo. “And with everything else…” he hesitated and paused. 

“What else?” Yibo narrowed his eyes. 

“Okay, this may not be my place and I may be completely wrong but I heard that you…”

“That you’re going through a breakup…” 

“What?!?” Yibo blurted and his jaw flew open.

“And there’s more,” Elvis lowered his voice. “I heard that there’s some beef between you and Xiao Zhan and that his fans are blaming you and Yuehua…”

“Blaming us for?” Yibo managed to ask as his mind reeled. 

“For stoking the hate fire that’s been exploding in the poor man’s face,” Elvis shook his head and clucked his tongue sadly. “I don't know him personally but man! That’s some nasty shit he’s stuck in right now-”

“I need to make a quick call,” Yibo muttered and left the room with no further explanation.

He stepped out and immediately looked around to make sure no crew member was lurking around the shack and then called Xiao Zhan. 

“Hey,” Xiao Zhan answered, looking very tired.

“Hi,” Yibo looked at him worriedly, momentarily forgetting everything Elvis had said. “What happened? You seem out of it.”

“I’m sick of this,” Xiao Zhan sighed. “Sick of more and more bad news everyday. Anyway, enough about me,” Xiao Zhan let out a long exhale. “How are things with you? How’s everyone there? Anything interesting happening?”

Yibo took one long look at Xiao Zhan and made up his mind. 

“No,” he tried to flash a smile and shook his head. “Just missed you.”

“I miss you too,” Xiao Zhan smiled tiredly and leaned against the pillow.

A few minutes later, when Yibo ended the call and went back inside, Elvis looked at him in confusion. 

“Did I say something wrong?” He sat up straight and looked at Yibo innocently. “I have a big mouth…sorry if I said-”

“It’s okay, ge…it’s good that you said all that otherwise I would have never known about all this shit going around about me.”

“So is any of it true? Are you okay?”

Yibo sat down with a sigh and lowered his head as he thought of how to answer that simple question. 

_Am I okay? How can I be okay when everything is still so confusing for Zhan-ge._

“Wait,” Yibo thought out loud, “you heard about me breaking up?”

“Oh,” Elvis scooched closer and sat beside Yibo, placing a hand on his thigh, “yeah, man. It’s okay. Breakups suck. You can talk to me if you want. Any time!”

Yibo curled his lips inward and resisted the urge to laugh. 

_I haven't broken up but if Zhan-ge were here, he would probably break your hands for touching me._

“Umm…that’s very nice of you, ge,” Yibo carefully extracted his leg from under Elvis’ hand. “But none of these rumors are true. I didn't have anything to do with Zhan-ge’s scandal…and I…am still very much happily committed to someone.”

“Oh,” Elvis replied, visibly startled. “I-I’m sorry…I shouldn't have-shouldn't have said anything,” he began stuttering. 

“It’s okay, I think I’ll turn in now,” Yibo suppressed a chuckle, “It’s getting late and I wanna surf first thing in the morning!”

“Sure thing!” Elvis beamed and bumped Yibo’s shoulder with his.

Yibo crawled to his side of the bed and lay down, straight as an arrow, making sure to be fully covered by the blanket and keep a respectful distance from Elvis. 

_Just in case he gets the wrong idea. And in case the crew decides to come in tomorrow morning to film us waking up! Never know with these shows._

He pulled out his phone and left Xiao Zhan one last message and then scrolled through their cp topic from his private account.

_I can't believe there are rumors that we aren’t together. Is it because I haven't said anything for Zhan-ge? Or because they haven't seen us together in a long time? Or maybe because of Weibo night?_

As Yibo browsed the topic, his heart sank when he saw some posts talk about how happy he looked in his show appearances on TTXS. 

_It’s my job! What am I supposed to do? Cry on screen!? Say I don't want to shoot because my fiance is going through the worst phase of his life so far!?_

He stilled a little when he saw a few posts blaming Yuehua for the whole 227 fiasco and attacking Yibo for taking advantage of Xiao Zhan’s scandal. 

_Should have known someone or the other would say something about me sooner or later._

With a frustrated grunt, he put his phone aside. 

_They think I’m not with Zhan-ge any more!? I’ll show them. They want some kind of proof!? I’ll give them so many candies, they’ll flail and not know what to do with them._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we all know what happened next lol - yibo and his candy deluge over the course of the last few months haha!
> 
> also, we are now in mid-may in the story's timeline.


	267. I just felt like showing it off

* * *

Xiao Zhan woke up to several photos and videos from Yibo enjoying the surf and sand. He smiled fondly as he swiped through everything the enthusiastic boy had sent. Suddenly, his smile turned into a frown. 

_This person is getting awfully close to Yibo while taking these pics and videos._ Xiao Zhan knit his eyebrows unknowingly as the person holding the camera splashed Yibo playfully and shoved the camera in his face. _Who is this guy!?_

> _Xiao Zhan: That looks like a lot of fun, Bo-di!  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Except for the man getting too close to my fiance  
>    
>  Yibo: That’s just Elvis-ge _😂 _  
>   
>  Yibo: He’s very friendly  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: I don't like it  
>    
>  Yibo: Don’t worry, sweetheart _😘 _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Do I see the ox necklace back out?!  
>    
>  Yibo: Yes! I just felt like showing it off _😄 _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: So you’re wearing it in the ocean!?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: What if it falls off?  
>    
>  Yibo: I’ll be careful…  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Yibo? What is going on? Why are you risking losing the ox necklace? _

Xiao Zhan watched as Yibo typed and paused and then typed again before finally stopping. No message came through. A few seconds later, however, he received a call from Yibo. 

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan answered and waited.

“I didn't want to tell you this earlier because you were upset about the whole school thing,” Yibo began, “but there were…rumors…about us.”

“What?”

“Rumors that we’ve broken up and rumors that I am part of the hate campaign against you,” Yibo sighed and mumbled. 

Xiao Zhan stilled and then puffed his cheeks before letting out a long sigh. 

“And you didn't tell me this because…”

“I just…didn’t want to upset you more.”

“I’m sick of people thinking they need to protect me and treat me like some fragile object right now,” Xiao Zhan spoke calmly even as he frowned. “Promise me you won't do this again.”

“Okay…I promise…sorry…” Yibo replied softly.

“And you’re wearing the necklace to show the cp fans that we’re still together?” A small smile graced Xiao Zhan’s face and he shook his head fondly. 

“Mn…I can't bear the thought that anyone who believes we are real can think of us as broken up,” Xiao Zhan could hear the pout in Yibo’s voice. 

“Ayaa,” Xiao Zhan chuckled before suddenly remembering the other thing that had bothered him. 

“And what is the deal with this Elvis!?” Xiao Zhan scowled. “He’s getting awfully comfortable with you…”

“Ge!” Yibo laughed. “But full disclosure…we are sharing a room…don’t be mad!” 

“What?!!?” Xiao Zhan shot up all of a sudden and exclaimed. “And you’re okay with that?”

“I was…I mean I am…but he’s kinda…too friendly,” Yibo chuckled nervously. “But he’s _not_ hitting on me, baobao.”

“Why does that not sound convincing!?”

“Come on, ge,” Yibo spoke softly, voice filled with affection. “Don’t worry…and I think Xin-jie has a crush on him…”

“But who does he have a crush on?” Xiao Zhan asked in a mildly annoyed tone. 

“Ge! Don’t be like this,” Yibo exclaimed with a gentle laugh. “All that matters is who I have a crush on!”

“Oh yeah?” Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes. “And who’s that?” He asked dryly. 

“You. Always,” Yibo spoke gently, causing Xiao Zhan’s heart to flutter. 

“Yeah?” Xiao Zhan grinned a little.

“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan could hear the smile in Yibo’s voice. “And I won’t do anything to upset my crush.”

“Mn,” Xiao Zhan suppressed his smile and nodded. “Fine!” He rolled his eyes. “I won't be jealous!”

“Good baobao,” Yibo replied. “Okay, I have to go now, ge…I love you!”

“I love you too,” Xiao Zhan sighed and then ended the call. 

A few hours later, he received more excited messages from Yibo along with a drone shot of him riding a jet ski. 

> _Yibo: I RODE A JET SKI, GE!!  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: I can see that! Is that a…heart sign in the water!?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Did you make that with the jetski!? _😮 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Yes!!!! I asked the production staff to share the photo with me asap because I wanted to show it to you!!! I made it for you, ge!! _😘 _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Awww _🥰😘 _  
>   
>  Yibo: I wish I could have written ‘Xiao Zhan, wo ai ni’  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Wo ye ai ni, gouzaizai  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: You make me feel so special  
>    
>  Yibo: Anything for my cute bunny  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: _😘😘😘 

* * *

The next day, Yibo continued sending Xiao Zhan photos of him dressing up for the costume party. He tried on several costumes and went into the room for each one to check himself out in the mirror and take snaps to send Xiao Zhan. 

> _Yibo: How do I look, ge?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Ridiculous!_😛 _  
>   
>  Yibo: Don’t I look handsome?_☹️ _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Always, sweetie…no matter what you’re wearing  
>    
>  Yibo: Help me pick! I need to wear a costume to the surfing party tonight!  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: I like this one  
>    
>  Yibo: The caveman one?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Yep! My hot caveman…how can someone look sexy in that ridiculous getup!  
>    
>  Yibo: Sexy, huh?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: SO sexy  
>    
>  Yibo: How sexy?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: So sexy I wanna suck your dick right now  
>    
>  Yibo: Fuck  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: I wanna lick it so bad  
>    
>  Yibo: Ge…I’m not alone right now  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Then go to the bathroom  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Because I wanna wrap my lips around your big fucking thick dick  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: And suck on it like a fucking lollipop  
>    
>  Yibo: Fuck…ge…hold on…  
>    
>  _

Xiao Zhan smirked when a mere five seconds later, Yibo called him over video., huffing as if he had rushed to the bathroom. He yanked his clothes off and answered the call, bringing the camera close to his face so that only his lips were seen. 

“Fuck,” Yibo hissed when the video turned on and all that could be seen were Xiao Zhan’s plump, wet, shiny lips.

Xiao Zhan darted his tongue out and licked his lips and then bit down on the lower lip seductively. 

“Do you miss my lips?” Xiao Zhan whispered.

“So much,” Yibo yanked his shorts down and caught hold of his already partially erect dick. “So fucking much.”

“Do you miss my neck?” Xiao Zhan spoke in a sultry tone as he moved the camera lower down the expanse of his slender neck and throat. 

“Yes,” Yibo stroked himself hurriedly as he lusted after the caramel skin on full display in front of him. “I fucking love your neck…I love biting it…I love sucking hickies onto it.”

“Do you miss my chest?” Xiao Zhan continued moving the camera down the trail of his body and stopped in front of his nipples.

“Fuck,” Yibo hissed as he began tugging at himself feverishly, “yes…your chest is so toned…and so hot…god I wanna lick you right now,” he grunted. 

“Mmm,” Xiao Zhan moaned and it was only then that Yibo noticed Xiao Zhan’s other hand that had disappeared somewhere at the bottom of the frame, lost in between his lanky legs.

“Do you miss my thin waist?” Xiao Zhan lay back and angled the camera to his narrow torso as he stroked himself hard and fast.

Yibo growled as he eyed Xiao Zhan’s naked body sprawled on their bed. All he wanted in that moment was to wrap his big hands around Xiao Zhan’s tiny waist and dig into the soft skin. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” Yibo spoke breathlessly in a low voice as he stroked himself to his climax. 

“Do you miss this?” Xiao Zhan turned the camera down to his leaking erection as his hand worked it furiously. “Because it misses you…”

“Fuck,” Yibo licked his lips in lieu of licking the hardness on his phone screen. “I miss it too…”

Xiao Zhan moved the camera up and down his body a few more times as he tugged at his length, moaning and writhing, throwing his head back as he hummed Yibo’s name. Eventually, he let the camera stay on his face and he looked at Yibo who eyed him hungrily. 

“Zhan-ge,” Yibo choked on his words as Xiao Zhan watched him, eyes half lidded, biting down on his lower lip, moaning softly as his hand worked frantically. 

“Yibo,” Xiao Zhan whispered in a way that was enough to send Yibo over the edge finally. “Fuck…Yibo…I…ahhh,” he groaned as he followed Yibo immediately after and came gushing into his hand. 

“Fuck…” Yibo huffed and leaned back against the bathroom wall, sweat dripping down his temples. 

Xiao Zhan let out a breathy laugh and watched as Yibo cleaned himself before straightening his caveman robes. 

“That was hot,” Xiao Zhan muttered, thoroughly spent and satisfied. 

Both stared at each other through their screens with wide smiles on their faces. 

“ _You_ are hot.” Yibo shook his head and smirked. “And crazy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yibo jet ski heart in water -  
> https://twitter.com/_chyam_cp/status/1274282061650526213?s=20
> 
> ox necklace resurfaced (in full visibility) this year on this show -  
> https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EdUYfTvWAAIBQlJ.jpg
> 
> other candies/moments in the show -  
> https://twitter.com/BjyxObsessed/status/1282312832214880257?s=20
> 
> * * *
> 
> **UPDATE: i am busy with my final month of grad school and will be slow to update this fic till the end of oct. please subscribe so you can get a notification when i update. thanks for your patience!**


	268. Anything for you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> how's everyone been!? in case anyone missed it in the end notes for the last chapter, i am busy with grad school finals which is why i haven't posted in two weeks! thank you for your patience! i have another week or so of my finals and then i will be free! wish me luck!
> 
> in this time, three major things happened - XZ's birthday, the barrage of bts clips from the untamed, and Yibo's race!!! ACKKKKK! so many feels for both esp the photos and videos XZ studio released!!! my heart!!
> 
> note: we are now at may 19, 2020 in our timeline.

* * *

> _Zhan-ge: Have you left?  
>    
>  Yibo: Yeah, will board my flight to Shanghai soon  
>    
>  Yibo: But I’m gonna miss this beach shack  
>    
>  Yibo: These were the most relaxing few days_🙁 _  
>   
>  Yibo: But I’ll see you soon in Shanghai, right?! When’s your flight?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: About that…  
>    
>  Yibo: Wait…no…are you cancelling your Shanghai trip?!!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: My flight details got leaked  
>    
>  Yibo: Oh…that sucks!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: And it’s still too messy with the scandal and everything  
>    
>  Yibo: I understand, ge…it’s okay…  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Which is why I’ll drive instead  
>    
>  Yibo: What?! That’s more than 12 hours, ge!  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: It’s okay…I want to see you  
>    
>  Yibo: It’s fine, ge…you don't need to drive for so long  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I want to spend 520 with you  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Plus, it’s not like I have anything else to do in Beijing  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: I’ll explore Shanghai while you’re busy  
>    
>  Yibo: Are you sure?  
>    
>  Zhan-ge: Yes, sweetie…_😘😘😘 _  
>   
>  Zhan-ge: Have a safe flight, I’ll see you tonight! _

Yibo smiled wide as he closed the chat. He sighed as he looked at the group chat with the summer surf shop that he had been added to and swiped through the remaining photos and videos they had shared. 

_If only our lives were this simple. Just Zhan-ge and me, relaxing at the beach everyday. He could manage the shack and I could teach people surfing. What a simple life it would be! Far away from all this chaos._

Yibo tucked the phone in his jacket when his staff told him it was time to board. As he dozed off for the rest of the plane ride, his last thoughts were of the sun, surf, and sand and walking hand in hand with his Xiao Zhan.

* * *

On landing in Shanghai, Yibo’s manager herded him straight to his hotel as she recanted his entire itinerary for the remaining week.

“You’ll be dividing your time between the tracks and the start of SDOC,” she rattled on as they hurried to his next destination.

Yibo smiled inwardly at how much he had fought with his management over having a motorbiking career. He had had to convince them that it wouldn't interfere with his entertainment career and that he would not be in any danger. He had fought them tooth and nail for letting him participate in this year’s season. 

Even though he still wasn’t sure what the season would look like given covid, he was going to make sure that he was ready. And that meant, training every chance he got. He was already not expected to win given that he didn't have as much time as the other racers to train. And he knew some of them felt that he was doing this as a vanity project and thought of him as an idol and not a racer. 

But Yibo was determined if nothing else. He would work his ass off just as he did with everything else he went after and show them that he was worthy of their respect and that he was good enough to win. Despite the hectic schedule, the steep learning curve, the accidents, the injuries, he was still pushing himself for the title that he knew would one day be his.

“And you’ll be meeting the other dance captains tomorrow,” Yibo’s manager continued.

“Wait, tomorrow? I thought that was the day after,” Yibo snapped back into the present. “I’ll be spending time with Zhan-ge today and tomorrow.”

“No, shooting starts the day after, but everyone is meeting on set tomorrow and there’s a dinner planned.”

“Oh, okay…” Yibo trailed off. _Maybe Zhan-ge could meet them all too._

“Who’s the fourth captain again?”

“Apart from you, Jackson, Lay, there’s Wallace,” she reminded him. 

“I don't think I’ve ever met him before, have I?” Yibo bit his lips. “What do you think?”

“What do I think about what?”

“About Zhan-ge meeting them…he knows Yixing-ge, and I know Jiaer-ge is cool…”

“Yibo…” the manager began in a surprised tone, “are you being serious? It’s not a good idea for you two to be anywhere together-”

“Zhan-ge is okay with being an open secret in the industry circle,” Yibo reminded her. “I’m not going to hide him in the hotel room the entire time.” He stated with finality. 

Seeing that there was no room for argument, the manager sighed and then glanced around before leaning in and whispering. 

“He’s safe,” she answered quickly.

Yibo waited for her to say more and she eventually rolled her eyes when he didn't follow. 

“He’s gay too.”

“Oh! Really? How do you know that?”

“It’s not a secret within the industry.”

Before Yibo could ask more, he was at the tracks for a day of practise. 

_I get to spend all day on the tracks! And then I’ll see Zhan-ge at the end of the day! We can figure out how to introduce him to everyone and what story to make up for tomorrow’s meeting._ Yibo thought excitedly as he suited up. _This is one more step closer to the life we want for ourselves. Us, together, in every way possible._

* * *

When Xiao Zhan heard from Yibo next, he had just ended a very important phone call with his lawyer. Yibo seemed very excited over text as he recounted his day at the track. Xiao Zhan gave a silent thanks for his safety and read in amusement when Yibo said he had some very important news to share with him when he got to Shanghai. 

_Still a few more hours._ Xiao Zhan stretched in his seat and yawned. _The things we do for love. Once my schedule gets back to normal, how are we going to keep this up?_ His mind thought involuntarily. 

Xiao Zhan felt a slight deflation at the thought of his work schedule. He had no idea when it would go back to normal, when his dramas would air, when he would get confirmed for new dramas, when he would act again.

His phone call with his lawyers had shaken him. It had turned out that the hate coming his way hadn't been all too random and coincidental. After a certain point, the initial hate had turned into a targeted attack on him and his fast rising career. He had felt his spirits sink at the news that there was a group of people who hated him enough to make actual attempts to end his career.

But he would not think about that. He would focus only on his time with Yibo, on his time in Shanghai where he wanted to see some cultural spots from a book he was reading, and then on the variety show he had been invited on that he would head to next to shoot. He would be happy with the time he had been given as a result of the hate campaign - time to spend with his loved ones, time to follow his interests and hobbies, time to learn and grow in new ways. And he would patiently follow the slow path his team was laying out for his comeback into the limelight, one step at a time. 

* * *

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo flung the hotel room door open and exclaimed happily on seeing Xiao Zhan waiting on the other side. 

Xiao Zhan walked in with arms wide open and cradled Yibo in them, grinning and letting out a long exhale at having finally made it to Shanghai. 

“I missed you,” Yibo whispered as they embraced tightly in the hallway.

“I missed you too, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan held Yibo closer and sighed. “I’m so glad you can spend time with me tomorrow.”

“About that,” Yibo pulled back and grinned sheepishly, “I have a meeting with the captains in the morning and then a dinner with them.”

“Oh,” Xiao Zhan frowned before shrugging, “it’s…it’s okay, we can spend time in between and-”

“Will you join us for dinner? It’s just going to be the captains…no filming! Filming begins the day after.” 

“Are you sure you want me to?”

“Yes, I think we can trust this group,” Yibo nodded excitedly. 

“I mean, we don’t have to announce that we are involved and engaged,” Xiao Zhan reminded Yibo. “If it’s okay for me to just come as a friend…”

“We can be _just friends_ tomorrow, Zhan-ge,” Yibo winked and smirked.

“There’s an idea,” Xiao Zhan smiled and shook his head fondly. “But first, kiss me.”

They leaned forward and Xiao Zhan enveloped Yibo’s lips. Yibo sighed into the kiss and wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan, pressing his body closer. 

“So you’ll join us tomorrow?” Yibo asked softly when he finally pulled back. 

“Anything for you,” Xiao Zhan brushed aside a strand of hair from his forehead. “Anything for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disclaimer! wallace is not known to be out of the closet in real life. this is fiction and for the sake of my plot. 
> 
> p.s. - other things i wrote in this meantime:  
> 1\. a new short fic for xz’s birthday - [we are made to love](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26823535).  
> 2\. another short mildly angsty one shot yizhan - [you didn’t make it easy](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26861668)


	269. If that's how you want to play  it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XIAO ZHAN POSTED MORE GYM PICS ON OASIS -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1317512501479657473?s=20
> 
> AND THEN POSTED THIS DOUYIN -  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1317525989744734209?s=20
> 
> LMAO I STAN THIS MAN YES I DO!!!

* * *

When Xiao Zhan woke up, Yibo was, as usual, splayed across him. He smiled to himself and rubbed his eyes as he woke up slowly. As he stretched carefully, Yibo stirred as well and opened his eyes.

“Zhan-ge…” Yibo murmured, puffing a short breath against Xiao Zhan’s neck.

“Bo-ge…” Xiao Zhan teased back.

“Zhan-ge…you’re really here…” Yibo whispered as he cuddled closer and tighter.

Xiao Zhan’s heart did a flip. Yibo’s words made him think of how many times he must have woken up from a dream of them together, only to realize he was alone in a hotel bed in another city far away. Xiao Zhan’s heart clenched because he knew the feeling well. 

_No more. As much as possible, we are going to reduce the long distance and time apart._ Xiao Zhan thought dreamily through his morning haze. 

“Yes, I am, _Bo-ge,_ ” Xiao Zhan smirked and repeated. 

“Mmm,” Yibo drawled sleepily and kissed Xiao Zhan’s neck. 

“You have your first meeting with the cast and crew of SDOC in the morning, Bo-ge,” Xiao Zhan kissed Yibo’s head with a chuckle.

“Call me Bo-ge one more time and we’ll be fucking next,” Yibo spoke in a fully awake voice suddenly as he raised his head and eyed Xiao Zhan with a glint of mischief. 

“As much as I’d like that, _Bo-ge,_ ” Xiao Zhan’s smirk widened, “you have to leave soon.”

Yibo sat up with a grunt and got on top of Xiao Zhan. He hovered over his lips and rolled his hips against Xiao Zhan, prompting him to groan. 

“But Bo-ge is hard,” Yibo kissed Xiao Zhan’s mole.

“So is Zhan-ge, but Bo-ge needs to go to work. We can’t both be jobless,” Xiao Zhan grinned. 

“But Bo-ge is hungry,” Yibo pouted playfully and kissed his way down Xiao Zhan’s neck. 

“Then have breakfast,” Xiao Zhan wriggled out from underneath Yibo with a laugh. “I’ll order room service. Now go get ready!”

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo sat up in shock before launching himself at Xiao Zhan who laughed and dodged him.

“Hello, yes room service?” Xiao Zhan spoke into the phone while gesturing for Yibo to quieten down. 

Yibo poked his tongue out but conceded and walked up to Xiao Zhan for a hug as Xiao Zhan placed an order for their breakfast, occasionally planting soft kisses on Xiao Zhan’s collarbone.

“So what are you going to do today while I’m out?” Yibo asked when Xiao Zhan was done. 

“I’m going to walk around Shanghai with my team. They want to shoot a vlog and I want to visit some spots that are mentioned in this book I’m reading!” Xiao Zhan beamed excitedly. 

“I’m in love with a geek,” Yibo smiled fondly and kissed Xiao Zhan’s chin. 

“As if you aren’t one Mr. I geek-out-over-bikes-and-legos-and-skateboard-parts,” Xiao Zhan kissed Yibo’s nose and countered. “Now go get ready or you’ll be late.”

“Fair point,” Yibo nodded and then grabbed his clothes to hurry in for a shower. 

* * *

Yibo took in a deep breath and entered the room. 

_Another new show, another new set of people. But this is my field. Street dance. Yixing-ge is the only person I know well here but this is my tribe of people. I can't wait to shoot this show! And ever since Zhan-ge entered my life, somehow I find it easier to open up to people quicker!_

As soon as Yibo entered, everyone’s heads turned to him. 

“Wang Yibo!!” Yixing erupted into a smile and made his way over to him to greet him with a hug. 

“Yixing-ge,” Yibo nodded and hugged him back with a wide smile of his own. 

“The last time I saw you was at Weibo night!” Yixing exclaimed. 

“Hmm,” Yibo nodded as he recalled the night.

_Stupid management telling Zhan-ge and me to keep our distance with each other._ Yibo couldn't help but sulk at the thought of his last public appearance with Xiao Zhan.

“Come! Meet everyone,” Yixing led Yibo to the group that included the directors, the producers, and the remaining captains. 

After bowing and greeting everyone, Yibo shook hands with Jackson Wang and Wallace Chung.

“Jiaer-ge,” Yibo smiled, “Liang-ge,” he bowed respectfully. 

“Wow, you really are well mannered,” Wallace chuckled and patted Yibo on the shoulder. 

“Nice to see you again,” Jackson grinned and bowed back playfully. “The last time we met was also Weibo night.”

“Oh,” Yibo tried to crack his brain to remember but all he could recollect from that night was how sexy Xiao Zhan looked in a suit and when he thought Xiao Zhan would be angry over his interaction with Yixing. 

“It’s okay if you can’t remember,” Jackson laughed and dismissed Yibo’s embarrassment with a wave of his hand. “It’s cool, bro!”

As the meeting commenced, Yibo grew excited the more he learnt about the show and its format and his role as a captain. Although several parts were more complicated than they needed to be, by the end of their meeting, Yibo was pumped up to begin the shoot. 

“So, we’ll see you at dinner tonight? Or is the popular Wang Yibo too busy?” Yixing winked with a grin. 

“I’ll be there…also, actually…umm…” Yibo began hesitantly, “turns out a friend of mine from a previous drama is in town.”

“Oh, who?”

“You know him…Xiao Zhan. I was thinking-”

“Oh, Xiao Zhan is in town!?” Yixing exclaimed loudly enough that the other conversations halted and everyone’s attention was now on them. “Of course I know Zhan-Zhan! We must invite him for dinner too! It’ll be great to see him after so long!”

“Oh, I’ve never met Xiao Zhan,” Wallace said as he and Jackson joined Yixing and Yibo. “I have heard so much about him. It would be nice to meet him!”

“I’m glad he’s out and about despite all the shit he’s getting,” Jackson blurted in true candid style. 

“Zhan-ge is above all the hate,” Yibo replied, before he could stop himself, with more protectiveness in his tone than he had intended on having. 

“It’s unfortunate what happened,” Wallace added with a polite, diplomatic smile. 

“Yes, none of it was his fault,” Yibo found that he couldn’t stop talking now that he had found a group where he could speak his mind over Xiao Zhan’s scandal. “He doesn’t deserve any of the hate that’s being thrown his way!!”

“Hey, he _will_ get through this,” Yixing squeezed Yibo’s shoulder to calm him down. “And he’s lucky to have friends like you by his side.”

“Mn,” Yibo nodded. “He’s like family.”

“Oh, that’s…that’s nice…you two must have gotten really close when filming the drama,” Yixing gave Yibo a reassuring smile and the conversation moved on. 

_You have no idea, ge._ Yibo curled his lips inward to suppress a smirk. _You have no fucking idea._

* * *

Xiao Zhan reviewed the photos and videos his team had taken as he drove back to the hotel. During the day, when Yibo had been busy, he had been travelling through Shanghai and cherishing the anonymity with which he was able to make his way to the spots he wanted to see. 

_No one expects to see me in Shanghai and out and about at this moment._

When he reached the hotel, Yibo was already waiting for him.

“Hey,” Yibo smiled when Xiao Zhan entered the room. 

“Hi,” Xiao Zhan embraced him and stayed in his arms.

“How was Shanghai?”

“Beautiful…I walked down Wukang Road and saw all the spots on my list, and found a cute little cafe, and met a cat…it was fun.” 

Xiao Zhan’s phone pinged just then and he opened the chat. 

“So are you still coming for our dinner tonight?” Yibo asked. “I told Yixing-ge this morning and mentioned that you are in town and before I could even ask if you could come, he was like we should totally invite you.”

“Oh,” Xiao Zhan glanced up from his phone, “that explains the text I got from him,” he grinned. “Looks like I’m coming as Yixing’s guest.”

“No, you’re coming with me,” Yibo frowned, a little confused.

“No, Yixing invited me and oh look,” Xiao Zhan showed Yibo his phone, “I just said yes to him instead. Looks like I’m going with him. But I’ll see you there as ‘ _just friends’_ , right?”

Yibo stood with both hands on his hips as he eyed Xiao Zhan’s smug expression. 

“Okay, Zhan-ge…if that’s how you want to play it. I’ll see you at dinner as just friends.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The xz studio vlog that came out later -  
> https://twitter.com/38jiejie/status/1292816474155950082 
> 
> Also, is anyone here interested in a [Baoshan Sanren/Lan Yi one shot](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27088465)!? 👉👈


	270. Let's play the game

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finished my other fic - [ Love thy neighbour](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26408098)!
> 
> Also, if anyone here is interested in a [Baoshan Sanren/Lan Yi one shot](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27088465), I wrote one! 👉👈

* * *

When Yibo walked into the restaurant, Wallace and Jackson were already at the reserved table for them. 

_Where’s Zhan-ge?_ Yibo glanced around. _He said Yixing-ge already picked him up._

He couldn't help the frown that came on his face at the thought of Yixing getting to enter the restaurant with Xiao Zhan instead of him. 

“Ah, Yibo! Glad you could join us!” Wallace welcomed him as Yibo walked over. “You look worried. Everything okay?”

“Yeah…just wondering where Yixing-ge is-”

Just then, the sound of a familiar giggle erupted in the distance and Yibo turned around with hopeful eyes. Sure enough, in walked Xiao Zhan, laughing merrily beside Yixing.

“There they are!” Jackson exclaimed as the duo made their way to the table. 

Xiao Zhan glanced at Yibo before nodding and bowing at Jackson and Wallace.

“Lao Wang!” Xiao Zhan beamed at Yibo after. “Nice to see you!”

Yibo bit his smirk as Xiao Zhan clasped hands with him and bumped shoulders. 

_He’s really going for the ‘just friends’ sham, huh!?_ Yibo suppressed his urge to laugh out loud. 

“Let’s see who cracks first,” Xiao Zhan whispered in Yibo’s ear before pulling away from the half hug. 

Yibo’s eyebrows shot up on hearing the words.

_Oh. Looks like it’s game on, Zhan-ge._

“Xiao Zhan, so nice you could join us!” Wallace welcomed Xiao Zhan to the table and greeted him with a kind smile. 

“Sorry for intruding on your captain’s dinner,” Xiao Zhan smiled sheepishly and bowed once more. 

“No, man!” Jackson chimed in. “I’m glad you could join us! Yixing hasn’t stopped talking about you since we found out you were in town!”

“He hasn't?” Yibo piped up.

“He has been texting me constantly about how amazing Xiao Zhan is and how he’s excited for everybody to meet him,” Jackson nudged Yixing playfully.

“Oh, okay,” Yibo mumbled. _That should have been me! Introducing everyone to Zhan-ge and-_

Yibo’s thoughts derailed when everyone began taking their seats at the table and Yixing led Xiao Zhan by the wrist and made him sit between him and Jackson. Before he could protest or figure out a way to change the seating, Wallace had already gestured to the seat beside him. 

As Yibo sat opposite Xiao Zhan and beside Wallace, he did his best to rein in his grumpiness at not getting to sit next to Xiao Zhan. But he must have failed because he felt a swift kick to his foot under the table and looked up to see a grinning Xiao Zhan raising an eyebrow at him. 

“What’s the matter, Lao Wang? You look preoccupied.” Xiao Zhan teased. 

“No-nothing, Zhan-ge,” Yibo recovered and smoothed his expression. 

_I am not going to crack first._

* * *

As dinner progressed, however, Yibo found it harder and harder to not crack. It didn't make it easier that Yixing was fawning over Xiao Zhan or that all of Xiao Zhan’s spare attention was taken up by Jackson. At one point, when Yixing spoon fed Xiao Zhan a bite from his plate, Yibo nearly kicked Xiao Zhan back under the table. It also didn't help that the baiju was flowing freely and everyone was a few glasses down including Xiao Zhan who was on his second glass and was already tipsy.

“So!” Jackson piped up suddenly. “Tell us more about how it was working with THE Wang Yibo!” He cackled. “I’ve only heard of how quiet and cold and aloof he is.”

“Not this again!” Yibo muttered to himself before rushing to his own defense. “I’m not-”

“Yibo is far from any of those things,” Xiao Zhan beat him to it, “he just takes time to open up to people.”

Yibo smiled gratefully at his fiance.

“But once he does,” Xiao Zhan smirked and added, “he is completely crazy!”

“Zhan-ge!!” Yibo attempted to kick Xiao Zhan under the table but Xiao Zhan had already moved his legs out of the way and gloated with another smug smile. 

“Wow, I did not expect that!” Jackson’s eyes widened. “This should be fun!”

“And Yibo is in his element with this show,” Xiao Zhan went on, “so he should feel right at home and get comfortable soon. Right?” He looked at Yibo.

“Mn, I’m looking forward to it,” Yibo nodded with a small smile.

“Here’s to starting a new show and here’s to dancing!” Jackson raised his glass and cheered.

After everyone clinked glasses to his toast and had another sip, Yixing eyed Yibo and then Xiao Zhan and spoke next.

“Tell us something,” Yixing began slowly, speech slightly slurred thanks to the alcohol, “you guys are still good friends…does it get uncomfortable with your cp being so big and so many people thinking you’re together!?”

Yibo and Xiao Zhan nearly choked over their drinks and Wallace immediately patted Yibo’s back.

“Are you okay?” Wallace checked with Yibo.

“Mhmm,” Yibo nodded as he coughed.

“Well,” Xiao Zhan recovered first, “it’s…uhh…it’s definitely harder for us to interact in public.”

“Ah, that must suck,” Jackson.

“Yeah, it does!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed loudly and pouted.

_Oh no._ Yibo thought. _Is he drunk?_

“I need to use the restroom,” Xiao Zhan stood up suddenly and eyed Yibo before bowing and walking away from the table. 

A few seconds later, Yibo stood up as well.

“I’ll be back in a bit,” he excused himself, thankful that the rest of the captains were too engrossed in their conversation to ask him anything more. 

He navigated to the washroom and as soon as he entered it, he was pulled inside and the door was shut.

“Finally!” Xiao Zhan pressed Yibo against the door and smirked. “I’ve been waiting.”

“I wanted to check on you, are you drunk?” Yibo looked at Xiao Zhan carefully and brushed a stray strand of hair aside.

Instead of replying, Xiao Zhan swooped in and enveloped Yibo’s lips.

“Been dying to kiss you,” he murmured between kisses.

“Me too,” Yibo breathed.

They kissed for several seconds, hands roaming each other’s hair and clothes, messing both up completely. When they finally apart, Yibo smiled.

“You _are_ drunk,” he smirked.

“A little,” Xiao Zhan giggled.

“You get clingy when you’re drunk,” Yibo spoke fondly and kissed Xiao Zhan’s nose. “And we have to act as friends, remember?”

“I remember…I’m not cracking first,” Xiao Zhan shook his head and gave him a smug look.

“You could barely resist kissing me for an hour,” Yibo grinned.

“Oh, please…like you weren’t dying to,” Xiao Zhan played with Yibo’s collar and rolled his eyes.

“Fine…I was…I’m dying to do more too,” Yibo whispered and bit Xiao Zhan’s lower lip.

Just then, the door knob turned and Yibo felt the door try to open. They straightened their hair and clothes immediately and unlocked the door before stepping away pretending to wash their hands.

“That’s weird, the door seemed stuck,” a familiar voice spoke.

Jackson walked in and paused when he saw Xiao Zhan and Yibo washing their hands. 

“Yeah, that door is weird,” Xiao Zhan covered for the awkwardness and dried his hands first. “Anyway, I’ll see you back at the table.”

With those words and a quick bow, he brushed past Yibo and left the restroom.

“So,” Jackson addressed Yibo as he entered a urinal stall and unzipped his pants, “you guys still remained close after your show ended…that’s rare…and awesome!”

_Why do people keep getting semi naked around me so casually!?_ Yibo groaned inwardly and turned away, pretending to straighten his hair in the mirror.

“Uhh…yeah…Zhan-ge is-”

“Different…he’s very different from all the other celebrities I’ve met,” Jackson spoke with awe in his voice. “Probably because he didn't grow up in the industry.”

A second later, Jackson zipped up again and washed his hands at the sink beside Yibo.

“He’s special,” Jackson spoke, making eye contact with Yibo through the mirror. 

“Yeah, he is,” Yibo replied solemnly, unsure of where Jackson was heading.

“That’s cool, bro!” Jackson slapped Yibo’s shoulder when he was done drying his hands. “I’m so glad you brought him along.”

Yibo’s shoulders relaxed and he smiled and cleared his throat. 

When they rejoined the table, Yibo frowned on seeing the way Yixing’s arm was draped on Xiao Zhan’s chair as he leaned in and spoke to Xiao Zhan. 

_They’re awfully close. I never knew Yixing-ge admired Zhan-ge so much._ Yibo sulked. _But I can’t be jealous. I have no reason to be jealous! After all this is done, that man is coming home with me!_

“More drinks!” Yixing cheered when Jackson and Yibo returned and Yibo noticed the shots that had been ordered.

“Don’t we start shooting tomorrow?” Yibo chuckled and shook his head.

“Ahh, ever the hard worker, Lao Wang!” Xiao Zhan giggled.

“Tomorrow evening, Yibo,” Yixing chuckled as well. “We’ll have plenty of time to sleep in tomorrow morning. Unless you have other commitments, Mr. Popular?” He teased. 

“Never have I ever! Let’s play that game!” Jackson exclaimed. 

“We’re all already half drunk,” Wallace groaned. “I’m too old for this,” he began standing up.

“No, ge! Everyone does this together!” Jackson insisted and Wallace sat down with a long sigh.

“Fine, fine!” Wallace grinned. “Let’s play the game!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more week left to go for school. Thank you for your patience! Wish me luck!


	271. Time to wrap this up

* * *

“Okay, I’ll go first since no one is volunteering!” Jackson cackled after everyone had settled down once more. “Never have I ever bridal carried a man!”

Everyone except Yibo took sips of their drinks. Yibo pursed his lips as all eyes rested on him.

“What?” He spoke defensively. “I’m not strong enough for that I guess,” he rolled his eyes. “But I have done squats with someone piggybacking on me! And I carried Zhan-ge on my back for our drama too!!”

“Fair enough,” Jackson shrugged. “Yixing’s done it as a part of some game during his boy band days I’m assuming…just like me. Right?”

“Yeah, you know how it is in the boy bands…always made to do such silly activities with each other for the sake of skinship!” Yixing snorted and shook his head.

“Same for me,” Xiao Zhan laughed. “With my X-Nine boys.”

“What about you, ge?” Yibo turned to ask Wallace.

“I’ve carried my boyfriend,” Wallace smiled and replied casually.

The entire table went silent before Jackson rushed to save the moment.

“Wow, ge! You can lift a grown ass man, not just a teenage idol!? Lift one of us! The heaviest one!” Jackson exclaimed excitedly.

“I think some other day,” Wallace shook his head. “Not when I’m this drunk, I’ll break my back!”

“Okay, okay, come on Xiao Zhan, you’re next!” Jackson patted Xiao Zhan’s shoulder.

“Okay…umm…never have I ever been carried by a woman!” He grinned cheekily. 

“Oooo…” Yixing exclaimed as both Xiao Zhan and Yibo took sips from their drinks.

“For my movie, Jade Dynasty,” Xiao Zhan scratched the back of his neck and smiled.

“For the legend of fei,” Yibo added.

“Oh! I thought it was by a past girlfriend or something!” Yixing pouted in disappointment. 

“Yeah…no,” Yibo deadpanned.

Xiao Zhan giggled along and turned to Yixing whose turn it was next. 

“Never have I ever crushed on a co-star or colleague before!” Yixing cackled and everyone groaned and took a sip of their drinks.

“Who doesn’t crush on their co-star at some point or the other in this line of work!” Wallace rolled his eyes. “I have one better, never have I ever dated one of my co-stars or colleagues,” he winked.

After a moment’s pause, Jackson, Yibo and Xiao Zhan took a sip of their drinks.

“Woah! Zhan-Zhan!!” Yixing nudged Xiao Zhan. “And Yibo too!?!? Wow, you’re all such hidden characters! And here I thought you two were some of the most professional, goody-two-shoe guys ever!”

“Hey! What does that mean?” Jackson objected. “You’re not surprised about me!?”

“You’re a flirt! I am totally not surprised you dated someone in the industry before!” Yixing reached across Xiao Zhan and smacked Jackson.

“Okay, ge’s turn!” Jackson nursed the spot Yixing smacked and scowled.

“No, no, I need more details!” Wallace looked at the boys in amusement.

“No names, ge! Rules!” Jackson shrugged and smirked. 

“Fine, never have I ever…” Wallace began and then smirked as well, “had a boner while shooting.”

Gasps spread across the table which eventually turned into giggles and laughter as everyone had a sip of their drink, cackling at the smug man. 

When it was Yibo’s turn he stuttered and mumbled excuses.

“I’m really bad at coming up with something!”

But on everyone’s insistence, he thought it over and spoke finally.

“Never have I ever accidentally walked in on others making out,” Yibo grinned sheepishly. 

Everyone except Yibo had a sip of their drink.

“Wow, really…you haven’t?” Xiao Zhan’s eyes widened.

“Guess I was never that lucky…or unlucky,” Yibo chuckled.

“I am pretty sure I almost walked in on two people during Weibo night,” Jackson announced, “when I went to one of the private restrooms! I didn't wait to see them come out but I’m sure two people were going at it inside!” 

Xiao Zhan and Yibo’s eyes widened and they immediately glanced at each other before looking away. 

_Fuck! Was that us?!_ Yibo thought. _That was close!_

From Xiao Zhan’s expressions, he could tell he was thinking the same thing. 

“Okay, we each had a turn,” Wallace chimed in, “how about we call it a night?”

“How about one final one?” Jackson smirked.

“Go ahead,” Wallace grinned back.

Yixing nodded with a grin and spurred him on. The three dance captains looked at each other and then at Xiao Zhan and Yibo before everyone’s gaze rested on Jackson.

“Never have I ever,” Jackson cleared his throat and suppressed a smug grin, “been in a secret relationship with someone at this table!”

Both Yibo and Xiao Zhan froze and looked at him and then at each other. Slowly, their eyes roamed the table and all eyes were unexpectedly on them.

“Not me,” Wallace sat back, “I’m very happy with my boyfriend of nearly a decade!”

“Not me too,” Yixing clucked his tongue and put his drink down. “I’m single and happy.”

“Definitely not me,” Jackson dusted his hands together and sighed. “I am so single but so ready to mingle.”

Then they all placed their elbows on the table and leaned forward, eyeing the two stupefied boys that sat still holding their drinks.

“Your secret is safe with us,” Wallace smiled.

“Now drink,” Jackson instructed.

Yibo looked at Xiao Zhan and raised his eyebrows. Xiao Zhan’s shoulders sagged and he sighed in surrender.

“Fine! You got us,” he took a sip and broke into giggles.

“But how?!” Yibo rolled his eyes.

“Well, for one, all the glares and frowns you were throwing at Yixing everytime he so much as breathed in Xiao Zhan’s direction,” Jackson laughed heartily.

“And then when you both took your little bathroom break…we suspected something,” Wallace added with a wide grin.

“And then when I found you in the bathroom…y’all definitely looked like you had been making out,” Jackson whispered and then burst into laughter again. “Oh! And I thanked you for bringing Xiao Zhan here and you never corrected me which confirmed that he’s in Shanghai for you.”

“Wow…quite the sleuthing,” Xiao Zhan looked around, impressed. 

“Not really, Zhan-Zhan!” Yixing clapped his back. “You two make it fairly obvious.”

“Plus the chemistry between you two…even sitting on opposite ends of the table…it’s real!” Wallace gasped and placed a hand on his chest. “You guys look at each other like you want to jump each other!”

“Liang-ge!!!” Xiao Zhan and Yibo exclaimed in unison. 

“We get it! You guys win!” Yibo sank back in his chair.

“So much for being just friends and seeing which one of us would crack first,” Xiao Zhan chuckled and shook his head.

“Is that what you were going for? If so, Yibo would have cracked first,” Jackson struck the table and stated.

“Wha-why?! I would have won if you all hadn’t guessed!” Yibo objected.

“It’s because it’s written all over your face! Xiao Zhan keeps it together better with his professional face,” Wallace noted.

“That’s not fair!” Yibo pouted.

Xiao Zhan walked over to Yibo’s chair and knelt by his side.

“To be honest,” he spoke softly to Yibo, “I might have cracked first tonight.”

“You’re just saying that…” Yibo sulked but his tone had softened considerably.

“No, I don't think I could have resisted how good you look tonight…and all I wanted to do was hold hands with you and tell everyone here how happy we are,” Xiao Zhan smiled and tipped Yibo’s face in his direction.

“Really?” Yibo relented and let a small smile take over. 

“Really…” Xiao Zhan leaned in and placed a kiss on his shoulder and cheek.

“Good thing we booked a private room,” Jackson quipped.

“You two are so stinking cute,” Wallace exclaimed and sighed.

“Come on now,” Yixing grinned and cleared his throat. “Time to wrap this up, lovebirds.”

Xiao Zhan stood up and took Yibo’s hand in his. 

“Yep, it’s quite late,” he noted. “And you all have a lot of work to do starting tomorrow.”

“Hope we’ll see you around on set! It’ll be a good distraction for one of the top contenders to win this show!” Yixing exclaimed mischievously.

“Oh, please!” Yibo snorted. “If anyone’s a top contender to win, it’s you!”

“Jee, thanks! I feel like I’ve already lost!” Jackson feigned a pout.

Everyone laughed and soon after exchanging some more small talk, the group dispersed. As Xiao Zhan and Yibo made their way back to the hotel, hands clasped together in the car, they stared at each other with smiles on their faces.

“So we both won?” Yibo asked.

“So competitive!” Xiao Zhan laughed softly and kissed the back of his hand. “But if I come on set…will you be able to hold your end?” He winked.

“Open secret, right?” Yibo squeezed his hand in return.

“Open secret.” Xiao Zhan smiled and leaned in sealing their lips together.

When they arrived at the hotel and entered their room, Yibo held Xiao Zhan in place by his hands and stepped closer.

“What?” Xiao Zhan smiled and cupped Yibo’s face.

“I-” Yibo hesitated. 

“What is it, gouzaizai?” Xiao Zhan held him closer by the waist. 

“I want to wear the ring, ge.” Yibo spoke softly. “I want to have it on me for everyone to see.”


	272. If that makes you happy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompts/themes for the zsww/lsfy week are out - [here](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/zsww_lsfy_week_2021/profile) \- don't forget to join the collection if you are interested in participating in the fan week!

* * *

“I want to wear the ring, ge.” Yibo spoke softly. “I want to have it on me for everyone to see.”

“Yibo…” Xiao Zhan sighed. “You know-”

“I know, but I still want to.”

Silence reigned as Xiao Zhan gazed into a pair of adamant eyes. 

“Yibo,” Xiao Zhan spoke finally. “I can’t stop you from doing what you want to do,” he caressed his cheek, “but it’s too risky.”

Yibo smiled sadly and sighed as well.

“I know but…I just wish-”

“Me too, sweetie,” Xiao Zhan pulled him in for a hug, “me too.”

They stayed in the embrace for several minutes before Yibo finally pulled away.

“But I can wear the ox necklace everyone knows you got me…all the fucking time… hell I’ll even kiss it on national television!” Yibo proclaimed before burying his face in Xiao Zhan’s chest again. 

“Alright, my baby lion,” Xiao Zhan laughed. 

“It’s gonna be my lucky charm on this show,” Yibo decided. “And I’ll make sure everyone sees it.”

Xiao Zhan pressed a kiss into Yibo’s temple and held him closer. 

“If that makes you happy.”

* * *

“Yibo!” Xiao Zhan shook him awake the next morning. “I’ve been invited to a variety show!”

“Wha-what?” Yibo replied groggily. 

“It’s a travel variety show for ZheJiang TV!” Xiao Zhan crawled atop Yibo and exclaimed.

“That’s great, ge!” Yibo rubbed his eyes and sat up as Xiao Zhan straddled him, filled with enthusiasm.

“Finally!” Xiao Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo in a tight embrace.

Yibo smiled as Xiao Zhan relaxed into the hug. 

“So when do you leave?”

“I’ll head back to Beijing tonight and then fly to the shoot location tomorrow…it’s all very rushed but it’s a great-” Xiao Zhan hurried to explain.

“It’s a great opportunity and you should take it,” Yibo helped fill in, not needing the explanation.

He understood what this chance meant for Xiao Zhan and his career. A chance to resume normalcy. A chance to finally move on from the hate and do his job. A chance to show everyone that he is back on track and everything is fine. And more importantly, a chance to let it be known that the hate did not win and that he is still a bankable entertainer.

“Are you gonna stop by my set today?” Yibo tucked aside a strand of Xiao Zhan’s hair.

“Maybe some other time…I’ll fly back to Shanghai most likely once I’m done shooting it. Is that okay?”

“How’s your hangover?”

“All better with this news,” Xiao Zhan grinned.

“I’m so happy for you, ge…slowly things are going to become okay…I promise,” Yibo kissed Xiao Zhan and smiled happily.

“Mn,” Xiao Zhan nodded. “It finally feels like it.”

* * *

Several days later, when Xiao Zhan was done shooting his segment in the show, he flew back to Shanghai to surprise Yibo. 

_It’s a good thing our staff knows so I can pull surprises like this off._ Xiao Zhan thought joyfully as he made his way to Yibo’s hotel room. 

Yibo was on set which is where Xiao Zhan would head next after freshening up. Once inside the room, Xiao Zhan let out a long exhale of relief and decided to take a shower. 

_Why am I so nervous of going on his set? It’s not like everyone there has to know we’re together. It could just be a friend visiting a friend. Plus, I have other friends on set too, not just Yibo._

With those thoughts, Xiao Zhan made up his mind and showered and got ready. He put on a casual set of jeans and shirt and called his driver.

On the way to the set, which was close by, Xiao Zhan scrolled through Weibo and rolled his eyes at the hate he was still getting. Someone had leaked shots of him at the shoot of the variety show and now people were ranting on about banning him.

_These people sure are still loud and obnoxious._ Xiao Zhan thought in disgust. _I should speak with my lawyers about this latest issue soon._ He sighed and shook his head. _No point getting my mood upset now over this._

When they reached the shooting venue, Xiao Zhan waited in the car for his bodyguards to okay his exit. After making certain that there were no fans waiting outside the back entrance, they opened the door and Xiao Zhan left the car and with a few, quick steps, he was inside the building. 

As he walked down the narrow corridor, he was met halfway through by one of Yibo’s bodyguard. They nodded and smiled at each other as he led Xiao Zhan the rest of the way. 

Once they were past the contestants and crew, where Xiao Zhan heard Yibo’s name being mentioned more than once followed by words of flattery or excitement, he was led to the room where the captains would return to once they went for a break.

Xiao Zhan couldn't help but smirk when he heard young female contestants and male contestants drool over the captains, especially Yibo.

_If this is their condition during the audition rounds, I wonder how bad they’ll have it when they see Yibo and the captains perform live. They’ll probably all spontaneously combust when Yibo pulls out his moves!_ Xiao Zhan thought in amusement. 

As Xiao Zhan waited, he could see the auditions proceeding on the screens in the room. He scanned them until his eyes landed on Yibo and widened slightly when he saw Yibo in the blue checkered shirt with some highlights in his hair. 

_Oh. Idol Yibo is back._ Xiao Zhan mused as he watched Yibo audition the dancers one by one. 

Just as a female contestant was done performing, he watched as she came close to Yibo to land the finishing the pose and chuckled when he saw Yibo lean away from here to maintain a decent distance. 

“Yibo, ah Yibo!” Xiao Zhan laughed and shook his head. 

His smile widened when he noticed the ox necklace around Yibo’s neck. But he squirmed in his seat when he saw another female contestant try to hit on Yibo. However, he had nothing to worry about and bit his lips to suppress another chuckle when he saw the way she was ignored by Yibo. 

_This boy is either completely clueless or has no sense of self preservation._ Xiao Zhan thought to himself. _He’s always too blunt!_

Just then, Xiao Zhan received a text message from his manager. He opened it and was reading it when the door opened and in came the three dance captains.

“Xiao Zhan!” Yixing exclaimed and rushed forward to embrace him.

Xiao Zhan swallowed his emotions and put his phone aside. 

_No time for this right now._

He plastered a smile on his face and returned Yixing’s greeting. He went on to shake hands and greet Wallace and Jackson who were equally surprised to see him. 

“So glad you could visit the set, bro,” Jackson grinned and bumped shoulders with him.

“Me too,” Xiao Zhan managed to speak.

As he was pulling away from Jackson, Yibo walked in and stopped in his tracks on seeing Xiao Zhan in the room.

“Zhan-ge?!” Yibo exclaimed in disbelief. “You-you’re here?!”

“Hey,” Xiao Zhan smiled and walked towards Yibo.

Before Yibo could say anything more, Xiao Zhan enveloped him in a hug much to everyone’s surprise. Yibo flushed red but after a quick glance at the door and on seeing no cameras around them, wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan for a quick hug as well. 

When Xiao Zhan pulled back, he cleared his throat and tried to keep the smile on.

“I saw some of the auditions so far,” he spoke as calmly as he could, “you have some talented dancers out there…all of you,” he turned to face the other captains.

“Zhan-ge?” Yibo turned him to face him once again by the elbow. “What’s wrong?”

“Huh?” Xiao Zhan feigned confusion. “Nothing’s wrong, Yibo,” he widened his smile. 

“You look upset,” Yibo whispered.

Xiao Zhan glanced at his phone and then at the captains before shaking his head with a sigh.

“Nothing,” he whispered back.

“We can give you some privacy,” Wallace began but Xiao Zhan shook his head.

“Seriously, ge. It’s nothing. It can wait…trust me,” Xiao Zhan cupped Yibo’s cheek and smiled. “Now show me this awesome set of yours and I want to see these amazing dancers!”

“Okay, ge,” Yibo held Xiao Zhan’s hand and squeezed it. “But later, we talk about this, okay?”

“Okay!” Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes. “Now, come on! Let’s go!”

Yibo looked into Xiao Zhan’s eyes with one final, long look before smiling and acquiescing. 

“Okay, ge,” Yibo squeezed Xiao Zhan’s hand once more before nodding and leading the way. “Let’s go.”


	273. I don't know how

* * *

“That Xiao Jie is a really funny guy,” Xiao Zhan chuckled as he entered their hotel room later that evening. “He’s gonna be so much fun to be around and-”

“Alright,” Yibo stopped Xiao Zhan mid-step by the arms once he had locked the door, “now tell me.”

“Bo-di…” Xiao Zhan sighed, “couldn’t even wait a minute after coming back?”

“No…something’s wrong and you promised you would tell me later. Well…” he closed the gap between them and held Xiao Zhan in his arms and softened his voice, “now is later. Tell me, ge.”

Xiao Zhan’s smile faded and he let out a long sigh.

“They cancelled my parts in the variety show I filmed.”

“Wait, what?! Why?” Yibo’s eyebrows shot up and he asked in a shocked tone. 

“It’s not a big deal but they decided to not air it,” Xiao Zhan rushed to placate him. “It’s just a small segment in a variety show.”

Yibo watched Xiao Zhan’s face carefully. His eyes traced the worry lines on his forehead and watched the dullness in his eyes try to spark a smile on his face as he tried to reassure Yibo. He felt a protectiveness surge inside him and he cupped Xiao Zhan’s face and leaned in for a kiss. 

Xiao Zhan relaxed into the kiss and Yibo felt his entire body grow limp and rest against his body.

_I want to protect him from all this but there’s nothing I can do._ Yibo thought as he kissed Xiao Zhan to comfort him. _I wish I could hide him away from all this pain and hate. I wish I could…_

Yibo pulled back, helpless and frustrated. He planted more kisses all over Xiao Zhan’s face and then pulled him into a hug.

“I’m so sorry, ge…and here I was all day showing off my show set and dancers and talking about Being a Hero and-”

“Hey!” Xiao Zhan interrupted him with a stern look. “This is not your fault. And you have nothing to feel guilty about. I am so happy,” his voice cracked with emotion, “that you are doing well in your career...that you are getting all these opportunities...you have earned it. You deserve all this success and more.”

“But-”

“But nothing. My career difficulties have nothing to do with your success and I won’t have you feeling bad about it. I am here to support and celebrate every victory of yours.”

“Why did they cancel it?” Yibo asked.

“I guess they were more affected than I thought by the hate comments they were getting on the leaked stills that let people know I’ll be appearing on their show. The channel didn't want to risk it.”

“Well, they’re stupid and it’s their loss,” Yibo grunted.

Xiao Zhan chuckled and shook his head, ruffling Yibo’s hair in the process.

“Bo-ge,” he whined when Yibo was still sulking. “Don’t be upset, Bo-ge.”

“Stop calling me that…you know how it makes me feel!” Yibo gulped as Xiao Zhan smirked at him.

“How _does_ it make you feel,” Xiao Zhan batted his eyelashes innocently, “Bo-ge?”

Yibo grit his teeth at the teasing as he felt the name go straight to his dick. Xiao Zhan glanced down and looked back at him with renewed interest and amusement.

“You’re just trying to distract me from our conversation,” Yibo replied instead.

“Is it working,” Xiao Zhan whispered as he leaned in and nibbled on Yibo’s ear, “Bo-ge?”

Yibo felt a shiver run down his spine and goosebumps spread down his neck as Xiao Zhan kissed his way down his jawline.

“Zha-Zhan-ge…” Yibo gasped as Xiao Zhan palmed him slowly through his pants.

“Isn’t Bo-ge going to help me distract myself and feel better?” Xiao Zhan whispered against his lips before kissing him again. 

“Mn,” Yibo replied helplessly against the onslaught of Xiao Zhan’s lips and hands working in tandem to slowly unravel his last reserves of defense.

Xiao Zhan walked him backwards towards the bed and lowered them down on it, still working Yibo’s erection over his pants.

“Mmm,” Yibo moaned as he got comfortable on the bed.

Xiao Zhan smiled and crawled on top of Yibo, grinding their erections together as he deepened the kiss. They tangled with each other as the kiss turned hot and heavy and Xiao Zhan keyed Yibo with moans that got more seductive with each passing second.

“Bo-ge,” Xiao Zhan gasped into his mouth when Yibo rolled his hips up against him.

Yibo rolled them over and got on top, eyes dark with hunger.

“Fuck me, Bo-ge,” Xiao Zhan looked at him with lidded eyes and a flushed face as he panted and bit his lower lip.

Yibo didn't need to be told twice. He got off Xiao Zhan for a flash to get the lube. They yanked their clothes off hurriedly before Yibo was stuck to Xiao Zhan like glue once more, bodies naked, breaths heavy. 

Xiao Zhan moaned harder as Yibo’s large fingers found their way inside him, one by one, exploring him, stretching him, caressing him, pleasuring him. He threw his head back as Yibo went deeper and faster when he found his spot and cried out loud as he massaged him there over and over again.

“Bo-ge!” Xiao Zhan moaned, desperate for more. “I’m ready…”

Yibo grabbed Xiao Zhan by the hips and flipped him over with a smirk. Xiao Zhan got on all fours, breathing heavy, body quivering for more. Yibo coated himself with more lube and lined himself up.

“Call me that again…” Yibo rasped as he began entering Xiao Zhan. 

“Bo-ge…” Xiao Zhan shuddered as he felt himself being filled.

“You’re so nice and tight,” he groaned as he slowly bottomed out. 

“Fuck, move…please, Bo-ge…” Xiao Zhan mewled and dropped his head on the bed, arching his back and pushing against Yibo desperately.

Yibo felt himself move before he could even think, spurred on by the moans of _Bo-ge_ and _please_ as Xiao Zhan begged for more. It was like an electric current shot through his body each time Xiao Zhan used that name for him.

With each thrust, the ripples were felt in both their bodies, sweaty, hot, sticky. As Xiao Zhan moved with him in the perfect rhythm, his ass slapped against Yibo making the most lewd and delicious sounds Yibo had ever heard. 

“Fuck…” Xiao Zhan groaned when Yibo smacked his ass, “Harder, Bo-ge…”

Yibo growled and smacked his other cheek harder, grabbing it, massaging it. He leaned forward and sank his teeth into Xiao Zhan’s back as he thrust in deeper each time. Xiao Zhan’s cries grew with each thrust and he arched his hips higher, eager for more. 

“Bo-ge!” Xiao Zhan fell forward when one particularly well timed thrust sent him over the edge. 

With another growl, Yibo fucked him through his orgasm and chased his own pleasure. He fucked into Xiao Zhan’s ass furiously and came ripping into him several seconds later. With a loud grunt, he fell limp on top of Xiao Zhan as well.

“Fuck…” Yibo groaned when he finally came to.

“You’re getting heavy, get off me, Bo-ge!” Xiao Zhan flinched under him.

With a sigh, Yibo slid off to one side and pulled out of Xiao Zhan.

“Don’t call me, Bo-ge unless you wanna go for round two again, Zhan-ge!” He managed to mutter as he lay back, spent. 

“Duly noted,” Xiao Zhan giggled and turned around to lay on his back. “Come here.”

Yibo snuggled up to him and rested in his arms. They cuddled under the blanket and Xiao Zhan gazed at the ceiling as Yibo buried himself in his side. 

“We need to clean up,” Xiao Zhan reminded him.

“Mmm,” Yibo nodded but only snuggled closer.

“Come on, gouzaizai…let me take care of you,” Xiao Zhan chuckled and kissed his forehead.

“I should be taking care of you,” Yibo murmured half asleep.

“Why do you say that?” Xiao Zhan asked.

“Because of everything that’s happening…I should be the one taking care of you…but I don't know how,” Yibo whispered, hugging Xiao Zhan harder.

“Just be with me through all this,” Xiao Zhan whispered in reply. “Just be by my side and I can handle the rest.”

“Okay,” Yibo hummed against Xiao Zhan’s chest. “I’m always here, ge. Always right by your side.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wrote a short halloween themed yizhan fic - [hocus-pocus!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27285283) \- if anyone is interested!


	274. It's done

* * *

And so June went by with Xiao Zhan by his side as much as his schedule allowed it. One of Yibo’s brand sponsors provided him with a private jet for the duration of his shoot for Being a Hero. This made the flying between the sets for SDOC and BAH a little easier and by avoiding the crazy sasaeng fans and airport paparazzi, Xiao Zhan could come with him whenever he pleased.

To Yibo, it was the perfect setup. But he could see the faded looks every now and then in Xiao Zhan’s eyes no matter how much he tried to hide them or how much Yibo tried to distract him. In one such attempt to distract him, Yibo brought up all the doodling Xiao Zhan had been doing during quarantine.

“Ge, you should start drawing again and maybe even post them online…”

“What’s the point?” Xiao Zhan shrugged at the suggestion.

“Does there have to be a point?” Yibo wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan and pulled him back against his chest as they sat on the hotel bed at his BAH location.

Xiao Zhan sighed and rested against Yibo.

“You’re right…I should do things I enjoy doing while I have the time instead of worrying about what may or may not happen later.”

And so Xiao Zhan resumed his artistic endeavours and slowly but surely it helped him find joy in his surroundings again. And Yibo did what he did best - showing his love and support for Xiao Zhan through his actions. Whether it was by being by his side when they were together or by encoding his love for the world to see on Weibo.

“You should think of starting your own studio too,” Xiao Zhan said one day when Yibo was frustrated with his management.

“You’re right,” Yibo replied, suddenly taken by the idea in the heat of the moment. “That’s what I need! And I’ll launch it on my birthday!”

“I could design the logo for you!” Xiao Zhan beamed happily and Yibo nodded frantically. 

“Yes!”

Weeks later, when the logo was ready, Yibo got so excited that he decided he would use it at the first opportunity.

“This is perfect, ge!” Yibo jumped into Xiao Zhan’s lap on seeing the design. “This black panther is so cool!”

“You really think so?” Xiao Zhan scratched the back of his neck. “You wanna use it for your studio?”

“For my studio?! I’m gonna use it everywhere I can! I’ll make my SDOC mascot this panther too! It’s so freaking cool!” Yibo exclaimed and then proceeded to kiss Xiao Zhan senseless to show his appreciation.

* * *

Towards the end of June, Xiao Zhan’s case against the antis was going strong and they had gathered enough evidence for targeted harassment. 

“Do you really have to be so nice, ge?” Yibo asked him as they video chatted one night. “That account that your fans are attacking is an anti account, they deserve the hate they’re getting. And you still want to help them?”

“That’s not the point, Yibo!” Xiao Zhan sighed and shook his head. “The point is that harassment and bullying should not be allowed on online platforms so easily. This needs to stop no matter who is at the receiving end. Cyberbullying needs to end.”

“You’re too good for this world, Zhan-ge,” Yibo relented finally. “I would’ve just ignored them. You’re just like Wei Wuxian.”

Xiao Zhan chuckled and the conversation went on as it always did. When the call ended, Xiao Zhan texted his manager one final time, giving her the green light to finally take the case to court so they could begin putting an end to all the hate once and for all.

* * *

“It’s done,” was the first thing Xiao Zhan said when Yibo answered the video call. 

“What’s done?” Yibo yawned and stretched as he settled into his hotel bed. 

“After more than four months of this hate and harassment,” Xiao Zhan’s voice trembled, “they’re finally taking action and shutting down the 227 supertopic and suspending many of the anti accounts.”

Yibo sat up like an arrow and gazed at Xiao Zhan’s resolute but emotional face. 

“Are you serious? They’re finally doing something about it?”

Xiao Zhan nodded and Yibo could see the shine in his eyes. 

“Are you okay?” Yibo asked softly.

“I’m so fucking happy and relieved,” Xiao Zhan breathed out a laugh. “This means the platform will become a little safer and cleaner and more positive now on.”

“And it also means you will receive less backlash on every move you make,” Yibo reminded him.

“That’s going to be a slow process to begin my recovery,” Xiao Zhan sighed. “But one step at a time.”

“One step at a time,” Yibo smiled and blew him a flying kiss. “I love you, baobao.”

“Love you too, gouzaizai.”

When Xiao Zhan ended the call, he let out a long sigh and sat in their porch swing at home. His heart ached for Yibo who was hundreds of kilometers away. But his heart ached for another reason too. An ache that was not going away because of the relief. An ache that was lodged deep inside him and refused to budge even now when things seemed to be finally looking up. 

An ache that stuck with him even when he painted and drew, sang and wrote, cooked and read. An ache that had found him some months ago and decided to stay. An ache he had kept hidden and an ache that had still found no cure. 

Just then, his thoughts were interrupted by a call.

“Wei,” he answered his manager’s call.

“Hello, Laoban. Congratulations on the good news!” The woman on the other end of the line exclaimed.

“Mn. Thanks,” Xiao Zhan replied, staring at the setting sun. “Is that what you wanted to talk to me about?”

“No, I have more good news!” Her voice grew excited and eager.

“What is it?”

“There’s an acting offer…two in fact!”

“What?” Xiao Zhan sat up straight. 

“A short role in a covid related drama for CCTV and a military drama series. Both are government backed projects. The antis won’t be able to come after you for either of them! They are _very_ safe bets for your comeback so to speak.”

“That’s great! If the team thinks it’s a good move, then I am all in for it. Send me the scripts and details,” Xiao Zhan sank back into the swing. “I have another…call now…”

“Oh, alright! I just wanted to give you the good news myself!”

“Thanks, jie,” Xiao Zhan let out a small smile. “Bye.”

Xiao Zhan checked the time and swallowed and wiped the corner of his eyes. Then, with one long, cleansing breath, dialled the number. 

“Hello, Zhan-Zhan,” a familiar male voice answered the call.

Xiao Zhan shut his eyes and the tears slid out just as they did each time he had spoken to the person in the last few months.

“Do you still feel guilty?” The man asked in a soft, warm tone.

“Shouldn’t I?” Xiao Zhan let out a bitter laugh. “This has been going on for months and he has no idea.”

“Then tell him,” the man said gently, almost with hope.

Xiao Zhan watched the sun finally disappear below the horizon and let out a soft sigh as darkness enveloped him.

“Yes, I think it’s time I tell him.”


	275. What is going on?

* * *

Yibo woke up excited. It was the day Xiao Zhan would fly to be with him as he continued the shooting for BAH. It was also probably going to be the last time Xiao Zhan was able to visit him on set and spend time with him like this because starting the week after, he would begin shooting his new covid drama and then head to the set for the new military drama series. He got out of bed as soon as the alarm rang and rushed to the shower to get ready. 

_In the interest of saving time._ Yibo thought as he showered and fingered himself open with an excited smirk. _I’ll just prep myself._

Twenty minutes later, when there was a soft knock on the door, Yibo rushed out and opened it.

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo welcomed Xiao Zhan and embraced him enthusiastically. 

“Hey,” Xiao Zhan beamed on seeing Yibo.

When Yibo pulled back, the light in Xiao Zhan’s eyes dimmed. He was about to say something when a set of lips plastered themselves against his. Xiao Zhan melted into the kiss even as his mind told him to stop. His body followed Yibo further into the room.

The kiss deepened as Yibo pulled Xiao Zhan in by the collar. They devoured each other against the walls and furniture, dropping Xiao Zhan’s bags and jacket along the way. Xiao Zhan couldn't resist it when Yibo took his hands and slid it down his pants. 

He slammed Yibo against the wall and grinded against him.

“I prepped myself for you, ge,” Yibo leaned back against the surface and grinned as Xiao Zhan eyed him hungrily.

“Fuck,” Xiao Zhan hissed and shut his eyes, trying to regain some sense of control over his body.

“Yes, exactly,” Yibo giggled and pulled Xiao Zhan towards him by the shirt until their lips were mere inches apart.

 _Why are you so perfect?_ Xiao Zhan gazed into Yibo’s eyes and thought with a pang to his heart. 

Something came over him and he surged forward and took Yibo’s lips with renewed enthusiasm. Yibo let out a gasp as Xiao Zhan kissed his way down his face, his neck, his shoulders, sinking his teeth into the pale skin. Yibo dragged him to the bed.

“Wait, wait,” Xiao Zhan began when Yibo pushed him down on the bed.

“What?” Yibo sat on top of Xiao Zhan, and tilted his head to one side. 

Xiao Zhan’s heart melted at the innocent look on Yibo’s face and suddenly it felt twice as heavy. 

“Yibo…” Xiao Zhan sat up so that Yibo was now straddling him and they were face to face, “I…we…uhh…”

“What happened, Zhan-ge? Are you okay? Are you tired?”

“Yeah!” Xiao Zhan blurted. “I’m tired…and need a shower,” he mumbled hurriedly. 

“Okay,” Yibo feigned a pout then smiled and quickly kissed Xiao Zhan on the nose. “Go freshen up.”

Xiao Zhan stood up once Yibo had crawled off him. With a heavy heart, he made his way to the shower and freshened up.

 _Come on, Xiao Zhan._ He thought as the hot water hit him. _This has gone on long enough. You have to tell him. You can't hide such a thing any more. It’s bad enough that you’ve kept it from him for this long._

“But what if he hates me for lying…” Xiao Zhan whispered into the pouring water. “What if he says he can never trust me again.”

* * *

Yibo lounged on the bed, scrolling through his phone.

 _Something seemed off with Zhan-ge._ He thought to himself with a frown. _Let me check Weibo to see if there’s some new set of crap to the scandal. Everything is calming down now but he still seemed…off. And I always feel like I have to pry him open when it comes to the work issues he’s facing._

Even after several minutes, when he couldn't find anything new that could have upset Xiao Zhan, Yibo gave up with a grunt and tossed his phone aside. 

_If there was something, Zhan-ge would tell me._ Yibo decided. 

Just then, Xiao Zhan’s phone began ringing. Yibo glanced at it and noticed the name ‘Zhang Wei’ on the screen. The name rang no bells and Yibo resumed playing a game on his phone. A few minutes later, there was a ping and a notification lit the screen up once more. It was a text from Zhang Wei on Xiao Zhan’s phone.

> _Zhang Wei: Hope you had a good flight  
>    
>  Zhang Wei: You left your diary at my place  
>    
>  Zhang Wei: I’ll keep it safe till I see you again next time  
>    
>  Zhang Wei: Take care, Zhan-Zhan _

_Who is this guy?_ Yibo’s interest was now piqued. _When did he meet ge? I don’t recognize him. And diary? Ge has a diary? What’s going on?_ Yibo sat up and stared at the screen until the notification dimmed and eventually the screen turned off. 

Tempted and curious, Yibo reached for the phone and bit his lips. 

_I shouldn't be checking his phone behind his back._ Yibo debated with himself. _But I won’t hide it from him. I can just tell him I got curious. Surely, ge won’t mind._

Yibo began unlocking the phone when another thought struck him.

_What if…what if he’s hiding something?_

“No! Don’t be an idiot,” Yibo shook his head and chuckled. “I don't need to check his phone. I can just ask him when he’s out of the shower.”

Yibo set the phone aside but his mind didn't leave him alone.

_But he called him Zhan-Zhan? Is he a close friend? Why have I never heard of him before then? And why wouldn't I know if ge had a diary or is meeting someone. We tell each other everything._

Swallowing his fears, Yibo unlocked Xiao Zhan’s phone and opened his call log. Sure enough, there were calls to and from Zhang Wei. Several calls in fact that lasted for long durations. Calls going back several weeks and months. 

Confused and now slightly distraught, Yibo put caution aside and opened the unread text message. He scrolled up to see the last message Xiao Zhan had sent to Zhang Wei.

> _Xiao Zhan: I was just thinking about what you said  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: And you’re right, it’s time I tell him _

Yibo’s heart caught in his throat and he scrolled up but the other messages were just short exchanges to decide the times of their calls and apparent meet-ups.

 _What is going on?_ Yibo felt his heart stop and his stomach drop. _Is Zhan-ge…_

Just then the bathroom door opened and Xiao Zhan walked out with just a towel wrapped around his waist. He smiled at Yibo as he dried his hair with another towel but the smile faded a little when he saw his phone in Yibo’s hand.

“What happened, gouzaizai? You look like you’ve seen a ghost?” Xiao Zhan walked towards Yibo who was sitting at the edge of the bed.

“No-nothing, ge…I was just…”

“Just what? Were you playing on my phone again?” Xiao Zhan smiled and ruffled Yibo’s hair. 

“Ye-yeah,” Yibo began but then his curiosity got the better of him. “No, I…you received a call and some messages and I-”

“Oh, who from?” Xiao Zhan walked to his bag to retrieve a new set of clothes to change into.

“Zhang Wei,” Yibo blurted and Xiao Zhan’s movements paused.

Noticing the reaction, Yibo felt something in his stomach drop further. 

“Who is he, ge? Who is Zhang Wei?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im trying my hand at my first omegaverse story! go give it a read if you haven't already - [chap 1 is out](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27500152)!


	276. Try and understand

* * *

“Who is he, ge? Who is Zhang Wei?”

“Yibo…” Xiao Zhan whispered and slowly dropped his head low. 

“Ge…” Yibo stood up and watched uneasily as Xiao Zhan remained silent and still.

Something in Yibo’s chest turned cold and heavy. He wanted to ask again but this time he was afraid of the answer. Xiao Zhan, still in his towel, remaining standing with his back to Yibo, unmoving and quiet. 

“Is he…are you…” Yibo choked on his words and felt his voice grow meeker with each passing second. 

The silence stretched between them like a never-ending wall and Yibo suddenly felt very alone on one side of it, unable to close the gap to meet Xiao Zhan on the other side. A few more moments passed and as the thoughts in his mind whirled like a tornado, anger started growing inside Yibo.

“Tell me. Answer me!” Yibo spat out angrily. “Are you cheating on me!?”

“What?!” Xiao Zhan spun around abruptly, visibly startled and stunned. 

“Who is-is he?” Yibo’s trembling lips stuttered over his words. “Are you che-cheating on me wi-with him?” 

Tears flooded Yibo’s face as the words hurled out of his mouth. As their meaning crashed down on him, Yibo felt his heart break just by asking them. Suddenly, his knees gave way, and he slumped down onto the edge of the bed shakily, gripping the edges tightly. His vision grew blurry with the rapid onslaught of tears and he felt his breath catching in his throat and a pain forming in his chest. He bent over, quivering, and gasped for breath. 

“Yibo?! Are you okay?” Xiao Zhan noticed his laboured breaths and rushed to his side.

Xiao Zhan knelt on the ground in front of Yibo and squeezed his knees.

“Yibo? Can you hear me? Sweetie?” Xiao Zhan repeated, trying to get through to the dazed boy that sat on the bed, still breathing hard and crying. “Breathe, sweetie. You’re panicking. Remember what you told me when I got like this? Just breathe…slowly…with me,” he cupped Yibo’s face and tilted it to look at him. “Breathe with me, gouzaizai.”

Yibo shook his head violently, freeing it from Xiao Zhan’s grasp and clutched at his shirt instead. 

“Tell me. Now.” Yibo managed to utter between breaths.

“No! No! Of course not!” Xiao Zhan looked at him worriedly, placing a hand on his, rubbing his arm with his other hand. “Never. I am not cheating on you with anyone!”

Yibo let out a long, deep breath and shut his eyes. He began taking in slow, deep breaths and leaned into Xiao Zhan’s touch.

After a few more moments, he managed to get his breathing under control and finally spoke once he had caught his breath.

“Then who is he? Why don’t I know who he is? And that you visited and called him a lot over the last few months and that you have a diary that you left at his place?”

Xiao Zhan’s hands stilled on Yibo’s arm and he looked at him with an expression that was a mix of pain, fear, guilt, and something else. Something Yibo couldn't decipher.

“He’s my…therapist,” Xiao Zhan spoke in a resigned tone as he sat down on his knees and looked away. “Zhang Wei is my therapist.” He repeated as if speaking to himself.

Yibo was stunned into silence.

“I began seeing him a few months back after my grandfather passed away and I couldn't go to the funeral because of…” Xiao Zhan’s words trailed away and his voice reduced to a mere whisper.

When Yibo still didn't say anything, he went on with a soft sigh.

“I couldn’t cope with the hate and everything while I was alone for that month.” Xiao Zhan muttered almost inaudibly, “So I asked an old friend for his cousin’s contact because I knew he’s a therapist in Beijing. And I…began seeing him.” 

Yibo remained silent. 

“I…I’ve been feeling depressed and anxious,” Xiao Zhan finally broke the silence again and then he waited. 

_What is Yibo going to say?_ Xiao Zhan thought sadly. _What is he thinking? Maybe he needs more time to process this. I don't blame him. But I shouldn't feel guilty about keeping this from him. I did what was right for me and my mental health at the time._

Xiao Zhan sighed and got up. He went to his bag and quickly put on a shirt and shorts while Yibo remained silent on the bed. 

“This has been going on for nearly four months and you didn’t tell me!?” Yibo suddenly stood up angrily.

Xiao Zhan turned around, a disappointed and resigned look on his face.

“Yibo, try and understand-”

“Why, ge? Why couldn't you tell me?”

“Because I wasn’t ready!!” Xiao Zhan snapped finally. “I wasn’t ready to tell anyone that I’m in therapy and that I take medications for my depression and anxiety. I wasn't ready. My mental health-”

“Not even me?!” Yibo interrupted with a pained look on his face.

“This isn’t about you! Can’t you see. This is about me. This is just something I had to do. I needed time! Can you try and understand that?!” Xiao Zhan felt the back of his eyes burn. 

They stared at each other, both pained and both hurt by the other’s actions and words. 

“Yibo,” Xiao Zhan took in a deep breath and a step towards the boy, “I needed time. Every time I spoke to you about this stuff you would feel so guilty about your career and so bad about it that in the end…in the end I had to be the one to comfort you sometimes. And I just couldn't cope with this any more. It was all too much.”

“Are you saying I wasn't helpful,” Yibo looked at him with watery eyes.

“Yibo,” Xiao Zhan grew irritated and tired, “I was sick. And I turned to a doctor for help.”

“And you didn't tell your fiance,” Yibo whispered.

“I won't feel bad about that because that is what I needed at the time and I was hoping you’d understand…” Xiao Zhan turned away, frustrated. “But clearly you don't. All you can see is your side of this.”

“What if this was the other way around. How would you feel!?” Yibo exclaimed.

“I would feel bad too, Yibo. But I would understand that sometimes…loving someone unconditionally means waiting for them to be ready to share things with you.”

When Yibo didn't respond, Xiao Zhan went on. 

“Do you think I wanted this? That I wanted to keep it from you? Can you imagine how hard it must have been for me? How low I must have been if I had to keep it from you too? I’m sorry, Yibo. But I couldn't get myself to tell anyone. But when I finally started making progress in therapy, the first person I wanted to tell was you, my best friend. And I know you might not believe me now, but I was actually going to tell you today.”

Xiao Zhan let out a long sigh and closed his bag with a zip. He turned around and crossed his arms across his chest. Yibo was sitting on the bed again, looking away from him.

“Be honest and tell me, Yibo.” Xiao Zhan finally asked him. “Do you want me to leave?” 

“I-I don't know,” Yibo whispered.

“Do you need time? Space?” Xiao Zhan tried again. 

“Yes,” Yibo replied after a long pause. 

With a pained look on his face, Xiao Zhan grabbed his bag and jacket and turned towards the door.

“I’m sorry, Yibo.” He managed to speak before choking on his own tears.

With a few long strides, Xiao Zhan stepped outside the room and closed the door behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't responded to comments on the last chapter! I was travelling over the last 3 days! But damn some of you guessed it :(
> 
> Chap 2 of my omegaverse story - [Scent](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27500152/chapters/67372411) \- is out as well.


	277. What just happened

* * *

Yibo sat at the edge of the bed, clutching the mattress. His eyes were trained on the floor and his vision was blurry as the door closed behind Xiao Zhan. 

_What...just...happened._

Yibo’s mind was filled with chaos and a heavy silence simultaneously. It was as if his thoughts were weighed down by something even as they whirled around like a storm inside him. 

_I can’t believe Zhan-ge hid something as big as this from me for four months._

Yibo’s tears began flowing again.

_I didn't think he would be capable of keeping secrets from me._

Yibo trembled as his mind jumped to worse thoughts that dragged him further down.

_Why does this feel like a betrayal? Why do I feel like my trust was broken? What else has he been hiding? How could he do this to me?_

Suddenly Xiao Zhan’s words echoed in his mind.

_“All you can see is your side of this.”_

_“I would feel bad too, Yibo. But I would understand that sometimes…loving someone unconditionally means waiting for them to be ready to share things with you.”_

Yibo sank to the floor.

_Am I really being selfish?_

And then it struck him.

 _Wait._ Yibo finally looked up in shock. _Zhan-ge has anxiety and depression. And he’s been fighting with it alone all this time. And he was finally about to tell someone apart from his therapist...he was finally about to tell me about it for the first time._

* * *

Xiao Zhan stood outside the door, mask on his face, bag in his hand, head hanging heavy. 

_This did not go as I expected. But then again, what was I expecting? A hug of understanding? Maybe that was too much to ask for. Maybe he needs time to…_

His tears halted his own train of thought and flowed freely as Xiao Zhan sank to the ground. 

_I thought he would be able to prioritize my mental health instead of focussing on the other stuff first..._

He covered his face with his hands and wept silently into them, willing himself to shake off the emotions and keep it together.

_I wanted him to be able to put everything else aside for now so that we could talk about how I’ve been feeling. Was I selfish? Was I wrong?_

Xiao Zhan sat in silence, shoulders shaking, and wept.

Just then, he felt a pair of arms encircle him and a warm weight press against his back.

“Come inside, ge. Please.”

Xiao Zhan felt the arms help him back to his feet and bring him inside once again.

Xiao Zhan fell into the arms once the door closed behind him and Yibo hugged him tightly. Xiao Zhan felt the knot in his chest ease and his sobs reduced to sniffles. When he pulled back, he saw Yibo’s face was tear stained as well.

“I’m sorry, ge…I should have-” Yibo began.

“I’m sorry, didi…I shouldn't have-” Xiao Zhan began simultaneously.

“Don't apologize for how you felt,” Yibo placed a hand on Xiao Zhan’s mouth and continued. “You were going through a lot and I couldn't be there by your side to help you through it. I am glad you were able to get the help you needed.”

“So,” Xiao Zhan sniffled, “you’re not mad at me?”

“I’m sorry I got mad, ge…” Yibo shook his head. “It was childish of me. But I’m not mad now. I don't need time and space…I’ll understand this slowly with you by my side. I’ll get there, I promise. I won't be selfish.”

Xiao Zhan felt a surge of emotions that he couldn't rein in as he leapt forward and sealed his lips on Yibo’s. Yibo wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan and returned the kiss urgently. They remained wrapped in each other for several seconds as they clung to each other desperately.

When Xiao Zhan finally pulled back for a breath of air, he rested his forehead against Yibo. 

“Are you okay?” Yibo asked and wiped Xiao Zhan’s tears. 

“Are _you_ okay?” Xiao Zhan asked in reply and wiped Yibo’s cheeks. 

“I will be…I promise,” Yibo responded with a small smile.

“Okay,” Xiao Zhan sniffled and nodded. “Ask me whatever you want…”

“I want you to tell me whatever you’re comfortable with sharing for now,” Yibo cupped Xiao Zhan’s face and replied. “If you’re not there yet, I can wait…”

“I’m there…” Xiao Zhan tilted his face and kissed the palm of Yibo’s hand. “And I want to tell you everything.”

* * *

“I’m sorry,” Yibo muttered as they lay in bed together, Xiao Zhan in his arms. 

“Stop apologizing,” Xiao Zhan turned to face him and kissed his nose. “Everything’s in the open now. And that’s all that matters.”

“Mn,” Yibo nodded and wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan protectively.

“So when was the last time you had a panic attack?”

“It’s been a few weeks. My anxiety has gotten better. Wei-ge taught me some tricks and techniques that have helped.”

“What does it feel like?” Yibo continued. “When you’re having an attack.”

“Like I’m going to die,” Xiao Zhan replied quietly. “It could be different for someone else. But for me, it feels like the end.”

Yibo’s arms tightened around Xiao Zhan, making him smile and shake his head.

“But now I know it will pass,” Xiao Zhan sighed. “It will always pass. Sometimes in a few minutes, sometimes longer. But it will always pass.”

“I’m glad you were brave enough to get the help you needed, ge,” Yibo spoke after a long spell of silence. “And I’m glad the medicines are helping too.”

“Thank you,” Xiao Zhan turned around in Yibo’s arms and buried his face in his neck. “Thank you for saying that.”

Yibo kissed the top of his head and let out a long exhale. 

“Now, your turn,” Xiao Zhan spoke again.

“My turn?”

“Is there something you want to tell me?”

“Umm…no…”

“Okay…just checking…” Xiao Zhan smiled and kissed Yibo lightly.

Yibo followed Xiao Zhan as he retreated and took his lips in his once more. They deepened the kiss and lost themselves in each other as their limbs tangled. Xiao Zhan got on top of Yibo and began grinding against him, rubbing their erections together.

“Ge…” Yibo moaned as Xiao Zhan made his way down his neck.

“I love you, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan whispered back. “I love you so much.” 

“Actually, there is something…” Yibo managed to say as Xiao Zhan began removing their clothes.

“Hmm?” 

“You start shooting again for the covid drama soon?”

“Yeah, next week,” Xiao Zhan replied.

“And then the military drama?”

“That’s in August…why?

“Will you be done by October?”

“No, the schedule will go on till the end of the year.”

“So you’ll have to tell them you need time off in October,” Yibo sat up with Xiao Zhan still in his lap.

“Why?” Xiao Zhan tilted his head to one side, confused.

“Because we’ll be getting married in Taiwan in October, remember?” Yibo whispered and kissed Xiao Zhan’s chin. 

A small smile spread across Xiao Zhan’s face as realization dawned on him. 

“Yeah?” Xiao Zhan asked, his eyes turning watery. 

“Yeah,” Yibo replied and wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan in a tight embrace. “Nothing’s changed, ge. I still want to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you.”

“Nothing’s changed for me too, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan whispered as he hugged him back. “You’re still the one for me too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're at the end of June 2020 in the story now.
> 
> Also, [chap 3 of Scent ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27500152/chapters/67771895)is now out!


	278. Everything is looking up again slowly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello readers! Sorry for the long gap. My mental health needed my attention and life sort of got in the way. Thank you for your patience and constant support!!! Even though I haven't been able to reply to every comment lately, I DO READ THEM ALL and they make my day, so please keep them coming!

* * *

Xiao Zhan lay in bed and ran his hands down the naked back of a sleeping Yibo the next morning. It was his last day on location with Yibo before he left for his own shoot for the covid drama. 

“Mmm,” Yibo hummed as Xiao Zhan caressed his bare skin.

“You’re up?” Xiao Zhan snuggled closer and kissed Yibo’s mole on the back of his neck. 

“Mn,” Yibo turned around and cuddled into Xiao Zhan’s arms. “When do you have to leave?” He asked in a sleep-heavy voice.

“In a few hours,” Xiao Zhan sighed and kissed Yibo’s cheek.

“I’ll miss you,” Yibo pouted and kissed Xiao Zhan’s bare chest. 

“I’ll miss you too,” Xiao Zhan smiled and hugged Yibo tighter.

“So…no more secrets?” Yibo raised himself on his elbows and faced Xiao Zhan.

Xiao Zhan gazed into Yibo’s sincere eyes and brushed aside a strand of stray hair.

“No more secrets,” he whispered and cupped the back of Yibo’s neck and pulled him closer for a kiss. 

Yibo crawled on top of Xiao Zhan as the kiss deepened. They sighed into it as their naked bodies rubbed against each other, losing themselves in the sensations. As their lips moved together, Yibo’s hand reached for the lube and he sat up once he managed to find it.

“I’m still loose from last night,” he smirked and raised his eyebrows at Xiao Zhan.

Xiao Zhan glanced at his growing erection and smirked back with a nod. He massaged himself with his hand, as he watched Yibo stretch himself more in preparation. His lips parted in lust and he stared at Yibo with heavy lidded eyes as Yibo fingered himself open and his hand worked his now fully erect dick in anticipation.

“I wanna ride you,” Yibo murmured as he began lining himself with Xiao Zhan.

“Fuck yes,” Xiao Zhan whispered as Yibo began lowering himself on him. 

They groaned in pleasure and Xiao Zhan hissed at the tight warmth that surrounded him. Yibo threw his head back, baring his entire throat and chest for Xiao Zhan to admire. Before he knew what he was doing, Xiao Zhan had one hand wrapped around Yibo’s sultry neck. 

Yibo gasped in surprise and Xiao Zhan tightened his hand around his neck just the slightest bit. 

“Move faster,” Xiao Zhan instructed.

Yibo felt a rush of electricity shoot down his spine and he picked up speed as Xiao Zhan thrust upwards to meet him each time.

As they moved together, growing sweatier and stickier, Xiao Zhan grabbed hold of Yibo’s waist and flipped them over. He threw Yibo’s legs over his shoulders and nearly folded him in half as he began thrusting into him harder. 

“Neck, ge,” Yibo whined.

Xiao Zhan’s eyes darkened and he clamped down on Yibo’s neck once more. 

“This feel good?” He grunted as he rammed into Yibo.

“Mmm-aaah-yeah,” Yibo moaned helplessly as Xiao Zhan thrust into him mercilessly. 

Their bodies tangled together as they chased their orgasms. They lost themselves in each other and Xiao Zhan growled as he rammed in a few more times. 

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo came untouched all of a sudden.

Xiao Zhan fucked him through his high, determined to prolong it as much as he could. He knead into him deeper, harder, and faster each time, chasing the moans that escaped Yibo’s mouth. Finally, when he came in a frenzied rush as well, he fell forward and sealed his lips on Yibo’s in an attempt to silence his sounds.

Yibo kissed him senseless, absorbing every groan, and they stuck to each other in a messy pile after. 

“I love you,” Xiao Zhan breathed soundlessly when he finally came to. “I love you so fucking much.”

* * *

Xiao Zhan shut the bag and zipped it all the way around. 

“Done packing,” he announced as Yibo played a game on his phone. 

“Mn,” Yibo nodded without looking up.

Xiao Zhan smiled and shook his head. He picked the bag and placed it at the door, where he began wearing his shoes.

“Wait, is it time to leave already?!” Yibo jumped out of bed and followed him to the door. 

“Yes, sweetie,” Xiao Zhan chuckled. “My car is waiting downstairs.”

“Oh, okay,” Yibo leaned against the hallway and sighed.

After wearing his shoes, Xiao Zhan walked up to a visibly sulking Yibo and cupped his face.

“Take care of yourself, okay...don’t overdo the appetizer suppressants and diet pills. And eat properly.”

“I don't overdo-”

“Just be careful,” Xiao Zhan repeated and kissed both his cheeks.

“I will,” Yibo sighed and embraced Xiao Zhan. 

They stayed in each other’s arms for several seconds, taking in each other’s warmth as they swayed together. 

“Okay, now I really should go,” Xiao Zhan whispered.

“Good luck with the show,” Yibo pulled back slowly and managed a small smile. 

“I’ve been lucky they’ve managed to keep my involvement in the show under wraps till now. I can’t wait to get back in front of the camera and act!” Xiao Zhan smiled brightly. 

“Everything will work out,” Yibo assured him, “and things will go smoothly now on. I promise. Things are looking up now.”

“Mn,” Xiao Zhan nodded and then proceeded to check his belongings one more time to make sure he packed everything.

“Did you pack your medicines?” Yibo asked.

“Yes,” Xiao Zhan smiled and checked his bag. “Now if only I could pack you along with me as well,” he chuckled and leaned in for one final kiss. 

* * *

Sure enough, returning to the set came to him like riding a cycle. Over the course of July, Xiao Zhan shot for his new role of Cai Ding and everything was done by the production to keep his involvement under wraps. 

Once he was back home in Beijing at the end of July, he continued preparing and working out for his role in the military drama. One evening, he got an unexpected call from his manager.

“Wei,” Xiao Zhan answered the call. 

“Remember the questions you had sent to the theater artist?”

“About the book I was reading? Yes. Why?”

“Well, they liked your questions so much that they want you to interview them at the event celebrating the writer!”

“Wha-what!?” Xiao Zhan sat up abruptly in his seat. “With Wan Fang!?”

“Yes! The event is on July 31st and you will be up on stage between theater acts to interview her. She has also invited you for a post event dinner!”

“Oh my god! That is amazing!” Xiao Zhan jumped up and down in his living room. “This is such short notice but amazing nonetheless!!”

“So should I tell them yes?”

“Yes! Yes!” Xiao Zhan laughed and accepted the offer. 

When he ended the call, his first thought was to dial Yibo and share the news with him. Xiao Zhan sighed as he texted Yibo instead, remembering that he must be in a shoot for BAH at the time. 

“Everything _is_ looking up again slowly,” he smiled to himself happily. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to make up for the long gap and short chapter, here are some old yizhan moments -
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PCg8ZhG6Mv0  
> https://youtu.be/PCg8ZhG6Mv0?t=905  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkdXCch_JDQ&t=1s  
> https://twitter.com/ohsonsaeng/status/1169251541556977664  
> https://twitter.com/dormntchrysalis/status/1293983570772611074?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/GusuLan8125/status/1296500944688078848?s=20 
> 
> and here is the interview xz did with the theater artists - 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHQkwlRJdWo&ab_channel=FefeH
> 
> we are now at the end of july 2020.


	279. Can you leave?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO HERE'S A SURPRISE! I'VE REWORKED CHEF'S KISS AS AN ORIGINAL FIC AND POSTED IT ONLINE AS AN ORIGINAL WORK HERE - [Chef's Kiss](https://tapas.io/series/Chefs-Kiss). PLEASE GO SUPPORT IT IF YOU LIKED THE STORY!

* * *

Xiao Zhan sat back in the balcony swing, his morning coffee in one hand and book ready in the other. The book had several post-its poking out from various sections, marking important passages and filled with his scribbled musings. Just as he was about to take a sip and dig into his notes to prepare himself for the event later that night, his phone pinged.

> _Bo-di: [media attachment]_

Xiao Zhan did a double take on seeing a message from Yibo. 

_Isn’t he with his TTXS brothers right now?_

Curiosity took over and he put his mug and book aside. As soon as he opened the chat and clicked on the clip attachment, a video boomed to life and a woman’s voice spoke.

“My CP is definitely real.” 

“Ah, not possible,” Yibo’s low voice replied in an unamused, almost exasperated, manner.

Xiao Zhan watched himself in the video as he sat beside Yibo and looked at the camera and replied as well.

“Right!”

He curled his lips inward at the line he knew was coming next. Sure enough, in the very next second, he gave a mischievous smile to the camera and added-

“The officials will hit us for that!!” Not making it clear if he meant that they would be slapped for talking about a cp they were in or being in a real cp.

“Really impossible,” Yibo repeated with a slight shake of his head and an ambiguous smile of his own.

Xiao Zhan let out a snort and shook his head in amusement when the short clip ended. 

> _Xiao Zhan: ??  
>    
>  Bo-di: Maybe we should show them this clip again _😏 _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Show this clip to who? I’m very confused.  
>    
>  Bo-di: To the people who did this  
>    
>  Bo-di: [media attachment] _

With a resigned sigh, Xiao Zhan opened the second clip and his eyes nearly popped out of their sockets when the audio blared jarringly loud. It was a video of a truck with images of Yibo on it. And the jarringly loud noise was his own voice, repeating over and over again-

“Wang Yibo, happy birthday!”

Followed by a short snippet of the song ‘Nan Hai’.

“What the-” Xiao Zhan winced and lowered the volume on his phone as the video kept playing. 

Towards the end, he could hear Yibo stifling his cackle as he recorded the video of the truck from inside his SUV.

> _Xiao Zhan: What is this?!  
>    
>  Bo-di: Guess _😏 _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: No. They didn’t.  
>    
>  Bo-di: They did  
>    
>  Bo-di: They hired a birthday truck for me and the audio on it is your voice from when you wished me on set last summer  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: You mean last to last summer  
>    
>  Bo-di: Shit…yeah  
>    
>  Bo-di: Wow. Time flies!  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: The cp fans are something, huh?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Yep _😅 _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Sorry if it got too weird for you_😅 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: There are worse things that have happened on my birthday than having Xiao-laoshi’s angelic voice wishing me over and over again from across the street_😋 

Xiao Zhan’s smile faltered for a brief second as he remembered the hate Yibo had received during his birthday live stream that summer they were together for shooting A-Ling. But, as was the case each time he reminisced over that summer, the smile returned tenfold at the happier memories that flooded through his mind immediately. 

His mind immediately flooded with all the memories from the set of A-Ling and his banter with Xiao Zhan. He let out a chuckle as he reminisced over the things they would do to keep themselves distracted and occupied enough to not feel the heat, the exhaustion, the boredom during the endless shoots and long breaks in between the takes. 

> _Xiao Zhan: Lao Wang! Are we starting again?  
>    
>  Bo-di: _😏 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: I miss that summer, ge  
>    
>  _

Xiao Zhan sighed and sat back in the swing. 

> _Xiao Zhan: I miss it too, everything seemed simpler then, didn’t it?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Except my heartbreaking crush on you that I just could not understand at the time!  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: I think everyone around us had a better clue about our crushes than we did ourselves!  
>    
>  Bo-di: So much time wasted! Tsk tsk!  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: But we made it  
>    
>  Bo-di: Yeah, we did_😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Are you ready for the event tonight?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: As ready as I can be  
>    
>  Bo-di: You’ll do great, don’t be nervous_😘 _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: When do you leave Changsha for BAH shooting?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Later tonight.  
>    
>  Bo-di: Sucks that I won’t be able to spend my birthday with you  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: I promise we’ll do something special when you’re back home_😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Hmm...don’t you have the dinner thing as well tonight?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Yeah, with the theater group  
>    
>  Bo-di: Okay, I have to go now, ge…Han-ge is calling me…talk to you later!  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Love you  
>    
>  Bo-di: Love you more  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Not possible! _

* * *

The evening’s event went very well. Xiao Zhan felt completely at ease talking with the artists on stage. He had thought he would feel intimidated but after the first question, everything seemed to flow and the interview seemed more like a chat. 

Afterwards, he joined the cast for dinner in a small intimate setting. As he sat around the circular table beside Wan Fang, he marvelled at how merry everyone was, how lively, how present. He even managed to smile and laugh along as the night turned towards singing and karaoke. 

Xiao Zhan laughed and clapped along as the cast belted song after song, enjoying the light atmosphere as the night progressed. Suddenly, he felt his phone ping and he checked to see a message from Yibo.

> _Bo-di: Couldn’t bear to be away from you any longer  
>    
>  Bo-di: So I flew here for one night _😏 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: I’m waiting in the car outside, ge  
>    
>  Bo-di: Can you leave? _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The CP video that Yibo shares in the chap  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PCg8ZhG6Mv0&feature=youtu.be&t=905&ab_channel=wearebojunyixiao
> 
> July 31 day - Yibo bday truck  
> https://twitter.com/Ventus1821/status/1289395060396552197?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/furrymoran/status/1288899164986695681?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/kiitprachaya/status/1289177455333261312?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/BjyxObsessed/status/1289234884729483270?s=20
> 
> July 31 evening - XZ interview, song, stage play interview  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHQkwlRJdWo&t=1s  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1289369173324263425?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/jalpari_yizhan/status/1289323943451451393?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/SenoritaXX1/status/1289353756300083201?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/SenoritaXX1/status/1289381810472796160?s=20


	280. Let's go home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO HERE'S A SURPRISE! I'VE REWORKED CHEF'S KISS AS AN ORIGINAL FIC AND POSTED IT ONLINE AS AN ORIGINAL WORK HERE - [Chef's Kiss](https://tapas.io/series/Chefs-Kiss). PLEASE GO SUPPORT IT IF YOU LIKED THE STORY!

* * *

Xiao Zhan looked around the room and bit his lips. Before he could hesitate any further, he cleared his throat and leaned in to Wan Fang. 

“Laoshi, I-I need to excuse myself for the rest of the night,” Xiao Zhan spoke softly.

“Is it time for you to leave already?!” Wan Fang clucked her tongue in fond disappointment.

“Sorry, laoshi…but thank you so much for inviting me. This was a wonderful experience for me,” Xiao Zhan beamed at the smiling lady. 

“Alright then, young boy,” she patted his shoulder. “I’ll see you again soon I hope. We should keep in touch. Maybe one day we can collaborate and you can do some theater work!”

“I would love that,” Xiao Zhan smiled and held her hand in both of his. “It would be my absolute honor.”

* * *

Yibo sat at the steering wheel of his car as he waited for Xiao Zhan’s reply.

_Maybe this was a stupid idea._ He thought to himself. _Ge is busy with the theater people. I shouldn't be barging in on his-_

But before he could complete his thought, he heard a knock on his window. He rolled the window down and smiled when he saw Xiao Zhan bending down and leaning into the car.

“Hey, stranger,” Xiao Zhan spoke in a low voice, not smiling in return. “Looking for a good time tonight?”

Yibo’s smile vanished when he noticed the way Xiao Zhan scanned him from head to toe through the window.

_Oh. Roleplay._ Yibo’s mind reeled and his heart began racing with excitement. 

“Uhh…yes?” He ventured and leaned over the window and smirked at Xiao Zhan. “Are you gonna show me one?”

Xiao Zhan placed both hands on top of the car and bent forward, bringing his face closer to Yibo’s.

“Depends...can you afford it?” Xiao Zhan whispered and licked his lips, his breath warm on Yibo’s face. 

“Money isn’t a problem,” Yibo eyed Xiao Zhan’s lips and whispered back. “I’ll give you whatever you ask for ten times over.”

“In that case,” Xiao Zhan leaned in closer until his lips were tickling Yibo’s ear, “I’m your man.”

Yibo gulped as Xiao Zhan walked around the car and got in the passenger seat. 

“Your place or mine?” Yibo smirked.

“Drive,” Xiao Zhan smirked back.

They drove in silence except for when Xiao Zhan gave Yibo instructions to drive. Yibo eyed the dark empty alley that Xiao Zhan had led them to and stopped the car when he was told to do so. 

Xiao Zhan’s eyes trailed down Yibo’s body before his hands snaked their way to his zipper. Yibo’s breath hitched when Xiao Zhan unzipped his pants and slid a hand inside to pull out his partial erection. 

Yibo looked around and was about to say something when Xiao Zhan bent down and took his dick in his mouth in one fell swoop. Yibo gasped and hissed, one hand slamming against the window and the other grabbing Xiao Zhan’s hair.

Xiao Zhan worked Yibo in his mouth, sparing him no mercy, moving harder and faster almost immediately. Yibo moaned and fell back against the driver’s seat as Xiao Zhan kept up the motion.

“Aah,” he gasped when Xiao Zhan buried his face in his lap, deep throating him a few times. “Fuck…”

When Yibo came, Xiao Zhan swallowed it all. Yibo slumped in his seat as Xiao Zhan wiped the corner of his mouth. 

“You’re tasty,” Xiao Zhan grinned.

“Fuck,” was all Yibo could say as he sat back, breathless and satiated.

“Yes,” Xiao Zhan ran a finger down his sweaty face, “now that too.”

“I have lube in the suitcase in the trunk,” Yibo muttered when he finally caught his breath.

“Get in the backseat with it then,” Xiao Zhan smirked and got out of the passenger’s seat. 

Yibo rushed to the trunk and dug out the lube. When he entered the backseat, Xiao Zhan yanked him in by the collar and flipped him around. He dragged down their pants and got behind him. 

“Oh by the way,” Xiao Zhan huffed as he began preparing Yibo, “my name is Sean.”

“I’m…ah,” Yibo shuddered under his touch, “I’m Bo.”

“Nice to fuck you, Bo,” Xiao Zhan scissored him open from behind. 

Yibo collapsed into a puddle as Xiao Zhan massaged him in his favorite spot over and over again. When he was finally ready, Xiao Zhan coated himself with more lube and lined up.

“Ready, _Bo?”_ Xiao Zhan chuckled as he teased Yibo’s entrance. 

“Just fuck me already, _Sean_ ,” Yibo raised his hips and pushed backwards.

With another grin, Xiao Zhan pushed into Yibo slowly and began fucking him. The car began fogging up and sweat dripped off Xiao Zhan onto Yibo’s bare hips. Xiao Zhan fucked him raw, wasting no time. 

Yibo grabbed onto the seat to try and perch himself but the space was cramped and Xiao Zhan was ramming into him with full thrusts. His senses were overwhelmed as Xiao Zhan’s hands grabbed at him as he fucked him endlessly. 

“You’re so nice and tight, Bo,” Xiao Zhan growled and thrust forward mercilessly. 

As the minutes passed them by, the space heated up with their joint bodies moving in unison. Yibo moaned helplessly as Xiao Zhan pushed him against the backseat over and over again.

“Sean!” Yibo groaned as he came against the car seat, followed soon after by Xiao Zhan. 

Xiao Zhan fucked him through their orgasms, wringing them for every drop they were worth. When they were spent, he fell down on the seat and pulled out carefully. Xiao Zhan reached forward for the tissues kept in front and wiped Yibo and the seat clean.

“That was…” Yibo turned around and cuddled against Xiao Zhan’s chest.

“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan sighed and wrapped his arm around Yibo, pulling him closer. 

“We should get moving before someone gets suspicious of a car parked in an empty alley like this!” Yibo chuckled.

“We should…yeah,” Xiao Zhan laughed along. 

Yibo tilted his face up at Xiao Zhan and smiled, all blissed out. 

“Hi,” Yibo murmured.

“Hey,” Xiao Zhan rubbed their noses together before planting a kiss on Yibo’s nose. 

“I missed you,” Yibo whispered and pecked Xiao Zhan’s lips. 

“I’m glad you came for the night,” Xiao Zhan whispered back.

“Me too,” Yibo replied. 

“Now let’s go home so I can give you your birthday gifts!” Xiao Zhan sat them up and spoke excitedly.

“So the roleplay and car sex weren’t it?” Yibo grinned mischievously. 

“Of course not!” Xiao Zhan smacked his elbow playfully and laughed. 

“What is my gift, ge?!” Yibo asked as he pulled up his pants quickly. 

“Let’s go home and you’ll find out,” Xiao Zhan grinned smugly in return.


	281. Ready to head to set?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEW YIZHAN AMNESIA AU - [Forget me not ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28303131)\- do check it out!
> 
> Story summary: Xiao Zhan decides to take in a stranger who suffers from amnesia after saving him from a mugging gone wrong.

* * *

“Wow,” Yibo gasped when he opened the boxes Xiao Zhan placed in front of him. “All these are for me?”

“Well, you liked the ox necklace so much, I decided to buy you some more necklaces to wear…and I couldn’t choose between these so I…bought all of them!” Xiao Zhan chuckled. “And I got a matching chain for me for one of them!”

“I love them, ge!” Yibo leapt forward and hugged Xiao Zhan. “I’m gonna wear them all!”

“Hopefully not all together!” Xiao Zhan teased but his words fell silent when Yibo’s lips enveloped his lips.

Yibo scrambled onto Xiao Zhan’s lap and straddled him as he kissed him senseless. 

“So you really liked them, huh?” Xiao Zhan grinned when Yibo finally pulled back.

“I love them,” Yibo whispered and rubbed their noses together. 

“I love you,” Xiao Zhan whispered back and kissed his nose.

“I love you more,” Yibo smiled, knowing well what was coming next.

“Not possible,” Xiao Zhan smiled back before sealing their lips together again. 

* * *

Yibo left for his shoots again early the next morning.

> _Bo-di: So when do you go on set for the military drama?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: In a few days  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: But what I’m more excited about is the launch of your official studio finally!  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m excited too!  
>    
>  Bo-di: One small step closer to being more independent in my career as well  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Finally!  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m excited about using your designed panther as my logo_😘 _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Glad to be of service_😘😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: You know, ge, you can still have a design career in parallel  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: I know…I’ve been thinking about it a lot recently  
>    
>  Bo-di: Not thinking about leaving the entertainment industry again, are you?!  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: No! Like you said...in parallel! _😘 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Okay, good...and which day did you say you were going on set?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: This is the second time you’re asking_😶 _  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Everything okay?  
>    
>  Bo-di: I’m just curious about your schedule  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Wang Yibo?  
>    
>  Bo-di: Okay, okay…I’m a little worried  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Is it because I’m returning to a set after so long?  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: I just filmed the covid drama, you know  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: I’ll be fine_😉 _  
>   
>  Bo-di: Okay, I have to board my flight now, ge  
>    
>  Xiao Zhan: Have a safe flight, sweetie  
>    
>  Bo-di: See you soon, ge  
>    
>  _

Xiao Zhan stared at the message and got the feeling that that was not all there was to Yibo’s questioning of his schedule but he decided not to press the matter.

* * *

A few days later, when he reached the shooting location and lodging of the military drama, Ace Troops, he got a message from Yibo. He was about to reply when someone called out to him.

“Xiao Zhan!”

Xiao Zhan looked up from his phone and noticed Huang Jingyu coming his way with a wave.

“Huang Jingyu!” Xiao Zhan smiled and bowed in greeting.

“Call me Johny, Xiao Zhan,” Huang Jingyu laughed and bowed in return.

When they straightened, he extended his hand and shook hands with Xiao Zhan while placing a hand on his shoulder for a quick pat.

“It’s so cool to finally meet you in person!” Johny smiled wide. “Are you also heading to your room?”

“Yes,” Xiao Zhan turned towards the direction Johny was gesturing in and began walking in step with him. 

“I think our rooms are close together!” Johny beamed and led the way. 

Xiao Zhan smiled politely and followed him the rest of the way as he spoke about how excited he was to begin the shooting. Once they reached their rooms, they realized they were staying beside each other.

“Oh, that’s cool if we want to run lines and rehearse,” Johny exclaimed as they unlocked their respective rooms. 

After bidding him goodbye for the time being, Xiao Zhan closed the door behind him and took his phone out. There were three missed calls from Yibo. Suddenly panicked, Xiao Zhan dialled his number and called him back hurriedly. 

“Hello, Yibo…are you okay?” Xiao Zhan asked immediately. 

“Ge, I’m fine. Why?” Yibo answered.

“You called me thrice!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed. 

“Oh…I just wanted to make sure you reached, okay?” Came Yibo’s reply. 

“Yes, sweetie…I did,” Xiao Zhan shook his head fondly. “I just got to my room.”

“Oh, cool…have you met any of the other cast yet?”

Xiao Zhan paused what he was doing and blinked.

“Yes, actually…” he replied slowly. “I met Johny…Huang Jingyu.”

“Oh, you did? Is he there now with you?”

“No, I’m in my room,” Xiao Zhan replied carefully. “Is everything okay? You’ve been asking a lot about this shoot lately.”

“Yeah, just want to make sure you’re comfortable returning to set.”

“Of course, I am,” Xiao Zhan chuckled. “Johny was very welcoming.”

“I bet he was,” Yibo muttered. 

“What?”

“What?”

“What did you say?”

“Nothing.”

Xiao Zhan sat down on the bed with a sigh and spoke after a few seconds of silence from Yibo.

“Yibo…what’s the actual reason you’re checking up on me so much?”

“Nothing, ge…I…I have to go now, break time’s over.”

“Yibo…are you insecure because of Johny?”

“No.”

“Yibo?”

“Okay, fine…yes!” Yibo suddenly exclaimed loudly. 

“Why, sweetie?”

“He just…he has a reputation…”

“What kind of reputation?”

“He’s always been linked to all his co-stars, ge.”

Xiao Zhan couldn't help the light laugh that escaped his lips. 

“You’re laughing?!” Yibo exclaimed. 

“Baby…sweetie,” Xiao Zhan spoke in a soft voice, “this is not a BL show...we’re not cast opposite each other...we won’t have to do cp fanservice or any such thing.”

“You can’t be sure of that.”

“And even if there is fan service involved…it’s just a job, remember?”

“Mn.”

“Yibo?”

“If he tries anything with you,” Yibo spoke suddenly, “you tell him we’re together.”

Xiao Zhan laughed and shook his head.

“I’m serious, ge.”

“Okay…okay…my baby lion,” Xiao Zhan stopped his laugh. “I will do that if he tries anything.”

“Promise?”

“Of course I promise,” Xiao Zhan smiled. “Open secret, remember?”

“Okay.”

“Now don’t worry about me.”

Just then there was a knock on Xiao Zhan’s hotel room door. 

“One sec, sweetie…hold on.”

“Okay…”

Xiao Zhan walked to the door and opened it. On the other side, Johny stood with a smile on his face.

“Hello there!” Johny beamed. “Ready to head to set?”


	282. You look like you've seen a ghost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy new year everybody!! thank you for sticking with this fic through all its ups and downs! and please keep the comments coming! they really are the main thing that keep me motivated to write this more and more! hope everyone's 2021 is safer, healthier, happier!

* * *

Weeks passed by as Xiao Zhan spent his time on the Ace troops set. On the other hand, Yibo’s show SDOC was doing incredibly well. Xiao Zhan made sure he caught all of Yibo’s parts whenever he had the chance. 

> _Xiao Zhan: How many candies are you going to give out in your hotpot time on SDOC, Bo-di?!  
>   
>  Bo-di: As many as it takes to keep our cp fans happy _😋 _  
>   
> Xiao Zhan: Or is that just your way of making up for how close you’re getting with some of the dancers?_ 🤨 _  
>   
> Bo-di: Are you jealous, Zhan-ge?_ 😍 _  
>   
> Xiao Zhan: I can never understand how you expect me to be okay with all your dancers feeling you up and getting all chummy with you when you can’t even handle my friendship with one co-star!_ 😣 _  
>   
> Bo-di: Sorry, Zhan-ge! They’re all professionals, I promise!  
>   
>  _

Xiao Zhan smiled and shook his head at the phone. 

> _Xiao Zhan: I know, Bo-di! I trust you  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: And you should trust me  
>   
>  Bo-di: I do trust you, I just don’t trust others  
>   
>  _

Xiao Zhan sighed and rolled his eyes. 

> _Xiao Zhan: Trusting me should be enough  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: And don’t you, like, know Johny from before!?  
>   
>  Bo-di: Yeah, we’ve met several times...he even came on TTXS recently with Ayunga-ge  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Why are you still insecure then?  
>   
>  Bo-di: He just comes on very strong, ge!  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Anyway, I need to head back now  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: Let’s try and video tonight, it’s been a few days since I’ve seen my gouzaizai  
>   
>  Bo-di: Okay! I miss you too by the way...tons!  
>   
>  _

Xiao Zhan put his phone aside and headed for the shot.

_My silly gouzaizai._ He thought fondly. _God I miss him so much!_

“Xiao Zhan!” Johny called out as Xiao Zhan approached the set once again, interrupting his thoughts. “Or should I call you Zhan-ge?” He teased. 

“How many times have I told you, you don’t need to call me Zhan-ge,” Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes and laughed. “You’re my senior in the industry, _Johny-ge_ ,” he teased back. 

“But you’re my senior in life, _Zhan-ge,_ ” Johny nudged Xiao Zhan with his shoulder. 

“Only by one year!” Xiao Zhan feigned exasperation.

“Alright, alright,” Johny laughed and nodded along, “Zhan-Zhan it is. By the way,” he continued, “do you follow that show, street dance of china?”

“Uhh, yeah…I’ve watched parts of it,” Xiao Zhan replied as casually as he could.

“Oh man!” Johny exclaimed. “That show is so dope. Those dancers are so talented. I’m rooting for Yibo! What about you?”

“Oh!” Xiao Zhan chuckled. “Me too!”

“Of course, you two are friends, right?” Johny asked as their make up artists surrounded them for touch ups.

“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan shrugged.

“That’s cool…how about we watch the next episode together some time?” 

“Sure!” Xiao Zhan nodded and then they proceeded to run their lines while the scene was being set up. 

* * *

A few days into September, Xiao Zhan was halfway done with the shoot of Ace Troops. He had been travelling for other ad shoots and promotional interviews for the covid drama and slowly feeling like his career was resuming normalcy with lesser worries for antis with each passing week. 

When he got back to his hotel room, he received a text from Johny.

> _Johny Huang: Did you see the latest SDOC episode? Yibo has been trending for it!_

Xiao Zhan smiled and thought back on all the times Yibo had trended due to his appearances on SDOC. 

> _Xiao Zhan: What is he trending for now?  
>   
>  Johny Huang: For the way he danced with another male dancer on the show!  
>   
>  _

Xiao Zhan frowned but before he could think anything else, there was a knock on his door.

“Johny?” Xiao Zhan exclaimed when he answered the door.

“Yibo is one crazy dude!” Johny exclaimed in response with a bright smile on his face as he entered the room excitedly. 

“Come on in,” Xiao Zhan muttered to himself sarcastically as Johny made himself comfortable on Xiao Zhan’s bed. 

“You have to see this,” Johny laughed out loud, seemingly engrossed in something on his phone to notice Xiao Zhan’s surprise at his over familiarity. 

Curiosity got the better of Xiao Zhan and he stood beside Johny and looked over his shoulder at his phone. Johny played the video again and Xiao Zhan watched as one of the whackers, Xiao Bao, danced in the battle round.

“He’s pretty good,” Xiao Zhan smiled. _And he’s very sweet in person as well from what Yibo told me._

“Wait for it,” Johny smirked.

Xiao Zhan watched as Xiao Bao danced around the other contestants and captains. He admired his attitude and was smiling when suddenly he noticed him head towards Yibo. 

“Wait for it,” Johny repeated, giddy with excitement. 

Xiao Zhan felt everything stop when Xiao Bao touched Yibo. It still took him a few seconds to recover every time some dancer came too close to Yibo which happened a lot on the show. The one move where several male dancers felt him up as he pretended to sit pretty between them had taken him several minutes to get over. But he always managed to remind himself of the nature of street dance and dance in general and he would calm down eventually. 

But this time, what he saw in the video made his gut clench. Yibo invaded the personal space of the dancer and held him close by placing one hand on the back of his neck. The audience was going wild and the other dancers were hooting like crazy. Johny exploded into laughter and replayed the entire section where Yibo followed Xiao Bao around the dance floor and made lewd faces at him over and over again, commenting on how bold and fun Yibo was. 

_Is this what he was referring to when he said Xiao Bao challenged him in one battle and whacked back in return?_ Xiao Zhan recollected Yibo describing a particularly exhilarating battle after shooting once. _But he never mentioned just how close and intimate he got with Xiao Bao._

“Yibo gives no fucks! He is living his best life!!” Johny exclaimed happily when he finally put his phone away. 

“Huh?” Xiao Zhan tried paying attention to what he was saying through the hazy torment of his own thoughts. 

“I mean look at him! He’s done so much gay stuff on this show, it’s amazing!” Johny barked out another laughter. “He’s clearly single and enjoying his gay ass amidst all those dancers! He must be hooking up like crazy! Good for him!!”

“What?” Xiao Zhan managed to mumble through his rising confusion. 

“Oh come on, Zhan-Zhan,” Johny patted his shoulder, “don’t be naive. It’s very common in the industry. Co-stars hooking up. And these are hip hop dancers, they’re cool and chilled out and very open. Look at how lively Yibo is in this show. He’s clearly having a lot of fun around them!”

Xiao Zhan grabbed Johny’s phone and replayed the video once more. He paused it several times and observed Yibo’s face and body and actions and expressions over and over until it got too much.

His mind grew numb and blank and he didn't know what to think. Johny’s smile began fading once he noticed Xiao Zhan’s expression.

“Hey, are you okay?” Johny asked and placed a hand on Xiao Zhan’s arm. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost!”

“No,” Xiao Zhan sat down on the bed beside Johny, “I’m not okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the video -  
> https://twitter.com/uniq5s/status/1304751267596574727?s=20
> 
> also, new chapters are up for ["forget me not"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28303131%22)! check out the fic if you haven't!


	283. It's never soon enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> check out the new chapters of ['Forget me not'](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28303131). Final chapter will be out today in a few hours!

* * *

“Zhan-Zhan,” Johny turned to face Xiao Zhan. “What happened?”

“No-nothing,” Xiao Zhan sat still. 

“Your face doesn’t look like nothing happened,” Johny replied, voice laced with concern. “Are you upset about the video?!” 

“N-no,” Xiao Zhan stuttered.

“Oh, Zhan-Zhan, you really are too pure for this industry,” Johny chuckled and nudged Xiao Zhan’s shoulder.

“That’s not it,” Xiao Zhan grew irritated and sighed. “I didn’t like the way you talked about Yibo. He is a professional and would never behave a certain way-”

“If it’s mutually consensual, then there is nothing unprofessional about colleagues hooking up, Zhan-Zhan,” Johny snickered.

“Yibo is not hooking up with them!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed loudly suddenly, his head ringing with his own thoughts.

“Okay, okay...jeez...why are you so worked up over that?!” Johny tried to pacify the visibly angry man. 

“Because he is not single!” Xiao Zhan erupted as he stood up and blurted out. 

“Oh-” Johny stood up as well.

“He is with me!” Xiao Zhan blurted yet again and then widened his eyes as he realized what he had said.

“Oh!” Johny looked at Xiao Zhan in shock. “I am sorry, Xiao Zhan. I didn't know. And I didn’t mean-”

“You didn’t mean what you said about his single behaviour and hooking up with the dancers?” Xiao Zhan asked, incensed. 

“It was just an observation based on the assumption that he’s single,” Johny conceded.

“And now that you know he’s not single. What do you make of his behaviour now?” Xiao Zhan asked, suddenly unsure and uncertain.

“To be completely honest, if it was my boyfriend,” Johny took in a deep breath and continued, “I would think he’s crossed a line.”

“Well, good thing he’s not your boyfriend, because I trust my boyfriend completely and I...I know he meant nothing when he did that,” Xiao Zhan spoke defensively.

“Are you saying that to convince me or to convince yourself?” Johny asked with a tilt of his head.

“I...I...don’t need to convince anyone,” Xiao Zhan replied with a shaking voice. “I trust Yibo.”

“All I’m saying is…” Johny spoke gently, “that I don't want to see you get hurt.”

“I’m...I’m really tired right now. I think I’ll call it a night,” Xiao Zhan spoke as politely as he could.

“Okay, I’ll see myself out...and once again, I’m so sorry Zhan-Zhan,” Johny nodded and took his leave. 

Xiao Zhan felt a sudden need to see Yibo, to touch him, to feel him. He checked the time and decided to video call Yibo. As the call rang and no one answered, Xiao Zhan grew more and more agitated.

He chucked the phone on the bed and groaned.

“Wang Yibo!” He grunted into the room.

As if hearing his call, Yibo video called him back at that instant. Xiao Zhan answered the call immediately. He scrambled onto the bed as he spoke.

“Yibo!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed. “What the fuck?”

“Oh...so you saw it trend?” Yibo answered.

“Of course I did! You didn't tell me how close you were to that whacker when you battled him!!”

“Wait, what? Oh…”

“Oh what?”

“I thought you were talking about the other thing,” Yibo sighed and covered his eyes.

“What other thing?”

“Xiao Bao got asked about me during his livestream and he ‘clarified’ to everyone that I should not be shipped with him and that I’m ‘straight’.”

“What? Oh, I didn’t even see that. Johny showed me your battle with him and-”

“Johny showed you that? Why would he do that?”

“We had decided to watch the show together since we both follow it and cheer for _you._ ”

“And he decided to show you the one clip that has me dancing with someone else...how convenient!” Yibo growled.

“Yibo! You were trending for it!!”

“Are you mad at me, ge?”

“I’m mad that I had to find out this happened from someone else, and not from you. You should have told me the nature of your battle after you shot it. I was completely caught off guard! It was so embarrassing!”

“Why was it embarrassing, ge?”

“Because Johny was going on about how you’re behaving single and...ahh...it doesn’t matter...you should have warned me about it.”

“Single behavior!? I...ge…” Yibo suddenly looked at him, worried. “Are you doubting me?”

“I trust you, Bo-di!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed. “I just wish I had known what to expect. It didn't make it any easier to watch. Imagine yourself in my place. Would you have been okay with watching me cozying up to someone like that in the name of dance?”

“I-” Yibo began but then paused for a moment, “No.”

“Exactly.”

“Sorry, ge...I should have told you-”

“Take off your clothes,” Xiao Zhan suddenly spoke.

“What?”

“I need you right fucking now,” Xiao Zhan growled.

Yibo’s eyes turned dark and he bit his lower lip as he placed the phone against the night stand, giving Xiao Zhan the entire view of his bed and him on it. Xiao Zhan did the same and then slowly began taking off his clothes.

Yibo watched as Xiao Zhan took off his t-shirt and boxers and finally his underwear. He removed his clothes in a hurry, not wanting to miss a single moment of Xiao Zhan’s strip. They both knelt on their beds, eyes trained on the video chat. 

“Touch your body, Bo-di…” Xiao Zhan rasped. 

Yibo did as he was told and Xiao Zhan began stroking himself. He watched as Yibo’s hands ran down his body, stopping at his nipples, playing with them, pinching them. Yibo gasped softly as Xiao Zhan stroked himself harder. 

“Touch yourself for me,” Xiao Zhan spoke in a low, rumbling voice. 

Yibo’s hands rushed to comply. He touched his erection, rubbing his thumb over the leaking head, spreading precum on it to ease the slide of his hand. He tugged harder as he saw Xiao Zhan stroke himself harder, faster, his eyes raking over every inch of Xiao Zhan’s naked body. 

As they pleasured themselves, eyes fixed on each other, Xiao Zhan couldn’t help but ask for more.

“Say you love me,” Xiao Zhan panted as his hand began working at a frantic pace.

“I love you...and only you,” Yibo replied, his own hands moving fervently.

With that, Xiao Zhan came spurting into his hand, letting out a loud moan. 

“Next time,” Xiao Zhan sighed, breathless, “I want to come inside you...I want to fill you up.”

Yibo followed soon after and fell back on the bed. They cleaned themselves with tissues and then both took their phones in their hands once more and stared at each other’s faces.

“I’m sorry, ge,” Yibo exhaled. 

“I’m sorry too,” Xiao Zhan sighed.

“What are you sorry for?”

“In my anger, I told Johny about us...to stop him from talking that way about you.”

“You did?!” Yibo perked up and his smile widened. “Good!”

“Brat!” Xiao Zhan chuckled. “It’s not good...it was careless of me to mention it so directly.”

“I don't care. I want the whole world to know if I had my way.”

“Me too, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan smiled.

“That’s why it bothered me so much when Xiao Bao told everyone I’m straight. He has no right to!”

“The poor guy must have been flustered with the questions from your fans. Maybe that was his way of protecting you. Let it be.”

“That’s what my team said too...that we should let it be.”

“Good,” Xiao Zhan replied. “Just a few more weeks and I’ll see you again.”

“It’s not soon enough,” Yibo pouted. 

“It’s never soon enough,” Xiao Zhan smiled and blew a kiss at Yibo. 

“Keep the video on while we fall asleep tonight?” Yibo asked softly.

“Anything for you,” Xiao Zhan replied lovingly.

Soon, they fell asleep to the sound of each other's breathing as the video call ran through the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> links -  
> https://twitter.com/uniq5s/status/1304751267596574727?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/madetoloveXZ/status/1304848898658164736?s=20


	284. This lovely surprise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay guys. so i just realized that yesterday ytty turned one year old! i can't believe it's been a year since i started writing this story. to commemorate this milestone, i am hosting a group video call with you, my readers. 
> 
> if anyone is interested, please fill out this [google form](https://forms.gle/ux9NqvvqK8QkoMcq7). 
> 
> no pressure to join and do this! this is just for fun so we can chat about ytty, yizhan, and anything else you want! please respond by jan 29th!

* * *

The month of September went by in a blur and before they knew it, it was almost at its end. Xiao Zhan’s shoot moved from Nanjing to Hangzhou, a few hours drive from Shanghai, where Yibo was still shooting SDOC. 

Yibo decided to surprise Xiao Zhan one evening, seeing as the drive was only for two hours. When he left the hustle and bustle of Shanghai and the hordes of his fans that crowded his car, Yibo felt a tinge of excitement at the thought of seeing Xiao Zhan after weeks and weeks of separation. Even if just for a few hours. He had to be back in Shanghai that same night.

As they drove to Hangzhou, Yibo resisted the urge to message Xiao Zhan and inform him of arrival. His team had informed Yibo that Xiao Zhan would be done early today. He kept his phone aside and tried to get some much needed rest.

_One and a half hours and I’ll be with Zhan-ge._ Yibo thought serenely as he began to doze off. 

* * *

Xiao Zhan wrapped up early for the day and headed back to his room. To say he was tired was an understatement. The shoot was physically challenging and despite his workout regimen, took a toll on him.

_Ugh! I still have the photoshoot with my team now._ Xiao Zhan thought with a whine.

He changed into the clothes he had been instructed and with a long sigh, messaged his manager that he was ready. As he walked to the car that was waiting for him, he texted Yibo. 

> _Xiao Zhan: Miss you  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: How’s the dance shoot going?  
>   
>  Xiao Zhan: I can’t believe we’re only two hours away and still can’t meet! _

When Xiao Zhan reached the location of the photoshoot, however, he was pleasantly surprised by its serenity. It was filled with greenery and was by a beautiful lake. Xiao Zhan took in a deep inhale and wished that Yibo was by his side to share the gorgeous scenery.

He was in denim overalls and a sleeveless white top and they were going to do a photoshoot to get photos for when the studio would post on Xiao Zhan’s birthday. Hangzhou had a beautiful lake and the team thought it would be a good opportunity to conduct the photoshoot. 

They would go to several beautiful natural locations over the course of the next few days to take several photos. The place they had chosen today was pretty isolated and just by the lake. Xiao Zhan breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that no fans were around as they went about the photoshoot.

An hour later, he could see his team talking among themselves as he waited.

“What happened?” Xiao Zhan called out to his assistant. “Everything okay?”

“Yes, laoban,” his bodyguard replied instead. “Everything is okay!”

But their barely concealed excitement told Xiao Zhan another story. He raised an eyebrow and walked towards the huddled team members - his assistant, his bodyguard, and the studio photographer. 

“What are you guys hiding?” Xiao Zhan asked in a mock stern tone.

“Me,” a familiar voice replied.

Xiao Zhan froze as the group separated and showed Yibo standing behind them with a cake in his hand. 

“Yibo? Wha-”

“Since we won’t be together for your birthday this year,” Yibo smiled and walked towards Xiao Zhan, cake in hand, “I thought we could celebrate it a little early this year...together.”

Xiao Zhan covered his mouth with his hand in surprise as Yibo lit the sparkler candle on the cake that was covered in white frosting - simple and beautiful.

“Come on, Zhan-ge,” Yibo whispered as he came close and placed a chaste kiss on Xiao Zhan’s cheek. “Make a wish.”

The photographer caught the moment perfectly and the assistant whipped out her phone to take a video.

Xiao Zhan blushed as Yibo kissed him on his nose before handing him the cake. He looked at his team, grateful for them and then gazed at Yibo. His Yibo. Who had driven all the way here to surprise him for an early birthday. His Yibo. Who probably had squeezed out a few hours to be here and do this. His Yibo. Who looked at him with smiling eyes as if he wasn’t too exhausted to be doing this. 

Xiao Zhan closed his eyes and made a wish. 

_Please take care of my Yibo. And make me his...in every lifetime._

When Xiao Zhan opened his eyes, Yibo took out the sparkler candle from the cake and moved it in circles in the air. 

“Happy birthday in advance, Zhan-ge!” Yibo exclaimed as he played with the sparkler. 

Xiao Zhan smiled brightly as he handed the cake to his assistant and rushed into Yibo’s waiting arms. 

“Thank you,” Xiao Zhan whispered as he hugged Yibo tightly. 

“Happy birthday, Xiao-ge!” The assistant cheered.

“Happy birthday, laoban!” His bodyguard and photographer exclaimed together. 

“Now, everyone close their eyes,” Xiao Zhan announced. “I want to kiss my fiance!”

Yibo’s eyes widened as the team snickered and giggled and closed their eyes. 

“Really?” Yibo whispered as Xiao Zhan leaned in.

“Really,” Xiao Zhan whispered back before closing the distance between them.

He enveloped Yibo’s lips in a soft, tantalizing kiss before diving in deeper. They kissed for several seconds before Xiao Zhan pulled away.

“Okay, you can open your eyes now,” he laughed.

Yibo blushed as the team did as they were told and grinned at him with knowing smiles. 

“Thank you everyone for this lovely surprise,” Xiao Zhan addressed his team.

“It was Yibo’s idea,” the assistant smiled and handed Yibo a piece of cake.

Yibo took the slice and offered it to Xiao Zhan who took a small bite.

“I’m on a strict diet and workout regimen,” Xiao Zhan explained sheepishly when he refused to take a second bite.

“I can see that,” Yibo commented and raked his eyes down Xiao Zhan’s body.

“When do you have to leave?” Xiao Zhan recognized the look on Yibo’s face. “Do you have time to come by the hotel?”

“I have a few hours,” Yibo nodded eagerly, “...have to be in Shanghai by 10 pm.”

“Good,” Xiao Zhan entwined their fingers and squeezed Yibo’s hand. “Because I need my birthday gift now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1313119401374253056?s=20  
> https://twitter.com/xzhan1005/status/1312947710320930816?s=20


	285. I need you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls show some love to these new fics posted by me!
> 
> \- short yizhan pwp crack-treated-seriously fic: [face mask](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28945878)  
> \- part two of the baoshan sanren/lan yi girl love fic: [are you here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27088465/chapters/71026758#workskin)  
> \- a new wangxian fic set in post cql canon: [now that i am awake](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28946916)
> 
> always appreciate the kudos and comments so keep them coming! they motivate me to write more!

* * *

Xiao Zhan and Yibo felt like they were vibrating out of their skins, the entire car ride to the hotel. Yibo had chosen to ride with Xiao Zhan in his car but that had been a bad idea. Sitting in such close proximity without being able to do anything, made Yibo fidgety. 

Xiao Zhan, sensed Yibo’s impatience, and smirked. He reached out and held Yibo’s hand firmly in his for the rest of the car ride, leaving it only when they arrived at the hotel. 

It was 6 pm. They had two hours before Yibo had to leave. 

Xiao Zhan entered the hotel first, and hurried to his room and waited. A few minutes later, he could hear footsteps outside. Hurried footsteps. He smiled and opened the door before the person could even knock. When Yibo got to the door, he was grabbed by his collar and yanked inside in one fell swoop. 

Xiao Zhan pushed him against the door as he closed it and encaged Yibo with his arms. Yibo eyed the toned muscle of his arms and gulped.

“See something you like?” Xiao Zhan smirked.

Yibo nodded and his lips parted with lust as he planted wet kisses on the bulge of Xiao Zhan’s arms. 

“So, what’s my birthday gift?” Xiao Zhan licked his lips and raked his eyes up and down Yibo. 

With a smirk, Yibo took out an object and placed it in Xiao Zhan’s hand. 

“What’s this?” Xiao Zhan eyed the remote-like object. 

“Press it...slowly,” Yibo grinned.

The moment Xiao Zhan pressed it, Yibo let out a gasp and threw his head back.

“Ahh,” Yibo let out a soft breath and bit his lower lip.

Xiao Zhan froze.

He pressed it again and watched as Yibo squirmed, grinding against the door.

“Do you have a butt plug up your ass right now?” Xiao Zhan asked, incredulous. 

“An electric vibrator whose remote you are holding,” Yibo smiled an impish grin and gazed at Xiao Zhan with lidded eyes.

“Wow,” Xiao Zhan let out in disbelief. “And you’ve been working all day with this in you!?”

“No, just put it in before driving here, ge,” Yibo rolled his eyes.

“Fuck…” Xiao Zhan whispered as he pressed the button again, “That’s hot.”

Yibo nodded as his grin widened.

“Wait here,” Yibo ducked and escaped from Xiao Zhan’s cage and took his phone out. 

He placed the phone on the table and turned it to full volume as he played a song. A sensual voice crooned as a slow, sexy song began to play. Xiao Zhan raised his eyebrows as Yibo began swaying to the music.

As the music rose, Yibo began moving to the sultry rhythm, hips sashaying, body rolling, arms swirling, as he danced to the song. Xiao Zhan felt his mouth run dry. His eyes raked over Yibo’s entire body as he moved to the music. 

Yibo walked towards Xiao Zhan, taking his jacket off in a slow and sensual manner, his eyes never leaving Xiao Zhan. Xiao Zhan gulped as Yibo dropped his jacket to the floor and began unbuttoning his shirt with one hand, starting from the bottom, as his other hand grazed over his abs. 

As the music began to crescendo, Yibo took his shirt off in one swift motion, revealing his abs and bare chest. He came closer to Xiao Zhan and grabbed his hand, running it all over his naked chest, sending tingles down Xiao Zhan’s spine. 

Xiao Zhan watched, mesmerized, as Yibo sank to his knees and licked his lips, as he ran his hand suggestively all over his body before hooking it onto the waistband of his pants. Yibo thrust his hips into the air as he unzipped his pants slowly, locking eyes with Xiao Zhan. 

Xiao Zhan could feel himself drooling as Yibo moved to every beat, as his body captured the music perfectly and moved in sync as if the music was emanating from him. He watched as Yibo went from fully clothed to fully naked in the matter of minutes.

He was so entranced by the striptease that he stared at Yibo in disbelief even as the song ended and another one came on. Yibo smirked at him and led him to the bed by his hand. He pushed Xiao Zhan down to sit at the edge of the bed and began swaying, completely naked, to the next song.

Xiao Zhan watched as the gorgeous, pale, naked body swirled around him, teased him, came close enough to kiss before moving away again, until he could take it no more. 

“Fuck,” Xiao Zhan hissed when Yibo sat on his lap and grinded down against his erection before bending over and swaying his hips.

Which is when Xiao Zhan noticed the vibrator in Yibo. 

He snapped out of his trance and smirked, hand immediately pressing the remote he was holding. Yibo let out a moan and fell forward on all fours, before looking over his shoulder at Xiao Zhan in mock surprise. But Xiao Zhan could see the glint of mischief in his eyes. He wanted more. 

Xiao Zhan stood up and scooped Yibo in his arms and then placed him on the bed lovingly. He kissed Yibo’s lips, his nose, his cheeks, his chin, his neck, making his way down the magnificent body. He licked Yibo’s nipples as he pressed the button down harder making Yibo moan and writhe beneath him.

“Zhan-ge…” Yibo gasped as Xiao Zhan took the vibrator up a level. 

Xiao Zhan kissed his stomach, licked and nibbled on his belly button, sucked a kiss onto his inner thigh, before taking his erection and kissing it. Yibo sighed in relief as Xiao Zhan touched him, taking some of the heat off.

Xiao Zhan couldn't take his eyes off Yibo as he writhed on the bed. He turned the vibrator up to full intensity and watched with hunger as Yibo sweated and panted and moaned his name over and over again. 

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo called out, needing more, needing him. “I need you-”

Xiao Zhan crawled on top of Yibo and muffled his next words with a kiss. He pulled out the vibrator and replaced it with two fingers, immediately brushing against Yibo’s weak spot. 

“I’m gonna wreck you,” Xiao Zhan growled as he flipped Yibo over and latched onto his rim with his mouth. 

Xiao Zhan licked a strip over Yibo’s rim, sending shivers down his spine. He sucked on the opening and tongued it fervently, spreading Yibo’s ass cheeks with both hands, until his face was buried between them. 

Yibo screamed in pleasure as Xiao Zhan ate him thoroughly.

“Gege,” Yibo trembled. “Fuck me…”

Xiao Zhan was more than willing to comply. He sat up behind Yibo and pulled his pants down, immediately guiding his erection into Yibo. Yibo took him easily and Xiao Zhan thrust into him hard.

“Fuck…” Yibo panted as Xiao Zhan kept thrusting into him. “Yes...yes!”

Xiao Zhan grunted and rammed into him mercilessly as Yibo demanded more. Xiao Zhan angled Yibo’s hips up and pound into him at a new angle. Both moaned as their pleasure doubled over and made them weak in their knees.

“You’re so good for me, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan whispered and sweat dripped down his face as he continued thrusting into Yibo. 

“Always, ge,” Yibo managed to mutter, “only for you…”

With one final thrust, both came together with loud groans and an intensity that sent them reeling over the edge. Xiao Zhan fell on the bed beside Yibo and they both panted until they caught their breaths. 

“Fuck…”

“That was…”

Both turned to look at each other and smiled. Xiao Zhan leaned in and kissed Yibo’s nose.

“Perfect.”

* * *

When it was time for Yibo to leave, they held onto each other tight.

“I’m going to have a crazy schedule the next few days,” Xiao Zhan sighed.

“And I have the SDOC finale after this and then I fly to Zhuhai for the race,” Yibo pouted. “Will you be able to come this time?”

Xiao Zhan brushed aside a strand of Yibo’s hair and let out a soft exhale.

“I’ll try my best, gouzaizai,” he spoke sadly, “but I can’t make any promises because of-”

“I know,” Yibo interrupted him with a resigned smile. “Things are just picking up for you and any mistake could have disastrous consequences. I get it. It’s okay, I just-”

Xiao Zhan shut him up with a kiss before hugging him close to his chest again.

“I’ll still try my best.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls show some love to these new fics posted by me!
> 
> \- short yizhan pwp crack-treated-seriously fic: [face mask](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28945878)  
> \- part two of the baoshan sanren/lan yi girl love fic: [are you here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27088465/chapters/71026758#workskin)  
> \- a new wangxian fic set in post cql canon: [now that i am awake](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28946916)
> 
> always appreciate the kudos and comments so keep them coming! they motivate me to write more!


	286. Break this off

* * *

“Zhan-ge! I won!!” Yibo screamed into the phone as he sat in the car on the way to the airport.

“That’s amazing, gouzaizai. Congratulations!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed. “I’m so proud of you.”

“It was so intense, ge…they even made Boubou and Kevin battle each other at one point...that too to my song, Wugan!” 

“Oh no! That just cut your chances of winning by half!”

“I know, right?! But we did it! We won ultimately. I won Street Dance of China, ge!” Yibo beamed proudly. 

“That’s fantastic, Bo-di!” Xiao Zhan cheered along. “I’m so happy for you!”

“Alright, ge...I have to go now, boarding my flight to Zhuhai in some time and I’m really tired.”

“Take care, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan grew worried. “Please take enough rest before you start practicing on the tracks.”

“I will take care, ge,” Yibo smiled, “don't worry. Okay, gotta go now. Love you,” he added with a whisper.

“Love you too,” Xiao Zhan sighed and shook his head.

When Yibo ended the call, he leaned back with a satisfied sigh. His entire body hurt but the victory had been worth it. Now he could focus on the next big thing - his bike race in Zhuhai.

_I will definitely win this year._ Yibo thought to himself passionately. _I can feel it!_

* * *

Three days later, Xiao Zhan had given up on trying to be there for Yibo’s race. He sulked as he satisfied himself with watching the race online at the stream Yibo’s team had provided him. 

“One day,” Xiao Zhan sighed to himself, “one day I’m going to be there and cheer you on in person, gouzaizai,” he pouted in dismay at himself.

Xiao Zhan had managed to clear his schedule for a few hours to watch the race and retired to his room to watch in peace. He settled into the couch with snacks as the event began. 

As the race began, Xiao Zhan did his best to not jump at every turn and corner Yibo took. But each time, he leaned in for a turn and his legs grazed the ground, Xiao Zhan felt his heart drop to his feet. 

Several laps in, Xiao Zhan nearly choked on the chips when someone skid off the tracks and onto the grass and he said his many thanks that it wasn’t Yibo. Thankfully, the biker seemed fine and got back on the bike immediately and rejoined the race.

“These people are crazy!” Xiao Zhan gasped as he settled back down, calming himself. 

Xiao Zhan did his best to keep track of Yibo and his position, which was not too hard to do when he could spot the uniform that he had helped design for him. He tried his best to follow the race and the rankings but mostly stayed clued in whenever the audience began to cheer. And they did so one time for Yibo when he raced ahead of some bikers.

_Careful, gouzaizai._ Xiao Zhan thought to himself as he stilled on seeing Yibo speed up even more. 

Xiao Zhan’s heart raced as Yibo zoomed past some more racers and started taking sharper turns. 

_He knows what he is doing. He’s a professional racer._ Xiao Zhan chanted. 

Just as Yibo was taking another turn, Xiao Zhan’s eyes widened when a biker fell off his bike and the bike swiveled and crashed straight into Yibo.

“Yibo!!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed and stood up as he watched in horror.

* * *

Yibo was disoriented. One moment, he was looking at the track, and the next moment he was looking at the sky. He shook his head and got up quickly, trying to orient himself back in the real world.

He had just fallen off his bike in the middle of the race. 

All thanks to another racer’s mistake. 

“What the fuck!?” Yibo gestured at the man who was scrambling to get onto his bike himself. 

Not wanting to waste any more time either, Yibo rushed to his fallen bike and picked it up. He got on and started to turn it on.

Nothing. 

He tried again and still nothing.

“No, no…no!” Yibo grew frustrated at his failed attempts. “Not this again!”

Eventually, he gave up and got off the bike, letting it fall to the ground once again. He began walking off to the side of the tracks, kicking the dirt along the way, cursing, shouting. 

“What the fuck! Why me!? Why me?!” Yibo groaned as he exited the tracks.

He kicked the sacks kept near by to vent his anger, not caring if he was being followed by cameras. 

_Another chance missed!!_ Yibo thought to himself as crew members and staff came to check on him. 

He shrugged them off and walked back to the pit. 

Seething with rage and frustration, Yibo made his way to the other biker’s pit. As the race ended, the team was celebrating something. Yibo couldn’t resist wanting to straighten things out with him. 

“Hey man, you okay?” The other racer spoke to Yibo when he saw him approaching. 

“Yeah...you?” Yibo asked, reigning in his anger.

“I’m okay, man...sorry about that!” The man sipped his monster energy drink casually as he apologized like it was no big deal. 

“That was a pretty stupid move,” Yibo grit his teeth and replied.

“Yeah but it’s not like it was on purpose,” the man smirked. 

Something in Yibo froze.

“What did you say?” Yibo came closer to the man menacingly.

“Calm down idol-boy,” the man snickered. “This is no place for drama!”

Yibo took a step closer but was held back by a staff member. 

“Alright, boys,” the staff member spoke up finally, “break this off...there are people watching.”

Yibo gulped his emotions and scanned his surroundings. There were too many people and cameras around and he, unlike the other now smug looking racer, had a very public image to maintain. 

Yibo turned away with a huff and began walking back to his team. On the way he was met by Yin Zheng, who had had his race earlier too. 

“Are you okay, otouto?” Yin Zheng eyed him with concern. “What was that all about?”

“He did it on purpose, ge!” Yibo exclaimed once they were inside the pit lounge. “He called me idol-boy! They don't respect me as a racer! They don’t think I belong here!”

“You may be right,” Yin Zheng patted his shoulder. 

“What do you mean?” Yibo asked, distraught. 

“There’s a video circulating of his team celebrating when he took you down on the track.”

Yin Zheng showed Yibo the video of the other team celebrating and cheering after his fall. 

“Those fuckers!!!??” Yibo cursed in rage.

Just then, his bodyguard came up to him with his phone. 

“It’s Xiao Zhan,” his bodyguard, Yanyan, informed him.

“I don't want to talk to him right now,” Yibo shook his head. “Tell him I’m okay and I’ll call him back in some.”

“It’s his fifth call, Yibo,” Yanyan replies instead and Yibo could almost hear the scolding in his voice. 

With a sigh he took the phone and a deep breath.

“Hello, ge?” Yibo began.

“Are you okay, zaizai?” Xiao Zhan’s concerned warm voice floated through the phone.

Yibo felt a lump in his throat and he moved away from the rest of the people to the storage closet.

“No, ge...I’m not okay…” Yibo replied and broke down into sobs.

“Are you hurt?!” Xiao Zhan’s panicked voice asked.

“No, I’m fine...physically.”

“Oh, my sweet boy,” Xiao Zhan exclaimed in sympathy. “I’m so sorry this happened.”

“They did it on purpose, ge...we have proof…” Yibo sobbed. “They think I’m just a celebrity and don’t belong here.”

“Well, they are wrong and they will be punished,” Xiao Zhan’s voice and gentle confidence soothed Yibo’s frazzled nerves. 

“I’m so angry, ge!” Yibo screamed into the empty closet and slammed the wall with his hand. 

“Let it all out,” Xiao Zhan spoke calmly, “I’m right here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yibo's full race including the fall at 36:32  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ii9g_kiwnzQ&ab_channel=TRACKER85
> 
> yibo kissing his necklace:  
> https://twitter.com/Ventus1821/status/1313713309749657600?s=20
> 
> the other team celebrating when yibo fell:  
> https://twitter.com/sperlazy85/status/1313772404523642880?s=20


	287. One day soon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a reminder, that the [google form](https://forms.gle/YTUskUEiqt6ciEV79) will close in two days. Do fill it out if you are interested in doing a group video call with me to celebrate one year of this story!!!

* * *

When XZ ended the call, Yibo’s sobs had stopped. He was ready once again to face the world and carry on with the rest of his work schedule which included flying to Changsha for TTXS. On Xiao Zhan’s insistence, Yibo promised to book an earlier flight so he could get himself checked by a doctor in Changsha.

On Xiao Zhan’s insistence as well, Yibo booked his next flight from Changsha to Shanghai through Beijing. Xiao Zhan would fly to Beijing for a few hours even if it meant just seeing each other at the airport VIP lounge.

“You don’t have to do this, ge...I’ll be fine,” Yibo had said comfortingly, all his anger dissipated on receiving the love and warmth from his fiance.

“I need to see you for myself,” Xiao Zhan had replied stubbornly. “I would come there now if I could.”

“But you’ll only be flying to Beijing airport for a few hours and then back to your shoot,” Yibo had chuckled at the silliness of the plan.

“It’ll be worth it,” Xiao Zhan had spoken in a low voice that told Yibo there was no room for argument. 

After handing Yanyan his phone back, Yibo thanked him for making him answer the call. He did feel better.

So what if the other racer had shown poor sportsmanship? He would be a true sportsman and move forward without regrets. He would work harder and come back stronger next time. He would win. One day. 

On his team’s suggestion, he updated Weibo and even let his fans know he was okay and to not attack the other racer. Xiao Zhan would handle his parents. He knew they must have been watching the race even though they say they won’t. 

In the meantime, Yibo had to handle the press before leaving for the airport. He would face them with his head held high. He had nothing to be ashamed of. 

* * *

Xiao Zhan got off the phone and sighed. He dialled Yibo’s mother and updated her on the situation and told her not to worry. He would make sure Yibo video called her from Han-ge’s in Changsha. When he was done, he leaned back on the couch and groaned in frustration, slamming his fist on the armrest of the couch.

“Stupid fucking moron!” Xiao Zhan cursed the racer that had hit Yibo. “If I ever see him, I’m gonna break his legs!!!” 

As the scene of Yibo falling replayed in his head over and over again, Xiao Zhan shuddered as he thought of how much worse it could have been. Finally, he let his own tears slide out and palmed at his eyes with his hand, rubbing them away. 

_Why does my to-be-husband have to have such dangerous hobbies?!_ Xiao Zhan huffed in exasperation. _But he’s alright. Everything is okay._ He reminded himself. 

With another sigh, Xiao Zhan curled up on the couch and browsed Weibo. He realized that their cp topic was exploding with new behind the scenes footage from the Untamed shoot. Curious, he clicked on one of the videos and smiled when he saw Yibo and him bantering as usual in the video. 

He spent the rest of the night reminiscing, sending Yibo the videos, and seeking solace in the old memories that had been documented for eternity. 

* * *

A few days later, Xiao Zhan boarded his flight to Beijing in anticipation. As soon as he landed at the airport, he rushed to the VIP lounge, hoping and praying that no one else would be around. When he entered the lounge, his eyes hurriedly sought Yibo and he breathed out a sigh of relief on seeing a smiling and healthy Yibo in front of him. 

Scanning the lounge quickly to ensure there were no other guests, Xiao Zhan strode forward and in a few quick strides had reached Yibo and pulled him into a hug. Although taken aback, Yibo smiled knowingly and patted Xiao Zhan’s back.

“I’m okay, baobao,” he whispered.

“I know,” Xiao Zhan whispered back and held him closer, hugging him tightly. “And I’m so thankful for that.”

Finally, Xiao Zhan felt the knot that had been in his chest the last few days, release. He let go of Yibo but not before a quick inspection of his bruises much to Yibo’s amusement.

As they sat together in the lounge, cherishing the two hours they had together before Yibo’s flight to Shanghai, Xiao Zhan showed him more of their old videos as they reminisced and laughed and bantered.

Finally, when it was time for Yibo to catch his flight, Xiao Zhan grunted and spoke.

“You know...there’s a flight to Taiwan in 30 minutes,” Xiao Zhan grinned and wiggled his eyebrows.

Yibo stilled and let out a sad sigh. He placed a hand on Xiao Zhan’s cheek and whispered. 

“We will make it happen,” Yibo reassured Xiao Zhan.

“We were supposed to make it happen on our second anniversary which is in a few days,” Xiao Zhan rested his forehead against Yibo’s and whispered back. “Instead, we won't even be together for it.”

“I’m sorry,” Yibo apologized prompting Xiao Zhan to laugh and shake his head.

“No, no...it’s not just you...it’s both our schedules.”

“Hey,” Yibo held Xiao Zhan in place. “We _will_ make it happen.”

“Okay,” Xiao Zhan smiled a crescent smile and nodded. “We will.”

“One day, ge, one day soon!” Yibo said as he grabbed his bag from the chair.

“One day soon,” Xiao Zhan repeated and laughed.

They hugged and Xiao Zhan planted a kiss on Yibo’s forehead before he left. Xiao Zhan watched as Yibo left and sat back down to wait for his flight. 

_One day soon._ Xiao Zhan pined wistfully as he watched Yibo disappear behind the door. _Isn’t soon enough._

When Xiao Zhan boarded his flight back to Nanjing, he couldn’t help but think wistfully about all the promises they couldn’t see through because of their careers and celebrity lifestyle. He forced himself to focus on the positive.

 _It’s almost been two years of togetherness for us._ Xiao Zhan smiled. _We live together in a place we both call home. We have promised ourselves to each other for the rest of our lives. What more could a guy ask for?!_

His ruminations were interrupted by a text message. 

> __
> 
> __
> 
> Bo-di: I love you, Zhan-ge.
> 
> __

Xiao Zhan smiled to himself and caressed the words on his screen. 

“Nothing...there’s nothing more I could ask for.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://twitter.com/bjyxlove/status/1316457239297826817?s=20


	288. That's what I want

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To the readers who signed up in the google form! 
> 
> Just a reminder that I've sent out emails to the email addresses you provided in the google form for the ytty group video chat! Please check those emails and follow the instructions for the next steps by Feb 2nd! I'm so excited to see y'all!

* * *

Several weeks later, Xiao Zhan was flying back to Beijing for a few days and Yibo was trying to make it back for a few days as well. It was how things had always been and how things might always be, for the time being at least. They would find pockets of time in their busy schedules until they were free again after the end of a project. By which time, it would be time to begin another project and the back and forth would start all over again. 

But they had made it work and that’s what mattered. 

Except when it didn’t work. 

Like now. 

“I just got home, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan spoke into the phone. “What about you?”

“Still stuck at the airport,” came Yibo’s discouraged reply. “Flights are getting delayed because of weather and I’m still trying to get on an earlier flight.”

“Oh,” Xiao Zhan deflated as he put his bag down in the hallway and leaned against the wall, “it’s okay...something will work out…”

“Yeah, I’ll keep you posted, baobao,” Yibo sighed.

“It’s okay...I’m here for three days...we will get some time together no matter when you make it here…” Xiao Zhan managed a small smile.

“I don’t want to miss a single moment with you,” and Xiao Zhan could hear the pout in Yibo’s voice.

“Okay, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan chuckled and shook his head, “I’ll be waiting here...come soon. Love you.”

“Love you too,” Yibo whispered and then ended the call. 

With another sigh, Xiao Zhan took his bag to the bedroom and decided to go for a shower. 

“Please let him come home soon,” Xiao Zhan whispered into the void as he entered the bathroom. “Please let us get these three days together.”

* * *

Yibo grunted at his manager when she came back to him after a seemingly long chat with the airport staff. 

“So?” Yibo asked, trying to keep the impatience out of his voice. 

“So,” she pursed her lips and pouted causing Yibo to deflate a little, “it looks like they can,” here she paused before a faint upturn of her lips, “put you on an earlier flight...one that leaves in twenty minutes. So you’ll be home in three hours,” she chuckled on seeing Yibo’s face brighten up tenfold and his eyes widen in surprise and appreciation.

“Yes!!!” Yibo pumped his fist in the air and jumped up. “Thanks, jie!”

“It’s okay...now tell your Zhan-ge quickly, I’ll go make the arrangements,” the manager laughed and shook her head fondly. 

Yibo hurriedly dialled Xiao Zhan’s number but he didn't answer. 

_Must be taking a shower._ Yibo thought.

He opened WeChat and started typing frantically as his happiness knew no bounds.

> _Yibo: ZHAN-GE!  
>    
>  Yibo: I GOT AN EARLIER FLIGHT  
>    
>  Yibo: See you in three hours, ge! _

Yibo stuffed his pocket and grabbed his bags, as he was led to board his flight, his excitement boundless.

* * *

Xiao Zhan yawned and stretched after getting dressed and picked up his phone. His heart soared when he saw Yibo’s message and he jumped in excitement.

“Yes!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed. “Yes! Yes!”

All would be alright in the end. 

He looked at the time and realized he had taken a really long shower and that there were only two hours left for Yibo to arrive.

Excited, Xiao Zhan had a sudden thought.

_Maybe this time, I can surprise him._ Xiao Zhan bit his lower lip and grinned at the thought.

“First some tea,” Xiao Zhan spoke to himself, “and then I’ll take care of _that,_ ” he chuckled. 

* * *

Yibo rushed out of the car as soon as it stopped outside his home. He leapt out, calling out a hurried goodbye to his bodyguard and driver as he rushed to the house. 

He raced to the door and unlocked it quickly, impatience oozing from every move of his. 

“Zhan-ge!” Yibo called out once he was inside.

There was no response.

With raised eyebrows, Yibo dashed towards their room. On the way, he halted when he saw a whole feast prepared and laid out on the dining table. 

“Wow,” Yibo gasped. “Zhan-ge cooked all this!?”

“Yes, Zhan-ge did!” A familiar voice replied.

“Zhan-ge!!” Yibo literally screamed and rushed forward into the open arms waiting for him. 

“Zaizai,” Xiao Zhan laughed and gathered Yibo in his arms warmly.

“I missed you,” Yibo jumped onto Xiao Zhan, wrapping his legs around his waist, and hugging him hard. 

“I missed you too, sweetie,” Xiao Zhan held Yibo up and inhaled his scent after being apart for so long. 

Xiao Zhan carried Yibo to the couch and sat down with him on his lap. 

“Yibo?” Xiao Zhan nudged him with his shoulder when Yibo didn't say anything more or move at all.

“I don’t know why, ge...I just missed you way more than usual this time,” Yibo clung to Xiao Zhan and Xiao Zhan thought he heard a whimper in his voice.

“Are you crying?!” Xiao Zhan pulled away and looked at Yibo in shock.

“No!” Yibo wiped his eyes and shook his head adamantly. 

“Aye, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan cooed and coaxed Yibo until he looked at him again. “I missed you too...so much...that’s why I took this chance to be here in Beijing with you even if just for a few days before shooting resumes!”

“I know,” Yibo nodded and sighed. “I don't know why I’m feeling so emotional today!”

“I love you, sweetie,” Xiao Zhan laughed goodnaturedly and kissed Yibo on his pouting cheeks and lips.

Before Xiao Zhan could pull away, however, Yibo latched onto his lips gently and didn't let go. Xiao Zhan smiled into the kiss and wrapped his arms around Yibo. They kissed after several weeks apart. They kissed as if they had never kissed before. They kissed until they were breathless and needed to part for air. 

“You’re still cold from outside,” Xiao Zhan kissed Yibo’s nose.

“Yeah, the weather was really bad,” Yibo shrugged.

Xiao Zhan glanced outside the window and his eyes lit up.

“Look, didi,” Xiao Zhan gasped and pointed outside.

Yibo followed Xiao Zhan’s hand and looked outside the window as well. Through the rectangular frame, they saw snow falling outside - slow, gentle, wistful snow falling in the mellow breeze.

“It’s snowing!” Yibo exclaimed, still in Xiao Zhan’s lap.

“It’s the season’s first snow,” Xiao Zhan whispered softly and hugged Yibo close as he leaned back against the couch.

Yibo followed Xiao Zhan and lay against his chest as they gazed outside the window. 

“Remember last year, ge?” Yibo whispered, not wanting to break the moment. “The video you took of yourself in the first snow?”

“Hmm,” Xiao Zhan stroked Yibo’s back and nodded gently.

“This year we got to be together during the first snow...something so romantic about it, right?” Yibo kissed Xiao Zhan’s chest and smiled. 

“You really are extra sappy today!” Xiao Zhan teased and kissed Yibo’s forehead, wrapping his arms around him tighter. “But yes,” he went on in a soft tone, “there’s something really romantic about being together watching the snowfall outside, while we’re snug and cozy and warm inside.”

“You know what’s missing, ge?”

“Hmm?”

“Hot chocolate,” Yibo smirked mischievously. 

“Aya, you brat!” Xiao Zhan grunted and poked Yibo’s side, prompting him to laugh. “Okay, I’ll make some if you let me go!”

“No!” Yibo pouted. “Take me with you!” He batted his eyelashes innocently. 

“Aya, fine! I’m only doing this because you’re being a sappy baby today,” Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes before wrapping Yibo’s legs around him firmly and picking him up once again. 

Yibo flashed him a triumphant grin and tucked his face in the crook of Xiao Zhan’s neck as he was carried like a giant baby. 

Once in the kitchen, Xiao Zhan placed him carefully on the counter and prepared some hot chocolate. Yibo watched as the perfect man moved about their kitchen in their home and made them hot chocolate. He watched and wondered how this was his life. 

“Here you go,” Xiao Zhan stood between Yibo’s legs and handed him one of the two mugs he was holding.

Yibo snapped out of his dazed reverie and grabbed it.

“Thanks, baobao,” Yibo murmured and placed his other hand around Xiao Zhan’s chest as he turned around and leaned his back against Yibo’s chest.

They stared at the snow outside from the big kitchen window and sipped the hot chocolate in silence. Occasionally, Xiao Zhan would receive a kiss on the cheek from Yibo’s now warm lips that would make him smile. 

“This is perfect,” Yibo whispered. “This is exactly what I needed.”

“Everything okay, sweetie?” Xiao Zhan turned around in his arms and asked.

“I just feel like,” Yibo sighed and put his mug down, “like…”

“Like what?” Xiao Zhan put his mug down as well and faced Yibo.

“Like we’ve put so much aside for our career...sometimes I wonder if it’s worth it,” Yibo spoke quietly, as if speaking to himself more than Xiao Zhan.

“It’s always worth it,” Xiao Zhan brushed a strand of Yibo’s hair and caressed his cheek. “Why? Do you think we’re not worth it anymore?” He added worriedly. 

“That’s not what I mean, baobao,” Yibo cupped Xiao Zhan’s cheeks. “I mean...maybe we should start planning our careers around our personal lives…”

“But Yibo...we’re just getting started...and I just had a very bad year…I can’t just-”

“I know I know...maybe I mean...I can...I can be more mindful of the projects I pick…”

“You would be willing to do that for us? You don't have to, you know...I am satisfied with where we are…”

“But I’m not. And starting next year, I want to be more flexible so I have enough time to spend with you...I’m booked for Louyang till early next year but after that I can be picky about the projects I take...and god knows I need to take some rest...” Yibo huffed a laugh.

“Okay...but only if this is what you really want,” Xiao Zhan looked at Yibo with a mix of affection and concern.

“I do...I want more of us, ge...I don’t want to wait months before seeing my fiance each time...and I don’t want to just keep talking about getting married…”

“We will, sweetie,” Xiao Zhan placed a hand on Yibo’s chest and smiled.

“I know...I just...you did a good job of balancing your personal life and career after last year’s craziness with your busy schedule. And even though you got hit by the scandal, you’re back to work now. I just don't want things to go back to how they were now that the scandal is mostly behind you.”

“It won’t. I promised you, didn't I? I’ll be better about my schedule.”

“And I’m saying I’ll be better with mine as well...so that we both have time and flexibility to see each other...hell, we haven't even been on a vacation since 2018!”

Xiao Zhan smiled sadly and turned around in Yibo’s arms again. He leaned back against his chest and let out a slow exhale.

“Enough talking,” Xiao Zhan pouted. “We will work harder to make this relationship work better. And we will begin that by enjoying a romantic evening together, eating a delicious meal I prepared for us, and watching the first snow in Beijing.”

“Okay, baobao,” Yibo laughed softly and kissed Xiao Zhan’s temple.

“And then,” Xiao Zhan turned his head to face Yibo and whispered in his ears, "you’re gonna fuck me."

Yibo gulped and turned to meet Xiao Zhan’s knowing gaze.

“Mhmm,” Xiao Zhan nodded and continued in a whisper. “I’ve even prepped myself for you.”

“Fuck…” Yibo gulped again and licked his lips.

“Yes, baby...that’s what I want,” Xiao Zhan smirked. “So do you want to do me before dinner or after?” He raised an eyebrow and grinned. 

“Now-now,” Yibo stuttered and managed to reply. “Fuck, Zhan-ge...now…”


	289. Are you comfortable?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT NOTE: Final reminder for the readers who were interested in the group video chat -
> 
> Please check the email you shared with me and follow the instructions by tomorrow! Thanks! Eeeep! I'm so excited to see you all soon. If anyone missed the google form and is still interested in joining us, please comment here or dm me at jalpari_yizhan on twitter.

* * *

“So impatient,” Xiao Zhan pushed away from Yibo, just out of his reach.

“You know me,” Yibo jumped off the counter and walked after Xiao Zhan, “I always want dessert first.”

“Tch tch,” Xiao Zhan clucked his tongue and smiled seductively. “Today’s youth is so spoiled!”

Xiao Zhan raked a part of his t-shirt up, revealing his thin waist and the moles on it. Yibo felt his mouth water as his eyes tracked the naked skin being slowly revealed.

“Zhan-ge,” Yibo licked his lips and swallowed hard.”

“See something you like, Bo-ge,” Xiao Zhan asked innocently.

Yibo’s dick grew more erect at those words and he let out a shuddered gasp as Xiao Zhan pulled his t-shirt off and threw it aside while turning around and walking away.

Yibo trailed after Xiao Zhan like a hungry puppy and they made their way to the bedroom. Along the way, Xiao Zhan played with his shorts, tugging at them just enough to reveal a glint of something lacey underneath. 

“Zhan-ge...what are you wearing?” Yibo nearly croaked out as soon as his eyes caught a glimpse of the lace fabric lining Xiao Zhan’s hips. 

“Why don’t you come and find out, Bo-ge?” Xiao Zhan looked over his shoulder and smiled with a side smirk.

There was enough of a challenge in his voice to rile Yibo up. In a few quick strides, he caught up with Xiao Zhan and pinned him against the corridor wall. Xiao Zhan let out a breathy laugh as Yibo’s eyes traced down his naked torso.

“You’re fucking beautiful,” Yibo murmured as he leaned in and nibbled on Xiao Zhan’s lower lip.

“How beautiful?” Xiao Zhan blushed but maintained eye contact with Yibo.

“So beautiful I’m gonna wreck you ten times over,” Yibo whispered and bit down on Xiao Zhan’s chin before licking his way down his neck.

“Ahh,” Xiao Zhan gasped and fell back against the wall.

Yibo kissed and sucked his way down Xiao Zhan’s naked chest, giving special attention to his nipples. He licked circles around them before nibbling and sucking on them until they were perky and hard. 

“Bo-ge…” Xiao Zhan moaned as Yibo continued to lick and kiss his way down, hand latching onto the waistband of his shorts.

Yibo pulled down the shorts, dropping them to the ground, and took in a sharp inhale when he saw the sight that lay in front of him. 

Xiao Zhan was wearing a black and red lace g-string, with an attached garter, that could barely contain his erection. Yibo gasped as he reached out to touch the soft fabric that was barely concealing Xiao Zhan’s length. 

“Fuck…” Yibo hissed as he made contact with the lace and ran his fingers over the erection where there was a wet spot on the fabric.

“Like it?” Xiao Zhan asked, suddenly nervous.

“Like it?” Yibo took a step back and took in all of Xiao Zhan from top to bottom, completely naked except for the lingerie. “I fucking love it.”

“What about now?” Xiao Zhan suddenly smirked and turned around to reveal the open butt design of the g-string, which perfectly framed his ass, making it look enticing and inviting.

“Fuck.”

Xiao Zhan looked over his shoulder just in time to see Yibo run his hand over his mouth and staring at his ass in utter disbelief.

“You look...that...fuck...I wanna fuck you so bad, ge,” Yibo managed to mutter some sensible words in between his gasps.

“What are you waiting for?” Xiao Zhan giggled and perked his ass out, swaying it from side to side slowly, seductively.

He leaned forward, pushing his ass out further in the direction of Yibo, and waited.

“Get in the bedroom,” Yibo grit his teeth and ordered Xiao Zhan, “now.”

Xiao Zhan pushed away from the wall and strutted towards the bedroom with Yibo trailing behind, unable to peel his eyes away from Xiao Zhan’s exposed ass. 

As soon as they were inside, Yibo pushed Xiao Zhan down on the bed and climbed on top of him impatiently.

“Fuck…ge…this is perfect…you are perfect,” Yibo growled as he mouthed at Xiao Zhan’s lips with his teeth before moving down to suck a hickey onto his neck. 

Xiao Zhan fell back onto the bed, with Yibo on top, and moaned as Yibo kissed him everywhere, licking his way down his body. 

Yibo grabbed the lube from the nightstand and flipped Xiao Zhan over and smacked his ass with a loud slap.

“Bo-ge!” Xiao Zhan whined in fake protest but Yibo knew Xiao Zhan wanted more. 

He smacked his ass again, this time the other cheek, before lavishing them with kisses. He spread the cheeks with his hand and kissed Xiao Zhan’s opening, tonguing at the rim. He slid in two fingers easily enough and scissored him open again.

“Yes...Bo-ge…” Xiao Zhan moaned into the bed as Yibo massaged his spot. “I need more, Yibo...I need you…just fuck me already!”

Yibo smirked and coated his own erection with some lube before grabbing onto Xiao Zhan’s hips and pulling him up on all fours. He lined himself up and slowly slid himself inside until he had bottomed out. 

Xiao Zhan groaned with pleasure, his body on fire from the stretch and the burn, loving every minute of it. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful, baobao,” Yibo grunted as he began moving, “this ass is so fucking perfect...and just for me…” 

“Only for you,” Xiao Zhan mewled as Yibo rammed into him, finding his special spot.

They moved together in a steady growing rhythm as Yibo pounded into Xiao Zhan. The sheer sight of Xiao Zhan’s ass in the lace was driving Yibo wilder with every passing second. 

Xiao Zhan’s moans grew louder as Yibo thrust into him again and again, sparing him no mercy. He thrust into him, harder, deeper, and faster each time, both their bodies craving more. 

When Xiao Zhan finally came untouched, Yibo fucked him through his orgasm, chasing his own high. Xiao Zhan came furiously as Yibo wrung him dry and then came inside him as well. They fell forward on the bed as Yibo came endlessly inside Xiao Zhan. 

“Fuck…” Yibo huffed and rolled off Xiao Zhan to one side.

“It’s been so long since we did this,” Xiao Zhan sighed as he raised himself up on his elbows and looked at Yibo.

“Yeah...fuck…” Yibo muttered, prompting Xiao Zhan to chuckle and shake his head. 

“I love you,” Xiao Zhan shuffled closer to Yibo and cuddled against him. “So, did you like my surprise?”

“You’re the fucking best,” Yibo wrapped his arms around Xiao Zhan and kissed his sweaty forehead. “I love you so much.”

“Next time, we’re buying something like this for you too,” Xiao Zhan giggled and kissed Yibo’s cheek.

“Done...anything for you, baobao,” Yibo smirked and nodded.

“I’m super hungry now,” Xiao Zhan sighed and sat up. “Wanna eat or shower first?”

“How about we eat first? I’m famished.”

“Did you not have anything for lunch again except your diet pills!?” Xiao Zhan looked at Yibo with a frown.

“Nothing like that,” Yibo sat up as well and smiled at Xiao Zhan sweetly. “I just didn’t feel hungry at the airport with all the back and forth over the flights.”

“Look at you,” Xiao Zhan poked Yibo’s ribs, “you’re getting bonier every day, Yibo!”

“Are you saying I don’t look good, ge?!” Yibo looked at Xiao Zhan, hurt. 

“No, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan cupped Yibo’s cheeks and smiled. “I will always find you attractive...no matter what shape or size you are...but you need to take better care of yourself.”

“Hmm,” Yibo nodded with a slight pout, “okay.”

“Come on, let’s get some of my tasty food in you,” Xiao Zhan stood up and pulled Yibo along with him. 

* * *

After dinner, Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo sat by their bedroom window, wrapped up in a big soft, warm blanket and watched the snowfall outside. Yibo, who was sitting between Xiao Zhan’s legs, leaned cozily against Xiao Zhan’s chest and snuggled as they sat together.

“Are you comfortable?” Xiao Zhan wrapped his arms around Yibo and pulled him closer.

“Very,” Yibo looked up at him and beamed, “and if the next three days are gonna be anything like today, this is gonna be the best break,” he smiled and kissed Xiao Zhan’s chin. 

“We’re gonna relax, eat, talk, and fuck,” Xiao Zhan giggled as Yibo cuddled closer.

“That’s the plan, Zhan-ge,” Yibo sighed and melted in his arms, “that sounds perfect.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what i imagine xz to be wearing, caution NSFW in the links below -
> 
> https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/u7AAAOSwx09ezeZz/s-l300.jpg
> 
> https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/1132/2808/products/Male-Power_176-178_Black_B_1.progressive.jpg?v=1588176671


	290. The person at the door

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a big thank you to everyone who joined the video chat! it was so much fun seeing y'all. thank you thank you thank you! here's to many more chapters and a never-ending ytty!

* * *

When Xiao Zhan woke up in the morning, Yibo was still sleeping, and still cuddling against him. His arms and legs were flung over Xiao Zhan, trapping him beneath Yibo. Xiao Zhan smiled and sighed, enjoying the weight of Yibo over him like a comforting blanket. 

_This is perfect._ Xiao Zhan thought. _I wish we could stay like this forever._

Just then, Yibo’s phone rang. Xiao Zhan winced at the sudden noise and hurriedly muted it. It was from his manager.

“Wei,” Xiao Zhan answered softly, careful not to wake Yibo up. “It’s me...sorry, Yibo is sleeping right now...anything urgent?”

“Yes,” came the manager’s reply, “unfortunately, something came up and he will have to work for a few hours today despite promising him these three days off,” she sighed. 

“Oh,” Xiao Zhan sat up and frowned. “Okay, I’ll wake him up and ask him to call you.”

“Thank you, Xiao Zhan,” the manager replied in relief and hung up.

Xiao Zhan kept the phone aside and nudged Yibo slowly.

“Bo-di,” he whispered softly, kissing Yibo’s temple. “Wake up…”

Yibo didn’t budge.

“Yibo, wake up,” Xiao Zhan spoke a little louder and nudged Yibo harder.

“Mmm,” Yibo hummed and shifted in his sleep and his hands found Xiao Zhan and grabbed him closer.

“Ayaa,” Xiao Zhan let out a soft laugh as he was manhandled into a cuddle by Yibo. “Wake up, your manager needs to talk to you urgently.”

“I’m on vacation for three days,” Yibo frowned, his eyes still closed.

“It’s urgent, gouzaizai,” Xiao Zhan cradled Yibo and kissed his forehead. “You need to call her back immediately.”

“Later,” Yibo grunted and buried his face in Xiao Zhan’s chest.

“You’re needed for work,” Xiao Zhan ran his hand through Yibo’s hair and sighed. “Come on, Bo-di...wake up.”

“Mmm,” Yibo melted under Xiao Zhan’s touch. “Okay, fine,” he exhaled and finally opened his eyes.

“Hey,” Xiao Zhan smiled as Yibo looked at him with a pouty smile.

“Hey,” Yibo smiled back.

“Good morning,” Xiao Zhan leaned in for a kiss.

“Mmm...morning,” Yibo sighed as Xiao Zhan deepened the kiss. 

They wrapped themselves around each other as they kissed, hands roaming their entire body freely. Soon, they were a panting mess as the kiss turned heated and Xiao Zhan climbed on top of Yibo, grinding against him.

“Zhan-ge,” Yibo panted breathlessly as Xiao Zhan kept grinding down on him.

“Want me to stop?” Xiao Zhan smirked and pulled away for a brief second.

“No!” Yibo exclaimed and pulled Xiao Zhan back towards him.

With a chuckle, Xiao Zhan resumed kissing his way down Yibo’s neck. Yibo angled his neck, giving Xiao Zhan better access. 

Just then the phone rang again, this time it was Xiao Zhan’s phone. 

“It’s an unknown number, don’t answer it, ge,” Yibo grunted in frustration as Xiao Zhan pulled away yet again to look at his phone, sitting up on Yibo.

Xiao Zhan nodded and put his phone aside but by then Yibo had sat up as well so that Xiao Zhan was straddling his lap.

“Baobao,” Yibo whined, nipping at Xiao Zhan’s chin.

“Hmm?” Xiao Zhan laughed as he stared at the number that he had just missed the call from.

“How about a quickie?” Yibo whined some more, trying to get Xiao Zhan’s attention by kissing his neck.

“Yibo you need to call your manager first,” Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow as he kept staring at the phone.

“What is it, ge?” Yibo paused his whining and asked.

“Nothing,” Xiao Zhan exhaled and put the phone aside finally. “I just thought I recognized the number for some reason. But I can’t remember for sure.”

“Okay,” Yibo took the phone out of Xiao Zhan’s hand and put it aside. “How about,” Yibo slid his hand into Xiao Zhan’s pants and smirked, “a quick handjob?”

“Mmm,” Xiao Zhan moaned as Yibo began stroking his dick and bringing it to full hardness. 

Yibo made quick work of both their erections with his hand, rubbing them together, stroking them furiously with both hands. Xiao Zhan panted into Yibo’s mouth, resting his forehead against his, as Yibo worked their lengths.

Soon, he had them coming into his hands with a groan and Xiao Zhan’s body shivered and shuddered as he came in spurts.

“Fuck,” Xiao Zhan groaned when he was spent.

Yibo smirked and enveloped Xiao Zhan’s lips in his, kissing him sloppily as he cleaned his hands with a tissue.

“Now this is a good morning,” Yibo grinned naughtily and Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes with a chuckle. 

After cleaning them up, Yibo kissed Xiao Zhan’s cheeks and nose and smiled happily. Xiao Zhan handed him his phone and gestured for him to call his manager. With a sulky exhale, Yibo dialled his manager and waited.

Xiao Zhan listened as Yibo noted the details of his sudden work commitment.

“Sorry, ge,” Yibo sighed as he ended the call. “I have to work for a few hours.”

“It’s okay,” Xiao Zhan smiled and crawled off Yibo’s lap. “It’s just a few hours...I’ll see you tonight?”

“Hmm,” Yibo nodded and got off the bed to get ready. “I’ll see you tonight.”

* * *

Xiao Zhan walked around the kitchen excitedly as he added the finishing touches to the meal for the night. He had prepared a romantic meal for two to belatedly celebrate their two year anniversary as a surprise for when Yibo returned. 

He had set up candles in the dining room and fairy lights on the balcony porch in preparation for a romantic night with Yibo. Yibo being away for work had turned into a blessing after all so that Xiao Zhan could prepare this surprise. 

Just then, he heard the doorbell ring.

_Why is Yibo not using his keys?!_ Xiao Zhan thought in confusion. _Maybe he forgot his keys._

With those thoughts, Xiao Zhan rushed to the door to welcome Yibo and surprise him.

But when he opened the door, Xiao Zhan was stunned. He froze as he took in the sight of the person at the door.

“Zhan-Zhan!!” The man grinned and exclaimed with a shy wave of his hand.

“K-Kyle?” Xiao Zhan stuttered as he finally snapped out of his shock.

Both men stared at each other, Kyle smiling sheepishly and Xiao Zhan in utter shock.

“Hi,” Kyle bit his lips nervously. 

Before he knew what was happening, Kyle had stepped forward and wrapped Xiao Zhan in an awkward yet warm embrace.

Xiao Zhan wrapped his arms around his old friend as the initial shock wore off and hugged him back. 

“Kyle,” Xiao Zhan muttered, still in disbelief.

“Zhan-Zhan,” Kyle whispered as they stood in each other’s embrace.

“Zhan-ge?” A third voice suddenly spoke up from behind Kyle and Xiao Zhan opened his eyes to see Yibo standing at the doorstep as well. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> new fic alert! if you like angst, this one's for you - [nobody is immune to the pain of being alive.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29184270%22)
> 
> to those who know who kyle is, shhh! all shall be revealed in the next chapter!


	291. If I had known

* * *

“Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan pulled back from the hug and smiled, “this is...uhh...this is Kyle.”

“Hi,” Kyle smiled sheepishly. “Sorry to show up unannounced but I tried calling you this morning and I’m in Beijing only for-” he added hurriedly.

“Oh, that was your number!” Xiao Zhan smacked his forehead. “I guess I didn’t save it after I changed my number the last time it leaked.”

“Oh, yeah,” Kyle chuckled. “Sorry...I got your number and address from aunty and-”

“Aunty?” Yibo finally spoke up again.

“Zhan-Zhan’s mom,” Kyle nodded. “She was so happy that I was going to be visiting Beijing that she insisted I come and visit you,” he grinned shyly. “She even gave me the security code to your main gate-”

“But who are you?” Yibo blurted abruptly and walked to stand beside Xiao Zhan.

“Oh, sorry, I-”

“Stop apologizing so much!” Xiao Zhan huffed and grabbed Kyle by the hand. “Come inside first! I’ll explain everything!”

Yibo watched as Xiao Zhan dragged Kyle inside by the hand and grit his teeth. 

Once they were all inside the living room, Xiao Zhan sat Kyle down and brought out some snacks and drinks. 

“Sorry to barge in like this…” Kyle eyed the decor and feast laid out in the dining room. “Looks like I interrupted something…”

Yibo looked at the feast in surprise and turned to Xiao Zhan who shook his head with an amiable smile.

“No, no...it was just dinner,” Xiao Zhan waved his hand in dismissal. 

“Was it?” Yibo raised his eyebrows.

“Later, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan spoke in a warning tone and then turned his attention back to Kyle. “Let me introduce one of my oldest and bestest friends to you, Yibo,” he smiled brightly. “This is Kyle...we go way back to college in Chongqing together.”

“Oh…” Yibo muttered as he leaned forward to take Kyle’s extended hand into a handshake. “Nice to meet you, Kyle…”

“Nice to meet you too, Wang Yibo,” Kyle smiled politely.

“And Kyle,” Xiao Zhan paused suddenly before clearing his throat and smiling again, “this is my partner and fiance, Wang Yibo…”

“Oh…” Kyle looked visibly surprised. “I didn’t know you were engaged! Congratulations, Zhan-Zhan! My boyfriend is a huge fan of your cp...he would go crazy if he knew you two were together!”

“Oh, you have a boyfriend?” Xiao Zhan asked, surprised as well.

Kyle smiled and shrugged before answering in a teasing tone.

“Couldn’t wait forever for you to realize you’re bisexual, now could I , Zhan-Zhan?” Kyle laughed.

“Very funny, Kyle!” Xiao Zhan laughed along but Yibo clenched his fist.

As the night progressed, Kyle and Xiao Zhan talked about their childhood days in Chongqing and how they met in school and then in college as well and how they became best friends after that. They even joked about their old weibo handles which were kylelovesdaytoy and daytoykylelove.

Yibo, to say the very least, was not amused. Although he kept up a polite smile throughout.

As they moved to eating dinner, the conversation continued and Kyle and Xiao Zhan shared many of their old tales with Yibo including trips they had taken together and other escapades. Kyle even pulled out old photos of them together at bars, in school, and in a swimming pool while on vacation. 

Yibo couldn’t stop staring at the swimming pool photo in particular where Xiao Zhan was smiling at the camera held by Kyle. He looked at the utter fondness and affection that seemed to radiate in Xiao Zhan’s eyes and smile and felt something heavy prick him in his chest. 

“I...I need to change,” Yibo excused himself after dinner in the middle of the ongoing conversation about the ‘good old times’ in Chongqing.

“Okay,” Xiao Zhan smiled and nodded as Yibo took his leave. 

Yibo walked up to the bedroom and sat at the edge of the bed, feeling suddenly downcast. He didn’t realize how much time had passed until-

“Bo-di?” Xiao Zhan’s voice broke through his stupor. “It’s been a while since you came up here...you okay?”

Yibo looked up to see a smiling Xiao Zhan looking at him.

“I just thought I’d check on you,” Xiao Zhan leaned against the doorway. “You need more time?”

“Ge…” Yibo tried replying, voice shaky.

“What is it, didi?” Xiao Zhan suddenly looked at him in concern. “Are you feeling okay?”

“I...I don't know,” Yibo replied honestly. “I feel weird.”

“Weird how? Is your stomach okay? Are you feeling ill?” Xiao Zhan approached Yibo and placed a hand on his forehead. 

“I...I don’t know,” Yibo stuttered and looked down, suddenly feeling like crying. 

“Yibo? Maybe you should rest,” Xiao Zhan knelt in front of him and suggested. “Okay?”

“And you?” Yibo couldn’t help but ask.

“Do you need me here, sweetie?” Xiao Zhan placed a hand on Yibo’s cheek and asked worriedly. “If so, I can meet Kyle later and-”

“No…” Yibo blurted, suddenly more uncomfortable at the thought of them meeting again later, “you should...umm...go hang out with him now...I’ll just rest.”

“Are you sure?” Xiao Zhan searched his eyes.

“Mhmm,” Yibo nodded and exhaled.

“Okay, call me if you need anything,” Xiao Zhan stood up and patted Yibo’s head.

With those words, Yibo watched Xiao Zhan leave and soon he heard the chattering resume downstairs. Yibo changed into his pyjamas and then suddenly realized that he hadn’t even kissed Xiao Zhan on returning home.

Suddenly, all he wanted was to kiss Xiao Zhan and know that everything was okay. That all his insecurities and fears regarding Kyle were silly and stupid and baseless. That what he was interpreting from their interactions, was just his overactive imagination and nothing more. 

Yibo tossed and turned and finally gave up. He got out of bed, determined to see Xiao Zhan and kiss him good night. As he made his way downstairs, the chattering became clearer and Yibo stopped mid-step as he heard the conversation that was unfolding. 

“What?” Xiao Zhan gasped and seemed to reply in shock. “I...I never knew, Kyle.”

“I’m sorry I brought it up, Zhan-Zhan!” Kyle laughed softly. “It’s such ancient history anyway!”

“I’m...uhh...I’m sorry, Kyle!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed, seemingly flustered. 

“There’s nothing to be sorry about,” Kyle replied gently. “We were kids...we were oblivious!”

_Oblivious to what? What ancient history?_ Yibo’s mind raced ahead and wondered. 

“I don’t know what to say, Kyle,” Xiao Zhan’s voice sounded laden with emotions. “I didn't know you loved me. If I had known...” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so according to some old photos and screenshots that I have been shown, Kyle seems to be a very close friend of XZ from college. Some even speculate, an ex-bf :P


	292. It's all in the past

* * *

“If you had known?” Kyle’s voice seemed lower, almost soft like a whisper. 

There was silence and Yibo felt like he was suffocating.

“I don’t know what I would have done, Kyle…I’m not sure I felt the same way...back then...” Xiao Zhan replied in an apologetic tone. “But I’m glad things worked out for the best for both of us...are you happy with your boyfriend?”

“I am,” Kyle replied and Yibo thought he heard disappointment in his voice. “And you?”

Yibo held his breath.

“I am more happy than I ever thought I could be,” Xiao Zhan replied and Yibo could hear the smile in his voice.

Yibo released the breath he had been holding and felt a sudden urge take over him. He walked down the remaining steps and turned into the living room. 

“Yibo!” Xiao Zhan stood up. “Are you feeling better? I thought you would be slee-”

Before Xiao Zhan could finish his words, Yibo enveloped his lips in his and pressed a soft kiss into them. He hugged a stunned Xiao Zhan and whispered in his ears. 

“I love you, Zhan-ge...and I’m feeling a lot better now.”

Xiao Zhan pulled away from the embrace and took Yibo’s hand in his. 

“Well, I should get going,” Kyle smiled at them and sighed. “It’s getting late and I have an early morning tomorrow.”

“Oh,” Xiao Zhan turned his attention back to Kyle. “Thank you for coming though!” He reached out and pulled Kyle in a warm hug. “Stay in touch!”

“I will,” Kyle smiled warmly and nodded. “And next time, maybe I can bring my boyfriend along.”

“We would love that,” Xiao Zhan held Yibo’s hand and nodded.

After saying their goodbyes, Kyle left and Xiao Zhan turned to Yibo with a knowing look.

“Come here, sweetie,” Xiao Zhan pulled him down on the couch beside him.

Yibo sat down, sidling closer to Xiao Zhan and waited.

“Did you hear what we were talking about?” Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow.

“Yes,” Yibo admitted sheepishly.

“I knew that kiss was there for a reason,” Xiao Zhan chuckled and shook his head fondly. 

“I only heard parts…what were you two talking about?” Yibo asked, suddenly more curious than worried. 

“We were reminiscing about our past and Kyle mentioned how he realized years later that what he felt for me was more than just normal friendship.”

“And you?” Yibo looked at him, vulnerable and nervous. “What did you feel for him?”

Xiao Zhan sighed and shook his head.

“I don’t know, I never thought of him that way….but looking back now...we _were_ very close and maybe we _were_ oblivious to our true feelings back then. Who knows?” Xiao Zhan laughed. “It’s all in the past and full of what-ifs anyway.”

“Why didn’t you tell him that?” Yibo asked.

“Because I don’t know about him, but I am in a very happy, committed relationship and I didn’t want to give him even an inkling of hope,” Xiao Zhan cupped Yibo’s cheeks and replied. “It doesn’t matter what happened in the past.”

“Hmm,” Yibo nodded and gazed at Xiao Zhan thoughtfully. 

“What are you thinking?” 

“About the what-ifs,” Yibo couldn't help but frown.

“Like what?”

“Like if you _had_ realized your feelings for each other back then, we never would have happened,” Yibo pursed his lips and pouted.

“Aya!” Xiao Zhan huffed and rolled his eyes. “How do you know that? Maybe I would have still fallen for you and then had a terrible break up because of you!” He laughed with a twinkle in his eyes. 

“Because we were meant to be?” Yibo asked hopefully.

“Because it’s you…” Xiao Zhan rubbed their noses together and smiled brightly. “And no matter what, I will always choose you.”

“You’re such a sap,” Yibo grinned and pushed Xiao Zhan away.

“Says the guy who was asking me if we were meant to be!” Xiao Zhan poked Yibo’s side.

Soon, they devolved into play fighting and the sound of their giggles filled the night. 

“Ok, mercy, mercy!” Xiao Zhan laughed as Yibo pinned him to the couch. 

“By the way,” Yibo tilted his head and planted a kiss on Xiao Zhan’s neck. “Was that dinner meant to be a feast for us?”

“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan nodded guilty, “I prepared it to celebrate our two year anniversary belatedly…”

“Oh,” Yibo’s face softened and he leaned in closer, “thank you, gege.”

“Which reminds me,” Xiao Zhan frowned suddenly, “I’m going to have to talk to mama about giving our security code away to Kyle!”

“Yeah, we should probably change the code to the main gate,” Yibo chuckled. “Don’t want any more exes of yours showing up!”

“He was not an ex!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed, flustered. 

“I’m very upset, gege,” Yibo pouted. “Take responsibility for my hurt feelings!”

Xiao Zhan smirked and flipped them around on the couch, pinning Yibo to the sofa cushion.

“I’m so proud of how you handled it, _didi_ ,” Xiao Zhan spoke in a sweet tone. “You’ve gotten so much better at controlling your jealousy.”

“So what’s my reward?” Yibo wiggled his eyebrows and grinned impishly. 

“Brat!” Xiao Zhan shook his head but couldn’t keep the fondness out of his voice.

“Your brat,” Yibo gave him a smug smile.

“My brat,” Xiao Zhan’s eyes softened and he smiled at Yibo lovingly. 

They gazed into each other’s eyes, with dopey grins on their faces. Xiao Zhan leaned in and sealed their lips together. 

Yibo sighed into the kiss as Xiao Zhan’s tongue grazed his lips, asking for permission to enter. As they deepened the kiss, their bodies moved together in a slow rhythm against each other. With muffled moans, Yibo ran his hand through Xiao Zhan’s hair as he tasted every inch of him. 

Xiao Zhan kept grinding against Yibo and groaned into the kiss when he felt their erections rub against each other.

“Zhan-ge,” Yibo breathed and moaned as Xiao Zhan sucked a hickey on his neck.

“Fuck, I love you so much,” Xiao Zhan whispered as he watched Yibo’s beautiful face drown in pleasure.

“I love you more,” Yibo looked up at him, eyes half lidded, and smiled breathlessly. 

“Not possible,” Xiao Zhan smiled back. “Not possible at all.”


	293. I don't think I am

* * *

The month of November passed by in a flurry with Xiao Zhan shooting his military drama and Yibo shuttling between several work commitments as well. 

Xiao Zhan was busy with his shooting when he got the call.

“Wei?” Xiao Zhan answered, a little surprised on seeing Lele, Yibo’s bodyguard calling him.

“Xiao Zhan,” Lele spoke hurriedly, “there is no need to worry but I just wanted to let you know that Wang Yibo has been brought to the hospital urgently.”

“What?!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed. “What happened?”

“Stomach issues...and weakness,” Lele sighed. 

“Again?” Xiao Zhan frowned, his voice a little shaky. “Is he conscious? Did he faint?!”

“He is conscious...he was feeling faint but didn't actually faint,” Lele replied quickly.

Xiao Zhan let out a sigh of relief and sat down in one corner of the set, signalling to his assistant that he needed a few minutes more.

“Can I talk to him?”

“The doctor is in with him right now- oh, I think he’s done...hold on let me check.”

Xiao Zhan heard some muffled talking and the next voice he heard was a tired, familiar voice that immediately loosened the ache in his chest.

“Zhan-ge?” Yibo came on the line.

“Bo-di!” Xiao Zhan felt his eyes burn. “Are you okay?”

“I’m sorry Lele bothered you at work, ge...I-”

“Are you kidding me, didi!?” Xiao Zhan snapped. “If something happens to you, I want to know immediately. I don’t care if I’m at work or doing something else important.”

“Don’t be angry, ge...please…” Yibo pleaded softly. 

Xiao Zhan shut his eyes and exhaled slowly, calming himself down.

“Are you okay, sweetie?” He asked when he opened his eyes.

“I’m fine, ge. Seriously. It was just some exhaustion.”

“Yibo…” Xiao Zhan began sternly.

“I know, I know,” Yibo sighed and Xiao Zhan could feel the resignation in his voice. “I need to take better care of myself.”

“This can’t keep happening,” Xiao Zhan spoke gently. “You’re too young to be in and out of the hospital this often…”

“It’s not that often-”

“Yibo, you’ve been on an IV drip thrice this year due to weakness and exhaustion!” Xiao Zhan’s temper flared up. 

“Zhan-ge,” Yibo spoke meekly.

“Sorry,” Xiao Zhan lowered his voice, “I just...I’m just worried, Yibo...you’re taking your health for granted and it’s gonna come back and bite you in your ass one day.”

“The only thing I want biting my ass is you, ge,” Xiao Zhan could hear the smirk in Yibo’s voice. 

Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes and snorted. 

“Aya…” Xiao Zhan sighed and looked up at the sky. “What am I going to do with you?!”

“Sorry to worry you, ge,” Yibo’s tone turned somber again. “But I’m fine…”

“Just take better care of yourself, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan spoke softly. “You work a lot, your diet needs to keep up with your energy needs.”

“I know,” Yibo replied. 

“Promise me.”

“I promise, ge.”

* * *

It was late in the evening when Xiao Zhan got the call from Wang Han.

“Han-ge?” Xiao Zhan answered the call immediately.

“Sorry to disturb you, Zhan-Zhan but I think you should know this,” Wang Han sounded tired and worried.

“What happened, ge?” Xiao Zhan gestured to his assistant that he would need a few minutes and walked to one corner of the set.

“It’s Yibo,” Wang Han sighed. “He’s in the hospital again for stomach issues.”

“Oh,” Xiao Zhan’s throat went dry. 

“He nearly fainted again, he was in that much pain,” Wang Han explained further.

“What did the doctors say?” Xiao Zhan asked, biting his lips and worried to the bone.

“The same old thing,” Wang Han exhaled and Xiao Zhan understood immediately, “that he needs to eat better and take care of his health.”

“Can I talk to him, Han-ge?” Xiao Zhan rubbed his temples.

“Sure, one sec, let me go inside again,” Xiao Zhan heard a door open and shut and some ruffling noise and then a familiar voice spoke heavily. 

“Zhan-ge,” Yibo spoke dully. “I’m sorry-”

“Yibo,” Xiao Zhan interrupted him with a shaky voice, “are you feeling better, sweetie?”

“Hmm,” Yibo replied, clearly tired and done with the day, “the pain is better now but I still feel tired.”

“Come here for a few days,” Xiao Zhan said.

“I can’t, ge, I have-”

“I’ll talk to your manager,” Xiao Zhan grit his teeth. “If you can’t come here, the least you can do is rest for a few days at Han-ge’s in Changsha itself instead of resuming work like nothing happened.”

“I can’t, ge,” Yibo whispered.

“What do you mean you can’t? Don’t you care about your health at all!?” Xiao Zhan erupted suddenly. 

“I do!! And I said I’m fine!” Yibo snapped back but immediately regretted his tone. “I’m tired, ge...I’ll talk to you later-”

“Don’t you even think of hanging up on me,” Xiao Zhan replied, anger suddenly spilling over. 

“I don’t want to fight, ge,” Yibo pleaded with a whisper. 

“Then talk to your manager and take a few days off to recover,” Xiao Zhan clenched his fist and tried to calm his voice. 

“Okay,” Yibo sighed, relenting finally, “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Good,” Xiao Zhan let out the breath he didn’t know he had been holding and sighed. “Good.”

* * *

Yibo had been here before. Several times in fact. The hospital had been his second home as a kid, when he was constantly sick due to his heart troubles. It had sucked but he had moved past it. And now it seemed that Xiao Zhan was right. He seemed to be here too often lately.

With a grunt, he made the call to his manager and forced her to make arrangements so he could get two days off. He had the option of staying at Wang Han’s home and recovering but he really wanted to be with Xiao Zhan. Ignoring everyone’s advice, he booked a flight to Xiao Zhan even though he wouldn’t get more than a day with him after cutting out travel time. 

Whatever, Yibo had thought, it would be worth it. 

Something knotted in his stomach as he made his way to Xiao Zhan’s room. It felt as if a storm was brewing inside him. The uneasiness became worse as he approached Xiao Zhan’s room. 

Just as he knocked on the hotel room door, he felt the pain kick him in the stomach and he bent over, nearly kneeling due to the pain. When Xiao Zhan opened his door, he looked at Yibo in alarm.

“Yibo!!” Xiao Zhan fell to the floor beside Yibo, placing both hands on his shoulders to straighten him. “Are you okay?”

“No, ge!” Yibo finally admitted to himself. “I don’t think I am.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've posted several new fics in the last few days for zsww/lsfy week, please do go check them out.  
> 1\. [like falling petals](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29390259) (hanahaki au)  
> 2\. [Of broken vending machines and jammed doors](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29413098) (pwp)  
> 3\. [Ethereal Sun](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29465202) (fantasy au)  
> 4\. [morning cuddles](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29490594) (fluffy smut)  
> 5\. [Your Promised Heart](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29437485) (historical au)  
> 6\. [The art of surrender](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29514975) (dirty smut)
> 
> here is the collection for the zsww/lsfy week, do go check out all the works submitted: <https://archiveofourown.org/collections/zsww_lsfy_week_2021/works>


	294. Kiss me before I die of pain

* * *

“Come inside,” Xiao Zhan helped Yibo up as he slung Yibo’s arm around his neck and lifted him up. 

Yibo hobbled inside with the help of Xiao Zhan, wincing with the effort. He sat down on the bed and Xiao Zhan knelt in front of him on the floor.

“How are you feeling?” Xiao Zhan searched Yibo’s pain stricken face worriedly. 

“I feel...a lot of pain in my chest...and I’m feeling very dizzy,” Yibo rasped as he massaged his chest.

“Let me call the reception and ask them to send their on call doctor,” Xiao Zhan began getting up but was stopped by Yibo with a hand around his wrist.

“No, Zhan-ge!” Yibo winced again with the effort it took to speak.

“What? Why?!” Xiao Zhan asked, perplexed.

“What if...how are we going to explain my presence here in your room!?” Yibo asked wide-eyed.

“Yibo, that is not important right now, plus doctor-patient confidentiality, and this hotel is very discreet with many high profile clients,” Xiao Zhan grunted and rolled his eyes. 

Yibo watched as Xiao Zhan made the call. A few moments later, Xiao Zhan was by his side again.

“She’ll be here soon,” Xiao Zhan sat beside Yibo. “Can I do something until then?” Xiao Zhan massaged Yibo’s back soothingly.

Yibo shook his head but then smirked and nodded. 

“What?”

“Kiss me before I die of pain, Xiao Zhan,” Yibo chuckled.

“Oh my god, you are such an incorrigible brat!” Xiao Zhan smacked his arm but then leaned in and enveloped Yibo’s lips.

Yibo sighed into the kiss and Xiao Zhan let Yibo kiss him hungrily. A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. Xiao Zhan kissed Yibo on the forehead and went towards the door. 

“Hello,” a young female doctor smiled and waved at him. “I am the on-call doctor...I was told there is a patient here. Do I have the right room?” 

“Hello,” Xiao Zhan extended his hand and smiled back. “I’m Xiao Zhan and yes, this is the right room.”

“Of course I know who you are,” the woman laughed and shook her head. “Are you ill?”

“No,” Xiao Zhan’s smile faltered for a brief moment. “My friend is...but we would like to request your discretion before you see him.”

“I understand,” the woman smiled. “You are a public figure.”

“Thank you,” Xiao Zhan opened the door fully and gestured for her to step in. 

* * *

“It seems like acute heartburn but I can only treat the symptoms until I know the cause,” the woman stated after half an hour of questioning and examining Yibo. “Are you on any medications? Or has there been any significant change to your diet recently?”

“No, Yibo shook his head.

“Yes,” Xiao Zhan interjected. “Tell her about the suppressants.”

“Oh yeah,” Yibo grinned sheepishly. “I started taking appetite suppressants but that was a few months ago.”

“That might be it,” the woman frowned. “You seem underweight for someone your height, and if you’ve been taking those medicines long enough that they aren’t suiting your body,” she pursed her lips, “then it could lead to these symptoms chronically.”

“Oh,” Yibo replied and glanced at Xiao Zhan who was frowning as well. “Do I have to stop them then?” He asked warily. 

“Yes,” the doctor nodded and crossed her arms across her chest.

“But I...I need them for my diet to work,” Yibo looked at her pleadingly. 

“We could try and find another brand that suits you better,” she replied after a moment’s thought, “although I don’t recommend suppressants in general.”

“Yibo,” Xiao Zhan pinned him with a knowing look, “you’re taking this to an extreme level. We all have to stay fit for this profession but maybe suppressants aren’t the way to go,” he spoke, voice laced with concern. 

“Okay, I...I’ll try,” Yibo looked down and gulped.

“For now, I’ll prescribe some medicines that the reception can get for you,” the doctor continued, “that should help with the symptoms for now. But you should see an overall improvement in your health if you stop the suppressants.”

“Thank you, doctor,” Xiao Zhan replied when Yibo remained silent. 

“No problem, take care Wang Yibo,” she smiled at both of them before Xiao Zhan escorted her out once more. 

When Xiao Zhan returned, Yibo still hadn’t moved. 

“What’s the matter, Bo-di?” Xiao Zhan knelt between his legs and cupped his face.

“I can’t...I don’t know if I can give them up,” Yibo whispered.

“Yibo...I’ll be right by your side...you can do this...it’s the right thing to do according to the doctor…”

“I know but...what if…” Yibo leaned into Xiao Zhan’s touch and closed his eyes.

“What if what, sweetie?” 

“What if I get too fat?” Yibo whispered even lower this time.

“Yibo, you won’t!” Xiao Zhan replied. “And even if you do, you can always figure out a healthier approach to weight loss with a proper doctor.”

“But…” Yibo paused hesitantly.

“But what, gouzaizai?” Xiao Zhan kissed Yibo’s cheek.

“But will you still be attracted to me if I get fat?”

“Wang Yibo!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed in disbelief. “I will always love you, no matter what size you are! Do you understand me?”

“But will you be _attracted_ to me?” Yibo gazed into Xiao Zhan’s eyes. 

“Yibo,” Xiao Zhan let out a breathy laugh and shook his head. “I will always be attracted to you...not because of your body...but because of…” he pointed a finger at Yibo’s chest and placed it there pointedly, “you.”

Yibo let out a small smile as Xiao Zhan placed another kiss on his heart. 

“Do you understand?” Xiao Zhan whispered.

“Mn,” Yibo nodded and rested his forehead against Xiao Zhan’s. “Show me how attracted you are to me,” he smiled wider.

“How about for now, I show you how much I love you,” Xiao Zhan murmured against his lips.

Yibo pouted playfully, prompting Xiao Zhan to plant a kiss on his pout. 

“Come on, Bo-di,” Xiao Zhan stood up and ran a hand through Yibo’s hair. “Let me take care of you.”

“I’m fine, ge,” Yibo laughed softly. “Once I’ll take the meds, I’ll be fine.”

“You’ve supported me so much as I’ve gone through therapy and my anxiety...this is the least I can do for you...let me take care of you, didi,” Xiao Zhan kissed Yibo’s forehead. “Please.”

“What did you have in mind?” Yibo raised a smug eyebrow.

“How about a relaxing bath followed by soothing body massage,” Xiao Zhan wiggled his eyebrows with a playful smile. 

“That sounds perfect, Zhan-ge,” Yibo sighed just as Xiao Zhan leaned in for another kiss. “That sounds perfect.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've posted several new fics in the last few days for zsww/lsfy week, please do go check them out.  
> 1\. [like falling petals](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29390259) (hanahaki au)  
> 2\. [Of broken vending machines and jammed doors](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29413098) (pwp)  
> 3\. [Ethereal Sun](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29465202) (sun god!xz, prince!yibo, lots of pining and angst and smut)  
> 4\. [morning cuddles](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29490594) (fluffy smut)  
> 5\. [Your Promised Heart](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29437485) (courtesans yizhan, historical au)  
> 6\. [The art of surrender](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29514975) (dirty smut, so good)  
> 7\. [My roommate is a cat](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29561106) (catboy!yibo, fluffy feel-good)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Yizhan a través de los años ( escrito por JALPARI)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29482980) by [Zhanbobaobei](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zhanbobaobei/pseuds/Zhanbobaobei)




End file.
